Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan Carson
Hey Happy Campers! Camp Counselors is a good natured podcast hosted by your favorite fake camp counselors Zachariah and Jonathan. Here at Camp Shady Birch we love the great outdoors in theory, but we’d rather spend our time making friendship bracelets, spreading camper gossip, keeping our heads in the clouds, and avoiding archery. We know we would make great camp counselors minus the fact that we know nothing about camping. So grab your sunscreen and bug spray because things are about to get campy.
Episodes
This week at Camp Shady Birch, we’re recapping Hilary Duff’s Lucky Me Tour. Then we are investigating a mysterious church fire the night before a Utah wedding. We also get into a daddy running a record-breaking mile while pushing a stroller. Go daddy, go! Then we rant about razor burn, Zachariah's rolled ankle, and so much more.
This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.
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In this mini episode we are reading listener submitted stories about a scary Little Cesars encounter, a coworker who is VERY close with her sibling, and surviving a category four hurricane on vodka and juice boxes.
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Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Sponsors:
➜ Go to REVOLVE.com/CAMP to shop and use code CAMP for 15% off your e...
This week we are talking all things edging! Our lawn, our garden, and then some!! Then we’re unwrapping the undercooked chicken amusement park filled with roller coaster grills and a Kia dealership caught taking parts from a customer’s car. OMG can you believe? Plus so much more, obvi.
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In this mini episode we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper who tried to out-lie a liar and lost, a girl who stole an iPod and was immediately hit by karma, and a camper who got into one messy car and entered a full-day horror movie.
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Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
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BIG NEWS! Zachariah was cast in Keke Palmer's new Audible original series and he is breaking it all down! The British accent he had 10 minutes to figure out, recording in the LA studio, and getting to film WITH Keke Palmer for the micro drama THE DAY AFTER getting engaged. We also get into a Florida restaurant that accepts live pythons as payment for pizza, the eBay cyberstalking case that just settled for $56 million, binge-watchi...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who thought she was going to Texas Roadhouse and accidentally joined a crime caravan, a camper who fumbled the FIFA bag for a loser ex, and the tale of one camper who bought garden decor and accidentally sent her husband to the emergency room.
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Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confession...
Summer is almost over! In this episode we're covering our end-of-summer bucket lists, duh. Then we cover Goldie the lil firefighting goat, Jonathan caught strays in the Lowe's parking lot, and so much more. This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!
Sponsors:
➜ Go to zbiotics.com/CAMP15 and use CAMP15 at checkout...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who thought she was going to Texas Roadhouse and accidentally joined a crime caravan, a camper who fumbled the FIFA bag for a loser ex, and the tale of one camper who bought garden decor and accidentally sent her husband to the emergency room.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confession...
This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!
Sponsors:
➜ Go to BollAndBranch.com/camp (and use code: camp) to get up to 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set of sheets. Exclusions apply. See site for details.
Works Cited:
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Camp Songs:
Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape
Soci...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who stole a birthday sash and got cursed by a boho fairy, a camper trapped in her boyfriend’s house, and the tale of one camper who became the lead character in a Myspace urban legend.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Sponsors:
We’re talking Shark Week, Jaws, cushioned toilet seats, and Jonathan's SHOCKING discovery hidden inside a bowl of garlic butter mussels. We also get into Dolly Parton’s new Broadway musical, the Dolly-to-Buffy the Vampire Slayer pipeline (obvi), California returning Blues Beach to Indigenous tribes, overheated iPhones AND SO MUCH MORE!
This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a Jahova’s Witness caught with sticky contraband, an uninvited carpool passenger on the way to work, and the tale of a camper who survived leg day, but lost it all to Jersey Mike’s.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Sponsors:
What does a heat rash, a speeding ticket, and a banana shaped car all have in common? They are all in this episode, duh! We're also unpacking a teen Elvis tribute competition, Connecticut’s identity crisis, TikTok pearl parties (allegedly) scamming people, the Wheel of Fortune's shady social media manager, and so much more!
This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everythin...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper in need of advice for her fiance with a bathroom-related tic in very public settings, a camper who just wanted to visit a coworker in the hospital and instead walked into a plot twist nobody at the office saw coming, and the tale of an AXE slinging devil at church camp.
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Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advic...
In the episode we’re talking about the “Have a Gay Summer” drama at Dartmouth High School and why one little Pride bulletin board had terrible ugly adults acting like literal idiodic children. We also get into two former nuns finding love, a robot cop that is terrible at their job, anoying little chipmunks taking over our bird feeder, Disney cruise family trauma... but dont worry bc Zach will close us out with the...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who was forced to take her self-care routine to the streets, one camper who tea bagged too close to the sun and suffered the consequences, and a camper who went to Hooters for wings and left with structural damage on the bill.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror sto...
This week at Camp Shady Birch, Counselor Zachariah was almost cast on The Real Housewives, and then his reality TV career was revoked before it even had time to find a cute outfit. CRIMINAL!! We also talk about Kiki the sheep learning to drive, a $700k gold scam that ended in chocolate coins, milk frother slander, wig shopping, and so much more!!
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer ...
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who helped cover her roommate's portion of the rent only to find that she is funding the Rainforest Cafe, a camper whose cute little Irish getaway became a PetCo disaster, and a camper who had a scary run in with an alligator (and it WASN'T Princess Girl).
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Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossi...
(Original broadcast June 5, 2024)
In this episode, The Counselors talk all things Pride Month, drive-in theaters, and argue the existence of dinosaurs!
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(Original broadcast Sep 30, 2024)
In this episode of Trail Mix, the counselors read submitted stories about a camper's date with a major celebrity's son, a videographer at a funeral, and a bounce house story that will have you wanting to bounce off the face of the Earth.
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