May 5, 2024 • 27 mins
Husband is adopted. Birth mom is cruel to him.
Wife having afair after 8 months of marriage.
What day is the Sabbath. We honnor the wrong day
Wife having afair after 8 months of marriage.
What day is the Sabbath. We honnor the wrong day
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
You're listening to KFI AM six fortyon demand. Christia. Welcome to the
Jesus Christia. Hi, Jesus.I have a question for you regarding my
husband. He's adopted. He's fortyfour years old, and when we had
children eleven years ago, I believehe used the excuse at that point to
try to contact his biological mother andfather. So for eleven years we've been
(00:25):
dealing with this. And you sayhe used the excuse, why because of
medical reasons or wanted to find outif there was Yeah, he used that
hole. My husband is a chiropractorand he always believed in lifestyle not genetics.
Okay, so when I had problemsduring my pregnancy, I believe he
used the excuse to contact the motherand father. And the father has had
(00:49):
absolutely nothing, nothing, wanted nothingto do with him. Okay, the
mother has had she's been very cruel, but he takes any kind of attention
as beat or good as he atleast gets to talk to him and these
half sisters. And this has beengoing on for eleven years, and he
(01:10):
has this longing to be close tothese people, and he's been in such
denial and he thinks that I'm jealous, jealous of these biologicals. And I'm
not jealous. I just see myhusband being treated so poorly and him still
doing everything he can to be incontact being treated poorly. Well, he
(01:37):
uh, he got cancer a yearand a half ago. And when he
called up and told them and askedthem, if since the bone marrow transplant,
you have your best chance with afull a full blood relative. Yes,
they said they would. Like everybodywe know, friends, friends and
family and myself, we all swappedtheir cheeks to see if we're or candidates.
(02:01):
They said there'd be a price topay, you know, it would
cost whatever, thirty thousand dollars.Excuse me, they wanted to charge him
to Yeah, yeah, if theywere a candidate. Oh, he's being
silly to be to have them inhis life. Well, he I told
(02:22):
your producer, he went so faras to go to California last year stand
outside his biological father's house for hours. Well, that's a that's an obsession.
That that that talking about the pastand how people yearn for the past
and somehow believe that it makes themwhole, when by no means does it.
(02:44):
It can explain certain things at best. That's What it does is give
a little bit of insight, butit should give you insight about yourself by
yourself. You shouldn't need to havethese people in your life in any way,
shape or form to feel whole,especially with his own imatate family that
he's created. Unfortunately, Tricia,the likelihood of you being able to explain
(03:06):
that to him and get him pastthat is going to be difficult. You
have to explain to him that heis ignoring his current family and that you
won't stand for that, and thathe has to that his obsession with them
is starting to decay and cause problemsin his own family. And I would
seriously recommend if you, guys arepart of a church, some pastoral counseling
(03:29):
or maybe find finding a Christian counselorof some kind to help you work through
that, because that can become verysignificant. Lee, Welcome to Jesus Christ
show Hi. Hi, Lee,how can I Jesus Hi? I'm calling
because I recently was exposed to thisthing called the Secret. Oh boy,
(03:52):
you're a little slow on the uptake. That's been around for a that I
actually I had also read this book, but it was talking about the power
of attraction of the rather the lawof attraction, and so I wanted to
get your opinion on this. Iwas wondering if, seeing as how the
(04:12):
Creator has created everything in such orderand everything that you know, such as
gravity and all these things that theyuse to try to explain this idea,
I just I would like to hearyour take. Well, in a nutshell.
In a nutshell, my first responsewould be, that's the first response.
(04:40):
Well, that's right. Here's thething. And this comes out probably
about every five to ten years.Someone kind of regurgitates the same garbage.
It's been going on forever. Imean, really, these types of books
continue to come out. In thesixties and seventies, they were popular with
psycho pictography, think and grow richthese types of books, and so someone
repackages them and they become the greatnew flavor. But really it's the same
(05:04):
old, same old, and thesecret's no different. The worst part of
it, now, you've had you'vehad chicken before, right, Okay?
Have you had chicken on the bone, like a breast of chicken on the
bone? Sure? Okay. Haveyou had a breast of chicken without the
bone? Sure? And you knowhow when you go into a breast of
chicken without the bone. You justcut away and you know that there's no
(05:26):
bone, and you eat it andyou enjoy on a breast of chicken with
the bone. You got to carvearound, you got to get things out,
pull that out until you get themeat and you know there's mostly bone
at that point. Now, couldyou imagine a breasted chicken that looked like
it was deboned, but there's actuallyfragments of bones throughout the entirety of it
that you don't know until you getin your mouth to start chewing and you
(05:46):
go, oh, my goodness,there's a bone. You start pulling it
out. What a mess, right, not the best way to eat?
Well, that's what a lot ofthis is there is. It's cloaked,
and there's some truth in it,and obviously all truth belongs to God,
so there's some truth in it,and there's some really some decent common sense
stuff in it, but it's soriddled with so much of this garbage,
(06:11):
either law of attraction, all thesethis garbage in there, that it ends
up being like that, like thatpiece of that breast of chicken with tiny
little bones in it. You haveto navigate so much through it to try
and keep from swallowing one of thesethings and hurting yourself. It's not worth
it it. Really, it justbecomes more of a chore to navigate around
(06:32):
it than it does to really beable to consume it. And it's more
of that happy garbage that's just tryingto get you to say that you can
do it yourself, and you can't. That's that's the beauty of Christian scriptures
is that it's not about you.Every other thing that they try and sell
you in life, it's about you. It's this egocentric garbage, and scripture
(06:59):
is different because it's it's not thatthe hero in scripture is not a human
by standard definition, So it's it'sreally about kind of taking your eye off
God and trying to get you focusedon this other garbage, and really it's
it's not worth the read. Harrison, Welcome to the Jesus Christ Show.
(07:24):
Hello Jesus. Hi, what's goingon? Harrison? Well, I wanted
to ask you how you felt aboutthis. I know that by she's having
an affair and I found this outby means of going to her phone and
reading text messages. Okay, andhow long did I have been together?
(07:47):
Oh? We've been married for eightmonths? Okay? And how long were
you together prior to being married.Let's see, about about eight months.
Also, you only knew each otherfor eight months prior to getting married,
and maybe let me do some taculationsfor about okay, for about a year
(08:09):
and a few months. Why wouldyou say eight months? Eight months is
when we started dating? Okay?Well we were friends first, Okay,
So how did you you've you feltyou knew her well enough to get married?
Absolutely turns out it turns out tobe different, right, right.
(08:33):
It was a radical change, andthis all just happened like in the last
couple of months, four months orso, three months. People don't tend
to change that way. People canmodify certain things or change little things in
their life, but a radical changefor the worst usually is not the case.
(08:54):
If there was probably signs was shedating someone when you met her?
No? Well, yeah, whenI met her, and so you found
texts she had she didn't tell you. Obviously you found out on your own,
right, did you confront her lateron? I did? When at
first thought I played like I didn'tknow, like I just wanted to ask
(09:16):
her, like you know, there'ssomething going on, Things like that,
but I knew better, and thenshe found out that I knew, and
then it kind of escalated. Soshe didn't trust me anymore. But like
the she didn't trust you anymore,right, well, she didn't trust me
in the capacity that well, likethat's it's what happened, is like the
(09:37):
shift of blame came towards me forbeing sneaky. Okay, that was the
bigger thing, of course, becauseshe you know, nobody wants to take
blame for anything. How long wasthe affair going on? It had been
going on. It was just anemotional affair at first, so it was
just a couple of weeks and thenalone. Okay, that's what ignited me
(10:03):
to I mean, I escalated itbecause I was just you know, really
MOPy, and she saw it.And she has two kids or my kids
I consider in mind. And stillshe had two kids from a previous relationship,
right, was it a marriage?No? Okay? And so now
(10:28):
you take on these children and youmarry her and within eight months she's having
an affair. And was there sexinvolved in her affair? Later on?
There was after she moved out,but it was like a separation really,
and it was mostly for the kids. I mean, that was the whole
purpose. She wanted them to goto a different school district and everything gotcha.
(10:50):
Okay, well hold tight, we'lltalk more just after this quick quick
break break. Harrison, thanks forhanging on. Now, you're married eight
months, two kids from a previousrelationship, your wife's you find out by
(11:15):
going what motivated you to go throughher phone and her text messages? You
had an inkling. I'm assuming priorthat maybe she was having an affair.
Right initially, like a couple ofweeks before that, I found out I
actually did go to her phone becauseof just change of behavior. How so,
(11:37):
what was the change of behavior younoticed? It was a sudden change
that she didn't really where. Shefound that my affection towards her had become
mechanical, almost like you know,if I would kiss her before I go
to work, she would find thatthat it's not genuine, but to me
(11:58):
it always was. But so thatkind of a llowed me to look at
that. She caught me look ather phone, and you know, that's
what got worse. But then whenI did that later on because of what
I had seen on a on asocial networking that kind because I knew who
that person was, somebody from herpast, and that's what I did that
(12:20):
the second time, and that's whenI found out, gotcha, and the
person from her past was an extlover, an ex boyfriend or boyfriend.
Okay, So it's somebody who's beenin her life. It's not the father
of her children. Correct? Correct? Okay? Is the father of the
children in the picture at all?No? And did she ever explain her
(12:46):
relationship with the father of the children. Did she date them him for a
long time? Obviously long enough tohave two children? I know all about
that, okay? And why didthey separate or break up? Abuse going
on? So she she has someissues with you with picking the right guy
(13:09):
or having And how did you guysmeet through church? Okay? And she's
she continues to go to church,not as often. And what made what
would you say made you guys click? It was just I don't know,
(13:31):
the respect that we had, thefun times, how we would laugh,
and we just we were just greatfriends. And I didn't know that she
liked me until she told me that, like way later. Did she reference
you as being someone very different fromguys that she had dated before? Yeah?
(13:52):
And uh, so you you askedher to marry you, you get
married, and was it a verybig wedding, not too big, but
it was very memorable. It wasimperfectly perfect. Gotcha, and she does
she is. She close with herher family and they were all there yes,
(14:13):
hm hmm. Okay, so she'shaving an affair now and you're going,
what should I do? The importantthing, always, Harrison, is
to look for a path of reconciliation. That's always what God is going to
want, is trying trying to findthat path of reconciliation. That doesn't mean
be a doormat, and you've gotto find you seem and I know you're
(14:35):
hurt, but you seem very meekand very timid. And my fear would
be in a situation like that thatin in a relationship, people want strength
and comfort and guidance and stability.I'm not sure why she went down the
(14:56):
path she did. There's something there, and it's very easy to blame it
on Facebook or some sort of socialnetwork. And believe me, they are
a huge problem. They build fantasy, and fantasy can never be lived up
to. And they built fantasies aboutold boyfriends, old girlfriends, past live
you know, I was younger,then I had this fun, then I
(15:20):
did whatever, and they opened adoor to that. But it's not just
about that, because opportunity doesn't meanthat somebody will follow through with it.
Just because the door to the jewelrystore is open doesn't mean someone will go
in and steal. That has tobe something withinside her. So something inside
her made it okay for her tohave this affair, at least initially emotionally.
(15:45):
And then finally, as you say, you separated, that means that
she she moved out of the house. You moved out of the house right
to the kids with her and thedog. Okay, Well, at least
she had enough sense to do that. And did you talk to her about
this relationship and ask her, youknow, what it was that she saw
in him, or what what youwere lacking, or any of those things?
(16:08):
Right, it was because he hadbroken it up and she never really
got over him or understood why thatthey've been able to go ahead and talk
about it. She shared some withme, but the way that she relates
that, she leaves out a lotof what's going on currently that I I'm
aware of, and the reason whyI don't say anything or I don't say
(16:30):
anything to her about that is becauseI don't want to bring up those negative
feelings or experiences, because I don'twant it to be about you know how,
I know how I got hold ofthat information. I just want her
to make a decision. And she'stold me she's gone out of her way
to let me know that she wantsto work it out that she does and
(16:52):
tend to, you know, continuewith our marriage, and okay, no,
that's fine, that's wonderful. Butat that point then you have to
come up with a plan to doso and how you guys are going to
do it and what that means.And it should probably mean a third party
somewhere helping you guys work through this, preferably the pastor at your church,
if you both go to the samechurch and work through it that way,
(17:17):
getting another perspective I think would bea positive thing for you guys to understand
and to work through it. Butyou have to start somewhere and you have
to build on that. I justfear that there is a lot that's unknown
because of the rapid nature of thecourtship and the marriage. You just need
(17:38):
to know somebody longer than eight monthsand unfortunately, Harrison there people tend to
look at the past and define themselvesa lot by the past. Paul said
it this way. Paul said,as when I was a child, I
spoke and acted like a child.As an adult, I speak and I
act as an adult. That washis way of saying, Listen, you
(18:00):
got to grow up and you gotto move on from things that happened in
your past. And I know it'svery popular in the world today to define
yourself from the past. Oh thishappened to me when I was younger,
this happened, or these are thethings that I experienced, and that should
help you propel you forward learning aboutwho you are and understanding, but it
(18:22):
shouldn't weigh you down. We're fondof saying on the show that if you
if you see life kind of theway you do a rearview mirror and all
the things that have happened to you, Like the rear view mirror in your
car. You use it to glanceat it every now and then to help
you change lanes, to move faster, or to move forward. But you'd
(18:44):
never drive looking in the rearview mirror. If you drove strictly looking in the
rear view mirror, you'd crash.You're guaranteed to crash. So there's something
going on with your wife where thepast is more appealing to her, more
exciting to her, and more interestingto her. There's something obviously back there.
And a lot of people get caughtup in the people that don't like
them or treat them poorly, oryou know, it didn't work out,
(19:08):
they left and never explained why.That tends to haunt people, but the
stronger person moves on. From thatstronger person says, well, there's obviously
something about me or them that didn'twork and moved on. It's better to
look at, you know, relationshipsas colors. People as colors, and
(19:30):
relationships is a combination of those colors, and see that there is no such
thing as a really truly ugly color. There's just ugly color combinations. There's
some things that you don't want toput together, and that relationships are very
much like that. You bring theindividual colors together and they sometimes don't mix,
but it has nothing to do withthe individual color itself. So people
(19:52):
get caught up and oh it hasto do with me, or I want
to hear what they have to say, and why did they leave? In
all this thing, and then itends up ruling and ruining their life,
and it just perpetuates because now you'rein that seat, sitting there going well,
why is she leaving me? Andthe question gets pushed on to another
person and then it can be nowthe next relationship will have it and all
(20:17):
this garbage. Ultimately you go toher and you say, this is the
deal. I'm willing to work thisout, but I'm willing to work it
out under these terms. You gotto cut ties with this guy completely.
No more ties with all of thesepeople. I don't want Facebook in the
house. I don't want any ofthat social networking garbage in the house.
It's going to be a doorway totemptation. It's not worth it. And
(20:38):
if you're not into that, Iget it. If it's more important than
this relationship, I get it.And that's when you tip your hat.
But if you don't have rules andguidelines, and if you're just wishy washy
and say well, all I dois want on on our back, and
all I want is her back inmy life and these things, then it's
not going to be anything again.It may calm down for a little bit,
(20:59):
but ultimately she'll keep stepping out becausethere's just no boundary structure or care.
Annie, Welcome to the Jesus ChristShow. Good morning. My question
is Genesis chapter six, and ittalks about the sons of God coming into
the daughters of men. And Iwas taught well told by another religious organization
(21:26):
that these were angels. The sonsof God were angels, and they were
having intercourse with human women. Yes, and then the Nephelin and all of
this, and the giants. Andthis is one of those verses Annie,
where you get a lot of discourseand a lot of different interpretation. I
(21:48):
will tell you this that there aredifferent theologians that land in different areas of
these verses and will point out allkinds of reasons for what they believe.
However, if you look at thecontext, is very it's legitimate to say
that the benea Lahim, or thesons of God in this sense is not
necessarily talking about angels. As amatter of fact, it is believed by
(22:11):
many scholars that they're talking about theline of Seth and the godly men and
the godly line of Seth, andthat the Daughters of Men is actually referring
to the line of Cain, sothat in context, it's not talking about
angels having sex with women. It'stalking about trying to protect the godly lines,
(22:36):
the blood lines that would lead tothe Messiah. And some will argue
that if you go through the context, you'll see that the verses actually point
this out prior and post to thosetroublesome verses. However, I will also
say that there's what's taught about angelsin any sort of specificity in scripture notes
(23:00):
that they can't they are not marriednor given in marriage, and it talks
about that they have no reproductive organs, so you wouldn't have an angel do
that. There are those that wouldcome at that point Annie and they'd say,
well, then there was a possessionof sorts that took place. But
in context, really it's easier tocome to the conclusion without you know,
(23:22):
getting overly mystical that it was aboutthe two different lines, the Sethite line
and the ungodly Canite line. Sothe paths there are really kind of drawn
that way. It's a lot sexierand interesting. I suppose to consider it
that it was angels and the like, but really that's more falls into a
(23:48):
more mystical type arena and doesn't necessarilysuit the context. Anthony, Welcome to
the Jesus Christ Show. Hey,hello, Howry, good morning, Hi
Anthony. How can I help you? Well? According to the Ten Commandments,
we were supposed to honor a Sabbathday. Correct, correct, But
(24:10):
everybody in the Christian churches of day, ninety nine percent of them honored that
on a Sunday. Sunday is notthe Sabbath day because it is the first
day of the week, whereas theseventh day to week, which is a
Saturday, is the seventh day toweek. How come we aren't worshiping the
Sabbath on Saturday instead of Sunday likewe should. Here's the confusion. Christians
do not worship on the Sabbath.They are worshiping on the Lord's Day,
(24:34):
which is Sunday. And this takesplace in early Christians. Can you can
see this. Early Christianity did notworship or observe on Sunday or on Saturday
or on the Sabbath, and didnot even rest on the Sabbath. After
the Resurrection. What happened was theit shifted from worshiping on Saturday. The
(24:59):
actual Sabbath to worshiping and resting onthe Lord's Day, which is Sunday.
This has to do with the resurrection, so it's the Resurrection day. Now.
You can see this in scriptures thatNew Testament Christians did not believe Saturday
should be observed by worshiping rest Romansfourteen five and six, Galatians four eight
through eleven, Colossians two, sixteenand seventeen. So there are some Christians
(25:25):
that regard the Sabbath as part ofthe ceremonial law of Israel and thus not
applicable to the Church. But evenif you did, it's about the Sabbath
being a day of rest and notabout a particular day in particular. So
if you remember, I was askedabout the Sabbath, and I replied that
(25:48):
the Sabbath was made for man,not man for the Sabbath, so that
the law doesn't supersede. The importantthing was that man takes the time to
rest and to worship. That's whatwas important. That's what was above all
things. So what seems like Christiansare worshiping on the wrong day because it's
not the Sabbath, is actually Christiansworshiping on the Lord's Day, not the
(26:11):
Sabbath. So two different parts there. You're absolutely right, the Sabbath is
on Saturday, not on Sunday.Christians kind of say call it the Sabbath
sometimes, but they're misspeaking. Sundayis not the Sabbath. That didn't change.
What did change was the Lord's Daycame into effect after the Resurrection and
Christians started celebrating on different days sometimesit's even in scripture you can find it
(26:37):
during the middle of the week,not on Saturday or Sunday. So that's
where that comes from, and that'swhere that is, and I hope that
clears that up. And remember,more importantly than all of this, I'm
with you always, KF I amsixty on demand.
You're listening to KFI AM six fortyon demand. Christia. Welcome to the
Jesus Christia. Hi, Jesus.I have a question for you regarding my
husband. He's adopted. He's fortyfour years old, and when we had
children eleven years ago, I believehe used the excuse at that point to
try to contact his biological mother andfather. So for eleven years we've been
(00:25):
dealing with this. And you sayhe used the excuse, why because of
medical reasons or wanted to find outif there was Yeah, he used that
hole. My husband is a chiropractorand he always believed in lifestyle not genetics.
Okay, so when I had problemsduring my pregnancy, I believe he
used the excuse to contact the motherand father. And the father has had
(00:49):
absolutely nothing, nothing, wanted nothingto do with him. Okay, the
mother has had she's been very cruel, but he takes any kind of attention
as beat or good as he atleast gets to talk to him and these
half sisters. And this has beengoing on for eleven years, and he
(01:10):
has this longing to be close tothese people, and he's been in such
denial and he thinks that I'm jealous, jealous of these biologicals. And I'm
not jealous. I just see myhusband being treated so poorly and him still
doing everything he can to be incontact being treated poorly. Well, he
(01:37):
uh, he got cancer a yearand a half ago. And when he
called up and told them and askedthem, if since the bone marrow transplant,
you have your best chance with afull a full blood relative. Yes,
they said they would. Like everybodywe know, friends, friends and
family and myself, we all swappedtheir cheeks to see if we're or candidates.
(02:01):
They said there'd be a price topay, you know, it would
cost whatever, thirty thousand dollars.Excuse me, they wanted to charge him
to Yeah, yeah, if theywere a candidate. Oh, he's being
silly to be to have them inhis life. Well, he I told
(02:22):
your producer, he went so faras to go to California last year stand
outside his biological father's house for hours. Well, that's a that's an obsession.
That that that talking about the pastand how people yearn for the past
and somehow believe that it makes themwhole, when by no means does it.
(02:44):
It can explain certain things at best. That's What it does is give
a little bit of insight, butit should give you insight about yourself by
yourself. You shouldn't need to havethese people in your life in any way,
shape or form to feel whole,especially with his own imatate family that
he's created. Unfortunately, Tricia,the likelihood of you being able to explain
(03:06):
that to him and get him pastthat is going to be difficult. You
have to explain to him that heis ignoring his current family and that you
won't stand for that, and thathe has to that his obsession with them
is starting to decay and cause problemsin his own family. And I would
seriously recommend if you, guys arepart of a church, some pastoral counseling
(03:29):
or maybe find finding a Christian counselorof some kind to help you work through
that, because that can become verysignificant. Lee, Welcome to Jesus Christ
show Hi. Hi, Lee,how can I Jesus Hi? I'm calling
because I recently was exposed to thisthing called the Secret. Oh boy,
(03:52):
you're a little slow on the uptake. That's been around for a that I
actually I had also read this book, but it was talking about the power
of attraction of the rather the lawof attraction, and so I wanted to
get your opinion on this. Iwas wondering if, seeing as how the
(04:12):
Creator has created everything in such orderand everything that you know, such as
gravity and all these things that theyuse to try to explain this idea,
I just I would like to hearyour take. Well, in a nutshell.
In a nutshell, my first responsewould be, that's the first response.
(04:40):
Well, that's right. Here's thething. And this comes out probably
about every five to ten years.Someone kind of regurgitates the same garbage.
It's been going on forever. Imean, really, these types of books
continue to come out. In thesixties and seventies, they were popular with
psycho pictography, think and grow richthese types of books, and so someone
repackages them and they become the greatnew flavor. But really it's the same
(05:04):
old, same old, and thesecret's no different. The worst part of
it, now, you've had you'vehad chicken before, right, Okay?
Have you had chicken on the bone, like a breast of chicken on the
bone? Sure? Okay. Haveyou had a breast of chicken without the
bone? Sure? And you knowhow when you go into a breast of
chicken without the bone. You justcut away and you know that there's no
(05:26):
bone, and you eat it andyou enjoy on a breast of chicken with
the bone. You got to carvearound, you got to get things out,
pull that out until you get themeat and you know there's mostly bone
at that point. Now, couldyou imagine a breasted chicken that looked like
it was deboned, but there's actuallyfragments of bones throughout the entirety of it
that you don't know until you getin your mouth to start chewing and you
(05:46):
go, oh, my goodness,there's a bone. You start pulling it
out. What a mess, right, not the best way to eat?
Well, that's what a lot ofthis is there is. It's cloaked,
and there's some truth in it,and obviously all truth belongs to God,
so there's some truth in it,and there's some really some decent common sense
stuff in it, but it's soriddled with so much of this garbage,
(06:11):
either law of attraction, all thesethis garbage in there, that it ends
up being like that, like thatpiece of that breast of chicken with tiny
little bones in it. You haveto navigate so much through it to try
and keep from swallowing one of thesethings and hurting yourself. It's not worth
it it. Really, it justbecomes more of a chore to navigate around
(06:32):
it than it does to really beable to consume it. And it's more
of that happy garbage that's just tryingto get you to say that you can
do it yourself, and you can't. That's that's the beauty of Christian scriptures
is that it's not about you.Every other thing that they try and sell
you in life, it's about you. It's this egocentric garbage, and scripture
(06:59):
is different because it's it's not thatthe hero in scripture is not a human
by standard definition, So it's it'sreally about kind of taking your eye off
God and trying to get you focusedon this other garbage, and really it's
it's not worth the read. Harrison, Welcome to the Jesus Christ Show.
(07:24):
Hello Jesus. Hi, what's goingon? Harrison? Well, I wanted
to ask you how you felt aboutthis. I know that by she's having
an affair and I found this outby means of going to her phone and
reading text messages. Okay, andhow long did I have been together?
(07:47):
Oh? We've been married for eightmonths? Okay? And how long were
you together prior to being married.Let's see, about about eight months.
Also, you only knew each otherfor eight months prior to getting married,
and maybe let me do some taculationsfor about okay, for about a year
(08:09):
and a few months. Why wouldyou say eight months? Eight months is
when we started dating? Okay?Well we were friends first, Okay,
So how did you you've you feltyou knew her well enough to get married?
Absolutely turns out it turns out tobe different, right, right.
(08:33):
It was a radical change, andthis all just happened like in the last
couple of months, four months orso, three months. People don't tend
to change that way. People canmodify certain things or change little things in
their life, but a radical changefor the worst usually is not the case.
(08:54):
If there was probably signs was shedating someone when you met her?
No? Well, yeah, whenI met her, and so you found
texts she had she didn't tell you. Obviously you found out on your own,
right, did you confront her lateron? I did? When at
first thought I played like I didn'tknow, like I just wanted to ask
(09:16):
her, like you know, there'ssomething going on, Things like that,
but I knew better, and thenshe found out that I knew, and
then it kind of escalated. Soshe didn't trust me anymore. But like
the she didn't trust you anymore,right, well, she didn't trust me
in the capacity that well, likethat's it's what happened, is like the
(09:37):
shift of blame came towards me forbeing sneaky. Okay, that was the
bigger thing, of course, becauseshe you know, nobody wants to take
blame for anything. How long wasthe affair going on? It had been
going on. It was just anemotional affair at first, so it was
just a couple of weeks and thenalone. Okay, that's what ignited me
(10:03):
to I mean, I escalated itbecause I was just you know, really
MOPy, and she saw it.And she has two kids or my kids
I consider in mind. And stillshe had two kids from a previous relationship,
right, was it a marriage?No? Okay? And so now
(10:28):
you take on these children and youmarry her and within eight months she's having
an affair. And was there sexinvolved in her affair? Later on?
There was after she moved out,but it was like a separation really,
and it was mostly for the kids. I mean, that was the whole
purpose. She wanted them to goto a different school district and everything gotcha.
(10:50):
Okay, well hold tight, we'lltalk more just after this quick quick
break break. Harrison, thanks forhanging on. Now, you're married eight
months, two kids from a previousrelationship, your wife's you find out by
(11:15):
going what motivated you to go throughher phone and her text messages? You
had an inkling. I'm assuming priorthat maybe she was having an affair.
Right initially, like a couple ofweeks before that, I found out I
actually did go to her phone becauseof just change of behavior. How so,
(11:37):
what was the change of behavior younoticed? It was a sudden change
that she didn't really where. Shefound that my affection towards her had become
mechanical, almost like you know,if I would kiss her before I go
to work, she would find thatthat it's not genuine, but to me
(11:58):
it always was. But so thatkind of a llowed me to look at
that. She caught me look ather phone, and you know, that's
what got worse. But then whenI did that later on because of what
I had seen on a on asocial networking that kind because I knew who
that person was, somebody from herpast, and that's what I did that
(12:20):
the second time, and that's whenI found out, gotcha, and the
person from her past was an extlover, an ex boyfriend or boyfriend.
Okay, So it's somebody who's beenin her life. It's not the father
of her children. Correct? Correct? Okay? Is the father of the
children in the picture at all?No? And did she ever explain her
(12:46):
relationship with the father of the children. Did she date them him for a
long time? Obviously long enough tohave two children? I know all about
that, okay? And why didthey separate or break up? Abuse going
on? So she she has someissues with you with picking the right guy
(13:09):
or having And how did you guysmeet through church? Okay? And she's
she continues to go to church,not as often. And what made what
would you say made you guys click? It was just I don't know,
(13:31):
the respect that we had, thefun times, how we would laugh,
and we just we were just greatfriends. And I didn't know that she
liked me until she told me that, like way later. Did she reference
you as being someone very different fromguys that she had dated before? Yeah?
(13:52):
And uh, so you you askedher to marry you, you get
married, and was it a verybig wedding, not too big, but
it was very memorable. It wasimperfectly perfect. Gotcha, and she does
she is. She close with herher family and they were all there yes,
(14:13):
hm hmm. Okay, so she'shaving an affair now and you're going,
what should I do? The importantthing, always, Harrison, is
to look for a path of reconciliation. That's always what God is going to
want, is trying trying to findthat path of reconciliation. That doesn't mean
be a doormat, and you've gotto find you seem and I know you're
(14:35):
hurt, but you seem very meekand very timid. And my fear would
be in a situation like that thatin in a relationship, people want strength
and comfort and guidance and stability.I'm not sure why she went down the
(14:56):
path she did. There's something there, and it's very easy to blame it
on Facebook or some sort of socialnetwork. And believe me, they are
a huge problem. They build fantasy, and fantasy can never be lived up
to. And they built fantasies aboutold boyfriends, old girlfriends, past live
you know, I was younger,then I had this fun, then I
(15:20):
did whatever, and they opened adoor to that. But it's not just
about that, because opportunity doesn't meanthat somebody will follow through with it.
Just because the door to the jewelrystore is open doesn't mean someone will go
in and steal. That has tobe something withinside her. So something inside
her made it okay for her tohave this affair, at least initially emotionally.
(15:45):
And then finally, as you say, you separated, that means that
she she moved out of the house. You moved out of the house right
to the kids with her and thedog. Okay, Well, at least
she had enough sense to do that. And did you talk to her about
this relationship and ask her, youknow, what it was that she saw
in him, or what what youwere lacking, or any of those things?
(16:08):
Right, it was because he hadbroken it up and she never really
got over him or understood why thatthey've been able to go ahead and talk
about it. She shared some withme, but the way that she relates
that, she leaves out a lotof what's going on currently that I I'm
aware of, and the reason whyI don't say anything or I don't say
(16:30):
anything to her about that is becauseI don't want to bring up those negative
feelings or experiences, because I don'twant it to be about you know how,
I know how I got hold ofthat information. I just want her
to make a decision. And she'stold me she's gone out of her way
to let me know that she wantsto work it out that she does and
(16:52):
tend to, you know, continuewith our marriage, and okay, no,
that's fine, that's wonderful. Butat that point then you have to
come up with a plan to doso and how you guys are going to
do it and what that means.And it should probably mean a third party
somewhere helping you guys work through this, preferably the pastor at your church,
if you both go to the samechurch and work through it that way,
(17:17):
getting another perspective I think would bea positive thing for you guys to understand
and to work through it. Butyou have to start somewhere and you have
to build on that. I justfear that there is a lot that's unknown
because of the rapid nature of thecourtship and the marriage. You just need
(17:38):
to know somebody longer than eight monthsand unfortunately, Harrison there people tend to
look at the past and define themselvesa lot by the past. Paul said
it this way. Paul said,as when I was a child, I
spoke and acted like a child.As an adult, I speak and I
act as an adult. That washis way of saying, Listen, you
(18:00):
got to grow up and you gotto move on from things that happened in
your past. And I know it'svery popular in the world today to define
yourself from the past. Oh thishappened to me when I was younger,
this happened, or these are thethings that I experienced, and that should
help you propel you forward learning aboutwho you are and understanding, but it
(18:22):
shouldn't weigh you down. We're fondof saying on the show that if you
if you see life kind of theway you do a rearview mirror and all
the things that have happened to you, Like the rear view mirror in your
car. You use it to glanceat it every now and then to help
you change lanes, to move faster, or to move forward. But you'd
(18:44):
never drive looking in the rearview mirror. If you drove strictly looking in the
rear view mirror, you'd crash.You're guaranteed to crash. So there's something
going on with your wife where thepast is more appealing to her, more
exciting to her, and more interestingto her. There's something obviously back there.
And a lot of people get caughtup in the people that don't like
them or treat them poorly, oryou know, it didn't work out,
(19:08):
they left and never explained why.That tends to haunt people, but the
stronger person moves on. From thatstronger person says, well, there's obviously
something about me or them that didn'twork and moved on. It's better to
look at, you know, relationshipsas colors. People as colors, and
(19:30):
relationships is a combination of those colors, and see that there is no such
thing as a really truly ugly color. There's just ugly color combinations. There's
some things that you don't want toput together, and that relationships are very
much like that. You bring theindividual colors together and they sometimes don't mix,
but it has nothing to do withthe individual color itself. So people
(19:52):
get caught up and oh it hasto do with me, or I want
to hear what they have to say, and why did they leave? In
all this thing, and then itends up ruling and ruining their life,
and it just perpetuates because now you'rein that seat, sitting there going well,
why is she leaving me? Andthe question gets pushed on to another
person and then it can be nowthe next relationship will have it and all
(20:17):
this garbage. Ultimately you go toher and you say, this is the
deal. I'm willing to work thisout, but I'm willing to work it
out under these terms. You gotto cut ties with this guy completely.
No more ties with all of thesepeople. I don't want Facebook in the
house. I don't want any ofthat social networking garbage in the house.
It's going to be a doorway totemptation. It's not worth it. And
(20:38):
if you're not into that, Iget it. If it's more important than
this relationship, I get it.And that's when you tip your hat.
But if you don't have rules andguidelines, and if you're just wishy washy
and say well, all I dois want on on our back, and
all I want is her back inmy life and these things, then it's
not going to be anything again.It may calm down for a little bit,
(20:59):
but ultimately she'll keep stepping out becausethere's just no boundary structure or care.
Annie, Welcome to the Jesus ChristShow. Good morning. My question
is Genesis chapter six, and ittalks about the sons of God coming into
the daughters of men. And Iwas taught well told by another religious organization
(21:26):
that these were angels. The sonsof God were angels, and they were
having intercourse with human women. Yes, and then the Nephelin and all of
this, and the giants. Andthis is one of those verses Annie,
where you get a lot of discourseand a lot of different interpretation. I
(21:48):
will tell you this that there aredifferent theologians that land in different areas of
these verses and will point out allkinds of reasons for what they believe.
However, if you look at thecontext, is very it's legitimate to say
that the benea Lahim, or thesons of God in this sense is not
necessarily talking about angels. As amatter of fact, it is believed by
(22:11):
many scholars that they're talking about theline of Seth and the godly men and
the godly line of Seth, andthat the Daughters of Men is actually referring
to the line of Cain, sothat in context, it's not talking about
angels having sex with women. It'stalking about trying to protect the godly lines,
(22:36):
the blood lines that would lead tothe Messiah. And some will argue
that if you go through the context, you'll see that the verses actually point
this out prior and post to thosetroublesome verses. However, I will also
say that there's what's taught about angelsin any sort of specificity in scripture notes
(23:00):
that they can't they are not marriednor given in marriage, and it talks
about that they have no reproductive organs, so you wouldn't have an angel do
that. There are those that wouldcome at that point Annie and they'd say,
well, then there was a possessionof sorts that took place. But
in context, really it's easier tocome to the conclusion without you know,
(23:22):
getting overly mystical that it was aboutthe two different lines, the Sethite line
and the ungodly Canite line. Sothe paths there are really kind of drawn
that way. It's a lot sexierand interesting. I suppose to consider it
that it was angels and the like, but really that's more falls into a
(23:48):
more mystical type arena and doesn't necessarilysuit the context. Anthony, Welcome to
the Jesus Christ Show. Hey,hello, Howry, good morning, Hi
Anthony. How can I help you? Well? According to the Ten Commandments,
we were supposed to honor a Sabbathday. Correct, correct, But
(24:10):
everybody in the Christian churches of day, ninety nine percent of them honored that
on a Sunday. Sunday is notthe Sabbath day because it is the first
day of the week, whereas theseventh day to week, which is a
Saturday, is the seventh day toweek. How come we aren't worshiping the
Sabbath on Saturday instead of Sunday likewe should. Here's the confusion. Christians
do not worship on the Sabbath.They are worshiping on the Lord's Day,
(24:34):
which is Sunday. And this takesplace in early Christians. Can you can
see this. Early Christianity did notworship or observe on Sunday or on Saturday
or on the Sabbath, and didnot even rest on the Sabbath. After
the Resurrection. What happened was theit shifted from worshiping on Saturday. The
(24:59):
actual Sabbath to worshiping and resting onthe Lord's Day, which is Sunday.
This has to do with the resurrection, so it's the Resurrection day. Now.
You can see this in scriptures thatNew Testament Christians did not believe Saturday
should be observed by worshiping rest Romansfourteen five and six, Galatians four eight
through eleven, Colossians two, sixteenand seventeen. So there are some Christians
(25:25):
that regard the Sabbath as part ofthe ceremonial law of Israel and thus not
applicable to the Church. But evenif you did, it's about the Sabbath
being a day of rest and notabout a particular day in particular. So
if you remember, I was askedabout the Sabbath, and I replied that
(25:48):
the Sabbath was made for man,not man for the Sabbath, so that
the law doesn't supersede. The importantthing was that man takes the time to
rest and to worship. That's whatwas important. That's what was above all
things. So what seems like Christiansare worshiping on the wrong day because it's
not the Sabbath, is actually Christiansworshiping on the Lord's Day, not the
(26:11):
Sabbath. So two different parts there. You're absolutely right, the Sabbath is
on Saturday, not on Sunday.Christians kind of say call it the Sabbath
sometimes, but they're misspeaking. Sundayis not the Sabbath. That didn't change.
What did change was the Lord's Daycame into effect after the Resurrection and
Christians started celebrating on different days sometimesit's even in scripture you can find it
(26:37):
during the middle of the week,not on Saturday or Sunday. So that's
where that comes from, and that'swhere that is, and I hope that
clears that up. And remember,more importantly than all of this, I'm
with you always, KF I amsixty on demand.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Football’s funniest family duo — Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles and Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs — team up to provide next-level access to life in the league as it unfolds. The two brothers and Super Bowl champions drop weekly insights about the weekly slate of games and share their INSIDE perspectives on trending NFL news and sports headlines. They also endlessly rag on each other as brothers do, chat the latest in pop culture and welcome some very popular and well-known friends to chat with them. Check out new episodes every Wednesday. Follow New Heights on the Wondery App, YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free, and get exclusive content on Wondery+. Join Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And join our new membership for a unique fan experience by going to the New Heights YouTube channel now!