SubwayTakes with Kareem Rahma
SubwayTakes but longer. Also, it's podcasts. A co-creation of Kareem Rahma and Andrew Kuo. In partnership with Talkhouse Network.
Episodes
July 15, 2025 • 15 mins
Stand-up comedian, writer, actor, and director Bill Burr (Paper Tiger, F Is for Family, Glengarry Glen Ross) hits the subway for an unfiltered conversation about everything from Bloomberg ruining New York to billionaires blaming immigrants for low wages. He explains why he’ll never move to Brooklyn, why cable news is tearing people apart, and why America feels more divided than ever.From parenting advice to politics, Bill has thoug...
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July 3, 2025 • 61 mins
Kareem is joined by deep-cut friend of the pod, Blake Bensman, to discuss his SubwayTake that men should pee sitting down, including its health benefits, Kareem’s curation of a museum of mayonnaise (July 9th 6-8 pm 155 Suffolk Street NYC), more urination strategies, the handwashing gossip of a major network news anchor, additional approaches to personal hygiene, the “Long Island Compromise,” the stinky situation of corporate life, ...
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July 1, 2025 • 49 mins
Kareem and Andrew inaugurate the new video version of the podcast by meeting in person at SubwayTakes HQ in Manhattan. Kareem, with a somewhat hoarse voice, recaps the crazy energy of the Zohran Mamdani election victory party, the allegations surfaced as a result, the continued rise of Islamophobia, what’s for lunch today, young Ramy's romantic entanglements in his acting class, the ongoing saga of New York City’s most dangerous as...
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June 26, 2025 • 58 mins
Kareem is joined by Annie Hamilton, to reconsider her original take, the absolute avalanche of DMs she’s received since, the reveal of the controversial censored joke she told on the show, how she landed a book deal because of her appearance on the show, if it accomplished the goal of all goals (getting laid), whether or not Annie and Kareem have “the thing,” the ruination of Annie’s life/art, Kareem’s life plans and terms of addre...
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June 19, 2025 • 72 mins
Kareem, from his office in Manhattan, with filmmaker and SubwayTakes “Head of Politics” Anthony Di Mieri, from his place in Bushwick, discuss decluttering, Anthony healing his chronic tardiness, his life plans and location history, his role in Zohran Mamdani’s campaign, the state of Italian-American affairs (including the emerging Little Italy in Williamsburg), the currency of brain rot and mainstream news, an update on Dimes Squar...
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June 12, 2025 • 83 mins
Kareem, from his office in Manhattan, and Andrew (SubwayTakes co-creator and producer) from his home in the Hudson Valley, analyze Mike Birbiglia’s illustrious aura, recap Kareem’s wild weekend of schmoozing and commerce, his warning to Andrew Cuomo, an honorific to the recently departed Billy Jones, an update on Annie Hamilton’s take (she can no longer take the subway), and we take some calls from the SubwayTakes hotline. Then, Ka...
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June 5, 2025 • 70 mins
Kareem, from his office in Manhattan, and Andrew (SubwayTakes Co-creator and producer), from his home in the Hudson Valley, recount Kareem’s Denver bachelor party weekend, how and where to get gonorrhea (aka the saga of Bathhouse), Kareem suffering from success, how many ways there are to die in New York City (specifically the peril of most window air conditioning units), the crooks behind the scaffolding industry, Kareem’s possibl...
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May 29, 2025 • 61 mins
Kareem, from his office in Manhattan, and Andrew (SubwayTakes Co-creator and producer), from his home in the Hudson Valley, talk over Andrew’s recent nuptials, his Vows feature in The New York Times, the liberal use of the word “creative,” making your own trophies, Kareem’s feud with the paper of record, an update on Andrew’s foray into social media, walking through Kareem setting up a Google Voice number (347-746-5518) where liste...
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May 22, 2025 • 86 mins
From their studio and basement, respectively, Kareem and Ian rehash his original take, why Ian’s display name on the podcast app is Shrimp King, how the ‘90s were the pinnacle of…everything, the taxonomy of gremlins versus goblins, body dysmorphia in men, the etiquette of riding the subway as a public persona, the phenomenon of Ye’s latest track, moving to Thailand to sell carpet or wood paneling, everyone smashing their phones, li...
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May 15, 2025 • 88 mins
From their offices, Kareem and Willa rehash Willa’s original take, how dating apps are like buying a used car, why SubwayTakes is a dating app, reminiscing on apps like Yik Yak, Grouper, and LiveJournal, Willa being mistaken for Cazzie David, Willa’s experience so far as the youngest-ever Editor-In-Chief of Cosmopolitan and Seventeen, the etiquette of declining a marriage proposal, how therapists are easily manipulated, the “waste ...
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May 14, 2025 • 34 mins
"People are real down on the subway lately but I still like taking it!!" Kareem and Michael continue on the train and talk about Michael's directorial debut, Eric Larue, directing as a way of developing every character in a movie, Kareem and Michael's future buddy comedy where they open an indie Target (and also their buddy drama where they're roommates), male best friend breakup stories as a new genre, Michael's love of R.E.M., do...
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May 8, 2025 • 63 mins
From their homes, Kareem and Rachel get down to brass tacks on vanish mode, signing documents, executive dysfunction, living alone, boarding schools, Rachel’s Carrie Bradshaw era, the West Village Girl phenomenon, Kareem’s old website, “real jobs,” the dynamics of the group chat and its accompanying drama, friendship fallout, national security issues, the amazing Zach Schiffman, the names of group chats, purpose-based group chats, ...
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May 1, 2025 • 71 mins
From their home studios, Kareem and Jay revisit banana hammocks, saying “congratulations” for birthdays, what Jay calls “summertime penis,” the politics of a Speedo, the dongs of various Greek gods, Lenny Kravitz’s ever-present bulge (and infamous dick slip), the demographics of what we’re calling “the hat draft,” funky ass white boys, the great new band The Paradox, aging into our true selves, the merits of customer loyalty, mushr...
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April 24, 2025 • 78 mins
From their home studios, Kareem and Paul re-litigate how Heinz is the best ketchup of all time and why fries must be included with the price of a burger. They also dig into bald-guy and gap-tooth representation (does David Letterman have a gap?), fashion tips for aging cool guys, wasting time in the gym, what are Miracle Whip, Clamato, and club soda exactly, the Italian race debate, Paul’s ties to the mafia, the importance of a but...
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April 22, 2025 • 36 mins
"Fundamentally, everyone is a good person!" Kareem and Ramy continue on the train, grab a meal at IBN Hamido in Astoria, Queens and and talk about finally peeing after you've been holding it for too long, probiotic yogurt causing sharts, Ramy's new animated show #1 Happy Family USA on Prime Video, turning into a dad with manic energy, babies eating sea bass and wagyu, maximizing the Chinese buffet, getting your beans confiscated at...
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April 17, 2025 • 74 mins
From their homes, Kareem and Abdullah also discuss NYC smelling like worms, slugs are unhoused snails, Abdullah's alt take that was "we should make farting socially acceptable" but it had already done, two cat households, Kareem needing a bodyguard, brown guys at Vice, what it felt like when Abdullah got the phone call greenlighting his show Deli Boys, eating shit sandwiches in Hollywood, deciding to being the mysterious strong sil...
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April 10, 2025 • 65 mins
From their homes, Kareem and Joyelle also discuss White spicy, Black Las Vegas, Kareem v. Karim v. Krem, Oprah v. Orpah, being North African American, Italians are white, everyone should be forced to work as a server for a while, omakase, eating everything with chopsticks, all men wishing they were standup comedians, rawdogging life with no therapy, being head of social media for the Army, monoculture, how most coffee shops are bad...
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April 3, 2025 • 67 mins
From their homes, Kareem and Hari also discuss how Florida is America's dick, Trump-style takes, the Dakotas don't have enough people, odd numbers, Kareem doesn't know state capitals, land acknowledgements, square shaped states, states that are mid, people wearing shoes inside is a colonial mindset, it's never too late for butt stuff, Al Cowlings, nondiscriminatory racists, Kareem going to tanning salons and other stuff.
Host: Kare...
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March 27, 2025 • 33 mins
"Queens is the KING of all Boroughs!" Kareem and Nigel continue on the train and talk about drifting his bike at 4yrs old in his grandmother's driveway, signing with the legend Dave Mirra, going viral on YouTube, how "selling out" isn't a thing, the Brooklyn Banks, riding his bike 40hrs a week, sending emails and doing zooms, Nigel's iconic subway platform jump photo, time lengths on therapy, Paris, his new Air Jordan collab, custo...
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March 20, 2025 • 28 mins
"Leaf blowers need to be eradicated from the face of the earth!!" Kareem and Cate continue on the train and talk about blowing v. sucking, Kareem's sunglasses as camouflage, Cate wearing white sneakers but still being a real fornicator, Feluccas, her new movie Black Bag, Kareem being the most famous mole man in NYC, Cate disliking dirty glasses, the Australian epidemic in NYC and other stuff.
Host: Kareem Rahma
Creators: Kareem R...
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