September 4, 2024 • 31 mins
In Part 2 of this 4 part series of Selwa Mitchell’s incredible journey, we dive deeper into the unbreakable bond between Selwa and her four best friends, who stood by her side through the toughest days of her second lung transplant. From sleepless nights in the ICU to sharing moments of laughter and love, these women reveal the little miracles that kept Selwa going. Witness the power of unwavering friendship, relentless faith, and the extraordinary will to live as they share how Selwa fought against all odds. From pulling through on ECMO life support to preparing for her third transplant, this episode is a raw and emotional testament to resilience, hope, and the incredible strength of the human spirit. Tune in for the stories that prove miracles do happen!
#TooPoshPodcast #MiracleInTheICU #SelwaMitchell #LungTransplant #FriendshipGoals #UnbreakableBond #FaithAndHope #SurvivorStories #Resilience #PodcastEpisode
#TooPoshPodcast #MiracleInTheICU #SelwaMitchell #LungTransplant #FriendshipGoals #UnbreakableBond #FaithAndHope #SurvivorStories #Resilience #PodcastEpisode
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Tupash Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
I am Gabrielle.
Speaker 3 (00:04):
I'm a former New York Mafia princess originally from Austria.
I am the mother of three and the owner of
Tupash Boutique and here with my beautiful co host Masella,
my daughter.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
Hello, I'm Marcella. I'm a dancer, choreographer, model and designer
for Tupash and I say whatever I want.
Speaker 5 (00:25):
My name is Cruz. I am a stylist. I also
own the Society Salon in the Design District and I
am a short, little Mexican with the big personality.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
What will they say next?
Speaker 5 (00:37):
Welcome to the Tupash Podcast.
Speaker 6 (00:53):
Where Scott really had to play a role and all
you is when I start, when they were taking me
off lives for taking.
Speaker 7 (00:59):
Me off the list, and Scott had to be like, no, no, no, no,
I promise you she can do this.
Speaker 6 (01:05):
And you guys all witnessed that that was the hardest time.
I mean, I mean y'all have And that's the thing
I do like to hear these stories because I wasn't there.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Just guys, can you talk about this? Is that the
that's the second transfer?
Speaker 8 (01:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (01:17):
Correct, Yeah, that is the one I think were there.
Speaker 6 (01:21):
When what I like to hear is all the little miracles,
so many there are. I I mean, I love all
also to like the ones we're like Brittany and Corney
all were like.
Speaker 7 (01:30):
Take to tell them about how y'all like took shifts.
Speaker 6 (01:32):
But like y'all like the times that you were eating
like like five days day.
Speaker 9 (01:39):
We would live and.
Speaker 10 (01:42):
Because Scott needed to be.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
One at a time.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Yeah, yeah, so you made a schedule. We had a schedule.
Speaker 9 (01:49):
It was like we would sometimes overlap.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
I would overlap a little, and then you'd have a
few nights by yourself, and then you'd overlap with the
next person and then you'd have a.
Speaker 11 (01:56):
Nights out in Phoenix, out in Phoenix.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
Probably to overlap. Sometimes it's not you're not just by yourself.
Speaker 10 (02:02):
It was a training perspective, right.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Just so you knew what was going on and catch
you up on like because in three days watch so
much could change.
Speaker 10 (02:09):
Because this was when she was in the ICU. So
every you know, and and obviously Scott was there too,
but Scott needed to be with the kids.
Speaker 12 (02:15):
Well Scott wasn't he was sick, he flew, he couldn't
go up well and then that was I felt sorry
for y'all because I didn't understand why he wasn't there,
Because I was like.
Speaker 9 (02:26):
Her was heartbreaking.
Speaker 8 (02:27):
I explained to her every I was about to say
every night, but honestly it'd be hourly.
Speaker 9 (02:33):
Yeah, you would have to explain to her like Babe.
Speaker 11 (02:36):
Scott did not he's he wants to be here.
Speaker 9 (02:39):
She wants to be here. He's sick, he is taking
care of the kids, he's holding it down.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
This was all around Christmas. Also, you have to understand
this Thanksgiving. I think I flew home on Christmas.
Speaker 9 (02:49):
Eve and so that part was hard. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (02:53):
Well, and then I couldn't see very well, so y'all
were trying to y'all were trying not to show me
right like that I couldn't see very well.
Speaker 9 (02:59):
Well, so you're they wanted me to tell her that
she was blind.
Speaker 10 (03:04):
And then and then I think you guys called me
and I was like, no, that's not happening. God is
not going to have her blind, Okay. All she wants
to do is see her children's faces.
Speaker 9 (03:14):
She is not going to go blind.
Speaker 6 (03:16):
I know, because like Amy would have to keep the
phone from me, and I would, you know how I
get like I get very I know, I was very
difficult to do, but.
Speaker 11 (03:22):
You're on That wasn't what it was at all.
Speaker 8 (03:26):
It was mostly just us wanting to comfort you, right
and let you know what was going on. And obviously
she's just come out of heavy anesthesias. She's been on
massive EMO for a month, which most people don't make
it off of. What is that similar to what you
heard about during COVID when people would get very sick,
they'd have to be it's like artificial lungs. And so
(03:48):
for most patients, if you're on ECBO, you know, two weeks,
that's pushing it.
Speaker 9 (03:53):
Yeah, that's the limit you want to get off. This
fighter over here.
Speaker 11 (03:58):
She was all brush teeth on that and striking our.
Speaker 10 (04:01):
Hair and doing making because I where's my makeup?
Speaker 11 (04:05):
No, dob't.
Speaker 8 (04:06):
So obviously coming out of that there is a level
of confusion and medication and drugs and all of these
things that that need to come together and.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
So well, and she lost time. I mean she lost time.
You know, she went in December second, I think, almost simber,
and then now it's.
Speaker 9 (04:25):
It took a while to convention.
Speaker 13 (04:26):
You had the surgery, yeah, you know, because you were
like I haven't had it, and we were like, no,
we've had it. No, no, no, no, when are they going
to do it? When they're gonna you know, you're not
speaking because you.
Speaker 7 (04:35):
Had to you'll had to like figure out what I
was saying.
Speaker 11 (04:37):
Yeah, I was like, no, it's happened, you know well,
And I.
Speaker 6 (04:40):
Think because at that time my breath was not satisfying
and so I didn't understand like you still fin and
it's because I had a lot of fluid like on
my lungs and which was really cool because doctor Toteman,
because I was like, I'm telling you this is something's wrong.
And so doctor Toteman, which was really cool.
Speaker 7 (04:57):
She she listens to.
Speaker 6 (04:58):
Me because she understood how and tuned I was to
my body. So she's like, all right, we'll do am.
I don't know what they did, yeah yeah, and she
was like, oh yeah, you have like all so they
had to drigg it like drill a hole and it was.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
New Years around, yeah it was.
Speaker 8 (05:15):
And then they drilled and begged me not to do
it though You're like, I please, don't, please don't. I
don't want to be in the enclosed and Maria, I
don't want to do it. Don't let them do it.
Speaker 7 (05:22):
Really, I don't remember it that way. And to do
the m r A or.
Speaker 9 (05:26):
To be in the enclosed like like austrophobic. And I
was like, babe, you're going to do it.
Speaker 7 (05:33):
And then they said I have the only chance mm hmm.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
And then they took but then they took me into
a room and they drilled like a hole in me
right to pull out the fluid.
Speaker 8 (05:42):
That was the second time. We did so many scans
at the at the beginning. At the first time, she
was still pretty out of it and she's begging me, please, don't, don't.
Speaker 9 (05:51):
Do it, don't and I can't.
Speaker 8 (05:52):
She's like, I don't want to do it. I can't
get enclosed in there. I don't want to do it.
Speaker 7 (05:55):
And we just I don't remember any of this.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
I mean, you don't have any memory.
Speaker 7 (06:00):
I don't. I don't.
Speaker 6 (06:01):
This is like the first time ever. But I will
say too, Amy got like the worship is what I heard,
because so I was this like just coming and everything.
Speaker 7 (06:10):
Sorry, I don't know. It all worked and.
Speaker 9 (06:13):
It all works out for a reason, you know.
Speaker 8 (06:15):
And I had the ability to I mean when it's
during the holidays, so I'm it was off work.
Speaker 9 (06:20):
I don't have children.
Speaker 8 (06:22):
They all need to be with their families during during
this time, and there was no there was nowhere else
I was going to be.
Speaker 9 (06:28):
You know, there was nowhere else that was going to be.
I just knew that.
Speaker 10 (06:33):
Yeah, she just got the angriest Sella.
Speaker 7 (06:36):
Yeah, yeah, I remember.
Speaker 9 (06:39):
There were moments when I was like, oh my gosh,
but didn't.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
I pull something out. I was so confused.
Speaker 8 (06:45):
Though, I mean, yeah, very confused. In the hospital staff
is like, you've got to get her to stay in bed.
You've got to get her to leave the tubes, you've
got to get her to whatever.
Speaker 9 (06:54):
And then she would she would chill out, and then
she'd be like, you've got to get them to take
this off, like you've got it.
Speaker 8 (07:00):
So the gare coming to me and tell me one thing,
and soel was coming to me and saying, you got
to get them to take this off of me. I'd
want to be able to sit up. I want to
be able to get out of bed. You literally couldn't
sleep at night because she would get up. She you
didn't when you were there, you were like, don't worry,
she can't get up.
Speaker 9 (07:15):
She's like sedated. She can't get out of it, and
I'm like.
Speaker 13 (07:18):
You want to bet yeh, She's trying to slide off
the bed and you're just trying to slide, like slither off.
Speaker 7 (07:24):
Because you were like you can't get to the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
It was like, all.
Speaker 8 (07:30):
She wasn't supposed to do any of those things on
her own for a very extended period of time, and
this girl's doing him like days after little Yeah, well
she's supposedly blind.
Speaker 10 (07:41):
Yeah, well that was the thing that we didn't really
touch on the blindness.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
We didn't know what she could see.
Speaker 10 (07:47):
We didn't know what she could see, and like they
pretty much told Scott like she's because she did go
in a long failure and all of those things. So
that happened, you know, when she was off the list,
right because they Scott had to prove that she could
get back on the list, and her body had to
prove that too by the lung function of her heart.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
And mainly like this was like hours, Yeah, this is
all happening.
Speaker 10 (08:11):
But but truly, I mean, you know, at one point
we thought she was blind and I will never forget
the first time. So like here's an example, you'd find
things to calm her and one thing that really calmed
her when I was there was she couldn't see Pride
and Prejudice the movie, but I would just play it,
and I mean, she knows everywhere everything to the movie,
(08:32):
so we would just play it over and over and
I think I'm watching it. She thinks she's watching it,
but she's not, and then I'll never forget. She was like,
can you please hand me my makeup back? And I
was like, and like all day, I was like, I'm
not going to give her a makeup back, because then
she's gonna know if she can't see it, you know
what I mean, I like trying to like and then
like one day, I finally was like, I'm just giving
(08:54):
her the makeup back.
Speaker 11 (08:55):
You know.
Speaker 10 (08:55):
So I handed to her and she starts putting her
makeup on, and then I'm like, she.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
What she can actually see?
Speaker 10 (09:02):
So it was gradually coming back, you know.
Speaker 6 (09:05):
She kept on putting those yellow socks on me.
Speaker 10 (09:09):
Me and Sola have a funny relationship because we like
to pick on each other, and so like like, yeah,
she hated these yellow socks.
Speaker 7 (09:16):
She's still like the ones that the issue the hospital.
Speaker 10 (09:19):
She always wanted her socks. But then I'd always take
them off and put her yellow sucks on just to
make her.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
Look down at like Dan, Actually it was the ugly ones.
Speaker 10 (09:27):
But that's guys with the humor, Like I think, you
just have to laugh your way through like serious situations,
and she's great at doing that too.
Speaker 6 (09:35):
We have fun together, like even in you know, the
in the ICU on my death bet, we have fun together.
Speaker 9 (09:41):
We do.
Speaker 13 (09:42):
We have to switch back and forth because it's it's
like it's healing to do both, you know, you kind
of just need to have that outlet. Well.
Speaker 6 (09:51):
And then that just shows how much love we have
for each other to be in a situation like that,
and to be so comfortable together in a situation like
and just you know, love each.
Speaker 7 (10:02):
Other in the worst plausible way.
Speaker 8 (10:05):
And that's that's also a testament to you, though, Selah,
because I feel like there are so many people who
who can't be vulnerable, who even around people that they love,
could not allow themselves to be cared for in that way.
And it is a level of bringing your guard down,
even amongst people that are like family.
Speaker 6 (10:27):
Basically right, But again, but allow me to bring my
guard down, you know, I mean, y'all y'all create this
environment for me to be me and love me.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
So I have a really important question about that, because
I think it's always to help someone in a situation
like this. Sometimes people go no, no, we don't need it,
or no we don't want, don't come or whatever. How
did you guys figure this out that you are really
becoming her like life?
Speaker 2 (11:00):
How?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
She says, because he never asked, That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 10 (11:04):
Well, and they usually don't want you docot.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
We would let Scott ask for our once she got.
Speaker 10 (11:09):
Married, and during this time it was all driven by drive,
respect everything.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
If Scott wants to do it all, then we'll set
back and send food or take care of the kids
or no, but he knows now like to reach out.
Speaker 9 (11:23):
Yeah, we're there.
Speaker 13 (11:24):
We went several days without knowing anything because he was
dealing with every the EGMO and all that stuff, and
we just had to be on standba and knowing we
cannot bombard him because he's doing everything he can.
Speaker 9 (11:36):
And he has a million people asking questions and I want.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
Scott had to learn. I think Scott learned like, oh
I do need to lean on them also, like they
are Sella's life's support.
Speaker 7 (11:47):
Also well that and he knows like that's what she that's.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
What she needs, and it helps him in the long run.
Speaker 6 (11:53):
I mean, I remember him, I'm saying, he's like I
think he got it when he got the flu and
and he just hated to do this to you guys
because it was during the holidays and Christmas eve and
he I remember I think he called Ashley and was.
Speaker 10 (12:08):
Just like, I was like, we need you. I was
like waiting.
Speaker 7 (12:13):
Already have a ticket, Like it.
Speaker 10 (12:17):
Wouldn't you want to help and you can't be there right,
Like that's why I'm start right and so but going
to that question, like the first transplant, you know, was
very different. And so I just have we just had
their children, I mean, because that's that's a great way
you can help them, not having to be worried about
their kids, you know. And I think that we're just
(12:38):
all like whatever we need to do, we'll do it.
We're there and were taking.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
Direct all hands on, or we can be hands off
and send And.
Speaker 10 (12:45):
I think we take direction from Scott unless we know
she's going dark, do you know what I mean? Which
doesn't happen often, but we know when it's happening, and
then we forced ourselves over to our house.
Speaker 11 (12:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (13:00):
I'll be the first to admit that when it is
getting too much, I will kind of close out because.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
And it normally involves a phone call of one of
us calling the other and like we were gonna comes
get munch, someone send out a random text that we're
bringing here.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (13:15):
Yeah, and then I'm like, of course, yes, but I think,
I mean in my mind, I mean, you know, there's
a lot going on, and I don't want to just
spew all of this on you, even though I know.
Speaker 7 (13:26):
That y'all would take it.
Speaker 6 (13:27):
It's just so yeah, and I'm I'm I'm not there yet,
but I am like, you know, because I am like
twenty eight percent and I'm on.
Speaker 7 (13:35):
This I'm in this weird place right.
Speaker 9 (13:37):
Now, living pattern.
Speaker 7 (13:39):
Yeah, and but I don't.
Speaker 6 (13:41):
Want it to be right like so I want to
still be living while I'm holding.
Speaker 10 (13:45):
So we're so that's why it's good.
Speaker 6 (13:46):
Like today we have today and we're going to see
each other and we'll go get dinner and you know, just.
Speaker 9 (13:52):
You know, grace.
Speaker 13 (13:53):
Yeah, anytime we get just been together is like the
most precious minutes truly.
Speaker 7 (13:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 11 (13:59):
I mean, we all have kids, well, we have kids too,
and husbands and whatever, but there's just a special connection
that there's nothing out there that I can compare this to.
Speaker 6 (14:13):
You know, well, I think in general, women in general
need that connection and not just be like a wife,
like like it's it's so important to be I love
being your all's best friend, and I mean like that
gives me purpose and I feel so special like that
I have you guys.
Speaker 10 (14:30):
And we so feel so special that we have her,
you know. I mean, like she's changed every aspect of
my life, you know. I mean there's there is not
one part of my life that she hasn't changed, truly.
I mean everything from like you were saying earlier, just
you know, oh I don't want to work out today?
Are you kidding?
Speaker 2 (14:48):
I Instagram?
Speaker 10 (14:51):
Oh my god, Like from the most basics to like
the most you know, like I said, like, I've had
a medical kind of crisis in my home else and uh,
we needed to find the best doctor, and the best
doctor was in Minnesota, and I didn't think a second
about picking myself up and moving me and one of
my family members there. I would have never done that
(15:12):
that easily if I hadn't had the experience I had
with Sea where we just picked up and went to Phoenix,
like it was like, no big deal, this is what
you do, you know, you just go And so it's
I mean, she's truly I think we could all say
just we're so blessed that God chose us to be
her friend friends.
Speaker 9 (15:28):
She makes all of us a better person.
Speaker 11 (15:32):
Without hands down, it's true, true.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
I can't I am telling you, I have said that
from the beginning. It's like I don't even know her
at all, but I do know her now and it's
it made a change in my life one million percent
her and I talk about it one million percent one
of her best friends. It's like incredible and I feel
(16:00):
blessed the guys, I hear well.
Speaker 6 (16:01):
I wish I could explain that from the flip side though.
The fact that you guys like care and love and
actually you know that gives me fuel and it shows
it is a testament to your heart and to your
soul for you guys to recognize that this is someone
that's hurting, but she's thriving and I want to help
her in any way. And I just think that that's
(16:22):
a beautiful testament to you guys, is that you see
you know, someone like you care, you know what I mean?
People I don't care, Thank you for carings.
Speaker 10 (16:34):
Just something else. We talk about a lot, which is
being curious versus really concerning, okay or being concerned, Like
there's a really fine line. And I think Sola and
all of us in all our lives have seen this.
You know, somebody goes through hard time like a divorce,
you know, you know pretty quick who just wants to
know what's going on? Who is truly and maybe they
(16:57):
don't even know. They don't need to do all the details.
They are just there to support you, you know, because
you're hurting, because you're writing yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
And we have our own separate like prayer warriors places
and we've built them to pray for Sea that aren't
even close to Selah that I don't even know her
really right, we don't have to text them or call
them the details. We can just tell them like I
need you to pray today for Sea and they're on it.
Whereas there's some people that want to know all the
details so that then they can go tell everyone else
(17:25):
the details. So you learn the nice balance of yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
Yeah, can I just I'm such a big believer in
the friendship and all that. I want one more question
about that, like when she goes dark, I want to
know those next steps you guys take, Like so you
give her that dark time for a little bit and
how long? Do I find it so important? I think
(17:49):
sometimes people don't know what to do. Yes, so I
feel like that give them a little guidance of what
did you do?
Speaker 10 (17:57):
What do you talk with each other? We probably all
handled it a little bit differently, honestly, I mean, and
we can always probably talk about even when we go dark,
because I think we all know everybody's different way to
go dark, you know, and like we probably treat each
of us a little bit differently. But for Selah and
me at least, I know it's crazy. But when she
(18:20):
goes dark, I have dreams and it's crazy, like we
can link it all the way back to well even
as soon as I start having dreams, I know what
kind I mean, it can just be just dreaming about her,
about the purple Oh yeah, I mean, I mean, yeah,
it is a good story. But you want me to
(18:41):
share that story. So when we at this point, this
was it's hard. I know, I'm trying to like put
it to where you can know where we are in
the process.
Speaker 6 (18:51):
So you know, well I think I was. Yeah, they said,
they say, oh they thought I was. What is it
a vegetable?
Speaker 7 (18:59):
Yeah it was.
Speaker 10 (19:00):
It was after lung failure for sure. So it was
after lung failure, before the second transplant, after lung failure,
and we had gotten it is kind of when Scott
was just so focused, like Brittany was saying, you know,
we couldn't get as many updates, which we totally understand,
and Scott sent an update that was really like just
praise for her heart, like like we have got to
(19:22):
get her heart, you know, say taking me off the list,
and yeah, she was off the list. And I just
had a moment which you know, and I just was
so mad, you know, I mean it is hard not
to get mad, you.
Speaker 9 (19:35):
Know, you go through a range of emotions.
Speaker 10 (19:37):
Yeah, and I was like on Marco, which we Marco
was our savior through this lung train, because.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
She did go dark, like let's get Marco like.
Speaker 10 (19:46):
It in yeah, you'll keep okay, So basically I'm on
Marco with them, which is like I don't know if
you know what Marco is, but it's like like.
Speaker 9 (19:54):
A video chess video check.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
It's texting, texting, but with the video, and.
Speaker 10 (19:59):
I'm like, I'm done.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
I'm done.
Speaker 10 (20:02):
I am going to turn on beaches.
Speaker 13 (20:07):
When you threatened the beaches, I was like, oh no, no,
and I was like, I'm doing it.
Speaker 10 (20:14):
I turn it on beaches tonight. I'm so mad. This
is what is going on, you know. And I couldn't
find beaches. I actually tried to look for it. I
couldn't find it. But that night I had this dream
and it was Salah coming home from the hospital and
she had a purple sweater on and I just saw
her come home, like I saw her come home. And
(20:36):
I woke up that next day and I texted them
and I was like, she's going to come home.
Speaker 9 (20:40):
I was just like it's gonna be I mean, it
was it was like, you know, as soon.
Speaker 10 (20:42):
As you lose hope, you lose everything, right, And God
knew I needed a little bit of hope. And so
the next day Scott. That's when Scott called and said,
I have the flu, and Nobela has the flu. So
I was the first one that got there. And I'll
never forget he was so sick and we were in
the hospital room. He was teaching me like everything that
(21:05):
I needed to look at, you know, to be sure
because he was going to leave for the first time.
Speaker 9 (21:09):
And you're checking oxygen levels, you're looking at a lot.
Speaker 10 (21:11):
But this was before and ya and so and then
before the train, before before we knew we had lungs,
and so.
Speaker 11 (21:18):
It was like December. It was the first of December.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
So she's the thought of like, like, that's what's going on.
And he gets the flu and yes, and mother and
her mom and they couldn't be at the hospital and
Joe Phil and.
Speaker 7 (21:31):
We had to have surgery. So she.
Speaker 10 (21:34):
Got back on the list that day or maybe like
right before. And I walked in and I looked at
him and I said, I promise you she's coming home.
And I was like, I cannot believe I'm saying this.
And I was like I saw her come home home,
and God is going to bring her home. And then
he left and I got on my knees and I
(21:56):
was like, listen to me, I just promise it's this man.
I remember visiting that this was my I mean, I'm like,
I can't even believe I just did that, you know,
I didn't even know how I did it. And then
four hours later, they got the call that there were lungs.
Speaker 6 (22:13):
Wow, and what do you know what sweater I went
home with? Obviously there's a picture of me.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
We need that picture. Oh my goodness.
Speaker 10 (22:29):
I think I bought it for you. I was like,
you're wearing.
Speaker 6 (22:38):
Ya wow.
Speaker 10 (22:41):
So yeah, when I know she's dark, it's weird. And
she does the same thing with me. It's like a
dream thing.
Speaker 11 (22:46):
Mine is a dream too, but it's not a dream. Actually,
God wakes me up in the middle of the night.
Speaker 13 (22:49):
It's usually like three am and the time that I
would never wake up, and he's like start brand and
I don't know, I'm a reason And it's usually kind
of you know, around the time.
Speaker 7 (23:04):
Usually I'll get it.
Speaker 6 (23:05):
I'll send out of text the next day and I'll say, guys,
I really need.
Speaker 7 (23:08):
So you're like already started.
Speaker 12 (23:11):
Wow.
Speaker 6 (23:12):
Well, and Brittany has like a direct line, like the
way she prays, and you definitely have a direct line.
Speaker 7 (23:18):
So I'm always like, britt.
Speaker 11 (23:21):
I know he answers.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Yeah. So and then when you have to dream, then
how do you guys get back because it's such a
fine line, like when somebody is go start Normally I.
Speaker 10 (23:35):
Don't really tell me first I call, there's a back chain,
there's a back channel, and then we decide who's gonna
call yeah, you know what I mean, and who's going
to approach it. And then it's normally like let's get
a game plan.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yeah, and it's gonna go.
Speaker 11 (23:47):
Like I'm bringing the Madeline.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
We'll see you, And it'll start with like one of
us will send a cryptic texts of like, oh my gosh,
I'm going through a really hard time and I need
to see everybody.
Speaker 8 (23:57):
So I'm like, but she's like me too, I have
blown in for lunches or yeah today, well anything, what
about the time what about the time that I be
bopped into the hospital in Courtney's like crazy bear hat
and cool.
Speaker 6 (24:17):
So I was doing photo foresis because we were hoping
I wasn't going to need a second transplant, right, So,
and I was I was not doing well, and these.
Speaker 9 (24:24):
Things take forever.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
You would be in there for hours, four hours, and
we took over, yes.
Speaker 7 (24:29):
And so Casey would always wear those big heads, you know.
Speaker 6 (24:33):
Yeah, And so I thought Casey and like I think
I thought like maybe Casey and Ashley were coming or
and so you'll both have these big heads on and
so it's you know, and I'm like, oh, and then
Amy takes her hat or the head off, and.
Speaker 7 (24:46):
I'm like, what's.
Speaker 6 (24:50):
So it's just again, it's the little things like that
that I just think, let my you know, my fire
kept me going through a long I mean again, y'all
have to work really hard for a very.
Speaker 7 (25:00):
Long period of time.
Speaker 9 (25:00):
To keep might not work though not.
Speaker 10 (25:05):
I mean, we're just again just so blessed to be
able to be part of the miracle, you know, I mean,
because that's really what it is.
Speaker 6 (25:11):
And I really wish we could write down like all
the little things like and again, sometimes a miracle can happen,
but you don't realize it's a miracle just yet until
we look at it in hindsight and we're like, oh,
so that's why you did that, that's our I mean,
just there's yeah, there's just there's little tiny miracles that
we should probably all write down, which y'all probably know more,
yeah than I do.
Speaker 10 (25:31):
I think we did write a lot of them down.
Speaker 11 (25:33):
But and then just you know, in general, like your life,
your whole life.
Speaker 13 (25:37):
Because you know, we talk about on the other side
of heaven, like you know, so it's gone to so
much on earth, and you know, God is blessing those
trials and everything.
Speaker 11 (25:49):
She may not see all of that. I mean we're
here talking with you guys.
Speaker 13 (25:52):
She may not see all the people that she's impacted
until that point, and it'll all be worth it at
that point, you know, even though this is hard, and
she would, I would, we would take this from you know,
her at any given moment. And but He's got a
huge plan and there's been there's been so many people's
lives that have been impacted because of her strength, her
(26:14):
faith and in his relationship with her.
Speaker 6 (26:18):
So and I'm I don't mind taking it on, like
I if if I don't see it, but like knowing
and when you guys tell me things like that, knowing
that I am influencing people to just keep going because.
Speaker 7 (26:30):
Life is hard. It is I mean, long transplant or not.
Life is hard.
Speaker 6 (26:36):
So I like being a little bit of a light like, Okay,
if she can do it, I can do it. It
gives me a little more purpose, gives this madness a
little more makes more sense.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
So the Duke, for instance, what what's the lung?
Speaker 11 (26:52):
Like?
Speaker 3 (26:52):
How low do you have to go before that?
Speaker 7 (26:55):
Yeah, I mean I think we're I don't. I don't know.
I think I'm close.
Speaker 6 (26:59):
So in December, I'm going to if if I don't,
if I'm staying stable like I am now, I will
see them in December twelfth. Uh, and that's they're going
to do some more tests.
Speaker 7 (27:09):
Do like more PFTs, like just see.
Speaker 6 (27:11):
Where I'm at. And again, like what my doctor Totemund always.
Speaker 7 (27:16):
Says is like, you know, don't show about your.
Speaker 6 (27:18):
Strength, like go in there and show them how you feel,
because I mean, like right now, you know I don't
feel too great. You know, I'm on avil and you
know I did like five treatments before we got here
like so but so but then again like I'm like this,
like you can't tell that I need one to oka
right well? And that's like doctor Toeman, remember, I mean
like she was like sit me home that day when
(27:41):
I actually went into a coma that night because she
was but she was just like be so truthful on
how you feel because I mean and I try to,
but I don't know how to. Like I don't know
how to, I don't know how to not not you know. So,
but so I'm gonna get there and I'm gonna try
to be I mean, I'll let the test kind of
show for itself. But it's like sometimes I contradict the
(28:03):
tests because like I'm blowing like a twenty nine, but
I'm also doing pull ups, you know, And it's just
like I just have to make sure they understand that
I do need them and that I am weet like again,
I'm ready for the table, but strong enough to survive.
I mean again that balance is where.
Speaker 3 (28:18):
It And then your heart since you had a heart
attack and they did the hard test, Yeah.
Speaker 7 (28:23):
Everything looks good.
Speaker 6 (28:24):
So I think they're like, I want you to just
look at my gall bladder. I mean they're like, it's
so funny that they I mean, you know, there was
one thing to my kidneys look really good, and I
thought this was interesting. I think I might have talked
about this before. But like some transplants, in order to
get it, if they have bad kidney numbers, they have
to have someone sign a thing that says, hey, i'll
(28:46):
give her kidneys if she needs them.
Speaker 7 (28:47):
So and I kind of was like, nobody wants you've
got the kidney stones too, remember where.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
I was like, if it helps SAT lose weight, I'll
give you.
Speaker 6 (29:06):
But yeah, so but thankfully I don't need a signature
for that. And so I guess again, I don't want
to say I'm waiting. I just want to say that
I'm living and we'll see.
Speaker 9 (29:17):
And I tried it.
Speaker 10 (29:18):
That's what we try to encourage her to, like, the
only person that can figure out this timing is God. Like,
it's the most complex situation, you know what I mean, No, Hue,
I mean, I just don't think it's anyone's timing, you know.
I mean we're so thankful for her donors. I mean,
like her donors are obviously like I mean, heroes, and
(29:38):
but God knows who that is, do you know what
I mean? And how this all plays in because she's small,
and it has to be the perfect person, you know.
I mean like there's just we can't And so I
try to say, we cannot focus on the timing because
there is absolutely no way any of us can figure
it out, you know. I mean, although I know that's
very hard for you to do.
Speaker 6 (29:59):
Yeah, well, I mean we all play like that's where
you all like, Okay, let's go over there, and.
Speaker 13 (30:03):
We can start to get kind of panicky, you know,
and be like why are these things not moving?
Speaker 11 (30:06):
Why are these people on calling back, Look, what's the deal?
Speaker 13 (30:08):
Why why is this paperwork being cogno and all this,
and we just have to constantly be like, it's not
in our hands, right, it truly isn't. And the day
that it happens, in the day you get, we get
the call is the perfect time, in the perfect place,
in the perfect everything.
Speaker 7 (30:24):
Hi.
Speaker 9 (30:24):
I'm Olivia Gooley.
Speaker 7 (30:25):
I'm one of the gossip girls here at Tupash Podcasts.
You can find me on Instagram at Liv's World and
if you need me, I'll be crying in my Bentley.
Speaker 4 (30:33):
I'm Marcella, co host of the Tupash podcast. You can
find me on all social media platforms, Marcellainary. You can
also find me on TikTok, Marcella roinary seven and I
say whatever the fuck I want.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
My name is CRUs Kaffer. You can find me on Instagram.
And that's pretty much it, and let's do some tequila
together on the next show.
Speaker 3 (31:01):
If you enjoy listening to our show, please follow tupash
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(31:21):
on Instagram at Gabby dot Talk and Facebook at Gabrielle Kindler,
Gilmour and I have No Secret. Thank you for listening.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
Thank you,
Welcome to the Tupash Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
I am Gabrielle.
Speaker 3 (00:04):
I'm a former New York Mafia princess originally from Austria.
I am the mother of three and the owner of
Tupash Boutique and here with my beautiful co host Masella,
my daughter.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
Hello, I'm Marcella. I'm a dancer, choreographer, model and designer
for Tupash and I say whatever I want.
Speaker 5 (00:25):
My name is Cruz. I am a stylist. I also
own the Society Salon in the Design District and I
am a short, little Mexican with the big personality.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
What will they say next?
Speaker 5 (00:37):
Welcome to the Tupash Podcast.
Speaker 6 (00:53):
Where Scott really had to play a role and all
you is when I start, when they were taking me
off lives for taking.
Speaker 7 (00:59):
Me off the list, and Scott had to be like, no, no, no, no,
I promise you she can do this.
Speaker 6 (01:05):
And you guys all witnessed that that was the hardest time.
I mean, I mean y'all have And that's the thing
I do like to hear these stories because I wasn't there.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Just guys, can you talk about this? Is that the
that's the second transfer?
Speaker 8 (01:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (01:17):
Correct, Yeah, that is the one I think were there.
Speaker 6 (01:21):
When what I like to hear is all the little miracles,
so many there are. I I mean, I love all
also to like the ones we're like Brittany and Corney
all were like.
Speaker 7 (01:30):
Take to tell them about how y'all like took shifts.
Speaker 6 (01:32):
But like y'all like the times that you were eating
like like five days day.
Speaker 9 (01:39):
We would live and.
Speaker 10 (01:42):
Because Scott needed to be.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
One at a time.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Yeah, yeah, so you made a schedule. We had a schedule.
Speaker 9 (01:49):
It was like we would sometimes overlap.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
I would overlap a little, and then you'd have a
few nights by yourself, and then you'd overlap with the
next person and then you'd have a.
Speaker 11 (01:56):
Nights out in Phoenix, out in Phoenix.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
Probably to overlap. Sometimes it's not you're not just by yourself.
Speaker 10 (02:02):
It was a training perspective, right.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Just so you knew what was going on and catch
you up on like because in three days watch so
much could change.
Speaker 10 (02:09):
Because this was when she was in the ICU. So
every you know, and and obviously Scott was there too,
but Scott needed to be with the kids.
Speaker 12 (02:15):
Well Scott wasn't he was sick, he flew, he couldn't
go up well and then that was I felt sorry
for y'all because I didn't understand why he wasn't there,
Because I was like.
Speaker 9 (02:26):
Her was heartbreaking.
Speaker 8 (02:27):
I explained to her every I was about to say
every night, but honestly it'd be hourly.
Speaker 9 (02:33):
Yeah, you would have to explain to her like Babe.
Speaker 11 (02:36):
Scott did not he's he wants to be here.
Speaker 9 (02:39):
She wants to be here. He's sick, he is taking
care of the kids, he's holding it down.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
This was all around Christmas. Also, you have to understand
this Thanksgiving. I think I flew home on Christmas.
Speaker 9 (02:49):
Eve and so that part was hard. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (02:53):
Well, and then I couldn't see very well, so y'all
were trying to y'all were trying not to show me
right like that I couldn't see very well.
Speaker 9 (02:59):
Well, so you're they wanted me to tell her that
she was blind.
Speaker 10 (03:04):
And then and then I think you guys called me
and I was like, no, that's not happening. God is
not going to have her blind, Okay. All she wants
to do is see her children's faces.
Speaker 9 (03:14):
She is not going to go blind.
Speaker 6 (03:16):
I know, because like Amy would have to keep the
phone from me, and I would, you know how I
get like I get very I know, I was very
difficult to do, but.
Speaker 11 (03:22):
You're on That wasn't what it was at all.
Speaker 8 (03:26):
It was mostly just us wanting to comfort you, right
and let you know what was going on. And obviously
she's just come out of heavy anesthesias. She's been on
massive EMO for a month, which most people don't make
it off of. What is that similar to what you
heard about during COVID when people would get very sick,
they'd have to be it's like artificial lungs. And so
(03:48):
for most patients, if you're on ECBO, you know, two weeks,
that's pushing it.
Speaker 9 (03:53):
Yeah, that's the limit you want to get off. This
fighter over here.
Speaker 11 (03:58):
She was all brush teeth on that and striking our.
Speaker 10 (04:01):
Hair and doing making because I where's my makeup?
Speaker 11 (04:05):
No, dob't.
Speaker 8 (04:06):
So obviously coming out of that there is a level
of confusion and medication and drugs and all of these
things that that need to come together and.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
So well, and she lost time. I mean she lost time.
You know, she went in December second, I think, almost simber,
and then now it's.
Speaker 9 (04:25):
It took a while to convention.
Speaker 13 (04:26):
You had the surgery, yeah, you know, because you were
like I haven't had it, and we were like, no,
we've had it. No, no, no, no, when are they going
to do it? When they're gonna you know, you're not
speaking because you.
Speaker 7 (04:35):
Had to you'll had to like figure out what I
was saying.
Speaker 11 (04:37):
Yeah, I was like, no, it's happened, you know well,
And I.
Speaker 6 (04:40):
Think because at that time my breath was not satisfying
and so I didn't understand like you still fin and
it's because I had a lot of fluid like on
my lungs and which was really cool because doctor Toteman,
because I was like, I'm telling you this is something's wrong.
And so doctor Toteman, which was really cool.
Speaker 7 (04:57):
She she listens to.
Speaker 6 (04:58):
Me because she understood how and tuned I was to
my body. So she's like, all right, we'll do am.
I don't know what they did, yeah yeah, and she
was like, oh yeah, you have like all so they
had to drigg it like drill a hole and it was.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
New Years around, yeah it was.
Speaker 8 (05:15):
And then they drilled and begged me not to do
it though You're like, I please, don't, please don't. I
don't want to be in the enclosed and Maria, I
don't want to do it. Don't let them do it.
Speaker 7 (05:22):
Really, I don't remember it that way. And to do
the m r A or.
Speaker 9 (05:26):
To be in the enclosed like like austrophobic. And I
was like, babe, you're going to do it.
Speaker 7 (05:33):
And then they said I have the only chance mm hmm.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
And then they took but then they took me into
a room and they drilled like a hole in me
right to pull out the fluid.
Speaker 8 (05:42):
That was the second time. We did so many scans
at the at the beginning. At the first time, she
was still pretty out of it and she's begging me, please, don't, don't.
Speaker 9 (05:51):
Do it, don't and I can't.
Speaker 8 (05:52):
She's like, I don't want to do it. I can't
get enclosed in there. I don't want to do it.
Speaker 7 (05:55):
And we just I don't remember any of this.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
I mean, you don't have any memory.
Speaker 7 (06:00):
I don't. I don't.
Speaker 6 (06:01):
This is like the first time ever. But I will
say too, Amy got like the worship is what I heard,
because so I was this like just coming and everything.
Speaker 7 (06:10):
Sorry, I don't know. It all worked and.
Speaker 9 (06:13):
It all works out for a reason, you know.
Speaker 8 (06:15):
And I had the ability to I mean when it's
during the holidays, so I'm it was off work.
Speaker 9 (06:20):
I don't have children.
Speaker 8 (06:22):
They all need to be with their families during during
this time, and there was no there was nowhere else
I was going to be.
Speaker 9 (06:28):
You know, there was nowhere else that was going to be.
I just knew that.
Speaker 10 (06:33):
Yeah, she just got the angriest Sella.
Speaker 7 (06:36):
Yeah, yeah, I remember.
Speaker 9 (06:39):
There were moments when I was like, oh my gosh,
but didn't.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
I pull something out. I was so confused.
Speaker 8 (06:45):
Though, I mean, yeah, very confused. In the hospital staff
is like, you've got to get her to stay in bed.
You've got to get her to leave the tubes, you've
got to get her to whatever.
Speaker 9 (06:54):
And then she would she would chill out, and then
she'd be like, you've got to get them to take
this off, like you've got it.
Speaker 8 (07:00):
So the gare coming to me and tell me one thing,
and soel was coming to me and saying, you got
to get them to take this off of me. I'd
want to be able to sit up. I want to
be able to get out of bed. You literally couldn't
sleep at night because she would get up. She you
didn't when you were there, you were like, don't worry,
she can't get up.
Speaker 9 (07:15):
She's like sedated. She can't get out of it, and
I'm like.
Speaker 13 (07:18):
You want to bet yeh, She's trying to slide off
the bed and you're just trying to slide, like slither off.
Speaker 7 (07:24):
Because you were like you can't get to the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
It was like, all.
Speaker 8 (07:30):
She wasn't supposed to do any of those things on
her own for a very extended period of time, and
this girl's doing him like days after little Yeah, well
she's supposedly blind.
Speaker 10 (07:41):
Yeah, well that was the thing that we didn't really
touch on the blindness.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
We didn't know what she could see.
Speaker 10 (07:47):
We didn't know what she could see, and like they
pretty much told Scott like she's because she did go
in a long failure and all of those things. So
that happened, you know, when she was off the list,
right because they Scott had to prove that she could
get back on the list, and her body had to
prove that too by the lung function of her heart.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
And mainly like this was like hours, Yeah, this is
all happening.
Speaker 10 (08:11):
But but truly, I mean, you know, at one point
we thought she was blind and I will never forget
the first time. So like here's an example, you'd find
things to calm her and one thing that really calmed
her when I was there was she couldn't see Pride
and Prejudice the movie, but I would just play it,
and I mean, she knows everywhere everything to the movie,
(08:32):
so we would just play it over and over and
I think I'm watching it. She thinks she's watching it,
but she's not, and then I'll never forget. She was like,
can you please hand me my makeup back? And I
was like, and like all day, I was like, I'm
not going to give her a makeup back, because then
she's gonna know if she can't see it, you know
what I mean, I like trying to like and then
like one day, I finally was like, I'm just giving
(08:54):
her the makeup back.
Speaker 11 (08:55):
You know.
Speaker 10 (08:55):
So I handed to her and she starts putting her
makeup on, and then I'm like, she.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
What she can actually see?
Speaker 10 (09:02):
So it was gradually coming back, you know.
Speaker 6 (09:05):
She kept on putting those yellow socks on me.
Speaker 10 (09:09):
Me and Sola have a funny relationship because we like
to pick on each other, and so like like, yeah,
she hated these yellow socks.
Speaker 7 (09:16):
She's still like the ones that the issue the hospital.
Speaker 10 (09:19):
She always wanted her socks. But then I'd always take
them off and put her yellow sucks on just to
make her.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
Look down at like Dan, Actually it was the ugly ones.
Speaker 10 (09:27):
But that's guys with the humor, Like I think, you
just have to laugh your way through like serious situations,
and she's great at doing that too.
Speaker 6 (09:35):
We have fun together, like even in you know, the
in the ICU on my death bet, we have fun together.
Speaker 9 (09:41):
We do.
Speaker 13 (09:42):
We have to switch back and forth because it's it's
like it's healing to do both, you know, you kind
of just need to have that outlet. Well.
Speaker 6 (09:51):
And then that just shows how much love we have
for each other to be in a situation like that,
and to be so comfortable together in a situation like
and just you know, love each.
Speaker 7 (10:02):
Other in the worst plausible way.
Speaker 8 (10:05):
And that's that's also a testament to you, though, Selah,
because I feel like there are so many people who
who can't be vulnerable, who even around people that they love,
could not allow themselves to be cared for in that way.
And it is a level of bringing your guard down,
even amongst people that are like family.
Speaker 6 (10:27):
Basically right, But again, but allow me to bring my
guard down, you know, I mean, y'all y'all create this
environment for me to be me and love me.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
So I have a really important question about that, because
I think it's always to help someone in a situation
like this. Sometimes people go no, no, we don't need it,
or no we don't want, don't come or whatever. How
did you guys figure this out that you are really
becoming her like life?
Speaker 2 (11:00):
How?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
She says, because he never asked, That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 10 (11:04):
Well, and they usually don't want you docot.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
We would let Scott ask for our once she got.
Speaker 10 (11:09):
Married, and during this time it was all driven by drive,
respect everything.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
If Scott wants to do it all, then we'll set
back and send food or take care of the kids
or no, but he knows now like to reach out.
Speaker 9 (11:23):
Yeah, we're there.
Speaker 13 (11:24):
We went several days without knowing anything because he was
dealing with every the EGMO and all that stuff, and
we just had to be on standba and knowing we
cannot bombard him because he's doing everything he can.
Speaker 9 (11:36):
And he has a million people asking questions and I want.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
Scott had to learn. I think Scott learned like, oh
I do need to lean on them also, like they
are Sella's life's support.
Speaker 7 (11:47):
Also well that and he knows like that's what she that's.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
What she needs, and it helps him in the long run.
Speaker 6 (11:53):
I mean, I remember him, I'm saying, he's like I
think he got it when he got the flu and
and he just hated to do this to you guys
because it was during the holidays and Christmas eve and
he I remember I think he called Ashley and was.
Speaker 10 (12:08):
Just like, I was like, we need you. I was
like waiting.
Speaker 7 (12:13):
Already have a ticket, Like it.
Speaker 10 (12:17):
Wouldn't you want to help and you can't be there right,
Like that's why I'm start right and so but going
to that question, like the first transplant, you know, was
very different. And so I just have we just had
their children, I mean, because that's that's a great way
you can help them, not having to be worried about
their kids, you know. And I think that we're just
(12:38):
all like whatever we need to do, we'll do it.
We're there and were taking.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
Direct all hands on, or we can be hands off
and send And.
Speaker 10 (12:45):
I think we take direction from Scott unless we know
she's going dark, do you know what I mean? Which
doesn't happen often, but we know when it's happening, and
then we forced ourselves over to our house.
Speaker 11 (12:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (13:00):
I'll be the first to admit that when it is
getting too much, I will kind of close out because.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
And it normally involves a phone call of one of
us calling the other and like we were gonna comes
get munch, someone send out a random text that we're
bringing here.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (13:15):
Yeah, and then I'm like, of course, yes, but I think,
I mean in my mind, I mean, you know, there's
a lot going on, and I don't want to just
spew all of this on you, even though I know.
Speaker 7 (13:26):
That y'all would take it.
Speaker 6 (13:27):
It's just so yeah, and I'm I'm I'm not there yet,
but I am like, you know, because I am like
twenty eight percent and I'm on.
Speaker 7 (13:35):
This I'm in this weird place right.
Speaker 9 (13:37):
Now, living pattern.
Speaker 7 (13:39):
Yeah, and but I don't.
Speaker 6 (13:41):
Want it to be right like so I want to
still be living while I'm holding.
Speaker 10 (13:45):
So we're so that's why it's good.
Speaker 6 (13:46):
Like today we have today and we're going to see
each other and we'll go get dinner and you know, just.
Speaker 9 (13:52):
You know, grace.
Speaker 13 (13:53):
Yeah, anytime we get just been together is like the
most precious minutes truly.
Speaker 7 (13:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 11 (13:59):
I mean, we all have kids, well, we have kids too,
and husbands and whatever, but there's just a special connection
that there's nothing out there that I can compare this to.
Speaker 6 (14:13):
You know, well, I think in general, women in general
need that connection and not just be like a wife,
like like it's it's so important to be I love
being your all's best friend, and I mean like that
gives me purpose and I feel so special like that
I have you guys.
Speaker 10 (14:30):
And we so feel so special that we have her,
you know. I mean, like she's changed every aspect of
my life, you know. I mean there's there is not
one part of my life that she hasn't changed, truly.
I mean everything from like you were saying earlier, just
you know, oh I don't want to work out today?
Are you kidding?
Speaker 2 (14:48):
I Instagram?
Speaker 10 (14:51):
Oh my god, Like from the most basics to like
the most you know, like I said, like, I've had
a medical kind of crisis in my home else and uh,
we needed to find the best doctor, and the best
doctor was in Minnesota, and I didn't think a second
about picking myself up and moving me and one of
my family members there. I would have never done that
(15:12):
that easily if I hadn't had the experience I had
with Sea where we just picked up and went to Phoenix,
like it was like, no big deal, this is what
you do, you know, you just go And so it's
I mean, she's truly I think we could all say
just we're so blessed that God chose us to be
her friend friends.
Speaker 9 (15:28):
She makes all of us a better person.
Speaker 11 (15:32):
Without hands down, it's true, true.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
I can't I am telling you, I have said that
from the beginning. It's like I don't even know her
at all, but I do know her now and it's
it made a change in my life one million percent
her and I talk about it one million percent one
of her best friends. It's like incredible and I feel
(16:00):
blessed the guys, I hear well.
Speaker 6 (16:01):
I wish I could explain that from the flip side though.
The fact that you guys like care and love and
actually you know that gives me fuel and it shows
it is a testament to your heart and to your
soul for you guys to recognize that this is someone
that's hurting, but she's thriving and I want to help
her in any way. And I just think that that's
(16:22):
a beautiful testament to you guys, is that you see
you know, someone like you care, you know what I mean?
People I don't care, Thank you for carings.
Speaker 10 (16:34):
Just something else. We talk about a lot, which is
being curious versus really concerning, okay or being concerned, Like
there's a really fine line. And I think Sola and
all of us in all our lives have seen this.
You know, somebody goes through hard time like a divorce,
you know, you know pretty quick who just wants to
know what's going on? Who is truly and maybe they
(16:57):
don't even know. They don't need to do all the details.
They are just there to support you, you know, because
you're hurting, because you're writing yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
And we have our own separate like prayer warriors places
and we've built them to pray for Sea that aren't
even close to Selah that I don't even know her
really right, we don't have to text them or call
them the details. We can just tell them like I
need you to pray today for Sea and they're on it.
Whereas there's some people that want to know all the
details so that then they can go tell everyone else
(17:25):
the details. So you learn the nice balance of yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
Yeah, can I just I'm such a big believer in
the friendship and all that. I want one more question
about that, like when she goes dark, I want to
know those next steps you guys take, Like so you
give her that dark time for a little bit and
how long? Do I find it so important? I think
(17:49):
sometimes people don't know what to do. Yes, so I
feel like that give them a little guidance of what
did you do?
Speaker 10 (17:57):
What do you talk with each other? We probably all
handled it a little bit differently, honestly, I mean, and
we can always probably talk about even when we go dark,
because I think we all know everybody's different way to
go dark, you know, and like we probably treat each
of us a little bit differently. But for Selah and
me at least, I know it's crazy. But when she
(18:20):
goes dark, I have dreams and it's crazy, like we
can link it all the way back to well even
as soon as I start having dreams, I know what
kind I mean, it can just be just dreaming about her,
about the purple Oh yeah, I mean, I mean, yeah,
it is a good story. But you want me to
(18:41):
share that story. So when we at this point, this
was it's hard. I know, I'm trying to like put
it to where you can know where we are in
the process.
Speaker 6 (18:51):
So you know, well I think I was. Yeah, they said,
they say, oh they thought I was. What is it
a vegetable?
Speaker 7 (18:59):
Yeah it was.
Speaker 10 (19:00):
It was after lung failure for sure. So it was
after lung failure, before the second transplant, after lung failure,
and we had gotten it is kind of when Scott
was just so focused, like Brittany was saying, you know,
we couldn't get as many updates, which we totally understand,
and Scott sent an update that was really like just
praise for her heart, like like we have got to
(19:22):
get her heart, you know, say taking me off the list,
and yeah, she was off the list. And I just
had a moment which you know, and I just was
so mad, you know, I mean it is hard not
to get mad, you.
Speaker 9 (19:35):
Know, you go through a range of emotions.
Speaker 10 (19:37):
Yeah, and I was like on Marco, which we Marco
was our savior through this lung train, because.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
She did go dark, like let's get Marco like.
Speaker 10 (19:46):
It in yeah, you'll keep okay, So basically I'm on
Marco with them, which is like I don't know if
you know what Marco is, but it's like like.
Speaker 9 (19:54):
A video chess video check.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
It's texting, texting, but with the video, and.
Speaker 10 (19:59):
I'm like, I'm done.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
I'm done.
Speaker 10 (20:02):
I am going to turn on beaches.
Speaker 13 (20:07):
When you threatened the beaches, I was like, oh no, no,
and I was like, I'm doing it.
Speaker 10 (20:14):
I turn it on beaches tonight. I'm so mad. This
is what is going on, you know. And I couldn't
find beaches. I actually tried to look for it. I
couldn't find it. But that night I had this dream
and it was Salah coming home from the hospital and
she had a purple sweater on and I just saw
her come home, like I saw her come home. And
(20:36):
I woke up that next day and I texted them
and I was like, she's going to come home.
Speaker 9 (20:40):
I was just like it's gonna be I mean, it
was it was like, you know, as soon.
Speaker 10 (20:42):
As you lose hope, you lose everything, right, And God
knew I needed a little bit of hope. And so
the next day Scott. That's when Scott called and said,
I have the flu, and Nobela has the flu. So
I was the first one that got there. And I'll
never forget he was so sick and we were in
the hospital room. He was teaching me like everything that
(21:05):
I needed to look at, you know, to be sure
because he was going to leave for the first time.
Speaker 9 (21:09):
And you're checking oxygen levels, you're looking at a lot.
Speaker 10 (21:11):
But this was before and ya and so and then
before the train, before before we knew we had lungs,
and so.
Speaker 11 (21:18):
It was like December. It was the first of December.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
So she's the thought of like, like, that's what's going on.
And he gets the flu and yes, and mother and
her mom and they couldn't be at the hospital and
Joe Phil and.
Speaker 7 (21:31):
We had to have surgery. So she.
Speaker 10 (21:34):
Got back on the list that day or maybe like
right before. And I walked in and I looked at
him and I said, I promise you she's coming home.
And I was like, I cannot believe I'm saying this.
And I was like I saw her come home home,
and God is going to bring her home. And then
he left and I got on my knees and I
(21:56):
was like, listen to me, I just promise it's this man.
I remember visiting that this was my I mean, I'm like,
I can't even believe I just did that, you know,
I didn't even know how I did it. And then
four hours later, they got the call that there were lungs.
Speaker 6 (22:13):
Wow, and what do you know what sweater I went
home with? Obviously there's a picture of me.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
We need that picture. Oh my goodness.
Speaker 10 (22:29):
I think I bought it for you. I was like,
you're wearing.
Speaker 6 (22:38):
Ya wow.
Speaker 10 (22:41):
So yeah, when I know she's dark, it's weird. And
she does the same thing with me. It's like a
dream thing.
Speaker 11 (22:46):
Mine is a dream too, but it's not a dream. Actually,
God wakes me up in the middle of the night.
Speaker 13 (22:49):
It's usually like three am and the time that I
would never wake up, and he's like start brand and
I don't know, I'm a reason And it's usually kind
of you know, around the time.
Speaker 7 (23:04):
Usually I'll get it.
Speaker 6 (23:05):
I'll send out of text the next day and I'll say, guys,
I really need.
Speaker 7 (23:08):
So you're like already started.
Speaker 12 (23:11):
Wow.
Speaker 6 (23:12):
Well, and Brittany has like a direct line, like the
way she prays, and you definitely have a direct line.
Speaker 7 (23:18):
So I'm always like, britt.
Speaker 11 (23:21):
I know he answers.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Yeah. So and then when you have to dream, then
how do you guys get back because it's such a
fine line, like when somebody is go start Normally I.
Speaker 10 (23:35):
Don't really tell me first I call, there's a back chain,
there's a back channel, and then we decide who's gonna
call yeah, you know what I mean, and who's going
to approach it. And then it's normally like let's get
a game plan.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yeah, and it's gonna go.
Speaker 11 (23:47):
Like I'm bringing the Madeline.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
We'll see you, And it'll start with like one of
us will send a cryptic texts of like, oh my gosh,
I'm going through a really hard time and I need
to see everybody.
Speaker 8 (23:57):
So I'm like, but she's like me too, I have
blown in for lunches or yeah today, well anything, what
about the time what about the time that I be
bopped into the hospital in Courtney's like crazy bear hat
and cool.
Speaker 6 (24:17):
So I was doing photo foresis because we were hoping
I wasn't going to need a second transplant, right, So,
and I was I was not doing well, and these.
Speaker 9 (24:24):
Things take forever.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
You would be in there for hours, four hours, and
we took over, yes.
Speaker 7 (24:29):
And so Casey would always wear those big heads, you know.
Speaker 6 (24:33):
Yeah, And so I thought Casey and like I think
I thought like maybe Casey and Ashley were coming or
and so you'll both have these big heads on and
so it's you know, and I'm like, oh, and then
Amy takes her hat or the head off, and.
Speaker 7 (24:46):
I'm like, what's.
Speaker 6 (24:50):
So it's just again, it's the little things like that
that I just think, let my you know, my fire
kept me going through a long I mean again, y'all
have to work really hard for a very.
Speaker 7 (25:00):
Long period of time.
Speaker 9 (25:00):
To keep might not work though not.
Speaker 10 (25:05):
I mean, we're just again just so blessed to be
able to be part of the miracle, you know, I mean,
because that's really what it is.
Speaker 6 (25:11):
And I really wish we could write down like all
the little things like and again, sometimes a miracle can happen,
but you don't realize it's a miracle just yet until
we look at it in hindsight and we're like, oh,
so that's why you did that, that's our I mean,
just there's yeah, there's just there's little tiny miracles that
we should probably all write down, which y'all probably know more,
yeah than I do.
Speaker 10 (25:31):
I think we did write a lot of them down.
Speaker 11 (25:33):
But and then just you know, in general, like your life,
your whole life.
Speaker 13 (25:37):
Because you know, we talk about on the other side
of heaven, like you know, so it's gone to so
much on earth, and you know, God is blessing those
trials and everything.
Speaker 11 (25:49):
She may not see all of that. I mean we're
here talking with you guys.
Speaker 13 (25:52):
She may not see all the people that she's impacted
until that point, and it'll all be worth it at
that point, you know, even though this is hard, and
she would, I would, we would take this from you know,
her at any given moment. And but He's got a
huge plan and there's been there's been so many people's
lives that have been impacted because of her strength, her
(26:14):
faith and in his relationship with her.
Speaker 6 (26:18):
So and I'm I don't mind taking it on, like
I if if I don't see it, but like knowing
and when you guys tell me things like that, knowing
that I am influencing people to just keep going because.
Speaker 7 (26:30):
Life is hard. It is I mean, long transplant or not.
Life is hard.
Speaker 6 (26:36):
So I like being a little bit of a light like, Okay,
if she can do it, I can do it. It
gives me a little more purpose, gives this madness a
little more makes more sense.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
So the Duke, for instance, what what's the lung?
Speaker 11 (26:52):
Like?
Speaker 3 (26:52):
How low do you have to go before that?
Speaker 7 (26:55):
Yeah, I mean I think we're I don't. I don't know.
I think I'm close.
Speaker 6 (26:59):
So in December, I'm going to if if I don't,
if I'm staying stable like I am now, I will
see them in December twelfth. Uh, and that's they're going
to do some more tests.
Speaker 7 (27:09):
Do like more PFTs, like just see.
Speaker 6 (27:11):
Where I'm at. And again, like what my doctor Totemund always.
Speaker 7 (27:16):
Says is like, you know, don't show about your.
Speaker 6 (27:18):
Strength, like go in there and show them how you feel,
because I mean, like right now, you know I don't
feel too great. You know, I'm on avil and you
know I did like five treatments before we got here
like so but so but then again like I'm like this,
like you can't tell that I need one to oka
right well? And that's like doctor Toeman, remember, I mean
like she was like sit me home that day when
(27:41):
I actually went into a coma that night because she
was but she was just like be so truthful on
how you feel because I mean and I try to,
but I don't know how to. Like I don't know
how to, I don't know how to not not you know. So,
but so I'm gonna get there and I'm gonna try
to be I mean, I'll let the test kind of
show for itself. But it's like sometimes I contradict the
(28:03):
tests because like I'm blowing like a twenty nine, but
I'm also doing pull ups, you know, And it's just
like I just have to make sure they understand that
I do need them and that I am weet like again,
I'm ready for the table, but strong enough to survive.
I mean again that balance is where.
Speaker 3 (28:18):
It And then your heart since you had a heart
attack and they did the hard test, Yeah.
Speaker 7 (28:23):
Everything looks good.
Speaker 6 (28:24):
So I think they're like, I want you to just
look at my gall bladder. I mean they're like, it's
so funny that they I mean, you know, there was
one thing to my kidneys look really good, and I
thought this was interesting. I think I might have talked
about this before. But like some transplants, in order to
get it, if they have bad kidney numbers, they have
to have someone sign a thing that says, hey, i'll
(28:46):
give her kidneys if she needs them.
Speaker 7 (28:47):
So and I kind of was like, nobody wants you've
got the kidney stones too, remember where.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
I was like, if it helps SAT lose weight, I'll
give you.
Speaker 6 (29:06):
But yeah, so but thankfully I don't need a signature
for that. And so I guess again, I don't want
to say I'm waiting. I just want to say that
I'm living and we'll see.
Speaker 9 (29:17):
And I tried it.
Speaker 10 (29:18):
That's what we try to encourage her to, like, the
only person that can figure out this timing is God. Like,
it's the most complex situation, you know what I mean, No, Hue,
I mean, I just don't think it's anyone's timing, you know.
I mean we're so thankful for her donors. I mean,
like her donors are obviously like I mean, heroes, and
(29:38):
but God knows who that is, do you know what
I mean? And how this all plays in because she's small,
and it has to be the perfect person, you know.
I mean like there's just we can't And so I
try to say, we cannot focus on the timing because
there is absolutely no way any of us can figure
it out, you know. I mean, although I know that's
very hard for you to do.
Speaker 6 (29:59):
Yeah, well, I mean we all play like that's where
you all like, Okay, let's go over there, and.
Speaker 13 (30:03):
We can start to get kind of panicky, you know,
and be like why are these things not moving?
Speaker 11 (30:06):
Why are these people on calling back, Look, what's the deal?
Speaker 13 (30:08):
Why why is this paperwork being cogno and all this,
and we just have to constantly be like, it's not
in our hands, right, it truly isn't. And the day
that it happens, in the day you get, we get
the call is the perfect time, in the perfect place,
in the perfect everything.
Speaker 7 (30:24):
Hi.
Speaker 9 (30:24):
I'm Olivia Gooley.
Speaker 7 (30:25):
I'm one of the gossip girls here at Tupash Podcasts.
You can find me on Instagram at Liv's World and
if you need me, I'll be crying in my Bentley.
Speaker 4 (30:33):
I'm Marcella, co host of the Tupash podcast. You can
find me on all social media platforms, Marcellainary. You can
also find me on TikTok, Marcella roinary seven and I
say whatever the fuck I want.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
My name is CRUs Kaffer. You can find me on Instagram.
And that's pretty much it, and let's do some tequila
together on the next show.
Speaker 3 (31:01):
If you enjoy listening to our show, please follow tupash
podcast on all social media handles and tell all your
family and friends about it. And two Push podcast is
on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Facebook, and Twitter. Also don't hesitate
to leave us a review, comments, feedback, or ask us
any questions, and follow me on my personal social media
(31:21):
on Instagram at Gabby dot Talk and Facebook at Gabrielle Kindler,
Gilmour and I have No Secret. Thank you for listening.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
Thank you,
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