You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic Parents

In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, therapist and boundaries coach Torie Wiksell shares the truth about how that same caretaking instinct keeps so many cycle breakers stuck. Torie opens up about her own experience navigating guilt, fear, and the pressure to protect the people in her family who hurt her—especially as she shares her own story publicly.

This conversation explores:

• How caretaking becomes a form of self-abandonm...

This episode explores the direct pipeline from narcissistic parenting to abusive partners. If you’ve ever blamed yourself for how you survived, this one’s for you.

Next steps for your healing (all at confidentboundaries.com):

• Join the Confident Boundaries Membership for coaching, workshops, and community ($23/mo or $230/yr)
• Get the $9 Holiday Guide to navigate toxic family dynamics this season
• Follow me on TikTok and Ins...

In this week’s episode of You’re Not Crazy, therapist and boundaries coach Torie Wiksell unpacks what really happens when cycle breakers suppress anger—and how to begin separating the emotion of anger from the behavior that once made it unsafe. You’ll learn:

• Why your childhood brain linked anger with danger

• How unprocessed frustration builds until you “snap”

• Why shame keeps you stuck in the same emotional cycle

• ...

If you’ve ever felt the mix of dread, guilt, and anxiety that shows up the second someone mentions “family holidays,” this episode will help you slow down, get perspective, and actually prepare—not just survive.

Torie breaks down:

• Why so many adult children of toxic parents procrastinate holiday planning (and how that backfires)

• How to build new holiday traditions that your family can’t ruin

• Why your “holiday pie” n...

Big news: You’re Not Crazy just joined the Bleav Podcast Network! 🎉 That means more growth, more community, and more support for cycle breakers like you. In this episode, Torie shares what this milestone means for the podcast—and then dives into the harmful “bad advice” cycle breakers often hear, like being told there’s only one right way to heal.

*Want personalized support, live holiday workshops, and Torie’s updated Holiday Surv...

In today’s episode, I’m sharing one of the most important mindset shifts for healing from narcissistic parents or emotionally immature parents: stop asking if they’re a “good person” and start focusing on their repeated behaviors.

So many cycle breakers get stuck in the what ifs:

• What if they don’t mean to hurt me?
• What if they’re doing their best?
• What if they had a hard childhood too?

Lately, I’ve caught myself spiraling into self-gaslighting quite a bit—wondering if I’m exaggerating my childhood trauma, if maybe my mom wasn’t really a narcissist, or if I’m just “too sensitive.” If you’ve ever doubted your own reality, you’re definitely not alone.

In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, I share:

• Why self-gaslighting shows up (especially around stressful seasons like the holidays)
• The hidden reasons cycle b...

In this episode, therapist and boundaries coach Torie Wiksell (and fellow cycle breaker) exposes the myth of “no contact as a fad” and validates the years—sometimes decades—of exhausting effort cycle breakers pour into maintaining relationships with narcissistic or emotionally immature parents before making the heartbreaking decision to step back.

We’ll cover:

• Why going no contact with a toxic parent is never taken lightly
...

Can boundaries actually work with a toxic parent? In this week’s episode of You’re Not Crazy, host Torie Wiksell, therapist, boundaries coach, and fellow cycle breaker, unpacks one of the most common (and confusing) questions adult children of narcissistic, borderline, or emotionally immature parents ask: “Is it even possible to set boundaries with them?”

Torie shares:

• Why boundaries aren’t about changing your toxic parent —...

In today’s episode, we’re talking about a powerful and underrated concept that every cycle breaker needs: “for now.” When you're navigating toxic family dynamics, it’s easy to get paralyzed by the pressure to make the “perfect” decision—whether it’s going no contact, setting a new boundary, or reaching out for support. But healing isn’t linear, and you're allowed to change your mind.

Whether you're deep in indecision or just tired ...

In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, boundaries coach and licensed therapist Torie Wiksell unpacks one of the most damaging cycles cycle breakers face: being scapegoated by toxic parents.

Here’s how the pattern works: your boundaries are violated again and again until you finally react—crying, yelling, or shutting down. That’s when your family points at you as “the problem.” This toxic blame-shifting convinces you that your needs a...

Feeling like you’re “not healed enough” from your toxic family patterns? You’re not broken—and you’re not alone. In this powerful episode of You’re Not Crazy, therapist and boundaries coach Torie Wiksell dismantles the harmful myth of perfect healing that keeps so many cycle breakers stuck in shame and self-judgment.

You’ll learn why healing from narcissistic, borderline, or emotionally immature parents is messy, non-linear, and ne...

This week, I’m sharing a personal story I never expected to be telling: what it’s been like to go viral on TikTok as a boundaries coach for adult children of toxic parents. Spoiler alert—if you’ve ever wondered whether your healing work is actually paying off, I promise this episode will help you see your own progress more clearly.

I talk about the hate comments that echoed things my narcissistic mom used to say, the emotional whip...

You’re not stuck because you’re lazy—you’re stuck because you were trained to put everyone else first. In this episode, I walk you through the mental blocks that keep cycle breakers paralyzed—especially the guilt that makes boundary-setting feel impossible.

Plus, I’m sharing a one-time offer to get everything you need to finally break through—inside the Boundaries Bootcamp Bundle. Don’t miss this: it’s available through Tuesday at ...

Do you catch yourself writing paragraph-long texts just to say “no”?

Do you feel the urge to explain every decision, anticipate every reaction, or soften your truth with a long-winded disclaimer?

That’s not overthinking. That’s overexplaining—and it’s a trauma response.

In this episode, we’re talking about the exhausting cycle of overexplaining yourself, especially if you grew up with a narcissistic or otherwise toxic parent. I’ll ...

Is your toxic parent’s “I’m sorry” leaving you more confused than comforted? In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we unpack why apologies from narcissistic or otherwise toxic parents rarely feel like closure—and often reopen old wounds.

You’ll learn:

• The signs of a real apology (and what performative regret looks like)
• How to stop spiraling when they say “sorry” but nothing changes
• A mindset shift that will help you deci...

In this episode, I talk about the complicated grief that surfaces once we begin setting boundaries and creating distance from toxic, narcissistic, or emotionally immature parents.

I share what it looked like in my own life— the emotional toll of being a parentified child, and why our healing journey often involves mourning the milestones we missed while we were just trying to survive.

This conversation is especially for those who f...

Big news! The Confident Boundaries App is officially live—now available for free on iPhone and Android. Inside, you’ll get instant access to a curated starter bundle of some of my favorite episodes and articles to support your healing from family dysfunction.

In today’s episode, we’re digging into a question I hear often from adult children of narcissistic parents or those with unmanaged BPD:
“Why do I keep ending up in toxic relat...

If you’re breaking toxic cycles in a family marked by emotional immaturity, narcissism, or borderline traits, there’s something we don’t talk about enough: the profound loneliness that can come with healing.

You’re not just setting boundaries—you’re stepping out of the role your family expected you to play. Maybe you were the peacekeeper, the fixer, the golden child, or the scapegoat. But once you stop playing by the unspoken rules...