October 14, 2023 • 39 mins
Ben Maller & his 5th Hour homie Danny G. have some Saturday fun for you! They're talking: It's Not Trigonometry, To the Gun Rack, Fly-Over, Foodie Fun, & more!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kabbooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to the Clearinghouse
of hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth
(00:23):
Hour with Ben Mahller starts right now.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
In the air every way. It's the Fifth Hour with
Ben Mahler and Danny g Radio. And we know that
there are eight gazillion podcasts, but we do thank you
for listening to this podcast and not some other crappy podcasts.
(00:49):
So we do thank you for that, Dany Gye. It
is Saturday, a glorious day here, a great opportunity to
enjoy collegiate football and bet On college football and all that,
and also watch Benny Versus the Penny, which is airing
all over the place. And so we've got a lot
(01:09):
a lot going on here. Dan, There's a lot of
things going on.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
And I feel like you and some other listeners who
have gambled for a long time, because I have the
itch now I wish I was in Vegas, not just
for the Raiders and Patriots, but so that I could
go to one of the kiosks and make some NFL bets.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Well, eventually in California you'll be able to bet. That's
when it gets dangerous, right when you can just bet
and all that stuff. And the other thing too, about
the whole gambling. My buddies in Vegas, they don't even
go to the casino kiosk. They just do it on
their phone. Yeah, it's like and they bet on they
bet on games in Uh, this actually inspired. You just
(01:53):
inspired a story. You just inspired, You just facilitated, Danny
g a story that I was told this past week
actually about in game betting. Okay, so you know in
game betting. He was not a self explanatory. If you're
not a gambler, maybe you don't know. But you can
literally bet on like everything that happens. You can bet
(02:15):
on whether the next pitch is going to be a
strike or a ball. You can like, there's endless possibilities
of what you bet. I bring that up because a
friend of mine, who I will not name because he
works for corporate Major League Baseball, but I've known this
guy for a long time. And he was showing me
around before the Dodger Diamondback playoff game, and he took
(02:37):
me into a booth that I had never been in,
and he explained, I said, well, that's where I sit,
and there's a couple other people and and you know,
like and then there's this person over here off to
the side, and their job. Their job is to relay
(02:59):
what's going on on back to the bookmakers and what happened.
And this is what we talk about a great job
because they had this in game betting, but with the
delay to get a TV broadcast to the satellite, up
to the satellite and back down, or even if it's online,
there's a delay, right, there's some lag time.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
I was going to ask you this very question.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
Yeah, So what they have done to circumvent to cut
off those, let's say, I don't know, unethical or gamesmanship
type fans. I guess they were concerned about people having
somebody at the game relaying, hey, this pitch is a strike,
quickly bet it's going to be a strike, and then
(03:44):
just bankrupting the casino. They're not in the business of
losing money. So Major League Baseball employees someone to relay
in real time on the phone and the internet, real
time what's going on. So their only job is every
(04:05):
pitch or if it's a foul ball, where does it go?
Or all that that is their that's their gig to
be ahead of the TV broadcast.
Speaker 4 (04:13):
That is a cool job.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yeah. And I was told that every sport has someone
because gambling is so popular now, every professional sport that
you can bet on, which is all of them, the
NFL has it, the NHL, NBA, they all employ someone
in house in the arena at these games to make
sure there's no funny business and nothing gets pickled, as
(04:37):
Alf the Alien opineer would say. And so I thought,
I thought that was interesting. I was not planning on
telling that story, but you just you mentioned the kiosk
of the gambling, and that popped in my head randomly.
So there you go. On this podcast we have it's
not trigonometry, it's not trigonometry to the gun rack. I
(04:58):
believe that's also on this podcast, A fly I over
footy fun And I think, well, I think we'll save
other stuff that we were going to do yesterday to
the Mailbag podcast on Sunday, so we'll have some pop
culture on a Sunday, but today is Saturday, and we'll
start with this back to the Tales of the Life
of Mahler and Danny g So another story related about
(05:20):
Dodger Stadium. Yesterday we talked about how randomly Fernando Valezuela
happened to sit down at a table I was sitting
at to eat some spaghetti, which which was interesting and random.
And I would like to point out that's that's in
my top five random people to sit down at my
table in the Other ones on that list include Tommy Heinzen,
(05:43):
the late Celtics broadcaster on Celtics legend who happened to
sit down at my table randomly, Billy Crystal at a
at a Clipper game. He's on that short list of
people that sat down there, John Cena years ago at
a Laker game, and there's a couple others that. Anyway,
(06:03):
I sound like Pat O'Brien dropping it. So I had
to use some mall of math. Now, you know, I
use Malard math on the radar. I love Malon math.
I use malarmth all the time. Malamoth is great. I'm
not a numbers guy, but that doesn't seem to add up. Yeah,
so headline Los Angeles one thousand, Vin Scully Way Media
Freeloaders update mentioned things a little different in the playoffs
(06:28):
Baseball playoffs. So they provide snacks for the media freeloaders
for free. That means you can get like a bag
of Cheetos or a candy bar or something like that
for free. But there is no hot lunch. They don't
serve a hot lunch. They used to serve like a
box lunch. But baseball there's so many media people, I mean,
(06:51):
it's like a beehive in there, so many media people
that they stopped doing that a couple of years ago.
So what they do is they give you the working
media in air quotes a meal voucher. It's like weed
man hippie in Miami gets food stamps. The media gets
a voucher. And so you used to get this lunch,
(07:12):
this box lunch. They don't do that anymore. So they
hand out this meal ticket. Now the meal ticket is
good for twenty dollars. That's it, no more, no less.
So it seems like a lot of money, right, twenty
bucks whatever, But you got to read the fine print.
Can't buy alcohol with it. You know, there's just like
there's restrictions on food stamps. You can't buy alcohol with it.
You can, you have to use it at the concession
(07:33):
stands in the ballpark. And so it's kind of self explanatory.
But you have twenty dollars to spend, and you you
have to spend it all. If you go over the
twenty dollars. If the item you're ordering, let's say it's
like twenty five dollars, you've got to pay five dollars.
You've got to pay the difference. Now, should you go under,
(07:55):
should you buy something that is not twenty dollars, they
don't give you change, You don't get the pocket the difference.
That money goes back to them. You leave money on
the table.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
Can you use this card more than once?
Speaker 1 (08:11):
No, that thing you can only use it once. I
am such a radio loser. I'm a man on a mission.
I was methodical. I was neurotic about this, Danny, Okay,
So I'm like, you know, I don't want to leave
money on the table.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
I I You're like a price is right contestant trying
to get to nineteen dollars and ninety nine.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
Cents exactly exactly. So I'm out there. I got my
calculator at I'm crunching the numbers, right, I'm circumventing Dodger Stadium,
the concession stands there. I'm going going around crunching all
the stats and it's not trigonometry, but it's pretty close.
So I didn't realize, because you know, I don't hang
(08:58):
out with the unwashed just I knew the prices were
outrageous at Dodger Stadium, but I did not realize the
levels they go to gouge the hardcore Dodger fans that
go out to the ballpark. I was blown away. I
guess the Putin price hack. I didn't realize it had
gone to that level. I remember you told the famous
story about Opening Day. Was that last year, Danny or
(09:19):
this year.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
Two seasons ago?
Speaker 3 (09:22):
I believe in it was Opening Night where we spent
almost one thousand dollars for our family to.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Go thousand bucks to go to a freaking baseball game. Anyway,
Oh my god. So I'm walking around, I'm like, well,
what do I want to eat? That's the first thing,
But what's in my budget? So I saw, well, there's
a beef nacho helmet that looks kind of good, but
that's twenty. That's twenty dollars and fifty cents. I don't
(09:47):
want to have to pop. I don't have to spend
fifty cents. Then I saw there's a cheese steak stand
at dig Your.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Goal really was to not go over twenty, not even
by a quarter exactly.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
No, I'm I'm not kidding, Danny.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
I was.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
I was dissecting this. I was like, I was like, well,
then I looked at this, this giant cheese steak that
was twenty five bucks, twenty four to ninety nine for
a giant cheese steak.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
Oh, so you're not spending five dollars of your own money.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
No chance. So then my friend Steve Futterman, who used
to work at CBS, the great news reporter, Steve Futterman,
who I've known for years. So Futterman's there and he's like, hey,
I want to go get some food. I'm gonna go
get a pizza. So he went to the California Pizza
Kitchen at Dodger Stadium where they have the barbecue chicken pizza.
(10:35):
You can get that for sixteen dollars and fifty cents
plus tax. But I did the math on that, and
I would have been leaving like a dollar and some
change on the on the on the MLB's dime, I
would have been giving back some money. I was like, well,
I can't do that. So then I saw they had
cotton candy, but it was five fifty and I don't
(10:56):
like cotton candy anyway, I'm not nine years old. So
it was five point fifty for sugar that is spun
five fifty for that. I couldn't get past that. So
then I'm like, all right, well, what about a bag
of peanuts. That can't be that much seven bucks for
a bag of peanuts. So I was like, okay, I
could do I could do two bags of peanuts, but
(11:17):
I can't do three because three would go over. So
I can only do two bags of peanuts. That's it.
So I'm scrutinizing this. And then it got to the
point where I was like, well, maybe if I I
was so desperate to get exactly twenty dollars that they
had a pickle for four ninety nine, so I thought
I could get four. I don't even like pickles. I
hate pickles. Alfie alien O Piner likes pickles. I don't
(11:39):
like pickles. So but I was like, well, wait a minute,
fir for a moment, Danny in my head, I'm like, okay,
I can get four pickles, that's twenty bucks. But then
they add the tax, so the tax would have bumped
me over the twenty dollars. So I can't do that.
So I'm moving around right, I'm bobbing and weaving like
I do on benny versus a penny, and I'm breaking
things down. I'm analyzed everything and I'm getting into it.
(12:03):
I'm very surgical, very surgical when i'm doing this, and
you know i'm doing my thing. I'm using precision. So
then I realized, you know what I really like, but
I haven't had in a while a soft pretzel. So
then I was like, how much is a soft pretzel?
And there it was, the King sized soft pretzel. Hey
(12:25):
you Jesus, five ninety nine, five ninety nine.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
What about the melted nacho cheese?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Well, I could not afford that. That was out of
my budget. They were charging this blew me away. I
thought this was the most outrageously, most offensive thing I
could comprehend or I witnessed at Dodger Stadium two twenty
five for a cup of nacho cheese Dawn. Now two
twenty five that's a side item twenty five for a
(12:57):
little small cup.
Speaker 4 (12:58):
That's a seventy five per cent them. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
So what I did, Danny, is I realized I have
I have a hack that I can get the cheese cup.
I can circumvent the two twenty five for the cheese cup,
but I need the pretzels, and there's no way to
get the pretzels other than the here. So I made
an executive decision, and I punched the numbers into my
calculator using Malormath. I purchased three five ninety nine king
(13:28):
size soft pretzels at Dodger Stadium. They added the tax, Danny.
So I got a little nervous because I wasn't sure
if I knew the tax. I thought maybe the tax
I was off on the tax. The total, Danny, the
total on the showcase showdown three king size pretzels. Remember,
I only had twenty dollars to spend. If I go over,
(13:48):
I got to pay the difference. If I go under,
they get the money. My total with tax nineteen dollars
and sixty eight cents, I was only thirty two cents
away from the perfect twenty dollars, but I'll take that
thirty two cents. You're gonna win the showcase showdown at
(14:12):
thirty two cents away most of the time.
Speaker 4 (14:13):
Wow, what did you do with three pretzels?
Speaker 1 (14:16):
Though, well, here's the here's the cheap code. I went
back to the press box and I went to where
the table. I sat next to Fernando at he wasn't there.
There were some other people there, so I put the
pretzels down and I walked over and they had some
Dodger dogs, and they had like chili, and they had
cheese for the Dodger dogs as topics. I then took
(14:39):
a cup and got but I felt like I was
robbing a bank. A cup of cheese, nacho cheese that
was for the Dodger dogs. That is a two twenty
five value. I then got two of them. So now
I'm at four point fifty in bol this money. So
(15:02):
I'm ahead Danny my head by over four dollars.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
You are ruthless.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I am sticking it to the man. Okay, I am
sticking it to rob Man for the Major League Baseball.
So anyway, that was It's not trigonometry, and I'm very
proud that I was able to do now as far
as eating the pretzels. I ate two pretzels and then
I got immediately tired. I could not eat the third one.
But what I did is I waited, and they had
a microwave em and I put the third one in
(15:33):
a microwave and I warmed it up for twenty five seconds.
I nuked it and it came back to life. And
so then I ate the third one a little bit later.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
Got your second wind.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
I did. I did get my my second win. But
I felt like I was very efficient. It took a
long time, but I came within thirty two cents of
a perfect score.
Speaker 4 (15:52):
And then that he knows that nothing like a good
soft pretzel light least salted, dipped in nacho cheese. Agree,
especially when that nacho cheese is hot. Yeah, oh man,
that is. I had that at the Canelo fight. Best
meal I had in Vegas that entire weekend, and we
(16:12):
went to a stinking steakhouse.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
So good, yeah, so so wonderful.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
I agree.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
And I'm looking at these other people, like my friends
in the media, and they're spending like twelve dollars for
something and then they're giving eight dollars. What are you
giving back eight bucks? What are you a loser throwing
a couple of cheese cups? At least so at least
you're you're getting closer. That's a ripple.
Speaker 4 (16:36):
Yeah, get a side of ranch or something.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Yeah, maybe you can put a gun rack or something
like that. I don't know, you can mess around with that, right.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
I don't know how to transition from your funny story
to this story, which is slightly serious.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
But it is. Yeah, it's but it's one of those.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
I'm gonna put my grown up hat on. I'm gonna
be my I'm not gonna be goofy, goofy guy. All yeah, Okay,
I'll be very mature here. All right.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
Well, I mean it's funny what the kid said, but
it's just through the eyes of a youngster, the damn
things that kids say. Right, Yeah, So I haven't gotten
to tell a story about the school campus in a
little while.
Speaker 4 (17:17):
I'm in there. Thursday morning, I open up the campus.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
I'm in my classroom and there's a kid, let's see,
I'll change his name to protect the innocent and the guilty,
so let's call him Joseph. All right, Joseph walks in.
I check him in for the early morning program. He's
sitting there, he's doing some math homework. He's telling me
all about algebra and how hard it is, and he's like,
(17:42):
when am I going to use this in real life?
And I said, heah, you're telling me, kid, I had
to take algebra as well and suffer through it. He's
talking about algebra and everything, and then he tells me,
have you heard about what's going on with Israel and everything?
He said, my dad told me I am not allowed
to go to school on Friday because of the threats.
(18:05):
He said, I need to stay home right next to
the gun rack.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
What how old is the kid?
Speaker 4 (18:14):
He's an eighth grader.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Wow, Now, Ben, A lot of people have this opinion
of California that we are all anti guns, and you know,
we're all a bunch of hippies here next to the ocean.
Yeah No, there are a bunch of gun lovers that
we all know here where we live.
Speaker 4 (18:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Yeah. I got a bunch of friends that are like
drive trucks and have shotgun racks.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
And we have that crowd here as well mixed in.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
And I just got a kick out of it, because
I mean, I didn't know what to say how many
guns do you have at your house? And I was like,
this took a turn from algebra to gun talk.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Through the eyes of the I actually had. And this
is enough yet again, Danny, you are facilitating marginal conversation.
But you're see, I'm so muddled, I'm forgettingthing. So the
other day, this is actually you'll get a kick out
of this. And it's not a long story. It's just
like an antidote to your story, because it's about a kid.
So I went to Target to I had to pick
(19:26):
up something at Target. So I'm walking and it was
in the grocery store part of Target, right, So I
went to Target. I usually don't go.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
I like a.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Costco and I'm not a Target guy with my wife
likes to. But I had to get some So I
go into Target and I'm looking for the item I need.
It's a food item, and I'm walking through the grocery
store and this woman's she's pushing a cart with her son.
And I'm not sure how old the kid is, maybe
like six or seven. I'm not really good at all
(19:58):
with ages. And then she's got her daughter with her
and they're walking through the store and they walked past
me on the aisle and I'm looking for the thing,
and this little kid, in this little cute voice says,
oh my god, Becky, look at her butt. And he's
(20:18):
like he keeps saying. He says it like four or
five times in this cute little boy voice, right, and
he's he's singing. I guess he had heard for the
first time the sir mix a lot baby Baby got
back and he kept repeating that, and the mom is like,
you know, she's like totally embarrassed, and she's like freaking out.
(20:39):
She's like, you can't say that, you know. It was
so funny though. You had this cute little kid voice
because he was a little kid and he's, oh my god, Becky,
look at her butt, and it was hilarious. It was
so it was so funny. I was like, it was
laughing and and you get to experience that, Danny soon
enough with Coha get wait a little bit, but soon enough,
(21:01):
you'll be able to experience that.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
He watched the Raiders game with me again last weekend
last Monday night, and he heard a lot of f
bombs as the Raiders were in the red zone. They
did score two touchdowns two of the three times so
there were probably a few less f bombs than the
week prior. But yeah, I'm a little scared that his
first word is going to be ye by blank and blank.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
You he's learning by osmosis. He's learning by osmosis. So
the flyover thing, let's get that real quick. So on Saturday,
this actually kind of relates to Cole because I at
Game one Dodgers and Diamondbacks last Saturday week ago. So
I'm at the game, but I really was there because
I had to pick up my pass. But it was
(21:49):
my day off, and you know, I was planning on
watching the game on TV. But I went there and
I was just schmoozing. I was, I was hanging out
with people cod you know, just chatting whatever. So I'm
doing that and then I believe you had sent me
a message, Danny. You were like, hey, you know, I'm
(22:12):
gonna kind of be in the area you're at, you know,
in the north Woods area, so maybe we can hang out.
You can meet CoA. So I was like, oh, that's cool.
I want to meet Cole. I've not met CoA. I'd
like to meet the little guy. I've heard a lot
about him, and he's new to the world, so I'd
like to welcome him into the world and all that.
So I thought that would be cool, and I felt
that was much more important than watching Clayton Kershaw go
out and barf on the mount. So I had this
(22:34):
all planned out. Now, I did have to schmooze with
some of the corporate muckety MUCKs. But on my way out,
I walked down the hill. I was watching the Dodger
pregame stuff. The game was about to start, so I'm
watching the game coverage on my phone as I'm walking
down the hills around Dodger Stadium. Because the I am
(22:56):
so low, I'm such a little man for the Dodgers
meeting people, they put me in a lot literally outside
the stadium. So if you're not familiar with the geography
of La or Dodger Stadium, Dodger Stadium is surrounded by
my it seems like miles of parking lots. And then
there's even parking lots outside the stadium that are only
(23:17):
used for playoff games, and this was a playoff. So
I'm walking down from the stadium down the hill through
the main gate on Vin Scully Way.
Speaker 4 (23:28):
There.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
I'm walking down and I have to get to a
lot fourteen. Do you know where a lot fourteen is? Dan,
Are you familiar with a lot fourteen?
Speaker 4 (23:36):
I am familiar with that.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Yeah, okay. So I go down the hill. I then
I turn the corner. There are three people who are
trying to get me to buy a bacon wrapped hot dog.
They are tapping. They do the you know how to
do the tap thing, Danny when they want to get
their attention.
Speaker 4 (23:56):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, So they're all tapping because they see me, like, well,
this guy's a fat ass, he'll probably buy all my
hot talks. So I just kept looking at my phone.
I was walking. I had to kind of jump around.
It was an obstacle course because you know those rent
of scooters. Yeah, yeah, a bunch of people. I just thought,
we'll save money I'm parking. I'll park somewhere far away.
(24:20):
I'll use one of these scooters and then I'll get
up to the top of the hill at Dodger Stadium
and I'll just walk up the rest of the way.
So there was a bunch of scooters right down where
I was walking. So I turned the corner. I then
make a left turn. I make a left turn. I
walked down a little bit further there's the LA Fire
Department Training Center YEP, which is right where a Lot
(24:40):
fourteen is. This is where Will Ferrell film Semipro. Did
you know that. I think we've talked about that before.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
I think we talked about we have. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
The Flint Tropics Arena is actually right near Dodger Stadium,
behind a fire training facility, where, by the way, there
are pieces of the World Trade Center from nine to
eleven that are there as a memorial to the tragic
events on September eleventh, many many years back, and so
those are there as well. An whatever, I get to
(25:08):
the As I'm getting in my car, I hear this
loud noise off in the distance, and I'm like, what
what is that. It's getting getting closer, it's getting louder,
and then I'm feeling we're under siege. And there were
not one, but two F thirty five fighter jets from
the Black Nights of Marine Fighter Attack Squadron, that Squadron
(25:33):
three fourteen, by the way, Dan, if you're keeping score,
stationed at the Marine Corps air Station Miramar, that performed
a flyover. It was a flyover, but this is something
that I did not realize happens during a military flyout.
So I'm in the parking lot, surrounded by thousands of cars,
(25:54):
trying to find the malamobile, and I look up and
I see two F thirty five jets flying over, making
a tremendous amount of noise. And then I am given
a symphony. I am given a medley of what sounded like.
And I didn't count them, but it sounded like hundreds
hundreds of car al arms. It was at least one
(26:17):
hundred that simultaneously went off. They were triggered by the
two F thirty five fighter jets from the Black Knights
of Marine Fighter Attack Squadron three to fourteen station at
Marine Corps Air Station Mira mar performed the flyover and
they I didn't realize this thing happened. I didn't know
what happened like that.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
They had no idea, No I saw it on TV.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
The last thing that came to my mind is, oh,
wonder what happens to all those thousands of park cars.
Speaker 1 (26:46):
Yeah, it blew me away. And there was this old
guy that was sitting there kind of as a parking
lot of tenant, and he was just shaking his head,
you know, he was just he's probably seen that one
hundred times, but I hadn't seen it before, and I
was like, this is nuts. This is crazy. A lot
of the newer cars because if like the Tesla's and
cars like that, if anything, they have such such high sensors,
(27:09):
uh such, Yeah, it's I don't know what the right
term is, but anyway, they have the thing of a
jigs and they start going going off the car alarms.
Speaker 4 (27:19):
Some soft ass sissy cars.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yeah, those California, the People's Republic at California. My good.
But it was wonderful to meet Cole. It was so cool.
And I gotta tell you, no offense to your wife.
Speaker 4 (27:30):
Danny.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Look, guy, he's your doppelganger. He is. I can see
the Dandy G. He's got the Danny G looks he's
got the matinee idol looks there from Danny, he does.
Speaker 4 (27:42):
The microphone throttler.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
Man, he's a handsome little sucker.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
So he didn't come out looking like an alien, which
is amazing. Talked about that on the podcast back when
she was pregnant, that a lot of babies come out
looking like an alien and then maybe later down the
lot and they get some good looks or they start
out really really good looking and then they might turn.
Speaker 4 (28:08):
Let's hope that he stays handsome.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
Yeah, I know, I looking kid, And I was blown
away because it was was I love with little kids,
and I haven't seen too many little kids recently, but
when I got to hold them a little bit. But
when my I think it was my wife was holding
him and then I put my finger out and he
kind of grabbed a hold of my finger and he
had like all his whole hand was wrapped around my finger.
And I was like, oh my god, I can't believe
(28:33):
we all start out like that. That's insane to me.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
That's just it was really cool. He was holding your
pointer finger like it was a microphone.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was. It was really neat. It
was It was great seeing him, and I'm glad he
woke up because he was kind of like sleepy, right,
he was kind of sleep was past his bedtime.
Speaker 3 (28:49):
Yeah, it was later in the evening and so he
was about a half hour past bedtime.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Wake me up before you go go. Yeah, So so
that was pretty That was pretty cool. Foody fun. Well,
we'll do a couple foody stories because we all got
to eat this actually done pretty well, Danny. People seem
to like this crap, so we'll.
Speaker 4 (29:10):
Keep doing it.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Let's see here, well, Raising Canes. You see this out
of Dallas. I wonder if this came up on Covido
and Rich Raising Canes has yet again teamed up with
post Malone. They opened up their first ever Dallas cowboy
themed Raising Canes incahoots with post Malone. This thing looks
actually really cool. So I guess if I end up
(29:34):
in Dallas visiting one of my friends that live in
the Dallas area, I'll have to go to this Raisin Canes.
But they have the giant star logo, the drive through,
you drive through the star logo.
Speaker 4 (29:45):
That's cool. Now.
Speaker 3 (29:45):
I wonder if that'll start a trend to where they
personalize each city's team.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
They should. It's a great idea. It's a wonderful idea.
And I'll actually send you this you can see what
it looks like because it's to me, it kind of
looked a little bit when I first saw it, I
didn't know it was the cowboys thing. It kind of
looked to me like maybe it was a Carls junior
off the side, like, well, why would they it says Canes,
So it wouldn't be a Carl's Jr. But I'll send
(30:14):
you the photo here and you can see if you
click on that, you can see the drive through you
drive through the star, which is the Cowboys logo. There's
a bunch of other photos here. It's in Cahoot's post Malone.
I guess designed it or something like that. I bet
he probably just had somebody else to sign it.
Speaker 4 (30:34):
This is cool. I like this now.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
The only problem is when you go to take a
bite of your chicken finger, do you get demolished by
Fred Warner?
Speaker 2 (30:44):
Hell?
Speaker 1 (30:47):
Well, no, no, no. The food is wonderful there at
the Dallas Cowboys raising Canes, but if you take a
date there you might choke like Dak Prescott. Hey, we'll
be here until Thursday, lame jokes. On Friday. That's yesterday,
not today. Today is Saturday, so don't worry about that. Well,
(31:08):
this is always important with fast food restaurants. They're so
concerned about what are the kids like? Right? What are
the kids like? Because if you eat fast food as
a kid, you're likely going to eat that when you're
forty five or fifty years old because it brings you
back to what you remember. And according to a semi
annual Taking Stock with Teens survey, the two fast food
(31:32):
restaurants that have gained traction with the kiddies with the
teeny boppers and they are what they are, McDonald's which
gained three percent and Raising Canes, the aforementioned Raising Canes,
which is now in the top five for the kids.
Speaker 4 (31:52):
That's our daughter wasn't a fan of it the first
time we brought her, but then the second time she
went there, she kind of took a liking to it,
and now she requests it. So it's a slow burn
on the little ones. It seems like, yeah, I love it.
It's I don't need a lot of fast food canes.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
That's probably it. I don't need a lot, period. And
the story here that goes into the detail and it
really it's perfect. This is from the Nation's Restaurant News.
I don't even know what the hell that is, but
that's where I.
Speaker 4 (32:22):
Got the story.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
So they they in the story they talked about the
Wayne Gretzky, the famous one of the famous Wayne Gretzky quotes,
and they say it applies to the quick service fast
food restaurant business because the Gretzky quote was to skate
to where the puck is going to be, not where
it has been. And that's the theory. Right, you get
as I said, you get the gen Z and Jen Alpha.
(32:46):
I guess that's the other is that the youngest generation
Jen Alpha?
Speaker 4 (32:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (32:51):
Yeah, so you get those Jen Alpha kids hooked on
on your product, and then as they age, they then
continue to eat there, and then they get their kids.
It's like you and CoA, right, your what's your favorite
fast food place, Danny? What's your go to?
Speaker 4 (33:08):
I would say probably Wendy's.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
Wendy's. So chances are when Coa's you know, not not
eating the baby food from the mom and all on
the formula and all that, Cola's gonna end up like
with you, You'll take them to Wendy's, right, get them
like chicken nuggets.
Speaker 4 (33:25):
Yeah, he'll get a Dave's double and a baked potato.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
There you go, there you go? Uh, this is foody fun?
How about this? This is odd to me. I don't
know how I feel about this, Danny, because I always
believe you got to stay in your lane. A story
that Taco Bell, Taco Bell is trying out chicken nuggets. No, yep,
they are tests running. They're doing a test run in Minneapolis.
(33:52):
So those of you, you know who you are that
live in the Twin Cities, they are they're they're focused
on more chicken chicken and they're like, hey, we can
serve crispy chicken nuggets. So they're testing those out in
the mini apples market.
Speaker 4 (34:09):
How about make them soft because most places make the
mistake of overfrying their nuggets.
Speaker 1 (34:16):
Well that's because many of the people that work at
the fast food restaurants just kind of what they're like robots,
you know what I'm saying. They do it as quickly
as possible. But the nuggets are available in two sizes
nanty five piece with one sauce three to four ninety
nine depending on location. Ten piece, Oh my god, a
six ninety nine to eight ninety nine.
Speaker 4 (34:37):
Not a deal.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
That's not a deal at all. Right, that's a terrible thing.
Now is this the deal? I mean, I don't know Arby's. Now,
you've talked about Arby's on the show. You famously went
to Arby's and talked about that with your family.
Speaker 3 (34:52):
I did a test run there and then a week
later that same Rby shut down.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
The Health Department shut it down, right. Yeah, So Arby's
is now offering thirty boneless wings for seventeen dollars. Is
that a good deal?
Speaker 3 (35:10):
This is not even real. I don't even know anybody
who eats at Arby's. Again, I think it's a front
for a drug operation.
Speaker 1 (35:18):
You might be right. I told you last time we
talked about Arby's. When I lived in Hollywood, there was
an Arby's on Sunset. He's a Sunset or Hollywood, I
think it was Sunset, and it was like an old
school Arby's. And sometimes would I would go there to
get the Big Montana, which is a roast beef, but
no beef was harmed in the making of the Big Montana,
(35:38):
and I would go there for that, but very rarely,
very rarely did I go to.
Speaker 4 (35:44):
The I'm pretty sure it's a money laundering operation.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
And you know, you might be right. That's a hot take.
You might be right. Burger King, We'll get out on this.
So Burger King is unveiling a new proto type a
cool burger King called Sizzle. What they're testing this in Miami,
which I believe is where Burger King is headquartered. And
(36:09):
so they're trying to trying to futs around with that
and get that, get that going. I looked at it,
it just looks like a designer, high end Burger King.
Speaker 3 (36:18):
Lame has any fast food restaurant falling off harder from
when we were kids until now than Burger King.
Speaker 4 (36:27):
Back when we were kids.
Speaker 1 (36:29):
The wopera, Oh yeah, the flame grilled, the flame broiled.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Flame broiled, that flame broiled burger. When we were kids,
it was really good. The bun was good, the quality
was awesome. And then they changed owners a couple of times,
I think, and the quality now is crud. It is crap.
I've tried to eat it and it stays in your
stomach like a rock. It doesn't taste very good. The
(36:55):
fries went to shit. It just went downhill. And it's
sad because we have good memories of eating there as kids.
Speaker 4 (37:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Yeah, I used to go there with my grandfather. My
grandfather loved it, and he would go there and tell
the person he liked his food well done, like I do.
And he would tell the person put the whopper through
the flame broiler twice so he'd have a twice cook
the whopper. And I was the line. I was going
to use Danny at is because Burger King's futsing around
(37:23):
with this the sizzle concept. The problem with that it
looks really good. The problem is when you get the food.
That's the problem. Like the restaurant looks good, but the
other thing. At least they have onion rings at Burger Kings,
so that's a positive because it's hard to get rings
a lot of places. McDonald's doesn't have onion rings. I
don't believe Wendy's has onion rings. So that is a
(37:47):
a good thing. It is Saturday, Danny, what yet going
on today? We got college football? We're checking that out.
Some of the big matchups on the collegiate football schedule
this day. And what else.
Speaker 4 (37:59):
You got going on? Anything going on besides working on
this podcast.
Speaker 3 (38:02):
It is going to be a day of rest, a
little bit of college football, and just hanging out with CoA, hanging.
Speaker 1 (38:08):
Out with the little fella, hanging out. What's is the
biggest game Washington, Oregon? Is that the biggest game today.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
For us out here closest to the Pacific Northwest.
Speaker 1 (38:19):
That's a big game. We'll see, we'll see what happened
that's in Seattle, I believe I think that game is in.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
Where is Caleb Williams playing today?
Speaker 1 (38:29):
Oh though, Oh that's a big game too, es he's
playing Notre Dame.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
Yes, that's going to be a good one.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
And did you see the funny video of the punt
returner for SC this week at practice? It's supposed to
be rainy and.
Speaker 4 (38:45):
I did see that.
Speaker 1 (38:46):
Yeah, spraying water on this guy, Like that's gonna work.
It's so stupid, Like, I don't they will just spray water.
I'm not getting ready for you know, when it's raining
in Indiana and you know, Dob, it's like, oh boy. Anyway,
all right, have a great Saturday. We've got the mail
(39:06):
bag and Pop goes the Culture and we'll get to
that on the Sunday podcast. We'll talk to you and
watch Penny versus the Penny. We'll talk to you
Speaker 4 (39:15):
Then Asta pasta viopulation
Kabbooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to the Clearinghouse
of hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth
(00:23):
Hour with Ben Mahller starts right now.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
In the air every way. It's the Fifth Hour with
Ben Mahler and Danny g Radio. And we know that
there are eight gazillion podcasts, but we do thank you
for listening to this podcast and not some other crappy podcasts.
(00:49):
So we do thank you for that, Dany Gye. It
is Saturday, a glorious day here, a great opportunity to
enjoy collegiate football and bet On college football and all that,
and also watch Benny Versus the Penny, which is airing
all over the place. And so we've got a lot
(01:09):
a lot going on here. Dan, There's a lot of
things going on.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
And I feel like you and some other listeners who
have gambled for a long time, because I have the
itch now I wish I was in Vegas, not just
for the Raiders and Patriots, but so that I could
go to one of the kiosks and make some NFL bets.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Well, eventually in California you'll be able to bet. That's
when it gets dangerous, right when you can just bet
and all that stuff. And the other thing too, about
the whole gambling. My buddies in Vegas, they don't even
go to the casino kiosk. They just do it on
their phone. Yeah, it's like and they bet on they
bet on games in Uh, this actually inspired. You just
(01:53):
inspired a story. You just inspired, You just facilitated, Danny
g a story that I was told this past week
actually about in game betting. Okay, so you know in
game betting. He was not a self explanatory. If you're
not a gambler, maybe you don't know. But you can
literally bet on like everything that happens. You can bet
(02:15):
on whether the next pitch is going to be a
strike or a ball. You can like, there's endless possibilities
of what you bet. I bring that up because a
friend of mine, who I will not name because he
works for corporate Major League Baseball, but I've known this
guy for a long time. And he was showing me
around before the Dodger Diamondback playoff game, and he took
(02:37):
me into a booth that I had never been in,
and he explained, I said, well, that's where I sit,
and there's a couple other people and and you know,
like and then there's this person over here off to
the side, and their job. Their job is to relay
(02:59):
what's going on on back to the bookmakers and what happened.
And this is what we talk about a great job
because they had this in game betting, but with the
delay to get a TV broadcast to the satellite, up
to the satellite and back down, or even if it's online,
there's a delay, right, there's some lag time.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
I was going to ask you this very question.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
Yeah, So what they have done to circumvent to cut
off those, let's say, I don't know, unethical or gamesmanship
type fans. I guess they were concerned about people having
somebody at the game relaying, hey, this pitch is a strike,
quickly bet it's going to be a strike, and then
(03:44):
just bankrupting the casino. They're not in the business of
losing money. So Major League Baseball employees someone to relay
in real time on the phone and the internet, real
time what's going on. So their only job is every
(04:05):
pitch or if it's a foul ball, where does it go?
Or all that that is their that's their gig to
be ahead of the TV broadcast.
Speaker 4 (04:13):
That is a cool job.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yeah. And I was told that every sport has someone
because gambling is so popular now, every professional sport that
you can bet on, which is all of them, the
NFL has it, the NHL, NBA, they all employ someone
in house in the arena at these games to make
sure there's no funny business and nothing gets pickled, as
(04:37):
Alf the Alien opineer would say. And so I thought,
I thought that was interesting. I was not planning on
telling that story, but you just you mentioned the kiosk
of the gambling, and that popped in my head randomly.
So there you go. On this podcast we have it's
not trigonometry, it's not trigonometry to the gun rack. I
(04:58):
believe that's also on this podcast, A fly I over
footy fun And I think, well, I think we'll save
other stuff that we were going to do yesterday to
the Mailbag podcast on Sunday, so we'll have some pop
culture on a Sunday, but today is Saturday, and we'll
start with this back to the Tales of the Life
of Mahler and Danny g So another story related about
(05:20):
Dodger Stadium. Yesterday we talked about how randomly Fernando Valezuela
happened to sit down at a table I was sitting
at to eat some spaghetti, which which was interesting and random.
And I would like to point out that's that's in
my top five random people to sit down at my
table in the Other ones on that list include Tommy Heinzen,
(05:43):
the late Celtics broadcaster on Celtics legend who happened to
sit down at my table randomly, Billy Crystal at a
at a Clipper game. He's on that short list of
people that sat down there, John Cena years ago at
a Laker game, and there's a couple others that. Anyway,
(06:03):
I sound like Pat O'Brien dropping it. So I had
to use some mall of math. Now, you know, I
use Malard math on the radar. I love Malon math.
I use malarmth all the time. Malamoth is great. I'm
not a numbers guy, but that doesn't seem to add up. Yeah,
so headline Los Angeles one thousand, Vin Scully Way Media
Freeloaders update mentioned things a little different in the playoffs
(06:28):
Baseball playoffs. So they provide snacks for the media freeloaders
for free. That means you can get like a bag
of Cheetos or a candy bar or something like that
for free. But there is no hot lunch. They don't
serve a hot lunch. They used to serve like a
box lunch. But baseball there's so many media people, I mean,
(06:51):
it's like a beehive in there, so many media people
that they stopped doing that a couple of years ago.
So what they do is they give you the working
media in air quotes a meal voucher. It's like weed
man hippie in Miami gets food stamps. The media gets
a voucher. And so you used to get this lunch,
(07:12):
this box lunch. They don't do that anymore. So they
hand out this meal ticket. Now the meal ticket is
good for twenty dollars. That's it, no more, no less.
So it seems like a lot of money, right, twenty
bucks whatever, But you got to read the fine print.
Can't buy alcohol with it. You know, there's just like
there's restrictions on food stamps. You can't buy alcohol with it.
You can, you have to use it at the concession
(07:33):
stands in the ballpark. And so it's kind of self explanatory.
But you have twenty dollars to spend, and you you
have to spend it all. If you go over the
twenty dollars. If the item you're ordering, let's say it's
like twenty five dollars, you've got to pay five dollars.
You've got to pay the difference. Now, should you go under,
(07:55):
should you buy something that is not twenty dollars, they
don't give you change, You don't get the pocket the difference.
That money goes back to them. You leave money on
the table.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
Can you use this card more than once?
Speaker 1 (08:11):
No, that thing you can only use it once. I
am such a radio loser. I'm a man on a mission.
I was methodical. I was neurotic about this, Danny, Okay,
So I'm like, you know, I don't want to leave
money on the table.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
I I You're like a price is right contestant trying
to get to nineteen dollars and ninety nine.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
Cents exactly exactly. So I'm out there. I got my
calculator at I'm crunching the numbers, right, I'm circumventing Dodger Stadium,
the concession stands there. I'm going going around crunching all
the stats and it's not trigonometry, but it's pretty close.
So I didn't realize, because you know, I don't hang
(08:58):
out with the unwashed just I knew the prices were
outrageous at Dodger Stadium, but I did not realize the
levels they go to gouge the hardcore Dodger fans that
go out to the ballpark. I was blown away. I
guess the Putin price hack. I didn't realize it had
gone to that level. I remember you told the famous
story about Opening Day. Was that last year, Danny or
(09:19):
this year.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
Two seasons ago?
Speaker 3 (09:22):
I believe in it was Opening Night where we spent
almost one thousand dollars for our family to.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Go thousand bucks to go to a freaking baseball game. Anyway,
Oh my god. So I'm walking around, I'm like, well,
what do I want to eat? That's the first thing,
But what's in my budget? So I saw, well, there's
a beef nacho helmet that looks kind of good, but
that's twenty. That's twenty dollars and fifty cents. I don't
(09:47):
want to have to pop. I don't have to spend
fifty cents. Then I saw there's a cheese steak stand
at dig Your.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Goal really was to not go over twenty, not even
by a quarter exactly.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
No, I'm I'm not kidding, Danny.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
I was.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
I was dissecting this. I was like, I was like, well,
then I looked at this, this giant cheese steak that
was twenty five bucks, twenty four to ninety nine for
a giant cheese steak.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
Oh, so you're not spending five dollars of your own money.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
No chance. So then my friend Steve Futterman, who used
to work at CBS, the great news reporter, Steve Futterman,
who I've known for years. So Futterman's there and he's like, hey,
I want to go get some food. I'm gonna go
get a pizza. So he went to the California Pizza
Kitchen at Dodger Stadium where they have the barbecue chicken pizza.
(10:35):
You can get that for sixteen dollars and fifty cents
plus tax. But I did the math on that, and
I would have been leaving like a dollar and some
change on the on the on the MLB's dime, I
would have been giving back some money. I was like, well,
I can't do that. So then I saw they had
cotton candy, but it was five fifty and I don't
(10:56):
like cotton candy anyway, I'm not nine years old. So
it was five point fifty for sugar that is spun
five fifty for that. I couldn't get past that. So
then I'm like, all right, well, what about a bag
of peanuts. That can't be that much seven bucks for
a bag of peanuts. So I was like, okay, I
could do I could do two bags of peanuts, but
(11:17):
I can't do three because three would go over. So
I can only do two bags of peanuts. That's it.
So I'm scrutinizing this. And then it got to the
point where I was like, well, maybe if I I
was so desperate to get exactly twenty dollars that they
had a pickle for four ninety nine, so I thought
I could get four. I don't even like pickles. I
hate pickles. Alfie alien O Piner likes pickles. I don't
(11:39):
like pickles. So but I was like, well, wait a minute,
fir for a moment, Danny in my head, I'm like, okay,
I can get four pickles, that's twenty bucks. But then
they add the tax, so the tax would have bumped
me over the twenty dollars. So I can't do that.
So I'm moving around right, I'm bobbing and weaving like
I do on benny versus a penny, and I'm breaking
things down. I'm analyzed everything and I'm getting into it.
(12:03):
I'm very surgical, very surgical when i'm doing this, and
you know i'm doing my thing. I'm using precision. So
then I realized, you know what I really like, but
I haven't had in a while a soft pretzel. So
then I was like, how much is a soft pretzel?
And there it was, the King sized soft pretzel. Hey
(12:25):
you Jesus, five ninety nine, five ninety nine.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
What about the melted nacho cheese?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Well, I could not afford that. That was out of
my budget. They were charging this blew me away. I
thought this was the most outrageously, most offensive thing I
could comprehend or I witnessed at Dodger Stadium two twenty
five for a cup of nacho cheese Dawn. Now two
twenty five that's a side item twenty five for a
(12:57):
little small cup.
Speaker 4 (12:58):
That's a seventy five per cent them. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
So what I did, Danny, is I realized I have
I have a hack that I can get the cheese cup.
I can circumvent the two twenty five for the cheese cup,
but I need the pretzels, and there's no way to
get the pretzels other than the here. So I made
an executive decision, and I punched the numbers into my
calculator using Malormath. I purchased three five ninety nine king
(13:28):
size soft pretzels at Dodger Stadium. They added the tax, Danny.
So I got a little nervous because I wasn't sure
if I knew the tax. I thought maybe the tax
I was off on the tax. The total, Danny, the
total on the showcase showdown three king size pretzels. Remember,
I only had twenty dollars to spend. If I go over,
(13:48):
I got to pay the difference. If I go under,
they get the money. My total with tax nineteen dollars
and sixty eight cents, I was only thirty two cents
away from the perfect twenty dollars, but I'll take that
thirty two cents. You're gonna win the showcase showdown at
(14:12):
thirty two cents away most of the time.
Speaker 4 (14:13):
Wow, what did you do with three pretzels?
Speaker 1 (14:16):
Though, well, here's the here's the cheap code. I went
back to the press box and I went to where
the table. I sat next to Fernando at he wasn't there.
There were some other people there, so I put the
pretzels down and I walked over and they had some
Dodger dogs, and they had like chili, and they had
cheese for the Dodger dogs as topics. I then took
(14:39):
a cup and got but I felt like I was
robbing a bank. A cup of cheese, nacho cheese that
was for the Dodger dogs. That is a two twenty
five value. I then got two of them. So now
I'm at four point fifty in bol this money. So
(15:02):
I'm ahead Danny my head by over four dollars.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
You are ruthless.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I am sticking it to the man. Okay, I am
sticking it to rob Man for the Major League Baseball.
So anyway, that was It's not trigonometry, and I'm very
proud that I was able to do now as far
as eating the pretzels. I ate two pretzels and then
I got immediately tired. I could not eat the third one.
But what I did is I waited, and they had
a microwave em and I put the third one in
(15:33):
a microwave and I warmed it up for twenty five seconds.
I nuked it and it came back to life. And
so then I ate the third one a little bit later.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
Got your second wind.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
I did. I did get my my second win. But
I felt like I was very efficient. It took a
long time, but I came within thirty two cents of
a perfect score.
Speaker 4 (15:52):
And then that he knows that nothing like a good
soft pretzel light least salted, dipped in nacho cheese. Agree,
especially when that nacho cheese is hot. Yeah, oh man,
that is. I had that at the Canelo fight. Best
meal I had in Vegas that entire weekend, and we
(16:12):
went to a stinking steakhouse.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
So good, yeah, so so wonderful.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
I agree.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
And I'm looking at these other people, like my friends
in the media, and they're spending like twelve dollars for
something and then they're giving eight dollars. What are you
giving back eight bucks? What are you a loser throwing
a couple of cheese cups? At least so at least
you're you're getting closer. That's a ripple.
Speaker 4 (16:36):
Yeah, get a side of ranch or something.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Yeah, maybe you can put a gun rack or something
like that. I don't know, you can mess around with that, right.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
I don't know how to transition from your funny story
to this story, which is slightly serious.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
But it is. Yeah, it's but it's one of those.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
I'm gonna put my grown up hat on. I'm gonna
be my I'm not gonna be goofy, goofy guy. All yeah, Okay,
I'll be very mature here. All right.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
Well, I mean it's funny what the kid said, but
it's just through the eyes of a youngster, the damn
things that kids say. Right, Yeah, So I haven't gotten
to tell a story about the school campus in a
little while.
Speaker 4 (17:17):
I'm in there. Thursday morning, I open up the campus.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
I'm in my classroom and there's a kid, let's see,
I'll change his name to protect the innocent and the guilty,
so let's call him Joseph. All right, Joseph walks in.
I check him in for the early morning program. He's
sitting there, he's doing some math homework. He's telling me
all about algebra and how hard it is, and he's like,
(17:42):
when am I going to use this in real life?
And I said, heah, you're telling me, kid, I had
to take algebra as well and suffer through it. He's
talking about algebra and everything, and then he tells me,
have you heard about what's going on with Israel and everything?
He said, my dad told me I am not allowed
to go to school on Friday because of the threats.
(18:05):
He said, I need to stay home right next to
the gun rack.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
What how old is the kid?
Speaker 4 (18:14):
He's an eighth grader.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Wow, Now, Ben, A lot of people have this opinion
of California that we are all anti guns, and you know,
we're all a bunch of hippies here next to the ocean.
Yeah No, there are a bunch of gun lovers that
we all know here where we live.
Speaker 4 (18:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Yeah. I got a bunch of friends that are like
drive trucks and have shotgun racks.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
And we have that crowd here as well mixed in.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
And I just got a kick out of it, because
I mean, I didn't know what to say how many
guns do you have at your house? And I was like,
this took a turn from algebra to gun talk.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Through the eyes of the I actually had. And this
is enough yet again, Danny, you are facilitating marginal conversation.
But you're see, I'm so muddled, I'm forgettingthing. So the
other day, this is actually you'll get a kick out
of this. And it's not a long story. It's just
like an antidote to your story, because it's about a kid.
So I went to Target to I had to pick
(19:26):
up something at Target. So I'm walking and it was
in the grocery store part of Target, right, So I
went to Target. I usually don't go.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
I like a.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Costco and I'm not a Target guy with my wife
likes to. But I had to get some So I
go into Target and I'm looking for the item I need.
It's a food item, and I'm walking through the grocery
store and this woman's she's pushing a cart with her son.
And I'm not sure how old the kid is, maybe
like six or seven. I'm not really good at all
(19:58):
with ages. And then she's got her daughter with her
and they're walking through the store and they walked past
me on the aisle and I'm looking for the thing,
and this little kid, in this little cute voice says,
oh my god, Becky, look at her butt. And he's
(20:18):
like he keeps saying. He says it like four or
five times in this cute little boy voice, right, and
he's he's singing. I guess he had heard for the
first time the sir mix a lot baby Baby got
back and he kept repeating that, and the mom is like,
you know, she's like totally embarrassed, and she's like freaking out.
(20:39):
She's like, you can't say that, you know. It was
so funny though. You had this cute little kid voice
because he was a little kid and he's, oh my god, Becky,
look at her butt, and it was hilarious. It was
so it was so funny. I was like, it was
laughing and and you get to experience that, Danny soon
enough with Coha get wait a little bit, but soon enough,
(21:01):
you'll be able to experience that.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
He watched the Raiders game with me again last weekend
last Monday night, and he heard a lot of f
bombs as the Raiders were in the red zone. They
did score two touchdowns two of the three times so
there were probably a few less f bombs than the
week prior. But yeah, I'm a little scared that his
first word is going to be ye by blank and blank.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
You he's learning by osmosis. He's learning by osmosis. So
the flyover thing, let's get that real quick. So on Saturday,
this actually kind of relates to Cole because I at
Game one Dodgers and Diamondbacks last Saturday week ago. So
I'm at the game, but I really was there because
I had to pick up my pass. But it was
(21:49):
my day off, and you know, I was planning on
watching the game on TV. But I went there and
I was just schmoozing. I was, I was hanging out
with people cod you know, just chatting whatever. So I'm
doing that and then I believe you had sent me
a message, Danny. You were like, hey, you know, I'm
(22:12):
gonna kind of be in the area you're at, you know,
in the north Woods area, so maybe we can hang out.
You can meet CoA. So I was like, oh, that's cool.
I want to meet Cole. I've not met CoA. I'd
like to meet the little guy. I've heard a lot
about him, and he's new to the world, so I'd
like to welcome him into the world and all that.
So I thought that would be cool, and I felt
that was much more important than watching Clayton Kershaw go
out and barf on the mount. So I had this
(22:34):
all planned out. Now, I did have to schmooze with
some of the corporate muckety MUCKs. But on my way out,
I walked down the hill. I was watching the Dodger
pregame stuff. The game was about to start, so I'm
watching the game coverage on my phone as I'm walking
down the hills around Dodger Stadium. Because the I am
(22:56):
so low, I'm such a little man for the Dodgers
meeting people, they put me in a lot literally outside
the stadium. So if you're not familiar with the geography
of La or Dodger Stadium, Dodger Stadium is surrounded by
my it seems like miles of parking lots. And then
there's even parking lots outside the stadium that are only
(23:17):
used for playoff games, and this was a playoff. So
I'm walking down from the stadium down the hill through
the main gate on Vin Scully Way.
Speaker 4 (23:28):
There.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
I'm walking down and I have to get to a
lot fourteen. Do you know where a lot fourteen is? Dan,
Are you familiar with a lot fourteen?
Speaker 4 (23:36):
I am familiar with that.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Yeah, okay. So I go down the hill. I then
I turn the corner. There are three people who are
trying to get me to buy a bacon wrapped hot dog.
They are tapping. They do the you know how to
do the tap thing, Danny when they want to get
their attention.
Speaker 4 (23:56):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, So they're all tapping because they see me, like, well,
this guy's a fat ass, he'll probably buy all my
hot talks. So I just kept looking at my phone.
I was walking. I had to kind of jump around.
It was an obstacle course because you know those rent
of scooters. Yeah, yeah, a bunch of people. I just thought,
we'll save money I'm parking. I'll park somewhere far away.
(24:20):
I'll use one of these scooters and then I'll get
up to the top of the hill at Dodger Stadium
and I'll just walk up the rest of the way.
So there was a bunch of scooters right down where
I was walking. So I turned the corner. I then
make a left turn. I make a left turn. I
walked down a little bit further there's the LA Fire
Department Training Center YEP, which is right where a Lot
(24:40):
fourteen is. This is where Will Ferrell film Semipro. Did
you know that. I think we've talked about that before.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
I think we talked about we have. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
The Flint Tropics Arena is actually right near Dodger Stadium,
behind a fire training facility, where, by the way, there
are pieces of the World Trade Center from nine to
eleven that are there as a memorial to the tragic
events on September eleventh, many many years back, and so
those are there as well. An whatever, I get to
(25:08):
the As I'm getting in my car, I hear this
loud noise off in the distance, and I'm like, what
what is that. It's getting getting closer, it's getting louder,
and then I'm feeling we're under siege. And there were
not one, but two F thirty five fighter jets from
the Black Nights of Marine Fighter Attack Squadron, that Squadron
(25:33):
three fourteen, by the way, Dan, if you're keeping score,
stationed at the Marine Corps air Station Miramar, that performed
a flyover. It was a flyover, but this is something
that I did not realize happens during a military flyout.
So I'm in the parking lot, surrounded by thousands of cars,
(25:54):
trying to find the malamobile, and I look up and
I see two F thirty five jets flying over, making
a tremendous amount of noise. And then I am given
a symphony. I am given a medley of what sounded like.
And I didn't count them, but it sounded like hundreds
hundreds of car al arms. It was at least one
(26:17):
hundred that simultaneously went off. They were triggered by the
two F thirty five fighter jets from the Black Knights
of Marine Fighter Attack Squadron three to fourteen station at
Marine Corps Air Station Mira mar performed the flyover and
they I didn't realize this thing happened. I didn't know
what happened like that.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
They had no idea, No I saw it on TV.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
The last thing that came to my mind is, oh,
wonder what happens to all those thousands of park cars.
Speaker 1 (26:46):
Yeah, it blew me away. And there was this old
guy that was sitting there kind of as a parking
lot of tenant, and he was just shaking his head,
you know, he was just he's probably seen that one
hundred times, but I hadn't seen it before, and I
was like, this is nuts. This is crazy. A lot
of the newer cars because if like the Tesla's and
cars like that, if anything, they have such such high sensors,
(27:09):
uh such, Yeah, it's I don't know what the right
term is, but anyway, they have the thing of a
jigs and they start going going off the car alarms.
Speaker 4 (27:19):
Some soft ass sissy cars.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yeah, those California, the People's Republic at California. My good.
But it was wonderful to meet Cole. It was so cool.
And I gotta tell you, no offense to your wife.
Speaker 4 (27:30):
Danny.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Look, guy, he's your doppelganger. He is. I can see
the Dandy G. He's got the Danny G looks he's
got the matinee idol looks there from Danny, he does.
Speaker 4 (27:42):
The microphone throttler.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
Man, he's a handsome little sucker.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
So he didn't come out looking like an alien, which
is amazing. Talked about that on the podcast back when
she was pregnant, that a lot of babies come out
looking like an alien and then maybe later down the
lot and they get some good looks or they start
out really really good looking and then they might turn.
Speaker 4 (28:08):
Let's hope that he stays handsome.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
Yeah, I know, I looking kid, And I was blown
away because it was was I love with little kids,
and I haven't seen too many little kids recently, but
when I got to hold them a little bit. But
when my I think it was my wife was holding
him and then I put my finger out and he
kind of grabbed a hold of my finger and he
had like all his whole hand was wrapped around my finger.
And I was like, oh my god, I can't believe
(28:33):
we all start out like that. That's insane to me.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
That's just it was really cool. He was holding your
pointer finger like it was a microphone.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was. It was really neat. It
was It was great seeing him, and I'm glad he
woke up because he was kind of like sleepy, right,
he was kind of sleep was past his bedtime.
Speaker 3 (28:49):
Yeah, it was later in the evening and so he
was about a half hour past bedtime.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Wake me up before you go go. Yeah, So so
that was pretty That was pretty cool. Foody fun. Well,
we'll do a couple foody stories because we all got
to eat this actually done pretty well, Danny. People seem
to like this crap, so we'll.
Speaker 4 (29:10):
Keep doing it.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Let's see here, well, Raising Canes. You see this out
of Dallas. I wonder if this came up on Covido
and Rich Raising Canes has yet again teamed up with
post Malone. They opened up their first ever Dallas cowboy
themed Raising Canes incahoots with post Malone. This thing looks
actually really cool. So I guess if I end up
(29:34):
in Dallas visiting one of my friends that live in
the Dallas area, I'll have to go to this Raisin Canes.
But they have the giant star logo, the drive through,
you drive through the star logo.
Speaker 4 (29:45):
That's cool. Now.
Speaker 3 (29:45):
I wonder if that'll start a trend to where they
personalize each city's team.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
They should. It's a great idea. It's a wonderful idea.
And I'll actually send you this you can see what
it looks like because it's to me, it kind of
looked a little bit when I first saw it, I
didn't know it was the cowboys thing. It kind of
looked to me like maybe it was a Carls junior
off the side, like, well, why would they it says Canes,
So it wouldn't be a Carl's Jr. But I'll send
(30:14):
you the photo here and you can see if you
click on that, you can see the drive through you
drive through the star, which is the Cowboys logo. There's
a bunch of other photos here. It's in Cahoot's post Malone.
I guess designed it or something like that. I bet
he probably just had somebody else to sign it.
Speaker 4 (30:34):
This is cool. I like this now.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
The only problem is when you go to take a
bite of your chicken finger, do you get demolished by
Fred Warner?
Speaker 2 (30:44):
Hell?
Speaker 1 (30:47):
Well, no, no, no. The food is wonderful there at
the Dallas Cowboys raising Canes, but if you take a
date there you might choke like Dak Prescott. Hey, we'll
be here until Thursday, lame jokes. On Friday. That's yesterday,
not today. Today is Saturday, so don't worry about that. Well,
(31:08):
this is always important with fast food restaurants. They're so
concerned about what are the kids like? Right? What are
the kids like? Because if you eat fast food as
a kid, you're likely going to eat that when you're
forty five or fifty years old because it brings you
back to what you remember. And according to a semi
annual Taking Stock with Teens survey, the two fast food
(31:32):
restaurants that have gained traction with the kiddies with the
teeny boppers and they are what they are, McDonald's which
gained three percent and Raising Canes, the aforementioned Raising Canes,
which is now in the top five for the kids.
Speaker 4 (31:52):
That's our daughter wasn't a fan of it the first
time we brought her, but then the second time she
went there, she kind of took a liking to it,
and now she requests it. So it's a slow burn
on the little ones. It seems like, yeah, I love it.
It's I don't need a lot of fast food canes.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
That's probably it. I don't need a lot, period. And
the story here that goes into the detail and it
really it's perfect. This is from the Nation's Restaurant News.
I don't even know what the hell that is, but
that's where I.
Speaker 4 (32:22):
Got the story.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
So they they in the story they talked about the
Wayne Gretzky, the famous one of the famous Wayne Gretzky quotes,
and they say it applies to the quick service fast
food restaurant business because the Gretzky quote was to skate
to where the puck is going to be, not where
it has been. And that's the theory. Right, you get
as I said, you get the gen Z and Jen Alpha.
(32:46):
I guess that's the other is that the youngest generation
Jen Alpha?
Speaker 4 (32:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (32:51):
Yeah, so you get those Jen Alpha kids hooked on
on your product, and then as they age, they then
continue to eat there, and then they get their kids.
It's like you and CoA, right, your what's your favorite
fast food place, Danny? What's your go to?
Speaker 4 (33:08):
I would say probably Wendy's.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
Wendy's. So chances are when Coa's you know, not not
eating the baby food from the mom and all on
the formula and all that, Cola's gonna end up like
with you, You'll take them to Wendy's, right, get them
like chicken nuggets.
Speaker 4 (33:25):
Yeah, he'll get a Dave's double and a baked potato.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
There you go, there you go? Uh, this is foody fun?
How about this? This is odd to me. I don't
know how I feel about this, Danny, because I always
believe you got to stay in your lane. A story
that Taco Bell, Taco Bell is trying out chicken nuggets. No, yep,
they are tests running. They're doing a test run in Minneapolis.
(33:52):
So those of you, you know who you are that
live in the Twin Cities, they are they're they're focused
on more chicken chicken and they're like, hey, we can
serve crispy chicken nuggets. So they're testing those out in
the mini apples market.
Speaker 4 (34:09):
How about make them soft because most places make the
mistake of overfrying their nuggets.
Speaker 1 (34:16):
Well that's because many of the people that work at
the fast food restaurants just kind of what they're like robots,
you know what I'm saying. They do it as quickly
as possible. But the nuggets are available in two sizes
nanty five piece with one sauce three to four ninety
nine depending on location. Ten piece, Oh my god, a
six ninety nine to eight ninety nine.
Speaker 4 (34:37):
Not a deal.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
That's not a deal at all. Right, that's a terrible thing.
Now is this the deal? I mean, I don't know Arby's. Now,
you've talked about Arby's on the show. You famously went
to Arby's and talked about that with your family.
Speaker 3 (34:52):
I did a test run there and then a week
later that same Rby shut down.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
The Health Department shut it down, right. Yeah, So Arby's
is now offering thirty boneless wings for seventeen dollars. Is
that a good deal?
Speaker 3 (35:10):
This is not even real. I don't even know anybody
who eats at Arby's. Again, I think it's a front
for a drug operation.
Speaker 1 (35:18):
You might be right. I told you last time we
talked about Arby's. When I lived in Hollywood, there was
an Arby's on Sunset. He's a Sunset or Hollywood, I
think it was Sunset, and it was like an old
school Arby's. And sometimes would I would go there to
get the Big Montana, which is a roast beef, but
no beef was harmed in the making of the Big Montana,
(35:38):
and I would go there for that, but very rarely,
very rarely did I go to.
Speaker 4 (35:44):
The I'm pretty sure it's a money laundering operation.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
And you know, you might be right. That's a hot take.
You might be right. Burger King, We'll get out on this.
So Burger King is unveiling a new proto type a
cool burger King called Sizzle. What they're testing this in Miami,
which I believe is where Burger King is headquartered. And
(36:09):
so they're trying to trying to futs around with that
and get that, get that going. I looked at it,
it just looks like a designer, high end Burger King.
Speaker 3 (36:18):
Lame has any fast food restaurant falling off harder from
when we were kids until now than Burger King.
Speaker 4 (36:27):
Back when we were kids.
Speaker 1 (36:29):
The wopera, Oh yeah, the flame grilled, the flame broiled.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Flame broiled, that flame broiled burger. When we were kids,
it was really good. The bun was good, the quality
was awesome. And then they changed owners a couple of times,
I think, and the quality now is crud. It is crap.
I've tried to eat it and it stays in your
stomach like a rock. It doesn't taste very good. The
(36:55):
fries went to shit. It just went downhill. And it's
sad because we have good memories of eating there as kids.
Speaker 4 (37:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Yeah, I used to go there with my grandfather. My
grandfather loved it, and he would go there and tell
the person he liked his food well done, like I do.
And he would tell the person put the whopper through
the flame broiler twice so he'd have a twice cook
the whopper. And I was the line. I was going
to use Danny at is because Burger King's futsing around
(37:23):
with this the sizzle concept. The problem with that it
looks really good. The problem is when you get the food.
That's the problem. Like the restaurant looks good, but the
other thing. At least they have onion rings at Burger Kings,
so that's a positive because it's hard to get rings
a lot of places. McDonald's doesn't have onion rings. I
don't believe Wendy's has onion rings. So that is a
(37:47):
a good thing. It is Saturday, Danny, what yet going
on today? We got college football? We're checking that out.
Some of the big matchups on the collegiate football schedule
this day. And what else.
Speaker 4 (37:59):
You got going on? Anything going on besides working on
this podcast.
Speaker 3 (38:02):
It is going to be a day of rest, a
little bit of college football, and just hanging out with CoA, hanging.
Speaker 1 (38:08):
Out with the little fella, hanging out. What's is the
biggest game Washington, Oregon? Is that the biggest game today.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
For us out here closest to the Pacific Northwest.
Speaker 1 (38:19):
That's a big game. We'll see, we'll see what happened
that's in Seattle, I believe I think that game is in.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
Where is Caleb Williams playing today?
Speaker 1 (38:29):
Oh though, Oh that's a big game too, es he's
playing Notre Dame.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
Yes, that's going to be a good one.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
And did you see the funny video of the punt
returner for SC this week at practice? It's supposed to
be rainy and.
Speaker 4 (38:45):
I did see that.
Speaker 1 (38:46):
Yeah, spraying water on this guy, Like that's gonna work.
It's so stupid, Like, I don't they will just spray water.
I'm not getting ready for you know, when it's raining
in Indiana and you know, Dob, it's like, oh boy. Anyway,
all right, have a great Saturday. We've got the mail
(39:06):
bag and Pop goes the Culture and we'll get to
that on the Sunday podcast. We'll talk to you and
watch Penny versus the Penny. We'll talk to you
Speaker 4 (39:15):
Then Asta pasta viopulation
Host
Ben Maller
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