All Episodes

May 15, 2020 4 mins
Skeery tries to sell the "Sham Wow" as the incredibly obnoxious salesperson, Mr. Michael Oppenheimer!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mark as Played
Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Dance phone, Elvis d Elvis Durant phontat all right, scary?

Speaker 2 (00:05):
What's it all about?

Speaker 1 (00:06):
Well, Anthony emailed us wanting to phone tap both his parents.
They're retired and they get bombarded with robocalls every afternoon,
so they wanted me to call at mister Michael Oppenheimer
with that whole did.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
You know scary?

Speaker 1 (00:20):
Back in the day, he would date girls and they
would ask for him to use the Michael Oppenheimer voice
when they were having sex.

Speaker 2 (00:24):
And no, I don't even believe that's.

Speaker 3 (00:28):
How did that go? Scary?

Speaker 2 (00:28):
How did that go?

Speaker 3 (00:30):
Okay?

Speaker 2 (00:31):
Anyway, So here we go Scary's photo. Here we go. Hello,
good afternoon. This is mister Michael Oppenheimer for sham Well.
How are you doing today? Miz? Good time.

Speaker 3 (00:41):
But we're not interested.

Speaker 2 (00:43):
The sham well is like a towel and a sponge
all in one.

Speaker 3 (00:46):
No, I'm not interested.

Speaker 2 (00:48):
Do you have a dog or a cat? No? For
nineteen dollars and ninety five cents, we'll give you you serious.

Speaker 3 (00:53):
That's a that's a meal.

Speaker 2 (00:55):
I'll give you eight sham Wells for that price.

Speaker 3 (00:57):
Hold on, yes, waste your time trying to sell us something.
We're not gonna buy. Move on to the next person.
That's what it's all Workinger does.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
A good afternoon, sir. My name is mister Michael Oppenheimer.
With sham Well, the product that will make you say.

Speaker 3 (01:11):
Oh about the pitch. We'll not buy it.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
You can clean up spills fast.

Speaker 3 (01:15):
Hey, Hey, I can guarantee you I wouldn't buy a
save these beds from you.

Speaker 2 (01:20):
Do you know that you can use them over and
over and over and they'll last for years.

Speaker 3 (01:24):
Somebody say it, no, and you know you ain't gonna
get the sale, Give up, Go to the next person.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
Do you know this offer is not available in stores?

Speaker 3 (01:32):
If you gave you a ton of gold for two cents,
I would buy it.

Speaker 2 (01:35):
Move What if I doubled your order? So give you
four large I don't want it, four large sham wales,
and I'll give you four mini sham wales for free. No,
it's like a towel, but it's a sponge all in one.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
I don't believe it.

Speaker 2 (01:49):
No, it holds twenty times. It's waiting liquor.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
No, it sucks.

Speaker 2 (01:53):
No, No, it's machine washing.

Speaker 3 (01:55):
I hate it. Nor.

Speaker 2 (02:00):
My name is mister.

Speaker 3 (02:01):
Michaelheim, supervisor. Why do you want to get a supervisor.
Why us I was told to me your supervisor.

Speaker 2 (02:10):
I was told to sell.

Speaker 3 (02:11):
These sixty alcohol cops. Move on. Put somebody else, all right?
Put not go away? Man?

Speaker 2 (02:21):
What if I cut the price in half?

Speaker 3 (02:22):
Away? Yes, your head.

Speaker 2 (02:25):
Cleans up, spills fast, sir, stompy.

Speaker 3 (02:28):
Hello, telemarkers, ain't too break this afternoon.

Speaker 2 (02:33):
This is mister Michael Oppenheimer.

Speaker 3 (02:35):
You know what I used to tell TheMark myself.

Speaker 2 (02:37):
Stop it, give it a try, and you'll be saying,
oh wow to the Shamwell.

Speaker 3 (02:42):
What do you like?

Speaker 2 (02:43):
This is?

Speaker 3 (02:43):
You have no life. I know you ain't got no
girlfriends or nothing, because you wouldn't be. It would be
all this time.

Speaker 2 (02:49):
I'll give you eight sham walls for nineteen dollars and
ninety five.

Speaker 3 (02:52):
Shoved up shams up your throat and your weekend really
been slowly. You've got nothing at home, like even television,
something a walk. You gotta call people up in bag
like this. I don't think you go to bed at
the halfway house right now.

Speaker 2 (03:05):
He won't scratch any surface.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
Your life is so up. I'm the only thing to
support in your life right now? What do you I mean?
What does your deal you.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
Want a list of people to be called today, sir,
that's all.

Speaker 3 (03:16):
Oh you called the eighteen times you live.

Speaker 2 (03:19):
At me Exhibit no Boulevard Sir? Do you not?

Speaker 3 (03:22):
Don't you make up? God to me? I'll get this
whole place looking for you.

Speaker 2 (03:26):
My name is mister Michael Oppenheimer, and I have your
son right here on the phone.

Speaker 3 (03:31):
Does Oh you sons a bitches?

Speaker 2 (03:35):
Michael. This is Scary Jones with Elvis Duran and the
Morning Show.

Speaker 3 (03:40):
I love you you guys, who look you call me
halfway bust? Oh, dad's all.

Speaker 2 (03:49):
Drunk getting phone tapped.

Speaker 1 (03:51):
I love that when you pull a phone tap on
your parents and they find out it's you.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
It's the first thing he says. I love you. If
that's gonna you out there. This phone tab was pre
recorded with permission granted by all the party sudents.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
The Elvis Duran phone tab were only on Elvis Duran
in the Morning Show.
Advertise With Us

Popular Podcasts

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!

Stuff You Should Know

Stuff You Should Know

If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.

Dateline NBC

Dateline NBC

Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com

Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.

Connect

© 2025 iHeartMedia, Inc.