Ep. 248 Soft Eyes

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:07):
Let me finish. This is the first time I committed
a hate crime.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
Maybe they'll jerk my dick off for it, you know,
like something like that.

Speaker 1 (00:19):
Yeah, probably we've disgusted. I'm associopath.

Speaker 3 (00:26):
You are present my shit. Put any trash ship.

Speaker 2 (00:36):
You're a worst friend, the one to know why.

Speaker 4 (00:45):
You're all fucked up.

Speaker 1 (00:46):
Just look at the fucking problems to hang around with.

Speaker 2 (00:49):
Where's two four eight? It's like, sorry, you don't deserve it.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
The silent cast, we'll call it.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Oh yeah, well it's a moment of silence for who
died recently?

Speaker 1 (01:01):
No, it just doesn't exist. Oh who did die recently?
Someone died, right, Richard Simmons, someone in like the oh,
some finance guy. Never mind. I saw them do a
rest and peace thing on a CNBC This Morning.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
One more or the hint they hit Clinton hit list,
the hinting List, the hinting List.

Speaker 1 (01:22):
Okay, uh so we already talked about your Thanksgiving on
on the Patreon last week.

Speaker 2 (01:29):
Right, Yeah, it was balls. I was yours terrible. Oh
that's good.

Speaker 1 (01:34):
It wasn't terrible. It's just a frustrating. Man. Do you
do you welcome help a lot? It depends on what
I'm doing okay. Do you welcome help on something you
are more versed in than the person trying to help you?

Speaker 2 (01:55):
It just depends. So do you welcome.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
Help when you've asked, Hey, I don't need any help,
please just keep your hands out.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
I want to help. Then it means I want you
to go away.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
That's weird. That's weird that it translates that way. In
your house. No apparently means no, and that's a weird thing.
What I prefer is our fine family dynamic. Where I
said a couple of years ago, just after my dad
and everything, maybe last year my mom was just kind
of like, not doing it anymore. There's no reason too.
The family doesn't get together, meaning her extended family. So

(02:26):
she's just like, I don't I don't want to cook
it anymore. And I was like, okay, I'll do it.
I'll take it on. Then I won't do anything crazy.
We'll do small meals, we'll do like little you know,
size don't want to dinner, Well, we're not going to
do TV dinners. I'm not fucking living on cinder blocks
in my mobile home.

Speaker 2 (02:41):
Well no, it's just because it's your first time.

Speaker 1 (02:43):
My immobile home. If it's on cinder blocks.

Speaker 2 (02:46):
Oh it's still mobile. You can push it off the blocks.

Speaker 1 (02:49):
Any home is technically mobile.

Speaker 2 (02:50):
Then, yeah, hurricane around move homes all the time.

Speaker 1 (02:55):
I heard a joke about that, but it was some girl.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Man.

Speaker 1 (02:58):
I'll tell you what. My my comedy stuff is getting
jaded to chick shit because all I see funny. I
only see political shit anymore. And then the funny stuff
I see is stuff like Jen shows me on TikTok
or whatever.

Speaker 2 (03:11):
Oh yeah, like cats.

Speaker 1 (03:13):
No cats are okay. But also I don't need you
know what I need. I need a nice twelve second
cat video, not one of those TikTok compilations where it's
like three minutes long and it's a whole bunch of
cat videos. Just give me little doses, small doses of them,
because some of those cat videos fucking stink in the middle.
Oh yeah, dude, Like sometimes it's just a mew and

(03:35):
it's like, did you hear him? He said, uh, he said, pigmy,
It's like now, it just sounded like meal. Yeah, it
just sounded like mew. I like when they say like
curse words and stuff and you're like, oh, that cat
just used a hard r.

Speaker 2 (03:49):
Yeah, I love. That's like, there's a lot of cats
who say the N word. It's weird.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
Uh yeah there are, but yeah, that's all I see
is like, dad, joke, shit it and there was a
decent one. Let me play it for you if I
can real quick. I think I have it here.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
I was about to be a car crash.

Speaker 1 (04:13):
That's another video. I don't know what it was, only
because you said hurricane. Uh yeah, all right, here we
go fucking again dad, humor. I'm not sitting here going
like you a free one. Check this out?

Speaker 3 (04:28):
Hey, Why are hurricanes normally named after women? Because where
the strong ones were? Women in power?

Speaker 5 (04:37):
No, because when they come, they're wet and wild, and
when they go, they take your house in.

Speaker 3 (04:43):
Car just.

Speaker 2 (04:51):
Embankment.

Speaker 1 (04:52):
Fucking bitch. Wife. She just filed for divorce yesterday, right,
Joe Connie smash. She filed for divorce. But they had
already committed to Thanksgiving and they haven't. They decided not
to tell the family yet, so they're like, let's just
let's just keep calling, let's just shrive. And then the
wife gets her fucking because women are strong, and he's like,
you cunt, and he just runs that thing into an

(05:14):
oak along the side of two ninety five.

Speaker 2 (05:17):
Let's see how strong your skull is against the fucking
dashboard at ninety five miles an hour.

Speaker 1 (05:24):
To my Thanksgiving. It was a lot of It was
a lot of I'm working on this, so don't do
any don't touch my stuff, don't do There's a lot
of Oh, i'll help, I'll help with this, I'll move
with this, I'll do this. Oh no, i'll do this.
Hey hey, hey, hey, chill, step back, go ahead.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
How long did it take for you to yell and
just be like, got the fuck out?

Speaker 1 (05:47):
Oh? An hour? So not that long on the grand
scheme of it, But that was a lot longer than
I think I could hold I thought I could hold
out for. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
How long does did the whole ordeal take from cook
to to serving?

Speaker 1 (06:01):
Too long? Too long? Seven hours?

Speaker 2 (06:05):
Oh that's not bad. Uh yeah, thanksgivings an all day thing?

Speaker 1 (06:10):
Well no, because well yeah, but it started at like
noon is when I started doing this shit. Oh yeah,
I had started earlier, and I did technically, I guess
I pre chopped stuff the day before and all that shit.

Speaker 2 (06:23):
Anyway, Oh, it took like thirty six hours.

Speaker 1 (06:25):
I didn't fucking enjoy it. Yes, it did take thirty
six hours. It was it good at least hours? Uh? Yeah.
I brined the turkey like you did. I cooked it properly,
but it was so moist inside that it felt like
you fucking said your mother in law or aunt in
law or whatever it was said. I was like, is

(06:45):
this fucking raw?

Speaker 2 (06:47):
Did you let it rest?

Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (06:49):
Yeah, as long as you let her rest for twenty
minutes or so, you're good. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (06:52):
But but there were different things. When I would cut in,
there would be a lot of real, not pink, almost
red looking meat like yeah, real bunch of red stuff too.
I use that for the stew all right, but what's
it called?

Speaker 2 (07:07):
Did you do? You have one of those thermometers that
you shove in the breast.

Speaker 1 (07:11):
Not only that, I have the bluetooth one where you
monitor it.

Speaker 2 (07:14):
Oh so very well.

Speaker 1 (07:15):
But here's the thing. I got it to one sixty, right,
and you want it to get it to one sixty five.
So I get it to one sixty, I take it
out of the oven. I leave it on the oven
for fucking half an hour. Let it rest.

Speaker 2 (07:28):
Oh that's great.

Speaker 1 (07:29):
Well, yeah, it never went past one sixty five.

Speaker 2 (07:33):
Still one sixty five is the temperature where all that
was a criteria gets killed. Yeah, okay, so yeah, so
if you're so, the way cooking is explained, it's like
it's the amount of time versus temperature, right, So if
you cook something at five hundred degrees for a minute,

(07:54):
you can probably guarantee, you know, based on the size
or whatever, you're going to kill all the bacteria. You're
going to ruin the meat. It's going to destroy the
proteins and whatever. It's going to make it not enjoyable
to eat. So you can cook something at a much
lower temperature like one fifty five one sixty one sixty
five and just do it for longer, and that will

(08:16):
have the same effect as killing the of killing all
the bacteria and stuff. So that's why letting your meat
rest is so crucial, especially for poultry, because the bird
really is cooking. So even though it didn't go above
that one sixty five, the fact that it sat there

(08:37):
at one sixty five for an extended period of time
meant that your bacteria got killed.

Speaker 1 (08:42):
Oh okay, good, I was just concerned about my bacteria
getting killed, but I was still grossed out about it
in the moment so I didn't eat much. I had
one plate of things. I was also my stomach was
turned because I was just so angry, just the same repeat, hey, hey,
hey stop, just stop, just.

Speaker 2 (09:00):
Be maybe, Uh, it's not going to work telling your
mom to stop.

Speaker 1 (09:07):
Yeah, no, I've learned that over the last since Pat died. Honestly,
is what it was. It's it's she's what is it? Codependent?
But also whatever you would call someone who's like an
extreme caregiver, you know that kind of like oh I
need to do that, even if it's breaking your fucking
back to do it, and you know you're not going

(09:27):
to get satisfaction out of it. I guess you get
internal satisfaction, like you're not going to get the big
Oh my god, thank you so much for interrupting all
of my cooking. Oh I love it. Thank you for
ruining my stuff.

Speaker 2 (09:41):
Well, a lot of people, I think just don't know
any other way to be. It's just like you're so
stuck in your patterns, your behavior. There's like there's no escape.
You know. It's like my grandmother every year she would
say like, oh I'm not going to cook again. I'm
not going to do this again. You know this was

(10:02):
just this was too much for me for Thanksgiving, and
then at Christmas she'd be making a ham, you know,
and it would just always it would always be that like, oh,
I just don't have it in me anymore. But she
just couldn't not do it. It was just built in,
not even from birth. It's just like that, doing it
over and over that same pattern for years. It's really

(10:25):
hard to break yourself of it, even if you want to.
Did you hassle your grandma about the sides at least?

Speaker 1 (10:32):
Though?

Speaker 2 (10:33):
Oh dude, I was always like, motherfucker, don't even joke
about not making dinner next year.

Speaker 1 (10:39):
I like, when you I'm picturing you go, you go.
She said she wasn't gonna make it anymore. And she
says it to you to night before and then she decided.
You go into a room at five in the morning,
sort of banging pots and pants. Gab, damn dime, she
made a ham? You said for Christmas she would make
a ham. Yeah, ham is the I think I'm done
with turkey. I have to be honest with you, Okay, Well,

(10:59):
I think, damn, I think I'm gonna I think next
year I'm gonna do a chicken.

Speaker 2 (11:03):
Maybe like a chicken is good, chicken's easier.

Speaker 1 (11:07):
Yeah, ducks sucks, does it all? Right?

Speaker 4 (11:09):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (11:10):
I've had it a few times, but I've only had it. No,
that's correction. I've had it at Asian places. So it's
like it's not gonna be good. Oh wouldn't it be
really good?

Speaker 1 (11:21):
But like you couldn't really tell because it's like fried
or whatever and delicious sauces and shit like.

Speaker 2 (11:25):
That on it. Well yeah, but it's like it's always
really chewy. It's like a gamey meat. And the one
time I ordered it at a nice restaurant, I was thinking, like, Okay,
I'm ordering it at this fancy place. They all know
how to cook it. It still sucks, you know, It's
still like it just tastes like duck tastes like the

(11:48):
darkest part of a chicken thigh with next to no flavor.
It's just like a really like even the flame, like
the flavor on the outside didn't make its way to
the meat at all. You know, it's just like a
very like gray taste.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
Yeah, that's gross. I don't want that. It's too Yeah,
it's too earthy. Yeah, yeah, no, I don't want that.

Speaker 2 (12:11):
Well, you could make you can make a peacock that
might be a fun bird to We have random peacocks
that walk around here, really, because the grounds for sculpture
not so close over there.

Speaker 1 (12:24):
Jen used to work there and it was all about
like one of her jobs was rounding up the peacocks
when they get out.

Speaker 2 (12:30):
That's weird.

Speaker 1 (12:31):
Yeah, don't have fucking peacocks. You're gonna have some Haitian
immigrant living in a Venezuelan stolen apartment complex eating the birds. Yeah.
It feel just throwing everything like aliens.

Speaker 2 (12:43):
Also, the prettier the animal, the more shitty the native
country usually, Like I don't know where a Tucan comes from,
but I assume it's a dump.

Speaker 1 (12:54):
You know, I would picture Costa Rica dump. Ye, well, yes,
you're right. Let's yeah, let's talk about it this way.
New York looks beautiful when you look at a skyline,
total dunk.

Speaker 2 (13:07):
I oh, you mean like New York State, not the
goddamn city.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
No, New York City. The skyline is very beautiful, especially
when it's lit them at night.

Speaker 2 (13:15):
It's beautiful. Okay, I'm saying so animals that are native
to beautiful places, those places are shitholes. I wouldn't say,
a big concrete jungle shit onto the harbor or the
bay or whatever is a is a beautiful thing.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
Okay, mom, before you cut me off, let me finish
my analogy. That's what she does too. I'll walk in
and be like, ah, you know I cause you need
to go to an emergency room.

Speaker 2 (13:41):
I go.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
I didn't say anything about anything New York. The skyline
is very beautiful, like I picture Costa Rican beaches to be,
and yet the depths of New York City are a
kind of a shithole. And I assume Costa Rica the
depths of Coasta Rica kind of a shithole. That's what
I meant. I just meant like that. I wasn't comparing

(14:04):
like pigeons are really ugly because they live in a
beautiful sit like, not like that.

Speaker 2 (14:09):
Oh no, no, no, I was. I was just saying that
you're robot for thinking that buildings are pretty.

Speaker 1 (14:19):
No, no one's ever enjoyed architecture before.

Speaker 2 (14:22):
Nope. Yeah, not even the Romans or the Egyptians.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
They should replace Notre Dame with a mobile home.

Speaker 2 (14:29):
Oh dude, they should replace Notre Dame with an actual
midget and a green uh get up outfit. Yeah, fucking
watch him beat the shit out of Jake Paul. Uh uh.

Speaker 1 (14:42):
Yeah, So I had that, and then the next day
we went to a grandmother's house and we had a
bunch of other shit to do.

Speaker 2 (14:49):
Did anyone come to your house for Thanksgiving? Or was
just you your mom and your girl?

Speaker 1 (14:53):
Just me and my mom and jeny.

Speaker 2 (14:55):
That's how a lot of pornos start.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
That's good. That was good. Thank you for that, because
I didn't understand what you meant by the robot thing.

Speaker 2 (15:06):
I'm just kidding.

Speaker 1 (15:06):
I did. I computed it.

Speaker 2 (15:09):
Oh you did and calculated.

Speaker 1 (15:10):
I calculated and computed it in my brain.

Speaker 2 (15:13):
That's gay.

Speaker 1 (15:14):
I have an IBM. What was the fucking one deep Blue?

Speaker 2 (15:18):
Deep Blue? That's Jeff Bezos.

Speaker 1 (15:20):
No, no, Deep Blue is the IBM computer. I think
the first one that beat a chess grandmaster?

Speaker 2 (15:26):
Yeah, yeah, right?

Speaker 1 (15:27):
Is that what it was?

Speaker 2 (15:29):
They were a go master or something like that.

Speaker 1 (15:31):
Y'all. Motherfucker's ever seen Deep Blue?

Speaker 2 (15:32):
See though, I like the part when ll Cooljay wins
at the end.

Speaker 1 (15:38):
Deep Blue is a chess computer. Yeah, I know everything.
Thank you. Like any kind of cultural reference, I'll probably
get that. That's just me. You should Jeopardy I could
never I had. Oh man, I'll tell you what. No
one looks fucking smarter than when you're sitting at Jen's
grandmother's house and there's just three columns that it's like,

(15:59):
it's like something you don't know.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
And then it's like.

Speaker 1 (16:03):
Nineties movies and they're like, why the fuck is this
one jeopardy and then you know world leaders of blah
blah blah. I don't know that shit. And it's like,
uh like porn former porn stars that have died, and
I'm like, oh, goh fuck, oh Nanny. It's just like,
how do you know all these names? He's so smart.

Speaker 2 (16:21):
I'm like Jesse, Jane, Yeah, last category two letter words,
no if if uh so. So you went to your
your girl's grandma's the next day?

Speaker 1 (16:37):
Yeah, And then the next day I went to a
restaurant with my mother's family for what was supposed to
be Thanksgiving, and I calamari and fucking had a burger later, like,
I took it home with me.

Speaker 2 (16:50):
If the if the Hopee Indians could have had burgers
and fucking fried squid, I'm sure they would have eaten
that instead of a fucking rotten turkey.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
You fucking engines want some of this fucking breddit octopus tentacles?
We had octopus too, it's squid an octopus.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
Oh that's cool, that's all right, what's better? Squiter octopus?

Speaker 1 (17:13):
I you know what the squeek. I don't like eating octopus.
I'm a pussy because I know how smart they are. Yeah,
but I know I don't like that either, And that's
why it's sad. That's why I just cut the heads
off of pigs for fun.

Speaker 2 (17:27):
Yeah, because they're fucking dumb. They age shit.

Speaker 1 (17:29):
I think they're real smart, right now? Do they live
in shit? Yeah, but so do people in Florida or
pigs not very smart and smart? All right, Studies have
found they're smarter than dogs and even three year old children.

Speaker 2 (17:46):
Well yeah, both dumb things.

Speaker 1 (17:48):
Yeah, okay, all right, Well I remind you this thing
rolls around in its own ship.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yeah three year olds, dude. Sometimes three year olds will
paint with shit.

Speaker 1 (17:58):
No, not if they want to keep their fingers.

Speaker 2 (18:01):
They won't. Well, yeah, you're gonna raise them like a
good little uh ge hoti.

Speaker 1 (18:06):
Oh good little muslim fucking fingers sold you ship in
my house again.

Speaker 2 (18:12):
I'm gonna read from the Koran every day if you
ever ship?

Speaker 1 (18:17):
What do you think of this? Lady?

Speaker 2 (18:20):
Are you sharing your screen?

Speaker 1 (18:21):
I'm about to all right, parking lot lady? Why is
this here?

Speaker 2 (18:26):
Why is this a McDonald's.

Speaker 1 (18:28):
Get the fuck out of here? Oh? Hold on, okay,
see how this is blocking me? Very annoying.

Speaker 2 (18:36):
It's McDonald's. Get away from my car.

Speaker 5 (18:39):
Come on, really, you boy, get out of your car.

Speaker 1 (18:43):
Boys son, go somewhere crazy.

Speaker 5 (18:47):
No, I'm not crazy. Get out of your car now. Yeah,
get your McDonald's. Get out of your car.

Speaker 2 (18:56):
Yeah, we're at McDonald's. What do you want me to beat?

Speaker 1 (18:59):
Yeah? Imagine if you he's eating fucking burger king in
the McDonald's parking lot, he'd look even weirder. How did
you get that? They make it for you in the
back if you ask? Real nice, yo, I was gonna
get a big mac, but y'all gotta n whoppers back there.

Speaker 2 (19:13):
Yo. This chick looks like if she did her makeup
and put on like a red dress with a high slit, Yep,
she'd clean up real nice. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (19:22):
Oh yeah. Currently she looks like a mother who's about
three messages from God away from drowning her kids in
a tub.

Speaker 2 (19:30):
Uh, but.

Speaker 1 (19:32):
Solid rack decent?

Speaker 2 (19:34):
Oh dude. Oh yeah, she definitely goes to the gym
like three times a week and takes selfies in the mirror.

Speaker 1 (19:40):
Stupid face. But I've seen girls on TikTok with like
no nose who turned themselves into something fuckable.

Speaker 2 (19:47):
Oh yeah, dude, they draw nose.

Speaker 1 (19:49):
Yeah, they just draw a nose on their face. Fucking uh.
All right, I want you to assess what you think.
I'm gonna play this a little bit more. What would
you what can you even do in this situation?

Speaker 2 (20:00):
Is she there doing that?

Speaker 1 (20:02):
Yeah? Like, realistically, I understand, get a car sculler to
death fucker, you know, eye hole and whatever, but like
you know, aside.

Speaker 2 (20:09):
From that, probably just sit there and record her.

Speaker 1 (20:12):
Yeah, what happens if she starts getting physical?

Speaker 6 (20:15):
Uh?

Speaker 2 (20:15):
What kind of physical?

Speaker 1 (20:16):
Punching?

Speaker 2 (20:21):
Punching the car? I have to get out and restrain
her ass.

Speaker 1 (20:24):
Is that what you do? Restrainer?

Speaker 2 (20:26):
Oh yeah, dude. I grab the tire iron restrainer down
to the ground and keep her head restrained and her
fucking neck and restrainer some more until the authorities could
come and restrain her into the fucking cemetery.

Speaker 1 (20:40):
I just grab a hold of those fucking double d's
and go, you're not leaving, ma'am. Then you get charged
with ray pomp ah.

Speaker 2 (20:46):
No, dude, that's just an essay.

Speaker 1 (20:48):
This fucking country's broken. Everything is raped nowadays.

Speaker 2 (20:53):
No, dude, it's just assay, our asshole.

Speaker 1 (20:57):
Get.

Speaker 3 (21:00):
Come on, come on now.

Speaker 1 (21:03):
I'm oh a, nips are hard. You're looking on your phone.
I'm not sure if you could see that or not.
Nips are hard and see.

Speaker 2 (21:09):
I mean yeah, I like how she's saying, come on now.
It's like an open invitation, like she's got video proof. Like, look, officer,
I think it's pretty clear she says, can be to fuck.

Speaker 1 (21:20):
Is she having a mental break?

Speaker 2 (21:22):
Uh, she could be a bad day and bad day,
or maybe she's just got a period.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
I'll tell you what though, if my wife was like so,
I pulled over the van today and I got out
and I screamed at this black guy in the parking
lot in his car, and I kept insulting him and
calling him names. I called him boy A few times.
I would go, are you out of your fuck mind?
What are you kidding? Me? Her husband, Jamal, I mean
really like that's uh, that's too much comfort. That is

(21:51):
too much comfort. Not the fact that he's a black dude.
But you know what I mean, this.

Speaker 2 (21:55):
Could just be her normal, you know, state of mind.
This could just be she always.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
And that's too much comfort, ma'am. You need to get
your shit together because you were gonna get stabbed.

Speaker 2 (22:06):
I think maybe she's you know, like so it's like, uh,
maybe she's pleasant, and then like you just you tick
her off a little bit and she explodes. But I
was watching A Ninety Day Fiance last night, Like they
had this reunion, this five day reunion episode where like
several of the couples lived in a house together and
then every day they did like a like an eight

(22:28):
hour shoot with like interviews and all this stuff. But
it was a there's this one couple. Angela. She's a
fucking lunatic. She's like probably almost seventy years old by now.
She's been on the show for years. Yeah, she's really old.

Speaker 1 (22:44):
And she's married the American. His name, she's married Tola. No,
she's married to Michael Oh okay, but he's from Nigeria
and Okay, so his name is Higgbulla. Yeah that's his uh,
that's his African name. But he goes by, She called Michael.

Speaker 2 (23:01):
I don't know how to say that, you're Michael. Well, yeah, so,
like they've obviously had their ups and downs. I think
it's been pretty obvious throughout the series that maybe he
took advantage of her a little, but he did, like
he did enter into relationship and stay with her. It's
like document it for years. It's like he lived with

(23:23):
her for years. You know. It's like I don't think
he was faking actually being in a relationship with her,
but yeah, Angela has convinced herself that their whole relationship
is a sham. And so every single scene for this
five day reunion thing, we watched every single scene, like
Angela will be like laughing and joking with one of

(23:45):
the other cast members and then Michael will say something,
or she'll see him smile, or she'll see him do
anything out of the corner of her eye, and she
will just snap. She turns into this lady times a
thousand is like screaming, like like calling him names like
a pussy and a bitch. You fucking like just streaming

(24:07):
so loud, and every all the other cast members are
like just Jesus fucking Christ, you know, like what do
we do, and from pretty much the whole five days,
everybody is just kind of like frozen the whole time.
And I feel like people who act that way, people
who are just like they act cool, then they fucking
go bizarre berserk, and then they act like nothing happened,

(24:31):
and they do this all the time. Those people get
through life and and like they it's not that they
don't realize that that's unacceptable behavior, but it just becomes
kind of normal for them, and it's just like and
then they're fucking crazy, you know, like that, and that's
that's how you have, like so many I think emasculated

(24:52):
men with wives like this, I guarantee you this bitch
is married.

Speaker 1 (24:57):
You know she is, well yeah with that min event,
she's got to be o. She is recently divorced, Yeah,
fucking loose recently yeah, like yesterday. Yeah yeah.

Speaker 2 (25:08):
Uh.

Speaker 1 (25:09):
I would say, you know what it is we have
We lost that thing and it's a good thing, truthfully,
at the end of the day. We lost that thing
where if someone punches you in the mouth, your behavior changes,
you know, is the way it used to be. I
feel like there was a lot more of that. There
was a lot more people felt there were consequences, and

(25:30):
that's I'm not advocating for that. I'm just saying I
think as we've softened as a society, especially around things
like violence and this, and that people are more willing
to take these chances because they think, oh my god,
like you said, they've gone their life. This is how
I talk to people. It's totally fine, blah blah blah
blah blah. And they'll continue to go on until a

(25:50):
video is made of them. But then the victim complex
kicks in too, where I don't know what I did,
I got put on the internet. Why, I was just
having a bad day. Yeah, but you freak out.

Speaker 2 (26:01):
I mean, that's what the that's Oh, that's one of
the things with Angela too on ninety Dight Fiance. She's
a permanent victim right everything, everyone, anybody who disagrees with her,
any yeah, anybody in that show when they stick up
for Michael, she immediately just jumps down their throat and
she's like, you don't know, you don't understand. He's this bad,

(26:22):
he's that bad. He's fake, he's phony, he's lying, Like
just doesn't even let him talk that Like it's always
like you don't understand me. You don't know the truth.
Uh yeah. That's like a constant thing for these people,
where where they try and justify this terrible behavior by,

(26:43):
like you said, being a victim.

Speaker 1 (26:45):
Yeah, oh all right, let's.

Speaker 3 (26:46):
Play this, so ready to fight club this shit, let's go.

Speaker 2 (26:51):
No, No, she took oneself defense class at the type
of Jim.

Speaker 1 (26:57):
Once she starts yelling pussy, adam and stuff like that,
it's like, lady, you're I understand. No one should get
out of the car and hit you for you calling
them a pussy.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
Someone might Oh yeah, okay, there's plenty of fucking douchebags
out there.

Speaker 1 (27:12):
If you get trashed at a college dorm party, you
should not get raped. You might. So you know what,
let's not Let's work on changing the things like this
guy sitting in the car eating McDonald's, which apparently he
shouldn't be doing, and she'll work on not using racial
slurs and calling them a pussy.

Speaker 2 (27:34):
Maybe she just hates drive throughs. Maybe everybody should eat inside.

Speaker 1 (27:38):
You know what. I bet it was. Let me keep
letting it play. But I think at one point he
said like, uh, place your order and go or something
like that early on before she probably was taking too
long to order and he beeped at her, which is
a dick move.

Speaker 2 (27:53):
Yeah, it is just wait, yeah.

Speaker 5 (27:55):
All right, pussy, you're a fucking pussy a degree, go
to school to schools.

Speaker 1 (28:05):
By the way, this guy's an idiot too. Like, don't
don't get me wrong, I'm not standing here like, well,
this cause has a nice upstanding gentleman. He's a retard
as well.

Speaker 2 (28:13):
Yeah, I fucking hate Like do she ask guys like that?
Who It's like, oh, check out this one, check out
this line, this, this will get her. Watch this. Where
do you see her face when I say I am
when I said pussy pussy? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (28:32):
See, I hate that too, unless it's a good joke.

Speaker 2 (28:35):
So I sometimes they can do jokes. That's not a
good joke though, that's something we said in fourth grade.

Speaker 1 (28:40):
I apologize. Know you're right on that one hundred percent,
But also I think it's also it's almost like you
can't say that was a good joke. You have to
make the joke. It's almost like a nickname, you know,
you can't give your you can't. Hey, I'm calling my
shot here. This one's gonna be funny, because then if
it flops you might as well drive that car into
a fuck wall with your McDonald's.

Speaker 2 (29:02):
Yeah, and your fucking wife and daughter in the back.

Speaker 3 (29:06):
You're eating McDonald's good, you see versus your car?

Speaker 2 (29:11):
What are you gonna have a destruction?

Speaker 5 (29:13):
Derby make a million dollars a.

Speaker 2 (29:17):
Year pissing contest for who's the biggest douchebag but Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 (29:24):
So again he took it another step further. The I
make more money that in less money is being discussed.
The first one to bring that up is douchebag to me. Yeah,
And I always say, like the first one to have
your car, you lost. Yeah, unless we're talking like a
Fast and the Furious race, then you didn't lose potentially.

Speaker 2 (29:46):
Well yeah, because the way they return the winner is
who doesn't crash into a building or a satellite dish
on the way to the end.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
Well, it's actually who has a contract for the next
movie is normally how they determine it.

Speaker 2 (30:00):
I think Paul Walker had a contract for the next
movie and he didn't win.

Speaker 3 (30:04):
McDonald's. I was getting a coffee at McDonald's.

Speaker 1 (30:07):
You that's bye bye.

Speaker 5 (30:12):
Take a million dollars a year. No, I'm not eating
at McDonald's. I was getting a coffee at McDonald's.

Speaker 1 (30:19):
You that's.

Speaker 4 (30:23):
Take your eyes on, get out of your cars.

Speaker 2 (30:30):
Go home, Miss Washington, take your ass home. Come on, Washington.

Speaker 1 (30:34):
I know he stinks.

Speaker 2 (30:35):
Man, she looks more like missus Lincoln.

Speaker 1 (30:38):
Black dudes are so funny, but when they're not and
it falls flat.

Speaker 2 (30:43):
It hurts. Yeah, black dudes are funny. Black anime guys
often not funny.

Speaker 1 (30:50):
Yeah, was that a question? No?

Speaker 2 (30:53):
No, no, I'm saying like, there's two there's two kinds of
black guys. There's black dudes and then there's black guys
who like anime.

Speaker 1 (30:59):
There was this hot girl in collage, right, fucking weirdo.
I didn't know her name. She was this perfectly shaped
black chick, like a square, tiny waist, big ass, you know,
wore gothy clothes. Why did she wear goth clothes? Which
obviously I like, you know, my thing, But why did

(31:21):
I like that? Or no, no, why why did she
do that? What kind of guys was she into?

Speaker 2 (31:27):
Fucking guys with plaid pants and spikey mohawks.

Speaker 1 (31:32):
Probably, yeah, only Korean dudes.

Speaker 2 (31:35):
That's weird, right, that's a weird thing. But yeah, that
makes sense that she was one of those black anime chicks. Yeah,
that's one of those, Like, if you're trying to catch
Korean dudes, black anime chick is like the it's like
that crab cage of the Boston Harbor.

Speaker 1 (31:54):
Yeah, that's what I was thinking too.

Speaker 3 (31:56):
Get your ass out of your car.

Speaker 5 (31:58):
Are you gonna post this because you look like a
pussy right now?

Speaker 3 (32:02):
Pussy with your.

Speaker 2 (32:03):
Kind of light against her at the beginning, and I'm
kind of on her side thousand percent.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
I flip flopped on this. Fuck that guy. I'm sure
he did something, do shee? I'm positive whatever it was
laying on the horn behind her, screaming something whatever, fuck him?
Good on hurt now again, going back to the other examples,
she shouldn't do this, she could get shot in the head.

Speaker 2 (32:29):
Oh oh, I thought you were gonna say she shouldn't
do this and then give me some follow up because
or like what she should do?

Speaker 1 (32:36):
Oh no, I wouldn't do this.

Speaker 2 (32:38):
She shouldn't do this. But what she should do is
fucking pull her pants down and spray shit all in
this guy's window.

Speaker 1 (32:47):
That would be the best Internet video ever.

Speaker 2 (32:50):
They could be out there and be up there with
the fucking cat playing the keyboard.

Speaker 3 (32:56):
Degree go to school to school. Well, I'm putting it off.

Speaker 1 (33:05):
I like that there, I'm looking it on the internet
voice she does.

Speaker 2 (33:10):
I like usually anytime someone mocks another person, totally.

Speaker 1 (33:15):
I hated this woman.

Speaker 2 (33:17):
Yeah, yeah, my favorite mocking is Trump. I don't know
what I said. I just like the way he's got
his arms like a t rex, you know, like all
curled up, like he's got cerebral palsy. That's a good clip.

Speaker 1 (33:30):
I like when he did it for Ted Cruz, the
same way.

Speaker 2 (33:33):
He did the What did he spoke? What did he say? What?
What words did he say? For Ted Cruz?

Speaker 1 (33:38):
My wife, the black Eye? My dad killed Kennedy? Oh okay,
he really put everything on Ted Cruise.

Speaker 2 (33:45):
Huh yeah. What was it that his wife cheated on
him too? Is that what he said? No?

Speaker 1 (33:50):
No, come on, don't.

Speaker 2 (33:51):
Be his wife.

Speaker 1 (33:52):
He says his wife was ugly? Is that his wife
was ugly? His father killed Kennedy and potentially Ted Cruise
was the Zodiac killer.

Speaker 2 (34:02):
Well the killing Kennedy thing could actually help Cruise.

Speaker 1 (34:07):
Not in his party, not in his party, it wouldn't.

Speaker 2 (34:10):
Oh that's weird because I thought they fucking hated Kennedy
because he was a fucking lib.

Speaker 1 (34:15):
I don't think they really like, uh, the CIA right
now either though.

Speaker 2 (34:19):
Oh but dude, the CIA did all those cool things
like what like uh, they couldn't say save those hostages
and grenada, so they had to call the Marine Corps
to do it. Oh yeah, yeah, that was really cool
at that time.

Speaker 1 (34:35):
They did that, cool stuff, cool stuff. I got a
video here for you. I don't know what the fuck
this is, Okay, this little girl. It happ looks like
the start of a Japanese horror movie. This little girl's
having a fucking spas attack. And I don't know if
you're gonna be able to hear the quote from that
the people are yelling. I will read it to you afterwards.
If not, Okay, So it's just this this little black girl.

(35:00):
She's got long braids and she's stomping on fucking products
at Walmart. Here, maybe what are so av It's thirty
six seconds. I'll let it just play through and then
we'll talk. I'll explain to the audience and whatever afterwards. Hey,
we got an advent calendar for the cat and the dog,
just because Jen wanted to give them little treats. Every day,

(35:21):
like we're not celebrating it religiously. It's kind of a
cute idea. There's different treats inside for each one that
is cute. We should get one for our cat. We
missed the first two days already, so I guess I'll
got to eat those ones. That's the rule you had.
You know, you should make Deonta eat them.

Speaker 2 (35:38):
Now, I don't know. He's got his own event calendar.

Speaker 1 (35:40):
No, no, we can't have any much treats. They're my treats. Yeah,
you buy them his own dog one and make them
eat that.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
No, I buy him a reptile one. It's got like
a meal worm and then like a cricket frog leg.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
All right, let's play. Oh, she's throwing produce.

Speaker 2 (36:06):
No one cares about. No one ever buys those breads. Gruss. Okay,
I've always wanted to do this. Wice girls live in
my dream.

Speaker 1 (36:21):
Hold on, hold on this. The lady is about to
say it. Okay, see if you can hear it again,
I'll read it. Okay, So don't touch her, don't yell

(36:42):
at her, don't yell at her, don't touch her. She
could be the next president. One lady shout it in
the background there.

Speaker 2 (36:48):
Oh, that's unlikely at this point. I mean, it's already
she's got a tarnished record, she's already viral for fucking destruction.
What is this?

Speaker 1 (36:57):
Why are these people just watching it? Well?

Speaker 2 (37:00):
I mean it's really the next president, That's true. It's
really hard to like intervene with someone else's kid. Man,
It's like you really don't want to cause more problems,
like if you touch somebody's kid, and then it's really
like it's a worry. You know. I feel like if
I was an employee, I would just walk the fuck away.

Speaker 1 (37:22):
Employees, I kind of get that.

Speaker 2 (37:24):
I do.

Speaker 1 (37:25):
There are a lot of there are other people around
the shopper, shopper, I'm walking the fuck away or you
know what the but say this, say she throws that
bottle and it breaks and it cuts my leg or something?
Am I allowed to curb stomp this little girl now?
Or what?

Speaker 2 (37:38):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (37:38):
Yeah? Game on? I really like I understand, like, if
she's thrown shit around, I totally get it. And I
understand logically from your point of view, why get involved
in a fucking potential lawsuit? Why do that? I get it?
Walk away? Someone's got to do something at some point.

Speaker 2 (37:53):
Yeah, her dad. Yeah, like that. The black guy who
came over at the end, right.

Speaker 1 (37:58):
No, that was another guy because he was shouting at her.
Don't tell her the woman was shouting at him. Uh,
don't touch her. Blah blah blah, you don't.

Speaker 2 (38:04):
That's just because she's a white woman and he's a
black man. Definitely, she has authority.

Speaker 1 (38:11):
Why boy, why is no one doing anything? Why doesn't
anyone do anything anymore? It feels like I just feel
like someone should step up in that case, and this
guy did. You're right, yeah, but.

Speaker 2 (38:24):
Soon, Yeah, took took twenty seconds, but yeah, someone stepped up.

Speaker 1 (38:29):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (38:30):
I think it looks like a couple of people are
actually intervening.

Speaker 1 (38:33):
Uh we talked did we talked about this last week? Right,
about defending I know, I realized I never finished my story.
But that's okay, what story? No, it was from last week? Yeah, yeah,
yeah it was I told her years in the past,
but it was.

Speaker 2 (38:48):
Uh.

Speaker 1 (38:49):
We talked about like defending your kid right and standing
up for him and when they're right.

Speaker 2 (38:53):
And wrong, Like.

Speaker 1 (38:56):
How would you if your kid was getting bullied? How
would you go about stopping it? Schools contacted it's still happening.

Speaker 2 (39:08):
Well, that's the thing, is, like, it is this this
Your question assumes a lot, right. It assumes that me
and my family were all the exact same people, and
it assumes that everything in our lives are unchanged. Yet
somehow there's this bullying problem. Right. Maybe there's like a

(39:31):
kid from a Stephen King novel written into my son's
school for for a few weeks, you know, and then
all of a sudden it's it's uh, you know, it's
terror in the hallways. I guess that's possible, but I
feel like, really, what your parenting strategy needs to be

(39:52):
is to be planning for this stuff all along. You
can tell on your kids, like, first we of school,
what kind of kid they're going to be. I mean
you might you might tell yourself like, oh, well here's
here's like an example of what I'd like to see

(40:15):
more of. But it's like they fall into these roles
and they rarely change. So it's like, if your kid
is popular with the class in kindergarten, probably going to
be that way for most of school. It's rare that
a kid will just be like well liked and well
regarded among their peers for a while, for a whole semester,

(40:39):
a whole year, and then it changes out of nowhere.
It's it's because it has a lot to do with
the child, how they socialize, their disposition, how they handle criticism,
their emotional intelligence, if they how they look, you know,
if they can defend themselves. All this place into it, right.

(41:01):
So pretty early on I kind of realized, like, oh,
my kid seems to be really friendly with everybody. You know,
he's got a lot of friends. He's friends with boys,
he's friends with girls. And that was weird because I
was not popular, especially in those younger grades I was.

(41:21):
I was bullied in like second, third, fourth, fifth grade.
You know, it wasn't n till middle school where I
kind of just like faded into the background most of
the time. But my kid, like it was consistent where
it's like he was well liked and we never really
had to deal with bullies. But when there was bullying,

(41:44):
and when it was reported to us, like it was
usually other kids, my kid would tell us like, oh,
there's this one kid and a lot of people are
mean to him, or there's this one kid who's always
causing problems and they're always getting sent out of class
and they're always saying these things. So it's like you
see these patterns, right, Like there's kids with behavior problems

(42:05):
who probably have bad home lives. Then there's kids with
probably bad home lives also, or you know, maybe parents
who don't care as much and those kids are socially
awkward and there's not as much intervention, there's no probably
less communication. So it's like we set our kid up

(42:26):
for success from the beginning. So it's like we were
on the lookout for bullies and we were we were,
you know, thinking of like, oh, what do we do
if things get really bad? But I think what the
reality is is if you are not able to pass
on certain social skills, or if you've got you know,

(42:46):
unfortunately cursed with an ugly ass kid or something, or
like you know, like that's how kids are, you know,
like they're going to pick on kids with disabilities and
speech and bad elements and ugly, weird you know, unique
faces or whatever, and that stinks. But those are the

(43:07):
kids who actually need the most help in that area.
I would say if for some reason, like that bully
just showed up at my school and he singled out
my kid out of nowhere, and for some reason, my
kid didn't feel like learning jiu jitsu and all his
social skills and everything were enough to or talking to

(43:27):
teachers and me like if none of that was enough
to help, and like, let's say I couldn't get a
hold of the parent because the school's not going to
give you the parents information even if you report something,
you know.

Speaker 1 (43:40):
That's the question do you contact the parent first?

Speaker 2 (43:43):
That's so then well, that's the thing is like I
would probably find that information on Google. I would probably
involve my son and ask him like, Okay, well have
you seen this kid's parents? What's what? What? You know?
What if the consequence.

Speaker 1 (43:59):
ACKed does he look like he owns a gun? I'm
just kidding.

Speaker 2 (44:02):
I'm just yeah, I mean that's that's I mean, that's
that is a concern. Yeah, I mean, it's like it's
more about like one time the wife had an issue
with one of the parents at a field trip and
one of the parents said something like under his breath,

(44:23):
and then my wife was like, excuse me, what'd you say?
And the guy was like, oh, why don't you ask
your kid? And she's like, what the fuck are you
talking about? You know, and then the guy just like
took his son by the hand and started like power
walking away, and my wife is like, hey, did you
say something to my fucking kid. She's like yelling across

(44:43):
the parking lot. You know, this is after the the
field trip had ended, and so my wife went right
inside and she's like, that guy over there, I think
he just cursed at my kid or something. I don't
know what he said. He said something to my son,
and then I confronted him about it. He just walked away,
ignored me. I was yelling for him. He just ignored me.
I want to know what happened. You know, my wife

(45:03):
just like took action instantly, you know, with the parent,
and then the parent blew her off. So what's she
going to do? Chase him down and act like that
woman at McDonald's. No, she went and talked to the school.
I am trying to remember what happened with that. I
don't know if I think that they I think that

(45:24):
they either said that that guy couldn't go on field
trips anymore or what, because he basically he's told the
administration that it didn't happen, and like it was very
obvious that it did that something happened. So he like that.
That was enough for them to be like, all right,
well you're not going on field trips anymore. So it's
like it's just like, what are you going to do

(45:48):
past that? At a certain point you have to just
move on, right, But if someone is actively bullying your kid,
I would say probably going to the school first is
the better option. You don't want to get involved with
other parents, just because the child's behavior is more than

(46:12):
likely a reflection of the parent, right, and so you're
probably going to be talking to a brick wall. It
makes more sense to speak with somebody who can actually
enact some sort of discipline, you know.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
Yeah, yeah, I don't know that was more serious. I
want you to just say we're going to rape the
guy or something. No answer.

Speaker 2 (46:38):
Well, I mean, you know you'll be a parent one
day and you'll understand why in depth analysis is worth
a shit. Yeah, but not just chatting with on the thing.
I just wanted you to tell me something funny like this.
You ever see this guy now, It looks like he's

(47:01):
just spraying water on his head.

Speaker 1 (47:02):
Okay, so what he's actually doing is oh good, Yeah,
So what he's doing is he's picking these open wounds
on his face and spraying ninety percent rubbing alcohol.

Speaker 2 (47:17):
Oh, to clean them.

Speaker 1 (47:19):
No, just because he likes it. He just thinks it's cool,
like a cool thing to.

Speaker 2 (47:23):
Do a betting. He's on crystal mats.

Speaker 1 (47:27):
I'm not. I don't know, but I don't totally disagree.
It is a kind of a cool thing to do.
Oh my god, he's getting so much rubbing alcohol in
his ear. Hope thankfully. I think evaporates off real quick.

Speaker 2 (47:39):
Yeah. Yeah, alcohol is like a quick evaporator. Dude, do
you ever boil it?

Speaker 5 (47:45):
No?

Speaker 1 (47:45):
What isn't that what they did at the Boston Marathon?

Speaker 2 (47:49):
Oh? No, No, they put it a pressure cooker.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
I got a question. How did they get those pressure cookers?
How did they do it? They weren't an electric pressure
cooker right one running at the time, unless they had
some sort of battery source. I'm just gonna say it wasn't.
I don't know for sure, but I'm guessing they don't

(48:12):
have batteries. So then what kind of pressure cooker was it?

Speaker 2 (48:17):
How? Well?

Speaker 1 (48:18):
I mean, there's two types. There's the type I'm in
so over There's just.

Speaker 2 (48:21):
So many ways I can think to do this. You
hook it to a battery. Sure you could. You could
get a hot plate, put it on a hot plate.

Speaker 1 (48:29):
Well, remember it's in a book bag moving around, m okay,
and the hot plate also you would need the battery
for so you might as well just get the.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
Yeah, just attached to a not You probably don't even
need a whole car battery. You probably just use a
six vault lawnmower battery.

Speaker 1 (48:43):
I yeah, I was thinking the same thing, but I
would I would think even a little bit. I don't
know how many vaults is your.

Speaker 2 (48:51):
Normal lawnmower battery is six vaults? If it can turn
over a three hundred cold cranking amp engine like a
which is a riding lawnmower engine, it can definitely power
a pressure cooker for probably hours.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
Well, I don't mean to sound dumb. Are lawnmower's internal combustion?

Speaker 2 (49:12):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (49:12):
Yeah, So then doesn't it just have to create a spark?
It's just a spark plug. That's what the electric does.

Speaker 2 (49:19):
No, I mean, yeah, but it's it's got a battery
and it's got an alternator, just like a car.

Speaker 1 (49:25):
Right to create that spark and then after that you're good.
The car doesn't just do that. The car powers all
the other electronic devices in it. But a lawnmower doesn't
have that alone. I'm just pointing out, I don't know
that you need that big of a battery to create
the spark.

Speaker 2 (49:40):
You're, well, you do, because it's not just the spark.
It's got to turn. Yeah yeah, so when yeah, like,
it's not just the spark if you're sparking, but there's
no compression happened or not compression. If you're not pumping
gas into the cylinders, then what's there to spark?

Speaker 1 (50:02):
Right, So then it's so then it's not just the
spark plug. It's also like a guess pump as well fuel. Yeah,
it would fuel.

Speaker 2 (50:08):
It would be a fuel pump and the actual engine
itself because the starter has to turn. It has to
take the force of the engine and turn it over.
It has to crank the engine. That's what starter does.

Speaker 1 (50:21):
And it does it does that electronically. It turns down.
It's not just the gas comes in. The combustion is
the initial turn the first that's how that's how a
diesel engine works. Okay, yeah, then then that uses glow
plugs so yeah, and then that uses compression also, So
you have the diesel which is flooded the cylinders and

(50:42):
it's under immense pressure. And then when you hit the starter, yeah,
it just hits the glow plugs. The glow plugs ignite
the diesel. The diesel expands, and that expansion is what
gets the engine cranking. Okay, all right, that makes sense.
That makes sense.

Speaker 6 (51:02):
Jesus Christ, he's got it.

Speaker 2 (51:16):
I bet you. This is his dad's car. It's not
even his car that he's doing this ship in.

Speaker 1 (51:22):
That that guy is currently sitting in the parking lot
of McDonald's as his wife is outside the car screaming
at some black guy. He's the guy in the driver's seat.
That's what it is.

Speaker 2 (51:35):
Behind every woman screaming at a McDonald's drive through, there's
a man spring rubbing alcohol and his open source.

Speaker 4 (51:41):
Al I'm bugging.

Speaker 1 (51:52):
You can really see he's cranking his neck there.

Speaker 2 (51:54):
Hut You think that that's not a vein? That's the
fucking like what is that? It's like the tendon or whatever.
That's like the white car, you know, the white part
of the neck. Yeah, I just don't know why lulls.

Speaker 1 (52:18):
Now here's the thing. Here's the assessment I'm gonna do.
You're right, it definitely feels like meth.

Speaker 2 (52:23):
Right, Uh, it's gotta be that, or you know, like
ketamine or something.

Speaker 4 (52:29):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (52:30):
Ketamine would chill you out more.

Speaker 1 (52:32):
It feels like meth. Not a luxury car, but a
decent looking car from the inside is my assessment of
It looks like, you know, it's fine, it's not a
total shithole. The back has stuff in it, but it
looks like presence because I saw a kitchen aid mixer
back there that's like three four bills.

Speaker 2 (52:48):
It's cleaner than my car.

Speaker 1 (52:50):
Yeah, mine do all right. He's screaming. He screamed. Decent
teeth actually for a meth Yeah, if you were to
say that, and I don't even see any fillings right,
and haircut rush haircut. Yeah, I was gonna say. He
looks kind of like a He looks like Bradley Cooper
an American side a little bit. Yeah, So I'm not
denying this is definitely math behavior, but the signs don't

(53:13):
seem like math. Maybe do you think this is an
early trip for him?

Speaker 2 (53:18):
Yeah, maybe this is just a first time.

Speaker 1 (53:21):
The first time Mean tried math. He ran into target,
started ripping his neck open and spraying fucking alcoh on
it this. I mean, there is so much mental illness
in the world, and I like to watch it from afar.

Speaker 2 (53:35):
Yeah, I'd like to know what this guy's illness is.
It's probably maybe it's just because the rams lost. Is
it an OC is it O C D at all?
I don't know. This doesn't seem like OCD is. I
don't see it. I don't see him. He's clicking the
lock back and forth.

Speaker 6 (53:53):
Craggling, craggling.

Speaker 4 (53:57):
Oh yeah, that was good.

Speaker 2 (54:08):
I like the way he said that, Oh your girl
was his daughter.

Speaker 1 (54:25):
I don't know, but it really fucking bothered me. I
didn't know why he was doing this. I think probably
he was just like making a present for his girlfriend.

Speaker 2 (54:37):
What's the present? This is just a song he's working on.

Speaker 1 (54:40):
Oh okay, all right, that's pretty cool. Then I'll give
him that.

Speaker 2 (54:46):
What was that? Look? Hold on?

Speaker 1 (54:49):
Oh all right, check this out. I'm gonna play this
for you. I don't The problem is we got a
welt seven more minutes to fill and I have nothing
else to talk about. Would you do anything for Black Friday?

Speaker 2 (55:03):
Oh? Man, I bought here. Let me show you what
it was.

Speaker 1 (55:06):
It a good deal. I saw a Twitter thread, some
girl posted fucking target Jack the price of something up
literally one hundred dollars from seventy five dollars to one
hundred dollars. The day before Thanksgiving it was seventy five,
and then on Black Friday they were like two hundred
dollars or twenty five dollars off, and it's like, what

(55:28):
suck my balls? Right? So would you get? I bought
literally nothing.

Speaker 2 (55:33):
I bought the director's cut of Midsummer Oh.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
I'm actually going to get that virgin where'd you get that?

Speaker 2 (55:42):
Wal Mart?

Speaker 1 (55:43):
I'm good. That's a nice case. I like that.

Speaker 2 (55:46):
Yeah, check it out, dude. There's like straight up porn
in the little book, like check it pussy.

Speaker 1 (55:50):
They got pussy in there.

Speaker 2 (55:51):
Yeah, dude, there's little drawings of these guys fucking each other.

Speaker 1 (55:54):
Oh the pussies and stuff too. Yeah, this pussy's okay,
I said, guys fucking each other, which dudes like that.

Speaker 2 (56:01):
Look at all these guys fucking each other and oh.

Speaker 1 (56:03):
Okay those are that's but they're not fucking each other.

Speaker 2 (56:06):
They're just yeah, yeah, yeah, they're fucking dude, they're fucking
sticking in vagina. Okay, good, Uh, you didn't get nothing
for Black Friday.

Speaker 1 (56:18):
Dude, I got nothing. I got nothing at all. I
induced shit. I looked at deals and stuff and I
was like, there's nothing I really fucking uh needed.

Speaker 2 (56:29):
Again, that's how you know you're approaching middle age. Black
Friday is for the young and the old. That's it.

Speaker 1 (56:36):
I am tens of thousands of dollars in credit card
debt and I love spending money. And there was nothing
I looked at on Black Friday where I was like,
you know, I might as well get that nothing, nothing
at all.

Speaker 2 (56:51):
Well, that just means you're becoming a man. Why, that's
just because there's nothing that makes you happy anymore.

Speaker 1 (56:59):
Yeah, yeah, it's not wrong. I talk to my friend
Megan today who works with me, and I remember that
I made upset when she first started at that place.
I remember she was so excite, Oh my god, this
is a great job. It's so fun, she gets to
travel this that Oh my god. And five years later
she got put on one of my projects that I'm

(57:21):
working on and I'm like, hey, just so you know,
this project's a fucking shit show, and she goes, I
don't care. I have one foot out the door anyway.
This chop sucks. I was like, you know what, that's
I saw the collapse of a person job wise at least.

Speaker 2 (57:35):
Yeah. Yeah, it's like they they rotted her soul. They
turned her into one of the Orcs. Are the Orcs
born or made? I don't know how would you make them?
I don't know. Do you take a person you put
some black paint on him?

Speaker 1 (57:52):
No? No, no, no no no, I don't think. I
don't think that would be it.

Speaker 2 (57:57):
Yeah, I think they're probably born.

Speaker 1 (57:59):
It's a shame.

Speaker 2 (57:59):
I can't.

Speaker 1 (58:00):
I don't want to play this because it's visual and
I don't want people to miss out on it. But
this dude, okay, all right, so I'll fast forward a little.
They made this costume, right.

Speaker 2 (58:11):
Looks like the Neperbylegon.

Speaker 1 (58:14):
Yeah, that's the one, the Nepper. I just I don't
want to even dance around possibly saying the wrong thing,
so I'm just not gonna really.

Speaker 7 (58:22):
Awesome if you haven't figured it out yet, this is
the DeMorgan on Stranger Things has always been a favorite.

Speaker 1 (58:30):
Very cool costume.

Speaker 2 (58:32):
You've got the head that opens up like a pussy lips.

Speaker 1 (58:34):
Yeah, not one I've ever seen, but that's all right.
I'm hoping to see more in my lifetime.

Speaker 2 (58:41):
One day you'll fucking you'll be up close and personal
with a what do they called a petunia?

Speaker 1 (58:46):
Yeah, petunia, that's it.

Speaker 2 (58:49):
Well, who's that bit you drew pussy's as flowers, Virginia
Georgia O'Keefe, George Georgia O'Keefe. Yeah, she drew all those
pussies their flowers adds flowers. Yeah, she drew the droopiest pussies. Man.

Speaker 1 (59:01):
We went to Salem this year and there was this
exhibit it was about I only said that because we
saw a Georgia O'Keeffe one there one year, but uh
fucking we went to the museum and there was one.
It was called like No Borders, and it was like
this Syrian born refugee designed this art thing to experience
what life would be like if there were no borders,

(59:23):
if countries didn't exist, and we could all live as one.
And it was a fucking tait pen. It was a
playpen with fucking dodgeballs on the floor and the idea was,
fuck you slowly moved the dodgeballs with your foot to
replicate what it feels like to uh move slowly across

(59:44):
the globe. It was such horseshit.

Speaker 2 (59:46):
Fuck you.

Speaker 1 (59:47):
I got another art story after this black guy finishes
telling us why white people are fucking clueless.

Speaker 7 (59:52):
Okay, and one of our kids just happened to look
exactly like one of the characters, so we could not
pass up the opportunity like them we had And.

Speaker 8 (01:00:03):
This took a left turn that I wasn't expecting.

Speaker 1 (01:00:06):
So the black guy's doing the commentary on.

Speaker 2 (01:00:08):
Do you see the child in the middle, Oh, that
looks like a kid in blackface.

Speaker 1 (01:00:12):
Oh that's because it is.

Speaker 2 (01:00:15):
Oh that's weird. I wonder why I would do that.
He doesn't look like that one pause made him thin
or whatever. The other kid wouldn't be great if.

Speaker 1 (01:00:22):
That was the one that looked like if they were
convinced that was the one. And if we just throw
a little hole and ash on his face, maybe some big,
bright red lipstick, he'll look just like Mike from Stranger
Things or whatever.

Speaker 2 (01:00:34):
Due his name is, Okay. I hate to keep on
bringing up nine eighty fiance. There was this other completely
crazy fucking woman on there, bat shit insane, and she
went to Africa, I think also to Nigeria or some shithole.
She met her man for the first time she met
a blind guy, and I knew. I think she had

(01:00:57):
a fetish for disabled people actually, but as a story,
but she was like a real haggard looking woman. She
was like a farm lady. She was like in her
late late thirties, early forties. She had just had like
dark circles under her eyes and wrinkles and just like
a really like flat, rumpy body, no makeup. She just

(01:01:18):
looks so tired, you know. And she was fucking nuts.
But I remember looking at her and being like, oh
my god, that's like one of the fucking worst, Like
she just looks awful, you know, she just looks so bad.
I can't imagine she ever looked good. And then my
wife was like, you know, she kind of looks like
Mike's wife. And I was like Mike's wife, the Indian woman.

(01:01:42):
And she's like, yeah, yeah, let me show you a
picture again, and she's like I'll jog your memory. And
I was like okay, yeah, And then she showed me
and instantly I knew what my wife was talking about.
The eyes, the nose, the hairline, like all these things
matched up. But on the Indian woman, I was like,
oh shit, like she looks good, you know. I mean

(01:02:04):
I realized, like that you're racist. I am the white woman.
She was just born the wrong race, Like she has
all the features of the one race. She had like
the same everything of the one race, but then she
got stuck with white skin, you know, and that's that's

(01:02:24):
just it's just I just imagine, like you've seen white chicks. Imagine, yeah,
you've seen albino black people before, Like.

Speaker 1 (01:02:35):
First off, I have, and it's terrifying.

Speaker 2 (01:02:37):
But it's it's just it's like it's like waking up
to a mouse in your face. You know. It's just
like the worst thing you can imagine. Yeah, and yeah,
that that's like that's what I discovered with that woman.
I was like, oh shit, you know, like so maybe
the parents have a little of that. Maybe this kid
actually does have all the same feetatures, nose, lips, love

(01:03:03):
of kool aid. Maybe all of it matches up perfectly
with the black boy from Stranger Things. And it was like,
they're right, you know, who are we to judge?

Speaker 8 (01:03:14):
And this took a left turn that I wasn't expecting.
I thought the costume was great. I said, why the
costume is fantastic? Then I said, who is this nigga.
I can't even.

Speaker 2 (01:03:28):
Blame the kids.

Speaker 8 (01:03:29):
So man, two, you gotta blame the adults because you
just set up your kid for failure. And look at
this guy. He knew something was up. He said, what
the fuck is you doing? Anytime I see situations like this,
I don't even get mad. I just chalk it up
to the fact that whoever approved this as the adult
is just ignorant.

Speaker 1 (01:03:50):
Boo woke boo get mad, angry black guy, that's what
boo wokeness.

Speaker 2 (01:03:59):
Yeah, dude, yeah, that's like. Did you watch the Anthony
Jesselnick special.

Speaker 1 (01:04:04):
No, I saw the couple. I've seen the clips that
have been going around and where he was ripping people,
and I saw some of the some of the stuff
about Tony Hinchcliff, who, uh the kill Tony guy, the
guy that said the Puerto Rican joke at the.

Speaker 2 (01:04:17):
Yeah, I know who he is. I like kill Tony.
I think it's funny.

Speaker 1 (01:04:20):
I actually don't. As much as I like comedians and
I like the guys on it, I just I don't
love it. I should give it more of a chance.

Speaker 2 (01:04:27):
I'll say that. Yeah, I'm not a huge I think
Tony Hinchcliff is actually kind of insufferable. He's kind of
just like.

Speaker 1 (01:04:34):
I would agree. But I feel the same way about jessel.

Speaker 2 (01:04:36):
Nick, right, but but he's like, but Hinchcliff is super funny, right,
Like that's that's the thing. It's like, I would never
want to hang out with that guy. He seems like
just like a total prick, but he's so fucking funny.
And jessel Nick, I think if you I get the
impression that he's probably a cool enough dude to hang
out with, but yeah, his persona is a douchebag, then

(01:04:58):
I wouldn't want to hang out with that guy at all.

Speaker 1 (01:05:00):
Yes, to me, jessel Neck and Tosh are the same
guy except Tosh, but Tash is the opposite to me,
Like I would want to hang out with Tosh.

Speaker 2 (01:05:11):
Just like Van Wilder. Tash is like if Van Wilder
was alive.

Speaker 1 (01:05:15):
Sure, yeah, yeah, I agree with that. So why is
this is it? Oh? Here's what I will say. As
much as I don't like jessel Neck, I think his
ego is a little higher than it should be because
it is such a good writer, like as a writer,
the structure of his jokes, I just don't like his persona.
He is a phenomenal writer, though I'll give him well,

(01:05:35):
I kind of don't like his persona either, But that's
why I like his stand up is because the same
reason I like Toash, I don't really like his persona,
but I like his stand up.

Speaker 2 (01:05:45):
It's like, I love that they embody a character for
the whole routine. I like that they seldom break that
that elusive or illusory wall, you know. I like being
entertained like that. Think it's fun. Joe Para is another
one who he plays like a soft spot.

Speaker 1 (01:06:04):
I love Jen and I love Joe. You've never watched
his full stand up. I just like watching three four
minute shorts of him doing stuff. Have you ever seen
that fucking guy who cooks recipes from sixteen hundred or something?
Oh yes, yeah he's and he's had on Joe Para
like two or three times, and really so funny because
Joe Para, who is a very funny comedian, it's just

(01:06:27):
doing his dry nothing really, no no real substance to things,
just kind of but he's talking about cooking a grilled
cheese from sixteen oh two. It's great.

Speaker 2 (01:06:37):
I love it.

Speaker 1 (01:06:38):
I like that out he's cool.

Speaker 2 (01:06:39):
Yeah that and then that's What I like about it
is too is it's a character. You get to watch
the character. It's all like borat too right.

Speaker 1 (01:06:46):
Nathan Fielder, Oh dude, I fucking love Nathan Fielder. Yeah, yeah, same,
you know, see, not really because they're sketches. I was
gonna say Tim Robinson, and he's not. He's actually like
a pretty cool guy from the interviews i've seen him,
like just kind of laid back and whatever.

Speaker 2 (01:07:00):
So no, enjoy his stuff, but the rest, yes, you
get the point. But anyway, the Jesselmec special, I enjoyed it.
I think it was probably his best. I haven't seen
I think I've only seen two and he's got four,
so I haven't seen all of his shit, but I
like this one better than Polligula and the other one

(01:07:21):
that it was on Netflix. So he had this one
great joke. It was just like you said, the structure
is so great. It was what did you say, I
fucking hate wokeness or something? And then he waits for
the audience. That's the one going around My impression of
a Joe Rogan that I was on the other side

(01:07:42):
of the house when I heard that, and I fucking
like guffalled out. Loud. I thought that was really funny.

Speaker 1 (01:07:48):
I also, yeah, I don't know. My big thing is
in a lot of the comics, I listened to say
the same thing, and I probably get the same thing.
There's supposed to be somewhat this sense of like loyalty
among comedians, uh, and they don't like like trashing other comedians.
And he was big on like when they were calling uh,

(01:08:12):
the Legion of Skanks guys Nazis, Jazzlneck was big like
book those guys blah blah blah. Now the Legion of
Skanks is a Puerto Rican and two Jews. I understand,
you know they can be Nazis. They can, yeah, but
they're not. Okay, has proved that. Uh and that other
one too. Who's the that he actually got the I
told you it started popping up in my timeline, which

(01:08:34):
makes me rethink what I like and what I don't like.
This handsome truth guy. He is a actual racist, not
like a cutes like oh, I'll allude to it. No,
he like you know, and were calls cops the N
word stuff like that. And they finally booted him from
fucking uh Instagram, Yet Zuckerberg was allowing it for a

(01:08:56):
long time. They go around shouting racist stuff and whatever,
but they do it like west they do it like
Westborough Baptist Church. Everything's legal, their paperwork is in order,
they are allowed to be here. I don't know. That
is one where it's like, like racism can I'm sorry,
it can be funny. That kid wearing that blackface is funny,

(01:09:17):
but like when you see actual racism and the stupidity behind,
like real racism, it's just embarrassing that people think that way.
I'm not well, I'm sorry. Agree.

Speaker 2 (01:09:29):
Yeah, that's kind of what I think happened with wokeness
in general. So I think that the idea of being woke,
like I heard Jessamick say this thing too on an
interview where it's like the original woke and I remember
it from that song by Childish Gambino Stay Woke. I
think it's Redbone as the song. But yeah, the original

(01:09:51):
like colloquialism meant like keep informed, like be be knowledgeable
about what's going on, and then it bec came more
of like a shorthand for more left leaning kind of stances, right,
And that's fine, that's just kind of what happened. But

(01:10:13):
like the what was I gonna say, where did I
start with that? Oh, Jessla Nick had mentioned how that
was the original definition. Oh and now it's like when
people say woke, they they I don't think they really

(01:10:34):
are meaning the same thing anymore. Right, It's like when
you say, like you say, like woke this, or someone
is woke, It's like it just is just such a
shorthand it doesn't give you. It's just only a surd
to it, right, It's just only a slur now, So
it's like you can't even derive any sort of substance

(01:10:58):
of it. So it's like it just like if you
it's kind of like saying blm, right blm, like the
or nazi or nazi.

Speaker 8 (01:11:10):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:11:10):
Yeah, it's it's kind of just like one of these
words that's just lost all meaning because of how it's
been just so carelessly thrown around and applied to so
many different things. It's just like I kind of I
kind of whenever anyone says like, oh, that's just woke,
it's kind of cringe now, you know. It's kind of like, dude,

(01:11:32):
I feel like that's the kind of shit my fucking
dad probably says. It's like, oh, it's woke. That's more
woke stuff. It's I don't talk to him about this shit,
but I imagine that's what he's thinking. You know.

Speaker 1 (01:11:42):
Yeah, but all of that is cringe. All of it
is cringe calling. You know when when conservatives used to
call liberals snowflakes and now liberals have taken back snowflake
and they are used it is douchey both ways, boys, Yeah,
well ringe you both ways.

Speaker 2 (01:12:01):
It is. I feel like it's kind of it is,
but I feel like it's kind of like how how
I joke before, Like oh, if we all just say
the N word and you know, nobody cares, then who cares?
You know, It's just like it doesn't mean anything, you know,
like we just have to agree, like all the good guys.
We all have to agree, like we're all good guys.

(01:12:22):
We know, like this word is valueless, and if you
see anybody using that word in a derogatory way, we know,
like as the good guys that they're the bad guys.
But if you give into that, right, it's like I'm
not a Nazi. I'm not an N word with a
hard R, Like you can't call me that. Only I

(01:12:43):
can call myself a Nazi with a hard eye, you know,
like all that identity shit. You know, it's just like
it really is just a waste of time.

Speaker 1 (01:12:52):
Yeah, oh it's yeah. Now, sometimes people can flate. I
don't even know where I'm going with that one. I
apologize hard and hard eyes. Yeah, we're gonna wrap this
right now.

Speaker 2 (01:13:08):
It's soft eyes, right, it's a soft eye not see.

Speaker 1 (01:13:12):
Yeah, very rish friend.

Speaker 2 (01:13:14):
I'm Matt. I'm confounded. What what is it? Is it
a soft eye or is it just like a long
e sound?

Speaker 1 (01:13:22):
You know, I don't want it's all grown up it. But
I'm really gonna miss you guys when the show's over.