The Small Bow Podcast

Welcome to the Small Bow Podcast. I’m your host, A.J. Daulerio. This is a show about expanding the definition of recovery, where we talk to writers, entertainers, recovering addicts, recovering jerks, and even the occasional normal person — about their struggles with love, sex, money, loneliness, shame, grief, drugs, alcohol, ego, identity, fame, and other fun things. Whatever is bringing you down, you might find something here that you didn’t know you needed. In addition to this podcast, the Small Bow is also a newsletter and recovery community that I started in 2018 to chronicle my own path toward sobriety and sanity following multiple rehab stints and a very public ordeal in which I was a co-defendant in Gawker's groundbreaking legal trial against professional wrestler Hulk Hogan for publishing a portion of his sex tape. A Florida jury voted in favor of Hogan and awarded him $115 million, which bankrupted the company and torched my former life. But out of the ashes of that ordeal grew the Small Bow. If you like what we do, consider subscribing to our newsletter and joining our community. We publish essays, interviews and other musings on recovery, and have online recovery support meetings seven days a week. Sign up for the Small Bow newsletter & community at: http://www.thesmallbow.com IG: @smallbowmedia

Episodes

“The Ground Hurts” | Hard Lessons with Comedian Nick Thune

October 7, 2026 • 84 mins

From a rehab that burned down to a fall from a second story window, Nick Thune has escaped death many times. He’s found a way to tell his story that makes space for the terror he felt in the depths of addiction and the compassion he now feels for the person he used to be. Nick spins a good yarn, and there’s a lot of those in this episode— featuring broken limbs, petting babies, gang leaders, and much more. Plus, w...

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I Was an Oddball Who Wanted to Be Loved | Rainn Wilson

September 30, 2026 • 58 mins

Rainn Wilson is best-known for his role as Dwight Schrute on The Office and his Soul Boom Podcast. He’s a serious, thoughtful guy who had the strange experience of becoming an international celebrity almost overnight. We talk about how the experience of sudden fame dovetailed with his addiction and how AA and a return to his Bahai faith have helped him to find his footing again. Plus, we discuss his recent OCD diagnosis, why ...

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Jim James on Relinquishing Control and Making Peace with Death

September 23, 2026 • 61 mins

Please Note: This episode discusses heavy themes, including suicide and mental health struggles. If you are experiencing distress, please utilize the free, confidential resources below. United States & Canada: Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. International: Find free, immediate support lines specific to your country at https://findahelpline.com If you are in the music industry, you can contact B...

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Yassir Lester Doesn’t Want the Phone to Ring

September 16, 2026 • 67 mins

Have you ever jumped when the phone rings? Yassir Lester does it every time. The writer and comedian (Girls, Black Monday, The Carmichael Show) stops by for a conversation about anxiety, success, growing up poor and how to deal with the fear of surprise. Plus, we talk about why quitting drinking made him a better comedian and the fuzzy line between being courageous and being reckless. I could talk to Yassir for hours, this is a fun...

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I Spent My Sober Anniversary Avoiding a Video of Perez Hilton | Carey O’Donnell

September 9, 2026 • 49 mins

Carey O’Donnell celebrated 10 years of continuous sobriety on the same day Perez Hilton bloodied himself on TikTok Live. Perfect time to come on this show and talk about anniversaries, celebrities and the gnarlier side of addiction. Carey and I both experienced our darkest moments in New York and this episode is full of those memories: 42 minute train delays, yelling your opinion at book club and hoping no one notices, the sh...

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Tough Love Would Have Killed Me | Erin Khar on Parenting in Recovery

September 2, 2026 • 61 mins

This is an episode about parenting and recovery. How do I talk to my kids about my own story? How do I protect them from repeating my mistakes? How do I give them the feeling of safety that I didn’t have when I was young? What do I do if I recognize patterns of behavior in them, that I’ve tried to fix in myself? Erin Khar is a writer and advocate. She’s the author of the memoir Strung Out and the advice column Ask...

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Tommy Rosen on the Alignment Between Yoga and 12-Step

August 26, 2026 • 76 mins

Sometimes I think I either want to join a cult or start a cult. Tommy Rosen definitely has cult leader charisma, but if you peel back that air of authority, you realize he’s just a guy that’s been seriously kicked around by life and arrived at a place where he wants to help as many people as possible. Tommy is the founder of Recovery 2.0, an organization that hosts Yoga-informed Recovery workshops and retreats all over ...

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How do I stay in the moment when my phone is addictive?

August 19, 2026 • 64 mins

This week, Kathryn Jezer-Morton joins the show to talk about emotional sobriety and the internet. Kathryn writes about digital culture and parenting for many publications, including her fantastic biweekly column for The Cut called “Brooding.” Her new book on social media is called The Story of Your Life. Emotional sobriety is this term that gets used to describe how we manage and regulate difficult emotions without our ...

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Latex, Throwing Bacon and Bad Corpse Makeup with Anna Holmes

August 12, 2026 • 56 mins

Anna Holmes could walk into any newsroom and immediately run the show. She created and ran Jezebel while I was at Gawker and her writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The New Yorker and The New York Times, where she formerly wrote the weekly “Work Friend” column for the Sunday Business Section. But as we discuss in this interview, she still struggles with feelings of inadequacy. In this conversation, we discuss Anna&rsq...

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God Can’t Help You Until You Get Out of the Way

August 5, 2026 • 55 mins

Queen Conny is 96 years old and not afraid to die. She gets angry, she holds onto grudges and she has no tolerance for liars. She’s also got 18 virtual reality boyfriends and killer style. She’s been sober for 48 years and while she hasn’t always loved AA, she credits it with changing her relationship with God. This is NOT a conversation about aging gracefully. It’s a conversation about getting older and acc...

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Opening the Doors on a Real Recovery Meeting

July 29, 2026 • 66 mins

This week on The Small Bow Podcast, you’re invited to join us for a Small Bow Meeting. A Small Bow Meeting is not a 12-step meeting, but we rip off most of their format. It is not necessary for participants to identify as an alcoholic or addict. This meeting is open to people who suffer from issues related to mental illness, drugs, love, sex, food, debt, codependency, inadequacy, or anything else that’s bringing you dow...

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If You’re Searching For Heaven, Go Home | Swamp Dogg on the Afterlife

July 22, 2026 • 47 mins

Swamp Dogg is a country, soul and R&B singer, musician, songwriter and record producer. He has influenced multiple generations of musicians with his defiantly idiosyncratic discography and has been described by Pitchfork as one of “pop’s great cult acts.” He also happens to sing The Small Bow theme song. He stopped by the studio to discuss his long career, his lifelong search for happiness, and his new album S...

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Megan Koester Is A Great Writer. Why Isn’t She Writing?

July 15, 2026 • 57 mins

Megan Koester is a writer and stand-up comedian who isn’t writing and won’t promote her stand-up. In my opinion, she should be doing more of both of those things but hey, it’s not up to me. I wanted to have Megan back on the show to talk about self-sabotage and becoming your own worst enemy. Plus, being an atheist in recovery rooms, EMDR and weaponized trauma and how to use craigslist ephemera as self-promotion. ...

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Richard Rushfield Has Power in Hollywood. Just Don’t Tell Him That.

July 8, 2026 • 51 mins

When I want to know what’s going on in Hollywood, I turn to Richard Rushfield. Richard is a columnist for the Ankler, his influential newsletter about the state of the entertainment industry. He is also sober, and decided to stop by our show on his 30th sobriety anniversary. We talk about how sobriety has changed his work ethic and made him more comfortable in his own skin. We also discuss the state of sobriety in Hollywood: ...

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We Fear Connection More Than Loss: Audience Q&A with Peaceful John

July 1, 2026 • 45 mins

For this episode of The Small Bow Podcast, my friend Peaceful John joins the show to answer some of your questions about recovery. It should be obvious pretty quickly why I call him Peaceful John. We talk about how to set boundaries with aging parents, how to avoid turning your grief into a weapon, how to care less, how to feel more… basically how to deal with your own sh*t. Thanks to everyone who wrote in (I may have snuck ...

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To Write a Book about Family, Mary H. K. Choi Had to First Look at Her Own

June 24, 2026 • 56 mins

Mary H. K. Choi stops by the show for our annual meeting of the dead dads club and a conversation about her new book Pool House. We discuss the major changes in Mary’s life that informed the writing of this book, including her autism diagnosis and the loss of her dad, and the ways that this round of self-promotion has led to new appreciation for her community. Plus, why 12-step is genius, why 20 year-olds are awesome and why ...

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Death, Sex and Recovery: A Conversation with Anna Sale

June 17, 2026 • 51 mins

Death, Sex and Money is where I go for a jolt of connection to something bigger than myself. Anna Sale hosts that show and is also the author of the book Let’s Talk About Hard Things. On this episode, we talk about the moment Anna realized she didn’t understand death nearly as much as she thought she did. We also get into the origins of Death, Sex and Money and the role that Anna’s visit to recovery rooms in Brook...

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Ryan O'Connell on the Strange Sensation of Finally Being Seen

June 10, 2026 • 53 mins

Ryan O’Connell had an uncommon path to fame. After starting as a blogger in New York, he wrote a TV script about his life as a young, gay man with Cerebral Palsy. When the show was picked up by Netflix, the network insisted he star in it as well. Now that Special is in the rearview mirror, Ryan has gone back to his roots as a writer. He has a new book of essays out, called Inspiration Porn, which describes his life in Hollywo...

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Langhorne Slim Wanted to Flee. Then He Became a Father.

June 3, 2026 • 58 mins

Turns out Langhorne Slim and I have a lot in common. We both grew up in the Philly suburbs, we spent formative creative years in New York and we became dads in our forties. We’re also both in recovery. Langhorne’s got a new album out called The Dreaming Kind and he stopped by the studio to chat before playing a show at the Troubadour in LA. In this episode, we talk about the ways we’ve both struggled with the idea...

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Dopey Dave on Ego, Success and Why "More" is the Hardest Drug to Quit

May 27, 2026 • 45 mins

Dave Manheim (host of the Dopey Podcast) comes back on the show to drop some Dopey wisdom. We talk about ego, ambition, control issues, slowing down and how to be of service, self-servingly. Plus, what I learned from losing my wallet and why Dave hates the movie Inside Out. New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Smal...

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The Small Bow Podcast

Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}“The Ground Hurts” | Hard Lessons with Comedian Nick Thune

.css-r6mb8g{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:1;overflow:hidden;}I Was an Oddball Who Wanted to Be Loved | Rainn Wilson

Jim James on Relinquishing Control and Making Peace with Death

Yassir Lester Doesn’t Want the Phone to Ring

I Spent My Sober Anniversary Avoiding a Video of Perez Hilton | Carey O’Donnell

Tough Love Would Have Killed Me | Erin Khar on Parenting in Recovery

Tommy Rosen on the Alignment Between Yoga and 12-Step

How do I stay in the moment when my phone is addictive?

Latex, Throwing Bacon and Bad Corpse Makeup with Anna Holmes

God Can’t Help You Until You Get Out of the Way

Opening the Doors on a Real Recovery Meeting

If You’re Searching For Heaven, Go Home | Swamp Dogg on the Afterlife

Megan Koester Is A Great Writer. Why Isn’t She Writing?

Richard Rushfield Has Power in Hollywood. Just Don’t Tell Him That.

We Fear Connection More Than Loss: Audience Q&A with Peaceful John

To Write a Book about Family, Mary H. K. Choi Had to First Look at Her Own

Death, Sex and Recovery: A Conversation with Anna Sale

Ryan O'Connell on the Strange Sensation of Finally Being Seen

Langhorne Slim Wanted to Flee. Then He Became a Father.

Dopey Dave on Ego, Success and Why "More" is the Hardest Drug to Quit

Popular Podcasts

“The Ground Hurts” | Hard Lessons with Comedian Nick Thune

I Was an Oddball Who Wanted to Be Loved | Rainn Wilson