Dad Starting Over

In this episode, I respond to a listener email from a man whose wife left him after 33 years of marriage. She had an affair, moved 2,000 miles away, and says she’s finally living for herself. Is this midlife crisis? Perimenopause? Or just long-simmering resentment finally boiling over? I break it all down—and more importantly, talk about what men can do when blindsided like this.

Submit your own story to Deardso.com
Join...

Most of the guys who find their way to my videos have two things in common: their relationship is falling apart… and their brain feels like a blender stuck on “purée.”

Turns out, a huge number of men struggling with marriage or divorce also have undiagnosed ADHD. In this video, I break down the real signs of adult ADHD in men—no TikTok self-diagnosing nonsense—and show how it wrecks your relationships, ramps up obsession, f...

A guy books an emergency coaching call. Says his marriage is hanging by a thread. He's sleeping in the guest room. She won’t talk to him. Full panic mode.

Then when we finally meet?
 “Oh… never mind. We had sex last night. I think we’re good now.”

Let me tell you something, fellas — if a single act of pity sex is enough to make you cancel your plan to fix your marriage… then the marriage was never getting fixed in the fir...

You ever catch yourself stuck in a mental loop? Replaying the breakup, the betrayal, the one thing she said that cut deep?

That’s rumination — and it’s not helping you heal.

In this video, I explain what rumination really is, why your brain gets stuck there, and how to break out of the loop before it drives you insane. We’ll look at the neuroscience, the psychology, and — most importantly — real ways to stop obsessing and st...

This letter hit hard.

A woman writes in to share her story: 20 years of marriage. Zero sex. She thought he had a medical issue. Turns out, he was sleeping with nearly 100 sex workers behind her back. And now… he wants to reconcile.

In this video, I break down what’s really going on here—from the psychology behind sex addiction and shame, to the heartbreaking reality of codependency and emotional devastation.

This story isn’t ...

Men ask me all the time: “Why can’t I stop thinking about her past?” You know she had a life before you… but that doesn’t stop your brain from obsessing over every ex, every hookup, every “what if.”

This is retroactive jealousy. And it’s more common — and more damaging — than most guys realize.

In this episode, I’ll explain the science behind it, how it messes with your head, and what you can do to finally get some peace. Th...

Why does it feel like the therapist is always on your case, even when your wife is the one shutting down emotionally?

In this video, I explain why anxious men—like many of you—end up being the focus in therapy sessions... and it’s not because the therapist is against you. It's because you're actually the one most likely to change and grow.

We’ll talk science, psychology, and real-life patterns I’ve seen in hundreds of men wh...

A lot of men joke about single women dying alone with 12 cats... but here’s the truth: that’s projection.

Men are facing a loneliness crisis. We isolate ourselves, chase careers across the country, let friendships die, and pretend we’re fine being “lone wolves.” Then we wake up in our 40s, 50s, and 60s and realize—we’ve built a resume, not a life.

In this video, I break down why so many men end up disconnected, how modern cu...

Most men carry shame. But they don’t talk about it—especially when it comes to sex.

They were raised to be "good boys," "nice guys," and "respectful partners"... but underneath that, many are dealing with something toxic: sexual shame. It wrecks their confidence. It kills their desire. And it silently poisons their relationships.

In this video, I break down how sexual shame develops in men, how it fuels codependency and dead...

Dating after divorce is a minefield—and if you haven't been single since your twenties, you're stepping into a completely different world.

In this video, I break down what actually happens when men re-enter the dating market after a long-term relationship. I cover the emotional aftermath of divorce, the brutal realities of modern dating apps, what women are looking for now, and how to rebuild yourself into a man who wins in...

Every man has felt it—that wild rush of lust, energy, and connection in the beginning of a relationship. You can’t stop thinking about her. You’re having sex like teenagers. It feels like you finally “found the one.”

That’s the honeymoon stage… and it’s biology.

In this episode, I break down what’s really going on inside your body (and hers) during the early phase of a relationship—dopamine, oxytocin, testosterone, all of it...

In this Dear DSO, a military husband opens up about his wife emotionally and physically checking out of their marriage. After three kids, mood swings, and now being on SSRIs for anxiety, she’s not the same woman he married. No sex for nine months. He does 95% of the parenting while she’s glued to her phone and in nursing school. Is he being anxious… or is it time to walk?

We talk about the mental health toll, the “mom bot” ...

A 65-year-old woman wrote in with a gut-wrenching story. After 42 years of being married to a man who never listens, never remembers their anniversary, and always puts his own priorities first, she's wondering if it's time to finally walk away.

She’s tried everything—even picked up The Dead Bedroom Fix hoping for one last Hail Mary. But this story? It’s way too familiar. Men, if you think women don’t deal with this kind of ...

In this Dear DSO submission, a man reaches out from the middle of an eight-year sexless marriage. He’s passive, anxious, and paralyzed by confusion—and he’s not alone. So many men fall into this trap.

In this episode, I walk through his message and break down what’s really going on here: the anxious attachment, the avoidant wife, the therapy cycles that go nowhere, and the desperation that leads men to stay stuck for years....

Seventeen years of marriage. Three kids. Nice house. Dead bedroom for almost a decade.
 Then, during an argument, she looks him in the eye and says the words that’ll haunt him forever:
 “I’m just not attracted to you anymore.”

No yelling. No drama. Just a calm, matter-of-fact gut punch.

This is what happens when a woman has emotionally and physically checked out — and finally wants you to get the message.
 In today’...

Why do so many women in long-term relationships cheat—and often with men who seem like total losers?

In this video, I break down the science behind two popular theories about female infidelity: the Mate Switching Hypothesis and the Dual Mating Strategy. One of these is more “romantic.” The other is... well, it’s the one most men fear deep down.

We’ll look at the latest research—including a 2024 study co-authored by Macken Mu...