I'm Too Old For These Games

Dear Steve and Shirley, I am a 57 year old very attractive widow. I started back dating four years ago, after giving myself time to deal with the loss of my husband. Over a year ago, I met a really nice man at a bar and he told me I was gorgeous and he’d love to take me to dinner. We went on our first date and I was hooked! He told me he was looking for a deep sexual connection and whoever he was with, he would treat her like a queen.............

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. If you
need advice on relationships, on dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,
Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com
and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your
letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read
this one right here, right now. That's for you, Jay,

(00:22):
Thanks so much. Bugle hold on tight, We got it
for you here. It is a Strawberry Letter. Subjects I'm
too old for these games. Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a
fifty seven year old, very attractive widow. I started back
dating four years ago after giving myself time to deal
with the loss of my husband. Over a year ago.

(00:43):
I met a really nice man at a bar and
he told me I was gorgeous and he'd love to
take me to dinner. We went on our first date
and I was hooked. He told me he was looking
for a deep sexual connection and whoever he was with
he would treat her like a quick For our second date,
I met him at his home or should I say

(01:04):
a state. He had a He has a very plush
lifestyle and three luxury cars. He surprised me with dinner
at his house with a private chef, and after that
we made love. He let me know that he would
cater to all of my wants and needs and take
me on many adventures. The next week, he invited me
to travel overseas with him on a business trip. Since

(01:28):
we met, he has taken me on several deluxe trips
and I am treated like a princess when we're together.
He is sixty three years old and divorced, so I
thought he was interested in building a great relationship with
He must have felt huh, I had flashed back, Oh,
you're sixty three. He's sixty three years old, and nobody

(01:52):
like the go ahead, don't you. I'm just try and
deal with it, just you know, you know, please don't
listen to Jay. He's sixty three years old and divorced,

(02:13):
so I thought he was interested in building a great
relationship with me. He must have felt that I was
getting too caught up, so he sat me down one
day and let me know that our quote unquote arrangement
only works if I know my place. He said, I
should stay beautiful, be ready to travel, and always ready
to satisfy him sexually. I was so hurt and upset.

(02:34):
He gave me no signs that he was an old player.
Now I've fallen for him and I don't want to
stop seeing him. Should I take what I can get
at my age or should I end this and forget
these those great trips? Well, um, I gotta disagree with
you because he set it up front. He set it
up front. He was looking for a deep sexual connection.

(02:58):
He said that. He said that plane is day to you. Yeah,
you got caught up. But to answer your question, I
just think that you know you should get what you want.
If this is not what you want, don't settle. It
doesn't have anything to do with how old you are
anything like that. I mean, just because he's rich and

(03:18):
he can afford to take you on these exotic trips
and all of this and do whatever. It doesn't mean
that he owns you. It doesn't mean that he can
run you, doesn't mean any of that. You're a grown woman,
and if it's a relationship you want and need, then
that's what you should have. It just won't be with him.
It just will not be with mister sixty three years
old and divorced taking you everywhere. It's not going to

(03:41):
be with him because He told you he wanted a
sexual connection, a deep sexual connection. You know, you cannot
have it both ways with this man. It's either his
way or no way. He's already told you to know
your place in this arrangement. He's called it an arrangement.
He's giving you all these words. The signs are there,
all of them are there. Some women would happily and gladly,

(04:05):
you know, deal with this so called arrangement. They would
be happy to go on all these exotic trips and
have to do nothing but look beautiful. But this situation
is not for you. You're in love and you want
instead of a deep sexual connection with him, you want
a relationship, possibly to lead to a marriage and all that.
So this is not for you. So yes, I say

(04:26):
to you, and this, forget all those great trips and
all of that, because you're not going to be able
to do this with him, because he's not looking for
what you're looking for. Right now. You want more and
you probably deserve it, So do what you gotta do.
Let this one go, Steve, I don't I don't understand
the confusion. Shirley said it. He told you at the beginning.

(04:51):
See here, let me, let me let me help you
understand something. You're fifty seven, very attractive. Wittall started back
to Dayton f years ago, four years ago, after you
gave yourself time to deal with the loss of your husband,
meaning your husband passed. Then about a year ago, you
met this man at a bar right there. Most fifty

(05:13):
year old people don't really meet nice people at bars,
no more. At just ain't the stomping ground normally, unless
you run up into an old businessman that's on an
old business trip. And there's other people at the balls
who know to go to the balls for such a
evening and the day of those are called girls. Anyway,

(05:36):
he told me that you was gorgeous and he'd loved
take you to dinner. So on the first date, you
were hooked seating Now right there, you said, on the
first date, I was hooked on what y'all just eight?
But let me tell you what he told me. He

(05:58):
was looking for a d sexual connection, and whoever he
was with he would treat like a queen. Here's what
you heard. Treat like a queen. He did that. But
let me help you understand something. For we go to
break when a man tells you that he wants a
deep sexual connection. What deep sexual connection actually means is

(06:28):
no other connection. When a man says I want a
deep sexual connection, parentheses, no other connection is what that means.
That's it. Okay, we'll have part two of your response
coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour, subject
I'm too old for these games. We'll get back into

(06:51):
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(07:32):
come on, let's recap today's strawberry letters. Subject I'm too
old for these games. It's not a game. Ma'am, you didn't.
You didn't. You didn't. You weren't listening. It's sad to say,
but a lot of people don't listen. You're fifty seven,
very attractive, with old started dating again. You met this
man at a bar. He was really nice. He told

(07:53):
you you were gorgeous. He'd loved to take me to dinner.
You went on your first date. I was hooked. One date, Bam,
you gone. You was gone. On the first day. He
told me he was looking for a deep sexual connection
and whoever he was with, he would treat like a queen.

(08:14):
You heard, whoever he was with, he would treat like
a queen. You ignored the deep sexual connection and what
he wanted. He was clear that whoever he got up
with to have this deep sexual connection, that he would

(08:35):
treat you like a queen. So on your second date,
I went to his home or should I say a state.
I'm a I'm know what that means with okay, lady.
He has a very plush lifestyle and three luxury cause.
So you in the garage, you looking at them setting sheets.

(09:01):
You're sitting on a velvet couch, and you looking at
gold trim on the woodwork. So after that, he had dinner,
He had a private chef, and we made love just
like that one two damn plates of food, took you

(09:25):
to dinner, brought you to his house. Your ass was nicky.
He could have you would have slept with him the
first night because you was hooked then, but you waited
two nights. Whoa, oh girl, you you You made him
earn it. He let me know that he would cater
to all your wants and needs and take me on

(09:46):
many adventures. The man so far has not lied. Next
week he invited me to travel overseas better quick going
with them trips? Yes, Corona. Next week he invited me
to travel overseas with him on a business trip. Since
we met, you've been on several deluxe trips. What is
a deluxe trip? What is that? We've been on several

(10:11):
deluxe trips? No, no, no, no no, what is it? Ja?
What is a deluxe trip? It's a it's a big,
big trip. It's a huge like it's like you see
you gonna take a trip, but it's bigger than that, Okay, bigger.
So they was on a big plane and they was

(10:33):
up front in first class into big chairs. All right,
And I'm treated like a princess when we together. He's
sixty three years old and divorced, so I thought he
was interested in building a great relationship with me. Where
did that thought come from, ma'am? Because he said he
was looking for a deep sexual connection parentheses, which means
no other connections. And he told you he treats you

(10:55):
like a queen. You thought being treated like a queen
was a relationship. Now he was just gonna give you
some things, take you on some deluxe trips and stuff
like that. That's all it was. He must have felt
that I was getting too caught up, so he set
me down one day. Then let me know that our
arrangement only works if I know my place. He said,

(11:17):
I should stay beautiful, be ready to travel, and always
ready to satisfy him sexually, because he walks a deep
sexual connection and he likes it from you because you're
an attractive woman and he treats you like a queen.
I was so hurting upset. He gave me no signs
that he was an old player. Listen to me, He's

(11:39):
not an old player. He told you exactly what was upfront.
Here's the news that you don't know. You are one
of several, you're not the one. You're one of several.
The reason he's so smiled with the presentation is because
he's made this presentation several times and it has worked.

(12:06):
He finds attractive women who are lonely like you, and
he subdues them for sex, for deep sexual connections. That's
all he wanted from you. In return, he treats you
very well. So he thought he puts you in the pocket.
That's all you just got put in the pocket. It's

(12:27):
a lot of y'all out there. You ain't the only one,
but you thought that he wanted to be building a
great relationship with you. That's what he tells you. Now.
Now I fall in for him and I don't want
to stop seeing him. Should I take what I can
get at my age? Or should I end this and
forget those great trips? Hold up? Are you talking in circles?

(12:48):
Because everything you're saying just gets back to still seeing him.
First of all, lady, let's just be d you're not
gonna stop seeing him because you just said I don't
want to stop seeing him trips? Should I take what
I can get at my age? Don't put this on
your age. It's just what you want to take because
you like it, or should I end this and forget
those great trips? Lady. I can't tell you what to do,

(13:13):
but he's not building or any further relationship with you.
And I want to remind you that men don't give promotions.
When we want you as the one you start at
number one, we don't do promotions. I'm sorry, man, don't
forget a man, don't forget. Don't forget to check out

(13:35):
the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand now coming up at
forty six minutes after the hour of the Democratic Debate
will happen this Sunday, but there will be a few changes.
We'll tell you about those right after this. You're listening
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