How Do I Rob This?
Two gentleman thieves planning the perfect heist.
Episodes
February 10, 2022 • 60 mins
Our two non-fungible gentleman thieves are back, less fungible than ever, more non-fungible, and tokens of virtue, honesty, and petty theft. In this special episode, we yet again attempt to wrap our heads around NFTs, try to figure out what fungible even means, and discuss the linguistics of – to funge – . In the […]
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November 27, 2021 • 54 mins
Harry Macklowe, real estate lover and fine art hater, has painted a Cy Twombly style target on his head – selling a collection of fine art curated by his ex-wife and himself, posting his wedding pics 42ft wide all over New York City, and taking on loans worth a few billion. So, whatever the divorce […]
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October 4, 2021 • 55 mins
Our gentleman thieves are back, baby! For season two! And we’re balls deep inside the latest digital scheme to relieve numbnuts of their hard earned moneys: NFTs. What is an NFT? How do they work? Why would anyone buy them? And, most importantly, which companies profit off of them and have bounty ripe for the […]
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July 10, 2021 • 20 mins
Just so this is clear! This isn’t the show now! We’re not busting scams, other people are far more competent at that. All we are is two friendly gentlemen thieves planning the perfect heist and occasionally helping out people in need of not being scammed. HerTeamOfficial (now Official Femfire) and ThtSoundsGay are two more scams […]
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June 7, 2021 • 30 mins
Oskar has fled to international waters while Sebastian remains behind – but nothing can or will stop our two gentleman thieves who are now reduced to one gentleman thief. This month you’ll receive more fun shenanigans from harassing instagram scams as well as an update on SmoothMyBalls and what are arch rivals from going bald […]
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May 7, 2021 • 75 mins
Did SmoothMyBalls with their smooth bot network get in touch with you as well? Well, they did with us… and boy, we dedicated an entire episode to the “brand”, the affiliate scheme, and the products behind it. Hey there! I work for the “How Do I Rob This?” podcast and I’m a great fan of […]
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April 9, 2021 • 61 mins
Germany is world renowned for its efficiency – but the vaccine rollout demonstrates that more bureaucracy isn’t always better. With jabs not being shoved into peoples arms, the two gentleman thieves take it upon themselves to vaccinate the willing, the deserving, and themselves. Involving elaborate costumes that would fool Sherlock Holmes himself, a layout of […]
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February 12, 2021 • 56 mins
Oo-De-Lally, motherinvestors! Your favourite theoretical heist podcast is back! Recently Robin Hood – the app not the legend – made hedge funds lose billions and Vlad the Impaler (CEO of Robin Hood – again, the app) quickly struck back and banned everyone from making hedge funds lose money by stocking shorts or shorting stocks. Meanwhile […]
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December 7, 2020 • 66 mins
A day may come when the courage of podcasting men fails, when the hour of the wolf draws nigh and we leave all market shares to far more popular podcasts, but it is not this day! This day, we record remotely! In this brand new episode, our two gentleman of Numenor thieves return to their […]
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November 7, 2020 • 48 mins
Our two gentleman thieves are split up yet again. While Oskar Brown is oa secret mission retrieving a vaccine microchip from Bill Gates, Sebastian Weissbach distracts you with some ASMR. This solo episode is as sensual as it is nonsensical and brings you some much needed relaxation and deep ear attention, if that’s what you’re […]
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October 13, 2020 • 69 mins
Influencers are the bane of modern society. They are everywhere, on the streets, in your house, even in your phones! The worst of the worst live in something called Honey House, which is like Hype House for adults. Quote unquote adults. These twentysomethings and their made up careers are no match for two gentleman thieves […]
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September 7, 2020 • 60 mins
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it two gentleman thieves glued together in an overly expensive suit on a mission to steal Nic Cage’s Superman outfit? Yup. It’s just that. In this episode we time travel to the magical year of 1997, when Nicolas Cage could’ve been Tim Burton’s Superman, fought off […]
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August 16, 2020 • 57 mins
In this episode our two gentleman thieves prove that this is a comedy, not a science podcast. How heavy is one kilogram? Well, it’s a kilogram, that seems to be the obvious answer, but there is a better answer hidden deep underneath the Pavillon de Breteuil. At least an answer that’s more fun to steal: […]
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July 9, 2020 • 62 mins
What would you do, if you had all the money, fame, and power in the world? Well, if you are world (now in-)famous author Just Kidding Rowling (or maybe it’s pronounced Rowling?) the answer is simple: Use your platform to be a transphobic TERF. Our two gentlemen thieves of course can’t and won’t let that […]
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June 10, 2020 • 58 mins
Lockdown can’t hold our two gentleman thieves down as they dive deep into the US’s colonial history and take care of one illustrious John Smith. Not the agent from the “Matrix”, the one from Disney’s “Pocahontas”. Except in real life. Turns out, 17th century British captain and Virginia’s governour John Smith was a dick. Who […]
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May 7, 2020 • 61 mins
Our two gentleman thieves are still in lockdown, but somehow both managed to obtain microphones for this month’s episode. So fret not, audio quality is much better than last time, content quality as well. Did you know that COVID-19 is a fake and also a government conspiracy to mind control non lizard people and distract […]
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April 9, 2020 • 83 mins
Prison can’t keep two gentleman thieves back, lockdown can’t keep two gentleman thieves back, and neither can varying audio quality. Corona rules apply, so social distancing, no fancy suits, no first class flights. Join us for episode 20 of our podcast as Oskar and Sebastian steal from the richest prick on Earth Jeffaniel Jeffrey Bezos […]
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March 7, 2020 • 64 mins
No commander in chief is complete without two of them! That’s testicles and Air Force One and Air Force One II – Electric Boogaloo. Just in time for the upcoming US election pitting one old white man against another, our gentleman thief Sebastian (not that old, white, man) and vixen of crime Judith will steal […]
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February 7, 2020 • 60 mins
A diamond might be forever, but it can still change hands. On November 7th 2000 seven criminals attempted to steal the Millennium Star diamond with brute force and a speed boat and were caught before they could get a hand on the loot. On February 7th 2020 Judith and Sebastian will succeed where they failed. […]
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January 7, 2020 • 76 mins
Nothing is quite as fashionable as crime… perhaps the world’s most famous Birman cat Choupette. Now that her previous owner Karl Lagerfeld designs black suits in – optimistically – Limbo, she is left to her own devices and Lagerfeld’s millions. Together with special guest Erman Jones our two gentleman thieves plan for a speedy getaway […]
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