Hangover Medicine

Subscribe directly to the Fifth Hour podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-fifth-hour-with-ben-maller/id1478163837. Recovering from a lengthy 4th of July party, Ben and David take some aspirin before addressing listener emails and requests after the holiday. Still plenty of inquiries and thoughts with a national shutdown so the guys continue to answer the pressing matters.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Get right to the romance and find the way to
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treats and more. Surprise your Valentine with one eight hundred
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(00:43):
crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich
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if you haven't done it yet, and we've gotten a

(01:25):
lot of good reviews guests got on the podcast, but
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But we do thank those that have done it. And
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to do it, so go ahead and put a post

(01:46):
up there. Yeah, absolutely, hello, I was I was waiting
for the proper introduction. I'm sorry. Oh you are such
you are such an you are such an asshole. All right,
So now for better or worse west of the four
oh five, mister elitist Scottsdale gascon right over there. It's

(02:18):
an appropriate way to start out a new week, uh,
mister eight oh six in a fico score that more.
That applause was for you, and how you dazzled the
night away with the United States, with the NFL and
a new national anthem being plays that monologue the other night,
said Mallard, Holy shit, it's amazing because I know certain

(02:42):
times when you're asleep at like eight or nine or
ten o'clock in the morning, I'll click on a story
that comes out and it's like monologue one, monologue two,
monologue three, and it's like Taylor made on certain days
for certain shows with you. That's the NFL continues to
be the yea that keeps on giving. Ben said, yeah, Well,

(03:02):
I've always had a pet peeve of mine people that pander.
I just don't think that the society is not better
for people pandering. But the NFL's fully on the pander
train church. They're going down the tracks. And as I
said in the monologue the other day, I mean, you
know it's that slippery slope, right, it's Pandora's box. Well,

(03:24):
now you have announced that you fully are invested in this.
You're gonna play the Black National Anthem, which I didn't
even really know was a thing I did. Did you
know that I did not? I guess I'm might educated
on that. But now you've positioned yourself. Well, what if
there is a story involving a Mexican American or an
Asian American, or a go down any American samoan American?

(03:49):
That's right. Do you then and they have a song
that's important to them? Yeah? Do you then if you
don't play it, you're insensitive? Yes. Um. And the line
that I'm the most out of in that monologue is
it they're gonna turn NFL games into a concert. It's
gonna be like a going to see the Boston Pops
or something like that, where let's see what songs are

(04:13):
gonna be playing before maybe we'll get the game and
we're gonna shorten the game from four quarters to one quarter.
It's just a wild story, you know. And Giscan I
would like to just talk about sports stories, but there
haven't been sports in one hundred and seventeen or eighteen
days or whatever it is now. So we deal with
what we have. We make, as Bill Parcels would say,

(04:33):
chicken salad, chicken shit. Yeah. And then you know, when
you have bananas that go bad, you make banana bread. Yeah,
we'll see, And so that's how that works. But see,
here's the amazing thing, though, is that you just mentioned
with the national anthem being played, that's on the horizon.
You also have NASCAR and one driver that has a
Trump car and that's right, all people offended by that, Yes,

(04:55):
it's all the people offended by the BLM car that
has been driven around. Yes. And then you also have
on deck the NBA with their social justice issues on
the backs of their jerseys. It's never any use. I'm
so glad we had Leo Terrell on the other day.
We might have to have Leo as on a retainer. Yes,
we might have to bring Leo back carefully, he's an attorney.

(05:18):
You don't want to use the word. Yeah, you don't
want to use that word for sure, because that is dangerous.
But I just I didn't think I mentioned this on
the radio show there to night, but that NASCAR thing
they're they're woke, woke activity did not exactly resonate with
the NASCAR fan And I don't know if you saw
the ratings were horrific for the NASCAR race after Bubba

(05:42):
Wallace and all that attention. You know that the belief
and I've always kind of bought into this over the
year's guest gone that any publicity is good publicity. Right,
That's that's something that I've I've been a big believer
and well apparently not because the NASCAR race. You'd think
with all this attention and all the buzz about Bubba
Wallace and he said it was a news and of

(06:05):
course it was just a it was applephoenia is the
term that would apply there. It's it's a human condition.
I actually told you about that. I think we talked
on the phonus that's applephenia. Yeah, that was that is
to close out the month of June, which was even
more alarming because don't forget FS one had the entire broadcast.
It was a triple header. They did the Truck Series

(06:25):
in the morning, than the Exfinity race, and then the
NASCAR Cup Series to close out the day. So that's
a little alarming, especially on the aftermath of everything that
went down earlier with Yeah, you would think more people
would be tuning in to see what it would happen
and did not did not take place. Be sure to
catch live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at
two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on Fox Sports Radio

(06:48):
and the iHeartRadio wapp Get right to the romance and
find the way to wow this Valentine's with one hundred
Flowers dot com. From classic roses and Bouquet's to decadent
chocolate covered berries, gourmet treats and more. Surprise your Valentine
with one eight hundred flowers dot com right now. Get
the eighteen stem enchanted rose medley for thirty nine ninety

(07:10):
nine or upgrade to twenty four red roses for ten
dollars more. Go to one hundred flowers dot com slash
tune in. That's one eight hundred flowers dot com. Slash
tune in. What grows in the forest trees? Sure no
one else grows in the forest. Our imagination, our sense
of wonder, and our family bonds grow too, because when

(07:31):
we disconnect from this and connect with this, we reconnect
with each other. The forest is closer than you think.
Find a forest near you and start exploring. I Discover
the Forest dot Org, brought to you by the United
States Forest Service and the AD Council. And we're live

(07:52):
here outside the Perez family home, just waiting for them,
and there they go, almost on time. This morning, Mom
is coming out the front door strong with a double
armed kid carry looks like Dad has the bags, daughter
is bringing up the rear. Oh but the diaper bag
wasn't closed. Diapers and toys are everywhere. Ooh, but mom

(08:13):
has just nailed the perfect car seat buckle for the toddler.
And now the eldest daughter, who looks to be about
nine or ten, has secured herself in the booster seat.
Dad zips the bag closed and they're off. But looks
like Mom doesn't realize her coffee cup is still on
the roof of the car, and there it goes. Ah,
that's a shame. That mug was a fam favorite. Don't

(08:36):
sweat the small stuff, just nail the big stuff, like
making sure your kids are buckle correctly in the right
seat for their agent's eyes. Learn more at NHTSA dot
gov slash the Right Seat visits NHTSA dot gov slash
the Right Seat. Brought to you by NITZA and the
ad Council. All right, so on this edition of the
Fifth Hour, we've got odd stuff I found surfing the web,

(08:58):
a few don't stick to sports stories the week, and
a bunch of mail listener questions. Will open up the
mail bag for your quizzes, and we'll get right into it.
This is some awesome I like these oddball stories. And
when I used to work with Looney Tunes, we would
try to one up each other. It would be a
pissing contest to see who could find the most ridiculous
odd fact about life. In fact, we turned the blitz

(09:20):
when it was baseball season. We would just try to
entertain ourselves by throwing fun facts out. Like when we
do that, we go to Arlington, Texas, which is just
a few miles away from where Whiteout was invented, and
you know the Rangers, they're playing the Angels or whatever,
and we do these fun facts. Were going out of
Fenway Park and just down the road the chocolate chip

(09:43):
cookie was invented at the Toll House restaurant and hotel
and anyway. So that as the backdrop, here we go,
this is interesting. I thought this was kind of cool
in the nineteen eighties. So back in the nineteen eighties,
went back a long time. There there was this unexplained
noise that was coming out from under the ocean, and
there's a lot of tension between Sweden and Russia because

(10:07):
Sweden and Russia they were accused of sending Sweden had
accused Russia of sending submarines into Swedish waters. Do you
know the rest of the story, as Paul Harvey would say,
I do not. This is great. So they investigated. What
do you think the sound was? Um? I think the
sound was whales. I think the whales were humping. No,

(10:28):
it was actually the sound of herring's farting in the water. Oh,
that we had an international conflict between Sweden and Russia
because of flatulence by fish. It's what we didn't That great?
That's pretty good. I did not know about that. I
thought that was that was pretty interesting. A lot of
people concerned about who's gonna win. Is it gonna be
sleepy Joe Biden or Donald Trump? Who's gonna win the

(10:51):
election here in twenty twenty, Well, good news, guest gown.
We will know by October thirty. First, we are going
to know who's gonna win the election. We don't have
to wait till early in November, which is just a
few days after that. Why is that Since nineteen ninety six,
a company named Spirit Halloween has accurately predicted who is

(11:13):
going to become the president of United States based on
which candidate sells more mask So if you want Joe
Biden to be your president by a Joe Biden mask,
if you want Trump to be your president by a
Trump mask, that's good for us since we're just a
couple hours away from Vegas. Looking get the totals and
then yeah, run in bed. Yeah that's right. Yeah, all right.

(11:33):
Now this is another one. We have a lot of
blind listeners. This is actually positive thing if you were
born blind. This is the first positive thing I can
recall in many years. If you're born blind, that's very
tough life when you're born blind. It's the obstacles and
it's it's really impressive when somebody can overcome those odds.
We have a lot of people that listen to the
show that have done that. We have inca Terror who

(11:54):
is a classically trained musician who's performed all over the
world and he's blind blind Scott. I don't know that
i'd put him in the good category, but he's there.
We had a guy Vision that used to call the
show back in the day, and legally blind Brett. So
we've had We've had a lot of callers and we
have many people that have also emailed me that are

(12:16):
in the blind community. So and at one point, guestcot
I was number one with blind people. It's pretty good.
Number one radio show, Colin Cowards number one like overall,
but I was number one with the blind. So anyway,
no person born blind has ever been diagnosed with schizophrenia.
That's great, it's never happened. Now, why would that be?

(12:36):
Guess why would that be? Is it because your eyes
lead you down that path? Yea? What was we learned?
Andrew Tolls the Dodger outfield, he was diagnosed as schizophrenic.
You know, it's it's interesting that you bring this up
because I was watching The Right Stuff the other night
and I was bs with my dad about how that
movie actually ended and with the palette going spinning out

(13:00):
of control after his jet had stalled, and I asked him,
I said, why didn't the pilot black out? And he
said part of it was because he wasn't the g
force wasn't hitting him as hard, but also because he
kept his eyes on the altitude. And he says that
you won't go into vertigo if you're looking just at
the altitude reading if you looked outside to see yourself spinning,

(13:25):
then you'd be placed into vertigo. Really, yes, that's interesting. Yeah,
it's pretty fascinating. That's your fun fact. These are odd
things I found surfing the internet that I figured I
might as well. Andrew Tolls, Jesus, that's sad. Yeah, you know,
it's actually very common. Those more than three million people

(13:45):
a year that are diagnosed with schizophrenia in the United States,
I think I think that number is right. I wonder
if that's going to rise here over the last like
three or four months with everything going on and being
people war, hallucinations, delusions and all that stuff. Right, Oh,
or are some other things here? All right? This is cool.
So in the in the early twentieth century, medicine was

(14:07):
not as advanced as it is today, and they recommended
for a strained athlete, they recommended the athletes that were
strained dose themselves with a bottle of champagne. And that
would they would And if you were like a sprinter
and you had an injury, you would be best cured

(14:30):
by two pints of champagne. It's good, solid, solid medical advice.
It was just my advice is just rubbed some dirt
on it. There you go. That's my advice. That's old
school advice. Babe, Ruth and alcohol and cigars. Yeah. Great
thing about Babe Ruth is we only remember him as
a big fat ass that eight hot dogs. But he
was a fine tuned athlete. Yeah with the Red Sox

(14:51):
and early with the Yankees, and I think he stole
home plate like ten times you get pitch and fucking
swing the stick. Yeah, and then we only remember him
as the fatty fatty Ruth. All right. Today's a children
this is called this is a good thing for for us.
Today's kids take about ninety seconds longer to run a
mile than their parents did. About that. That's pretty interesting, absolutely,

(15:15):
all right. And then one other thing that was interesting
to me. Nineteen forty eight, somebody posted this. There's an
ad that was posted by the people that make seven
Up and it recommended to mothers whose children did not
want to drink milk as the studio false party. They
they said, hey, uh, here's what you do. They recommended

(15:37):
a wholesome combination of seven Up and milk for kids.
And then there's an image here and they equal parts
milk and seven Up do not mix, and it will
make a delicious beverage that kids are gonna love. You.
Do you like uh milk? I do not like you

(15:58):
like ice cream? I love ice Do you like orange?
Orange sherbets? Like the uh, the popsicle sticks? I do
not mind it, although I am more of a cookie dough,
mint chip, chocolate chip. That's my that's my big three.
Typically sometimes strawberry, all right, I'll go strawberry occasionally. That's
usually where I go. I don't leave that that neighborhood much.
I bring that up because I used to date this uh.

(16:20):
I used to date this volatile Mexican girl then in
San Diego, and her drink of choice was Captain Morgan's
and orange juice, and Bennett tasted like orange sherbet. It
was absolutely delicious, like I'd never seen. Now you're just
endorsing that guest god, And you know I like My

(16:41):
big beverage is the ugly sweater party. I drink root
beer beer, do you yeah? I love it. It's got
high alcohol content, but it tastes like root beer. It's
fucking great. So what do you I say that against you?
You mixed together Captain morgan and and orange juice. Yes,
isn't that? What's a rood Driver's vodka in orange? Right? Correct?

(17:02):
But that doesn't taste that good So Captain Morgan and
orange yes. Yeah, And so my wife likes to drink occasionally.
She gets very upset with me that I don't drink much. Yeah,
I never see a drink, So this could be an
avenue for me to drink. Yes, and it tastes you
could you could get me to become a raging alcoholic.
I prefer not to do that, especially because you're not
working out at the gym. Al right, So Captain Morgan,

(17:24):
I'm gonna try that next time my wife on like
a Saturday and night, we have a little fire in
the back there and we burn away our sorrows. Yeah,
and I'll say, all right, we'll do this is what
we're gonna do. Yeah, Captain Morgan and orange juice. Now,
I don't know what kind of orange juice do you
usually drink anyway? Do you drink like the Tropicana orange
juice or just the whatever. I'm not an orange juice snob.
I'm not. I'm east of the Fouri five. You're west

(17:44):
of the four five. That's what you are. So you're
more concerned aboudy now that you really orange juice. The
real orange juice debate is paulp or No Paul. That's
the big debate. Paup or no Paul, And I'm fine
either way. I got a little bit of paulp but
too much is not good. Yes, I agree, Yeah, yeah,
I'll agree on that. Be sure to catch live editions
of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern
eleven pm Pacific. If you love to be remembered as

(18:07):
the person who gives the best birthday gifts, I'm here
to tell you that one eight hundred flowers dot com
is your ultimate birthday gifting destination. One eight hundred flowers
has thoughtful and artfully created options that are guaranteed to
deliver the best birthday surprise. Shop thousands of unique gifts
at one eight hundred flowers dot com for exclusive offers

(18:27):
and great values. To order today, visit one hundred flowers
dot com slash tune in. That's one eight hundred flowers
dot com slash tune in. What grows in the forest trees?
Sure no one else grows in the forest. Our imagination,
our sense of wonder, and our family bonds grow too,
because when we disconnect from this and connect with this,

(18:53):
we reconnect with each other. The forest is closer than
you think, Find a forest near you and start exploring.
I Discover the Forest dot org brought to you by
the United States Forest Service and the AD Council. Look
to your children's eyes to see the true magic of
a forest. It's a storybook world for them. You look

(19:14):
and see a tree. They see the wrinkled face of
a wizard with arms outstretched to the sky. They see
treasuring pebbles. They see a windy path that could lead
to adventure, and they see you there, fearless guide. Is
this fascinating world? Find a forest near you and start exploring.
A Discover the Forest dot org brought to you by

(19:34):
the United States Forest Service and the AD Council. All right,
and you want to do some dont six of sports
and we'll get to the mailback. Yeah, we can. We
can definitely do that. Have you do you know? First
of all, do you know anybody that's uh that has
had the coronavirus, like anyone in the in the family,
anyone or my wife's one of her great girlfriends, both

(19:55):
her parents had the coronavirus. Oh um, that is that.
And my mother in law works at a hospital in
Los Angeles and several of her co workers have had that.
I think that is the that's it. So it's like
three people loosely related that I in my circle that

(20:16):
no people that have had it directly. No. The only
one I guess would be guy in Cincinnati who's just
a pain in the ass, Justin and Cincinnati, who had it.
But he had it like right away, he had it
when this first thing went down there. Yeah, didn't he
fly across the country to get it? Well, he is flying.
He's flown across the country to get a lot of things. Yeah,

(20:38):
he's not afraid to spend, spend money and fly. The
friendlies Guy's good for him. Well, I bring that up
because of this, A sixty two year old man found
out that he had the coronavirus ben. He was placed
on a ventilator in a hospital in France and was
also left with the direction for four hours because he

(20:59):
had blood clots in his crank. So he was standing
at attention for four hours because of when they say
because of the corona, Yes, he had the blood clots. Wow,
those things you know in life, when you're a kid
and you're first learn learn about sex, You're like, man,
would that be great? Have that for four hours and

(21:20):
then when you get to a certain age, you're like, hold, crap,
that is not good. That is a that is a
terrible thing. Well that is you don't want no part
of that. It's it's odd. It's one of those things
that sounds like it would be great, but then in
actual execution not some Yeah, I kind of like this
podcast four hours is not enough. Anyways, then how about

(21:40):
this um since we're in cancel culture UM an online
petition right now as calling for Christopher Columbus in the
state of Ohio to be replaced to honor the life
of Chef Boyer. D Wait wait, wait, so they want
to honor Chef Boyard or they want to put a
Chef boy or b statue up. Yeah, they know, they

(22:02):
want to have a figure of him honoring him. Is
that yes, yes, it's a it's a recent change. Change
dot Org has an appeal going on right now for
the Cleveland City Council to remove the statue of Christopher
Columbus UM in Tony Brush Park in the Little Little
Italy neighborhood. And they want to have uh, yeah, they

(22:24):
want to have the new the new figurine that will
be placed in there. Well, this is this is odd
to me, and I'll tell you why. All right. First
of all, I have no problem with Chef Boyard. I
have no problem with Christopher Columbus per Se. Guy's been
dead for five hundred years. Who the hell cares? Yeah, um,
And I think part of America is you the legend,
the mythology that the folklore, right, the American folklore that

(22:45):
gets passed down from generation. But maybe I'm old and
I'm a you know, the people call me a boomer
because I think that stuff's mildly important. But but whatever
the case, So if you want to get rid of it.
But Chef Boyard, I thought that was dean racist that
was on the chopping block with you know, they got
rid of Uncle Ben, they got Rana Antremimah and I
you know, there have been people over the years that
have complained that it's mocking Italians, Chef Boyard, it's goofing

(23:08):
on the Italian heritage. Yeah. With that, And also I've
heard Gordon Fisherman could be in danger. Count Chocula is
also something that could be called raisins. This is the
by the way, the entire diet of Marcel and Brooklyn
is his entire diet he's gonna have to change because

(23:28):
all these products are now taboo and cancel culture. We'll see.
The one thing I could say for Chef boyd D
is he actually immigrated from Italy at the age of sixteen,
and then he came to Cleveland to open up. Doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter, just like that high school high schools that
have redskins on Indian reservations. Doesn't matter if people are offended,
even if they're not have no reason to be offended.

(23:49):
You got to cancel. Those are the rules. Cancel culture.
It's the world we live in now. Yeah. Um, every
time I hear of Chef Boyard though, I think of
the famous call when I was doing stuff at EI
and Marcel called up that show and he was so terrible.
It had nothing to say, And so I said, you
know what, I'm gonna try to ask him questions to
see if I can make this interesting. Yeah, And so

(24:12):
I said what you have for dinner? And Marcel then
said I had Chef boy r D. I had some
ravioli or whatever. It's good. So then I told marcell
I said, Marcella, I don't know if you know this,
but in Italy, the finest restaurants in Italy served chef
boy Ard Ravioli. H it's it's actually directly out of Italy,
and Marcell said, yeah, that's right. He's like agreeing with me. Yeah,

(24:35):
it was great, and you're doing this, it was so funny.
And that that led to food picks with Marcel. And
you're doing this at what one or two o'clock in
the morning. That was probably yeah, like one in the
morning or something like that. Poor bastard. Do you remember
Tommy Tubberville. I do, yes, the Auburn coach. Im sure,

(24:55):
he's he's a US Senate candidate and he was on
the campaign trail earlier this week. His campaign supposedly went
up in flames. Ben literally, he had a campaign bus
that was caught on the interstate up engulfed in flames.
Interstate fifty nine. The state was shut down, Yes, because

(25:16):
it caught fire. Wow, jeez, that's that's for those buses
when they light they man, it is it is a firebox. Yeah,
it's I've never seen a small bus fire. No, I've
I've driven like on the Vegas or Arizona out here
in the West and you go by it. Everyone saw
it was a tour bus on fire and that thing

(25:37):
is like a firepit. It is crazy anyway. Be sure
to catch live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays
at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific. If I could
be you and you could be me for just one hour,
if you could find a way to get inside each
other's mind, walcome mile in my shoes, Wacome Mile in

(25:57):
my Shoes. We've all felt left out, and for some
that feeling lasts more than a moment. We can change that.
Learn how it belonging begins with us dot org brought
to you by the ad Council Welcome Out in Machine.
Adoption of teams from foster care is a topic not

(26:20):
enough people know about, and we're here to change that.
I'm April Nuity, host of the new podcast Navigating Adoption,
presented by adopt us Kids. Each episode brings you compelling,
real life adoption stories told by the families that live them,
with commentary from experts. Visit adopt us Kids dot org
slash podcast, or subscribe to Navigating Adoption presented by adopt

(26:40):
us Kids, brought to you by the US Department of Health,
the Human Services Administration for Children and Families and the
ACT Council. Look to your children's eyes to see the
true magic of a forest. It's a storybook world for them.
You look and see a tree. They see the wrinkled
face of a wizard with arms outstretched to the sky.
They see treasuring pebbles. They see a windy path that

(27:03):
could lead to adventure, and they see you. They're fearless. Guide.
Is this fascinating world? Find a forest near you and
start exploring a Discover the Forest dot Org brought to
you by the United States Forest Service and the ad Council.
All right, anything else's that? Is it? All right? Let's
get to the mailbag. These are listener questions and these
are posted on our Facebook page every usually Wednesday, most week.

(27:26):
Some weeks we won't do the mailbag, but you can
post a question. Ben Maller's Show is our Facebook page.
Guys have been very good. We've gotten more more people
interacting on Facebook, which is a good to see and
I like that. I feel like it's better during the
day though it doesn't really work as much for what
we do on the live show, but I certainly check

(27:46):
it out and I post videos on there. You and
also if you don't want to post your comment publicly
and see everyone. Let everyone see it on Facebook, or
if you're not on Facebook, like guest Gone, you can
send me a message at Real fifth Hour at gmail
dot com. His first couple actually came from the email
bag Rick in San Ramon. He actually wanted to thanks.

(28:07):
It wasn't really a question, Guestcon. But he's worked for
the East Bay Police Department for twenty seven years, retired
in twenty seventeen. He's still working in law enforcement, just
at a different agency, and he's a fan. He does
appreciate the support that we have for the police. Well, Rick,

(28:28):
we do listen. Guestcon's obviously got an invested interest, but
I also have a bit of a vested interest in
that because my wife and her job. But yeah, I
hope you heard Rick the interview we did on Friday.
If not, go back and listen because Leo Terrell, who says,
this guy's been in lawsuits against law enforcement. Yeah, he's
a civil rights attorney, the fair minded civil rights attorney,

(28:51):
and he of all people you would think would be
leading the charge to get rid of the police. And
Leo's like, no, the police are important police and most
are good and that's what people with common sense would say.
But there's a lot of people that have no common sense,
that have an agenda, and right now they've got the
loudest bullhorn on the block. But but thank you many thanks. Yes,

(29:13):
all right, this is from Kyrie in OKC. He says, Hey, Ben,
you did a cameo for me on Father's Day. Thanks
made my man, It made my year. Man. Well, thank you, Kyrie.
It was fun to do it. I'm glad, glad I
was able to pull it off. I hope you had
a wonderful Father's Day there and your family spoiled the
hell out of you. It says, how come your best

(29:35):
of podcast on the radio show is so short? Kyrie says,
compared to the other Fox Sports Radio's best of podcasts?
Is that true, guest Cup, I didn't even know that
ours is a lot shorter than everyone else. You know what,
You'll have to ask your producer for that. One's that
is well out of my skille. Yeah. Kyrie then says,
please tell Coop to stop being lazy and give us
more content, please, Well, Kyrie, I did not know that.

(29:59):
I will have to look into that, but we have
four hours and I think the only other show that's
four hours is Jason Smith show. Everyone else does a
three hour show or less on the network, So we
have more content to pick from than any other show,
so we should have at least the same length on
the Best Of. But if you want to hear the
whole thing, you can hear the whole thing and just

(30:20):
fast forward to it. So it's up to you. I
know there are people that like the Best Of just
because it's a quick listening and you don't have to
listen to the whole thing. And in theory, you want
the best parts, right. It's like when you eat a
cinnamon roll. The best part of a cinema roll in
the middle part. I don't know, the entire role is
good for me? Bullshit? No, if you've ever had monkey bread,
right is I would call it. But it's all just

(30:40):
the middle part of a cinnamon roll. Yeah, oh god,
I should make that. I need to. I haven't made
that in a while. That's a great fat guy you
made that. I used to have. Well, Yeah, my wife Aaron,
she got me cooking and all that, and uh, but
that's a lot of prep. It is. It's actually not
as hard as you would think it. It is a

(31:00):
you just gotta make the steam stuff you'd make for
the cinnamon roll, and then you roll it up into
little balls and you put cinnamon on it and then
you stick it all together and it's you. It's actually
not that difficult to make. Wow, it's pretty interesting. Yeah.
And it's fucking delicious, Yes it is. It is awesome. Yeah.
And uh boy, you get fat eating man? Do you

(31:21):
get fat the sugar man? Yeah? So thank you, Kyrie.
I will, yeah, I will. Heads are gonna roll, heads
are gonna roll. But Cooper Loop all right, Jay from
New Bedford, Mass rights and he says they the sound
bites on the show are hilarious. How do Roberto and
Coop get them out so quickly? On the spot always
wondered that even with no live major sports, you guys

(31:43):
are killing it at night at night in and night out.
Thank you Jay. Well, Coop actually doesn't play any of
the sound bites. The people that say play sound on
the show are Roberto and actually Eddie. Believe it or not,
Eddie will play a lot of sound bites to during
the show kind of dress things up. So it's we've
got two people playing and sound bites, and sometimes the
Roberto and Eddie will play the same sound bite they're

(32:05):
they're thinking is the same and they think a sound
bite will works. So it's those guys. And the way
it works, to let you know, is we we have
in our in our studios there's computers obviously with all
of the equipment, and there's a board's got like these
little buttons and you have a mouse and you just
scroll over it and it's got like my page has
what do you think, forty or fifty sound bites. Yeah,

(32:28):
you've got multiple pages too, So there's sound bites from
obviously callers, yourself, the crew, um, obviously athletes and whatnot.
So you have a you have a gallery. That's what
you have. Yeah, we don't have guests on the podcast
or on that on the show we do on this
we have were not really guests. We have people we
like that hang out with us. Yeah, but I've done
really well with radio people. We Mike North, I consider

(32:50):
Leo Terrella radio guy. Even though he's a lawyer, John Sterling,
you know, yeah, you know what I'm saying, he might
identify himself as a lawyer. First I would say radio guy. Yeah,
radio guy. You're love the radio guy. I think I mean,
I don't know, you probably disagree with me on this,
but sound drops for you, I think the top one

(33:12):
is your sports cliche. Sound drops up? What are you
going out? Specifically? What are you? Yeah? You had two
athletes that took Oh you talk about oh Scott Podsednik, Yeah,
pod Segni was his number one for sure. Yeah. My
favorite one is the one from the old Cubs manager
Lee Elia. Eighty five percent of the world's fuck it working.

(33:34):
The other fifteen percent come out here. It's a playground
for the blank blanks. It's hilarious. The one thing you
can't do is attack the customer. Yeah, and he didn't
just attack the customer, he went all in. All right,
thank you Jay for that question. Brady from Massachusetts. Right
since this first time new listener, I've been listening to
the Final Hour every week for the last two years. Well,

(33:56):
thank you, Brady. One question I have for you is
who is your favorite cabinet member, Coop, Eddie or Master
Cheffer Bird. I guess he would include you here, guests
gunn h. Well he didn't include you. Actually, he just
included the people on the radio, So I guess of
that group, Eddie's been with me the longest. So if
you had to pick a favorite, I guess I would

(34:17):
go with Eddie because we've been together. Eddie started a
couple of years I think it was either a couple
of years or a year after I started, And I
started like a week after Fox Sports Radio launched, So
we've seen a lot of crazy stuff hiding in the
shadows at Fox Sports Radius. I would of that group.
You're never supposed to say your favorite kid is, but whatever,

(34:39):
not my kids, I'll go with Eddie. Travis in Roseberg, Oregon.
That says one of you guys heading to Vegas, and
what's the first thing gambled? It says one of you
guys rather heading to Vegas, what's the first thing gambled
on you? The sports book or the first table machine
through the door? All right, so Travis, this is not
a bad question. Now gonna tell you how I roll.

(35:01):
I am such a freak when it comes to the gambling.
I don't even wait to Vegas. I drive gascon flies,
so he doesn't have the same experience. He's west of
the four oh five, but I'm east of the four
through five. So I drive to Vegas and when I
get to the Nevada state line. There's a place called
prim Nevada. Gascon doesn't know that because he doesn't drive

(35:21):
to Vegas. Prim is a border city. There's Whiskey Pets
and Buffalo Bills, two hotels. That's it. There's a mall,
and there's some fast food restaurants in a gas station,
a couple of gas stations. That's all that's in prim Nevada.
Nothing else. I stop in prim Nevada because when I
go to Vegas, normally, if I leave because I do

(35:44):
the overnight and I'll wake up and by the time
I get there, I will miss the East Coast games,
I will not be able to wager on the East
Coast games. So what I do is I go to
I usually go I think it's Whiskey Petz, one of
the there's like three hotels there, but when I forget
which one, I go into one of them, and I'll
run to the sports book to try to beat because

(36:04):
the game starts four o'clock in the Pacific time zone,
and I'll try to get in there and put my
bets in and then I'll keep driving to Vegas. No
one I got a little action, and then I'll try
to listen to the game as I'm on the way
on one of the apps on my phone, so I
can hear what's going on. I go a little bit
different because if I fly, I obviously want to get
it there early before any of the games. So I'll

(36:27):
dip my toes into into a football game if it's
on a Sunday or Saturday for college ball. But after that,
I immediately go to the tables and I'll go craps
first to see if there's a bad table. There was
some poor rollers, and if that's the case, I'll sit
on that one for a while, and if it's not,
I'll go find a blackjack table that's completely empty because

(36:47):
I like playing against the dealer heads up. That's always
always the case. My favorite, my favorite sports book, I
don't know if you if you have a favorite ben
but it's Legassi Stadium that's under that's actually underneath the
Venetian and Pola. So because it's a it's a massive
sports book, but it actually looks like a giant movie
theater too. Like in the middle of the other sports
book you have all the like reclining and couch seats

(37:10):
with a giant flat screen TV, and then the book
in front of you used to can place your wagers,
and then surrounding it, it's a bar so you can
look over with television's all around the place. That's probably
my favorite sports book. MGM's pretty good. The Win's pretty
pretty nice as well, but we Goss is probably my favorite. Yeah,
if you want to go, what's the the Orleans? If
you want to have a smokey kind of, you know,

(37:33):
Vegas type situation, the Orleans. I used to love the Aria. Yeah,
one of the guys got upset with me because he's
the guy that used to run it. He's not there anymore,
but he was a big Mets fan. And I've told
the story before, but I stopped getting Freebee's guest gone
because I I ripped, you know, a Chase Utley role

(37:55):
at second base, and I ripped the Mets shortstop because
he was in the wrong position and that's why he
got hurt. And this guy got all upset. Matt in Rochester,
New York, right since says everyone has been or stayed
in a bad hotel in their life, do you guys
have a bad hotel experience story that you can tell. Yeah,

(38:16):
of course, Matt, I've stayed at some really shitty hotels.
When I was at Saddleback, we traveled to I think
it was the San Jose to do a game and
we got the cheapest hotel because we had a very
small budget college radio. And I remember the hotel. We
stayed at each side of us. On each side of

(38:39):
the room we were in, there were families living in
the hotel and it was not the greatest hotel in
the world. It had not been updated in a long time.
And I felt really bad. I mean, there's always kids,
and they weren't just there on vacation that was their home.
They were living in hotel. And then the worst hotel
experience though I ever had, was that was just depressing
because I felt bad for these kids. You know, they
didn't have a place in them. You know, anyone live

(39:00):
in a shitty hotel with your a kid, But they
didn't know any better. So I was in New York
and I was trying to I was using my brother
and I said, you know, I was with my other brother,
my younger brother, and we found this cheap hotel in
New York. Is a couple of blocks away from my
brother who lives kind of near the East Village a
little bit on the East Village, and so we got

(39:22):
to the hotel. I didn't really read the fine print
when I booked a room gascon it was a five story.
We wasn't if you're on the first floor, it was fine.
We were on the fifth floor. It's a five story
walk up in Manhattan. As I remember it no working
air conditioning in the summertime in New York City. I
was very fat at this time, so imagine fat guy

(39:44):
five story walk up. The other thing I recall is
the bathroom was so small. How small was it? I'm
glad you got. It was so small. I could not
actually sit to drop a deuce. I could only do
a number one. I couldn't do a number two because
my legs were too long. And there was literally a
wall right in front of the toilet that you could

(40:04):
not You could barely squeeze in there and kind of,
you know, hover over it and do your business, but
you could not. I was too tall to sit on it.
So that was my worst hotel experience. What about you,
oh man, My worst hotel experience takes me back to
the to the glory days of us kinda. I was
in San Diego at the time I was. I was

(40:24):
going to San Diego State and this girl that I
wanted a date for the longest time was back in
LA and she said, hey, come up, I'm free this weekend.
So I met up with her in like Hermosa Rodno,
Manhattan Beach, that area one night, and we were drinking

(40:45):
and you know, obviously we couldn't drive after that, so
we needed a hotel and I didn't know where the
fuck to go. I hadn't been back in LA for
a long time, and so we got into a cab
and I just said, hey, make your way down PC
eight and we'll find like the first hotel that we
can see, We'll go to ben. I went to the

(41:05):
spot and remember the name was in Torrents. It's called
El Dorado. It was this motel. It looked like Ship Dorado. Yeah,
I get a room charged by the hour. Yes, they
charged by the hour. And when I booked the room,
or I booked it, but I got it. I go
inside and the first thing I see as I enter
into the door is two bullet holes onto the chain

(41:28):
which you like chain the door locked, So there's two
bullet holes there. On top of that, it was a
small bathroom like the one you just mentioned and it
cracked mirror above the bed. Have you ever stated at
a did you feel like you were gonna get bedbugs? When? Yeah?
I like that one. Yeah. One time I was at
a hotel in Vegas and you know, you always think, wow,

(41:51):
they don't really clean the rooms, but now maybe they do.
You don't know for sure. Yeah, So I go into
the hotel and we checked in at the casino in Vegas,
and we get the room and there was a guy's
driver's license and like part his wallet was on the
table little table to sit at, you know, And I
was like, yeah, that means no one came in here

(42:11):
and actually looked this over at all. Man. Last time
I went to a bachelor party in Vegas to stay
at the Cosmopolitan, and that's expensive Cosmo. I'll check this out.
I got a free that's a that's a chickotoe right,
yeah for the ladies. Yeah, I check in there. All
of a sudden, we feel this this like the ground
moving a little bit, and we and we smell the

(42:32):
stench ben the plumbing underneath the building. There's a burst
and a pipe. It was all this sewage that came
out on the street. And then on top of that,
we go into the room and I swooped down the
room like you're talking about, I found a used condom
in the bed. No, no, you did, I swear to you.
I did. So they upgraded our room and I got

(42:54):
a different spot. But yeah, like there was sewage. You
got a lawsuit there. Yeah, I have a case traumatic experience.
I was in Vegas last in December, before the apocalypse. Yeah,
and we were walking around the strip outside New York,
New York, right near that NHL arena, and there was
a sewer leak and the entire strip smelled like shit.

(43:16):
As I mean, the eight was Une was so strong.
The smell, I mean, you felt like you had moved
into the squatty potty or the or the the porta
potty rather. Yeah, you felt like you had moved into
a porta potty or whatever. It was like unreal. It
was like, uh, you know that Tennessee trots like somebody

(43:38):
had dysenterry, but the entire street had dysenterry. You know,
it wasn't a steaming dump. It was just unreal. Um anyway,
so there you go. Moving on trucker, Joe says, if
you could go back to any era in time. What
era would it be? Era being like anything prior to
two thousands. You know, it would be interesting if I

(44:00):
could be guaranteed to come back. I quote William Shakespeare
a lot. Many of the phrases we use are from
William Shakespeare. So he was from like the sixteen hundred,
fifteen hundreds, early sixteen hundreds. I think he was in
his prime there. Yeah, I'm curious if the legend lives
up to the reality is as good as the legend,

(44:22):
or if I'd be like, this is fucking terrible. Why
are we quoting Shakespeare four hundred years later, five hundred
years later? Whatever? I guess that. What about you, Gasca,
I think I'd probably go all the way back to
the to the Roman Empire. I would love to see
or maybe even be involved coming back alive, of course.
But the being inside the Colosseum, oh yeah, watching the gladiators,

(44:45):
which are actually like slaves, right. I'm surprised they haven't
torn down the Colosseum because there were slaves that were
fighting the animals. Not yet, never know, but that would
be amazing to be a part of something like that.
Fox Sports RADI has the best sports talk lineup in
the nation. Catch all of our shows at Fox Sports
Radio dot com and within the iHeartRadio app search f

(45:09):
SR to listen live. Yeah, yeah, you wonder. I think
if you could use the knowledge that you know in
the modern world, and a lot of it wouldn't translate
them to that time, so it would be useless. Yeah,
all right, Pierre from Springfield, Ish, Massachusetts. By the way, Pierre,
my grandfather, the guy that I quote a lot who

(45:32):
spoke Yiddish when I was a kid, when he didn't
want us to know what the bad words he was saying,
and I learned some Yiddish words from him. He is
from Springfield, mess so I have some some bloodlines there. Anyway,
Any chance of getting some old co workers on the podcast,
maybe fill in for Gascoud, KK, Marcel Julio, maybe even

(45:53):
an old caller like Gay Brad or Troy the Gambleman. Well,
that's you're going way back, Pierre. I don't think we
can even call gay Brad gay Brad now because someone
will be triggered us to. Yeah, gay guy from Tennessee
who he chose the name gay Brad as a caller. Yeah,
and he was kind of an effeminine gay guy that
called the show and was a character for several years.

(46:15):
Troy the gambling Man was great. He drove a sweeper
truck around Nashville and we had him picking games. I
don't know what happened to Troy. I used to have
a correspondence with Troy. I don't know. I haven't heard
from him in years. I don't know if he's still around.
I don't know what's going on, Troy. If you're listing,
check in with me. I'd love to hear from Troy
the gambling Man. That would be pretty cool. Jerry says,
when's another talent show? By the way, just to answered

(46:37):
that last guy from Springfield? Maybe next week, yesca, we
might do a day and just put one of these
old people on that I used to work with and
go down memory lane. You've worked with a lot of people.
That's a lot. That's true. There's a lot of options,
but catch up with an old producer, find out what
it was like. Yeah, yeah, I could do that. Jerry says,

(46:57):
when when's there gonna be another talent show? I can't wait.
I'm gonna win it. Well, Jared, we just did one
during the Apocalypse and Sports are supposed to come back
in late July, and so if that happens, we'll probably
not do another one. But if everything gets wonky and
shuts down again, I will go back to my bag
of tricks and we will certainly do that as well.

(47:20):
This kind of relates to that, Carlos, and Houston says,
why did you stop doing the Power Hour on the show? Carlos,
That's a good question. People have been asking me that. Well,
I know the answer because it was awful radio and
it was very lazy, and you had to come to
Jesus moment. You know, No, it will do something better
for the audience as opposed to no, no, no, no, no, no.
I thought it was very interesting. I thought it was

(47:40):
it was compelling, and it was fun with Cowboy and
Windsor and several of the guys were great and it
was a lot of fun. Chris and Houston, Sean the
hood Guy. I thought all those guys were very good. Yeah,
but Felexis was so bad the last one that we did.
It was so terrible and so painful that I just
said I can't, I gotta take it. But I was

(48:03):
suffering from PTSD. I this post traumatic stress disorder because
of how bad that was. And so if you want
to blame anybody, blame America's favorite drag queen, the only
known drag queen caller of sports radio Filexus, because that
is boy. That was nightmare causing that was things that
go bump in the night. That is what it was.
So that's the answer. Carlos says, I also do hope

(48:25):
to see you here in Houston if you decide to
come with Carlos, I'd love to meet you, and I
will get to Houston. I'm hoping to go this year,
but unfortunately right now that's off the table. But I'm
hoping and I am optimistic Benny Brightside that I am
able to go and hang out with you, Carlos and
some of the other big fans. Which is great guest

(48:47):
gun because I'd take a lot of potshots at the Astros,
the Astros and the Texans and the Roquetts. But yet
we have a very solid loyal branch of the Mallard
militia that do not mind being pummeled, are having their
teams pummeled on the radio. When is here's one from
Jason and Bakersfield. When is guests God going to start

(49:08):
playing more sound effects on the Fifth Hour podcast? All right,
So this is something I get asked a lot guests.
We are in a different studio. That isn't that the issue? Guests, gon,
we're in a different studio, so you don't have access
to the same sound effects that we have on the
radio show. Yeah, part of that, and plus we just
go more long long form talk. And a show is

(49:29):
obviously different than a podcast because these are are dedicated
to you, the listeners. So if you're gonna have questions
and answers or whatnot, I don't like to play sound
drops during that. I mean I could, technically speaking, but
we have a lot of guests and friends of the
show that come on, so we don't want to interrupt
them with any sound drops or anything like that. It
is an odd thing, though, when the sound effects, because
there's some people like our friend here in Bakersfield who

(49:52):
loves it, yeah, and then there's other people like that
snowflake a funhouse who it thinks it's like the Hindenburgh
when he hears the bell, you know, it's like, oh
my god, loose Tonza is sinking, and it's like, you know,
come on, it's the redundancy of the bell that it's
getting played over and over and over again, that he

(50:12):
does not like you not control any of these sound
effects at all. Chris from seven to eighty, Edmonton, Alberta says,
if Doc Mike possessed the same qualifications as doctor Fauci,
well you recommend you're in therapy. Yeah good, he says,
uh yeah, I was a little uncomfortable. Doc called up
the other night and says that some woman who has

(50:33):
cancer he's gonna help. And I was like, oh, this
is not you know. I mean, I get a kick
out of Doc. I think he's pretty good and entertaining,
but that kind of stuff. Yeah, yeah, that's going you're
going too far. Of course, Doc is convinced that that
he's he's got the magic the magic beans. Vall's fan

(50:54):
Jimmy from Fayetteville, Tennessee, says, if you were elected president
and had to may take these callers with you, what
would their jobs be? Doc Mike, Skeeter, Tammy and Montana
and mister Tibbs. Wow, I've not heard mister tibbs name,
and he didn't call the show. He hasn't called a
long time. Mister Tibbs fun caller. I don't know what
happened to him. Uh, well, that's let's see. I guess

(51:15):
I would have Doc Mike would have to be the
health guy, right, he would be the attorney, the surgeon general. Yeah,
I think what would Tammy's job be? What would she
she could be like in charge, she could work at
like the Pentagon, do something at the Pentagon. Yeah, she's
very feisty and battles back and counterpunches. Wow. What about Skeeter?

(51:40):
What our good guy Skeeter do? What could he our
buddy Skeeter do? Where is he from? Well, he's from Montana,
but he's got a he's got an interesting career. He's
been in the military, he's lived an interesting life. And
you can make him your chief of staff chief of staff,
all right? And then mister Tibbs. What would mister Tibbs
be like? What was his calling cardon? I don't really

(52:03):
know much about mister Tibbs other than he told some
wild stories when he'd called the show about his neighbors
and random things. And yeah, I'm not sure one of
their jobs in the cabinet there? How about the Well,
this would be a fun job, mister Tipps is always,
always would be mesmerized when he talks. So how about
the press secretary? Yeah, I can get out. I don't know.

(52:24):
You could have blind Scott as your press secretary. He'd
be like fighting with reporter throw Hay Bakers and disinformation. Yea,
Jack in Greensboro? Right? Since this Ben, how where did
you first meet missus Maller? Also? Once you realized she
was interested in you, did you make did that make

(52:44):
her less desirable since she apparently has either mental deficiencies
or poor judgment? Well, thank you, Jack, very kind of
you to say that you might you met her west
of the furrow five. I know that firsthand. Uh. No,
I did not meet her west the fire. Oh you
did you? I did not? You married her west of
the four O five as well? No, I did not.

(53:05):
There's no four or five freeway in the garden island
of Kiss the four five in POI poo, I got married. Uh. No,
I met my wife. I was doing internet dating and
I met her and then we went out and then
I didn't hear from her for a while. I think
you know she wasn't interested. Um and uh, but then
she contacted me again and we first date we went

(53:28):
on was in Pasadena, great city, beautiful Pasadena, Yes, right
there in Colorado Boulevard. And we were supposed to go
to a movie. Um, and she she did bait and switch.
She said, I because my idea of a perfect date
was to go to the movies, and then because you
don't have to talk. Yeah, it's like the Power Hour. Yeah,
so um so anyway, uh she she we met at

(53:50):
the movie theater and she's, uh, why don't we Uh,
why don't we go over here instead? And so we
talked and then it worked out well. But yeah, clearly
she's got poor judgment. That is That is obvious, Jack,
no question about it. A dub Bar writes, and he says,
why don't you post and ask for questions for the
Fifth Hour podcast on Twitter? Why is it always Facebook? Um? Well,

(54:12):
a dub the reason for that is I'm down on
the Twitter. I'm down on the Twitter. I think we
get better questions on Facebook. I've done it on on Twitter.
It's just not it's a cesspools. I use it during
the show, and I have You've noticed I don't nearly
post as much as I used to. I just don't.
It's not something I'm really a big fan of I

(54:33):
just don't like the way that that platform has gone
very much. So but to each their own, and we
still use it during the show, but that's not doesn't
seem to work for this jess In Pomona writes in
and he says, hey, man, my question is what is
the strangest thing you did doing press a date? And
that's for both you and guest County. Well, yeah, Jess, I,

(54:57):
I did not really do a lot. That's part of
my problem. I mean, I guess the most I would
do to impress a date was to take a shower
and maybe putting on a nice shirt or something like that.
But yeah, I'd always like hide the fact that I
worked in radio and didn't, you know, didn't really promote that.
Uh you know, not that many women listen to sports
radio because they don't, so it's not like they would
know who I was. But I just gonna whatever. But

(55:18):
what you guess got you're west of the four or five.
You probably just took him to your house and said,
look at my house, look at the Pacific Ocean. I'm
west of the four or five. Man. There's some embarrassing moments. Yeah, yeah,
it's like, Um, it's like when you when you go
to to Vegas and you lose quickly on a hand
of blackjack and you need to rush to the ATM

(55:39):
because you're ari in the hole. Yeah, you're trying to
dig yourself out. Like I've had that happen a few
times where I've gone on a date and you know,
whatever you're doing, like if I'm you know, ordering dinner
or something like that, you kind of get just deep
into what you're doing. You're like, let's order this, let's
order that, let's order this, and let's order that, and
then you know all then you find out you're ordering

(56:01):
too much. You're trying to impress her, and it looks
pretty fucking weak. Yeah, one of the signs to tell
that a woman's into you. Usually this maybe has changed,
but when I was dating, when you first go to restaurants,
they would order like a salad or something small. And
then the longer you date and then they're eating like
chocolate Sundays and they're they're going for Yeah, yeah, you're anyway.

(56:22):
R J and san Antonio rights and says, hey, what
is your favorite Saturday Night Live skit? Well, I haven't
watched Saturday Night Live very much in years. But some
of my favorites they were They were guests on Saturday
Night Penn and Teller many years ago. It's on YouTube.
They did this skit where they were hanging upside down,
but you didn't know that was the gag, but she

(56:43):
didn't know until the end of it, and it was amazing.
I was like, as a kid, I was like, Wow,
that's the coolest thing in the world. Some of the
other ones I loved being a Jewish kid. I loved
hanaka Harry, which was John Lovitz did that back in
the day. Eddie Murphy did Mister Robinson's neighborhood. Remember that. Yeah,

(57:03):
that would be canceled right now, wouldn't it. That would
not be allowed. The Church Lady was pretty funny. Stewart Smalley,
anything for you guess on. One of my favorites, and
everybody likes this one was the Christopher walkin Will Ferrell
cow Bell, Yeah, that was not bad, timeless. I used
to love and Living Color, by the way, that was

(57:24):
your your gig, that was your show. Jim Carrey was
was fantastic. The Wayne's Brothers, but yeah, Jim Carrey was
was fucking phenomenal in living color. It's a great show Kentucky.
Tay Wrightson says hotter than Kentucky. J I would hope, so, says,
I don't believe in reincarnation. However, the idea is pretty
cool to me. If you could come back as a

(57:45):
child of any athlete, who would it be and why? Uh? Well,
I would go I don't know, Michael Jordan, because on
top of the world dominating, I would inherit all that money.
That would be pretty cool. So I guess I would
go with that. Guess God quickly, man, I think I'm

(58:06):
either going Tiger Woods or Derek Jeter. He didn't have
any kids. Will he stop playing? Yeah? But you know what,
his Hall of Fame roster of the women that he
nailed is pretty fucking phenomenal. His check mark list. Yeah.
And the gift box or the gift bag before the
disclosures that you gotta like drop off your cell phone
and then you get a gift bag when you get

(58:26):
kicked out. That's pretty good. Derek Jeter all pro man,
All right, Chris and mac Keita. Iowa easier for me
to say, says, Please explain who gets the extra home
game when NFL goes to seventeen games, and why, well, Chris,
that's easy. I believe what they're planning on his eight
home games, eight road games, and then a neutral sight game. Yeah,
that's the plan. And then also why this is the

(58:47):
universal dge A good idea this year? The season is
a waste, so let's try it. No, it's a good idea, Chris,
because the players are pussy willows and their mister softies
the pictures and in the eight percent of them don't
give two ships about hitting. They don't even try. And
pictures make so much money starting pictures that they they're

(59:08):
trying to insulate. It's all about risk management, and they're
worried that a picture is gonna get hit on the
wrist and be out, and they're gonna lose value on
the contract, equity in the contract, and they're gonna be
injured running the basis. So that's pretty much one. Plus,
they need to boost television ratings with the games already
being missed. More offense, more runs, and they believe there's
more inches, so an extra bat in there, all right.

(59:30):
Last one Trees in San Antonio says, why do we
park on a driveway? Yet? Drive on a parkway. And
why does guests gone park in more than one spot
at a time, Because I can what a dick west
of the four five and that's your west of the
four or five privilege. Apologize, apologize at least to the
four or five. I park in one space. Listen, you

(59:53):
don't park every time you park in two spaces. That's
a dog whistle to the people who lives four or five.
You're mocking us. You are mocking us. Guest gone, how
dare you? Yeah? Anyway, all right, listen, have a wonderful
rest of your Sunday. Don't forget back on the magic
radio box tonight on the Ben Mallers Show and cameocameocamo.

(01:00:14):
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