Marriage Rules with Beth Wylie

Marriage Rules with Beth Wylie

Beth Wylie is a therapist who has been working and helping couples for over a decade. Beth brings humor to her sessions in her office and will bring that into this podcast as well. Get ready to learn something in every episode, to have many A Ha moments, and get ready to yell, "ear muffs kids"...sorry, I am a sailor. My goal is to help couples have more intentional relationships. I find couples are living a version of life that they really do not want. Yet, they feel stuck and feel as if there is no other way. I am here to share that, there is in fact another way to live within your relationship! You can have fun, have conflict and have great sex all in the same marriage. If you walk away learning how to show up better in your relationship while becoming more aware of your own self, triggers and all, then I feel as if I did my job.

Episodes

Episode 19: Let's Talk About Sex.

October 12, 2022 • 15 mins
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Episode 18: Why we need to keep dating our spouse.

October 12, 2022 • 14 mins
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Episode 17: Rituals of connection or rituals of disconnection.

October 6, 2022 • 12 mins
Click the link below to purchase my online course. Just starting the course is creating rituals of connection and then as you continue to work on the course, you can bring intentionality to how you want to add rituals of connection to your relationship. https://marriage-therapy.teachable.com/
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Episode 16: Keep it Moving

October 6, 2022 • 14 mins
Charlie and I narrowly avoid many conflicts throughout the day. I often can't remember examples, but one happened yesterday and I needed to share it with you all.Here a few reasons we were able to avoid this conflict and were able to Keep It Moving are:1. Having a full emotional bank account2. Being intentional with where we moved (the why = less stress)3. Creating an intentional time to connect each week4. Self awareness ...
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Episode 15: The roommate syndrome roadmap. Ways to avoid it altogether or how to live through it intentionally.

September 30, 2022 • 14 mins
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Episode 14: Intentional Vacation (logistical edition)

September 29, 2022 • 14 mins
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Episode 13: Get The Color

September 27, 2022 • 11 mins
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Episode 12: Identifying your character defects

September 27, 2022 • 23 mins
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Episode 11: Intentional Vacations (couples edition)

September 26, 2022 • 21 mins
Have you ever gone on a long waited for vacation with your partner full of expectations of intimacy and quality time only to find yourself watching the sunset alone or sitting in silence at a very fancy, very expensive dinner? It happens, A LOT. I hear about it in sessions once a couple has returned. So much disappointment, and so much time and money that was wasted because couples were not intentional, realistic or comm...
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Episode 10: Everything you knew about conflict should be called into question.

September 23, 2022 • 25 mins
What is your belief system when it comes to conflict? Where did you learn this belief system? How did it come to be formed into this belief system? So much of what was modeled for us by our primary attachment figures, was a conflict style that was ineffective, harmful and was likely also formed by the community in which you grew up in. We believe that in conflict, there is a winner and a loser, in debate teams, the winner...
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Episode 9: Validation is a game changer!

September 20, 2022 • 12 mins
"I just want to feel heard and understood." Have those words ever come out of your mouth? Well, I have heard them many times and I have watched as couples struggle to validate one another's perspective and feelings. I have heard every excuse as to why they just can not validate their partner's reality. I have watched as one couple held their breath waiting for validation, only to be left feeling dismissed and minimized. Th...
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Episode 8: The Front Load

September 20, 2022 • 11 mins
In my training with the Gottman Institute, I learned how to help couples bring up an issue softly. I feel (insert feeling) about (what is the issue) and I need(what would you like to change or happen). While this is totally cool, adding some positive context before you even bring up your complaint. Have a listen to hear me drop a pretty varsity level front load during this episode. Enjoy! If you like what you hear and thi...
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Episode 7: The Invitation to a Conversation

September 20, 2022 • 15 mins
Ok, so I need you to really listen to me here. If you have something important and/or hard that you need to talk to your partner about, you absolutely need to invite them to a conversation instead of just starting up a that conversation. If we side swipe, we usually elicit a defensive response and we end up in a process oriented fight (we fight over how we fight), and that, is a GIANT waste of time! When we invite our part...
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Episode 6: Meditation and the amygdala

September 15, 2022 • 14 mins
Create a meditation practice in order to be aware of how you are feeling when you are feeling it, to be able to slow down your reaction to an event and to create a more positive thought process in your life and in your relationship. Have a listen while Beth breaks it down. If you like what you hear and think you could benefit from my online course for couples, then click here! https://marriage-therapy.teachable.com/  ...
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Episode 5: The "mom shoulder"

September 14, 2022 • 12 mins
Affection for the safe of affection is pretty rare in married couples who have kids. AND that creates a lot of disconnection and assumptions that could be cleared up by: 1. Listen to this episode 2. Talk to your partner about this episode 3. Make a goal with an intention and some action steps to work on creating more moments of affection for the sake of affection. If you like what you hear and think you could benefit f...
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Episode 4: Remove distractions to create more rituals of connection.

September 14, 2022 • 73 mins
The more opportunities we create for potential positive connections, the more positive connections we have. Distractions tend to steal those opportunities, and we fall prey to the habits we create around these distractions. Pay attention to the amount of distraction you currently have in your life, and how often you tend to add more to the plate. Do you know what you might be afraid of if you did not have your go to distr...
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Episode 3: Call it back.

September 14, 2022 • 9 mins
My favorite tool to share with clients is the call it back tool. When you bring up a complaint in a harsh way, or you have a certain negative tone of voice or you just start a conversation with your partner with negative vibes, then I want you to call it back. This is done by being aware of how you just started this interaction and checking in to see if you are actually upset at your partner or if you are being lazy in you...
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Episode 2: Why didn't you do the dishes?

September 13, 2022 • 9 mins
We tend to ask why questions to our partner instead of making an I feel statement. When we ask a why question, we are literally asking our partner to explain themselves....aka be defensive. Once that happens then the conflict has become process oriented (fighting about how you fight) and the complaint, feeling, issue never saw the light of day. Listen to the podcast and hear Beth talk about the different tools to use inst...
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Intentionally creating a more positive relationship.

September 12, 2022 • 19 mins
I am a pretty big Sublime fan, so I often think of PMA - positive mental attitude when I think about bids to connect, emotional bank account, deposits and the positive perspective. The PMA idea is that if you think positive thoughts and keep your thoughts in a more positive direction, then overall your life will be positive. Not because you life got better, but because you thought about it more positively, you life felt mo...
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Transition to Parenthood, the reconnection edition

July 28, 2020 • 23 mins
In this episode I talk about how to stop roommate syndrome from entering your relationship or how to avoid entering into it. There is a time in your relationship when your children are at a certain age that you have a pivotal decision to make. I talk about how to be intentional with how you as a couple spend your time and prioritize your relationship, yes even over your kids. Have a listen and feel free to message me with ...
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