Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more.
Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com
by clicking clicking submit Strawberry Letter. Okay, And we could
be reading your letter live on the air. Say submit
(00:24):
your Strawberry letter by clicking submit Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Okay, there you go.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
That's what I've meant. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're going to read
this one right here, right now. And you never know,
this one could be yours.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
You never know. Buckle up and hold on tight. We
got it. Poor you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Thank you, nephew. Subject It's not a big deal at all,
Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been married for eight years, and
I've been faking it for ten years. We met when
I was twenty two years old, and I had nothing
to compare the intimacy to, so it was fine. He
was my first and only man for ten long years.
Then a month ago, my good friend had a bachelorette
(01:07):
party and she had mail strippers there. The strippers were
scrawny and couldn't dance, so we laughed at them. Then
a big black stripper showed up and said he got lost.
He went to the back and got oiled up, and
lordy Lottie, when he came back in his thong, he
shut the whole party down. I couldn't stop staring. He
(01:29):
noticed me, and he gave me a lot of attention.
He whispered to me to relax because my whole body
was tensed up. The other six ladies darn near ripped
his underwear off, and he got offended and said he
was leaving. When he went to the back to put
his clothes on, I had to use the bathroom. He
saw me going into the bathroom and he asked if
(01:50):
he could wash his face before I used it. I
allowed him to use the bathroom first, since he was
so mad that the ladies attacked him. He teased me
about being very uptight and asked He asked if he
could help me unwind. I didn't know it would involve
his tongue and other things. I didn't stop him or
(02:11):
use common sense. I had the best sexual experience of
my life on the bathroom floor. He asked if we
could keep in touch, and I told him I was married.
He said he could see I was married, but I
could pay him to help me unwind whenever I needed. Here,
I am with my little, average sized husband, and I
have the big Stripperman's number in my phone. How bad
(02:35):
would it be if I cheated just one more time? Okay,
So you're asking permission or opinions from Steve and I
on what we think about you cheating on your husband again.
You want us to tell you how bad it would
be if you did it just one more time. Hmm.
I said that aloud two different ways, so maybe if
(02:57):
you heard it back you would understand how crazy all
this sounds. And married lady, you know we're not gonna
tell you. Yes, girl, go for it. Go for it.
One of the problems with going back for that one
more time, and anyone who has told you who anyone
who has done this gone back for that one more
(03:17):
time knows that at that moment you get hooked, okay,
and you keep going back, and you keep going back,
and every time is your last time. That's what you
always tell yourself. Okay, one more time, this is this
is the last time. But it doesn't stop. It won't
just be you know, one time your last time. It
(03:38):
won't just be that. I'm telling you right now. If
you're going to keep going and keep going and keep going, okay,
all I can tell you is that you are married.
Please remember that. Even though women are much better at
cheating than men, as a woman, I still say, don't
gamble with your marriage because you can lose, You can
(03:59):
lose everything. Instead of faking it with your husband, why
don't you talk to him about what you like and
kind of teach him how to please you. You guys were
really young when you got married. Instead of taking the
easy way out with cheating and paying paying for a
stripper to come by and please you, think about that, Steve.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
I normally don't do this, Sureley, but I'm gonna have
to start my letter with a statement. You just made
sit your husband down and tell him what you like? Yeah, now,
how this conversation gonna stuff?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Well? What I like? Well, if you was bigger and
dogs again.
Speaker 3 (04:46):
And I like other things tongue and some other things,
and oh that's what I like. I don't think she
can set her husband down and tell him what she liked,
because she didn't know she liked it till she left
the stripper. The bachelor party. That's not a good suggestion.
(05:13):
So now let's start the letter over. You've been mad
for eight years. Y'all met when you was twenty two,
you thirty at least right now. He was your first
and only man for ten years. Then a month ago
something happened. You went to a bachelorette party from strippers.
(05:33):
Was there, y'all was laughing at him, scrowny, couldn't dance.
Then El Domingo. Jango showed up.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
That's the name.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
Jango showed up in chains. Jango showed up lost because
he ain't got no GPS. Because Jango came to the
stripper party on a buck board.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
Pulled by a mute.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
Wow, that's how Jangle got lost. See you don't know
that Django ain't got no car or nothing. Jangle field hand.
Django came up in there with a bare lap shots on.
(06:21):
Django came up on there. That wasn't all. That was
just sweat from out in the fields. Django was next.
When I come back, I will tell you what happened
when Django came out the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
All right, hang on for part two of Steve's response,
coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's
strawberry letter. Subject is not a big deal at all.
We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening
Hardy Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve latreecap today's
strawberry letter. The subject it's not a big deal at all.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
This girl was twenty two when she met her husband,
been married for ten years. He's the only man she's
ever been with. Then about a month ago, one of
her girls had a bachelor party. So that means she's
thirty or thirty two. They've been together, married ten years.
We probably met him when she was twenty two, probably
dated for a couple of year. I probably she about
thirty two thirty four, went to the bachelor party. Some
(07:26):
strippers was there. Scrony couldn't dance. The women was laughing
at her. But one of them came in late. He
came in late be cause he was the big, beautiful
black dancer. They noticed he looked a little unruly because
he had on some bird lap shots. The reason he
(07:47):
got lost is because he don't have GPS. His name
was Django. Django came in on a buckboard poured by mule.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
Y'all say.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
He went in the back and got all up. That
wasn't all. That was sweat from the fields. He's a
field hand.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Jingo came out with his thong on and.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Lord, Lord, Lord, you found out what django meant. Jano
is an old African mean, Old African word. Django is
an old African word. It means dad go.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Is al.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
Django is an old African word, it means dad go,
And so they called him Jango, dad go. Jango came
out there and the women lost they mind. Djano shut
the party down. Jango was moving and the women damn
(08:50):
near toe his underwear off. He got upset because he
didn't sign up for that. So now Django is upset
and he finally get through. You had to go to
the bathroom, and he had to go to the bathroom,
and he saw you go down the hall way and
you was going in there and he said, he said,
(09:10):
do you mind if I washed my face face sweat?
He wanted to get it off because that wasn't all
he was using. It was actually corn husker's lotion. He
made it hisself. What world I'm building a story, Jingle
(09:31):
field hand, He made his own corn husky's lotion. He
don't like driving in it, so he wanted to wash
it off his face. Okay, So then he let you
in the bathroom and he noticed you was uptight. He
told you to relax. You was tense. He told you
that when he was trying to give you that lap
dan As you didn't want. But he rubbed Django up
against you. And now all of a sudden, you're in
(09:55):
that bathroom with Jingo. He said, look, you need to relax.
You want me to help you to relax, And you said,
uh huh. First you said, I'm not up tank. He said,
but I could feel the tension in your shoulders. And
he put them big hands on your shoulders, the one
that had been picking.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Y'all. I didn't say nothing.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
I just said their hands that he had been picking,
he hit those are his picking hands. They was rough,
but they were soft because they knew how to handle it.
And next thing you was caught up in it. He
was rubbing your shoulders and all of a sudden, Django
started pressing down on your shoulders, and next thing you know,
(10:40):
you was in the floor. Django bagged up, scooted up
against the door. Now your head is in a bent position.
It's up against the bath tub. Jango stretched out and
you said in your letter right here, I'm not making
this up, you said in your letter right here. No, no,
(11:02):
I didn't know it would involve his tongue and other things.
He said, well, little girl, I don't want to tell
you something. It was no other things in there. It
was just django.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Tongue, okay, And that was all it was.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
But he was such an expert at it. You thought
it was some more things in there. It was just
had one thing.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Looker. You just had never seen it like that before.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
And Django was in there bouty and then it was
the best sexual experience of my life. On the bathroom floor.
He asked if we could keep in touch. I told
him I was married. He said he could see you
was married, but you could pay him to help you
unwine whenever I needed it. Here I am with my
(11:53):
little advertised husband, and I had to beck the big
strip of man's number in my phone. How bad would
it be if I cheated one more time?
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Girl?
Speaker 3 (12:04):
Django is like a bag of laized potato chips. Yeah yeah, girl,
you ain't gonna be able to lead just one that
damn Jango came up in there with all that field
hand experience.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
With that homemade corn huskers loach because that jangle.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
Jango don't need gas money. Jango need oat money. He
gotta feed the mule. Oh God, that brings him from
gig to give.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Uh. Django is a jigglo and a male escort.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
You're about to be involved in an old profession called prostitution.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Don't do it, little girl. You ain't strong enough, all right?
Speaker 3 (12:57):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Leave your comments on today's Stop Letter on Instagram at
Steve Barb at them and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast.
Coming up next, it is Junior and Sports Talk. Right
after this, you're listening to Harvey Morning Show
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more.
Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com
by clicking clicking submit Strawberry Letter. Okay, And we could
be reading your letter live on the air. Say submit
(00:24):
your Strawberry letter by clicking submit Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Okay, there you go.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
That's what I've meant. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're going to read
this one right here, right now. And you never know,
this one could be yours.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
You never know. Buckle up and hold on tight. We
got it. Poor you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Thank you, nephew. Subject It's not a big deal at all,
Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been married for eight years, and
I've been faking it for ten years. We met when
I was twenty two years old, and I had nothing
to compare the intimacy to, so it was fine. He
was my first and only man for ten long years.
Then a month ago, my good friend had a bachelorette
(01:07):
party and she had mail strippers there. The strippers were
scrawny and couldn't dance, so we laughed at them. Then
a big black stripper showed up and said he got lost.
He went to the back and got oiled up, and
lordy Lottie, when he came back in his thong, he
shut the whole party down. I couldn't stop staring. He
(01:29):
noticed me, and he gave me a lot of attention.
He whispered to me to relax because my whole body
was tensed up. The other six ladies darn near ripped
his underwear off, and he got offended and said he
was leaving. When he went to the back to put
his clothes on, I had to use the bathroom. He
saw me going into the bathroom and he asked if
(01:50):
he could wash his face before I used it. I
allowed him to use the bathroom first, since he was
so mad that the ladies attacked him. He teased me
about being very uptight and asked He asked if he
could help me unwind. I didn't know it would involve
his tongue and other things. I didn't stop him or
(02:11):
use common sense. I had the best sexual experience of
my life on the bathroom floor. He asked if we
could keep in touch, and I told him I was married.
He said he could see I was married, but I
could pay him to help me unwind whenever I needed. Here,
I am with my little, average sized husband, and I
have the big Stripperman's number in my phone. How bad
(02:35):
would it be if I cheated just one more time? Okay,
So you're asking permission or opinions from Steve and I
on what we think about you cheating on your husband again.
You want us to tell you how bad it would
be if you did it just one more time. Hmm.
I said that aloud two different ways, so maybe if
(02:57):
you heard it back you would understand how crazy all
this sounds. And married lady, you know we're not gonna
tell you. Yes, girl, go for it. Go for it.
One of the problems with going back for that one
more time, and anyone who has told you who anyone
who has done this gone back for that one more
(03:17):
time knows that at that moment you get hooked, okay,
and you keep going back, and you keep going back,
and every time is your last time. That's what you
always tell yourself. Okay, one more time, this is this
is the last time. But it doesn't stop. It won't
just be you know, one time your last time. It
(03:38):
won't just be that. I'm telling you right now. If
you're going to keep going and keep going and keep going, okay,
all I can tell you is that you are married.
Please remember that. Even though women are much better at
cheating than men, as a woman, I still say, don't
gamble with your marriage because you can lose, You can
(03:59):
lose everything. Instead of faking it with your husband, why
don't you talk to him about what you like and
kind of teach him how to please you. You guys were
really young when you got married. Instead of taking the
easy way out with cheating and paying paying for a
stripper to come by and please you, think about that, Steve.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
I normally don't do this, Sureley, but I'm gonna have
to start my letter with a statement. You just made
sit your husband down and tell him what you like? Yeah, now,
how this conversation gonna stuff?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Well? What I like? Well, if you was bigger and
dogs again.
Speaker 3 (04:46):
And I like other things tongue and some other things,
and oh that's what I like. I don't think she
can set her husband down and tell him what she liked,
because she didn't know she liked it till she left
the stripper. The bachelor party. That's not a good suggestion.
(05:13):
So now let's start the letter over. You've been mad
for eight years. Y'all met when you was twenty two,
you thirty at least right now. He was your first
and only man for ten years. Then a month ago
something happened. You went to a bachelorette party from strippers.
(05:33):
Was there, y'all was laughing at him, scrowny, couldn't dance.
Then El Domingo. Jango showed up.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
That's the name.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
Jango showed up in chains. Jango showed up lost because
he ain't got no GPS. Because Jango came to the
stripper party on a buck board.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
Pulled by a mute.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
Wow, that's how Jangle got lost. See you don't know
that Django ain't got no car or nothing. Jangle field hand.
Django came up in there with a bare lap shots on.
(06:21):
Django came up on there. That wasn't all. That was
just sweat from out in the fields. Django was next.
When I come back, I will tell you what happened
when Django came out the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
All right, hang on for part two of Steve's response,
coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's
strawberry letter. Subject is not a big deal at all.
We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening
Hardy Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve latreecap today's
strawberry letter. The subject it's not a big deal at all.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
This girl was twenty two when she met her husband,
been married for ten years. He's the only man she's
ever been with. Then about a month ago, one of
her girls had a bachelor party. So that means she's
thirty or thirty two. They've been together, married ten years.
We probably met him when she was twenty two, probably
dated for a couple of year. I probably she about
thirty two thirty four, went to the bachelor party. Some
(07:26):
strippers was there. Scrony couldn't dance. The women was laughing
at her. But one of them came in late. He
came in late be cause he was the big, beautiful
black dancer. They noticed he looked a little unruly because
he had on some bird lap shots. The reason he
(07:47):
got lost is because he don't have GPS. His name
was Django. Django came in on a buckboard poured by mule.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
Y'all say.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
He went in the back and got all up. That
wasn't all. That was sweat from the fields. He's a
field hand.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Jingo came out with his thong on and.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Lord, Lord, Lord, you found out what django meant. Jano
is an old African mean, Old African word. Django is
an old African word. It means dad go.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Is al.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
Django is an old African word, it means dad go,
And so they called him Jango, dad go. Jango came
out there and the women lost they mind. Djano shut
the party down. Jango was moving and the women damn
(08:50):
near toe his underwear off. He got upset because he
didn't sign up for that. So now Django is upset
and he finally get through. You had to go to
the bathroom, and he had to go to the bathroom,
and he saw you go down the hall way and
you was going in there and he said, he said,
(09:10):
do you mind if I washed my face face sweat?
He wanted to get it off because that wasn't all
he was using. It was actually corn husker's lotion. He
made it hisself. What world I'm building a story, Jingle
(09:31):
field hand, He made his own corn husky's lotion. He
don't like driving in it, so he wanted to wash
it off his face. Okay, So then he let you
in the bathroom and he noticed you was uptight. He
told you to relax. You was tense. He told you
that when he was trying to give you that lap
dan As you didn't want. But he rubbed Django up
against you. And now all of a sudden, you're in
(09:55):
that bathroom with Jingo. He said, look, you need to relax.
You want me to help you to relax, And you said,
uh huh. First you said, I'm not up tank. He said,
but I could feel the tension in your shoulders. And
he put them big hands on your shoulders, the one
that had been picking.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Y'all. I didn't say nothing.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
I just said their hands that he had been picking,
he hit those are his picking hands. They was rough,
but they were soft because they knew how to handle it.
And next thing you was caught up in it. He
was rubbing your shoulders and all of a sudden, Django
started pressing down on your shoulders, and next thing you know,
(10:40):
you was in the floor. Django bagged up, scooted up
against the door. Now your head is in a bent position.
It's up against the bath tub. Jango stretched out and
you said in your letter right here, I'm not making
this up, you said in your letter right here. No, no,
(11:02):
I didn't know it would involve his tongue and other things.
He said, well, little girl, I don't want to tell
you something. It was no other things in there. It
was just django.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Tongue, okay, And that was all it was.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
But he was such an expert at it. You thought
it was some more things in there. It was just
had one thing.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Looker. You just had never seen it like that before.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
And Django was in there bouty and then it was
the best sexual experience of my life. On the bathroom floor.
He asked if we could keep in touch. I told
him I was married. He said he could see you
was married, but you could pay him to help you
unwine whenever I needed it. Here I am with my
(11:53):
little advertised husband, and I had to beck the big
strip of man's number in my phone. How bad would
it be if I cheated one more time?
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Girl?
Speaker 3 (12:04):
Django is like a bag of laized potato chips. Yeah yeah, girl,
you ain't gonna be able to lead just one that
damn Jango came up in there with all that field
hand experience.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
With that homemade corn huskers loach because that jangle.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
Jango don't need gas money. Jango need oat money. He
gotta feed the mule. Oh God, that brings him from
gig to give.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Uh. Django is a jigglo and a male escort.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
You're about to be involved in an old profession called prostitution.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Don't do it, little girl. You ain't strong enough, all right?
Speaker 3 (12:57):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Leave your comments on today's Stop Letter on Instagram at
Steve Barb at them and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast.
Coming up next, it is Junior and Sports Talk. Right
after this, you're listening to Harvey Morning Show