Savage Lovecast
Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex and relationship questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, record your question and send it to Q@Savage.Love, or call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.
Episodes
July 15, 2025 • 51 mins
The woman in a married couple that does not want children accidentally got pregnant. This happened once before, and she learned that her husband is against abortion on religious grounds. Should she tell him she will end this pregnancy, or keep it secret from him?
Do accidents happen in BDSM? They sure do! Hear the harrowing tale of one man's consequential mistake. Dan brings on Australian kink educator "The Funny Dom" to talk thi...
Mark as Played
July 8, 2025 • 51 mins
A queer woman has a non-binary, AFAB spouse. Her partner can mime the action of cunnilingus with their tongue, flicking and teasing across the dinner table, like a horny lizard. The caller wishes she could do the same, but her tongue just doesn't work that way. She also gets low marks on her oral technique, and couldn't play the clarinet very well in school. Does she just have a bad tongue? Are there exercises she could do?
A 5...
Mark as Played
July 1, 2025 • 55 mins
A woman in her late 40s is struggling to process a relationship she had when she was in college. She slept with a former professor of hers but then got rejected by him. After she moved away, she arranged a visit with him, and got rejected again. Now, over 20 years later, she's wondering if his actions were unethical or inappropriate.
We've gotten some tricky parenting questions in the past, but this one is extra-special. The call...
Mark as Played
June 24, 2025 • 55 mins
Her boyfriend of one year is perfect in every way! Except...he is stoned literally all the time. But he's a great lover, communicates well, and truly loves the caller. So is this really a problem? Will it be eventually?
A gay man was raised Mormon, and got the hell out. Now he's living his best gay life, with a boyfriend he loves. But he never had a slutty phase, and worries that the only way to truly exorcise the Mormon mentalit...
Mark as Played
June 17, 2025 • 50 mins
We start the show with two calls concerning the "post nut" state of mind. One man hates that he becomes selfish and unresponsive so much that he chooses not to come at all. Another wonders if we should start calling it "post-nut confusion."
Just in time for Pride, it's a new After-Action Report! Hear the tale of Ian- a straight man who gave a man head for the first time. What were the circumstances of this premier dick-sucking? W...
Mark as Played
June 10, 2025 • 57 mins
When she was in high school, she surprised herself and delighted her boyfriend by squirting all over his face. But the incident alarmed her enough to set off a neurotic need to pee before every sexual encounter. How can she get out of her head about it, and allow for spontaneity in her current, awesome sex life?
A woman is in an in a polyamorous, fantastic, committed relationship full of compersion. Sounds great right? The prob...
Mark as Played
June 3, 2025 • 55 mins
A married woman in a poly relationship is planning to visit a boyfriend who lives in a different city for a month. But since they made these plans, she started seeing yet another man. Should she tell the guy she plans to visit about the new guy? Should she do it before the trip so he can pull the rip cord if he needs to?
Can you peg your dom? She is a switch, so she knows both sides of the dom/sub dynamic. Her dom wants her to ...
Mark as Played
May 27, 2025 • 45 mins
A man in Nashville keeps having great dates, but then they reject him afterwards. Is it because he's a liberal Jew?
A woman is in a new, fun, casual relationship, just like she wanted. But he will be moving away in a few months, so there's a clear end date. How can they enjoy themselves knowing the end is nigh?
On the Magnum, put on your pink glasses...it's Randy Rainbow! Rainbow's political, musical theater-based parodies are w...
Mark as Played
May 20, 2025 • 53 mins
A man in a queer group chat saw that folks were talking about going to a bathhouse in their city for the first time. The caller explained what goes on there, how consent can be slushy, and trans men might not feel welcome. This shut down the conversation. Was he wrong to tell it like it is?
A divorced woman with a 4 year old daughter is friendly with her ex-husband but not close. Her daughter is asking why mommy and daddy are not ...
Mark as Played
May 13, 2025 • 54 mins
HA man briefly dated a guy who only bottoms, and collects a variety of giant dildos. The caller worries that his natural size would never satisfy a man like this, and wonders if this is just the standard psychology of power bottoms.
A straight woman tends to be attracted to gay and bisexual men, though she's never dated one. She would be interested in dating a bi man, but she requires monogamy, and worries that precious few bi ...
Mark as Played
May 6, 2025 • 55 mins
Oh boy! A threesome might be brewing! A woman just connected with a hot guy through an app. He has another woman he sees, and the three of them plan to get together. But the caller is convinced that the other two are way more attractive than she is, and she worries she'll feel insecure and inadequate. How can she get over this stinkin' thinkin'?
A woman has been in a casual friends-with-benefits relationship. The sex is fantasti...
Mark as Played
April 29, 2025 • 47 mins
Ooh la la! A young Canadian woman has been living in a European city, making friends and... having group sex. She doesn't speak their language- her friends are usually accommodating and speak English around her. But sometimes when the gang is banging, they revert to their native tongue and she feels left out. Should she let it slide, or let her lovers know she needs dirty talk translation?
A woman with high libido has always been ...
Mark as Played
April 22, 2025 • 53 mins
My what a busy friend! While a woman and her boyfriend were going through a painful, temporary separation, she confided in and was consoled by a male, bi friend of hers. He helped her through the difficult time. But he was also propositioning her ex-boyfriend at the same, damn time! Now that she is back together with her boyfriend, can she trust this friend again?
A woman gives a compelling defense of faking orgasms. Will Dan Sav...
Mark as Played
April 15, 2025 • 51 mins
A chill married lesbian is a little annoyed to hear that her consistently straight friend, engaged to a man, has announced that she is pan. She is pan, but she plans to remain monogamous with her husband. What's more, she is throwing herself a coming-out-as-pan party. When the caller came out as lesbian, she got kicked out of the house. Is she an asshole to feel less than exhilarated by her friend's new sexual identity?
Yikes! He...
Mark as Played
April 8, 2025 • 54 mins
A gay man and his boyfriend are in an open relationship. His boyfriend forbids the caller from messing around with anyone in their friend group. But this friend group is super-kinky and super-horny, regularly propositioning the caller for naughty fun. It's getting hard to say no...
A trans guy still has "female" on his birth certificate. He wonders if it's too dangerous to try to get it changed at this perilous moment, and also if...
Mark as Played
April 1, 2025 • 45 mins
A woman has made a new exciting friend! But this friend ditches her other friends and treats them as disposable. Is the caller next?
Here's the kind of pragmatic question and answer you've come to expect from the Savage Lovecast: Is it safe to douche with non-potable water?
On the Magnum, folks have been asking for a menopause expert for a while now, and we've got her. Dr. Stacy De-Lin has been a proud member of the Planned Pare...
Mark as Played
March 25, 2025 • 55 mins
A man chanced upon his wife's journals when he was cleaning the closets. He simply couldn't help himself. He read some of them, and learned about her erotic desires in a way he hadn't known before. It made him fall in love with her all over again. But now what? Should he tell her what he did?
Blindfold magic! A woman had a transcendent experience when her boyfriend blindfolded her and then...removed the blindfold. There he was! A...
Mark as Played
March 18, 2025 • 53 mins
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Feeld
This episode is ...
Mark as Played
March 11, 2025 • 45 mins
A woman is seeing a guy who only grudgingly goes down south. Sex for them always begins with her giving him a BJ, but because they have a Dom/sub dynamic, he feels he doesn't owe her anything. Here's a fun word scramble game that astute Savage Lovecast listeners can play! Unscramble these letters to form the acronym that will give the caller clear direction on what to do: TMAFD
A man is curious, confused, and bewildered about what ...
Mark as Played
March 4, 2025 • 56 mins
Age gap relationships! Sometimes they are a-ok. Sometimes they are not. A woman is having an argument with her boyfriend about whether his previous relationship was dicey because of the 9-year age difference. She dated a younger person too, but the circumstances were different. Dan Savage (who knows from age gap relationships) weighs in.
A man in a throuple with two ladies can't sleep because their bed gets too toasty at night. Som...
Mark as Played
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