Tales From The Jails

It's the 25th of December, 2016. Imagine waking up on Christmas morning with a person you only met a few months ago, not your partner or soulmate, but your pad mate, in HMP. I'm on top bunk and he's down below, two lives colliding. 

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than mer...

It's the 16th of December, 2016. It's Friday. Today HMP Birmingham has turned into a riot, resulting in a complete meltdown. The official statement as of 5:00 PM is control has been lost. The G4S private prison has between four and 600 prisoners rioting, and the place is on fire. The news is showing meat wagons waiting to ship out prisoners once the officers take back control. Walton is full. In fact, most prisons are ful...

It's official. Toenails has left the building. There was no real camaraderie. Number 1, a fellow Despicable, walked with him to the meat wagon. From the rest of us however, it was more good riddance than au revoir. The place felt instantly brighter the moment the toxic mood hoover left. 

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of m...

Breaking news. It's just been unofficially confirmed. Toenails departs in two days. Cat D. He's hanging on in reception by his grubby fingernails and his days are numbered. And if he's caught doing anything untoward his Cat D is over and he'll be shipped out of here.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life...

I have said many times, nothing and no one is sacred when it comes to Scousers, even more so in prison. Inside HMP, in many ways it is like falling down Lewis Carroll's rabbit hole on acid and coming through the other side only to be in a Stephen King nightmare.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to th...

Scouse Rambo is the first to admit that his drink and drug use is way beyond that of recreational. He tells the lads that he once collapsed in a field at Glastonbury, doesn't remember how he got there but when he came to, security was there and a band of Hare Krishnas. He believed he'd been kidnapped by ISIS  and they were about to behead him. The cocktail of drugs he'd been on had finally taken their toll.

During the...

We're full to capacity in Walton. We never went to work on Saturday because we were full. History in the making, again. The news before we left for work this morning was that a prisoner commits suicide every three days in prison. It was quoted as an epidemic. The prison system blamed it on mental health issues, but it's far murkier than that. Morale is low amongst officers and lads are desperate, and desperate people do d...

The local BBC news is outside the prison, and officers are striking outside. It's chaos beyond the door and we're subjected to Christmas ads playing every 12 minutes on TV, on almost every channel.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

Only 48 hours ago, mobile phone footage was uploaded to the net and social media of 230 inmates in HMP Bedford running riot and out of control. Day by day the broken prison system is making the headlines.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

...

How do you respond or react to someone when they are seemingly happy and you feel lousy? It takes on a whole new meaning in here, manifesting in anger, violence or malicious acts to derail your happiness.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

...

As I settled and focused, there was a young inmate slumped on the floor with a bed sheet noose tied around his neck. He was alive, but he was desperate.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

Most names have been changed. The events have not. <...

By seven o'clock this morning the BBC was reporting a man knifed and dead in Pentonville, two seriously injured and two arrested. By the time I'd put the phone down on T, a guy had been slashed in the showers on the fives. A normal day in HMP. I am so familiar with the mayhem and violence that my biggest concern is being out of coffee.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. ...

The constant level of juvenile behaviour is beyond what you can imagine, but at the same time it has to be taken seriously because of the ever present violent undertones that lurk. You may be surprised to hear that vanity plays a significant role in HMP from personal male grooming to touching another man's muscles, or at least admiring them up close and personal. My funniest moment has to be with Big J, who's been shaving...

Any one of us can be attacked or caught up in a violent episode, and potentially or probably be knifed, slashed, coshed, swilled, strangled or battered brutally and viciously. Who do you become as a result of any of this, when on the receiving end and scarred for life?

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to ...

Self-harming is as common as the cockroaches that appear each evening. The place is infested with self-harming severe mental health issues and men attempting suicide daily, to the entertainment of far too many lads on the wing.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst ...

Four lads went in on another inmate. Brutal attack apparently. They tried to cut his ears off because he's supposedly a nonce, aka a paedophile. Worse than the attack itself was the screaming from the lad.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

Crime is bigger than both the Beatles and Liverpool Football Club in this city, and I am nestled in the epicentre of one of the most criminally minded group of men in Europe, and it's chaos of a different kind.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated...

What was it like being GW? It was all crazy as fuck. I used to drink a lot, champagne back in those days. Vodka too...

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

Most names have been changed. The events have not.

This is a Jekyll & Pr...

Can you imagine being cooped up in a prison cell without any power? No lights, no TV, no hot water and no radio.

During the three and a half years I was in prison I wrote over a million words by hand. Tales From The Jails is a contemporaneous account of my life, and attempts to thrive rather than merely survive, whilst incarcerated.

Most names have been changed. The events have not.

This is a Jekyll & Pride pr...