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January 15, 2020 15 mins

From candle smells, cheese and have you asked a question no one have ever asked?? 

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast?
Elvis represents show. Here we go, the fifteen minute morning
show podcast. All right, I gotta go, No, I do,
I have to I told you I have to leave.

(00:24):
But why did he even like you didn't do anything yet?
Because you know, just in case you have to roll
the credits at the end, I'll have my name on
here as being here. You said you give us two
to three minutes. I'll give you two to three minutes,
and I have to go. I wish I could stay,
but I have to go. What's scary? That's like the
guy from Dateline, who's the guy that talks like this
with the sinister voice. He comes in, he introduces each thing, saying,

(00:47):
and now we take you to Chicago where this happened.
He reads the headline. It's all he says, John John
Williams take it away, and that's great game. It's just
intros and outros. Keith Morrison, Keith Morrison. That's all he does,
or that's all he did on when when I saw
him on Dateline. In fact, L did his sketch on
him because of him doing the intros and natros and

(01:09):
just taking like twelve seconds and then of a minute
and a half. It's interesting if you ever watched Dateline
or one of those, it really truly is an hour
long show full of interviews and storylines, but the host
only spends maybe three minutes during the entire hour. It's
it's what a couchy job dream gig? I want that?

(01:31):
I want that gig. Wait, you have that gig sitting
around the table and you're fifty minute morning show podcast
is Gandhi and Scary and Brody and Garrett and Danielle
and straightening. You could go that was Mr Hanky, Yeah
it was. You could go counterclockwise. Next time, I will
want to be first. Yeah, I don't always have to

(01:52):
be last. I feel like then I have to say something, well,
you know what you did that I look left to right. Yes,
so if you're the last one. But usually they save
the star for last and starring straight name, thank you,
I appreciate it, and featuring straight n And that's how
you know the big actors and the movies they always
have the and in the role of straight Nate, straight Nate. Wait,

(02:13):
so that's that's actually um, I think there's actually some
some there's something through the guild or something that in
order to get the and you have to be pretty
important or with or something like that. So technically that
means the Morning Show is bigger than Elvis Durant. Yes, oh,
good point and the Morning Show. So technically, yes, right now,

(02:34):
if it was with the Morning Show, then the second
thing is not as important. Exactly what? What's scary? Nothing? What? No,
I'm good, I'm good, I'm good. Just say it. Well,
know what Prody just said? I you know, maybe maybe
like when a singer and they go with the rapper,
it's the singers song. Yeah, okay, gotcha? All right, So
this is I gotta go at least give us something

(02:57):
to talk about before you walk out. We've been on
for three minutes and we've said absolutely nothing. These are
the best podcasts. Danielle Well says, daniel what I've done?
Are you tired? My backhards, my neck, cards, my nick
my back crackat it's hey, this que a Paltrow candle thing.

(03:24):
I Actually we talked about that because you know, there's
some scientists at a lab that has to figure out
what vagina smells like. Right, No, this store, No, but
here's the story. She said that it was a joke.
That she was doing the scent with somebody with the
with the perfume guy, and she smelled and she's like, oh,

(03:44):
that smells like vagina. And it was a joke, and
then they came up with this scent, this beautiful scent
that supposedly is like a vagina. That's what she said, No,
because there's like, that's what my fiance does. She does flavorings,
and she's she's gone to school to figure out what
stuff smells like and tastes like, and there's chemicals that

(04:05):
make it do that. So how would you like the assignment? Like, Hey,
your job today figure out what a vagina smells like
and you have to combine Wwyneth Paltrow. So you have
to combine these different chemicals to make it smell like.
But let me ask a question. Do you have to
go and smell the vagina's first? Her vagina? I guess
I really wanted to leave three minutes ago. What is
Chris Martin smell like? I don't know. Well, off of that,

(04:28):
on Twitter, everyone was using what would your candle smell be?
My candle smell would be blank hashtag candle smell? I
like sandalwood. Oh that's a good one. Someone smells sandal
would they'll be like that snate, Yeah, I have sandal
wood the other right now, yeah, that's a very Indian scent.
Thank you, ye, no, thank you. I appreciate the promotion.
I would say green or red chili. That candle sounded

(04:53):
really intriguing. Fried chicken. No, but my brother sent me
a fried chicken log be burning your fireplace, and I
threw it away, Like what am I gonna do with that?
I don't. First of all, my fireplace in New York
is it's a it's gas, so I can't burn it
in that. So I've got this big chicken smelling logs
sitting there. I'm like, I don't need that. I Your
brother just sends you random She sends me the weirdest

(05:14):
of my brothers, out of his mind. Well, when we
first started talking about the vagina candle yesterday, I pulled
up all of the weird scented candles Yankee candle companies
come up with, and they had schnitzel and noodles. Who
wants to light of candles? You know? Well, you know
what white is it? White candle factory, white candle barn whatever.
Yankee candles like the biggest or something maybe Candle Barns

(05:35):
And yeah, they sell flavored spray for the bathroom, like
blueberry pie, and so I love those smells. But when
you spray in the bathroom, it's not like poopy blueberry Perry.
You know that there's only one. It's matches, you matchine,
it goes away insane. That sulfur makes it anything else.

(05:58):
But the problem is is like and someone lights the match,
and then you go on the bathroom, you go, you
do it here made light of match. I love match lighters.
Limited edition White Castle candle. Remember when White Castle did
those cases. It's going to be worth a lot of money.

(06:19):
I feel like white Castle smells kind of like vomit,
but it's delicious. It's so delicious. It's my favorite, my favorite.
To that point, I love stinky cheese. Stinky cheese. If
you sniff it, it smells god awful, but if you
eat it, it tastes great. So it's it's one of
those things. It's going to get through the smelly Castle

(06:40):
that said, it's seven minutes, and I was here for
half of the I've got to go. Wait, we're gonna
talk about head cheese. Where you going cheese is not cheese,
isn't it. No, head cheese is like this meat. It's
like a Deli meat. Oh it is, you know that right? Yeah?
I never know. It's made by all different types of
parts of the head translucid, and it has things floating

(07:01):
in it in like Gellow Forces the worst podcast ever?
Why would I sit here any longer? What does look like?
It's like it's a cube or and it's like either
a Cuban podcast ever. Oh it comes in the it
comes in a low format. Yeah, it's like kind It

(07:23):
has these globules of things. No, don't let it, are you? Okay,
hold on everyone, Danielle. I can't leave with you vomiting
like this? What the hell is that? Human? Like the
fingers and it's a clear gelatine and it has okay, okay, okay,

(07:43):
I'm gonna come clear. Jo, we come back to the
nasty candles? Yeah, thank you. I'm like a gasoline scented candle, candle,
how about a pool? I would feel weird lighting a
gas candle with a match. It is kind of contradictory.
It smells so good. So after I had my stroke,
my sense of smell and the second one, I had

(08:05):
my sense of smell and taste became much stronger, so
I could actually smell people before they walked in the room.
It was like superpower. It's crazy. That's pretty cool. Who
in here smells the worst right now? Probably Med? I
did a check because I think my deodor in his

(08:26):
time for me to switch over to the new ones.
Sandal Wood's not working. Sandal wood has run its course.
I gotta go to the bear Thorne or whatever old
spice has. Now that candle would burn out quickly. Gat
I thought you were going to say me, I was
ready for it. No, you've never smelled bad. Thanks. You
had that garlic thing going on, which was not your fault.
Was not jet onion jacket? Yeah, the onion Okay, so

(08:50):
update up TONI jacket? Is that the cleaners And they
told me they called me cleaners yesterday and they said,
I gotta be honest, we need to do this two
or three times now, and you gonna cost you triple
what you rub it all over your coat. They just said,
it's not coming out, so burn it. I know what
you should do tomorrow when we give away all of

(09:10):
the things to like charitable organization, bring that co How
much was that jacket that was Michael cores it was?
And how much have you pay to clean it? You
know what? That's a great point five times too. And
don't donate it to charity because then someone's going to
be stinking like onions out there their dry cleaning back,

(09:30):
like why does this smell? Like? What is this? You
imagine he probably stunt get the whole dry yea infected
all of those clothes. You guys give away your old
radio station, uh and gear like that. Because I tried
to do well. I've donated to charity several times. But
this is one jacket from Z one hundred from back
in the day that I'm like, I don't know if

(09:52):
I and I don't need it anymore, I should give
it to charity that green one yes, And I said
I should give it to charity, and then I walk
into the plate. Wouldn't do it because I'm like people
could walk around with a logo of thought the station.
I was like, should I take that? Because we got
these really nice peak coats one year and they have
a I would say it's like fifteen inches wide by

(10:12):
like five or six inches high. Of the Z one
hundred logo from the nineties. It's huge. It's like your
name on the back of a football jersey. And I
have two of them that I'll never wear and I
want to donate them because someone's cold. Right, But did
we walk around to see a hundred logo like they
worked here and they didn't work here. It's okay for
other people to walk around with it. I think it's
weird when we do it. I never wore I never

(10:33):
wore it. I mean, you're wearing a jacket, says your staff. Yeah.
But I went out yesterday. We all went out yesterday
and somebody that I was with showed up with a
code on that had their station logo across it, and
I was like, please cut this. I actually agree with you.
I think it's better when someone else wears it opposed
to us, because it's I just feel cheesy. When I

(10:57):
went like, hey, I asked me about the dal stage
and I worked for Does Michael Cores carry like a
Michael Core's wallet, but see, I'll pay to do it.
I do not like anything that has like the m
k's on it. Like the plain leather is nice, so
the shoes or whatever, but m k's all over the place.
My mom yells at me, no that I do like
the I just think it's weird when we wear our own,

(11:19):
our own stuff with my name. Last year we got
those really cool gray and black jackets with the hood,
which ones like they like like athlete jackets, And there
were sample ones to try on that didn't have the
logo yet, and I ear mocked the one in my size.
I'm like, I want that one, but someone took it,
so I have the It's an awesome jacket, looks good
on me, but I feel like I can't go shopping

(11:39):
or go anywhere with it because it's like it's like going, hey,
look where I work. It's like on the back of
Danielle's chair is the VI Nico and Vin's sweatshirt has
Danielle on it. You're gonna but that's my point is
you're never gonna wear it out. My wife wears it
all the time. She wears her around the house, if

(12:01):
she's running to the store. She didn't work here. She's
got on the front. And these two unknown people the
record label really wanted to push them. So isn't it
crazy to think daniel has an artist on her jacket,
but she's the most popular name on the jacket whatever,
I think it's in the car and you throw in

(12:22):
a song or on spot you know I heard, or
Spotify or on your Like, I have a USB player
in my car with hundreds of thousands of songs. Whatever?
Will you play a song that was a one hit
wonder fifteen twenty years ago? And you're like, I wonder
if they know somewhere in the world where they are
right now someone is enjoying their music, Like, wouldn't that
make them have some times? Yeah? I always think I
wonder if I'm the only one listening to this right now,

(12:44):
the only one I think you're never are ever, Like,
if you've ever typed anything into Google, whatever your thought
is gets auto completed. I don't think I've ever had
a thought that didn't get auto completed, And I'm like,
who the hell are these other weirdos? Can't we be friends? Yeah?
That comes up on Reddit all the time. Would are
you doing right now that no one else in the world,
the entire world is doing. My daughter used to go

(13:05):
on Spotify, and I don't know how you do it.
I'm sure it's away. She would search for the band
that had the least followers, like she'd find a band
with three people following them, then follow them and listen
to the music, and then contact them and say, I
just want to let you know I like your stuff,
and inevitably they would always write because no one else
was following them. Nice, so she became their fan and
they became her band. I always think about that whenever

(13:27):
I go to a restaurant that's packed. I'm like, man,
every single person here had the exact same thought to
do this tonight that I did. Damn it. Like I'm
not original at anything. I think. Yeah, I went to
the movies by myself and I went to the first
show of the day. It was eleven thirty to see
Star Wars. And I go in there in the theaters
like half full. I go, how are these people here?

(13:48):
It's Sunday, walk around an unchtime, walk around lunchtime during
the weekend, and scary and I have done this, and
where it's lunchtime and you're like, there's more people outside
not doing anything and it's not lunchtime just yet. That's
the mall too, because we get out early. So I go,
look something, I'll go to the mall before it gets crazy,

(14:08):
and I go. Don't these people work? That area in
Battery Park City, which is west and south of here,
which has these beautiful, lush parks and places to hang out.
And I'd be walking there in June on a on
a Wednesday afternoon around at twelve one o'clock in the afternoon,

(14:30):
and there are people like laying out stretched out taking
the sun with their towels, and I'm like, what do
these First of all, how can these people afford to
live in this neighborhood? And how can they do that
without working? Because they're obviously they married. Well there they
live in these buildings. Yeah, they married. Well that's pretty okay,

(14:52):
it's not quite over you. I enjoyed that. I felt
like fifteen minute morning show.
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