November 5, 2024 • 37 mins
This week, Tommy is joined by actress Sarah Drew who is best known for playing the fan-favorite role of Dr. April Kepner for 9 seasons on Grey’s Anatomy. This role catapulted Sarah into becoming a household name and even a trending hashtag (#JAPRIL) week after week. Now she is bringing some holiday cheer, starring in and executive producing the series, Mistletoe Murders out now on HALLMARK+. Sarah stars as Emily Lane in a series that blends the mystery and intrigue of Veronica Mars with the festive charm of Hallmark’s holiday programming. Today, Sarah opens up about what she’s most proud of from her long-running character on Grey’s Anatomy, the ways she transformed as a person throughout her time playing April, how she worked through the pain of being let go from the series, the important lessons she learned through that difficult time, her thoughts on returning to Grey’s Anatomy, why her heart is singing with her latest project, Mistletoe Murders, if working on a Christmas project is as magical as it seems, why she feels that she is in the greatest chapter of her career, the sobering lesson she learned about the importance of being present, how a Pixar movie allowed her to really acknowledge the good and bad of her emotions, if she agrees that Mariah is the queen of Christmas, and so much more.
Subscribe, rate and review this episode if you enjoyed this conversation!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, guys, welcome to I've never said this before with
me Tommy de Dario. I hope you all are feeling
festive because we are officially kicking off the holiday season
with the guests. Who is bringing some much welcome cheer.
The wonderful actress Sarah Drew joins me today, who you
know and you'd love from playing the fan favorite roles
of Doctor April for nine seasons on Grey's Anatomy, Hannah
(00:24):
Rodgers and Everwood and many more beloved roles. But today
she is serving you some Christmas joy because she stars
in the new series and Mistletoe Murders for the new
streaming service Hallmark Plus. And Mistletoe Murders It's out now.
She plays Emily Lane in a show that blends the
mystery and the intrigue of Veronica Mars, which was such
(00:46):
an epic show with the festive charm of course of
Hallmark's holiday programming. Who doesn't love a little mystery at
Christmas time?
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Right? Sign me up?
Speaker 1 (00:54):
So go grab a comfy blanket and a hot cup
of cheer. As we reflect on Sarah's past fan favorite work. Yes,
we shot lots about Cray's Anatomy. We dive into her
journey and some of the struggles she's faced along the
way and how she's overcome them, and we celebrate this.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
New chapter of her career.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
So let's see if today we can get Sarah to
say something that she has never said before. Sarah Drew,
it is so good to see you.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
How are you, my friend?
Speaker 3 (01:23):
So good? I'm good. I'm in a good stage in
my life.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
We love to hear I am fantastic. I am fantastic.
But it's not about me, because I am now talking
to a cover model, Miss Thing, a cover model, a
cover model. Yeah, I see you, I see you, powerful
woman in Hollywood, tell me about.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
This stop it?
Speaker 3 (01:48):
Yeah. I mean I just went to the Variety Power
of Women event last night, and it's just ridiculous to
be invited into that room with so many and credible
powerhouse women making changes in the world and within Hollywood itself.
You know, I feel really grateful though, because I think
(02:08):
from my very first professional show was led by a woman,
and then my first my ever would the showrunner was female,
and then Gray's Anatomy obviously is like a matriarchy, you know.
So I've had so many incredible women in leadership from
like this jump in my career. So it's been exciting
(02:30):
to get to sort of expand after having had the
beautiful exams, so many beautiful examples.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Well, isn't it cool that you're also one of those
powerful women in leadership like you looked up to so
many in your career, and here you are doing the
damn thing. That must feel pretty good.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
It feels really good, you know. I think I still,
especially at events like last night, I have like imposter
syndrome completely take over my body because I just feel like,
what am I doing here? I didn't get to be here.
When I think about powerful leadership, I think about compassion,
I think about passion, I think about taking care of
(03:09):
the people that work for you. And so I don't know.
I think power in and of itself can have a
negative connotation, But so I don't. I just don't. I
don't know that I feel like I belong there, But
I know that I love leading, and I've been in
this sort of leadership era over the last six years
that has been so gratifying and so beautiful. Just getting
(03:34):
to kind of stretch my wings a little bit in
that regard.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Well, you earned it, You've put in the time, you've
put in the work, You've had such an incredible career,
and it's nice that you're at a point where now
you can be more in a leadership role and kind
of call the shots a little bit more and pave
the way in the way that you want to pave it.
So it's all really really cool, and I'm excited for you.
In this chapter of your life, we of course have
to reflect a bit on some of your fan favorite work, right,
(03:59):
So I feel like the project that put you on
the map is a small little show, Gray's Anatomy that.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Probably no little show, no.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Er, no, nobody's heard of it, right, And you were
part of that for I believe nine seasons, correct, seasons? Yeah,
nine seasons.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
So when you think back to your time on that,
what are you the most proud of?
Speaker 3 (04:18):
Oh, I'm proud of so many things. I mean, I've
forged some beautiful relationships that I will have with me
for the rest of my life. I'm really proud of
April's story and her arc and I you know, I
had the most incredible gift of getting to witness Sandra
(04:38):
Oh for several years while while we crossed over on
the show the way that she cared about her character
and her storyline and would advocate with with love and
passion to the writers, and there was such respect between
her and the writers. She really modeled a beautiful way
(04:59):
to get to collaborate in the journey of your character.
So I kind of took a page out of her book.
And when they made my character a person of faith,
that is something I know a great deal about, and
so I was like, I would love to just participate
in telling this story. Well, and Shonda Rhimes she said, welcome.
(05:22):
You know what all I want to do is tell
an authentic and beautiful story that feels real. So anytime
if something you know rubs against you, or anytime you
have an idea that you want to put forward, please
the door is open. We want to tell a really powerful,
complicated story about a person of faith. And I'm so
proud of I use my voice all the time for
(05:45):
the rest of the time I was on that show
and got to really participate in the journey in April's journey,
and I think it made a pretty powerful impact on
a lot of people's lives.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
She's a character who means a lot to so many.
How do you think you change as a person throughout
your life time on that show, because that's a long
time of your life to be involved in one project,
especially in the public facing way. Is there a way
you can think of that you've really changed during that process.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
I mean, so many things happened during that time. I
had both of my children, so I became a mother
while I was playing April. I go back and I
watch early episodes as April, and my voice changed, like
after having children, My voice got a little bit deeper.
It was like higher and more nasally when I first
joined the show. Also, they took me through so many
(06:34):
different twists and turns, and especially the episode that jumped
a whole year, and in that year, April went to
war and then came back and was a completely different
human and I had to figure out I had to
fill in all the blanks that weren't on the screen
(06:54):
and create an entirely new person that still was her,
but different because that what was written in the script.
She's very different. But the challenge of getting to just
it was like I got to play six different characters
while I was on the show, So it was very challenging.
(07:18):
Pushed me in so many different ways as an artist,
just in terms of what I could carry in my
body and express in my body, and I bring that everywhere.
And also the being let Go taught me how to
surrender really and to hold things lightly and loosely in
this industry because things can change like that and you
(07:39):
never know what's going to happen. And it really forced
me to look at the deepest parts of my identity
and go, I'm still valuable, I'm still worthy, I'm still lovable.
I'm still a friend and a wife and a mother
and a sister and a daughter, like all of these
things that make me who I am, even if I
don't have this that has so identified me for so long.
(08:03):
So I mean, tell me, I changed so much during
those nine years. It was, you know, like earthquaking challenge
and change.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
And I'm really glad you brought up being let Go
because that's something that's so hard for so many people
in any area of any career.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
And I saw you all over the headlines lately for
Oh my goodness, your quote was everywhere quote mean and
unjust or something like that.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
You know what's ridiculous too, It's just ridiculous clickbait headline
because as soon as you click on any of the articles.
The whole story, first of all, the irony, the whole story.
I was telling a silly story about clickbait headlines, about
one thing I said in an interview that then became
the headline everywhere, and then in the telling of that story,
(08:52):
it came clickbait headline again, Hollywood is gonna Hollywood. It's
just what it's going to do. The ridiculous thing. The
thing that was so sad about all those headlines is
that it made it seem so negative, and I was
telling a story about an overwhelming outpouring of love. Actually
it was that is my heartbeat, and the engine that
(09:16):
runs my life is like looking for the gold in
the moments of pain. And that's the story I was telling.
And the only thing all the people wanted to put
on the headlines is the pain part.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
I know, I know, I know, and I saw it everywhere,
and I'm like, there's got to be more to this,
you know, And yes, you were, I imagine you did
probably feel that in the moment, but it wasn't The
story you were sharing wasn't about that. It was about
I imagine being able to like what you said, move
on from something that that is painful, how to navigate that,
like so many people have to do, and not let
that define you for the rest of your life. I mean,
(09:50):
I imagine there was a period where you were a
little bruised, right, and you were like, okayly, how do
I kind of jump back on the horse?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
So how did you move forward?
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Because I think it's an import or a message for
anyone struggling with any sort of what they might feel
is rejection, right, yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
I mean the funny thing is I immediately felt such
overwhelming support and love immediately, like exactly when it happened.
I went back to my trailer and I had person
after person knocking on my door and coming and hugging me.
You know. Two days after that, I had four test
(10:27):
offers for four different leads and four different pilots sitting
on my desk. Fans organized a plane to fly over
and say how much they loved me and Jessica. You know,
like I think if the pain hadn't happened, that love
wouldn't have been so epic. And I mean the love
was so intense that you could reach out and touch it.
(10:49):
I was so overwhelmed with gratitude inside of that moment
of loss, that when Shonda and Betsy called me just
to say we love you, and you know, we're so
sad to say good bye, but you know we love
you forever, and I wept on the phone with them
and just couldn't think of anything except an outpouring of
(11:09):
gratitude because of all the things that I had learned
and how I'd grown, and the gift of the show
that the show had been to me. And that was genuine.
That wasn't me trying to just kiss anybody's ass. That
was an outpouring of the support that I received. So
I think for me, I've always I was raised to
(11:32):
hunt for the good in moments of pain. I believe
so strongly that we walked through life holding pain and
joy or pain and hope in both hands at all times.
We're always having little pains and little losses happen. And
how can we find what is beautiful and what is
(11:52):
good inside of that, Because if you're looking for it,
you will find it. If you're not looking for it,
you won't see it. But it's everywhere. The goodness is everywhere,
So I don't It's how I'm designed, It's the engine
that drives my life. And yes, it was a big grief.
There's no getting around it. It was a big pain
(12:12):
and it was a big grief. Watch that become the
headline of this podcast. I mean, don't let it happen.
Oh my god, no pressure, no control over it. Yes,
it was painful, and also it was so heart expanding
and growing. And I walked out into the world and
(12:35):
I started writing, and I started producing, and I'm directing
and I'm making my own stuff and I could not
be happier.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Whatever anyone listening believes in the universe, God, I believe
there are no mistakes or accidents, and you're really put
in the direction you're meant to go in. You know,
some of the biggest hardships we face in the moment,
it might be difficult to see the why, but I
always say, you gotta trust in that process. There is
a why and it will be become revealed. Look at
where you are now. You're doing the most incredible things.
(13:05):
And to be very clear, to put all the clickbit
and headlines aside. There is no ill will, no ill feelings.
You're good with the show, You're good with everyone.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
All the things.
Speaker 3 (13:16):
Thank you, thank you. They won't include that quote. But
you know you tried.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
I'm trying. I'm trying for you. I'm trying, You're trying.
I'm trying.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
I have so much love for that place and that
show and the experience and the great gift of the
platform it gave me. And I couldn't say enough beautiful
things about that experience. And also it hurt, wasn't that
when I was like, Oh, like there's I don't there's
no getting around it. That's not a surprise. That shouldn't
(13:47):
be a headline. No.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
I know, I know it's so wild and you have
so much going on. We're going to talk about one
of those things very shortly. Here's an interesting question, with
where you are in your life right now and with
everything you went through with that series, if there was
an opportunity where they said, hey, Sarah, we want you
(14:11):
to become full time again with where you are in
your life now, would you know.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
That would be a no. I would come and do
like a fun arc, but like being locked in in
that world again. I'm doing too many other things that
I'm really excited about, you know, And I feel like
I really got to tell her story and I feel
really proud of April's story in April's journey, and again
I would love to hop back in and say hello,
(14:38):
that's the door is always open. But in terms of
like a long term you signing a three year contract
or whatever, I don't think so. I think I did.
I think I did it, you know.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
And it's a beautiful place to be in where you're like,
what you just said, I did it, I loved it,
and I'm excited for everything else coming up, and you
can check off that you were a trending hash tag
off your resume. I mean, how many people can say
that with hashtag Japril you were a trending hashtag.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
Jpril had power, man, Japril was powerful. That was fun.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
Yeah, like every week you're like, oh, it's trending, it's trending,
it's trending.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
Not a lot of people can.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Say that, Well, thank you. I mean, the the other
half of that is that Jesse Williams, who's just I
love that guy so much. So we had such a
beautiful partnership on that show and really both cared about
the journey of it, and we're super invested and passionate
about telling that story and elevating it in every possible
(15:38):
way we could, and so it was really fun to
get to see the audience really embrace us. It was
really cool.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Yeah, it certainly is one of the most popular I
feel like couples in pop culture history, which must be fun.
But now now we're going to a whole other world
of Christmas and cheer and good tidings that we all
will bring.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yes, all of it. I'm trying to keep going with the.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Murder and.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
Murder.
Speaker 1 (16:07):
So tell me about your new project, which sounds unbelievable
and so exciting.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Dude, it is so good. I'm so proud of it. So,
first of all, I had the most magical experience shooting
this show. We were in Toronto, and I'm just knocking
on all the wood for many more seasons because I
want to be with that cast and crew forever. I
love them. We had a like our set was just
(16:34):
joyous and we would laugh all the time. And but
the wonderful thing about this show is there's there's like
comedy and adventure and romance. The romance is really nice,
and mystery and intrigue and Christmas Like with the backdrop
of Christmas, it kind of fills for me like a
(16:56):
Veronica Mars sort of gap. There has like a Veronica
Marzy sort of feel to it, which was one of
my all time favorite shows.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Amazing.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
That was so fun. So the experience of it was
so good, and I got to be an executive producer
on it, so I got to give input on scripts
and cuts and helped cast and like all of those
really fun things. But then when I saw the cuts
come in, I was just like, oh my gosh, this show.
(17:29):
Not only was it such a joyous experience, but the
show is so good. It moves, it's got everything you want,
and it's life affirming and it's hopeful, all the things
that make my heart sing as a person and as
an artist. It's like it's got everything. It's got everything.
And my character is really fun because she's got this
(17:52):
secret past that starts to pop in and you get
little kind of breadcrumbs of it and flashbacks throughout the
first season, but you still don't, you know, you don't
get the whole picture yet, so there's miles to go
and miles of more story to tell. It's a very
very fun character. She kind of has two lives. Mmm.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Oh that's such a tease.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
And I love the name Thistletone Murders.
Speaker 3 (18:18):
Yes, well, it's based on an audible podcast and they
just released their third season. Actually, but we have all
different mysteries and Kobe Smolders plays it in the podcast,
which is super fun. But I but like, yeah, but
Ken Cooper's has crafted it's a very the show is
very different than the podcast. But yeah, I mean nobody's
(18:41):
really done the murder mystery at Christmas time, the like
Christmas noir, cozy Christmas mystery.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Ooh yeah, I think it's going to do really well people.
I mean, who doesn't love a themed holiday movie or show.
Everybody wants more of that. And like you said, I
think mystery too. It's just so fun. And you're an
EP on this. So going back to our earlier kind
of conversation where you are in your life in this
new chapter and being able to kind of dictate and
have a say in the things that you're doing in
(19:10):
a bigger way, has that just been a total pinch
me moment in your career in terms of like, WHOA,
I got here on my own?
Speaker 3 (19:19):
Yes, I mean every time I'm and I'm working on
multiple things. So I also wrote a new spicy, sexy
Christmas movie that's going to be on Lifetime called a
Carpenter Christmas Romance. So I was actually writing that while
I was shooting the show on my drives. I had
to buy myself a lap desk, and I was literally
(19:39):
doing rewrites just on my way to work every day
on my forty five minute drive, and then on the weekends.
This it's the only time I could write. So that
was crazy. And then it was greenlit off of my
second draft, and then it was We started shooting that
ten days after I got home from Mistletoe Murders Bananas.
(20:00):
Multiple pinch me moments sometimes, and I'm developing something else
right now as well. So many moments where I go people,
they keep saying yes, they keep saying yes, go for it, Yes, Sarah,
we want you to do this. Pinch me is the
best way I guess to put it. Just like, really,
I get to do this, I get to make my
(20:20):
own stuff and then people say yes and then make it.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
It's wild. But I love it so much because not
only the creative process of the storytelling. I love being
in all of the creative decisions. I love helping pick
out music. I love I love giving notes on the
cuts as they come in and kind of getting in
there and figuring out ways to tell a story in
a way that feels, oh, you know whatever, whatever my
(20:49):
input is. But what I really, really really love is
being a leader on set. That is my favorite part
of all of it because you really get to set
the tone and if you show up with your whole self,
all your lines memorize with encouragement and enthusiasm. It is contagious.
(21:10):
It goes everywhere, it spreads everywhere, and that is the
greatest joy for me is to just walk on a
set with my whole heart wide open and be like,
let's play. This is awesome. You all are so good
at your jobs and look what we get to do
for a living. How insane is this? That is my
(21:33):
favorite part of getting to be in this position.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Well, what a mindset you have, and to go through
life like that, I feel like makes it so rewarding
because you truly can stop and be grateful for what
you're achieving in real time, which is something that's so
hard for so many of us. Right It's getting out
of the present, it's looking forward to what's next. It's
not appreciating the now but worrying about what's coming down
the line, and it seems like you've cultivated this really
(21:58):
important mindset to.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Enjoy the journey you're on now.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Have you always been like that or did it take
you a minute to get there?
Speaker 3 (22:05):
It took me a minute to get there. It's funny
I've had I've had people ask me a lot what
would you tell your younger self? And I have the
great gift of a full journal of my experience playing
juliet at the Macarter Theater, which was my first professional show.
I was still in college at the time, but my
professors let me do it as an independent study. I
(22:27):
came to school five weeks late for my fourth year
of college to play Juliette. And I have meticulous journal
entries for every single day and the whole process. So
I recently, actually in twenty twenty, went back and read
the whole journal all the way through, and I was
weeping because this twenty year old Sarah was so in
(22:49):
love with the artistry. She was so in love with
just being in the presence of professional actors, getting to
learn how to use shakespace, beer's language, and how to
take the sort of ebbs and flows and the waves
that he takes you on in the dialogue and experiencing
being in this beautiful theater with these incredible people. My
(23:13):
journal entries were all about I can't believe I get
to do this. And the thing that was happening while
I was feeling all these things is that my whole
career was starting. The reviews were coming in and they
were exemplary, to the point of like there was a
producer ready to bring us to Broadway based on the
reviews that we'd been getting. And then nine to eleven
(23:35):
happened and all the theaters went dark, so we didn't
But I didn't read any reviews until the end of
the show. I read them all after we wrapped, But
I wasn't thinking about what is this doing for me?
How is this launching me somewhere? I was just inside
of that moment in the most beautiful way. And I
think that when you grow older and when you're in
(23:57):
this industry for longer, some of that stuff can fade
if you are not actively grounding yourself in the present
moment and going I said yes to this project, which
means I'm going to be fully present and fully joyous
and fully prepared with my heart wide open, right now,
right here, not for what it might get me, not
(24:18):
for how strategic it is. But if I want to
tell this story, I say yes to telling this story,
and then I'm going to give it my whole heart.
I think that I lost a little bit of that
in my twenties. I was like, I'm like, Oh, what's this?
How's this going to do? I kind of felt like
once I was on Gray's Anatomy, I thought that I
was going to become a movie star. And I remember
the summer after my first season on the show, nobody
(24:42):
was asking me to be in their movie. I didn't
get those phone calls, and I remember getting so full
of rage. I'm on a hit show. I am a
series regular on a hit show, and I'm angry. I
was angry. I was furious. I was like, why wan,
why can't I have R And I got to a
(25:03):
place where I was like, I don't want to live
like this. This is gross, this is this is I
will never ever be happy or satisfied or fulfilled if
I'm always looking toward what is this going to do
for me next? So that was actually a really big
turning point for me in my life and the way
(25:25):
that I look at my career and the way that
I show up was that moment, because I saw a
version of myself that was ugly and I didn't want
to be that.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Oh my god, that's I got chills hearing that story,
because hey, that's really cool that you're vulnerable enough to
admit that and feeling that right, because so many of
us would think, oh my god, I don't want to
be judged for that. But we all have had those
moments where we're like, what the mm like this should
be happening for me and why is it not? And
no matter what career you're in, we all felt that way,
and you're right, like, holding on to that anger is
(25:55):
so not worth it.
Speaker 3 (25:57):
It's so ugly. It's so ugly, and it also like
it does serve me in any way. You know, I
have so much to be grateful for, And that really
did shift my perspective. Just kind of going to the
ugly parts of myself made me go, I don't want
to live there. Why would I do that? Why would
I just live a career where I'm constantly disappointed and
(26:19):
mad that it's not more Because it's never gonna be enough. Never,
there is not a ceiling that you get to and
then you're like, oh, now I'm here. It doesn't happen.
There's always a higher rung that you can get to.
And if you live your life just desperately trying to
get to the next thing, you will never notice the
(26:40):
joy and the beauty of what's happening right now in
this moment.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
What a good reminder for all of us. Yes, yes,
yes to all of this, Sarah. I didn't know you
were taking me to church today.
Speaker 3 (26:49):
Hallelujah.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
I am here for all of it. And look where
you are now again. It's like doing such an amazing thing.
The things the series is going to be huge.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
I know it is.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
People are going to eat it up and devour it.
Speaker 3 (27:10):
Is.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Being in a Christmas themed project as fun as it looks,
because now it's you got you have a few under
your belt.
Speaker 3 (27:16):
It is so much fun. Can I tell you what
I do? Since that says my first one, which was
in twenty eighteen, I do a viewing party. Whenever I
have a Christmas project come out where I have everybody
show up. It's usually just my girlfriends. They have to
come in Christmas pajamas or Christmas onesies and we have
a big breakfast potluck. We eat breakfast for dinner, so
(27:37):
it's like, what is your Christmas breakfast meal? And then
bring your favorite delicious breakfast thing. And I make a
special like Christmas cocktail, and we watch the movie in
our cozy jammies eating breakfast for dinner. And it's my favorite.
And I feel like every year, if I don't have
a Christmas movie, I'm like, I feel bereft. I'm just like,
but I have to have my party. I have to
(27:59):
have my pajama Christmas party. I love. It is so
much fun. It's I mean, minus the like we're usually
shooting Christmas in summer, right, oh, you know, minus the
needing to pass out in a winter coat when it's
two hundred degrees out. Outside of that, it's so much fun.
It's so festive. I love it.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
I secretly have always dreamed of being in one scene
of a holiday movie.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
It's like, got me put it out there, and we
got to make this happen. It has to happen.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
I could be a shirtlest sexy olf, I could be whatever.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
You have to be shirtless.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
I mean, I feel like it's listening back in the day.
I don't like to admit it, but I got my
start in this career by being a Harlequin romance cover boy.
Speaker 3 (28:44):
No you did not, I did?
Speaker 2 (28:46):
I did. I did.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
And ever since then I'm like, and I did some
Christmas scenes, But ever since then, I was like, you
know what, I got to be in a holiday movie,
in a scene.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
I just have to make it happen, have to.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
It has to happen. We're manifesting it. It's going to happen.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
We are manifest Yes, what we are? Okay, real quick
holiday rapid fire questions. Let me get a sense of
where you stand on some of these things. Number one,
I mean, I feel like I don't even need to
ask this, but just in case, are you a fan
of the Queen of Christmas, Mariah Carey?
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Yeous sleep come on?
Speaker 2 (29:16):
Like you have that album playing?
Speaker 3 (29:19):
I love that song, But most of my Christmas music
that plays is like Christmas Carols. I like this because
that's what I grew up with, just like the sacred
Christmas Carols and all people's different spins on those. So yeah,
but I do love I do love Miss Carrie.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Number two very controversial. Do you use white lights on
your tree or do you like the old school vintage
Christmas colored lights on your.
Speaker 3 (29:42):
Tree, right, white, white, white, always white, always white.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
Favorite Christmas song I'm gonna.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Say Silent Night. I just it always. It's nostalgic for
me because growing up, we would have a Christmas Eve
service in our church and the last song we would sing,
all the lights would go out and we'd light candles
and everybody'd be holding a candle and we all sing
Silent Night acappella, and that was that's the end of
(30:09):
the Christmas Eve service. Right before then you go home
and you have your time with your family or whatever.
It's a very like special I love I love that song.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
That feels like a Hallmark Christmas scene in a movie.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Oh just wait till a Carpenter Christmas romance. There's some
there's some candle light things. All right, all right.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
We're ready for it. We're ready for it. Yes, give
me those bread crumbs. Favorite city to spend Christmas in
if you had a choice, most mad city, Vienna.
Speaker 3 (30:37):
I got to do Christmas in Vienna for it was
my first Christmas project with Hallmark and I got to
be in Vienna at Christmas time, like we were shooting
two weeks before Christmas. So all of the Christmas markets
were set up, and we went to the most incredible
(30:58):
concerts at the music That city is the most magical
place to go anytime, but especially at Christmas.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Okay, it's on my list.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
And lastly, what is the appropriate time to put up
the tree?
Speaker 3 (31:13):
We do it. So this is our new tradition we
do because we in La the tree dies within twenty
seven seconds, so we don't do real trees anymore. We
have a fake tree. We put it up on Thanksgiving weekend,
so either that Saturday or that Sunday after Thanksgiving. And
now last year was the first year we did this.
We put on the movie Spirited, and my husband and
(31:35):
I had Manhattan's and we decorated the tree with Spirited playing.
It is now I will never not do it that
way from here on out.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
Well, I like that. Good for you.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
You might be appalled mine goes up like the first
weekend of November.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
Oh my gosh, I'm not appalled. Look, it's a beautiful
time of year. Why not have I get up early
in the morning and make my coffee and like journal
and do my little stuff before the kids get up.
When it's Christmas time and that tree is lit up
and that's the only light in the room, and the
and the sun hasn't risen yet. Love it so much,
(32:11):
I would want it all year. I mean, I get it.
I get a November first, I get it.
Speaker 1 (32:15):
Yeah, it's a magical time. We want we want to
celebrate it as long as we can. And you are
magical because you've been so open and real during this interview,
which I always so appreciate. I love bringing on fan
favorite artists who get to show people who they are
and not the characters. Right, It's it's all about who
you are as a human. And Sarah the name of
(32:37):
the show, as I've never said this before, and I
wrap every interview with the question based off the title
of my show. So I'm wondering, is there anything today
that you can think of that you've never said before
that you want to share whatever it means to you.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
Yes, I've been thinking about this question, Tommy. I watched
Inside Out Too several weeks ago. My son and bought
it for us on Amazon as a birthday gift. He
used his money to buy it so that we could
all watch it together because I'm dying to see it
and we hadn't been together, and I wanted to watch
it together. I wept my way through that whole movie,
(33:13):
like died. It was so intense and so beautiful. So
here's the thing I've never said before is that since
that movie, which I think was so illuminating and so brilliant,
I now talk to my emotions in my head as
if they're the little characters. I go, anxiety, honey, you
can go sit down. You don't need to be here
(33:36):
at the steering wheel. I'm okay, and I can let
Joy take the wheel again. You can go sit in
your chair and you can have a little massage and
you can relax. I know you're being vigilant and you're
trying to keep me safe. I have a lot of anxiety.
That is that's my I've talked a little bit about this,
but not like it's it's I have a lot of anxiety,
and it'll wake me up in the middle of the night.
(33:56):
It'll wake me up. And the spin, spin, spin, spin, spin,
and having a visual of there are all these emotions
that exist inside of me that aren't the totality of me,
and they're there to in some way care for me
and keep me safe. Having the language and the visual
(34:20):
of this sweet movie that was so genius to kind
of look and speak to the emotion directly and say
it's okay, you can sit down. Joy, can you come please? Joy,
please come, please come take the wheel again. It's such
a gift to me. I'm watching it's language that my
daughter has now too. My anxiety is at the wheel again. Mom. Okay,
(34:45):
you can tell her to sit down. So yeah, that's
my I know, talk to voices in my head.
Speaker 1 (34:52):
You know what, though, good for you because it's such
a good way to check yourself right and and really
honor what you're feeling. And I think that's something that's
a really important message to put out there. It's not
just the brushings aside or act like it doesn't exist,
or you're you know, oh, I'm just being silly. I'm
not anxious, or I'm not sad, or I'm not angry. No, like,
honor it, acknowledge it.
Speaker 3 (35:12):
There she is. Yeah, yeah, And I think that often also,
anxiety is with me so much that I forget that
what I'm feeling is anxiety, you know, but actually being
able to stop and go, ah, you're doing that thing
again where you're imagining all the worst case scenarios and
(35:35):
playing them all out and trying to figure out if
you'll be prepared for all of them. Like, that's anxiety,
and anxiety is right now stealing my joy. So I'm
such a visual person and have always been a visual person.
So having the image of that sweet little character, like,
I'm trying really hard to keep you safe, to.
Speaker 1 (35:57):
Be like you're okay.
Speaker 3 (35:58):
I know you are, and I love you, but you
can go over here. I don't need you. I just
think that it clicks me into health faster. It gets
me back into the driver's seat faster, And I applaud
the creators and the writers and Pixar for making something
that's so beautiful and helpful.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
Yeah, it allows people, especially younger kids, to feel okay
talking about emotions, which you know, we all grew up differently.
I come from a very old school Italian family. It
wasn't something I grew up really doing. So it's nice
to be able to have that space and see through
Disney that like, oh my god, it's okay to do that.
So I'm totally with you, Sarah. What a treat to
(36:41):
hang out and to talk with you every time. I
know it's been a few years since we last saw
each other, but I feel like we jump right back
in and I always always love our conversations.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Me too. It is so sweet.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
Thank you for coming on your new show. Mistletoe Murders
is out and every week and new episode drops, so
everybody go watch it, watch it again, have those pajama
parties with cocktails and breakfast for dinner, foods and all.
Speaker 3 (37:08):
The things right, yes, all the things.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
Thank you, my friend.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
I'm wishing you a great holiday season and congratulations on
all your success.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
Thank you so much, Tommy.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
I've Never Said This Before is hosted by me, Tommy Dedario.
This podcast is executive produced by Andrew Piglisi at iHeartRadio
and by me Tommy, with editing by Joshua Colaudney. I've
Never Said This Before is part of the Elvis Duran
podcast Network on iHeart Podcasts.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
For more rate review.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
And subscribe to our show and if you liked this episode,
tell your friends. Until next time, I'm Tommy Dedario
Hey, guys, welcome to I've never said this before with
me Tommy de Dario. I hope you all are feeling
festive because we are officially kicking off the holiday season
with the guests. Who is bringing some much welcome cheer.
The wonderful actress Sarah Drew joins me today, who you
know and you'd love from playing the fan favorite roles
of Doctor April for nine seasons on Grey's Anatomy, Hannah
(00:24):
Rodgers and Everwood and many more beloved roles. But today
she is serving you some Christmas joy because she stars
in the new series and Mistletoe Murders for the new
streaming service Hallmark Plus. And Mistletoe Murders It's out now.
She plays Emily Lane in a show that blends the
mystery and the intrigue of Veronica Mars, which was such
(00:46):
an epic show with the festive charm of course of
Hallmark's holiday programming. Who doesn't love a little mystery at
Christmas time?
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Right? Sign me up?
Speaker 1 (00:54):
So go grab a comfy blanket and a hot cup
of cheer. As we reflect on Sarah's past fan favorite work. Yes,
we shot lots about Cray's Anatomy. We dive into her
journey and some of the struggles she's faced along the
way and how she's overcome them, and we celebrate this.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
New chapter of her career.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
So let's see if today we can get Sarah to
say something that she has never said before. Sarah Drew,
it is so good to see you.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
How are you, my friend?
Speaker 3 (01:23):
So good? I'm good. I'm in a good stage in
my life.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
We love to hear I am fantastic. I am fantastic.
But it's not about me, because I am now talking
to a cover model, Miss Thing, a cover model, a
cover model. Yeah, I see you, I see you, powerful
woman in Hollywood, tell me about.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
This stop it?
Speaker 3 (01:48):
Yeah. I mean I just went to the Variety Power
of Women event last night, and it's just ridiculous to
be invited into that room with so many and credible
powerhouse women making changes in the world and within Hollywood itself.
You know, I feel really grateful though, because I think
(02:08):
from my very first professional show was led by a woman,
and then my first my ever would the showrunner was female,
and then Gray's Anatomy obviously is like a matriarchy, you know.
So I've had so many incredible women in leadership from
like this jump in my career. So it's been exciting
(02:30):
to get to sort of expand after having had the
beautiful exams, so many beautiful examples.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Well, isn't it cool that you're also one of those
powerful women in leadership like you looked up to so
many in your career, and here you are doing the
damn thing. That must feel pretty good.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
It feels really good, you know. I think I still,
especially at events like last night, I have like imposter
syndrome completely take over my body because I just feel like,
what am I doing here? I didn't get to be here.
When I think about powerful leadership, I think about compassion,
I think about passion, I think about taking care of
(03:09):
the people that work for you. And so I don't know.
I think power in and of itself can have a
negative connotation, But so I don't. I just don't. I
don't know that I feel like I belong there, But
I know that I love leading, and I've been in
this sort of leadership era over the last six years
that has been so gratifying and so beautiful. Just getting
(03:34):
to kind of stretch my wings a little bit in
that regard.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Well, you earned it, You've put in the time, you've
put in the work, You've had such an incredible career,
and it's nice that you're at a point where now
you can be more in a leadership role and kind
of call the shots a little bit more and pave
the way in the way that you want to pave it.
So it's all really really cool, and I'm excited for you.
In this chapter of your life, we of course have
to reflect a bit on some of your fan favorite work, right,
(03:59):
So I feel like the project that put you on
the map is a small little show, Gray's Anatomy that.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Probably no little show, no.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Er, no, nobody's heard of it, right, And you were
part of that for I believe nine seasons, correct, seasons? Yeah,
nine seasons.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
So when you think back to your time on that,
what are you the most proud of?
Speaker 3 (04:18):
Oh, I'm proud of so many things. I mean, I've
forged some beautiful relationships that I will have with me
for the rest of my life. I'm really proud of
April's story and her arc and I you know, I
had the most incredible gift of getting to witness Sandra
(04:38):
Oh for several years while while we crossed over on
the show the way that she cared about her character
and her storyline and would advocate with with love and
passion to the writers, and there was such respect between
her and the writers. She really modeled a beautiful way
(04:59):
to get to collaborate in the journey of your character.
So I kind of took a page out of her book.
And when they made my character a person of faith,
that is something I know a great deal about, and
so I was like, I would love to just participate
in telling this story. Well, and Shonda Rhimes she said, welcome.
(05:22):
You know what all I want to do is tell
an authentic and beautiful story that feels real. So anytime
if something you know rubs against you, or anytime you
have an idea that you want to put forward, please
the door is open. We want to tell a really powerful,
complicated story about a person of faith. And I'm so
proud of I use my voice all the time for
(05:45):
the rest of the time I was on that show
and got to really participate in the journey in April's journey,
and I think it made a pretty powerful impact on
a lot of people's lives.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
She's a character who means a lot to so many.
How do you think you change as a person throughout
your life time on that show, because that's a long
time of your life to be involved in one project,
especially in the public facing way. Is there a way
you can think of that you've really changed during that process.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
I mean, so many things happened during that time. I
had both of my children, so I became a mother
while I was playing April. I go back and I
watch early episodes as April, and my voice changed, like
after having children, My voice got a little bit deeper.
It was like higher and more nasally when I first
joined the show. Also, they took me through so many
(06:34):
different twists and turns, and especially the episode that jumped
a whole year, and in that year, April went to
war and then came back and was a completely different
human and I had to figure out I had to
fill in all the blanks that weren't on the screen
(06:54):
and create an entirely new person that still was her,
but different because that what was written in the script.
She's very different. But the challenge of getting to just
it was like I got to play six different characters
while I was on the show, So it was very challenging.
(07:18):
Pushed me in so many different ways as an artist,
just in terms of what I could carry in my
body and express in my body, and I bring that everywhere.
And also the being let Go taught me how to
surrender really and to hold things lightly and loosely in
this industry because things can change like that and you
(07:39):
never know what's going to happen. And it really forced
me to look at the deepest parts of my identity
and go, I'm still valuable, I'm still worthy, I'm still lovable.
I'm still a friend and a wife and a mother
and a sister and a daughter, like all of these
things that make me who I am, even if I
don't have this that has so identified me for so long.
(08:03):
So I mean, tell me, I changed so much during
those nine years. It was, you know, like earthquaking challenge
and change.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
And I'm really glad you brought up being let Go
because that's something that's so hard for so many people
in any area of any career.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
And I saw you all over the headlines lately for
Oh my goodness, your quote was everywhere quote mean and
unjust or something like that.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
You know what's ridiculous too, It's just ridiculous clickbait headline
because as soon as you click on any of the articles.
The whole story, first of all, the irony, the whole story.
I was telling a silly story about clickbait headlines, about
one thing I said in an interview that then became
the headline everywhere, and then in the telling of that story,
(08:52):
it came clickbait headline again, Hollywood is gonna Hollywood. It's
just what it's going to do. The ridiculous thing. The
thing that was so sad about all those headlines is
that it made it seem so negative, and I was
telling a story about an overwhelming outpouring of love. Actually
it was that is my heartbeat, and the engine that
(09:16):
runs my life is like looking for the gold in
the moments of pain. And that's the story I was telling.
And the only thing all the people wanted to put
on the headlines is the pain part.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
I know, I know, I know, and I saw it everywhere,
and I'm like, there's got to be more to this,
you know, And yes, you were, I imagine you did
probably feel that in the moment, but it wasn't The
story you were sharing wasn't about that. It was about
I imagine being able to like what you said, move
on from something that that is painful, how to navigate that,
like so many people have to do, and not let
that define you for the rest of your life. I mean,
(09:50):
I imagine there was a period where you were a
little bruised, right, and you were like, okayly, how do
I kind of jump back on the horse?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
So how did you move forward?
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Because I think it's an import or a message for
anyone struggling with any sort of what they might feel
is rejection, right, yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
I mean the funny thing is I immediately felt such
overwhelming support and love immediately, like exactly when it happened.
I went back to my trailer and I had person
after person knocking on my door and coming and hugging me.
You know. Two days after that, I had four test
(10:27):
offers for four different leads and four different pilots sitting
on my desk. Fans organized a plane to fly over
and say how much they loved me and Jessica. You know,
like I think if the pain hadn't happened, that love
wouldn't have been so epic. And I mean the love
was so intense that you could reach out and touch it.
(10:49):
I was so overwhelmed with gratitude inside of that moment
of loss, that when Shonda and Betsy called me just
to say we love you, and you know, we're so
sad to say good bye, but you know we love
you forever, and I wept on the phone with them
and just couldn't think of anything except an outpouring of
(11:09):
gratitude because of all the things that I had learned
and how I'd grown, and the gift of the show
that the show had been to me. And that was genuine.
That wasn't me trying to just kiss anybody's ass. That
was an outpouring of the support that I received. So
I think for me, I've always I was raised to
(11:32):
hunt for the good in moments of pain. I believe
so strongly that we walked through life holding pain and
joy or pain and hope in both hands at all times.
We're always having little pains and little losses happen. And
how can we find what is beautiful and what is
(11:52):
good inside of that, Because if you're looking for it,
you will find it. If you're not looking for it,
you won't see it. But it's everywhere. The goodness is everywhere,
So I don't It's how I'm designed, It's the engine
that drives my life. And yes, it was a big grief.
There's no getting around it. It was a big pain
(12:12):
and it was a big grief. Watch that become the
headline of this podcast. I mean, don't let it happen.
Oh my god, no pressure, no control over it. Yes,
it was painful, and also it was so heart expanding
and growing. And I walked out into the world and
(12:35):
I started writing, and I started producing, and I'm directing
and I'm making my own stuff and I could not
be happier.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Whatever anyone listening believes in the universe, God, I believe
there are no mistakes or accidents, and you're really put
in the direction you're meant to go in. You know,
some of the biggest hardships we face in the moment,
it might be difficult to see the why, but I
always say, you gotta trust in that process. There is
a why and it will be become revealed. Look at
where you are now. You're doing the most incredible things.
(13:05):
And to be very clear, to put all the clickbit
and headlines aside. There is no ill will, no ill feelings.
You're good with the show, You're good with everyone.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
All the things.
Speaker 3 (13:16):
Thank you, thank you. They won't include that quote. But
you know you tried.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
I'm trying. I'm trying for you. I'm trying, You're trying.
I'm trying.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
I have so much love for that place and that
show and the experience and the great gift of the
platform it gave me. And I couldn't say enough beautiful
things about that experience. And also it hurt, wasn't that
when I was like, Oh, like there's I don't there's
no getting around it. That's not a surprise. That shouldn't
(13:47):
be a headline. No.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
I know, I know it's so wild and you have
so much going on. We're going to talk about one
of those things very shortly. Here's an interesting question, with
where you are in your life right now and with
everything you went through with that series, if there was
an opportunity where they said, hey, Sarah, we want you
(14:11):
to become full time again with where you are in
your life now, would you know.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
That would be a no. I would come and do
like a fun arc, but like being locked in in
that world again. I'm doing too many other things that
I'm really excited about, you know, And I feel like
I really got to tell her story and I feel
really proud of April's story in April's journey, and again
I would love to hop back in and say hello,
(14:38):
that's the door is always open. But in terms of
like a long term you signing a three year contract
or whatever, I don't think so. I think I did.
I think I did it, you know.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
And it's a beautiful place to be in where you're like,
what you just said, I did it, I loved it,
and I'm excited for everything else coming up, and you
can check off that you were a trending hash tag
off your resume. I mean, how many people can say
that with hashtag Japril you were a trending hashtag.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
Jpril had power, man, Japril was powerful. That was fun.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
Yeah, like every week you're like, oh, it's trending, it's trending,
it's trending.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
Not a lot of people can.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Say that, Well, thank you. I mean, the the other
half of that is that Jesse Williams, who's just I
love that guy so much. So we had such a
beautiful partnership on that show and really both cared about
the journey of it, and we're super invested and passionate
about telling that story and elevating it in every possible
(15:38):
way we could, and so it was really fun to
get to see the audience really embrace us. It was
really cool.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Yeah, it certainly is one of the most popular I
feel like couples in pop culture history, which must be fun.
But now now we're going to a whole other world
of Christmas and cheer and good tidings that we all
will bring.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yes, all of it. I'm trying to keep going with the.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Murder and.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
Murder.
Speaker 1 (16:07):
So tell me about your new project, which sounds unbelievable
and so exciting.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Dude, it is so good. I'm so proud of it. So,
first of all, I had the most magical experience shooting
this show. We were in Toronto, and I'm just knocking
on all the wood for many more seasons because I
want to be with that cast and crew forever. I
love them. We had a like our set was just
(16:34):
joyous and we would laugh all the time. And but
the wonderful thing about this show is there's there's like
comedy and adventure and romance. The romance is really nice,
and mystery and intrigue and Christmas Like with the backdrop
of Christmas, it kind of fills for me like a
(16:56):
Veronica Mars sort of gap. There has like a Veronica
Marzy sort of feel to it, which was one of
my all time favorite shows.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Amazing.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
That was so fun. So the experience of it was
so good, and I got to be an executive producer
on it, so I got to give input on scripts
and cuts and helped cast and like all of those
really fun things. But then when I saw the cuts
come in, I was just like, oh my gosh, this show.
(17:29):
Not only was it such a joyous experience, but the
show is so good. It moves, it's got everything you want,
and it's life affirming and it's hopeful, all the things
that make my heart sing as a person and as
an artist. It's like it's got everything. It's got everything.
And my character is really fun because she's got this
(17:52):
secret past that starts to pop in and you get
little kind of breadcrumbs of it and flashbacks throughout the
first season, but you still don't, you know, you don't
get the whole picture yet, so there's miles to go
and miles of more story to tell. It's a very
very fun character. She kind of has two lives. Mmm.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Oh that's such a tease.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
And I love the name Thistletone Murders.
Speaker 3 (18:18):
Yes, well, it's based on an audible podcast and they
just released their third season. Actually, but we have all
different mysteries and Kobe Smolders plays it in the podcast,
which is super fun. But I but like, yeah, but
Ken Cooper's has crafted it's a very the show is
very different than the podcast. But yeah, I mean nobody's
(18:41):
really done the murder mystery at Christmas time, the like
Christmas noir, cozy Christmas mystery.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Ooh yeah, I think it's going to do really well people.
I mean, who doesn't love a themed holiday movie or show.
Everybody wants more of that. And like you said, I
think mystery too. It's just so fun. And you're an
EP on this. So going back to our earlier kind
of conversation where you are in your life in this
new chapter and being able to kind of dictate and
have a say in the things that you're doing in
(19:10):
a bigger way, has that just been a total pinch
me moment in your career in terms of like, WHOA,
I got here on my own?
Speaker 3 (19:19):
Yes, I mean every time I'm and I'm working on
multiple things. So I also wrote a new spicy, sexy
Christmas movie that's going to be on Lifetime called a
Carpenter Christmas Romance. So I was actually writing that while
I was shooting the show on my drives. I had
to buy myself a lap desk, and I was literally
(19:39):
doing rewrites just on my way to work every day
on my forty five minute drive, and then on the weekends.
This it's the only time I could write. So that
was crazy. And then it was greenlit off of my
second draft, and then it was We started shooting that
ten days after I got home from Mistletoe Murders Bananas.
(20:00):
Multiple pinch me moments sometimes, and I'm developing something else
right now as well. So many moments where I go people,
they keep saying yes, they keep saying yes, go for it, Yes, Sarah,
we want you to do this. Pinch me is the
best way I guess to put it. Just like, really,
I get to do this, I get to make my
(20:20):
own stuff and then people say yes and then make it.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
It's wild. But I love it so much because not
only the creative process of the storytelling. I love being
in all of the creative decisions. I love helping pick
out music. I love I love giving notes on the
cuts as they come in and kind of getting in
there and figuring out ways to tell a story in
a way that feels, oh, you know whatever, whatever my
(20:49):
input is. But what I really, really really love is
being a leader on set. That is my favorite part
of all of it because you really get to set
the tone and if you show up with your whole self,
all your lines memorize with encouragement and enthusiasm. It is contagious.
(21:10):
It goes everywhere, it spreads everywhere, and that is the
greatest joy for me is to just walk on a
set with my whole heart wide open and be like,
let's play. This is awesome. You all are so good
at your jobs and look what we get to do
for a living. How insane is this? That is my
(21:33):
favorite part of getting to be in this position.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Well, what a mindset you have, and to go through
life like that, I feel like makes it so rewarding
because you truly can stop and be grateful for what
you're achieving in real time, which is something that's so
hard for so many of us. Right It's getting out
of the present, it's looking forward to what's next. It's
not appreciating the now but worrying about what's coming down
the line, and it seems like you've cultivated this really
(21:58):
important mindset to.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Enjoy the journey you're on now.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Have you always been like that or did it take
you a minute to get there?
Speaker 3 (22:05):
It took me a minute to get there. It's funny
I've had I've had people ask me a lot what
would you tell your younger self? And I have the
great gift of a full journal of my experience playing
juliet at the Macarter Theater, which was my first professional show.
I was still in college at the time, but my
professors let me do it as an independent study. I
(22:27):
came to school five weeks late for my fourth year
of college to play Juliette. And I have meticulous journal
entries for every single day and the whole process. So
I recently, actually in twenty twenty, went back and read
the whole journal all the way through, and I was
weeping because this twenty year old Sarah was so in
(22:49):
love with the artistry. She was so in love with
just being in the presence of professional actors, getting to
learn how to use shakespace, beer's language, and how to
take the sort of ebbs and flows and the waves
that he takes you on in the dialogue and experiencing
being in this beautiful theater with these incredible people. My
(23:13):
journal entries were all about I can't believe I get
to do this. And the thing that was happening while
I was feeling all these things is that my whole
career was starting. The reviews were coming in and they
were exemplary, to the point of like there was a
producer ready to bring us to Broadway based on the
reviews that we'd been getting. And then nine to eleven
(23:35):
happened and all the theaters went dark, so we didn't
But I didn't read any reviews until the end of
the show. I read them all after we wrapped, But
I wasn't thinking about what is this doing for me?
How is this launching me somewhere? I was just inside
of that moment in the most beautiful way. And I
think that when you grow older and when you're in
(23:57):
this industry for longer, some of that stuff can fade
if you are not actively grounding yourself in the present
moment and going I said yes to this project, which
means I'm going to be fully present and fully joyous
and fully prepared with my heart wide open, right now,
right here, not for what it might get me, not
(24:18):
for how strategic it is. But if I want to
tell this story, I say yes to telling this story,
and then I'm going to give it my whole heart.
I think that I lost a little bit of that
in my twenties. I was like, I'm like, Oh, what's this?
How's this going to do? I kind of felt like
once I was on Gray's Anatomy, I thought that I
was going to become a movie star. And I remember
the summer after my first season on the show, nobody
(24:42):
was asking me to be in their movie. I didn't
get those phone calls, and I remember getting so full
of rage. I'm on a hit show. I am a
series regular on a hit show, and I'm angry. I
was angry. I was furious. I was like, why wan,
why can't I have R And I got to a
(25:03):
place where I was like, I don't want to live
like this. This is gross, this is this is I
will never ever be happy or satisfied or fulfilled if
I'm always looking toward what is this going to do
for me next? So that was actually a really big
turning point for me in my life and the way
(25:25):
that I look at my career and the way that
I show up was that moment, because I saw a
version of myself that was ugly and I didn't want
to be that.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Oh my god, that's I got chills hearing that story,
because hey, that's really cool that you're vulnerable enough to
admit that and feeling that right, because so many of
us would think, oh my god, I don't want to
be judged for that. But we all have had those
moments where we're like, what the mm like this should
be happening for me and why is it not? And
no matter what career you're in, we all felt that way,
and you're right, like, holding on to that anger is
(25:55):
so not worth it.
Speaker 3 (25:57):
It's so ugly. It's so ugly, and it also like
it does serve me in any way. You know, I
have so much to be grateful for, And that really
did shift my perspective. Just kind of going to the
ugly parts of myself made me go, I don't want
to live there. Why would I do that? Why would
I just live a career where I'm constantly disappointed and
(26:19):
mad that it's not more Because it's never gonna be enough. Never,
there is not a ceiling that you get to and
then you're like, oh, now I'm here. It doesn't happen.
There's always a higher rung that you can get to.
And if you live your life just desperately trying to
get to the next thing, you will never notice the
(26:40):
joy and the beauty of what's happening right now in
this moment.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
What a good reminder for all of us. Yes, yes,
yes to all of this, Sarah. I didn't know you
were taking me to church today.
Speaker 3 (26:49):
Hallelujah.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
I am here for all of it. And look where
you are now again. It's like doing such an amazing thing.
The things the series is going to be huge.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
I know it is.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
People are going to eat it up and devour it.
Speaker 3 (27:10):
Is.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Being in a Christmas themed project as fun as it looks,
because now it's you got you have a few under
your belt.
Speaker 3 (27:16):
It is so much fun. Can I tell you what
I do? Since that says my first one, which was
in twenty eighteen, I do a viewing party. Whenever I
have a Christmas project come out where I have everybody
show up. It's usually just my girlfriends. They have to
come in Christmas pajamas or Christmas onesies and we have
a big breakfast potluck. We eat breakfast for dinner, so
(27:37):
it's like, what is your Christmas breakfast meal? And then
bring your favorite delicious breakfast thing. And I make a
special like Christmas cocktail, and we watch the movie in
our cozy jammies eating breakfast for dinner. And it's my favorite.
And I feel like every year, if I don't have
a Christmas movie, I'm like, I feel bereft. I'm just like,
but I have to have my party. I have to
(27:59):
have my pajama Christmas party. I love. It is so
much fun. It's I mean, minus the like we're usually
shooting Christmas in summer, right, oh, you know, minus the
needing to pass out in a winter coat when it's
two hundred degrees out. Outside of that, it's so much fun.
It's so festive. I love it.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
I secretly have always dreamed of being in one scene
of a holiday movie.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
It's like, got me put it out there, and we
got to make this happen. It has to happen.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
I could be a shirtlest sexy olf, I could be whatever.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
You have to be shirtless.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
I mean, I feel like it's listening back in the day.
I don't like to admit it, but I got my
start in this career by being a Harlequin romance cover boy.
Speaker 3 (28:44):
No you did not, I did?
Speaker 2 (28:46):
I did. I did.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
And ever since then I'm like, and I did some
Christmas scenes, But ever since then, I was like, you
know what, I got to be in a holiday movie,
in a scene.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
I just have to make it happen, have to.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
It has to happen. We're manifesting it. It's going to happen.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
We are manifest Yes, what we are? Okay, real quick
holiday rapid fire questions. Let me get a sense of
where you stand on some of these things. Number one,
I mean, I feel like I don't even need to
ask this, but just in case, are you a fan
of the Queen of Christmas, Mariah Carey?
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Yeous sleep come on?
Speaker 2 (29:16):
Like you have that album playing?
Speaker 3 (29:19):
I love that song, But most of my Christmas music
that plays is like Christmas Carols. I like this because
that's what I grew up with, just like the sacred
Christmas Carols and all people's different spins on those. So yeah,
but I do love I do love Miss Carrie.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Number two very controversial. Do you use white lights on
your tree or do you like the old school vintage
Christmas colored lights on your.
Speaker 3 (29:42):
Tree, right, white, white, white, always white, always white.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
Favorite Christmas song I'm gonna.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Say Silent Night. I just it always. It's nostalgic for
me because growing up, we would have a Christmas Eve
service in our church and the last song we would sing,
all the lights would go out and we'd light candles
and everybody'd be holding a candle and we all sing
Silent Night acappella, and that was that's the end of
(30:09):
the Christmas Eve service. Right before then you go home
and you have your time with your family or whatever.
It's a very like special I love I love that song.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
That feels like a Hallmark Christmas scene in a movie.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Oh just wait till a Carpenter Christmas romance. There's some
there's some candle light things. All right, all right.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
We're ready for it. We're ready for it. Yes, give
me those bread crumbs. Favorite city to spend Christmas in
if you had a choice, most mad city, Vienna.
Speaker 3 (30:37):
I got to do Christmas in Vienna for it was
my first Christmas project with Hallmark and I got to
be in Vienna at Christmas time, like we were shooting
two weeks before Christmas. So all of the Christmas markets
were set up, and we went to the most incredible
(30:58):
concerts at the music That city is the most magical
place to go anytime, but especially at Christmas.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Okay, it's on my list.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
And lastly, what is the appropriate time to put up
the tree?
Speaker 3 (31:13):
We do it. So this is our new tradition we
do because we in La the tree dies within twenty
seven seconds, so we don't do real trees anymore. We
have a fake tree. We put it up on Thanksgiving weekend,
so either that Saturday or that Sunday after Thanksgiving. And
now last year was the first year we did this.
We put on the movie Spirited, and my husband and
(31:35):
I had Manhattan's and we decorated the tree with Spirited playing.
It is now I will never not do it that
way from here on out.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
Well, I like that. Good for you.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
You might be appalled mine goes up like the first
weekend of November.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
Oh my gosh, I'm not appalled. Look, it's a beautiful
time of year. Why not have I get up early
in the morning and make my coffee and like journal
and do my little stuff before the kids get up.
When it's Christmas time and that tree is lit up
and that's the only light in the room, and the
and the sun hasn't risen yet. Love it so much,
(32:11):
I would want it all year. I mean, I get it.
I get a November first, I get it.
Speaker 1 (32:15):
Yeah, it's a magical time. We want we want to
celebrate it as long as we can. And you are
magical because you've been so open and real during this interview,
which I always so appreciate. I love bringing on fan
favorite artists who get to show people who they are
and not the characters. Right, It's it's all about who
you are as a human. And Sarah the name of
(32:37):
the show, as I've never said this before, and I
wrap every interview with the question based off the title
of my show. So I'm wondering, is there anything today
that you can think of that you've never said before
that you want to share whatever it means to you.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
Yes, I've been thinking about this question, Tommy. I watched
Inside Out Too several weeks ago. My son and bought
it for us on Amazon as a birthday gift. He
used his money to buy it so that we could
all watch it together because I'm dying to see it
and we hadn't been together, and I wanted to watch
it together. I wept my way through that whole movie,
(33:13):
like died. It was so intense and so beautiful. So
here's the thing I've never said before is that since
that movie, which I think was so illuminating and so brilliant,
I now talk to my emotions in my head as
if they're the little characters. I go, anxiety, honey, you
can go sit down. You don't need to be here
(33:36):
at the steering wheel. I'm okay, and I can let
Joy take the wheel again. You can go sit in
your chair and you can have a little massage and
you can relax. I know you're being vigilant and you're
trying to keep me safe. I have a lot of anxiety.
That is that's my I've talked a little bit about this,
but not like it's it's I have a lot of anxiety,
and it'll wake me up in the middle of the night.
(33:56):
It'll wake me up. And the spin, spin, spin, spin, spin,
and having a visual of there are all these emotions
that exist inside of me that aren't the totality of me,
and they're there to in some way care for me
and keep me safe. Having the language and the visual
(34:20):
of this sweet movie that was so genius to kind
of look and speak to the emotion directly and say
it's okay, you can sit down. Joy, can you come please? Joy,
please come, please come take the wheel again. It's such
a gift to me. I'm watching it's language that my
daughter has now too. My anxiety is at the wheel again. Mom. Okay,
(34:45):
you can tell her to sit down. So yeah, that's
my I know, talk to voices in my head.
Speaker 1 (34:52):
You know what, though, good for you because it's such
a good way to check yourself right and and really
honor what you're feeling. And I think that's something that's
a really important message to put out there. It's not
just the brushings aside or act like it doesn't exist,
or you're you know, oh, I'm just being silly. I'm
not anxious, or I'm not sad, or I'm not angry. No, like,
honor it, acknowledge it.
Speaker 3 (35:12):
There she is. Yeah, yeah, And I think that often also,
anxiety is with me so much that I forget that
what I'm feeling is anxiety, you know, but actually being
able to stop and go, ah, you're doing that thing
again where you're imagining all the worst case scenarios and
(35:35):
playing them all out and trying to figure out if
you'll be prepared for all of them. Like, that's anxiety,
and anxiety is right now stealing my joy. So I'm
such a visual person and have always been a visual person.
So having the image of that sweet little character, like,
I'm trying really hard to keep you safe, to.
Speaker 1 (35:57):
Be like you're okay.
Speaker 3 (35:58):
I know you are, and I love you, but you
can go over here. I don't need you. I just
think that it clicks me into health faster. It gets
me back into the driver's seat faster, And I applaud
the creators and the writers and Pixar for making something
that's so beautiful and helpful.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
Yeah, it allows people, especially younger kids, to feel okay
talking about emotions, which you know, we all grew up differently.
I come from a very old school Italian family. It
wasn't something I grew up really doing. So it's nice
to be able to have that space and see through
Disney that like, oh my god, it's okay to do that.
So I'm totally with you, Sarah. What a treat to
(36:41):
hang out and to talk with you every time. I
know it's been a few years since we last saw
each other, but I feel like we jump right back
in and I always always love our conversations.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Me too. It is so sweet.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
Thank you for coming on your new show. Mistletoe Murders
is out and every week and new episode drops, so
everybody go watch it, watch it again, have those pajama
parties with cocktails and breakfast for dinner, foods and all.
Speaker 3 (37:08):
The things right, yes, all the things.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
Thank you, my friend.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
I'm wishing you a great holiday season and congratulations on
all your success.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
Thank you so much, Tommy.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
I've Never Said This Before is hosted by me, Tommy Dedario.
This podcast is executive produced by Andrew Piglisi at iHeartRadio
and by me Tommy, with editing by Joshua Colaudney. I've
Never Said This Before is part of the Elvis Duran
podcast Network on iHeart Podcasts.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
For more rate review.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
And subscribe to our show and if you liked this episode,
tell your friends. Until next time, I'm Tommy Dedario
Elvis Duran and the Morning Show ON DEMAND News
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations.
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show. Clay Travis and Buck Sexton tackle the biggest stories in news, politics and current events with intelligence and humor. From the border crisis, to the madness of cancel culture and far-left missteps, Clay and Buck guide listeners through the latest headlines and hot topics with fun and entertaining conversations and opinions.