You've Got to Be Critting Me

In the very first episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, our newly-formed adventuring party arrives in the quiet port town of Sestone, only to be thrust into chaos when a young man named Harold stumbles into town, horribly mutated with squid-like features. As the group scrambles to help him, they begin unraveling a mystery involving strange disappearances, dark magic, and eerie transformations. With the help of locals, including ...

In this episode, our adventurers find themselves in a local tavern, where the drinks are strong, and the rumors are stronger. As they send off Erin and prepare for their next steps, they dig into the mysteries surrounding the missing fishermen at the docks. With a potential lead on Almore Island, the party debates whether to question the families of the lost or head straight into the unknown. Tensions rise, drinks are downed, and a...

The party dives deeper into Sestone’s mysteries, meeting a dockworker who shares unsettling rumors of missing townsfolk and ghostly sightings. But their night takes a dark turn back at the tavern when two monstrous, tentacled creatures crash into the kitchen. Forced into a fierce battle, the adventurers realize the dangers are far greater than they imagined and prepare for their next step: heading to the ominous island.

DM...

In this episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, strange dreams and lingering dangers haunt our adventurers. After a night of unsettling, vivid nightmares, the party awakens with a sense that something sinister is afoot. As they shake off the disturbing visions, they head to Almore island in search of the missing goods. As they approach the shoreline tensions rise as they encounter a suspicious figure. The group has to decide wheth...

In this episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, our adventurers find themselves navigating a smoke-filled cove as they plan a daring ambush on a gnoll crew. Tensions run high as the team attempts to balance stealth and strategy, only for chaos to erupt when battle breaks out. From critical hits to creative tactics, the party faces off against relentless foes in a fight that pushes their skills, and their luck, to the limit.

Wi...

The party sails back to Sestone with Gregor’s reclaimed goods in tow, ready to fulfill their deal. As they reflect on their recent adventures, discussions of strange dreams and lingering mysteries hint at unsettling connections. With new information and an ominous urgency, the party begins preparing for their next journey back to the island to uncover what lies ahead.

Tune in for an episode of reflection, growing intrigue,...

As the party ventures further into the ominous monastery, they encounter unsettling horrors. A half-mutated man, a graveyard of rising skeletons, and the ever-looming threat of discovery. Tensions escalate when a thunderous spell reverberates through the island, culminating in the ominous tolling of a bell that signals danger on all sides. With every step, the adventurers uncover more about the island’s dark mysteries while b...

The party continues their journey through the eerie monastery, encountering unsettling visions and uncovering remnants of the past. From a tense standoff with giant rats to mysterious voices and the discovery of cryptic artifacts, their exploration takes a darker turn. With every step deeper into the monastery, the adventurers piece together more of the island’s secrets while facing the growing dangers lurking in the shadows.

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In this episode, the party delves deeper into the eerie ruins of Almore Island, uncovering unsettling mysteries and facing dangerous foes. With traps, moldy corpses, and a sinister discovery waiting around every corner, they’ll need to rely on wit, magic, and a bit of luck to survive. Will they find the missing villagers in time, or will the island's secrets prove too much to handle? Tune in for thrilling encounters, unexpect...

A simple exploration turns into a haunting encounter as the party delves deeper into the monastery ruins. Between eerie whispers, floating bones, and a cryptic stone door, tensions rise as they uncover a long-forgotten tomb. But when curiosity gets the best of them, they quickly learn that some doors are better left closed... and some spirits aren’t ready to rest. With skeleton battles, risky puzzles, and an unfortunate posse...

Trapped in the depths of the monastery’s ruins, our adventurers face their greatest enemy yet: puzzles. With spectral hauntings behind them and eerie statues ahead, Malcius, Sefi, Thormir, and Todd must unravel the mystery of a cryptic inscription, a locked lantern, and a glowing orb that definitely doesn’t want to be touched (looking at you, Todd). As frustration mounts and lightning damage stacks, will they crack the ...

In this thrilling episode of You've Got to Be Critting Me, the party ventures deeper into the treacherous ruins of the monastery. When a mysterious druid, Zaharel, emerges from the shadows, alliances are questioned, and Malcius’s charm magic is put to the ultimate test.

With each step, the heroes uncover darker secrets, from the enigmatic rift below to the looming threat of Guthber's sinister plans. As tensions rise and th...

Deep beneath the ruined monastery, the party’s plan teeters on the edge of discovery.

With Zaharel still under Malcius’s charm, the adventurers navigate treacherous tunnels, deceiving monstrous enforcers and dodging ancient threats in the shadows. But time is running out, and the rift waits.

As Todd’s rat companion grows more restless, drawn to an unknown power pulsing just beyond reach, secrets begin to surface. Wh...

Episode 14: The Weight of a Name

The battle may be over, but the aftermath is just beginning. In the shadow of the rift, our heroes come face to face with their newfound powers-and the haunting whispers that accompany them. Malcius wrestles with imposter syndrome, Todd forms a strange new pact (and gains an imp with attitude), and the party is left wondering: are they truly the legendary "Unfated Ones" foretold in prophecy?

As th...

New to You’ve Got to Be Critting Me and want to catch up fast?

This special recap episode covers the story so far - from our party’s arrival in Setstone, to the horrors of Almore Island, to the whispers of the Far Realm itself.

Meet our heroes:

• Malcius Sorrow - tiefling bard with flair (and questionable use of Thunderwave).
• Sefi - a towering goliath fighter who doesn’t hesitate to act.
• Thormir Moonsight - a dwarven...

Episode 15: No One Left Behind

Cornered in the dark tunnels beneath the monastery, the party faces their deadliest challenge yet - a monstrous carrion crawler lurking in the shadows. With magic and steel, they rally together, fighting not only for their own lives but for the freedom of every prisoner left on the island. As the sea roars against the cliffs and the last escape routes narrow, desperate choices must be made. ...

Episode 16 – “The Idiots and Their Beans”

Back in Sestone, the party takes a moment to rest, reconnect, and reflect, but peace is a fragile thing. As strange gifts are unwrapped and unsettling questions arise, even the comfort of home can't keep the nightmares away. A bizarre magical discovery threatens to unravel everyone's patience… and possibly their sanity.

DM: Jeffery Jordan

Malcius: Travis Stewart

Sef...

The party tries to enjoy a peaceful morning in town... until Malcius drops a bombshell over breakfast: a cursed statue version of himself, born from a magic bean, wants him dead. As they debate whether to smash it, sell it, or study it, tensions rise and secrets surface. With old ghosts stirred and new plans brewing, the group returns to the island and prepares to face the monster they once left behind.

Magic, missteps, and miniatur...

The party returns to the well beneath Almore Island, determined to finish what they started. With rope in hand and tension high, they make the dangerous descent into the darkness once more.

Navigating the familiar stone corridors, they prepare themselves for a confrontation with the creature they narrowly escaped before. But as they press deeper, they discover the island's dangers haven't diminished, and the stakes are higher than e...