Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcasts
morning show? The podcast of Champions is now on here.
We read nothing but Champions here. You do this podcast
(00:23):
off to big things? Is that the equation? That's why
it's it's Sam Diamond and myself alright because one day,
one day, guys, big things are going to happen. I'm
just hoping to hitch my horse to a cart that
that's true for And you know why it's going to
happen because things like what Diamond just said before we
(00:45):
hit play happened. So Diamond has an opportunity to go
meet could you say an idol? The star of every show?
All right now of your so the star of every
show or are known as Wendy Williams. She's so excited.
How excited are you? Scale of one to like a thousand,
um ninety nine point nine? Have you met Wendy? Okay?
(01:09):
Because she came up. She's been here, but you weren't
here yet. Okay, very lovely. I really really enjoy her alright,
as as many as many do. But I don't think
if she were to ever find out what you just said,
you would do if you had the chance to meet her,
if she would enjoy you as much, Diamond. I'm going
(01:30):
to say it again. Are you ready please? So we
were just talking. Elvis came in said, hey, are we
all good? You're all set? You're like yeah, And then
you said, I just want to lick her eyeball. That's
that's sorry. I know it's weird, but like, I don't know,
here's the thing, just like she makes me want to
do outrageous things. Apparently, isn't there a celebrity though, Garrett,
(01:51):
Like I started making fun of her, and then I
took a step back because this isn't there a celebrity
that you want to do something not sexual, but something
a little weird. No, we like the weirdest thing would
be like sitting at a bar having a beer, not
licking someone's eyeball every day. So you're telling me, if
Wendy Williams was in this room, you, Diamond would put
your tongue out and approach her her face and I
(02:14):
wouldn't do it, but I would want to it in
the back of my mind, like you know what I
think about doing every once in a while. John Krasinski
has the most beautiful smile to me, and sometimes I
just stay dream about like touching his teeth like their
piano keys. But here's the thing, just going over them. Like,
but that's that's like almost a fantasy because you're thinking
it now. When Wendy Williams will be face to face
(02:36):
with Diamond at some point today, Remember one, we don't know,
we don't know that you're going to be in an
audience of people. But so you're going to be very
close to her. It's not going to do it. Yeah,
I'm not gonna do it. That's a thing if you're
going to say it, if it's a thought, but it
has a chance to become a reality. No, no, no,
no no, not so you wouldn't do it. I wouldn't
do it, but I think about doing it the time
(02:57):
that I was around her. Yeah, that's okay, me and
the teeth you in the eyeball, it's a thing like
that's like me saying that, like I want to jump
on Elvis's back when he comes in in the morning.
I'm not really going to try to do it, So
botha over are you kidding? Of course? I have friends
that over exaggerate like no other. It's the Hey, I
(03:19):
just need a couple of hundred minutes to get ready, Like,
what's just tell me you need five minutes and that's it. See,
but these are things Diamond doesn't claim in action like that.
These are things she just thinks of. Like I think
that means, Diamond, you are in touch with your creativity
and imagination. That is, you are really getting psycho in
on this one, saying, just give her an excuse to
(03:41):
We all have weird shower thoughts throughout the entire day.
She's not in the shower, and she thought about it,
But I thought about it like that, I said it
out loud. I have giant paddock attacks sometimes when I'm
just sitting on air off Mike, and I'm just like,
what if I just yelled motherfucker right now? And then
I started panicking like it's gonna happen. I'm like, but
(04:03):
you didn't know that was only a thought, right, That's
what I'm saying. We have these crazy thoughts that just
kind of, you know, take over your imagination from time
to time. That's okay. Who else do you want to
lick their eyeballs? Like it would be your number two? Um,
maybe not an eyeball lick, but I think i'd want
to smell Beyonce's toes. I think that hers are probably
like the most disgusting things on the planet because it's
(04:25):
like the only thing that you don't see on her
all the time. So I would want to, okay, maybe
not smell her actual toe, well, like hold her shoe,
but because I was like, she never wears more than
the shoe one time though, they probably all smell brand
and if you wear shoe, like you know, if something
brand new, you still have that new shoes smell like
(04:45):
when you wear it for the first time. And knowing Beyonce,
she probably you know, donates them or gives them to donate. Yeah,
has years upon years of Beyonce shoes. Dare you salange
still smell like they're fresh out of the box, so
you really wouldn't be getting the true Beyonce, okay, or
(05:06):
like i'd want to how about her pillow that smell?
I think i'd want to smell jay Z's pillow because
that hair. He doesn't look like he puts a comb
through it at all. But he's out right now though,
are like Okay? Like I think about when I'm watching
movies and it's always this romantic scene between two different
(05:28):
whatever characters and they're always very sexually attractive. Like I
wonder honestly how each of their breath smells right now,
and how the other actors do they pop them into
or they do some gum. Tell me that not one
actor has like holotosis, no matter how from it's true
(05:52):
which particular things thetis of just smelly breath. He has
smelly breath constantly, you know, and not everyone has a
conscious of that, so you know, there's definitely those scenes
where something something musty is happening and not everyone's privy
to it. All right, well, let's take it a step further.
We talked about the hypothetical situations. What things can we
(06:12):
admit right now to each other as friends, the gross
things that we have done, Like I'll go first, yes, please,
I've sniffed my belly button. How you're that flexible? Not
not like put my nose down to my belly button,
but like after the showering, that's regular, Garrett, that's right,
I'm sorry, miss normal. What do you want to know?
(06:32):
What do you want to know? Sniffed my toe jam?
Why are your toes making jam? What are you doing?
Like you ever like you've never like when you go
into foot no, not, I'm actually kind of should I
call your boyfriend and my toes but it's weird, I
don't know, so like you've never gone to get your
toes done and they like clean the inside of your toes. Yeah,
(06:54):
I haven't been, Like, hey, do me feel creepy? But
like once you see that, you know that. Let's and
no matter how much I wash my toes, some there's
like stuff in there. Okay, you know, so sometimes I'll
just you know, dig my d You know, I'm going
to be honest. I mean, as a child, I used
to suck on my toes. So you and every how old,
(07:15):
give me an age life maybe five ten minutes ago
she stops, All right, Sam, you got what do you
got that you can admit to? I think the grossest
thing about me physically, not emotionally or spiritually is how
long I will am willing to go without washing my hair.
I've definitely gone beyond the solid month, beyond a definitely
(07:39):
beyond a month. I don't have an actually really probably
the same like when I have a weave and I
try not to, like I can't, it's just too much.
The guys are different though, It's like I just watch
it every time I'm in the shower. It's it's kind
of gross. And when I like sometimes to check if
I really have to wash it because it's affecting other people,
I'll judge my hands, my fingers through my scalp, and
I'll smell that not a lot when it's time I
(08:00):
do that after it. Does it smell like diamonds toes?
You know when you were telling that story? Did, by
the way, like I felt my skin crawl, So I
can only imagine people listening. You guys, Oh my god,
Oh you know what I did do one set? I'm
a moment a frustration. Immediately hated myself. I couldn't like
I was trying to clip my toenails and it didn't
(08:22):
like one clip didn't work out really well. And I'm
a very flexible person, and I just ripped it off
with my tea. No, that's discussed. You might have enjoyed
it because it might have been that fungus. I give
it to diamonds. And I asked her how it smells
only mine? I can't do it only yours or Beyonce's.
I said her shoe. A toenail has to have come
(08:45):
off in the shoe. So why is that's rot? You
definitely know Beyonce squeezes into like if if if a
pair of shoes looks good, no matter what, right, we've
all done it. We where we saw something that might
have been a little bit too small for her foot
and we're like, screw it. Yeah, Beyonce looks like she's
if it don't hurt it, don't look good. Yeah, she's
(09:08):
too tall for like small feet for her shoes always
look a little don't but don't foot shane yourself. We
just gotta be careful with you. But I'm excited you
get to go see Wendy Williams in a little bit.
I'm gonna be disappointed now after this conversation if you
don't try and lick her eye. No, I'm not gonna
do it. I'm just gonna stare. Should we learn TMZ
that there's going to be a crazy stalker in the
(09:28):
audience that wants to lick her eyeballs doing But don't
you think Wendy hears that like every time? Like so
yesterday she appeared at Elvis's book signing. She was on
her way to dinner with her friend Tiffany Harish, which
that's just like, what's one of those like exactly, Well,
(09:50):
if you're a good coworker, you would have support. I
shouldn't talk. I wasn't there either happened last night. But
I'm not throwing stones of out it. Well I threw myself.
I threw a stone at myself. What were you saying?
Tiffany Haddish and Wendy Williams, Uh, yeah, they showed up
(10:11):
to the book signing together and and uh supported Elvis, Uh,
just like randomly, and they said they were they were
just scouring books. Tiffany hat she was going to dinner,
and Wendy Williams pretty much just said, oh, let's stop
off and go say HOI to Elvis. And that's what
had happened. But I forget what I was saying before that.
Your toe jam got to me, Oh you should have
(10:32):
been there? Why because but all right, So what I
was gonna say was was that, So you're you're getting
to do something like on your bucket list, go see
and possibly meet Wendy Williams. What would be your next
thing on your bucket list? Diamond? Um, Oh my gosh, Sam,
do you have bucket list items like in in in
the cool moments of life, like working here, Yes, I
(10:56):
think about your Obama like, but like random conversation, like
not in a work environment, just like cool conversation. Oh
my gosh, like you like that song? I love that
song too. Let's listen to it and then pool karaoke
with Barack Obama. You should do that. That would be
bucket list. Do you hear that we're going to speak
that into the universe? I like that. Well. No, see,
(11:19):
mine's bittersweet because if I get my dream, it means
my relationship was ruined. So it can't people. I'm sorry, William,
but if John calls, I'm going to have some serious
thinking to do. But I always wanted from this job
to go on a date with the celebrity and Garrett Diamond.
I was this close several years ago when um, crap,
(11:39):
what's the I'm glad you came to the one that
they came in and the guy with curly hair, the
blond curly haired one, asked his manager to get my email,
and then I told him he should have told the
manager like I thought I was being cute and like
he should ask for and then he never did. So
it's like a punk move. The star opportunity. Listen, like,
(12:01):
if he's going to ask, Like, if he's going to
be a guy or at least a gentleman, he would
have asked for your email or even more emails a
little shady too, because emails like oh I didn't get
it or I went to my spam. That's that's something
like if I meet any like let's just say, I
meet you, Sam, you and Diamond for the first time ever,
and I'm like, oh, I would love to hang out
with him. I'm not gonna go, Hey, can I get
(12:23):
your email? Hey, George, go get his email? Want his
people like host other people's phone numbers all the time.
It wasn't gentlemanly. But it was a cheap move, and
I'm a cheap girl. I would have been funning with it.
Let's check. Let's check where they want want a dog
right now, we're Auntie. I think his name was Jason,
and they wanted Let's look up the wanted real quickly.
(12:48):
The wanted boy. Well, there's Max, which Elvis's dog is
named after. The dream guys. Siva is another one. He's
the tall one. Yeah, who's Shay? I think it might
have been j It was j J McGinnis kind of
(13:08):
gives me like, listen, it just would have been a
bucket list item. And now if I'm lucky enough for
that to happen, it means I did something terrible thru
in my current relationship with no I think you're good
right now. I think Will versus Jay McGinnis from the wanted,
not that he could. I know he could take it.
Will could pretty much take anyone at this point in life.
(13:29):
But I'm just saying I think Will has a few
up on Jay McGinnis. I think so personally. What about you, Garrett,
what's your buckets item? From here? See a lot of
my bucket list items. I'm in a weird position where
I've gotten to meet a lot of people that I've
I almost have to come up with the next bucket list.
Like I've gotten to meet Derek Jeeter, I've gotten to
(13:51):
hang out with justin timber Lake. I've gotten to meet
Jay Z and have conversation with but like conversation, not
just like hey, nice to meet you, like but and
George Clooney, Ryan Reynolds, You've got such a rap sheet.
But that is the rate of g list Garrett, What
is something dirty that you dirty. That's a bucket list
dirty dirty Diamond wants to lick an eyeball. I want
(14:14):
to go on a date with a celebrity. What's your thing?
I would say, I would say I would go back
to like the old school. And she she's back in
the news now just because of the Saved by the
Bell reboot. She just found out that is happening. Uh
what Tiffany Amberthy, Tiffany Feason? Eighties men just melt over?
Nineties stop aging me, Kelly Kelly a date with Kelly
(14:36):
Popowski or Tiffany Feason, go along with no no, ask
for her to stay in character. That's that's creepy. That's
almost Diamonds. I liking creepy. It's not women loving man
in uniform. Why can't you love a girl? Says Menders. Well,
enjoy your toe jam and met Williams Diamonds fifteen minute
(14:59):
Morning Know