December 23, 2024 • 10 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast Elvis.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Morning Show, you know, instead of the box today, I
think we should just go to Andrew and Diamond because
I think you guys brought in something that wouldn't fit
into the.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Box, right. Yeah, Well.
Speaker 4 (00:28):
So we have these books.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Mine is for more offenses that you guys have done
for me over the years or to me.
Speaker 4 (00:33):
Over the years.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
And Diamonds is more positive with happy things that apparently
she only gets to Gandhi.
Speaker 5 (00:40):
Well you you remember the tickets, Andrew, You would give
out tickets if somebody offended you in some minor.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
It has been getting a lot of them lately for
throwing things off my desk.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
Oh, she goes were that while we were recording Serial Killers?
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Why that's natural if someone forwarded near you and walked out,
you'd be like, oh, the toxic fumes have cost a migraine.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
But I'm gonna get the ticket and you get stomach
caches if you hold it in. It's not good for you.
Speaker 6 (01:14):
Now you are now you agree with me, Yeah, but
just not when you do it in here.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
You know, I have to think other people in other
offices probably do something similar. So what other offenses have
you written people up for.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Let's see, Oh, this one was for the interns two
years ago when they ate the food before we got
to eat the.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
By the way, I think we all chimed in that
they still haven't paid. That goes beyond a ticket. That's
a federal offense, prison time.
Speaker 5 (01:44):
Oh wait, did Scarry get a ticket for when he
cut into somebody's birthday cake before they did?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Might have.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
DEA's birthday and you ate the cake?
Speaker 3 (01:58):
I thought you want it? She left it too long?
Speaker 1 (02:02):
I know your exact words.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
Where nobody's touching this.
Speaker 6 (02:08):
Diamond.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Do you have anything positive to add to this?
Speaker 6 (02:10):
Well? I gave Gandhi a ticket not too long ago
for speaking her truth. I don't remember exactly what happened,
but you like stood up for yourself, and I was like,
good for you. That's accommodation, accommodation, badass citation.
Speaker 7 (02:28):
Yeah, so you guys are positive.
Speaker 6 (02:30):
It's still a little ticket because then you get to
rip it off like this one.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Yes, there you go, and it's not all these little
things on it like Okay, what did you do? Where
were you? And what was the offense? And the offenses
are so funny to me, like prioritizing your joy.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
But yes, I love it.
Speaker 5 (02:44):
She gives you these tickets, and I feel so validated
when I know I say something in here that pisses
everyone off. I'll walk out and there's a little ticket
from Diamond, like, yes.
Speaker 6 (02:52):
You did a great job. Gotty gets a ticket for
buying me potato potato sticks. They're so good. Which one
would I sir?
Speaker 3 (03:00):
We were a little bit of a fight, so I
needed to give you that, so you be have hang
the bills.
Speaker 6 (03:04):
Maybe see how you start. Don't make me go and
tell everybody why I was mad at you.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
The I can actually go and find it in this book.
My book has the actual reason.
Speaker 5 (03:14):
Positive, which sums them up perfectly.
Speaker 6 (03:18):
If I may say.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Something bigger question, then what are the unwritten rules of
life here at the morning Show? I think you you
nailed one with the interns not eating food before us.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I think don't wear an excessive amount of perfume or cologne. Yes, Scott,
he says he gets migraines from that, dude. Yeah, I
think Another one is don't fart in a studio.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Yeah that is Yeah, unless it's silent, you can blame
it on someone else.
Speaker 5 (03:45):
No, God, the fumes.
Speaker 6 (03:46):
It's so small.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
We just let you know.
Speaker 8 (03:49):
When I went to the bathroom the other day, she
I walk in, she goes, don't use the middle thow
just took a big dump in.
Speaker 4 (03:55):
There, to be honestly, so honest.
Speaker 8 (03:58):
She's like, yeah, it's just weird.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
It's you're hearing girls say that.
Speaker 5 (04:01):
I think I walked into the bathroom the other day
and she, I guess was looking through the little crack.
So she saw me, and she goes, I'm in here poping.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
Especially people.
Speaker 6 (04:11):
I like, like, if I didn't like you, somebody came in,
was it this morning? I think it was this morning,
and I don't know her, so I let it rock out.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
That's crazy. If someone comes in, I freeze and I
have to wait.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
I think if you did, if you broke the tension,
now you you could probably go because I know exactly
what you're talking about. If you announce it, I don't care.
I'm putting on a show for you.
Speaker 6 (04:31):
And then if you decide to stay. You decided to say, babes,
you know what I mean. I'm gonna do me regardless.
Speaker 8 (04:38):
If anybody says.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Can we get you on another schedule?
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Can like you train yourself to like be like, you
know what, I'm only gonna because because I know for
me personally, I never have to go during these hours
unless I eat some really rancid food.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Yeah, time at the bank.
Speaker 6 (04:56):
I know.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
I know though that when I get home eleven or noon,
I know I'm going to have my time. So is
there a way that you could train your ass?
Speaker 6 (05:03):
No? No, I try to do that, but if very weird.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
Way of doing that. I don't know if I'm being serious,
I don't know.
Speaker 6 (05:13):
Get and whenever I hold it when I'm here, t
m I. But whenever I hold it when I'm here,
I can't go like I get and I can't get
back listen, babes, that's the last thing that I'm going
to do.
Speaker 8 (05:27):
So you're like, Shanni, we know is on a schedule,
so you don't go at the same time every day.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
No, I go, uh when the spirit hits me.
Speaker 4 (05:39):
That's a regular.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
That's weird that Sandy is a direct relationship. You're an
in and out. You're on the in and out policy, right,
Like once you eat something, something comes out.
Speaker 4 (05:49):
I would export.
Speaker 5 (05:51):
Yeah, that it drives my entire family crazy because I'll
be like, no, I'm good. I don't need to go
to the bathroom and then I'm like doing the dance.
Speaker 6 (05:59):
There like you.
Speaker 5 (06:00):
It's been like this is your baby is the word?
Speaker 3 (06:02):
I also don't understand that people are in and out
in forty five seconds?
Speaker 4 (06:04):
How because what am I sitting there for?
Speaker 6 (06:07):
You go at the like when you feel it go before,
don't like try to hold it.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
No, I do go what I feel. But you need
I need like ten minutes for the sphincter to reform.
Speaker 5 (06:17):
That's that's blowing out your ass.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
But I I need to sit. I need to be
there for fifteen minutes.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
So I'm going to get you a fib or something.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Then Andrew didn't go for was it a week and
a half?
Speaker 4 (06:28):
It was three weeks?
Speaker 5 (06:30):
Who die?
Speaker 4 (06:31):
I thought I was going.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Did you take some.
Speaker 4 (06:35):
I did that? I did prue juice, I drank hot water.
It was the most miserable my life.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
Tea, that's the best.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Why were you backed up?
Speaker 4 (06:44):
I have no clue. It's like maybe like ten years ago.
It was so bad. I broke the damn.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
I couldn't even tell you. And it wasn't even like
the damn broke. It was like a pebble. And then
I was like, at least that's something.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
It was not great. It was so bad that.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
First one hurts.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Yeah, and that's why I drink like a gallon of
water a day now because everyone is like, if you
drink a ton of water, it helps your insides.
Speaker 7 (07:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
The way here, this would have been stopped ten minutes ago.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
Yeah, I said the.
Speaker 8 (07:16):
S Hi you know what?
Speaker 6 (07:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 8 (07:18):
Is this on air or then shit away?
Speaker 5 (07:23):
Okay, last thing about that. There is a woman here
who I believe blows up the bathroom more than any
of the men do at any time during the day.
And she does give a damn more than her She
walked far more.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
Is the person still here?
Speaker 3 (07:35):
That's the person is not here anymore?
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Yeah, she's here.
Speaker 6 (07:38):
Wow, damn.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
And one more thing, how come every single time every
time that I'm in there, I get hello because they
come to clean like every since you're there for an hour.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Every day because we complained that the bathrooms were filthy,
so they put us on an extra schedule so they
stop in twice as Okay, can't they have a dude
clean the men's bathroom?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
That is a good point, I mean, and I have
no shame.
Speaker 4 (08:06):
Let's put the dude in duty.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
God. Wait, I had a celebrity story where that person
blew up the bathroom real bad.
Speaker 5 (08:15):
Who was it?
Speaker 4 (08:17):
John Mayer?
Speaker 6 (08:18):
Really?
Speaker 5 (08:20):
He would?
Speaker 1 (08:21):
I tell you that was I thought somebody died in there.
It was like IPEd but I had to do like
a shirt over the nose. Thing wasid.
Speaker 7 (08:33):
I remember being in there next to someone who used
to work here, doesn't work here anymore, and she was
making noises like would and I knew it was her
because of what she was listening to. She did you
always listened to a certain something when she's going, oh yeah,
and her shoes.
Speaker 4 (08:51):
Wait wait wait, she would listen to always listening.
Speaker 8 (08:54):
To like a news thing. So I always knew who
was You know who it is?
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Right, okay? And every time.
Speaker 8 (09:05):
Like like you have to make noises like that?
Speaker 3 (09:08):
What about the people I could talk on the phone
while they're sitting there.
Speaker 6 (09:12):
I do it.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
I do it all about what Henry Well, she's dropping,
I don't.
Speaker 6 (09:17):
Stepping on the big toe that was going on?
Speaker 7 (09:20):
What are you up to?
Speaker 6 (09:21):
Like? What are you up to?
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Just pooping?
Speaker 6 (09:23):
He's so anyway, I call my sister, I call my
mom from there. Well the other day, actually, my cousin's
facetimed me in a group chat and like I answered,
and they're like, where are you. I'm like, I don't care.
Speaker 8 (09:42):
Why do we care?
Speaker 4 (09:45):
Take a book.
Speaker 6 (09:49):
At the end of the day.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
Everybody, Yeah, everybody.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
I would say any time that I dated somebody knew,
I would always say that on the first time everybody
for it's everybody poops, right, and just to get it
out of the way, and Aftery're like, oh, then I'm done.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
But let me tell you.
Speaker 8 (10:05):
If someone said that to me on the first date,
I think like, what is this guy gonna do? And
then he's saying this.
Speaker 5 (10:11):
Yeah, I'd be like, there have an accident.
Speaker 6 (10:19):
You have to wait until people tell you they love you,
and then and even then no, no, no, no, we
got to ride it out.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
So now you have to go now, no, like you
have to think about it. To think about it. You look,
did you ask you? But yeah, how's it? Going back there?
Just training it? She looked, all right, we're done, We're done,
all right.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
The fifteen Minute Morning Show
What would you talk about on your on your podcast Elvis.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Morning Show, you know, instead of the box today, I
think we should just go to Andrew and Diamond because
I think you guys brought in something that wouldn't fit
into the.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Box, right. Yeah, Well.
Speaker 4 (00:28):
So we have these books.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Mine is for more offenses that you guys have done
for me over the years or to me.
Speaker 4 (00:33):
Over the years.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
And Diamonds is more positive with happy things that apparently
she only gets to Gandhi.
Speaker 5 (00:40):
Well you you remember the tickets, Andrew, You would give
out tickets if somebody offended you in some minor.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
It has been getting a lot of them lately for
throwing things off my desk.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
Oh, she goes were that while we were recording Serial Killers?
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Why that's natural if someone forwarded near you and walked out,
you'd be like, oh, the toxic fumes have cost a migraine.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
But I'm gonna get the ticket and you get stomach
caches if you hold it in. It's not good for you.
Speaker 6 (01:14):
Now you are now you agree with me, Yeah, but
just not when you do it in here.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
You know, I have to think other people in other
offices probably do something similar. So what other offenses have
you written people up for.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Let's see, Oh, this one was for the interns two
years ago when they ate the food before we got
to eat the.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
By the way, I think we all chimed in that
they still haven't paid. That goes beyond a ticket. That's
a federal offense, prison time.
Speaker 5 (01:44):
Oh wait, did Scarry get a ticket for when he
cut into somebody's birthday cake before they did?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Might have.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
DEA's birthday and you ate the cake?
Speaker 3 (01:58):
I thought you want it? She left it too long?
Speaker 1 (02:02):
I know your exact words.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
Where nobody's touching this.
Speaker 6 (02:08):
Diamond.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Do you have anything positive to add to this?
Speaker 6 (02:10):
Well? I gave Gandhi a ticket not too long ago
for speaking her truth. I don't remember exactly what happened,
but you like stood up for yourself, and I was like,
good for you. That's accommodation, accommodation, badass citation.
Speaker 7 (02:28):
Yeah, so you guys are positive.
Speaker 6 (02:30):
It's still a little ticket because then you get to
rip it off like this one.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Yes, there you go, and it's not all these little
things on it like Okay, what did you do? Where
were you? And what was the offense? And the offenses
are so funny to me, like prioritizing your joy.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
But yes, I love it.
Speaker 5 (02:44):
She gives you these tickets, and I feel so validated
when I know I say something in here that pisses
everyone off. I'll walk out and there's a little ticket
from Diamond, like, yes.
Speaker 6 (02:52):
You did a great job. Gotty gets a ticket for
buying me potato potato sticks. They're so good. Which one
would I sir?
Speaker 3 (03:00):
We were a little bit of a fight, so I
needed to give you that, so you be have hang
the bills.
Speaker 6 (03:04):
Maybe see how you start. Don't make me go and
tell everybody why I was mad at you.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
The I can actually go and find it in this book.
My book has the actual reason.
Speaker 5 (03:14):
Positive, which sums them up perfectly.
Speaker 6 (03:18):
If I may say.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Something bigger question, then what are the unwritten rules of
life here at the morning Show? I think you you
nailed one with the interns not eating food before us.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I think don't wear an excessive amount of perfume or cologne. Yes, Scott,
he says he gets migraines from that, dude. Yeah, I
think Another one is don't fart in a studio.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Yeah that is Yeah, unless it's silent, you can blame
it on someone else.
Speaker 5 (03:45):
No, God, the fumes.
Speaker 6 (03:46):
It's so small.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
We just let you know.
Speaker 8 (03:49):
When I went to the bathroom the other day, she
I walk in, she goes, don't use the middle thow
just took a big dump in.
Speaker 4 (03:55):
There, to be honestly, so honest.
Speaker 8 (03:58):
She's like, yeah, it's just weird.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
It's you're hearing girls say that.
Speaker 5 (04:01):
I think I walked into the bathroom the other day
and she, I guess was looking through the little crack.
So she saw me, and she goes, I'm in here poping.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
Especially people.
Speaker 6 (04:11):
I like, like, if I didn't like you, somebody came in,
was it this morning? I think it was this morning,
and I don't know her, so I let it rock out.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
That's crazy. If someone comes in, I freeze and I
have to wait.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
I think if you did, if you broke the tension,
now you you could probably go because I know exactly
what you're talking about. If you announce it, I don't care.
I'm putting on a show for you.
Speaker 6 (04:31):
And then if you decide to stay. You decided to say, babes,
you know what I mean. I'm gonna do me regardless.
Speaker 8 (04:38):
If anybody says.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Can we get you on another schedule?
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Can like you train yourself to like be like, you
know what, I'm only gonna because because I know for
me personally, I never have to go during these hours
unless I eat some really rancid food.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Yeah, time at the bank.
Speaker 6 (04:56):
I know.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
I know though that when I get home eleven or noon,
I know I'm going to have my time. So is
there a way that you could train your ass?
Speaker 6 (05:03):
No? No, I try to do that, but if very weird.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
Way of doing that. I don't know if I'm being serious,
I don't know.
Speaker 6 (05:13):
Get and whenever I hold it when I'm here, t
m I. But whenever I hold it when I'm here,
I can't go like I get and I can't get
back listen, babes, that's the last thing that I'm going
to do.
Speaker 8 (05:27):
So you're like, Shanni, we know is on a schedule,
so you don't go at the same time every day.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
No, I go, uh when the spirit hits me.
Speaker 4 (05:39):
That's a regular.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
That's weird that Sandy is a direct relationship. You're an
in and out. You're on the in and out policy, right,
Like once you eat something, something comes out.
Speaker 4 (05:49):
I would export.
Speaker 5 (05:51):
Yeah, that it drives my entire family crazy because I'll
be like, no, I'm good. I don't need to go
to the bathroom and then I'm like doing the dance.
Speaker 6 (05:59):
There like you.
Speaker 5 (06:00):
It's been like this is your baby is the word?
Speaker 3 (06:02):
I also don't understand that people are in and out
in forty five seconds?
Speaker 4 (06:04):
How because what am I sitting there for?
Speaker 6 (06:07):
You go at the like when you feel it go before,
don't like try to hold it.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
No, I do go what I feel. But you need
I need like ten minutes for the sphincter to reform.
Speaker 5 (06:17):
That's that's blowing out your ass.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
But I I need to sit. I need to be
there for fifteen minutes.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
So I'm going to get you a fib or something.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Then Andrew didn't go for was it a week and
a half?
Speaker 4 (06:28):
It was three weeks?
Speaker 5 (06:30):
Who die?
Speaker 4 (06:31):
I thought I was going.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Did you take some.
Speaker 4 (06:35):
I did that? I did prue juice, I drank hot water.
It was the most miserable my life.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
Tea, that's the best.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Why were you backed up?
Speaker 4 (06:44):
I have no clue. It's like maybe like ten years ago.
It was so bad. I broke the damn.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
I couldn't even tell you. And it wasn't even like
the damn broke. It was like a pebble. And then
I was like, at least that's something.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
It was not great. It was so bad that.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
First one hurts.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Yeah, and that's why I drink like a gallon of
water a day now because everyone is like, if you
drink a ton of water, it helps your insides.
Speaker 7 (07:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
The way here, this would have been stopped ten minutes ago.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
Yeah, I said the.
Speaker 8 (07:16):
S Hi you know what?
Speaker 6 (07:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 8 (07:18):
Is this on air or then shit away?
Speaker 5 (07:23):
Okay, last thing about that. There is a woman here
who I believe blows up the bathroom more than any
of the men do at any time during the day.
And she does give a damn more than her She
walked far more.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
Is the person still here?
Speaker 3 (07:35):
That's the person is not here anymore?
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Yeah, she's here.
Speaker 6 (07:38):
Wow, damn.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
And one more thing, how come every single time every
time that I'm in there, I get hello because they
come to clean like every since you're there for an hour.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Every day because we complained that the bathrooms were filthy,
so they put us on an extra schedule so they
stop in twice as Okay, can't they have a dude
clean the men's bathroom?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
That is a good point, I mean, and I have
no shame.
Speaker 4 (08:06):
Let's put the dude in duty.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
God. Wait, I had a celebrity story where that person
blew up the bathroom real bad.
Speaker 5 (08:15):
Who was it?
Speaker 4 (08:17):
John Mayer?
Speaker 6 (08:18):
Really?
Speaker 5 (08:20):
He would?
Speaker 1 (08:21):
I tell you that was I thought somebody died in there.
It was like IPEd but I had to do like
a shirt over the nose. Thing wasid.
Speaker 7 (08:33):
I remember being in there next to someone who used
to work here, doesn't work here anymore, and she was
making noises like would and I knew it was her
because of what she was listening to. She did you
always listened to a certain something when she's going, oh yeah,
and her shoes.
Speaker 4 (08:51):
Wait wait wait, she would listen to always listening.
Speaker 8 (08:54):
To like a news thing. So I always knew who
was You know who it is?
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Right, okay? And every time.
Speaker 8 (09:05):
Like like you have to make noises like that?
Speaker 3 (09:08):
What about the people I could talk on the phone
while they're sitting there.
Speaker 6 (09:12):
I do it.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
I do it all about what Henry Well, she's dropping,
I don't.
Speaker 6 (09:17):
Stepping on the big toe that was going on?
Speaker 7 (09:20):
What are you up to?
Speaker 6 (09:21):
Like? What are you up to?
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Just pooping?
Speaker 6 (09:23):
He's so anyway, I call my sister, I call my
mom from there. Well the other day, actually, my cousin's
facetimed me in a group chat and like I answered,
and they're like, where are you. I'm like, I don't care.
Speaker 8 (09:42):
Why do we care?
Speaker 4 (09:45):
Take a book.
Speaker 6 (09:49):
At the end of the day.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
Everybody, Yeah, everybody.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
I would say any time that I dated somebody knew,
I would always say that on the first time everybody
for it's everybody poops, right, and just to get it
out of the way, and Aftery're like, oh, then I'm done.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
But let me tell you.
Speaker 8 (10:05):
If someone said that to me on the first date,
I think like, what is this guy gonna do? And
then he's saying this.
Speaker 5 (10:11):
Yeah, I'd be like, there have an accident.
Speaker 6 (10:19):
You have to wait until people tell you they love you,
and then and even then no, no, no, no, we
got to ride it out.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
So now you have to go now, no, like you
have to think about it. To think about it. You look,
did you ask you? But yeah, how's it? Going back there?
Just training it? She looked, all right, we're done, We're done,
all right.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
The fifteen Minute Morning Show
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