Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Show weekdays at two a m. Eastern eleven pm Pacific.
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on
Fox Sports Radio and the I Heart Radio Appa Boom.
If you thought more hours a day, minutes a week
(00:20):
was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the
old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads
in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich pill
poppers in the penthouse to clearinghouse of hot takes, break
free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
starts right now in the air everywhere, the sore is underway.
(00:47):
It is a parte even on an Easter Sunday, the
fun Oorama, in this case, the Mallard Orama is underway.
We're hanging out at the Audio Copa cabana here having
a it all time on a Sunday. And the mailbag,
which has become one of the more popular features of
the podcast. Weekend is the mail bag which we thank
(01:08):
you guys for feeding the content and we hope you
continue to enjoy the content. That we provide here with
the mailbag obviously, and U the full weekend is in
effect here and it's the only way you get Gas
gone to work on an Easter Sunday is to record
it several days before. But there he is, west of
(01:29):
the four oh five, coming in to join the fun
here tailgating at our part a David gascon the private
gaging pretty much. Stay from those introductions. They applaud you
(01:49):
for bringing me on into this part A lot of fun.
And how embarrassing is it every week you have to
hit that button to hit the sound effects? Embarrassing at Crappola?
Is that? No shame? You do it every week? What
are you talking about? You have live people calling your
show to lick your ass like that's what they do.
(02:10):
Who does that? Somebody? You have grown? Name someone right now?
Justin doesn't Justin bust the time about the clippers. He's
a troll. He's a low grade troll. Justin. That guy
would allow you to vomit in his mouth A listen,
that is a sieve. That guy is just an absolute sip,
(02:32):
that's what he is. He's just you don't understand the
mallow militia motto. All right, We welcome everyone, right, we
have the Mallew Militia oath, which, by the way, we
have not given out in a long time, the Mallew
Milicia oath. But the Mallew Militia motto is it doesn't
matter whether you're liberal or conservative, or independent, or gay
or straight, or it doesn't matter you're raised. We don't.
We're not into racial identity politics like the Democrats are.
(02:55):
We welcome everyone, but we bust each other's balls, all right.
And you're not good at that. You can't handle that,
guess on you can't. That's why the Malla Militia eats
you a lie. Okay, they eat you alive. The piranha.
They smell blood in the water and they attack they
and we don't even have to send in the piranha.
(03:17):
The attack puppies get you. The poodles that the attack
poodles get you. Now, they're all little bitches. The Mallar
motto is grab ankles for Ben Mallar, no matter what.
That's exactly what they do on point as scheduled Monday
through Friday and sometimes eight days a week. That's fine, wow,
all right, when are you taking your next holiday? I
(03:39):
don't get holidays. What are you not showing up to
work again so we can get we can get a
plumber in here next week. How about that electrician. That's
what you did, plumber, electrician, a carpenter. I do need
an electrician, dude, if you know a good electrician, contact needs. Well,
let's get to the mailbag, uh and listen. Cameos obviously avail,
(04:00):
but you want to download the cameo app if you
can get that on your phone or on cameo dot com,
and we'll do a personalized video message just not free.
But if you want your own Mallard monologue themed about
you, you you gotta give me some info, give me a
little bullet point action. But I'll I'll be more than
happy to do a Mallard monologue just for you. Uh.
I've got birthdays, bar mits, fuzz hey, Easter Sunday, got
(04:21):
wedding coming up, pass Over, Yeah, wedding, whatever it might be.
We got well, this could be a big year for
Malla militia weddings. We got luminaries. We've got three power
couples that are gonna get married. You have one in Minnesota, right, Well, well,
well you have Anthony in Anaheim, whose girlfriend soon to
be wife hates the show and and she's they're getting married.
(04:44):
We've got ed and Christina from Spokane. They're getting married
beer drinking Brian and Half Pint. If they survive, we'll
be getting married later the summer. So we got three.
This is a big year for wedding. Now. I'd like
to go to as many of these as I can't,
and I think they're all getting married in Vegas, so
it is doable. Now what happened. We can have like
a Mallard militia theme wedding weekend. We can have one
(05:07):
on Friday, one on Saturday, one on Sunday. Bam, bam bam.
But what if you need to show your papers in
order to get into these weddings? Yeah, well you listen,
that's your president. That's your guy Biden there, that's President's
sleepy San Francisco is doing that now with the giants. Um,
you know what I looked at the protocols at the
baseball stamps. You know the thing that I I I
(05:29):
laughed at was they have mask guidelines, which you're like, fine, whatever,
but they they are not. I guess I'm not allowing
you in several ballparks. I don't know if this is universal.
I know the Indians and the Dodgers have this that
the gator mask is not acceptable. But keep in mind,
if you watch a baseball game, you will see players
(05:51):
on the Dodgers and the Indians and these other teams
wearing the gator mask. So the fan that goes into
the ballpark not allowed to wear the gator mask. But
you know, the guy on the team can can wear
the masks. And it's odd. At Yankee Stadium earlier in
the weekend Game one against the Blue Jays, he had
fans in attends that weren't wearing masks at all. Yeah,
(06:11):
oh my god, I can't believe that. More rules for
thee but not for me is the general mantra. There also, hey,
review of the podcast. We got a couple of good
reviews while back. We've had didn't have any last weekend,
I don't think, but we we do need those reviews.
I know it's a pain in the ass, and who
wants to do that, and you know, you just want
to get the content and move on. But if you do,
(06:33):
take a couple of minutes and give us a review
on the Apple podcast page for the fifth hour, and boy,
does help. It does help. Five stars and then you
write a little little clip there and it's really neat.
It's really neat. Uh is uh Kaiser's mustache wrote just
the best show out there. Um must listen. Big Ben
(06:57):
is always on top of his game. Keep it up.
There you go. I might have edited that, but pretty
much what he said. I'm gonna point that out. Yeah,
all right, let's get to the mail bag. We got
got a lot of questions, so we'll go quick. Yes, right, alright.
Kevin in Kansas, Right, since it's been you mentioned Keith
(07:18):
Smart in a trivia question this week and how he
started at Garden City Community College. That's right. He's the
only n c A A player of the final four,
player of the tournament. Whatever it was that that was
a jew cool player, Keith Smart back in the day
at Indiana, he said, Kevin says, which is just down
(07:39):
the street for me. I was wondering if you ever
covered any budding sports stars when they were in community
college earlier in your career before you hit the big time. Well,
I there were a few that made the pros then
when I was doing community college play by play at
Saddleback College, Anthony Carter was our top player. He was
(07:59):
a guard, played for the Miami Heat. Hit a game
winning shot at Madison Square Garden in a playoff series.
He's an assistant coach with the Atlanta Hawks now, but
he played in the NBA for like ten years. He
would go on to go to Hawaii, but he was
on the team that I was at at saddleback Keon Clark,
who you probably don't know he played in the NBA.
(08:20):
He was. He played at Irvine Valley College. We we
did some games that he did and as its saddleback.
And then the third person that I remember. I'm sure
there's more, but the third that I remember, we did
a football game. Saddleback was playing at Gagon's old school
and the quarterback was Steve Sarkisian. And uh so those
(08:42):
are the three that that stand out. El Camino College, Yes,
el Comino College. And that's before Sarkeesian went to b
y U, before he fell in love with Whiskey, uh
you know, and all that. And now he's the head
coach of Texas, right, so I've had a house connection
with the last two Texas Longhorns coaches pretty well. The
(09:05):
previous coach was an intern at the radio station I
worked at, and now sarkis all right? R J Insane
Antonio says, I sometimes hear you say the phrase, oh
y'all jumping onto the third rail during the show when
it's about to briefly turn political. What is the origin
of that phrase and when did it begin? Well, good question,
(09:27):
r J. In San Antonio. It's rather obviously if you've
ever been on a subway, it comes from the subway system.
Right there, there's a pair of rails that the subway
cars on, and then in most subway systems, there's that
third rail that runs between or alongside, and that third
(09:48):
rail is where the electricity is. So if you touch
the third rail, you're going to die. Many people have died.
It's also an homage to our boss, are programming guru,
the Great Don Martin, along with Scott Shapiro run Fox
Sports Radio, and uh Don's quite the character. And I've
(10:10):
met with Don several times. I have good relationship. We
don't talk that often, but when I've been in Don's office,
Don Martin, and when we discussed the show and what
we talked about and here, you know, anything political or
things like that. The third round, my third round you know.
That's so we're quoting him when we do that. It's
a way to suck up secretly, stealthily to our boss.
(10:32):
Third round, my m because that's his quote. That's his quote.
But it goes back to like the late eighteen hundred's
the first subway system with that with that technology in
the like the eighteen sixties, So it's been around for
a hundred and sixty years. That that phrase so fun
fact Marcus and chin No California says, when you were
(10:56):
taking a shower, this is for both of us, when
you were taking a shower and you have to pee,
do you stop what you're doing to go to the
toilet then resume your shower, or do you take care
of business and improve your aim in the drain during
the shower? And Marcus says, any guy that says they
don't aim in the drain is a liar in his opinion. Well, absolutely,
(11:21):
we all piss in the shower, don't. I don't believe
people that stop the shower. I don't buy that. Now
it gets a little more dicey if you got to
drop a deuce, Like if you're in the shower and
you gotta squirt, squirt, some some turns out that that
becomes problematic because you do have to stop the shower.
I don't think you've gotta be like an animal to
(11:41):
to poop in the shower, right, yeah, because then you
just ruin you know, once you do get out of
the shower, though, then you just ruin the toilet paper
because it's all wet. So it's really it's a bad
and it's a bad situation. Well, plus, you gotta get
whatever you left in the shower, assuming it's not running.
If it's a solid turd, you gotta then pick it
up and get rid of it. It comes you're not stop. No,
(12:05):
I I completely agreed. And it's like those baseball players.
It's good for your skin, right, the urine is good
for your skin. Yeah, Jorge Posada moises alu. Yeah. Jason
from Beautiful Rocky Mount, Virginia says most of us have
had an experience, UH riding around with your friends when
(12:28):
you were kids. Did you ever get pulled over by
the police, Uh for the first time? Give me your
age and all the details you can recall of your
first police involved situation. Uh police, All right, yeah, I
I will tell you the one I remember. Jason my
first interaction with the police when I got my driver's license.
I was like sixteen years old and I was driving
(12:52):
across town to football practice. It was it wasn't training camp.
It was like the offseason like practices that we're having
during the summer. But I was running late, and uh
I got ding. I got pulled over for going a
little too fast and I didn't have my driver's license.
(13:13):
I had forgotten to take my wallet with me, and
so I I started sweating profusely. I was freaking out,
Oh my god, I'm gonna go to jail because I
didn't have my wallet. And uh the the officer did
me a solid, gave me a lecture. It didn't even
give me a ticket because you said, told me to
go home and get my wallet, and uh I did,
(13:34):
and uh So I had a good interaction the first time.
But that's that's the one I remember. I I was
just when when those cherry tops came on behind me,
and I got oh my god. It's like I was
trying to remember, like what are you supposed to do?
And like, you know, because you're a kid, you're like,
you know I do in the parking lot? Do I
stop on the side. You know, it was like the
whole thing. What about you, gagun? I remember, was it
(13:56):
with your dad? Did he pull you over? Did? He
was with my my mom and my my three sisters.
We were going to school. My mom was running late.
She was a teacher, and she was speeding from our
house to UH to school to drop us all off.
And an officer a a bike a bike cop pulled
us over. And I remember the first thing he did
(14:17):
was looking the back and all of us are obviously
belted up, and so he looked at us like in
the passengers said to see my other sister, and then
looked at my mom, and you know, obviously gave us
the whole rundown. I'm a speeding in the whole nine
yards and then uh then yeah, obviously uh gave us
a warning and we were off on our way. But
I remember that I was like, oh my gosh, what's
going on here. I thought it was like a big
(14:38):
formal thing, like it was a procession to go to
school or something like that, because obviously my dad was
in the Harvard Division at that time, UH Pierre in Springfield, Massachusetts,
right since he's with a the vaccine rollout being in
full swing. Would you be open to having a Christmas
in July ugly sweater cookout? That's from Pierre. You will not. Well,
(15:03):
you know, we we're gonna handle. I was watching the
Dodger Rockies games and with you know, crowds. It looks
like to me almost a full house at some of
those games in Denver, so there's people are coming back
milling about. I'm not gonna lie. I think you're a
little hesitant about doing something like that, like you would
the worst thing that can happen I go out and
(15:24):
do stuff. I think it's a lot of these these
rules I think are more for optics than anything. I'll
remember that if if I if I come to your
house and I go in your freezer and I see
that fucking Tomahawks still there, I'm a little piste off,
a little piste Off'm not gonna lie. Maybe it's in
(15:44):
my belly, definitely not. What are you getting the vaccine?
By the way, I guess you probably not gonna do
that anytime soon. No, I think you're eligible right now.
I don't know if I'm actually we are eligible. We're
considered a frontline workers. Really yeah, yeah, if you have
your badge on the Yeah, your your badge to come
(16:05):
into the building, slash that and you get right away. Yeah,
we have a couple of colleagues that did that at
Dodger Stadium and also at cal State Northridge. They got
to the front of the line because we're considered essential
personnel because of the news agency that well represent interesting.
I wanna, I wanna that's the Marshal right, is not
the Marshall bill or whatever? That? Yeah? Yeah, when when
(16:28):
are they coming out with a one shot so you
don't have to do the two Johnson and Johnson that
they consider a one shot. Now, you might have to
get a booster once every year, but Johnson and Johnson's
considered the one shot. Yeah, I maderna and fiser or two?
What are you gonna get it? I don't know. I
mean my wife wants me to. She had it and
she's fine or whatever. Actually, the fun and the funny
(16:48):
thing is I told my my brother, my liberal brother,
uh in Wisconsin. He just got the vaccine and he
was asking me the same question you asked me, and
I told him, I said, oh, no, you're my guinea.
I'm gonna wait and see how you do. And then Uh,
which is true. I mean we have the same DNA,
So if nothing happens to him, I think I'm good,
you know, So I'm gonna wait until he gets the
(17:09):
second shot in a couple of weeks, and then nothing
happens with him, I'll go down and get my vaccine.
But you could agree to that. There's not that's not
it's not a reason to to go rush into it,
right Like it's just oh no, I'm not rushing you.
I mean I wanna you know, I want to make
sure you know everything is is good, and you know,
many every day more people get the vaccine, and it
(17:31):
seems like most most everyone's okay. So you know, there's
always gonna be a margin of error in anything where
you know, crap goes wrong with anything. There's bad police,
there's bad teachers, there's bad doctors. But as long as
it's a very low percentage, you play play the plus.
I don't think we have any choice here at Kisco,
and I think if you don't do it, you're not
gonna be able to do anything. So it's a it's
(17:53):
an interesting dilemma. Uh. And Pierre also says, what is
the shelf life of the average frozen steak asking for
a friend. Boy. We're gonna find out though, one of
these days. Barry in Tennessee, our buddy Barry writes in
who Questions for this week, he said, I know we
have our favorite callers and those who we don't care for.
(18:16):
But I don't think I have ever heard why Eddie
does not care for the calls of Rachel from Manta
Bello dealy dedy Uh if you had to guess, why
does Eddie not care for Rachel's call? All right, So
good question, Barry. I have to theory theories on this.
First of all, I feel like they, the guys on
the show don't like Rachel because she's a big fan
(18:38):
of mine. She's very kind to me, she's very courteous
to me. She's a very polite woman. She flirts with me,
she's flirtatious. This bothers them. They're troubled by that. Secondly,
they're annoyed because Rachel will break out into song and
it's usually the same song, and that bothers them. They're
(19:00):
triggered by that. So though some version of those two
things I would say is why they dislike Rachel. But
I love Rachel. I think Rachel's great, She's fun. She's
a big fan of the show. She's been very kind
to us over the years. She's sent us candies and
whatnot and supported us. So I'm a big fan. Uh.
And also, Barrus is, how did the idea for the
fifth Hour come about? Was it Gascon's idea? No, well,
(19:22):
I'm glad he asked that question. Did you just sit
around and say, you know, I don't think twenty hours
a week of radio is enough. I need to do
three more hours of podcasting. What is the backstory for
the fifth Hour? Be sure to catch live editions of
The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven
pm Pacific. Be sure to catch live editions of The
Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am eastern eleven pm
(19:45):
Pacific on Fox Sports Radio and the I Heart Radio app. Now,
I'm sure we have different versions of this. You want
to go first, Guestcon, then I'll give the truth, or
you want to give the lie after I give the
trip lie of the truth. But you know age before beauty,
I guess you can go first. Well, I'll give the
truth here, Barry, So I had been moonlighting. I always
like to have a couple of gigs. I always like
(20:06):
to have a couple of gigs. I like to juggle
a couple of things. And I had a gig, a
side gig at w e I in Boston doing satellite
broadcasting for the Red Sox station during the night show,
where I would do that two or three days a
week and then I would do my show. So I
was doing seven hours of radio. Uh that show is
like three hours, and sometimes it was four hours. So
(20:28):
sometimes I do eight hours of radio working a real job.
But we switched affiliates in Boston. My my show had
had not been on and it was off the Boston market,
and they picked us up at the Sports Hub, which
is the number one station in Boston. We're excited to
be on there. We've been on there a while now.
The show has done well on the Sports Hub. But
as a result of that, I lost the EI gig
(20:51):
because they're major competitors, and it's like if you work
at Apple, you can't work at Microsoft or Vice versus.
So uh uh. Obviously I get paid much more from
the syndicated show. So I I left EI, and I
was like, well, I gotta do something else, and the
podcast is something I was playing around what I wanted
to do, and so uh I Heart has invested a
(21:15):
lot in podcasting, and they were looking for the content,
and uh tell, here we are now for the lie.
Here's David Gasco. That's interesting. It's a it's a good tale,
and I think it's a fascinating one because you revealed
a few things. Because you you work Carret Fox, uh
I Heart obviously and then w E I, which you
(21:36):
worked at UM both paying jobs. Both the compensated for
your services that were rendered. And so I remember when
this came to its inception, I had the thought that
you should do more digital stuff, and then I had
the I guess the thought, but more like the desire
to do more on the network as well, and to
(22:00):
get my voice out there. And I thought, well, I've
worked on some of your shows. I don't like working
the overnights because you should get off like Eddie gets off,
like at six o'clock in the morning. But I want
to to work with you, and I just thought like, hey,
maybe I could provide that was some support on a
digital platform, since I've done that previously and I do
it to this day. So I remember vividly texting you
(22:23):
about this, and you're like back and forth, back and forth.
And then I specifically remember talking to our our program director,
Scott's Shapiro about this and word I uh say, I
brought it up to him about doing something like this,
and I came to the knowledge that I heard Media
provides each employee with a portal to create podcasting content
(22:48):
if they like to on their own accord. Now there's
no marketing budget behind it, but you are able to
do it free at charge because they will handle all
the background stuff on it. Uh So we had talked
finally put some them together. I had nudged a veto
our sound guide to create a little something something, and
then Scott, by the graces of God, from July to August,
(23:09):
got that thing in motion and eventually it was green
light and we got it off the ground. So that
is the fairy tale version of events, and what I
gave was the real version. We talked about this early
in January of twenty nineteen. Well, I talked about a
lot of Actually I talked about a lot of things,
(23:29):
but you usually talk about a lot of things with
a lot of people. But I wasn't gonna do the
podcast while I had the two radio gigs I was
talking to do it. I my I was stretched thin
as I could possibly be stretched. But it reminded me
when I was doing the EI stuff. It reminded me
when I had the website Ben Mallard dot com and
I would do that for like twelve hours thirteen hours
a day and then do the radio was paying the ast.
(23:50):
Yeah anyway, Uh, Carlos in Bang Bang Houston, Texas, he says,
I'm not gonna lie. David as a producer, was all right?
Kind is that? Congratulations guests on According to our guy
in Houston, you were adequate. Wow, I dope. I love it.
(24:18):
Uh it wasn't great, but was it wasn't bad either? Well,
you weren't bad anyway, Uh, he says. Anyway, what are
your your guys favorite documentary of all time? What are
your favorite documentaries of all time? And what is the
name of the series that you watched on Netflix that
devalued all the baseball cards and stuff like that? All right? Uh,
so you've asked two separate questions. The baseball documentary, I
(24:40):
believe it was called Jack of All Trades. I'm not
sure if it's still available on on the streaming services
or not, but jack of all trades and it goes
into the late eighties early nineties and how the baseball
card and market just all of us who are around
the age where we bought a bunch of baseball cards
were complete jackasses because we we got screwed. They just
(25:00):
kept printing up baseball cards. My favorite documentaries off the
top of my head, the three that stand out that
I recommended or must watch documentaries are Operation Odessa, super Men,
and I'm gonna throw in that super Size Me to
the Chicken thing that we we actually did a podcast
about that a couple of years ago. I thought that
(25:21):
was a really well done documentary. So those are the
three right off the top. Gascon Any documentaries that you
would like to add that there must watch, I guess
being a homer, i'd say, O. J May in America
it was a really good documentary, wonder why. Yeah, that
was fantastic. Um the Al Jazeera documentary that you sent me,
(25:41):
Oh the Dark Side and Dark that was that was
pretty good one. And I think the most entertaining one
for me was what we did the documentary coverage, um
with the fucking Russians and the submarine that was Operational Desk.
It was that was called Operational Desk. Really good one.
Quite a big character, a bunch of characters in that
(26:03):
they got nuclear they got a nuclear sub and helicopters.
And then the way they talked about it was, you know,
they finally rested that guy that was on the run. Yeah,
a couple of years ago, popped him. That was really good.
That was I agree, Uh, well made all right, keep
it going. It's the mail bag Sunday staple. Hey, if
(26:26):
you want to add content, if you think this is
good and you want to add your own question, we
might use it on the podcast. There's a couple of
ways you can do it every Wednesday. I tried to
do it in the morning this week. I did it late.
I think it was probably like almost midnight on the
East Coast. But Ben Mallards Show is the Facebook page,
and I will post every Wednesday on hump Day. I'll say, hey,
I need some questions for the mail bag. I'll beg,
(26:47):
I'll plead and uh and and so many of you
have answered the call. But if you want to get
on there on the Facebook page, you can do that.
Or if you're not on Facebook, or you just want
your your question to be private, you can send a
question in care of the Real Fifth Hour at gmail
dot com. Real fifth Hour at gmail dot com. So
there's a couple of ways you can send your questions
(27:07):
in We do. Thank you for that, John, But Jailer,
our buddy from alan Town, p A. Says Ben in Gascon.
Have you ever had any non traditional pets. My father
was a biology teacher, so we had many creepy crawlers
growing up. Now I want to get a snake, but
the warden says no, So no snake, no snake for
(27:28):
John the jelly. Well, I never had anything crazy. My
brother had a snake, and I've told the story before,
but I was a little freaked out by snakes. My
brother's a little older than me, and my mom and
my brother the snake got out of the cage, and
my mom and my brother said, don't worry, Ben, the
snakes probably out in the in the backyard and the
trees or whatever. You have nothing to worry about. Uh.
(27:49):
And the snake was actually sleeping under my bed. We
found it under my bed and I got a little
freaked out by that. But that's that's about it. What
about you, guess do you consider rabbits a non traditional pet? Nah?
I think more cats, dogs, and fish like a pig
would be a non traditional pet. Pig coyote. No, I
(28:11):
haven't had. We We had our guy from North Hollywood's
got a pet bobcat. He domestic. Yes, we got a
listener who domesticated a bobcat. That's awesome. Uh, yeah, until
the bobcat gets hungry late at night eats your nose.
But yeah, up until there, you're you're good. All right.
Lee from the Valley of the Sun says, how many
(28:33):
times have you guys been fired? Let's see here? I
got fired from FSR one time college football gig, a
studio show that I did, done, NBC Sports Network Done.
That's three. I didn't get fired from six ninety. I
relocated to another station in the company in l A.
(28:55):
I didn't get fired from w e I. It was
I had to leave on my own. Uh. Lost a
couple of website gigs. But I didn't really get fired.
They just didn't offer me enough money, so I didn't
want to do it anymore. When I had Ben Mallar
dot com and I was with Yahoo and Fox Sports
dot com, the money was just not it was ship money.
So I think it's only three times. What about you guess? Yeah,
(29:17):
only once. That was when I was working in the
banking industry, when they started just decimating mortgage departments after
the two thousand and seven two nine mortgage back securities.
That took a nose dive. So you're not counting when
the baseball team went to the Carolinas. No, they dissolved.
The team just dissolved flat I thought they relocated in
(29:40):
the North Carolina and they dissolved flat out. Sure about that.
I'm positive Mason the Millennial alright, see, and he says,
I had another five star review. But this is also
what I'd like to contribute. Uh, he says, all jokes aside,
I love of your guys. Combo. Uh, then this must
(30:05):
be a miss. I don't know. It just says David's
not a bad guy. Okay, this thick it sound? Why
does it sound painful for you to say that? But
but he says, don't don't don't tell him that, all right.
I will not Mason, I will not tell I will
not tell Mason the Millennial at Gagon is a good guy.
And Mason, you should be on Baseball Reference, right, now,
(30:26):
I know it's Sunday, but you should be on Baseball
reference trying to learn you know, maybe one player in baseball.
How about that? You just point that out alright, Ohio,
al rights, and he says, Ben, if you are at
a four way stop intersection, car in front and to
the side are trying to be so nice. They both
(30:48):
sit there forever waiting for the other person to go
How many seconds do you consider it appropriate before you
honk your horn to get somebody moving off their ass.
I usually wait three to four seconds before I I
hit the horn. Do you think that is too much
or not enough? Yeah? Well played? Uh well, here's the
(31:10):
way I I look at all of the variables involved
in this. Am I alone in the car? Am I
with my wife in the car? If I with a
relative in the car? Right? So I look at that. Uh.
Then I also look at the other people, whether or
not they might have guns in their car, right, because
some people get triggered just by a horn honk. But yeah,
(31:34):
three or four seconds is more than enough. I mean,
and we live in the age where every time I'm
at a stoplight, I feel like the person in front
of me is texting away and not watching the signal,
and so there's always this lag time. Now at least
I've noticed this where they're looking at their phones and
they're not driving and paying attention, and so it ends
up becoming problematic. But I don't hank the horn as much.
(31:57):
And I'll tell you why. Al uh, because I have
a rather meek, weak sounding horn. It's not a masculine,
strong horn. It's a very weak horn. And I feel
a little embarrassed. It's like a clown horn. Dude, Like
I said, you know, I don't know. If I had
a more masculine, loud, powerful, intimidating horn, I would use
(32:18):
it more. But I don't. I don't have that sounds prison.
You want to chime in here, are you get? Well,
the rules of the road. You typically have the driver
to your right, you allow them, you yield to the
driver to the right. Now we're not doing rules, we're
doing what actually happens. Yeah, well, I always observe the
(32:38):
driver to the right, So I will wait, and if
I have to wait, i'll wait. Okay. Rock Sanne in
Colorado Rights and you might know her work. She is
a big fan girl for you, by the way, all right,
as she should be I don't know but that, she says.
First off, whoever Gretchen is tell her to go listen
(33:00):
to someone else or something else. Oh, she's referring to
the previous podcast. A second, whoever said Brian Finley was
better at the podcast than Gascon needs their head checked.
Rock Sand says Finley is seriously a creep and a stalker.
Wow damn. She says, his updates are atrocious and he
(33:22):
looks and sounds like he smokes five pounds of we today. Wow,
Rock Sand damn, believe them. I disagree with everything Rock
Sanne said, except the part where he's a stalker. He's
a Stage five clinger, Ryan Finley, she says. Third, whatever
you have to do to get Gascon to do the podcast,
please do it. The chemistry and the banter between you
(33:44):
two is hilarious and much needed entertainment on the weekends.
Rock Sand, every time I see your name, Rocks and
I think of the song by the way, But listen,
listen to me, all right, take a step back, all right.
I know, I know you're a fan of Gascout. I
don't know what happened. I don't know why. It seems
odd to me that you'd be such a fan of his.
(34:06):
But please, I thought it was well written. Yeah, well
interpreted by you. Uh she She's not done. She says
whoever said stick to sports should know you do a
sports show five days a week. And if that's all
they want to hear, they can just listen to that.
Some of us actually do appreciate the podcast and gascon
(34:28):
and some of us are women. Okay, it's good. How
much should you pay for that? Talk about cameo letter?
But it's fine? Okay, Yeah, yeah, Roxanne, just get guests.
Got to do a cameo for you. I'm done, problem solved.
Yeah you do. You would you do a cameo Roxanne wanted?
(34:50):
Like with your shirt off? When you do that? You would? Yeah? Interesting,
I would not be Yeah you would don't. I wouldn't.
I would not do a cameo with my Didn't you
do a cameo video with for someone in your robe? No?
I didn't do it, right. I had a Philadelphia Phillies
(35:11):
like a Philly fanatic goofy hat that I wore for
one that's as crazy as I've got, and I actually
know I did for Hollering James. I did one somebody
bought for Hallerwy James cameo and I wore I had
this like Viking head dress thing that that I wore
(35:31):
his you know, hollering James in Minnesota loves his his Viking,
so I had to I do that, all right. Moving on. Hello,
my name is Tad and I'm from Portland, Oregon. Hello, Tad,
I'm a new listener for about two weeks now. Well,
welcome to the Mallow Militia. Tad. Good to have you
with us, he says. And now I listened to the
(35:53):
entire overnight show, and I guess he's now a podcast
listener as well. He had a question about Matthew Stafford.
I think we answered this actually on the radio show
the other night that but Matthew Stafford is going to
be wonderful, right, this is a major upgrade. They had
that scrawny, hollow cheeked loser in uh in Jared Goff.
(36:15):
I said that with the most kind intentions. But now
they have this colosso veteran, a colossal goliath of a quarterback.
So in comparison Matthew Stafford versus Jared Goff is he's
Stafford's a yetie, alright, He's he's the abominable snowman coming
from Detroit, and he looks like he's in shape. He
(36:37):
looks like he lost weight, you could see it in
his face. He looks like he's in game shape. So
I'm betting on Sean McVeigh being a really good coach,
one of the top five coaches in the NFL. And
if I'm right about that, if I'm correct about that,
then that would mean that Stafford, who hasn't had a
really good coach in his career with the Lions, with
(36:59):
the XS and ohs, ability of Sean McVeigh to drop
up an offense, and now a quarterback that can actually
run that offense without having to be spoon fed like
Jared Golf, this should be an amazing relationship. So I
anticipate big things for Matthew Stepford. We had Sean Salisbury
on the Great Houston Talk Shows to ESPN Guy back
in the day, and Sean Salisbury said he thinks Stafford's
(37:21):
got shot at winning the m v P in the
NFL this year, but that it would be fun. That
division is going to be pretty much wide open if
San Francisco gets fully healthy, well, they don't have I
don't really have a quarterback. The Niners, you know they
have a guy that and the Arizona does. They got
a pint sign and they've got alligator on. It's not
(37:42):
August yet, and there'son to take shots at Murray. Keep
you gotta stay, stay in shape, gotta be prepared. Boys
the garden home there running around there, you go, Let's
use your guy, get shorty. That's that's what the defense
to say when they play year number three for Aler Murray. Yeah,
I've heard that before. Barely bigger than a garden only.
(38:05):
It's gonna be great. We can put some you can
put your your money where your mouth is. When we
get down to regular season totals, yeah, we'll do that.
We'll do that. I look forward to it. Of course,
the total is gonna be low because the Cardinals have
they put a great team together. It was like they'd
have a really good team with all these old guys
they keep signing. Brandon in Wisconsin says, I know this
(38:27):
is more of a girl thing to do, but have
you thought about what you would name your kids slash
children if you were to have them. With our twins coming,
my wife and I have been thinking of both boy
and girl names. It's really becoming difficult. So from Brandon
in Wisconsin. Yeah, the name things. That's a tough one,
right because you a lot of families wanna honor a relative,
(38:51):
you know, from from previous generations. Other people want original names.
It's a tough it's a tough deal. And then the
name is sold part because like it kind of work.
Most people work in to the name, like you know,
the cliche if you you you know, if you name
like a woman a certain name, she's more inclined to
(39:13):
be a dancer. You know what I'm saying. Guess singer,
do you go? Would you go Biblical with the name? Um,
I don't know. It depends if Brandon's a religious you're
asking me, I would likely honor a relative or I
try to come up with a unique name, but not
a unique name that is so off the grid. You know,
(39:36):
there's some names that are not as popular. When I
was a kid, Ben was not a popular name. There's
a lot of people named Ben now, But when I
was a kid, it was not popular and they just
the only band that was famous was Benji the dog
in a in these movies. And uh, yeah, it's a
tough call. I mean that's I'm guessing woke society. At
some point, Brandon will say kids should not be named
(39:58):
until they're old enough to pick their own name, right,
you know, because it's it's it's really wrong that these
kids are forced to have their their names presented to
them by their parents. It's not right. Whatever they do,
they can't butcher the spelling. So if they go Jeff,
please don't go G E O F F. You don't
want the toys r US version. Yeah, you know. And
(40:21):
the other thing too, is like you want your kid
to be able to go to Disneyland and get the
little license plate with their name on it, if possible, right,
if possible. And if you're your your name is like Jabroni,
it's hard to find a little license plate that says
Jabroni or something like that. Anyway. Uh. Jared from Montclair
(40:44):
in Callie says, how do the Clippers win come playoff
time with Kauai and playoff p Well, Jared just watched
stay tuned because they're gonna win the NBA Championship this year. Emmett,
the blind Seahawk fan in Olympia, Washington, says, if you
could buy a shirt that says anything, bad about the Astros.
(41:04):
Would you buy it and wear it now? I'm not
gonna buy astro. Eddie sent me a shirt as a
gift a couple of years ago that said asterisk Houston asterisk,
which is a cool shirt. But that's it. I'm I
don't need to wear any astro astro paraphidia, do not
do not need that. Who else do we have here?
(41:26):
Chris and Edmonton, Alberta says, how many times do you
think Kyrie Irving is going to take a personal day?
Do you think he'll ever play for the Nets again? Wait,
he came back, Chris, you said this before he came back,
But he came back. If he pulls the same stunt
during the playoffs and we if we get there, if
they get there, any chance that the Nets have of
taking home a ring without Kyrie available? Yeah, they can
(41:48):
win without Kyrie. If Harden and Durant are there, they're
they're certainly more than capable of winning. But unfortunately we're
gonna lose to the Clippers in the NBA Finals. Kent
in Colorado writes it. Uh. He says, I've listened to
another fine podcast when he sent this email in he
sucked up to you a little bit clearly that I'm
gonna I'm gonna skip over that part there by job
(42:10):
by him. Uh, he says, when next in Vegas, try
a pastrami on rye from the Greenberg's Delhi at New York,
New York. Good idea, I don't know, but that I'm
a I'm a Langer's Deli guy in l A. But
I don't give a shot. I guess what's your favorite
place to eat at in Vegas? Uh, there's a barbecue
(42:31):
place that we go to that is off the strip,
right near that row that has all the strip clubs
on it. Uh, that's we gotta I gotta get back to.
I've been a Vegas in a couple of years. And
I also loved the the Deep Dish Chicago pizza place, Uh,
which is the same one from Chicago. What's the name
of it? Social the G's Dear Donald's. Yeah, that's it.
(42:53):
But that that's really good. But you gotta you or
you gotta wait an hour. It takes like an hour
for that to make. The pie at at the Heart
Rock Um Pink Taco It's a Mexican cantina. Really fucking good.
Probably my favorite place in in Vegas to eat at,
just because the the margaritas are in those giant bowls
pretty much. And then the plates that you bring out
(43:14):
like a taco plater, a britto plater, just mons stories
or like oh and there was a we found. There's
a speakeasy Italian place my wife likes. And then there's
another Italian place which is off the strip and it's
like open all night. They got you know, typical, but
it's just like in a strip mall. It's really good,
really good fetucchini out freight. I forget the name many.
I gotta come up with the name, but I can't.
(43:36):
Also says that Verne Lundquist lives in Steamboat Springs. We
gotta get Verne Lundquist on the podcast. It can't. If
you run into Verne, can you tell them we want
to get him on the podcast. Give him our card.
I'd love to get Vernon. You know who I would
really like. I want to get Al Michaels. Can we
get al Michaels? Do you know al Michael's a gag on?
(43:58):
He was the first celebrity I ever met. Um, so
you don't know him? What you met him? No, I
don't know. I can try to get him. We should
I had dinner, not that he'll remember, but when the
Kings were in the Stanley Cup finals, I'll love the
l a Kings, And he sat at the table in
the media dining room and told stories about watching King's
(44:19):
games when they were terrible back back in the day.
So he was weren't a baseball cab ract casual. It
was cool. I wonder if he had money on the
puck line. Gordo from Victoria right since says Ben Ben
being a degenerate gambler. As you I previously mentioned, I
(44:40):
am a in a handful of gambling groups on Facebook. Well,
last week when Montres Harold sucked, a guy lost his
bet and he sent Harold a d M on Instagram
and Mantres Harold replied, he said about that. Uh, Gordo says,
have you ever sent a men sage and haven't been
(45:01):
replied to? But I guess he's talking about a celebrity. Um, yeah, no,
I don't usually do that. That's not my my m O,
IM my experience with social media's I'll I'll end up
getting blocked because guys like that pervert. Deshaun Watson, the
accused pervert, will search their name out and get upset
(45:21):
with something I say. They'll hear about it, either from
one of their fans, or they'll hear a clip on
the Internet, or maybe they even listened, and they get
upset and then they'll they'll attack me. Uh. One of
the funniest ones was when in Dominican Sue Who's on Tampa?
When he was coming to the l A Rams, I
had a member of the Malla militia who was tipping
(45:44):
me off told me that the report was that in
Dominican was not going to play with the Rams, that
the contract didn't work out. And a guy who's a
big fan of the show informed me because he had
worked at a certain hotel that in Dominican had checked
in under an alias at the hote Hell and was
about to sign with the Rams. So I reported that
and in Domican got very upset and block me on
(46:08):
on Twitter, upset that I had that inside information. Kathleen says,
who's that guy on your show who laughs like Burt Reynolds. Yeah,
I don't is that Roberto? People like Roberto's laugh be
it might be Roberto. And then the last one from
Charlie in Memphis. Uh, he says Uh, it wants me
(46:30):
to praise. This must be a praise Gascon. It's kind
of a hard weekend for you with all that fan mail.
Did you send out a mass email begging people to
send things in here? And social media power of reach
and uh, power of my brilliance? What can I say less?
(46:51):
None of that is true unless none of that is true,
which is also a possibility. Sounds painful when you read
these emails. Some of them are paying talking, some of
them are paying. All right, listen, have a great rest
of your Easter Sunday and enjoy the baseball and look
forward to the championship game in college basketball. We'll be
(47:13):
back on the radio. I will be anyway tonight live
show Easter Sunday into Monday. We will have the usual shenanigans,
shall we say so. It'll be all available for you
on Fox Sports Radio, the I Heart Radio app, wherever
you listen to the show. And also we'll have a
podcast up on Monday from the program, so we'll catch
(47:35):
you then. Stay healthy, remember review of the podcast, and
we'll catch you then.