The Boundaries.me Podcast

The Boundaries.me Podcast

Dr. Henry Cloud's Boundaries.me podcast features inspiring stories about the benefits to your relationships, mental health, productivity and wellbeing that come when you implement healthy boundaries.

Episodes

May 20, 2025 46 mins

Dr. Cloud explores emotional regulation and the skill of "right-sizing" your responses to life events - learning when you're overreacting to minor problems or minimizing serious issues. He answers a written question about dealing with a narcissistic sister who escalates and spreads lies when ignored, then takes calls from a single father rebuilding after leaving ministry and facing unemployment, and a woman questioning whether to m...

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Dr. Henry Cloud explores the critical role of attention in achieving life goals. He breaks down how executive functions of the brain—including attending to what's relevant, inhibiting distractions, and maintaining working memory—affect our ability to accomplish tasks ranging from daily errands to relationship repair. Dr. Cloud discusses how modern technology constantly competes for our limited attention and offers practical strateg...

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In this episode of the show, Dr. Henry Cloud discusses the importance of developing a curious mindset rather than a critical one. He explains how snap judgments and rigid thinking limit our options and relationships, while seeking to understand others creates better connections. The episode includes a write-in question about anxiety that arises when experiencing happiness, with Dr. Cloud explaining how past experiences can create v...

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In this episode, Dr. Henry Cloud presents a systematic approach to identifying anxiety sources through targeted self-reflection questions originally developed for a CEO client. Dr. Cloud's detailed framework of questions is designed to help listeners pinpoint specific triggers of anxiety, including external stressors, relationship dynamics, internal pressures, and unresolved trauma. Dr. Cloud also addresses a write-in question abou...

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In this episode, Dr. Henry Cloud explores the concept of balance in life, focusing on the relationship between our relational and performance sides. He explains how integrity means being whole and integrated in both areas, using the metaphor of a boat's wake to help listeners evaluate their life patterns. Throughout the episode, Dr. Cloud provides practical ways to assess life balance, shares strategies for identifying...

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In this episode of the Dr. Cloud Show, Dr. Henry Cloud examines harmful parenting language patterns that may go unnoticed. He explains why phrases like "you need to" undermine children's autonomy and offers practical alternatives that help children develop their own sense of responsibility. Dr. Cloud also discusses the concept of "chunking" as a time management strategy - combining multiple activities to maximize effic...

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In a deeply personal episode, Dr. Henry Cloud reads a letter he wrote to his daughter when she turned twelve, revealing key markers of growing maturity that apply to adults of all ages. Through his letter, Dr. Cloud explores how becoming an adult involves learning to be your own source, guardian, and manager—vital skills many still struggle with decades later. Later, listeners call in with questions about overcoming fear of judgmen...

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In this episode Dr. Henry Cloud explores the mindset shift needed to navigate life's inevitable challenges. Beginning with the biblical principle that "in this world you have tribulation," Dr. Cloud examines how accepting reality—rather than fighting against it—makes us more resilient when facing difficulties.

The show also includes conversations with callers facing significant life transitions. Vanessa grapples with leaving a teac...

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In this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show, Dr. Henry Cloud explores the powerful impact of negative thought patterns and how they affect our mental health. Drawing from clinical experience, he addresses how automatic negative thoughts can function like "someone walking behind you banging you on the head with a stick" - a metaphor that captures how self-criticism operates in our minds. This episode features practical techni...

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Dr. Henry Cloud examines how social media platforms and advertisers deliberately target the brain's reward system. The episode explores how these entities track preferences and serve content designed to trigger dopamine releases, potentially narrowing users' experiences and creating unhealthy patterns. The discussion covers the neurochemistry of pleasure, explaining how the same brain mechanisms activated by problemati...

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In this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show, psychologist Henry Cloud explores the delicate balance of addressing relationship problems while preserving emotional connection. He examines how to separate behaviors from personal worth, and ways to provide feedback without damaging self-esteem or injecting contempt into important relationships. Dr. Cloud walks through practical applications with callers facing common challenges: a wife seek...

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In this episode, Dr. Cloud examines the concept of incremental progress—explaining why personal growth happens little by little rather than all at once. The discussion covers how consistent small steps contribute to progress when dealing with depression, anxiety, relationship challenges, and health concerns. Dr. Cloud speaks with callers about establishing family boundaries after trauma, addressing chronic headaches in teenagers, a...

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In this first episode of the new year, Dr. Cloud explores the architecture of personal resilience, using the metaphor of building a house to explain how people can strengthen their ability to cope with life's challenges. The episode opens with a thoughtful discussion about the devastating fires in Los Angeles, transitioning into an exploration of how people can build emotional resilience. Dr. Cloud addresses boundaries...

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Much of your thinking is automatic, and that can be a great thing. No one needs to analyze every stroke of the toothbrush, so to speak. The problem, Dr. Henry Cloud contends, is when we default to thinking patterns that don’t work for situations that require us to be more considered and deliberate with our minds. One of the issues is that automatic thinking can lead to deeply ingrained patterns of behavior that self-re...

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Dr. Cloud discusses the concept of time management from a different perspective. He argues that rather than managing time itself, which is finite and unchangeable, the focus should be on how we manage ourselves within that time. Dr. Cloud identifies common reasons people may not use their time effectively, such as feeling emotionally isolated, having poor boundaries in saying no to requests, and excessive perfectionism...

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On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show:

 

Dr. Cloud explores criticism and its role in personal growth and relationships. He argues that when done with the right approach, criticism can be an act of love that facilitates positive change. Dr. Cloud provides tips on giving and receiving criticism effectively. He emphasizes specificity over global statements, using "I" statements, setting a positive tone, maki...

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Dr. Cloud presents 10 tips to help individuals navigate through difficult times in a practical and actionable manner. He emphasizes the importance of seeking professional help when needed, but also offers self-care strategies to alleviate temporary distress. Key points include combating isolation, focusing on what's within one's control, setting boundaries, processing grief, challenging catastrophic thinking, practicin...

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Dr. Cloud explores the idea that achieving anything of value in life requires doing things we don't want to do. He draws from personal experiences, such as pulling an all-nighter to meet a book deadline, and uses relatable examples like losing weight or building a successful marriage. Dr. Cloud emphasizes that embracing this mindset – that discomfort and effort are necessary for growth – is crucial. He touches on paren...

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Ever feel like apologizing isn’t working? In this thought-provoking talk, Dr. Cloud delves into the art of offering a sincere and effective apology. He emphasizes that a genuine apology is a powerful tool for repairing and strengthening relationships. Dr. Cloud breaks down the essential components of a good apology, including expressing empathy, taking ownership without making excuses, acknowledging the consequences, a...

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Dr. Cloud provides guidance for couples struggling to reignite their romantic spark. Drawing from biblical wisdom and psychological expertise, he explores the natural seasons of marriage and offers strategies to reignite passion. He encourages couples to reflect on how they prioritized careers over their relationship, examine psychological factors behind this shift, and revisit activities that fostered initial connecti...

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