After the Revolution: Chapters Twenty One, Twenty Two, and Twenty Three

Episode Transcript
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(01:58):
Seat brought to you by the nat is no Highway
Traffic Safety Administration. In the ad Council, Chapter twenty one.
Sasha Alexander hadn't seen it coming. He hadn't expected her
at all. The sound of his furious scream was the
most beautiful thing Sasha had ever heard. She hit him
again and again, and he fell back and then down

(02:19):
to the ground. Blood streamed from his nose in a
gash above his brow. His eyes looked unfocused, his lip
was split. He tried to scream or cry out or
beg her, but she didn't give him the time to
say one damn word. Instead, she hit him again and
again and again. She didn't make the conscious choice to
dive down on top of him, and in fact, Sasha
was rather surprised to find herself straddling the prone, broken

(02:42):
boy soldier. But once she was there, she kept hitting
him until she felt his skull give way and the
helmet had something soft, squishy and hot that lay beyond.
She sat back and for what seemed like a year,
just stared at the helmet and bedded in Alexander's ruined face.
Blood pulsed out from around the edges where it met
the skin. The way the blood bubbled up looked just

(03:02):
a bit like the water and one of the fountains
outside the hospital her mother ran. For some reason, that
similarity did more to raise her hackles than the act
of killing her. Ears still rang, and so it was
easy to lose herself. In contemplation of Alexander's body. Her
mind turned to the Book of John and the words
of her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, Do not be
like Kine who belonged to the evil One and murdered

(03:24):
his brother? And why did he murder him? Because his
own actions were evil and his brothers were righteous? Had
Alexander's actions truly been righteous? Sasha knew if she searched
the Bible she could find scriptural justifications for everything Alexander
had done. That's why she'd come here in the first place,
wasn't it The heavenly Kingdom was finally going back to

(03:44):
the letter of the Bible, the word of God. Only
now that she had seen what that looked like, Sasha
had found she could not abide it. Am I still
a Christian? She couldn't say. Her faith had been such
a part of her identity. It had been everything, And
now it felt like a Hi. What am I if
not a righteous servant of the Lord? Where do I
go from? Here? Eisash little problem? Here? Roland's voice jerked

(04:09):
her out of her contemplation. She looked back at the man,
and her mind recoiled in terror. His skin had been
shredded by gunfire. It hung in pale tatters down his
face and arms. His clothing had largely been shot away,
and The rags that remained were so drenched in blood
that they clung to him. He looked almost as if
he was clad in a single giant scab. One of
his eyes was unfocused, dislocated, and something had happened to

(04:31):
his left arm. It looked as if an enormous straight
razor had burst out of the forearm. Where did you
get that? She asked. Sasha was surprised and a bit
disturbed by her curiosity. Roland seemed surprised too this. He
looked at the blade. I really no, had sort of
forgotten it was in there. He lifted his arm and
its blood soaked blade up and looked at it like

(04:52):
a small child opening a prized gift on Christmas morning.
Then he flicked his arm down towards the ground, and
the blade slid back into the meat of his forearm
with a wet thwack look. He said, we got more
present ship to deal with right now. You're all those sirens.
She actually couldn't. Her hearing had begun to recover from
the gunfight, but Roland was just barely audible allowed tonight,

(05:14):
as hums still rang through her ears. Sasha was pretty
sure she'd suffered permanent damage. I can't hear much right now,
she said, the gun of fire, you know. Oh, he frowned.
I forgot that can happen to you folks. Well, uh,
there's a shipload of cops or martyrs or militia whatever.
A bunch of them are coming, probably two or three hundred.
They got tanks and drones and ship. God Almighty, Sasha

(05:35):
felt fear rise up in her heart again. Yeah, listen,
God's not really the dude to worry about right now.
Manny's all fucked up. I stopped his bleeding, but you're
gonna need to get him out of here. Manny, she'd
forgotten all about him. Sasha realized with a start that
she'd blotted the rest of the room from her mind.
She looked around and took it all in. Manny was
still lying where she'd left him, nursing a gunshot wound

(05:56):
to the belly. He was pale, sweaty, and he looked
to be in terrible pain. But he was conscious and alive.
That was more than she could say for Marigold. The
poor woman had been shredded by shotgun fire. Sasha couldn't
bring herself to look too closely at the shattered steaming remains,
but Marigold's friends were alive. The young man Rick was
unconscious and drenched in blood, but most of that blood

(06:18):
didn't seem to be his own. His head was in
Tullie's lap. She'd been wounded in the buttocks and bled
quite a lot, but the wounds seemed to have clotted.
There were tears and a haunted, pained look in her eyes.
Oh my god, Sasha said, once her mind started to
process the visual stimuli. Lord in Heaven, No, no, no, no,
that poor woman, that unborn child. How could this happen?

(06:39):
How could this be? Sasha? Roland shouted, This is a
very bad time for you to have emotions. Try killing
those for a while. How just think about the fact
that every one but me will die if he don't
get your ship together? And then get your ship together.
Her initial action was anger and frustration. Is he that
disconnected from humanity? Does he think people can just turn
their empathy off? Off? But then she stopped herself, listened

(07:02):
to him, and tried. She imagined herself putting on a
heavy jacket, something that blocked out pain and horror rather
than the cold. It worked, Okay, she said, what do
I need? To do. You need to take Monny and uh,
what's her name and what's his face? Touli and Rick right,
take the non dead people, run down and out the

(07:23):
back door and find me a car. Then you need
to a car. He stopped sifting through the dead men's
firearms to roll his eyes at her. Yes, a car.
I'm not going to carry all you lame bloods out
of here on my fucking shoulders. Were need a getaway vehicle.
I can't drive, she said. All the cars in the
am fete are autonomous. He shrugged, you'll figure it out.
Many moans just then, almost as if it was in

(07:44):
response to Roland's suggestion. Sasha knew it was more likely
she'd just been too focused on the big post human
to notice Manny's pained moans the whole time. Can he drive?
Sasha asked, sure, Roland said, with sudden cheer, He's only
lost what two quarts of blood? I gave him a
little mine. I'm sure be right his rain soon. Manny
moaned again, handed his blood soaked belly. He didn't appear

(08:05):
to be bleeding still, but he was pale, and his
face showed agony, too obvious to ignore, Sasha doubted he'd
be capable of driving a car in the immediate future.
I can drive, Tuli said, in a cracked, broken sounding voice.
Right Roland said, well, that's lovely. Get your asses up
and get moving. You've got about two minutes before ship
and fans start their lovely dance. The post humans good

(08:27):
humor was incongruous in this blood soaked room. Addressed to
two people who lost a friend today, he grabbed one
of the guard's pistols, which he shoved in his waistband
and handed it to Sasha. Safeties off, he said, cheerily,
So once you pull the trigger, stuff will happen. Sasha
took the gun and then went over to help Manny up.
Tually did the same thing with her wounded friend. Neither

(08:48):
Manny or Rick were in great shape, but Manny at
least seemed capable of standing under his own power. Once
Sasha got him to his feet, he stayed there. She
looked him in the eye, and while he seemed sort
of dazed and glassy, his pupils fixed on hers, and
he nodded. We have to go. She said, sitrat the tempoima.
He muttered what Sasha asked, said, it's about fucking time.

(09:12):
Just follow me, she said, with more confidence than she felt.
I'll take care of everything. Oh funck that, Manny said.
He put a hand on her shoulder and moved as
if to push in front of her and shield her
with his body. Then he grabbed a side, groaned, and
staggered back. All right, yeah, you lead the way men.
Tuli was up now. She had an arm around her friend,

(09:33):
and together they moved almost as fast as a single
elderly person with bad hips. Manny was not much more mobile.
Sasha looked back at Roland. Where should we meet you?
The next street behind this building is called Alma. Take
it and go left until you hit a road named
Cross Bend. I should be there by the time you arrive.
What if we can't find up, he cut her off.

(09:53):
Not finding a car is not an option. Talking more
is not an option. I have to go kill people.
You find something with wheels. Get Tullie in the driver's seat.
Sasha started to say something, but the sirens had drawn
very close. Indeed, she heard several shouts from outside the
front of the building. Roland cursed. He'd already gathered up
two of the rifles and slung them across his back.

(10:13):
He had a large pistol in his left hand. At
the sound of the shouting, he brought his right hand
up to his belly and dug it deep inside his skin.
Sasha watched in horror as he tore a heavy, blood
caked weapon out of his gut. Roland walked up to
the front window of the room and fired the weapon once, twice,
three times. Its report was deep and bassy, like the
sound of a heavy drum being struck. There was a

(10:34):
brief island of quiet, followed by a trio of explosions
that rattled the walls of the jail. Look. Roland said
as he glanced back to her, I gotta go be
a distraction. Find the car, get to cross bend in Alma,
I'll be therein He glanced out the window again and shrugged.
Ten maybe eleven minutes, okay should? Sasha started to ask
talking time is done. Toullie's flat voice interrupted, He moves,

(10:58):
We move now. She pulled her friend towards the door.
There would have been something almost comical about the agonizing
slowness with which they actually moved, but the gesture had
its intended effect. Sasha took Manny by the hand. She
let Tully lead the way to the door, but once
they were in the hallway, the young woman had no
idea where to go. Sasha took the lead then and

(11:18):
guided her new comrades towards a flashing red exit sign
that she knew led to a rear stairwell. For a
brief passing second, she'd been worried that they might encounter
other guards or jailers during their flight. That concern proved groundless.
Gunfire had torn through the walls of the examination room
and ripped apart the interior of the jail. She saw
a few gouts of blood by the walls, and one

(11:38):
sinister looking pool of it beneath a desk. It all
drove an important lesson home for Sasha. Bullets don't stop
when they miss. The stairwell was as deserted as the
rest of the jail. They hoppled down at as quickly
as three wounded people could manage. Sasha stayed in the back,
under the instinctive assumption that it'd be best for morale
if she didn't rush ahead. Their progress down the stairs

(11:59):
was painfully slow, almost every step punctuated by the sound
of gunfire out on the street. Below. It sounded like
a full scale war had broken out there. There was
a lot of screaming, and Sasha tried not to think
too much about which of the nice young martyrs she'd
met in the square were now dying by Roland's hand.
What about Anne, what about Susannah? You're abandoning them? Sasha
shook the thoughts clear from her head. There'd be time

(12:22):
for self loathing later. Tulli and Rick reached the bottom
floor first. They leaned back against the wall together and
caught their breath. Rick was as white as a sheet
and looked like he could still barely stand. Tullie was
doing better, but not by a wide margin. When she
and Manny hit the bottom floor, he went straight for
the exit door. He clearly intended to be the first
out in case anyone had a weapon trained on the door.

(12:45):
Sasha stopped him. That wasn't hard, because he was only
a little more stable than Tulli. She pushed him back,
put a hand on the door, and then drew the
pistol Roland had given her. She fixed Manny with what
she hoped was a firm, fearless look. You're in no
state to be heroic, he looked, to her as if
he wanted to fight her, But then he looked down
at the shaking hand he had pressed into the sopping
wound in his side. Yeah, all right, you down to

(13:07):
do the hero stuff. Then she nodded, well, then be
my guest. Sasha didn't know how to use a gun.
The m FED band almost all private firearm ownership. Her
grandfather had owned a couple of bolt action hunting rifles,
and he'd let Sasha hold them a few times. That
was as close as she'd gotten to firearms training. She'd
never actually shot the darn things. Once he died, her

(13:29):
father had sold the guns rather than deal with the
hassle and expense of a license. So she burst out
onto the street with the pistol held high in front
of her, like she'd seen in movies. It took her
a few seconds to realize, sheepishly, that this behavior was
more likely to get her gun down than aid in
her defense. Thankfully, there'd been no martyrs watching the rear exit.
Sasha waved for the others to follow her out and

(13:50):
stashed the pistol under her shirt. For a few minutes,
they'd ran, or rather hobbled, in what seemed like the
right direction. The city still rang with the sound of sirens, unfire,
and the occasional concussive blast, but it seemed to be
moving away from them. Plano wasn't exactly crowded, but there
were enough people out on the street to notice the
fresh wounds on Tulli, Rick, and Manny. No one approached them,

(14:12):
though Sasha wasn't sure if they passed unnoticed, but they
were able to pass through the city without incident. Fear
and the flight reflex were enough to carry them a
few blocks in relative haste. Once they were out of
sight of the jail. Rick put up a hand as
he slumped back against the wall. Tulli continued to hold
him up. She was pale, sweaty, and pained looking. Ryan
shook and shuddered. His eyes were unfocused and he was

(14:34):
clearly in shock. He needs to rest, Tulli said. Manny
stopped next to them and leaned against the wall as well.
He dodded at Tulli and then looked back to Sasha. Yeah,
dit oh, I might prefer to lay down a die
at this point. We need to find a car anyway,
Tullie said, as she helped lower Rick down to sit
against the wall. If I carry him for much longer,

(14:55):
I'm going to drop. Sasha realized everyone was looking at her.
Is that my job? Manny looked mortified, Tulie looked angry.
Rick bless Him, was too deep and shocked to react. Yes,
Tullie said, in a toneless voice that still somehow implied
deep disappointment. Okay, then Sasha said, when I find the car,

(15:16):
I assume you'll know how to hot wire it. Tullie laughed.
It wasn't a nice laugh. If you're hiding a real
nice deck somewhere in that's silly head of yours. Or
you find a car that's older than my dad. Maybe
otherwise we're going to need something with keys in it.
What so I'm just supposed to carjack someone. Tullie stared
dead eyed at her. Manny gave a pained, helpful smile.

(15:39):
I mean you've got a gun, he said. Sasha felt
the heat rise in her again. Why not, I've given
up every other principle I have to day, I might
as well commit armed robbery, the guilt staying her guts,
but not as badly as it should have. Perhaps she
was still numb from watching Doctor Brandton. Marigold die. Or
maybe it's because I killed Alexander. Maybe I'm evil now

(15:59):
and this is what that feels like. There was no
time to mold the possibilities. Sasha left Manny and the
others to catch their breath and darted down an alley
towards a larger street that sounded like it might have traffic.
She passed two parked cars and looked inside with a
vain hope that, just maybe someone might have left their
keys behind. It was to no avail. Sasha soon found
herself on the cracked and shell popped asphalt of Alma Road.

(16:22):
The buildings on either side of this stretch of street
had taken significant damage during the Heavenly Kingdom's birth Pains.
There were no people out on the sidewalks or visible
in the windows. Anyone alive had probably hunkered down to
avoid the shooting. There was still traffic on the road, though,
three trucks in a dented, fume spewing white sedan shot
by her at the speed of wartime traffic. Sasha drew

(16:44):
her gun, looked at it, and then hurriedly stashed it
inside her blouse again. When she realized how dumb that
had been, Godly women do not carry guns. A series
of four loud booms sounded in the distance. Sasha didn't
know enough about weaponry to guess what those had been,
but she knew they'd had something to do with Roland.
People are dying, so I can find us a car
and get everyone to safety. She started walking down the street,

(17:07):
face pointed towards oncoming traffic, hands waving above her head
in the international gesture for oh God, please help me.
Two more cars zoomed past without even slowing to check
on her. It was odd how that shocked her after
everything else she'd seen in the Heavenly Kingdom. The faithful
protect and support each other, Pastor Mike had claimed, But not,
it seemed, when a half human monster was on a

(17:28):
rampage through their city. That helped debate her guilt at least,
or it did right up until the moment a familiar
Jankie brown truck rumbled to a stop next to her.
Excuse me, ma'am, do you need She turned around, and
the man's face lit up in surprise, Miss Sasha. It
was Darryll, the kindly old foreman who driven her to
the House of Miriam on her first day in the Kingdom?

(17:49):
Was that really only days ago? It seemed like years.
Sasha felt like an old woman, even though she was
just on the edge of eighteen. You hurt? He slammed
the car into park and open his door one sec
I got a first aid kit in the back. Where'd
you get hit? Sasha looked down at her chest and
realized she looked like she'd been badly injured. The blood
wasn't hers, of course, but Darrell couldn't have known that.

(18:11):
He thought she was hurt and he was trying to help.
Am I really going to rob a good Samaritan? She was?
Sasha waited until Darrel had closed the door, grabbed his
medical kit, and turned towards her. Then she drew her
pistol and leveled it at his weathered, grease stained, and
now thoroughly surprised face. Huh, I need your truck. I
need your truck, she said. Darrell dropped the medical kit

(18:34):
and put both his palms out. Oh now, girl, all right,
why don't you just put that gun down. Darrel ain't
gonna hurt you. I'll take you anywhere you need to go.
Let's just be real, calm, real slow about all this.
Did somebody hurt you. I need your truck. It was
so hard to keep her voice, even, so hard to
do this cruel thing to a man who'd only been
kind to her. Sasha could feel white hot tears streamed

(18:55):
down her face. I must look like a crazy person,
she thought. Maybe that will help now, Miss Sasha, Darrell said,
I'm a guess. You don't know how to drive a truck.
Mine ain't autonomous, it's old stick shift. Please, why don't
you let me take you where you need to go?
Sasha's mind raced. It was the same species of nervousness
that had always gripped her during major exams in college

(19:16):
admissions essays. She ran through and discarded a dozen different
courses of action in her head. What if he won't
give me the keys, What if he takes another step forward?
What if he moved? It started with a single glance.
Darrell's eyes darted towards the driver's side door of his truck.
She almost didn't catch it, but for whatever reason, the
gesture rose goose pimples on the back of her neck

(19:36):
and forearms. I need your truck. Her voice was cold, strong, firm.
Darrell nodded at her, his body posture stayed the same,
but his eyes changed. There was something hard and haunted
in them. Now, all right, miss Sasha, I'm just gonna
reach in here for m keys. He took a step
back and moved towards the door. The bottom fell out

(19:58):
of Sasha's gut, and she screw aimed at him to stop,
don't make another move. He dove for the door, pulled
it open, and reached a hand down beside the driver's seat.
Sasha saw a flash of metal in his hand, and
she opened fire. She wasn't sure how many times she
pulled the trigger, but soon the gun was empty. Sasha
watched as Darrell stumble back into the truck and then
slid to the ground. Most of her shots had gone wide,

(20:20):
very wide. She'd chattered two of the truck's windows and
put four or five rounds into the vehicle's body, but
at least one had hit Darrell right in his throat,
a kill shot. He slumped to the ground, gagged on blood,
and jerked like an electrified marionette. Part of her wanted
to run to him, to hold him while he died
and say she was sorry. Then she saw the gun
at his feet. It didn't dissipate her guilt. After all,

(20:42):
she drawn on him first, but at least she hadn't
shot and killed an unarmed man. She'd killed an armed man,
an armed man who only ever helped me. Sasha slumped
against the hood of the truck and lost herself in
a storm of sobs. She didn't realize she dropped her
gun until it hit the asphalt with a dull clank.
She couldn't control her hands or her breathing. Her frantic

(21:03):
sobbing had robbed all the air from her lungs. Her
legs weakened, and she started to stumble to the ground
when a pair of warm, semi strong arms caught her
from behind. Hey, Hey, it's all right, it's all right, Manny,
it's ok. You're gonna be ok. Her world went black
for a little while. Sasha felt Manny lift her up,
heard the sound of the truck's engine rumble back to life.

(21:24):
But she couldn't see, and she couldn't move, and she
couldn't stop crying. Time lost any sort of meaning. When
she came back to herself, there were in motion. Manny
sat next to her, and Rick next to him, tully drove.
Sasha's eyes were drawn to Manny. He held Darrell's pistol
in his left hand. She couldn't help but stare at
the four spots of dried blood on the silver slide.

(21:45):
You all right, Sasha, Manny asked. His question passed through
her ears without hitting her mind. Sasha couldn't stop staring
at Darrell's blood. I did that. I ended him. She'd
ended two men to day. She felt no guilt about Alexander,
but that was almost more disturbing. It seemed impossible that
she had been a pampered suburban girl less than a
month ago. Now she was a murderer. Whoever sheds human

(22:08):
blood by humans, shall their blood be shed? Sasha felt
as if a thick cloud of doom had fallen on
her shoulders. The truck veered off to the right and
slammed to a sudden stop. Sasha was flung forward into
the back of Tullie seat. A trio of vehicles zoomed
past them, speeding in the opposite direction, like several bats
fleeing the same hell. Sasha realized, with a moment's focus,

(22:30):
that there was an awful lot of traffic heading away
from them as fast as possible, promp Tullie cursed and
fought with a stick shift. The truck lurched forward again
and made it back onto the road for a few seconds.
Then another speeding car roared into the oncoming lane, and
she was forced to veer off to the shoulder again.
The sounds of gunfire grew louder. Sasha heard the thrumb

(22:50):
of helicopter blades too, a second before one buzzed right
over their heads. It looked like a military vehicle, painted
matt black and laden with weapons. Sasha watched as zoomed
ahead and rose up over a pair of high rise
apartment buildings near the horizon line. There was a loud
crump sound, and black smoke billowed out from the side
of the craft. It spun around drunkenly in the air

(23:11):
for one very long second before slamming into the roof
of one of the high rises. The resultant blast rocked
the truck. Two Lee veered left and right around a
pothole at another speeding truck, respectively. Her knuckles were white,
her jaw was clinched. Sasha could see Tulie's eyes in
the rear view mirror. She looked terrified and angry at
the same time, Rick moaned in pain with every shake

(23:31):
and jostle. Manny closed his eyes, shook his head, and
muttered something low under his breath. Are we close, Sasha
asked Manny. He squinted and looked out at the road
for a second. I mean, he shrugged. Yeah, probably, I'm
gonna guess. Rollands close to the explosions and also causing them.
Smoke now dominated the horizon, which grew less horizony and

(23:51):
more imminent with each passing second. In spite of all that,
Sasha's eyes kept being drawn back to the gun in
Manny's hand and the dry red brown stains on the
slide that was a good man's blood. She thought, how
did it come to this? Hey, Jesus girl, it was Tuli.
Sasha looked up to the rear view mirror and locked
eyes with the other woman. But the funk up Chica,

(24:13):
Tuli said. For the first time, Sasha heard real anger
and not just cold indifference in her voice. The other
woman continued, My best friend was just shot to pieces,
My lover is bleeding out, and you're all fucked up
because you've gunned down some crystal fascist ship fuck Suck
your heart into your guts. I don't know where you
came from, girl, but you're in a hardass part of
the world. Now it's time to fortify. Fortify. Sasha held

(24:38):
onto that word like a life preserver. Fortify survive. Then
you can lose your head in tears and shame. Okay,
she nodded. She started to apologize, but was interrupted when
the truck screeched to another's sudden halt and threw everyone forward.
Sasha's head hit the front seat again, and her world
dissolved into stars. Ship. Tulie cried something rammed the rear

(24:59):
of the truck. Sasha lost all orientation to reality. When
her head and eyes cleared, the first thing she saw
was Tullie nursing a broken nose. Blood poured down the
other woman's face. Many seemed intact. Sasha looked behind them
and saw a small sedan had dashed itself against the
bed of their truck. It must have been following right
behind when Tullie hit the brakes. Sasha swung her eyes

(25:20):
front to see why they'd stopped. She saw Rowland. He
stood maybe ten feet in front of the truck's hood.
That arm raiser of his was extended again, but the
blade was cracked and half shattered. His other hand held
some sort of large, black assault rifle he hadn't been
carrying in the jail. The pistol grip grenade launcher he'd
been carrying was still with him, but he'd holstered it

(25:40):
in an open hole in his belly. The left side
of his cheek had been ripped away. Most of his
hair was burnt off, and Sasha made out at least
one clear bullet hole in his forehead. There might have
been more. All the caked on blood and gore made
it hard to discern. His clothing had been mostly shot, burned,
or torn away. The dominant colors on his body were
black and red, with a few horrible spots of white

(26:01):
where bones shone through. In the open air, the city
behind him was all smoke and fire. Emergency lights from
several vehicles blinked madly in the miasthma, but there were
no martyrs or emergency workers visible, at least none that
were standing. Sasha saw several terribly still bodies lying among
the piles of rubble. Roland staggered towards the truck and

(26:21):
flung the passenger's side door open. He slumped into the
seat bringing with him an overpowering stink of blood and fire.
He leaned back in his seat and took three long breaths,
and then he spoke, way, heads pretty clear, but you
might want to hang a right and then take a
left avoid the traffic. Truly nodded, and the truck jerked
forward again. The riot out was so easy it scared Sasha.

(26:46):
In fact, it seemed to scare everyone but Roland. Manny's
knuckles grew whider and wider as they navigated their way
out of the old Metroplex. Toulli's expression didn't change, but
her body shook with nervous energy, and her jaw was
set so tight that the veins on her neck bulged
from the strain. It was a mercy that Rick was
unconscious by that point. Convoys of military vehicles rolled past them,

(27:07):
sometimes escorting ambulances and other emergency vehicles, sometimes bringing more
soldiers to the chunk of the city. Roland had devastated
Sasha's heart leapt into her throat every single time, but
somehow no one stopped their truck. Roland assured them all
that it would be fine. I kicked their asses so
hard it'll take him an hour to find their cheeks.
His only discomfort came once they left the zone of

(27:28):
active danger. He seemed to deflate. Then, after a half
hour on the road, his wounds had mostly healed. The
new skin that grew back underneath seemed weirdly dark compared
to the skin above it. Roland scratched at it an irritation,
and then as casually as if he'd been tossing an
apple core, he ripped off his face in one smooth
emotion and tossed the bloody skin out the window. Jesus, dude,

(27:51):
Manny said, disgusted. Couldn't you have waited until we weren't
all in the car? Sasha stared in shock. Her hands
started to tremble, and she felt the eared to vomit,
but she fought it down and forced her stomach to
an uneasy calm. You've seen worse than this now, and
that was true. She looked back at Rowland and forced
herself to take in his new face, which she guessed

(28:12):
was really his old face. Neither iteration of him had
been exactly handsome. She watched in queasy fascination as he
picked the rest of the white skin from his hands
and tossed it out the window. When he'd finished, he
glanced up at Sasha. What he asked, Please tell me
you're not a racist. This would be a real bad
time for you to be racist. She's not racist, dude.

(28:33):
Manny said, you just ripped your skin off. That freaks
people out. Oh, said Rowland, right, Sorry, it's okay, She said,
this is just my first time seeing someone rip off
their own skin. First. Roland grunted, but probably not last.
Sasha didn't have the guts to question him, so she
kept quiet for the rest of the ride, so did

(28:54):
most of the other passengers. For a long time, the
only sounds inside the truck were Rick's unconscious moan and
Rowland's occasional directions to Tulli. He led them through underpopulated
neighborhoods and around checkpoints, past blackened buildings and wrecks of
military vehicles destroyed during the Heavenly Kingdom's first Great advance.
Sasha was surprised at the emptiness of most of the city.

(29:14):
She began to understand why Manny called this place Sioda
di Muerta. It took them two hours to escape the
city sprawl and finally make their way out onto the
open plains. They avoided the main highway that linked Dallas
to Waco. Instead spider webbed their way across a series
of farm roads. Every few minutes they'd rolled past the
bones of a rural town. Every town out here seemed abandoned,

(29:36):
as dead and dry as the acres of yellow grass
that swallowed them up. A little before dark, they rolled
over a decrepit bridge across a dry river bed. A
bullet riddled sign identified this area as Basqui County. Rowland
put a hand on Manny's shoulder and pointed towards a
big metal barn on the horizon. Take us up there.
We should probably stop for the night. What Tullie spoke up?

(29:59):
Why we could be at rolling fuck in an hour?
Roland shook his head. We got two routes back to
the city. Either we find the main highway and deal
with Kingdom patrols, or we keep ride in these country roads.
That'll take at least another two or three hours and
a lot of time off road in the dark. There's
no better recipe for cracking an axle or blowing at tire.
Tuly fumed, but she rolled the truck up and through

(30:21):
a gap in what had once been the fence line
of a farm. There were a lot of farmhouses around them,
stretched out across acres and acres of fields and pecan orchards.
They all looked abandoned, devoid of light, half reclaimed by vegetation.
The bar and Roland led them to was just as empty.
There were large holes in the sheet metal roof, and
chunks of the metal walls had been peeled away for
scrap metal. The underlying structure had been built from metal girders,

(30:44):
though it seemed solid. They got out of the truck,
Roland helped Tully carry her lover across the last few
yards of field and into the old barn. The innards
of the building were dusty. Rusted tools hung from the wall,
and boxes of assorted goods littered the floor. Some of
them had ripped open by scavengers, but most looked like
they'd sat unmolested since the property had been abandoned. Manny

(31:05):
found an old couch inside. Roland and Tullie helped Rick
on to it. Then Roland walked off into the middle
of the barn and started to root around in boxes.
He came back a minute later with a load of
canned goods in one arm and a handle of brown
liquor in the other. He sat the whole lot down
on the ground next to the couch, held up a
can labeled water in big red letters, and then punched
his finger through the top of the can. He handed

(31:28):
it to Tulli and she helped Rick drink. He was
semi conscious now, Sasha thought there might be a little
more color in his cheeks. Roland opened three more cans,
one of water and two filled with some sort of
gloopy beef stew. He ripped the aluminum tops open with
his bare fingers and then passed them around. Sasha was
still too deep in the throes of depression and adrenaline

(31:48):
dumpage to have any kind of appetite. The brown gray
color of the stew didn't help with that, but Manny
insisted she take a gulp, and as soon as the
food hit her tongue, Sasha realized she was starving. She
took two were deep gulps of the salty, mushy mass
before passing it along to Tulli. The crew ate and
rehydrated without conversation, although not in silence. The sounds of

(32:09):
gulping and lip smacking filled the barn for a few minutes,
Roland didn't join in the eating. Instead, he popped open
the liquor bottle and drained it dry over the course
of about ninety seconds. The big man closed his eyes,
a smile crept up onto his features, and he gave
a deep, contented sigh. When the food was almost gone,
he stood up and staggered back into the piles of
gear to grab two more bottles. These ones were filled

(32:31):
with an off yellow liquid. He sat one down in
between Manny and Sasha and immediately began to gustle the second.
Many glanced at Sasha, then at Tulli, then down at
the bottle. He popped the top and took a belt.
Then he offered it to Sasha. If there was ever
a time to dive into drinking, it's the day I
killed two people. Sasha took the bottle and stared at
it for a second. The label said Talisker and identified

(32:54):
it as a product of Scotland. The bottle itself was
covered in dust. Hey, Rowland, she asked, suddenly curious, did
you know this place would have food and water and alcohol?
Roland paused draining his second bottle and fixed Sasha with
his strange blue eyes. He looked tired for the first
time since she'd met him. Sasha wasn't sure if that

(33:14):
was due to the rampage he just carried out or
her question. I've been here before, he half mumbled, years ago,
back before this old chunk of dirt was as much
of a ship hole as it is now. Wait did
you used to live here? Manny asked, I don't know.
Roland shrugged. What do you mean you don't know? You
clearly know this farm. He shrugged and gave a vague

(33:35):
wave with his free hand. I have memories of this place,
bright lights at night, people dancing, drugs and wine, and
people in songs. I have memories of packing the supplies
into boxes, buying ammunition. He nodded towards the still locked
door of the barn. I remember locking that thing up,
but I don't remember why exactly. I might have lived here,
it might have belonged to a friend. Either way, I

(33:55):
feel like the last time I was here was back
before the revolution. His mind is full of holes, Manny explained,
something happened to him a few years back. He remembers
pieces of who he is, what he's done, but not everything.
Tulli kicked Sasha gently in the hip. She gestured to
the bottle of whiskey. If you're not drinking past the bottle,
some of us have grieving to do. On impulse, Sasha

(34:17):
took a pull from the bottle. She started to hand
it over to Tulli, but then the taste hit her
and she gagged. It was like someone had lit a
fire in her throat, one that tasted of burning pete.
She coughed and hacked for several seconds, while Tulli and
Roland laughed. Once she regained her breath, Sasha finally handed
off the bottle. You'll get better at it, the woman said,
her lips twisted up into what might have been a

(34:38):
real smile. Whiskey is in acquired taste, like cigars nanarchy.
Tully took a very deep pole and sighed and satisfaction.
She handed the bottle off to Manny and started gently
petting Rick's face. The wounded man was asleep, but he
seemed much healthier than he had been a half hour earlier.
How are you doing, Sasha, Manny asked. His eyes met hers,

(35:01):
and Sasha saw a deep concern in his gaze. I'm fine,
she said, not really meaning it. She's all funked up
over the guy she killed for the truck. Toullie grunted,
shouldn't be fucker picked the wrong side, So did I.
Sasha tried to keep the anger out of her voice.
At first. Darrow was a good man. He didn't deserve

(35:21):
to die. Neither did Marigold, said Toulli. Neither did Major Parne.
Manny added in a quiet voice. They hung him on
the day you and I met. The whole world's full
of good dead people, said Tullie. My advice, don't cry
over someone you shot in self defense. That's a karmic freebie.
The guy had a gun, Manny added, seems like he

(35:42):
just did what she had to do. Rowland was quiet
through all this. He kept drinking, but his pace had slowed.
His face took on a dark cast, and he slumped
down into his chair. He seemed to collapse in on himself.
A little look Cheka, Tulie said. There was a slight,
drunken slurry were words. Now. I know I gave you
a hard time, and it was dumb as fucky in
a mood of this kingdom. But I gave you credit

(36:04):
for breaking free and for helping us escape. You might
be a little dumb, but you aren't bad people in
my book. Don't beat yourself up over doing what you
had to do. There was quiet for a little while
Manny passed the bottle to Sasha. She took another gulp
and managed to hold it down. This time. Tullie nodded
an approval. When Sasha passed the whiskey on, Sasha found

(36:25):
her eyes drawn once more to Darrell's gun. It was
tucked into Tullie's waistband. Roland cleared his throat and gave
a loud, flimmy cough. Sasha looked back at him. You
didn't ask me for an opinion, he said, but since
everyone else's way in and I might as well. There
ain't nothing wrong with feeling bad about murder, even justified murder.
But personally, I don't think that's what's fucking you up.

(36:48):
What do you mean, she asked. He drained the last
of the whiskey bottle and tossed it off into the darkness.
It landed with a clank. I got real good senses,
you know. I can't turn him off. So I heard
your heart right. I smelled the narrow transmitters running through
you synapses. I could taste the guilt wafting off you,
but that's not the only thing I taste. He locked
his unsteady gaze on hers. Sasha stared into the cold

(37:11):
blue of his pupils. A chill ran down her spine,
Sweat beat it on the back of her neck. When
he spoke next, his voice was barely above a whisper.
Back at the jail. When you crushed that guy's skull
with a helmet, you've enjoyed yourself. You liked it. Sasha
broke his gaze. She stared down at her lap and
struggled to find a reply, but there was nothing else

(37:31):
for her to say. Rowland was right. Hello and welcome
to our show. I'm Zoie de Chanelle, and I'm so
excited to be joined by my friends and cast mates
Hannah Simone and Lamar and Morris to recap our hit
television series New Girl. Join us every Monday on the

(37:52):
Welcome to Our Show podcast, where we'll share behind the
scenes stories of your favorite New Girl episodes, revealed the
truth behind the legendary game True American, and discuss how
this show got made with the writer's guest stars and
directors who made the show so special. Fans have been
begging us to do a New Girl recap for years,
and we finally made a podcast where we answer all

(38:12):
your burning questions like is there really a bear? In
every episode of New Girl. Plus each week you'll hear
hilarious stories like this at the end, when he says,
you got some Schmidt on your face. I feel like
I pitched that job. I believe that I feel like
I did. I'm not on a thousand percent. I want
to say that was I tossed that one out. Listen
to the Welcome to Our Show podcast on the I

(38:33):
Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Ev Rodsky, author of the New York Times bestseller
Affair Play and Find Your Unicorn Space, activists on the
gender division of labor, attorney and family mediator. And I'm
Dr as eating A Rutcar, a Harvard physician and medical
correspondent with an expertise and the science of stress, resilience,

(38:55):
mental health, and burnout. We're so excited to share our podcast,
Him Out, a production of I Heart Podcasts and Hell
of Sunshine. We're uncovering why society makes it so hard
for women to treat their time with the value it deserves.
So take this time out with us. Listen to Time Out,
a fair Play podcast on the I Heart Radio app,

(39:16):
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When P. T.
Barnum's Great American Museum burned to the ground in eighteen
sixty five, what rose from its ashes would change the world?
Welcome to Grim and Mild Presents, an ongoing journey into
the strange, the unusual, and the fascinating. For our inaugural season,

(39:36):
we'll be giving you a backstage tour of the always
complex and often misunderstood cultural artifact that is the American
Side Show. So come along as we visit the shadowy
corners of the stage and learn about the people who
were at the center of it all in a place
where spectacle was king. We will soon discover there's always
more to the story than meets the eye, So step

(39:58):
right up and get in line. Listen to Grim and
Mile Presents now on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to podcasts. Learn more over at
Grim and Mild dot com. Slash Presents Chapter twenty two.
Manny Rolling Fuck was as bright, shiny and chaotic as

(40:22):
it had been when he left, but Manny could see
a real change among the citizens themselves. Gone were the
lounging crowds of half naked people instead of the perpetual party.
A war camp spread out around the great superstructure of
the city. Hundreds of men and women were busy dawning armor,
applying war paint, and checking over stacks of weaponry. Manny

(40:42):
saw crates of guided mortars, piles of rocket launchers, boxes
of high velocity ammunition, and enough firearms to equip every
citizen a dozen times over. There was no discernible rolling
fuck uniform that Manny could see. Some of the city's
warriors war powered body armor, painted in garish colors and
bid decked with various quotations Fuck your Day seemed particularly popular.

(41:05):
Many of them wore pieces of pop culture costumery mixed
in with their gear. Manny recognized Darth Vader's helmet, hell
Boy's red right hand, and a surprising number of people
with Mickey Mouse's face spray painted on their chest armor.
An equal number of Fuckians wore no armor at all.
Some of them were dressed in their normal flowing lounge garments.
The weapons they wore were the only signs that they

(41:26):
had plans beyond debauchery. Others were naked or mostly so.
He saw one man wearing the helmet of a Greek
hoplight and carrying two Viking axes on his back. He
saw a woman with a Dragonov rifle on her back,
an old German stallhelm on her head, an Ottoman mirror
armor on her chest. She waved at them, excited. It
took Manny a second to recognize Topas's face under the helmet.

(41:49):
They're here, there, she stopped. Tullie had stopped too. She
cast her face down. Many could see the shimmer of
tears on her cheeks. A crowd gathered around them. In
a few seconds, they were encircled by dozens of heavily
armed post humans in a dizzying array of war costumes.
Skofucker Mike pushed his way to the front and ran
up to embrace Tulli. Manny was surprised when she started

(42:11):
to sob. The big man held her tight, but looked
to Rowland what happened. Roland gave him a look that said,
you know, damn well what happened. But then he spoke, anyway,
your friend didn't make it schofucker. Mike's jaw went tight,
his eyes bulged, and he held onto Tulli a little tighter.
Manny thought back to the night they'd spent in brain

(42:32):
Breakers and the things he'd said about Marigold. Manny hadn't
really known the woman at all, but he could tell
Mike had cared deeply for her. He looked around at
the crowd closing in on them, the dozens of half
human god monsters with helpless rage carved onto their faces.
What happened, Mike demanded. Roland opened his mouth to speak,
closed it and ran a hand over his bald head.

(42:55):
He opened his mouth again, managed to squeeze out an
eye before he slumped his shoulders and hung his head.
I wasn't fast enough, he said. Finally, they had better gear,
newer suits than I had expected. Schoolfucker. Mike stared at him.
Behind him, Topaz slid down to the ground and buried
her head on her knees. Murmurs swept the crowd, and

(43:16):
then Sasha spoke up, Your friends saved my life. Mike
looked over and seemed to notice her for the first time,
and who were you? His voice was not unfriendly, It
wasn't exactly warm either. My name is Sasha, she said,
her voice clearly on the edge of a sob. She
looked from Mike to Toulli, to Topaz, to the crowd,

(43:37):
and then back to Manny. He saw panic in her eyes,
barely held in check by a cage of steely resolve.
I made a mistake. I left my home for the Kingdom.
I thought it was the right thing to do. I
met Marigold while I was there, and she helped me
see how wrong I'd been. She pointed to Roland. I
tried to help him free your people. We all tried,
but they were ready for us. They shot him. She

(44:00):
estra to Rowland. They shot him a lot. They had
us all dead to rights, and then Marigold. I don't
know how, but she got a gun. She shot two
of them, and then they shot her. She died, saving us.
The silence that followed was louder than any artillery barrage
Manny had ever sat through. Finally, Skullfucker Mike nodded at her.
There were tears in his eyes, and Manny soon realized

(44:22):
tears on every face in the crowd. Some people fell
to their knees, others embraced and held their friends. One voice,
hoarse and heavy with pain, howled out in anguish. It
was met by another voice, and then another, and then
another as Fukky and after Fucian tilted their head back
and roared their grief out to the empty blue of
the Texas sky. Rolling Fuck preferred to mourn through activity.

(44:45):
The wailing and gnashing of teeth over Marigold didn't stop
the city's medics from taking Rick and Tully to whatever
buildings served as their equivalent of a clinic. Topaz stayed
behind with a gathering crowd of mourners while skullfucker Mike
gathered up Manny, Sasha and Rowland. There will be time
to process later, He'd said, as much to himself as
to them. There's a war council soon and they'll be

(45:06):
wanting to debrief you. Fine, Roland said, but I'm stopping
at the bar first. I need some opium and some
got him tequila. Manny expected skullfucker Mike to be angered
by that, given the circumstances, but the other chromed man
just nodded and said I could use a drink or
nine myself. They headed for the lift underneath the main
roller Manny started to prepare himself for the meeting with

(45:28):
this war Council, whatever that term meant. In a place
like this, whatever happens, it's bound to be weird. They
reached the lift skullfucker Mike opened the door and gestured
for everyone to enter, and so. Less than an hour
after arriving back in the City of Wheels, Manny, Sasha,
and Rowland found themselves seated around the same redwood table
where they had first met Nana Yazi and Donald Ferris.

(45:51):
The room was more crowded this time around, with two
new people he didn't recognize. One was a shirtless man
with writhing snake tattoos across his chest and a pair
of chaps that did nothing at all to cover up
his junk. It didn't help that the man's legs were
spread as wide as possible. He seemed to be deliberately
showing off. Manny looked away and found himself staring at

(46:12):
a very tall, very muscular, young seeming woman with a
mohawk made from thick chrome spikes. She had light brown skin.
Her cheeks were covered in several long, thin diagonal scars.
The woman's eyes had no pupils. They looked gray at first,
until Mannie realized they were actually just filled with static.
When Manny finally pulled his gaze away from her, he
was met with the biggest surprise of the day. Deshaun

(46:35):
Clark was seated two chairs down from Nana Yazi. Major
Clark many. The Major's lips cracked open into a wide
mouthed grin. The left side of his face was still
covered in hemostatic gauze, and the edges of the skin
around the gauze looked black and burnt. His right hand
was a smooth, angry pink color, a sure sign that
had been severed and regrown in the recent past. Major

(46:56):
Clark was bloody but unbowed. It's damn good to see him. Annie.
I can't tell you how proud I was to hear
you'd volunteered for this mission, Mr Pirrone, Manny started to say,
But Major Clark put up his hand, I know, he said.
Donald Ferris ahemmed, which Manny took as a gentle reminder
that now was not the time for personal business. The

(47:17):
old brit gestured first to the man with the riding
snake tattoos. This is Jim Shannon, he said. He heads
up a small mercenary outfit. I'm the guy who roped
Roland into helping, Jim said with a wink. And this
cheery lass. Donald pointed to the woman with a chromehawk
is Kashore. She's been the city's elected wally too for

(47:37):
the past three years. And who might this young lady be,
Nanna Yazzi asked, nodding at Sasha. The old woman stood
and stepped forward to greet Sasha with a hug. Sasha
tensed up. She looked scared to return the embrace, so
Nana Yazzi backed off and favored the girl with a
warm smile. I'm sorry, child, I didn't mean to pressure you.

(47:58):
I'm just happy or hear with us. Sasha relaxed at that,
but she still didn't step forward. Her name, Sasha said Rowland.
She used to be with the Kingdom, now she's not.
He paused a second, considered his words, and added, she
beat one of em to death with a helmet. Oh my,
oh dear. Nana Yazzi tisked and shook her head. I'm

(48:18):
so sorry, Sasha, that must have been a terrible experience
for you. She enjoyed it, Jim said with a harsh
bark of a laugh. I'm sure Rowland smells it too.
Isn't that a radhun You loved killing whoever the fuk
you killed, and you feel shitty about that? Will let
me suit stop right now, or you'll leave this room.
Nana Yazzi's voice was firm, but devoid of any anger

(48:40):
or heat. Tomanny's shock, Jim stopped the Posthuman nodded and said,
I apologized, Sasha, that was a dick move, and then
he lowered his eyes just a little. In contrition. Nana
Yazzi offered Sasha a seat and then busied herself in
the corner, making Sasha a cup of tea. Once that
was done and they were all settled in, Anna sat
back down and looked at Manny. What happened, is all,

(49:03):
she asked. Manny started talking. He told her, and by extension,
the whole table, everything that had happened since he and
Rowland left rolling fuck. He told them about their trouble
with the checkpoints on the way into town. He walked
them through the intake process, his and Roland's few days
as martyrs in training, and what he'd seen in the
few sections of Plano he'd been allowed to haunt during

(49:24):
his time there. The woman with the Chrome Hawk was
particularly interested in what he and Rowland had to say
about the Kingdom's preferred assault tactics. They're not going to
be kicking indoors in fighting house to house, Roland explained, No,
just start shelling at the first sign of resistance. They
don't care about civilian casualties. When Manny explained what the
Kingdom had been doing at the old Tesla factory, almost

(49:45):
everyone looked horrified. Donald Ferris spat at the ground. Most
of the others cursed or at least shook their heads.
Nana Yazi teared up. Jim, though seemed almost enthusiastic about
the revelation. Fascinating, he muttered just loud enough for Manny
to hear. Once everyone was caught up the table fired
off a few questions at him and more towards Rowland.

(50:07):
They seemed mostly curious as to what they'd been able
to glean about the number of recruits in the Heavenly Kingdom.
Manny didn't have much useful there, so he shut up,
leaned back, and let Rowland give the answers. An awkward
silence descended on the table. After a few minutes well,
Donald Ferris said, finally, I suppose we were fools to
hope for much more than what you've got as it stands.

(50:29):
Were left grappling to try an account for the sheer
number of men the Kingdom has deployed to assault Austin
twenty thousand Madas Jim spoke up and give a take
a grand Manny's blood went cold. The SDF at its
height hadn't been more than six thousand fighters, and those
were spread out across the serried battle grounds of North Texas.

(50:50):
The whole free city of Austin didn't have more than
five thousand people in its full time defense corps. Twenty
thousand men was impossible, he said, that's just fucking impossible.
I'd be inclined to agree with you, kid, said Jim,
if my own men hadn't double checked the count for us.
The Kingdom's already marshaled half of that force on the
outskirts of d'a f w near Lancaster. They'll be in

(51:12):
Waco tomorrow if no one stops him. Hell, they could
be pound in Austin with artillery by doc Donald Ferris
nodded mister Shennon. Here he gestured, to Jim, as agreed
to lend a hand along with several dozen of his mercenaries.
Add that to the warriors of Rolling Fuck, and we've
got seven hundredish post humans. It's a large enough force

(51:33):
to hold Waco and badly bloody their nose. But Cushuri
spoke for the first time. She had a deep, gravelly
voice that sounded like she'd been eating cigarettes for the
last ten years. Rolling Funck is not in the business
of volunteering for our own Vietnams. My people aren't signing
up for a war. I can guarantee our presence on

(51:53):
the battlefield for up to forty eight hours, enough time
for vengeance, she continued. After that, you're her in cats.
Is that a problem, Manny asked, I mean I saw
Roland lay waste to half a city, six hundred of him.
There's only one of him, Kishore said. Jim nodded in
agreement and fixed Manny with his uncomfortable gray eyes. Let see, kid,

(52:15):
he said me. Anyone a Roland Fox war is as
good for a few dozen normal troops in a straight fight.
More of we're talking half trained partizans, but nobody is
like Roland. Many looked over to Roland. The big man
seemed distinctly uncomfortable with all the attention. He stared down
at his hands, which seemed to be occupied with tearing
up a paper drink coaster. The Matas have a lot

(52:38):
of half trained potizans, but they've also got tanks, artilleryous suits,
the resources of a nation state or close enough, rolland
fuck can hold that off for a while. But without
rolland the best they can do is delay the inevitable.
Now with Roland, Jim continued, this is a two hour
five tops. We set up our troops in some little

(52:59):
chunk of the city and stop dropping mortars and rockets
on the van God. They pull up and circle us
and start deploying their artillery to bombas to kingdom. Come then,
when they a good and packed together, we dropped Roland
on the asses. Because Shore He nodded, yes, She said,
he'll hit them and disrupt their whole order of battle
while our cavalry rolls around their flanks and charges. That

(53:21):
should be enough to make them panic. Then we'd chase
them down until they lose cohesion. Roland's heads stayed down.
He didn't speak. Manny looked from him to Jim to
Nanna Yazzi and Donald Ferris. So what's the problem, Manny asked.
If Roland and Rolling Funk are all in, there should
be a walk in the park. Rowland, Nanny Yazzi said,
prefers not to fight. But I just saw him. You

(53:43):
just saw me break a long streak of not killing people.
Roland's voice sounded odd, hollow and dry, and utterly without
any of the mirth or mischief Manny had come to
expect from the chromed man. I did that to get
my memories back, Manny, he shrugged, And I did it
for you because you're my buddy. But I got no
stake in Austin. But you know what the Heavenly Kingdom
will do if they take the city, Manny protested. You've

(54:05):
seen what they did to Plano. They'll do that to
millions of decent people if they can. You have the
power to stop that. You're telling me you won't. Roland
met his eyes and just said, yes, Hugh, son of
a bitch. Manny felt the anger well up inside him.
It merged with his grief over Major Pirone's death, Oscar's death,
and his rage at the Heavenly Kingdom, the martyrs and

(54:27):
every other group of assholes who'd helped turn his young
life into a parade of nightmares. Hugh absolute, son of
a bitch, You fucking coward. Manny didn't think, couldn't think.
He pulled back his fist and swung as hard as
he could for Roland's face. The chrombed man didn't move,
didn't even blink. Manny hit him right in the nose.
He was softer than Manny would have guessed, didn't feel

(54:48):
any different from punching a normal human. Manny swung again
and again until he felt something crack in his knuckles.
He cried out from the pain and pulled back to
nurse his wounded hand. For a few seconds, Manny or
God about the rest of the room. He closed his
eyes and let his thoughts dissolve into an ocean of
physical pain. The agony of his broken hand was almost soothing.

(55:08):
It was better than thinking about Mr. Pirrone. It was
better than thinking about Alejandro or Oscar. It was better
than thinking about his soon to be shattered home. Manny
felt a hand on his shoulder. The sensation pulled him
out of his spiraling thoughts. He looked up and saw
nanny Azzi. She smiled, her sad smile and said, Manny,
everyone here understands your pain. Not me, said Jim, I've

(55:32):
never been a big fan Austin too, damn rolland threw
his empty pint glass at the other post human's face.
It shattered on impact, embedding shards deep into Jim's cheeks
and forehead. His head snapped back and he blinked in shock.
A few times. Sorry, he said, I deserve that, and
I deserved that. Roland said to Manny, no hard feelings

(55:53):
I get while you're pissed, But kid, you gotta understand something.
Austin's home to you, to me, it's just another city
held by just another side. Half my remaining memories are
of one cause or another asking me to go murder
in their name. I'm fucking done with it. Minnie looked
to Major Clark, the STF officer's eyes were lit by
a familiar cold fire. He spoke in a tone of

(56:15):
barely controlled anger. That is, you're right, of course, you
can choose to leave, just as I will choose to
fight and die. I wonder what Manny will choose. Manny
hadn't really settled on that himself. Before he could stumble
through his response Sasha spoke. I'll fight, she said. I
don't know much about guns, but I'll do my best.

(56:36):
Roland slumped back in his chair and tossed his arms
up in a dramatic show of frustration. At two, Jesus, girl,
i'll fight, Manny said to Major Clark, doing his best
to talk over Roland. I'll choose to fight too. This
isn't gonna work, you know, Roland said, I'm not going
to be shamed into fighting again. It's just not going
to fucking happen. Jim leaned in. He fixed Roland with

(56:59):
a look that seemed almost hungry. I think it will happen.
I think the peculiar arc of your moral compass won't
let you leave these kids to die. He seemed surprised
by the revelation. Huh, fascinating enough of that. Donald Ferris
sounded angry. I won't stand to see this man badget
and press it into fighting against his will. We might

(57:20):
as well dissolve the counsel for now and reconvene without Roland. Good.
Roland stood up and stomped over to the exit. That's
all you people need for me. I'm gonna go get
good and pissed. And start my walk back to Arizona.
He flipped his middle finger out at the room and
slammed the door behind him. As he left, all eyes
turned to Manny. I should probably go talk to him.

(57:42):
Don't do anything you're not comfortable doing. Emmanuel Donald said,
fuck that. Jim said, the bestard's on the ropes. Shame him,
shame him good. As he headed for the exit, Mannie
looked to Major Clark. The old soldier's one good eye
was narrow and focused. Manny, he said, if he didn't
want to tuck, he wouldn't have gone up to the bar.
He'd have just left. There's no honor lost. In another conversation,

(58:06):
another try, Roland was three beers in by the time
Manny reached him, and knowing rolling fuck that could mean
he'd already ingested enough acid to kill a large octopus.
Hey man, he said, heybody. Roland replied in a voice
that was just super stoned. Sorry about getting angry. Back there,

(58:27):
the post Humans spun his empty pint glass around on
the bar table. It was a strange sight to see.
Manny had gotten so used to seeing Roland is something
akin to a Greek god. He certainly wasn't omniscient or omnipotent,
but he was unspeakably powerful and just as irresponsible to
leave out around humans. And yet here he was fiddling
with an empty pint glass like a nervous college freshman

(58:49):
standing at the back wall of some house party. Many
felt a surge of sympathy. It's okay, man, I think
I actually get it, he said, like I've had plenty
of chances to join I of the SDF or the
Austin Defense Forces. I never did. Maybe some of that's
because I'm scared help. Up until like a few days ago,
my plan was to get the funk off this continent

(59:09):
as soon as I could afford it. Manny paused and
bit his lip. It was an instinctive gesture, his gut's
reaction to a sudden burst of self awareness. Manny hadn't
thought about any of this before. I don't know, he said.
This ship has been going on basically my whole life.
I can't remember a time when I wasn't scared of
something like this happening. I didn't understand any of it
as a kid, but I can remember being seven or

(59:31):
eight years old and just being so angry at the soldiers,
even our soldiers. I thought, if all you assholes would
just refuse to be led into battle, none of this
could happen. You know, that's not how it works, Ryan
Roland asked as he turned away from Manny and waved
at the bartender. We love this war ship. At least
someone us due those of us who were Oh the

(59:52):
bartender arrived, Roland ordered my time mixed with the margharita
and one of those what you got him column? Oh yeah,
a fucking mohito Roland. Manny's voice was gentle but firm.
How many beers did you drink before I got here?
No beers, Roland said in a casual voice. Mushroom rum,
sweet but not bad. He licked his lips as he
watched the bartender work through the herculean task of crafting

(01:00:15):
his request at beverage. Roland Manny said, and the chrombed
man turned back to him. Ah, sorry, it's just been
too long a stretch of sober for me. I got excited.
What the funk was I saying? That war is fun?
Oh yeah, as long as you don't think you will die.
That's why all throughout history he had so many generals
and politicians kicking off conflicts because they felt safe and

(01:00:37):
when you're pretty sure you'll live, war is an absolute hoot.
That's the problem with me and fighting the problem as
you like it too much. Roland grabbed his hand. The
chrombed man moved so fast Manny didn't even see the
motion blur. Roland's hand was just wrapped around his wrist, immovable.
He squeezed hard enough that it hurt. Roland's eyes bulged

(01:00:57):
out and stared into Manny with a man of intense
at that was frightening. I fucking love it. It's like
sex on heroin and bungee jumping and getting rammed in
the assid and that first shadow liquor you is snake
when you're fourteen, all at once, and mixed with the
best actual battle drugs the most bloated military budget and
history can buy. He loosened his grip and turned half
away from Manny. That's why I shouldn't do it, because

(01:01:20):
I'll get carried away like I got carried away in Dallas.
Maybe this time I won't be able to stop when
it's time to stop. Many kept his eyes on Rowland's.
The big man turned a little further to the left,
but he didn't look away. How do you know that
your intervention won't make things better, Manny asked. Maybe if
we can kill enough in the martyrs, their power will
be broken forever. Maybe your intervention will be the first

(01:01:41):
step towards making this a more livable part of the globe.
Roland laughed. It started as a low chuckle that then
cascaded into a series of rolling, rib cracking howls. Manny
didn't get the joke, and he couldn't find any humor
in his words, so he sat tight until Roland's mirth
subsided and the chromed man had recovered enough to explain
him self. Sor right, sorry, he said, between chuckles. It's

(01:02:04):
just a ship. Kid, you're too young to know how
funny that is. Roland straightened up and wiped a tear
from his eye. So you're talking about me the exact
same way people talked about the U. S. Military back
when I was a kid. The bartender came by and
sat down Roland's drink, an enormous jug filled with a
multi hued mix of alcoholic beverages. The post human took

(01:02:25):
a deep poll from his my Tai garito man. He
took the chance to ask a question I thought you
didn't remember anything further back than a few years ago.
I don't remember anything clearly, Roland said, But I do
remember bits and pieces, and I remember being a young
man and watching the news break in an off base bar.
Some election had gone bad in Bolivia. The president announced

(01:02:45):
he was sending in soldiers to keep the peace. Did
it work, Manny asked, I don't, no kid, would your
school teach you about Bolivia? That there was a genocide
at oh Man, he said, as Roland's points sunk in
right yep. Roland grunted and took another deeper pull from
his ridiculous beverage. They were quiet for a while. Mannie

(01:03:06):
took the opportunity to take a long look at Roland.
His face held only a few lines around his eyes
and lips, and yet he still looked old, positively ancient.
There appeared to be a tremendous weight to the man's eyes,
accentuated by the deep wrinkles underneath them. It looked as
if the chrombed man's face was sagging underneath the weight
of what he had seen Rowland. Mannie asked, do you

(01:03:27):
have any idea of where you came from? I think
I was born round Mississippe ba No, Manny interrupted, not
like where you were born, but how you became what
you are to day. You said, you've been disconnected from
the internet for the last ten years. I've got a
guess your implants or even older than that. But the
way everyone here talks about you, you're still king shit ah.
Roland said, yeah that. I got no real idea what

(01:03:50):
happened there. I know I was in the army. I'm
pretty sure that's when the tankering started, sure, Manny said,
but didn't A lot of the road people start as
especial forces who went rogue. Why are you special? You
had no clear answer to that, buddy, He smiled, as
if he just remembered something good. I guess I've got
that surgery coming up. Once I get my memories back,
I'll let you know what I find out. Manny laughed too,

(01:04:13):
but his was cold and bitter. Sure, I'll probably be
in a refugee camp at that point, or dead, damn kid.
Roland said, yeah, man, he said, I'm really not trying
to manipulate you here. It's just now I get it.
I get and Roland waved him off. It's fair. You
get every right to be piste. I just can't. He
trailed off many put a hand on Roland's shoulder. He

(01:04:36):
didn't understand how the post human felt. How could he?
Man He couldn't even conceive of having that kind of power.
But he could see why it was a difficult choice.
There was a part of Manny, a dark, manipulative chunk
of his soul, that knew he was on his way
to changing Roland's mind. This was essentially the same strategy
he used on the job. You built empathy with people
through a combination of shared experiences in regular engagement. That

(01:05:00):
but he paid dividends when you needed some lieutenant's approval
to cross the checkpoint. It would pay dividends here if
he was careful and consistent. As fucked up man he thought,
you're manipulating your friend into killing a bunch of people.
You know what, Manny said, I'm sorry, I didn't mean
to Roland drain the rest of his mug beuched and
looked over at Manny. He looked unsteady, half conscious. The

(01:05:22):
chrombed man put his left hand over Manny's hand while
it rested on his shoulder. He fixed Manny with his
half focused eyes and nodded FuG it. Roland said, I'll
fucking help you and be a dick if it didn't.
Thank you, Manny said with a nod, I know, do not
not say anything else, kid, I don't really want to
think about what I just promised to do. Man He

(01:05:43):
found Sasha sitting around a fire pit outside the city,
proper deep in conversation with Donald Ferris. She sat on
the ground, legs splayed out wide with her button the grass.
Donald sat in a folding chair. It wasn't cold outside precisely,
but it had cooled off a great deal from the
heat of the day. The air held just the barest
hint of winter. It was shaping up to be one

(01:06:04):
of those odd September days where Texas seemed on the
verge of an actual seasonal shift. One look at Sasha's
face told him that she was at least as unsettled
as Roland. He didn't want to crowd her, so he
squatted down on the other side of Donald. Emmanuel. The
old man's voice was as smooth and rich as Manny
remembered from the narration of his documentary, It's good to

(01:06:24):
see you. Sasha's been telling me her story. She actually
just turned to the subject of you, eh. Manny asked, yes,
she was telling me how she met you and Marigold,
and how you both helped to find her way free
of the kingdom. Oh, he said, and looked at Sasha.
I never really met Marigold. I didn't realize you knew
her well. Sasha shook her head. I only knew her

(01:06:46):
a little while. I was just supposed to be administering
tests to her. But I couldn't stop her from talking,
and she made sense. She made more sense than what
was going on out in the Kingdom every day. Sasha
stared down into the fading embers of the fire. I
feel stupid forever believing in that place. What do you
believe now, Donald asked, I don't know, She said. It

(01:07:08):
seems arrogant to decide that God doesn't exist just because
I let myself get taken in by a colt. M
The old man nodded. The good news is you're young.
You've got plenty of time to figure things out. Again,
his cheeks turned up into a smile and his face
blossomed with wrinkles. Now he looked up at Manny, what
have you been up to, my dear boy talking to Roland.

(01:07:29):
Manny said he agreed to help. By the way, he's
going to fight. Donald Ferris's smile turned into a frown.
Manny hadn't been expecting that. How did you do it,
he asked, in a somber, grave voice. We just talked
for a while, Manny said. He explained why he didn't
want to fight. It sounded very reasonable. Manny paused, and

(01:07:51):
then made the choice to lie just a little. I
wasn't trying to change his mind. I didn't ask him
to help. That last part was true. At least. I
do feel bad, though, I'm sure he changed his mind
because of me. Is it really on you if he
chooses to fight, Sasha asked, I killed two men. Both
of those deaths are on me. But you didn't order
Roland to do anything. No. Donald Ferris agreed, But I

(01:08:14):
doubt Roland would have made the decision to intervene if
Manny hadn't pressed. That's probably true, Manny admitted. Donald looked
from Manny to Sasha. There's a war ritual peculiar to
the men and women in whatever's of this community. I
think you'd benefit from seeing it. A ritual, Sasha asked,

(01:08:35):
not a religious one? I assure you, but yes, they
call it their war ritual. He extended a hand out
to the field around Rolling Fuck. Many looked out at
it for the first time since coming out here and
realized that people seem to be packing up right now.
Donald said, the citizens are packing up their tints and
their arvis and preparing the city for departure. It's moving

(01:08:55):
out with their army. They'll drive that thing. He jerked
a thumb in the direction of the City of Wheels,
right up to the damn battlefield. It'll be behind them
the whole time they're fighting. I think they've stole the
idea from the ancient Celts. Anyway, he said. Once the
city's in position, they'll open up these little boxes that
look quite a lot like bee hives, and they'll let

(01:09:16):
out a swarm of about a thousand little drones. Those
are mostly just facial recognition cameras attached to wings and
a wee engine. They'll record everything and send data on
the faces of every enemy fighter to a central computer
in the city. What did does that do, Manny asked.
It gives us a chance to identify those men or women,

(01:09:36):
so we can scrape their social media profiles and display
pictures and videos from their lives. Once they die, the
whole city, everyone who isn't fighting turns out to watch that.
That sounds fucking terrible, Manny said, what do we gain
from watching the home movies of dead men? A memorial?
Manny didn't understand, but he could see that Donald Ferris

(01:09:58):
was revving himself up for an all explanation. He let
the old man speak. I was a small child when
my country invaded a Rack, along with the United States
and a few other nations. The war was news, yes,
but that's all it was. Even our own soldiers were
more numbers than real people. I'd hear that two Royal
Marines had died in a roadside bombing, and it meant

(01:10:20):
less to me than when my neighbor broke his legs
slipping down the stairs. War isn't like that for us,
Manny said, I don't know anyone in Austin who hasn't
lost a friend or family to the fighting. It affects
us all, So it does, my boy, So it does.
And if any of our warriors die to day, you
can bet it'll affect everyone in this social experiment we
call a city. But you didn't let me finish. The

(01:10:42):
first thing that was truly toxic about my childhood knowledge
of war is that it erased the other side. Our
boys didn't do body counts, so there were seldom reports
on how many civilians we killed, how many enemy fighters died.
That information was out there, but you had to look hard.
Most people ever did. Donald Ferris shrugged and then winced

(01:11:03):
from the motion. It's easy to get people to care
about their own soldiers, but if you want to stop wars,
or at least make them less common, you've got to
get people to give a shit about the soldiers on
the other side. That, my young friend, is where your
people are even worse than my own. You're close enough
to the war to not just feel indifferent about these
martyrs marching off to die. You actively want them to die.

(01:11:25):
That's understandable, but it's also poisonous. When you dehumanize others,
you become less human yourself. Many nodded, not sure of
what to say. In my youth, Donald Ferris continued, the
country that occupied this continent was the most powerful nation
on earth. They held the keys to the deadliest military
machine ever constructed. It was easy to get Americans to

(01:11:47):
support involvement in a thousand little conflicts, because each only
required a small fraction of the nation's military power and
only risked a few American lives. But millions of people
around the world died, women and children and old men
and dumby young boys, from Yemen to Turkey to Guatemala.
To justify those murders, Americans had to make those people

(01:12:08):
less than human. And once they've done that, it wasn't
such a great jump to do it to their neighbors.
He stared up at the setting sun, and Manny saw
tears in his eyes. What you're going to see tomorrow
is the best attempt I've seen so far to bridge
the empathy gap between a people and their folds. Look

(01:12:34):
for your children's eyes to see the true magic of
a forest. It's a storybook world for them. You look
and see a tree. They see the wrinkled face of
a wizard with arms outstretched to the sky. They see
treasure and pebbles, They see a windy path that could
lead to adventure, and they see you. They're fearless. Guide

(01:12:54):
is this fascinating world? Find a forest near you and
start exploring it. Discover the forest dot Org brought to
you by the United States Force Service and the AD Council.
This is Roxanne Gay, host of The Roxanne Gay Agenda,
the Bad Frominist Podcast of Your Dreams. Now, what is
the Roxanne Gay Agenda, you might ask, Well, It's a

(01:13:14):
podcast where I'm going to speak my mind about what's
on my mind, and that could be anything. Every week
I will be in conversation with an interesting person who
has something to say. We're going to talk about feminism, race,
writing and books and art, food, pop culture, and yes, politics.
I started each show with a recommendation. Really, I'm just

(01:13:37):
going to share with you a movie or a book,
or maybe some music or a comedy set, something that
I really want you to be aware of and maybe
engage with as well. Listen to the Luminary original podcast,
The Roxanne Gay Agenda, The Bad Feminist Podcast of Your Dreams,
every Tuesday on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,

(01:13:58):
or wherever you get your podcast. What grows in the
forest trees, Sure no one else grows in the forest.
Our imagination, our sense of wonder, and our family bonds
grow too. Because when we disconnect from this and connect
with this, we reconnect with each other. The forest is

(01:14:23):
closer than you think, find a forest near you and
start exploring. I Discover the Forest dot Org. Brought to
you by the United States Forest Service and the ad Council,
Chapter twenty three. Sasha Rolling Fuck trundled forward, crunching its
way over the Texas Plains and leaving a carpet of

(01:14:44):
flattened grass and broken trees in its wake. And Sasha Marian,
situated in a little purple building atop one of the
city's tallest spires, couldn't quite believe her eyes. In spite
of its many wheels, the city didn't look like the
kind of thing that should be able to move. It
was as if the Empire State Building had taken up jogging.
Sasha had been more or less alone since the War

(01:15:06):
Council had concluded. She'd wanted to go up to the
bar with Manny and Rowland, since they were the only
people here she even sort of knew, but their conversation
had seemed a private sort of thing. At first, she
thought that her hosts had made an oversight in leaving
her unwatched. Surely they wouldn't let someone who had been
their enemy just a few days ago wander freely through
their home. But as the hours went by, it became

(01:15:27):
clear that's exactly what they'd done, so Sasha explored it
had been exhilarating. Actually, every inch of the city was
different and strange and new to her. Across the gantries
there were numerous market stalls with fresh meat and produce.
At first she recognized all the foods, but the higher
and further she went, the stranger everything seemed. The meat

(01:15:48):
went from beef and chicken to alligator, in, zebra and mammoth,
and eventually something Sasha thought might be from an actual dinosaur.
She was sure it was all lab grown, and the
produce was certainly gene modified. At one point, she came
across a kiosk filled with fruit that had been tweaked
to take the shape of gigantic erect penises. There were
penis watermelons, penis oranges, penis apples, and even bags of

(01:16:10):
tiny penis shaped grapes. She knew she should have felt disgusted.
Two weeks ago, Sasha would have been horrified, but somehow
she just wasn't. She felt a vague sense of unease
awkwardness at the sight of so many genitals, but after
all she'd seen in the heavenly kingdom. It didn't exactly
horrify her either, how could it. The fondel boats were

(01:16:31):
another matter. The sight and the strange, musky, sweet smell
that wafted out of the grinding, groping crowd inside it
made her queasy. This is exactly as depraved as Pastor
Mike said it would be, she thought. But she also thought,
is this really worse than all that violence and death?
Who were they hurting? The Lord? Said a shrill, small
voice in the back of her mind. Why would God

(01:16:53):
hate this and not the hanging of good people? Sasha wondered,
Why would this make him angry but not the butchery
inside that factory? You know what the Bible says, Sasha,
There is no getting around that. The scriptures were clear.
Well maybe they're wrong. Then maybe they've always been wrong,
or maybe I read them wrong. Maybe they didn't say
what I thought they said. It was odd, how freeing

(01:17:16):
that thought was. She made her way past a fondo boat, and,
for no reason beyond curiosity and the desire to stretch
her muscles, Sasha started to climb upwards. The gantries that
made up the bulk of rolling fox walking space were
fairly easy for a human to traverse. They had high walls,
so even the very drunk were unlikely to fall, and

(01:17:36):
in spite of the city's clutter and bustle, its designers
had done a good job of making two clear lanes
for foot traffic. But the gantries only gave Sasha access
to a handful of the strange, glittering buildings that dotted
the city's rolling superstructure, so she left them and she
climbed up. It was not an easy climb. Here and
there she found small sections of ladder or not a

(01:17:56):
rope to ease her passage. For the most part, though,
she climbed aimed hand over hand up the criss crossed
metal girders. She passed several buildings filled with people drinking
and partying. Sasha didn't stop to talk. The climb was hard,
but at least it allowed her to avoid awkward conversation
with whatever manner of creatures lived in this place. By
the time she reached the top of the spindle, Sasha's

(01:18:17):
body was drenched in sweat and her arms were too
sore to pull her up one more foot. She was
grateful to whoever had decided to cap this spindle. With
a tiny purple shack, and she was even more grateful
that the shack appeared unoccupied. Sasha pulled herself inside and
collapsed on the floor for a while. It was all
she could do to regain her breath. She wondered, in

(01:18:38):
a vague sort of way, if she'd just broken into
someone's home. Nobody had warned her that there would be
certain places she couldn't travel here, but no one had
told her much of anything at all. After she'd arrived,
Sasha took stock of her surroundings. The interior of the
room was plush. The walls were carpeted in thick, cushiony velvet.
The floor below her seemed to be some sort of

(01:18:58):
black shag. There was a framed picture on one wall.
Sasha didn't recognize the artist, but it looked like a
cross section drawing of a handgun with fetuses as the bullets.
The sight of it made her feel a bit sick,
but there was also something about the art that drew
her eyes. The center of the room was a low,
flat table that appeared to be made entirely of mirrored glass.

(01:19:19):
There was a pile of white powder on the center
of the table, along with a strange, rectangular piece of
green paper. Sasha picked up the paper and stared at it.
It took her a moment to realize what it was. Money,
said a voice from behind her. Oh, it used to
be once upon a time. Sasha frose stiffened. She turned around,
not sure what to expect, but with an apology already

(01:19:41):
spilling out of her mouth. I'm sorry, sir, I didn't.
Something in the man's smile and the relaxed slump of
his shoulders made her stop talking. He stood in the
doorway of the little building, just a few feet in
front of her. She had no idea how he could
have climbed up and in there without her hearing him.
She didn't remember the man's name, but she recognized him
from the war council. Those writhing snake tattoos identified him

(01:20:03):
as clearly as a name tag. I'm she trailed off.
He smiled at her. There was something about his eyes
that seemed off wrong. She couldn't place it. His pupils
were somehow different than they should have been when he spoke,
though his voice was warm and friendly. You are Saschamarian,
the girl who was brave enough to flee her home
and family for the heavenly Kingdom, and then brave enough

(01:20:26):
to leave it when she realized what it truly was.
His head dipped down into a slight bow. I'm Jim Shannon.
It's an honor to meet you, miss Marian. Jim squatted
down on his haunches and dropped his arms in between
his legs. It was a casual motion, but he executed
it with almost mechanical precision. There was something to his
movements that spoke of terrible potential energy, kinetic force just

(01:20:49):
waiting to be unleashed. It's nice to meet you, she said,
because what else could she say. Jim smile didn't change,
but his eyes did. His pupils contracted and then changed
shape from a circle to a spiraling rounded star. No,
it's not, he said. That's not a lie to each other, Eh, Sasha,
I'm weird. I move wrong. My eyes. As he spoke,

(01:21:12):
his star pupils started to spin in a hypnotic spiral.
Are wrong. They don't look human. I can hear your
hotbeat elevate as we speak. I can smell codazol in
your brain and elevated levels of blood glucose. I can
see in your eyes that me saying this has made
you even more nervous. Yes, she admitted, Yes, you're right,

(01:21:33):
you scare me. That's perfectly normal, miss Marian. It is
not an act of weakness to admit fear. Quite the opposite.
You feel better now, don't you? She actually did. There
was a queer sort of relief in admitting her fear
and discomfort in this man thing's presence. I do feel better,
she said. Why is that? Admitting fear is the first

(01:21:55):
step to conquering it. You don't strike me as someone
who wants to live in fear, miss Marian. You do
strike me as someone who seeks control, strength, power over
your own life. I, she sputtered, I don't. I don't know.
A week ago, i'd have told you God was in
control of my life. Sasha looked down at her lap,
suddenly embarrassed. It wasn't very long ago, but it feels

(01:22:19):
like a lifetime. It was so peaceful, just handing over control.
Jim nodded and leaned his head forward a few inches.
That didn't end well, though, did it. Sasha shook her head.
You traveled to the heaven the Kingdom with a certain
set of beliefs about the universe. Those beliefs met reality,
Reality broke them into little pieces. There's no shame in that.

(01:22:43):
It happens to all of us. Now you're a bit
older and a few bits wiser. She looked up at him.
His smile seemed somehow softer. Now she felt like opening up,
confiding in this stranger. Sasha wondered if that was another
aspect of his modifications, some alteration of his body chemists
tree in physical appearance that allowed him to seem more
familiar and trustworthy to her. She opened up anyway, I

(01:23:06):
just don't know what to do now. I guess I
could go home, but I don't think I was wrong
in leaving home. I don't want a life in the
American Federation. I know that. I just you don't know
what's right, Jim finished, in a voice that was gentler
than she would have guessed he was capable of sounding.
She nodded as she struggled for her next words. I
know I can't go back. I don't know where to

(01:23:27):
go next. I don't have any money or really any
useful skills, so I can't go to California or Cascadia.
I doubt this place will take me. She gestured down
at the rolling city below them, and even if they would,
I don't really feel comfortable here either. Hmm. Jim nodded
and leaned back. Perhaps he said, you should wear a
less about where you want to end up and more

(01:23:48):
about what you want to end up doing. I don't
have any options, Sasha said, fighting down a rising panic
that tickled the back of her throat. I didn't even
finish high school. I've spent the last two years preparing
to join the Kingdom. I don't know how to do
anything useful. That's where you're wrong, Jim said, in a
firm voice. You lied well enough to hide your intention

(01:24:09):
from your parents and am fed law enforcement. You did
that for years. Sasha wanted to argue that she hadn't lied,
not according to Pastor Mike's definition of the word, but
she stayed silent while he spoke. You escaped from one
of the most fortified bodhas in the world, Jim continued,
and you did useful work in a medical facility. Then
you helped facilitate the escape of several prisoners from a

(01:24:31):
Kingdom jail. You functioned effectively in a firefight and killed
a trained soldier in hand to hand combat. Then you
killed another man and stole a vehicle to aid your
comrades in an escape. Am I missing anything? Sasha looked
down again. She didn't speak. She felt bad about taking
praise from murder, especially for Darrell's murder. She did, however,

(01:24:52):
feel a tiny swell of pride at Jim's words. It
was immediately accompanied by a flood of guilt. Killing is
not something to be proud of, she said, Oh, I disagree,
Jim chuckled. Killing is a highly technical skill, and you've
proven yourself a talented amateur. With some training and a
spot of chrome, you could really be something. He trailed off.

(01:25:14):
Sasha was quiet for a moment. She looked into Jim's
eyes and tried to read something in them that proved
a fool's Errand there was nothing in those orbs but
cool confidence, And even that might be false. What did
any gesture or look mean from a man who could
control every aspect of his body right down to his pupils.
I don't want to get better at killing, she told him.

(01:25:35):
I don't want to fill my body with unnatural things.
Just thinking about it makes me feel ill. And yet
Jim said, what do you mean? And yet, she asked,
And yet that thought intrigues you too. It's no use,
hadn't it? I can taste deceit. Sasha shuddered a little
at that, but she couldn't deny that he was right.

(01:25:57):
As much as the idea repulsed her, she had spent
too much time hourless to not crave power. I'm not
looking to push you into anything, Sasha, but I would
like to provide you with a unique opportunity. What do
you mean, she asked. He smiled, plopped down on his butt,
and swung his legs in to sit cross le get
on the shag carpet. Jim stuck a finger into the

(01:26:18):
thick black fibers of the carpet and started tugging at them.
It was an idle, nervous gesture, and Sasha found it
oddly endearing. Part of her suspected that had been his goal.
I mean that I would be willing to take you
on as a project. A project, he nodded. My organization
has access to skilled surgeons, military grade agmatics, and vat

(01:26:40):
growing organs. I'll front the bill and I'll train you,
and in return, you'll work for me forever. She asked.
Jim laughed. She felt a little annoyed by that, and
it must have shown on her face because he stopped. Sorry, sorry,
he said, It's just that'd be dead slavery. You must
not know this, but helped kill the last country that

(01:27:01):
lived on this land in that sort of thing. So
how much time would I owe you, Sasha asked, five years,
he said. Sasha's heart trembled with excitement at the offer.
When she thought about the way the adrenaline had coursed
through her during the fight in the clinic, she wanted
to say yes, But when she thought about Darrell bleeding
out next to his car, the shame inside her overwhelmed

(01:27:23):
everything else. Sasha knew she couldn't handle more weights like
that on her conscience. I don't want to kill people,
she said in a tiny voice. Shame dripped from every syllable.
That's fine, Jim said, his grin widening. We always need medics.
You've shown an aptitude for that already. I have a
feeling you'll take well to combat engineering. There's plenty for

(01:27:46):
you to do without pulling a trigger. If I work
for you, Sasha said, I have a feeling I won't
be able to avoid pulling triggers. None entirely, Jim shrugged.
But any shooting you do would be an immediate it
self defense, and you'd have the right to refuse an
emissions that violate your moral code. I know that's important

(01:28:07):
to you. The way he said that last bit set
the hackles on her neck. Arise, Is it not important
to you? She asked, morality? I mean? He swung his
hands out to the side, palms up in a vaguely
Buddhic pose. When I was a young man, not much
older than yourself, I knew a lot of gallant men
who claimed to live by codes of honor. Such things

(01:28:30):
were fashionable in the warrior culture of a Diyan empire.
None of those codes stopped the men I knew from
serving that great beast we called a state. When you
see enough good moral men enable war crimes, you stop
seeing value in the term morality. So what matters to you,
Sasha asked, what do you believe in change? Miss Marian?

(01:28:53):
He smiled, revealing rows of pearly white teeth, the snake
tattoos on his chest and shoulders, writhed in excitement, I
believe in change. I grew up in a time when
the climate changed and my home became a deadly broiler.
Politics changed, and democracy became a dictatorship of capital. For
a time, I believed in the promises of change handed

(01:29:14):
out by progressive politicians and scent of old revolutionaries. But
every one of them was either co opted by the
system or killed by it. He shrugged and cast his
eyes down to the carpet for a while, just a
moment his mask slipped, Sasha saw a deep, yawning pit
of despair in the tight lines at the edge of
his lips, and the subtle twitch of muscles below his

(01:29:35):
left eye. It passed, and a black velvet smile took
its place. Then I met a man who showed me
the way. Nothing new could grow on this continent until
the weeds of the old were pulled out by the
root and tossed into the compost pile of history. So
he said, forget the old debates about what system should

(01:29:56):
replace capitalism. Kill the state, and the seeds of a
OUs the new worlds will sprout on its corpse. You've
seen two of those sprouts already, Sasha shook her head.
If you're referring to the heavenly kingdom, it's a nightmare.
The old Us can't have been worse than that, Jim shrugged.
Depends on your perspective. I suppose tell miss Sasha, you

(01:30:19):
left the Amphid, the old u SA's most direct successor state.
Why was that? Because it's a soulless pit, She said,
the words almost leaping from her throat. Jim smiled at that.
This isn't though, is it? He gestured out at the
city of wheels below them. No, Sasha said, whatever else

(01:30:39):
it was, rolling fuck was not soulless. Nada is the
Navajo nation, Jim said, or Cascadia the black Stone Nation.
Even the moments are up to some interesting things these days,
one faction at least. So which do you believe in?
Who do you fight for? He grinned again, Night the child,
As I told you, I fight for change, to cast

(01:31:02):
down the ossified bones of the old world and make
space for the new. I owe allegiance to no national
god save perhaps Lady Airis, who he smiled. A bit
of smugness leached into the expression. She could see it
clear as day right around his eyes. It should have
repelled her more than it did. Heiris was the Greek

(01:31:23):
goddess of discord, back when people cared about what the
Greeks believed. She set the spark that lit the Trojan walk.
I know it's a bit sillier reaching back to that
old mythology, but I can't help myself. There's something about
those old gods that calls to me. I can identify
with them. He leaned in. There was an eagerness to

(01:31:44):
his posture, his tone, his eyes. The snakes jerked and
spun on his muscled chest and arms. I'm offering you
a chance to join us on Olympus. Dear Sasha, you've
spent your time in worship. It's time to embrace your
own godhead, lee of your antique books behind, and rewrite
the world with your will. I don't know if that's

(01:32:06):
what I want, Sasha said in a still small voice.
She tried to ignore how much part of her ached
for what he promised. The thought of killing again nauseated
her as much as it excited her. But the thought
of having power, the kind of power she'd seen Roland
exercise that was intoxicating. She hated how badly she'd started

(01:32:27):
to want it. Well, you don't have to decide now.
Jim shrugged his shoulders and gave an amiable smile. The
floor rumbled underneath them. There was a loud clattering wine
as the whole structure of Rolling Fuck came to a
slow stop. Jim waited for the scrunching noise to cease
and said, come and watch what we do today, then

(01:32:48):
make you call Rowland. Dawn broke just as Rolling Fuck
pulled to a long, slow stop by the shore of
Lake Wago. The city had taken the long way around
the reservoir, which had added at least an hour to
their journey, but also put a sizeable water barrier between
Rolling Fuck and the advancing forces of the Heavenly Kingdom.

(01:33:10):
It had been a tight fit at several points, and
Roland had enjoyed watching the wheeled city crunch over several
abandoned homes in many a street lamp. But eventually the
pilots and navigators had found a suitably large public park
and brought Rolling Fuck to rest there. It's a nice sunrise,
Manny said. The kids stood next to Rowland on a
wooden deck built onto the side of the main roller Skofucker.

(01:33:32):
Mike had assured them this spot provided the best advantage
point to watch the rising sun. It looked like he'd
been right on that. The sky around them was a
heavy blend of red and orange that brought up fragmented
memories of my ties and fireballs and Roland's head. Clouds
clustered at the top of the horizon ripe to bursting
with the color and light of the new days sun.

(01:33:52):
Roland nodded. Yeah, the shame no one who lives here
gets to see it. Manny said, I've never seen the
city this empty. Roland looked over at his young friend.
The boy had seen a lot for his age, and
Roland could see how much it pained him. Sorrow had
assent all its own. The plunging levels of nora panephren
and serotonin brought out the sharp stink of cordozol in

(01:34:13):
the greasy odor of opioids. Lurking just below those smells
was the odd, spicy tinge of the I L eighteen protein.
Roland could almost hear it weaken the valves of Manny's heart.
I imagine this sucks extra much for you. I mean,
you've been where they are right twice, Manny said. Roland
nodded again, exactly recall, he admitted. But I expect I

(01:34:36):
had something to do with the first time Manny looked
over to Roland, chemically, it was clear the kid was
battling a maluge of sadness, trauma, and anxiety. His actual thoughts, though,
were just as hidden from Roland as they would be
from any stock human, perhaps more so. There were moments
when Roland feared he was losing the ability to read
human emotions or even display them properly on his face.

(01:35:00):
Was that look you've given me? He asked? Finally, what
do you mean? I can't tell what a look on
your face means, Roland explained, And I'm curious. Are you
angry at me? Manny shrugged, and then he sighed. His
shoulders slumped, his head drooped forward and down just a bit. No,
he said, I'm not angry. What would I even be

(01:35:23):
angry about? If you can't remember what you did back?
Then are you even the same person who did those things?
And even if you are, maybe you were doing the
right thing. I assume someone was at some point in
that fucking mess of a war. Maybe everyone was, Roland offered.
I know the heavenly Kingdom think what they're doing is right.
Manny said, I also don't give a shitting dick what

(01:35:43):
they think they're murderers. They can all sit and spin.
You're confident in me murdering the lot of them? Is
there anything to do? Then? I'm confident it's better than
letting them win, Manny said. Roland nodded quietly and stared
out at the rising sun. The red had faded and
the orange had grown rider He could see the shape
of the sun behind the clouds missed rose off the

(01:36:04):
field in front of the man. Across the lake, a
low light fog rolled in over what appeared to be
an old golf course. You're probably right about that, Roland said,
But where does it end. It ends when they're beaten
and Austin is safe. Manny's words were forceful, but he
looked down and away from Roland when he spoke. You

(01:36:24):
know that's not true, Roland said. I forget my own
name a lot of the time, and I still know
you're full of it killing these fox buys Austin time,
and probably not a lot of it. There are still
millions of guns and millions of piste off desperate people
in this ragged chunk of country. So what are you saying, Roland?
It'd be better to just let the one place around
here that isn't terrible get eaten by darkness, no, Roland said,

(01:36:48):
but read the writing on the damn wall this place.
He waved a hand out in a gesture that encompassed
the whole horizon is fucked. Don't stay here and die
with it. Manny crossed his arms in front of himself
and leaned forward onto the railing of the deck. His
head slumped into his hands, and he was quiet for
a while. Roland knew the army of the Heavenly Kingdom

(01:37:08):
was less than forty miles distant. The scent of that
vast ramshackle horde had grown more prominent over the last
few minutes. His nose took in the stink of diesel,
the ozone odor of discharging batteries, and the cumulative reek
of hundreds of vehicles worth of engine oil. Behind those
prominent smells lurked the foul gangren, a stench of ten
thousand men, sweating fear and stress out of every pore.

(01:37:31):
Roland looked down over the deck and onto the yellow
grass that led up to the shores of the lake.
The warriors of Rolling Fock had started to assemble themselves. There,
a large group of men and women had started to
unpack dozens of quadrafracts. The four legged robots had been
built by Boston Dynamics back before the fall of the
Old US. They'd been meant to ferry men and equipment

(01:37:52):
up steep Afghan mountain sides. Roland stared at them, and
he stalked through the lab, a razor sharp machete in
one hand and a machine pistol in the other. The
air reeked of blood ahead of him. He could smell
the fierce weat wafting off two engineers as they hid
beneath an overturned metal table. Pieces of robotic equipment were
scattered on the floor. Roland reached out his senses and

(01:38:14):
felt that these were the last two people alive in
the facility. He stepped forward, swinging his blade in an
arc that he knew would end in flesh. Roland shook
his head and pulled himself out of the past. The
flashes of memory were growing more frequent. Guilt came with them.
It took some effort to force his mind to focus
again on the world around them. Roland looked back out

(01:38:35):
at the mustering yard. Warriors dawned armor, a fantastic array
of old fashioned polished steel plate mail, ultra modern powered
body armor, antique flack vests, and a significant number of costumes.
He watched a man in armor that mixed the aesthetic
of a polish winged hussar with an Imperial stormtrooper help
a woman in a crop top Neil green GIEI suit

(01:38:56):
as she locked a pair of rocket launchers onto the
flanks of one of the four leg at robots. Over
to his left, another group of warriors had started to
assemble the city's vehicle pool. Ramps had descended from garages
in the bellies of the rollers. A slow, steady stream
of armored vehicles motored their way down the ramps and
into the ragged lines on the field. The bulk of
rolling Fox vehicles were either modified a PCs or armored

(01:39:19):
motorcycles sporting portable field guns or automatic grenade launchers on
side cars. There were tactical arguments for the use of
such vehicles in open field combat, of course, but Rowland
suspected they had mainly been picked because they were fun
to drive. Almost every vehicle's engine had been souped up
well beyond any potential battlefield benefit. Most of them also
had nitrous oxide tanks, although Roland suspected those were more

(01:39:42):
for huffing than they were for speed. Where did they
get all this stuff, Manny asked Roland. I had no idea,
Roland said, But when the old government fell left behind
a lot of equipment, basses and basses full of mothballed ordinance.
I guess as these guys got in early before the
rush and grabbed what they could good. At that moment,
Roland caught sasha scent moving down one of the spindles

(01:40:04):
above the main roller. His hind brain guessed she was
headed to the deck he and Manny occupied. Roland couldn't
smell Jim, who was good at staying hidden, but he
knew that Sasha couldn't have known where they were on
her own. That meant Jim had likely sniffed Manny out
and made the same assumption about Roland's location that Rowland
had made about Jim's. It wasn't long before the sliding

(01:40:25):
metal door slid open and Jim and Sasha walked out
onto the deck. Jim was in his familiar battle gear,
his blood red chaps almost shone in the blinding light
of the morning sun. He had a smug self satisfied
grin and gigantic pupils that spoke of recent drug use.
Beside him, Sasha looked disheveled and exhausted but jittery. He
could smell the coffee wafting from her pores. Hey fuck nuts,

(01:40:49):
Roland said, Hey, Sasha. She looked confused for a moment.
Jim just nodded and said, hey, shit bird, Hey manny
Manny waved vaguely at them, without turning his head to
eat them. He continued to look out at the army
assembling in the field. It's a pretty cool showdown there,
Roland said. I kind of wish I had some dissociatives
and maybe a blunt. Now would be the time for one.

(01:41:11):
Ah she, Jim said, Just so happens, I got both.
He stepped up alongside Rowland, extended his full arm, and
then tapped his left index finger to the back of
his right hand. The tip of that finger detached and
rolled up onto his knuckle. A line of white powder
poured out onto the back of Jim's other hand. He
offered it to Roland. Sure, Roland said, and railed the line.

(01:41:34):
Ketamine wasn't Roland's favoritest of drugs. He preferred m x
C if he was going to snort a dissociati event.
In all honesty, a big bottle of d x M
heavy cough syrup mixed with vodka was even more his speed.
But hey, drugs was drugs. Once Roland had finished, Jim
poured out another line and offered it to Manny. No thanks,
said the fixer. It's pretty good stuff, Roland said, in

(01:41:56):
a helpful tone. Ketamine goes well with unspeakable violence. Might
be fun to watch the battle that decides the future
of your people from inside a cahole. Manny looked defended.
Roland shrugged. He glanced at Jim, who gave him an
I don't know why you're looking at me. Look, I'll
try some, Sasha said, I mean, fuck it, why not?

(01:42:17):
It was a little cute how she stumbled over the fuck.
Roland found it in daring. It seemed Manny did too.
The cocktail of dopamine, testosterone, at oxytocin that waffed it
off and made his feelings as clear as day. Hell yeah, girl,
Jim said, with an exaggerated Southern twang. Get all over
here and rail this. That means snorted, Roland said, helpfully.

(01:42:38):
Sasha approached Jim's arm. She looked him in the eye,
then looked over to Roland, and last to Manny. Then
she stared down at the powder as if she was
hoping it would say something to her. It didn't, but
she leaned in any way and snorted about half of
it before she sneezed and then wretched, and then staggered
to the side of the deck and vomited over the side.
Jim and Roland laughed in your joy. Manny, being a

(01:43:01):
good person, moved to hold her hair back and help
her deal with the pukey aftershocks. While the humans engaged
with their frailties, Roland and Jim did a couple more
lines each. That was terrible, Sasha said. A few minutes later, heah,
Jim chuckled, It takes some getting used to, and then
the door slid open again. Skullfucker. Mike walked out onto

(01:43:22):
the deck. Boy ass hats, he called out, We're about
to war up. You should get down to the field
as app if you want to see the face taking
what Manny asked, Excuse me, Sasha said. At the same time,
Mike just laughed and clapped them both on the shoulders.
I'll explain down in the field. Get a move on.
He nodded to Sasha and added, there's a puke wash

(01:43:43):
station just inside into the right, next to the bathroom. Right.
Jim rubbed his hands together in excitement. Why don't you
kids go roll with skull fucking Mike. I've got to
get rolland up to my mechanics so we can suit
him up. Roland didn't like the eagerness in Jim's eyes
or the excitement in his voice when he said that
there was something indecent about it. But a promise was

(01:44:05):
a promise, so Roland nodded and gave Manny a little
squeeze on the shoulder. I'll see you soon, buddy, This
won't take long, Manny. Schoolfucker Mike Manny asked as the
chromed man led them through the gantries and towards the elevator.
What exactly is so special about Roland? I mean, he's
a nice guy, but what makes him so much scarier

(01:44:27):
than the other chromed folks like you and Topaz? What
do you know about Roland's past? Mike asked? In return,
very little Manny admitted he doesn't seem to remember much
I've sussed out that he was in the army back
before the revolution. He's talked about fighting in Turkey, but
also in Dallas and Denver and a bunch of other
American cities. Mike nodded, Yeah, we met in Dallas back

(01:44:50):
before it was Muerta. I had just been dishonorably discharged
from the Marine Corps for He frowned, shook his head,
and continued, it doesn't matter what. For I was broke
and I had a body fellow, Uncle Sam's chrome. He
wanted it back. I wound up taking shelter in the
White Rock Commune. Roland was there too. He was pretty
political back in those days, always quoting baccoon In and

(01:45:13):
Asealon and Red John. Did you guys actually know Red John?
Sasha asked. Up until that point, she'd walked quietly in
the rear of their little group. The few times Manny
had glanced back, she'd had her head down, stuck in
her own little world. But now she was alert and engaged.
Many guessed it was hearing the name of the famous
revolutionary that had done it. That's odd, he thought. I

(01:45:35):
never met the guy, Mike said, But Rowland did. He
was in real deep with that whole circle. So was
that weird fucker Jim. I was tight with Roland, but
I've never gotten to the political side of things. I
liked smashing stuff and they needed stuff smashers. How does
this relate to why Rowland's Rowland? Manny asked, Well, I've
known old Roland for a while mag when he was

(01:45:57):
still fully himself. He was always cage about his background.
But we had our theories, and mine was that he'd
been part of Project Orange. What was that, Sasha asked,
Holy fuck? Manny said he'd heard of Project Orange, although
he wasn't surprised Sasha hadn't. The am FED was the
closest descendant of the old United States. They'd have kept

(01:46:19):
most of the bad stuff out of their history books. Well,
you know, Mike said. Through the twenties, the military struggled
with declining enlistment numbers. All the little resource wars climate
change sparked created a need for a capable, nimble force
that could project power without requiring a public commitment of force.
So back in the late thirties, the U. S Military
started fucking hard with gene editing tools and bio mods.

(01:46:43):
At first, it was just basic upgrades to select combat units.
Early versions of the healing suites, y'all both have now.
Then they moved on to carbon fiber laced bones, bullet
resistant skin, nanohaling suites. The end result was Project Orange,
the best warriors in the whole military loaded down with
experimental self adapting, neural and physiological upgrades. Yeah, man he added,

(01:47:05):
it was a real success, right till they wiped out
a whole city. Schofucker. Mike nodded and looked back to Sasha.
He's talking about the Battle of Inserlik. I've heard of that,
Sasha said. A US air strike hit a giant munition's cache.
Like ten thousand people died. Schofucker. Mike gave a noncommittal grunt.
There was one version of the story, he said. The

(01:47:27):
story I heard, the story everyone told back then, is
that it was Project Orange. They blew up a city.
Sasha asked, they didn't blow it up. Manny said, they
just butchered everyone, mostly in hand to hand combat. The
DARPA guys miscalculated. Mike nodded to Manny. They entirely revamped

(01:47:47):
the endocrine systems of these soldiers and made them immune
to exhaustion and gave them perfect situational awareness, but it
also made bloodshed. He trailed off and frowned while he
searched for his next word, A dick dive. So what
happened to Project Orange, Sasha asked, Well, said Mike, The
scientists did with scientists do. They refined things. They revised

(01:48:10):
their hypotheses and tweaked their creations until the Joint chiefs
had another job for the Orange team. They must have
done well for a while, and Sir Luke was thirty
nine and no one heard shipped from them until forty one,
when they hit that protest in Denver, six hundred dead,
Manny said, reciting the facts he'd memorized a half dozen
times during his elementary education, including a sitting senator. They

(01:48:32):
reached the lift doors, which slid open once they got close.
Sasha and Manny stepped in first, and Mike came after them.
He fiddled with the control screen on the wall for
a moment. I'm just making sure this thing is set
to normal human speeds. We don't want any more puke
from yall today, Mike winked at Sasha. As the lift
doors closed, there was a soft clump sound, and Manny
felt the lift descend, So yeah, schoolfucker, Mike continued. The

(01:48:56):
President deployed the Orange Team against a fortified camp that
had blocked off access to most of downtown Denver. They
cleared out the camp sure enough. After the bloodbath, some
hackers with a Jesture collective took close to a terabyte
out of the Pentagon servers. It contained a few files
on Project Orange and a partly redacted report on the
Insurlic massacre. And then Sasha asked, Mike shrugged. Then they disappeared.

(01:49:20):
They weren't used during the revolution, and they'd have been
pretty damn handy for the old US. At a couple
of points midway through the war, we recovered some intel
that they'd been wiped out some terrible accident in orbit.
Only only Roland Manny said softly, yep, skullfucker. Mike nodded.
That was certainly my suspicion, still is, But the fucker's

(01:49:40):
never confirmed it or denied it, not that he remembers
now Anyway. The lift reached the ground with a gentle bump.
Its doors slid open to reveal an army six hundred
people in three large clumps out by the shore of
Lake Waco. To the left was the city's vehicle pool.
In the center where the infantry but decked in a
ridiculous melange of medieval weaponry, small arms and handheld field artillery.

(01:50:03):
And then to the right were the quadrifracts. The sight
of them took Manny's breath away. There were well over
a hundred of the strange horse like robots. Most of
them were still being fussed over by the riders, having
bolts tightened, weapons belted on to their chassis, or, in
a few cases old timy leather saddle strapped onto their backs.
Manny saw one saddle with what looked like a large

(01:50:24):
purple dildo attached to it. The quadrifract riders were the
most uniform group of warriors on the field. While rolling
Fox infantry wore everything from Roman legionary armor to bikinies
made of bullets, the cavalry wore nothing. Even from here
he could see that every nipple in the group was
as hard as diamond. They were all covered in the
same sort of led tattoos that Jim wore, but where

(01:50:47):
his took the form of ever writhing snakes, theirs appeared
in blotches of gray black static all up and down
their bodies. What are they, Sasha asked, voicing Manny's thoughts too.
The elite skullfucker, Mike said. The best of the city's
warriors real tough motherfucker's mostly former soldiers who logmened their
government issue upgrades way back in the day. Some of

(01:51:10):
em have five or ten thousand hours of combat experience
stored in their bodies. Why aren't you out there, Mannie asked, Eh,
he grunted. Quadfracts make my ass look big. Besides, Tobez
is a sniper. She keeps to the rear and I
keep to her. It's not as fun as fuckin shoot
up at the fronty front. His lips curled up into
a wistful smile. But we all got to grow up sometime.

(01:51:32):
While Sasha and Manny gawkeed, the main roller's other lift descended.
The doors opened just twenty feet to their right. Nanni
Yazzi was the first one out. She moved slowly. Some
of that was surely due to her advanced age, but
there was also a note of ritual to her movements.
It was something in the arc of her spine, the
cadence of her step, the way she held her head.

(01:51:53):
The enormous gold bladed knife in her hand didn't hurt either.
Behind her walk the citizens of Rolling Fuck. There were
around fifty of them in the lift, but as that
group walked forward, ropes and ladders began to roll out
from all around the enormous wheeled city. Within a matter
of minutes, hundreds and hundreds of people had descended. More
continued to disgorge from the lifts. Under the main roller

(01:52:15):
and the rear roller. The riders had all formed into
ordered ranks. They stood at something very much like a
military attention. It was the only time he'd seen posthumans
do anything in an orderly fashion. Nanni Yazi stood in
front of the cavalry, and the human civilians clustered behind
her in a big semicircle. The other warriors gathered behind them.
Mike maneuver their little group to a hill that overlooked

(01:52:38):
the whole scene. It took almost twenty minutes for the
entire city to gather. What are they doing, sculp fucker, Mike,
Sasha asked, only stumbling a bit over the curse word
and his name. This is what I wanted you to see,
he replied, She's about to take their faces. Rowland the
process of getting ready for war. The bile rise up

(01:53:01):
in his gut. That was curious. Roland's stomach didn't still
produce bile, not the same kind of violet had when
he was human. It had been years since his nervous
system had been natural enough to respond to anxiety with
any kind of physical symptom, and yet there it was.
The bile, or the hallucination of bile, curdled at the
bottom of his stomach while Jim's men strapped him into

(01:53:22):
the murder suit. The armor they'd constructed was altogether different
from the powered armor he'd faced a few days ago
in Dallas. It was also different from what little he
remembered of the armor he'd warned as an American soldier.
That made sense, of course. Roland's wet waar got better
with time and experience. Gear did not age so well.
He watched while Sardar bolted a gauntlet into place over

(01:53:44):
his left forearm. In hand, he could tell it was
made of boron nitride carbon tubes, but the weapon's blister
carried a sextette of tiny rockets that were not familiar
to him. Sar, what are these things? A smile split
the little man's dark handsome features. Scatter rocklets, he said
with relish. Each of them contains twelve guided solid fuel warheads.

(01:54:07):
The left hand or all anti personnel built to blow
up big the right hand rockets. He tapped the second countlet,
which sat on the work table next to him. Those
pack a tiny bronze dart. One will penetrate a Leopard
Mark five's front armor. No problem. Roland's side and looked
around at the Workshop of Death that Jim had flown
out here. From the outside, it had looked a bit

(01:54:27):
like a shipping container, but painted a glossy white. Its
edges were rounded and smooth, and the whole thing looked
slick enough that it could have been an apple product.
Inside the box was wall to wall weaponry in armor
Jim's personal stash. Roland couldn't actually name any of the
weapons inside. Most were similar enough to older weapons systems
that he could make an educated guess as to their capabilities,

(01:54:51):
but there were strange new things on the walls that
he'd never seen before. Jim sat in a comfy chair
at the rear of the workshop and watched Sardar work
while he sipped Scotch out of an enormous ram's horn.
So this so, is this like your man cave or what?
Roland asked him. Jim took a deep gulp and then smiled.
I find it relaxes me, he said. I spent a

(01:55:14):
lot of time carried in this collection over the years.
I spent a lot of time working on that suit, too,
So don't fuck it up. Something tingled at the back
of Roland's mind. The suit had clearly been built to
his specifications. That suggested Jim had been planning this for
a while, but Roland had been retired at Cameltoe until
very recently. So how hey, man, I need your port

(01:55:36):
Sardar said. The squat mechanic held up a pair of
fiber optic cables that terminated in peculiar boxy plugs. Not
unlike old ethernet cable they were connected to a metal
breastplate on the table. Roland pointed to a pair of
lumpy white scars on his lower back. The input sockets
are in there. They've scarred up. You'll have to cut
him back open, but it should fit. But it should

(01:55:57):
still fit. The nice thing about DARPA engineering that a
little bit of blood and skin never gets in the way.
Sardar set to work carving the sockets back open. Roland
felt the pain as a distant sort of itch. He
was having a hard time focusing his senses on his
immediate surroundings. The smells of the advancing army presented an
almost overpowering flood of data. Roland had loaded up on

(01:56:19):
ketamine and vodka to quiet his hindbrain, but all that
interfered with his introspection. He built this thing for me
to wear. Jim, how long have you been planning this? Yes,
Jim said, His forthrightness surprised Roland. Your pacifism is a mistake,
Jim continued, brought on by your overactive conscience. There is

(01:56:39):
still so much you need to do in the world.
I figured at some point you'd realize that yourself, so
I kept my men working. Sardar lifted the heavy metal
breastplate up over Roland's head and settled it over his shoulders.
The weight was comforting. A cold electric shock ran through
his body as the armor connected to his central nervous system.

(01:57:00):
Roland felt parts of himself wake up that he hadn't
truly realized were asleep. Something in him had missed that feeling,
and he felt guilty for that. I'm taking this thing
off the instant. The fight's over, Jim. You wasted your money.
Jim smile only deepened. You've forgotten how fun it is, Rowland,
and you've forgotten what it is like to be a

(01:57:20):
fucking human. Roland countered, Have you always been a sociopath?
Is this what I was like back before whatever took
my memories? Jim's amused, smiled and shift by so much
as a nanometer. Roland felt a spike of irritation before
he was distracted by Sardar. Raise your hand, please, the
mechanic said. He lifted a four barreled machine gun on

(01:57:40):
a circular frame and slid it around Roland's right arm.
Sardar bolted the weapon into place while he explained it's
a stack charged machine gun magnetically fired, similar to the
old metal storm weapons. But this fucker's capable of putting
out twenty thousand rounds per second. How long an a fire,
Sardar laughed, but less than this second. The mechanic turned

(01:58:01):
back to his table, and Roland tried to direct his
wandering mind back to the conversation with Jim. You're going
to love it, his old friend said, I know you've
been lovin' it when you've fought your way out of
that citia. I could smell the dopamine waftin off your
brain from all the way out here. Sardar snapped a
queasts around Roland's thigh. The armor also sported a bulky

(01:58:23):
weapons blister on its outside edge gas grenade launcher. The
mechanic explained, should co great with all the frag rocklets.
Uh so we're committing war crimes now, Roland asked Jim,
with more indignation than he really felt. Jim rolled his eyes.
Is just he a gas? He said, mostly? At least
I may have included some aerosolized L S D in there.

(01:58:44):
I've been on a big psychochemical warfare kicked lately. For
a little while, Sardar worked in silence, Jim drank and
Roland stared near him, but not at him. The self
inflicted haze in his head had cleared a bit. That
meant his hind brain grew louder. By now it was
all but shouting about the approaching army. Roland felt a
trickle of adrenaline, oxytocin, and endorphins. His left hand twitched involuntarily.

(01:59:09):
He felt the power of the weapons system around him,
and he felt the power in his own body. Something
like a rousal gripped him. Roland fought it down as
best he could, but it lingered there at the edge
of his consciousness. I've been remembering more, he said to Jim,
as much to distract himself as out of a desire
to get it off his chest. Jim cocked an eyebrow

(01:59:31):
in interest. I've had a few big flashes of memories.
Once when we drove into Dallas, past the side of
the Lakewood Blast, I remembered. He locked eyes with Jim,
and Jim nodded back his eyes said, I know so,
Roland moved on. The memories come most intensely when I'm
in combat. I remembered hiking with Topez. I remembered burning

(01:59:52):
the TAZ in Denver. I got flashes of you and
me in Mexico, and a lot more. I'm still certain
through it. It's confus using because there's no timeline for
any of this, just associated memories I know happened. At
some point, Jim leaned forward, his eyes flashed with excitement. Interested,
he said, tell me. Have you been able to draw

(02:00:14):
any conclusions about who you were from what you've remembered?
Have you gotten any insight into the old Roland? Roland frowned.
He'd been so focused on trying to remember his old
life that he hadn't given much thought to what the
memories he had said about the man he'd been. As
he pondered, Roland's mind lingered on the memory of shooting
the chainey boy in the back of the head. I

(02:00:35):
think I used to be a lot more like you,
Roland said. Jim grinned, his lips curled up to reveal
long rows of white, straight teeth. That's true, he said,
Why else do you think I've missed you so much? Sasha?
A part of Sasha had believed that after the Heavenly Kingdom,

(02:00:57):
nothing she saw would ever shock her again. That part
of her was proven wrong when Nana Yazzi's aged arthritic
hand began to messily carve at the first warrior's face.
Her target was the young woman with the chrome hawk
Sasha had seen in the war council. The carving was
a messy thing. It took the better part of a
minute for her to slice and peel the skin free.

(02:01:18):
Sasha noticed that there was very little blood. It was messy,
but not as messy as it should have been. Once
she was finished, Nana Yazzi stepped back with the woman's
face in her hand. As she did, dozens of citizens
stepped forward. They pulled out daggers, swords, straight razors, and
switch blades of their own. Each civilian paired off with
a warrior and began to carve. Some of them were

(02:01:40):
quick and practiced. The motion of their hands reminded Sasha
of an autopsy video she'd watched in one of her
pre met classes, but the other citizens were cruder with
their cutting. A few verged on brutal hacking and slashing
at the faces and necks of their persons. None of
the post human warriors showed any signs of pain or discomfort.
They just stood, unmoving and without their faces, seemingly without emotion.

(02:02:06):
I don't understand, Sasha said. She hadn't expected to say
it out loud, The words just slipped out. It's a
symbolic thing, scoffucker Mike explained. Before they leave, the city's
warriors give up their identities to the group. They leave
their humanity behind, and bloody tatters in the hands of
their friends and loved ones. It's a way of making

(02:02:26):
sure the city civilians don't leave a war without blood
on their hands. And it makes em look fucking terrifying,
someone said from behind them. Sasha turned around. A short,
fit man approached them. He had a thin build, but
his body was girded with lithe muscle. There was something
familiar about his face, the short mop of curly black
hair atop his head. The man smiled when Sasha saw him,

(02:02:49):
revealing pointed metallic fangs. Hey wait a second, Low, Topez scoffucker,
Mike said. Manny looked shocked as well. He stared at
the man in surprise. Topaz, what happened? There was a
woman with those exact same teeth yesterday when we arrived
at the city. Sasha hadn't gotten a woman's name, but
she'd borne a striking resemblance to this man. I felt

(02:03:12):
like a man to day, Topaz said, what with the
war and all? Sasha finally realized what had happened. Of course,
she thought these people can change their physiology on a dime, Ah,
Manny said with a nod schofucker. Mike walked up to Topaz,
and the two embraced and then kissed. They twined their
arms together, and a few seconds later, Topaz seemed to

(02:03:33):
finally notice Sasha's presence. Sorry, he smiled as he spoke.
But I don't believe I got your name, Sasha, Saschamarian.
Topaz stepped closer. Well, Sascha Maarian, he said, in a
low voice, How are you liking? Are strange ways and customs?
They're interesting? Sasha said diplomatically. Do you find this place

(02:03:55):
more to your liking than the heavenly Kingdom? Topaz stepped closer.
Sasha took a step back and then another. The man's
expression was friendly enough, but there was a sort of
queer menace in the set of his shoulders. It may
have had something to do with the very large rifle
slung across his back. Sasha started to sweat. Fear gripped
her mind. Topaz back off, schoolfucker. Mike's voice was devoid

(02:04:18):
of anger, but firm. You're scaring her. Topaz stopped and
stared at Mike. His expression went from placid smile to rage,
and then back to a smile, almost faster than Sasha
could process. Sorry, darling, he said in an artificially chipper voice.
I just wanted to make sure our guest was enjoying
her stay here. He looked to Sasha again. You are,

(02:04:39):
aren't you? Yes, good, Topaz purred, Hopefully you won't be
joining any more extremist groups to get my friends killed.
He turned immediately to Manny, and with barely a pause
for breath, embraced him and kissed his forehead. I'm proud
of you, buddy, as far as I'm concerned your family.
Manny mumbled his thanks and returned the hug, but he

(02:05:00):
glanced at Sasha and they shared a what the hell look?
Skullfucker Mike seemed to want a plaster over the awkwardness. Yep,
he said, We've made some wonderful friends these last couple
of days. He pantomime looking down at his watchless wrist
and checking the time. Oh my goodness, he said, in
mock surprise. Look at the time, Topez, We've got a
war to get to. You kids had better find some

(02:05:22):
decent seats. Topaz smiled at skullfucker Mike, his eyes lingered
on the big man's face and then drifted back to Sasha.
Enjoy the show, he said, with an empty smile, Rowland.
It was windy. On the landing pad. He and Jim
stood next to a heavy black feetoll aircraft, the steed

(02:05:43):
that would carry him into today's massacre. Roland could taste
the dying summer and the faint stirrings of a North
Texas fall in the air. It was cooler than he'd
have expected this time of the year, grayer too. A
gust of chill wind blew across his face, and Roland
found himself fall ling back in time again. He was shorter,
The world seemed sharper, even though his senses were dim

(02:06:05):
and unenlightened. Roland felt a hand abound his own. It
felt big, powerful, and comforting. He looked up and saw
a woman standing over him. She was tall, a giant.
Her hair was brown and straight and long and clear
as day in his mind's eye, but her face was blank,
obscured even in memory. His head turned to track the
passage of a blowing leaf. He felt chill winter air

(02:06:25):
on his arm, and he watched as a red sedan
rumbled past them, straining water into the airs and had
a puddle on the asphalt. Rowland pay attention. Jim's voice
snapped him back to reality. The other chrombed man held
a paper thin table in front of Roland's face. That
memory flash had been the most immersive yet, although not
the longest. He was a little confused at that why

(02:06:46):
that moment had it just been the similarity in weather
or Rowland? Jim was angry. It was actually somewhat refreshing
to see genuine emotion on the other man's post human face.
Veins bulged at his neck and his eyes were fully open.
Roland caught a harsh whiff of methamphetamine from his breath. Alright, alright,
fucking chill, Roland muttered, what am I looking at? He

(02:07:07):
needn't have asked. Once he focused on the tablet, it
was obvious that it displayed a map of the area
around Lake Waco. Rolling Fox warriors and vehicles were displayed
in little blue pinpoints. Jim scrolled up a few inches
and Roland saw a swarm of red. It was half
over the Brazos right now, and it crept millimeter by
millivater towards their position. The river slowed him down a bit,

(02:07:28):
Jim said, but the bridges there was still in good order.
I'd say they'll hit rock Creak in about ten minutes.
Roland nodded and asked, couldn't we have killed those bridges
bought some hours. Jim gave a careless shrug. Why would
we want to slow him down? We're ready enough, No
sense in dragging this out. There was a strong smell
of ozone as the v Toal aircraft next to them

(02:07:50):
woke up. Red lights glowed on the missile pods slung
under its belly. The chain gun on its nose cycled.
The whole thing hummed with potential energy. It was too
modern for Roland to know the make and model, but
it reminded him of the Russian Coba Assault transport, which
had been state of the art back in the mid forties.
So is the plan, he asked Jim. Well, his friend said,

(02:08:11):
we know they've got at least a half dozen mobile
antie batteries old U s Patriot threes inaccurate garbage. Nothing.
I'm worried about. The name conjured up a ghost of
another memory. A big Patriot battery wheeled around on its
truck sized chassis. He heard the machine whine of the motors,
and then the reek of fear hit his nose, as
rich and heavy as Texas thunder. There were missiles in

(02:08:32):
the air aimed at him as he fell. They were
child's plate at dodge in his suit. He descended, his
fear stink rolled up towards him from the soldiers below.
The poor fucker's Rowland, Jim shouted, I'm not gonna have
to find another murder guerilla to take your place. What No,
Roland shook his head. Sorry, he said, just memories. Jim
gave him a long look and if then you need

(02:08:54):
to talk about right now? No, Roland said, it's just
the memories are coming amy faster now, it's distracting. That
makes sense. Jim said, I'd imagined stimula that reminds you
of your past, could prompt your brain into a sudden healing.
He reached into a bag at his hip. It looked
like a standard dump pouch meant for half spent magazines

(02:09:16):
in the heat of battle, but Jim pulled out a
fully loaded crack pipe. Even unlit, it smelled like burning
tires at a non percent peel. Jim held the pipe
up to Roland. All right. Roland grabbed the pipe and
lifted it to his lips. Jim reached out and flipped
on the lighter built into his index finger. He held
it under the glass bubble of the pipe. The rocks

(02:09:37):
vaporized into white smoke rolland inhaled and felt the vapor
dissolve into his blood stream through his mucus membranes. There
was a tingle as the crack reached his brain's ventral
tegmental area, and said, in essence, you know how much
dopamine you were planning to produce? Make a shipload more
than that. The happy chemicals flooded Roland's mind. His anxiety

(02:09:58):
at the recently churned up memories faded, as did the
memories themselves better. Jim asked, super good, Roland said, can I,
Jim waved, show a man keep the pipe. In fact,
he pulled his index finger free from his hand and
gave it to Roland. Keep that. I'll grow a new one.
Who Roland took the finger, flicked at a light, and

(02:10:18):
took another deep pole of burning crack, so he said,
as he exhaled a plume of crack smoke. The plan right,
said Jim, like I told you, Rock creak is where
we planned to hit him. The Edmund Fitzgerald. Here, Jim
banged a hand on the side of the veetoll craft.
It's gonna take you up to around fifteen thousand feet
and then drop you right on the heads. I expect

(02:10:41):
we'll take some flak afterwards, but this bird can handle it.
And besides, he raised his voice and jerked his head
towards the cockpit. Anderson's piloting it to day, and it's
not like I give a shit if he does. In response,
the nose gun wheeled around on its mount and locked
on to Jim. There was a clinking sound as it
ratcheted around into its chain er. Jim rolled his eyes.

(02:11:02):
Fucking pilots. Anyway, me and my people will be with
the Roland fuck folks getting shot at. He tapped Roland's helmet.
When we're ready for you, I'll ping you both, and
Anderson can drop you on top of the asses. So
Roland asked, I've just got a fall on top of
a hostile army and start shooting. Jim nodded, right, then,

(02:11:22):
let's get started. Manny. Years ago and what now seemed
like another life, Manny had gone to watch an outdoor
movie at Silker Park in Austin Ghostbusters. He was pretty
sure it had been Ghostbusters, hundreds and hundreds of people
had shown up, families with children, and couples on dates,
and so so many dogs. The sound hadn't been great,

(02:11:45):
and the projectionist could have been better, but he remembered
the evening fondly. Rolling fuck before a battle reminded him
of that experience. The people were different. Very few of
them were children, but clusters of citizens, friend groups and
family leaves and families of friends had set up little
viewing nooks across the wheeled city itself and in the
field in front of it. The whole scene would have

(02:12:07):
been idyllic if they weren't about to watch a battle.
The vehicle's cavalry and infantry were already almost out of view.
He could just barely see shapes out on the horizon
setting up firing positions on top of buildings in Rock Creek.
They moved so damn fast. Manny didn't think he'd ever
get used to the pace of post human life. He

(02:12:27):
knew Topaz and Skullfucker Mike were somewhere out there, he
knew where they'd be soon, and in spite of their confidence,
he worried for them more than anyone. He worried for
Roland drinks for everyone. Donald Ferris said he had a
tray full of drinks in his hands, fresh from the bar.
He sat down next to Nanayazi and smiled. Manny and
Sasha sat on the opposite side of them in a

(02:12:49):
booth in the main roller's bar, looking out over Waco.
Donald started handing out beverages, first bubbly drinks in long
brown bottles that smelled familiar Coca cola, the old documentarian said,
not the stuff they still sell all over, the original
recipe with cocaine and alcohol. It's great ship. We go
through gallons of it every day. Nany Yazzi took a

(02:13:11):
sip from hers and smiled. It's quite good, she said,
and the intoxicating effect is mild. Our chromed comrades have
a stronger variant. Of course, we're all humans here. Donald
smiled more or less. Manny took one of the cokes,
sipped it, and nodded to Sasha. It's really good, he said,
you should try it. It was good, and it didn't

(02:13:33):
seem like it was too strong. Minny took another sip
and smiled. As Sasha grabbed her bottle and took a gulp.
She seemed to like it. There was a loud pop
sound from somewhere up above. Minny tinsed up, but then
he tracked its origin to one of the landing pads
that extended from a gantry tower at least a hundred
feet above them. Dozens of small black shapes flitted out

(02:13:53):
from it and soared forward off in the same direction
the army had gone spidrones. Donald Ferris explained, they'll be
at the front by the time the fighting starts. This
all seemed so weird, Sasha said, I think I read
about people doing something similar during the Civil War. They'd
set up picnic blankets on hills overlooking the battle. Donald

(02:14:13):
Ferris grunted and shifted in his seat a bit awkwardly.
Nani Yazzi smiled and said, it is a bit like that.
The difference is that we're not doing this to be voyeurs.
We won't see much fighting. What will we see? Just watch?
Donald Ferris said, and reached for a tiny shot glass
filled with a yellow brown liquid. But ever drink first,

(02:14:34):
it'll help. Manny took one of the shot glasses and
moved to belt it down, but Nanyazzie put her hand
on his. That's fine, te quel, a son, I'd recommend sipping,
so he sipped it, and it was good. The burn
rolled down his throat and mixed with the cocaine and
alcohol from the Coca cola, A comfortable, warm haze settled
over Manny. He was about to encourage Sasha to try

(02:14:56):
some when another sound intruded. The high hum of drone
bones filled the air. Manny fought down an irrational surge
of anxiety. He wasn't sure he'd ever feel comfortable with
the sound of drones again. Each of these drones was
the size and rough density of a rottweiler. They flew
in pairs, connected by what looked like a thick, bindy
white tube that hung between them. Several pairs settled in

(02:15:18):
front of the main roller's bar in a stable hover.
With a whirr and a click, the white tubes in
between them opened up and unfurled into screens. A second later,
the screens lit up. Manny took another sip of truly
fabulous tequila and looked back across his new friends. Donald
Ferris looked somber as Solomon gray as a granite wall.
Nana Yazzi seemed almost excited, as if she'd reached the

(02:15:40):
first jump scare in a good horror movie. Sasha hadn't
touched her liquor. She didn't seem to have taken more
than a few SIPs of the coke. Manny found himself wondering,
what would happen to her after all this? What am
I going to do after this? Manny realized with a
bit of shock that Oscar's wife was the only person
he'd messaged in almost a week. He hadn't sent anything
to his family or his friends back in Austin. He'd

(02:16:03):
had the excuse of his deck being deactivated when he'd
been inside the Kingdom, but now that he was back
and his deck was functional, his lack of communication felt
less and less defensible. Just thinking about Ayisha and the
terrible news he still had yet to deliver brought a
spike of anxiety that was somehow worse than his fear
over the coming battle. There's a certain sound that happens

(02:16:23):
when a large group of people all noticed something at
the same time. That sound shook Manny out of his
contemplation and alerted him to the fact that something had
started to happen on the screens. He looked up, and
he saw that all the screens scattered around the city
and hovering over the field now shared the same images.
One side of the screens displayed a video feed of
a man in full tactical armor, his eyes covered by

(02:16:45):
goggles and his head protected by a black helmet. He
was seated in the coupo law of an armored vehicle
rolling fast over the highway. Next to that video feed
was a picture of the same man, Sam's armor in
more peaceful days. He was fair skinned, with red hair
and an easy smile. He wore a shirt that Manny
guest signified his allegiance to some sports team. In the

(02:17:06):
am fed the images sat there alone for a second.
Manny looked out at the horizon towards Rock Creek, where
Rolling Fox soldiers had embedded themselves. He saw three black
gray contrails rush out from an old office building and
out towards the highway. The Heavenly Kingdom's forces were just
barely visible to his naked eye, tiny ant size tanks

(02:17:27):
and transports. All three rockets hit, and the black smoke
of the detonations obscured the head of the vehicle column.
And then on the video feed, a rocket burst right
above the man in the cupola. Manny watched as he
was torn apart in a hail of shrapnel. The video
and the still image of his smiling face were replaced
a second later by a looping video of an older

(02:17:48):
man playing with a baby girl. He picked her up
and spun her around, and the camera zoomed in on
his joyous smile. Another video played of a younger man
attending his high school graduation. More videos and still images
popped up, displaying gentle moments in the lives of at
least a dozen different men, and then all the screens
cut violently to video of and exploding a PC. Manny

(02:18:11):
jerked back in surprise. He saw that Sasha had reacted similarly.
Nannyazi just sat and stared, her face unreadable. Donald Ferris frowned,
and when he noticed Manny looking back at him, he
waved a gentle hand towards the screen and mouthed the
word watch. Manny turned back to the screens in time
to see them populate with more faces and more looping videos.

(02:18:33):
He watched his children open birthday presents and celebrated graduations.
He saw young men pose with teammates or hug their kids.
He saw pizza parties and Christmas Mornings and laughter and love,
and then another vehicle detonated. The screen cleared, and then
it populated again with scenes from four More Lives next
to video of a detonating Leopard tank. The parade of

(02:18:55):
shattered lives went on as rockets, mortars, and now gunfire
lashed out from Rock Creak and towards the vehicle column.
Rowland isn't even there yet. This is just the beginning,
Manny stared out, numb and queasy, and watched as the
Heavenly Kingdom's armored spearhead changed direction and began the drive
to Rock Creek. They were firing now, too, pouring explosive

(02:19:15):
shot and long range rockets into the neighborhood. This is
what you wanted, he reminded himself, as the parade of
death sped up Rowland. It was downright cold at fifteen
thousand feet. Rowland relished the bite in the air and
stared out the Edmund Fitzgerald's side window. As he hit
Jim's crack pipe for the last time, his synapses bubbled

(02:19:37):
with dopamine. Now he couldn't stop his lips from curling
up into a grin as he looked out onto the
distant fields below. Five minutes to drop point, the pilot's
voice echoed through the cargo compartment. Normally it would have
held an array of smart bombs are close as salt drones.
Today it held only Rowland. He stepped forward towards the
rear bay doors of the craft. The feeling of the

(02:19:58):
cold deck under his feet and the elevated hemoglobin levels
in his blood brought the threat of another rush of
memory to Roland's mind. The dizzy glee of the crack
Hi helped him shrug it off. Combat soon, battle and
battle drugs. He tried to temper his excitement. He didn't
want to crave that high as much as he did.
It'll just take a few seconds, he told himself, and

(02:20:20):
then I can disengage. He could already feel the Heavenly
Kingdom's army far below settling in Their nose had been
bloodied by rolling fox rocketry, but they'd suffered relatively few casualties.
So far. The plan did seem to be working. Dozens
of vehicles and thousands of men had already moved into
position around the Rock Creek neighborhood. Roland could hear the

(02:20:40):
sounds of their mortars, RECOILSS rifles and assault guns opening fire.
He reached out with his senses and tried to find
Topaz and Skullfucker Mike in the mess, but their scents
and heat profiles were obscured by shell fire and smoke.
Roland was able to locate Jim, as well as Bigsby
and his assault team. They were hunkered down at the
edge of the neighbor hood, embedded in an abandoned apartment complex,

(02:21:02):
and engaged in a furious firefight with the Heavenly Kingdom's vanguard.
Roland could smell the dopamine rushing into jim synapses from
fifteen thousand feet in the air. His heart began to
beat faster. He felt his left hand start to shake,
not in fear, but in delirious anticipation of the battle drugs.
Another flash of memory took him, and his hand shook

(02:21:23):
so bad he could barely hold the needle straight. He'd
already missed the vain troice. God damn it, God damn it,
he cursed, before taking a deep breath and preparing himself
to try again. Sixty seconds to drop. The pilot's voice
pulled Roland back into the moment that memory had felt weird.
It had been blurry in his mind's eye, but Roland's
arms and hands had felt smaller than was I shooting
up dope as a teenager? He knew the answer, based

(02:21:45):
on his current predilections, was probably. Roland shook his mind
away from the past and focused again on the war downstairs.
The Kingdom had moved quickly. He guessed around four thousand
of their men were already in position. These would be
the elite, their most veteran fighters, the soldiers wearing power
armor or writing in real armored transports and not up

(02:22:06):
gunned trucks. He could feel the rest of the Kingdom's
army flung out far behind them, in a long tail
that stretched back to the brazos. How many of these
men will die today? How many are already dead? Seconds
his nose caught the distant gasoline wreek of a flamethrower
opening up on a squad of advancing martyrs. That's gotta
be Jim right. Five seconds the jump light turned from

(02:22:29):
red to green, and the bomb bay doors opened with
a rush of air and wind that cracked the uncovered
skin on Roland's face. Three, said the pilot. He stepped
out to the ledge and planted his feet. The world
whipped by around them at a maddening speed. Roland looked down,
focused and saw the Heavenly Kingdom's army underneath him. Dozens
of vehicles and thousands of men had taken up position

(02:22:50):
in a large park and several buildings surrounding Rock Creek.
Two large gatherings of mortars in a trio of Leopard
tanks made up the bulk of the artillery now pouring
fire into rolling Fox forces. There were also several large
field guns and rocket batteries currently being bolted into place
in an old parking lot behind the park. Competent Roland
was impressed by how the Kingdom's soldiers had parked their

(02:23:12):
armored transports to help complete a fortress wall around one
side of Rock Creek. They'd sent a few probing attacks
of power armored troopers, but he could tell they wouldn't
launch a full assault until they'd flattened the neighborhood to
a trickle of endorphins and serotonin joined the soggy mush
of dopamine and roland synapses. He closed his eyes and
with a thought, activated the sundry weapons systems that Sardar

(02:23:35):
had wired into his body. The missiles in their pods hummed,
and the barrels around his right arm chimed in readiness.
Lyrics from a half remembered song flitted across his mind.
Time time, time for another peaceful war. One Roland stepped
off the back of the craft and into the skies.
Embrace Sasha. The faces flashed by, along with video clips

(02:24:01):
and curated posts from social media, and of course, scenes
of death. Some of the men died from sniper fire,
cut down as they ran for cover. Others died in
long range firefights or from shrapnel. The pace of death
had gradually risen over the course of the battle. Some
of that was due to the fact that the martyrs
had sent in several assault teams to test the metal

(02:24:21):
of the defenders. Those men had died fast and badly.
Many of them had been burnt alive. The sight of
it all should have horrified her. She wanted it to
horrify her. Everyone else at the table had tears in
their eyes. Even Nanny Yazzi was crying, and that lady
looked like she'd been through some ship. Since when do
you curse like that? Sasha felt a pang of guilt.

(02:24:42):
At how easily the swear word had come to her mind.
Then she felt really, really stupid. She was literally watching
people die. She'd killed two human beings less than forty
eight hours ago. What the fuck does cursing matter? But
still the guilt was there. Perhaps what she felt was
a betray ill of her past self, or maybe she

(02:25:02):
was just dumb. Sasha shook it off. She tried to
focus on the carnage. It was horrible, she knew that
in a detached, academic sense. She couldn't quite feel the horror, though.
It was as if shooting Darrell had opened up a
great gnawing hole inside her heart, and that whole had
spread like a black film over her entire body. All

(02:25:22):
her feelings seemed so distant now. She wanted to cry
about Darrell. She wanted to cry about this. She wanted
to cry for Susannah and Anne, left alone in that
living hell of a kingdom. She wanted to cry for
herself too, but she couldn't, and so she didn't. Instead,
she sat and watched as the warrior gods of this
strange city helped the martyrs earn their title. Sasha looked

(02:25:45):
out at the citizens of Rolling Fuck, most of the
people she could see were crying, and even those who
weren't looked shaken, horrified. The perpetual party atmosphere she'd come
to associate with the City of Wheels was gone. It
had been suspended to allow for pain. Sasha wanted to
hurt with them, but instead she thought about the offer
that man Jim had made. She thought about the squeaking

(02:26:07):
sound of the razor blade ripping out of Roland's forearm.
She'd seen the way he fought. She longed for the
high that had come with the violence and the clinic,
but she couldn't stand more of the guilt killing Darrell
had brought her. I could be emetic, Sasha thought, Jim
said so. She looked up to the screens again at
the parade of Death. She wasn't sure if any of
the dead had been rolling Fox soldiers. It didn't look

(02:26:29):
like it, But as she settled back in to watch,
something glitched on the screens. The stream of faces sped
up well past the point where she could focus on
any of them. Then the floe stopped, sputtered, the picture
glitched out, and then righted itself. Whatever algorithm handled the
show eventually stabilized and the individual images on each screen
shrank to accommodate many, many more people, a flood of

(02:26:53):
the dead and moments from their lives. The nature of
their deaths changed too. Most of the first waves seemed
to come from a sudden burst of explosive detonations, but
the explosions stopped and the dying continued, and whatever was
killing the martyrs now moved too fast to be clearly seen.
What's happening? She heard Manny, ask, is something wrong? No,

(02:27:14):
the old man said, that's just Rowland. Rowland. Forty five
seconds after his feet hit dirt, Rowland was out of AMMO.
He'd managed to do a tremendous amount of damage in
that short span of time, decimating their mortar batteries with
cluster rockets and clearing the martyrs away from their field

(02:27:34):
guns with a mix of gas and fragmentation grenades. He'd
emptied his machine gun and three long bursts, mostly aimed
at the infantry who had been clustered behind the APC
barricades when he landed. Then he'd taken to scavenging rifles
from the dead and emptying those into targets of opportunity.
By the one minute mark, Rowland's hindbrain estimated he'd killed
or wounded close to a thousand men. The sheer ferocity

(02:27:57):
of his initial assault sent the kingdoms for his reeling
and cleared a circle of ground around him about two
hundred meters wide. Rowland finished gunning down the crew of
a Patriot battery and ran for an abandoned anti tank
rifle lying next to a pile of bodies. Bullets smacked
into him from all sides, diversionary fire meant to distract
him from the uparmored maddess APC that suddenly gunned its

(02:28:19):
engine and barreled towards him. They think they can run
me over, Rowland realized, with something like glee, so he
slowed down, reducing his sprint to something like a normal
human running speed, while the vehicle closed the gap between them.
He jumped at the last moment, landed on the APC's
roof and punched a hole through the top armor with
both of his fists. Then he gripped the ragged metal

(02:28:40):
at the sides of the hole and tore the APC open.
The smell of fear hid his nose as he tore
through the concrete wall. The room held a dozen men,
a mix of guards and officers. One man in the
middle wore the stars of a general in the United
States Army. Some of the soldiers screamed, a few opened fire,
but the general just stood there while Rowland killed. He
didn't even blink. No fear poured off him. It's our fault,

(02:29:03):
the general said once they were the only men left
alive in the room. This is all our fault, Roland time.
A bullet hit his face and Roland snapped back to reality.
The men in the APC below him were dead. It
looked as if he'd shredded them with his bare hands.
But while he'd been lost in a memory, two more
APCs had roared up and disgorged a dozen power armored soldiers.

(02:29:24):
They shot him with big guns, weapons meant to hurt monsters.
He avoided some of their rounds, but not most. Roland
lost the better part of his right hand, a chunk
of his skull in his left knee. It hurt, but
that didn't stop him. He leapt off the maddis and
soon he was among them, ripping off armored plates and
shattering bones with his bare hands. The battle drugs poured

(02:29:45):
into his brain and lit his synapses up like the
New York Skyline. Roland led out a terrible whooping cry
that was half laugh and half scream, and he tore
into the men as they tried in vain to do
him real harm. It took nineteen seconds to elimin ate
them all. As the last man dropped, Roland realized with
some surprise that he could hear Jim's voice, distant but

(02:30:06):
getting closer. His old friend was charging, screaming out war whoops,
and firing those big dumb pistols. Then he heard the
familiar crack of a Dragonov sniper rifle Topaz his rifle.
He remembered it now the sound was as familiar to
him as the voice of his own mother. Holy shit,
Roland realized that for the first time in years, he
could remember the sound of his mother's voice. Her name

(02:30:29):
and face were still lost in memory, but all this
violence was clearly knocking some things loose. He took a
step back behind one of the intact a PC's to
avoid a spray of heavy machine gun fire and take
stock of the situation. Now that he focused, he could
feel the hoofbeats of rolling Fox cavalry. He could sense
that many of the city's infantry had charged out from
their positions in Rock Creek to meet the martyrs in

(02:30:51):
hand to hand combat. The Heavenly Kingdom was not in flight,
not yet, but they would break soon. Roland knew it.
He could smell it in the air. Time to stop, now,
time to let schullfucker, Mike Topaz and the others finished
the fight. He'd done enough, He knew he'd done enough,
and yet the drugs. Even after just a few seconds

(02:31:13):
out of direct combat, the high was starting to fade,
and Roland wanted more. He thought about cracking another skull
in his hand. Itched. He heard one of the martyrs
open up with an automatic grenade launcher and thought about
how good that gun would feel bucking against the meat
of his shoulder. The man with the grenade launcher was close.
Roland could close the distance between them and two maybe

(02:31:34):
three seconds. No, you don't need to do this, stop.
Fewer people will die if you just Roland charged. Manny.
Manny had seen nine people killed by bullets or bombs.
He'd seen a good deal more fresh corpses in the
aftermath of firefights. He had a strong stomach, and he
was not easily distressed by gore. The opening stages of

(02:31:57):
this battle and the war ritual had been on settling,
but not because of the violence that changed soon after
Roland landed. He's just tearing people apart, Manny said, without
really meaning to say anything at all. Donald Ferris replied
with a grim nod. It's hard to watch, Nani Yazzi admitted,

(02:32:18):
as another dozen lives and did messily on the screens
before them. It'll be over soon, though. They can't take
much more of this. I haven't seen any of your
people die yet, Sasha said, Is that abnormal? No. Donald's
voice was grim. There will be a lot of injuries,
but I don't expect rolling fuck will lose a single warrior, good,

(02:32:40):
Sasha said, is it? Donald asked, of course, it's good.
You silly fuck. Nana Yazzi snapped, that was the first
time Manny could recall hearing her angry. I disagree, the
old man grumbled. We're on a precipice here, the edge
of a deep cliff. Every time this happens, we get
a little closer to falling off. What you mean, Manny asked,

(02:33:02):
he means, Nani Yazzi replied with a bit of drunken
slur to her voice. He doesn't trust the people of
this city. He thinks they'll get a taste for war,
and this whole experiment will turn into a nightmare. You
can't trust the dark, Donald Ferris insisted, And we're in
the dark here, he waved out at the field and
the hundreds of people watching the faces of the dead

(02:33:22):
and tearful silence. Right now, we've managed to lash together
a chain of rituals that keep them peaceful. How long
can that last? Naniyazzi glared at him, and then shifted
her gaze to Manny. She pointed a finger at Donald.
He thinks we should have let your people die. I
think we have a responsibility to intervene. I'm not saying

(02:33:43):
we don't, Donald Ferris insisted, I'm just saying I've seen
how this story ends. History may not repeat itself, but
it does rhyme pithy, Nanayazzi said, But oh. She stopped
mid sentence and stared out into the screens. Manny looked back,
just in time to watch the flow of dead faces

(02:34:03):
speed up again. The screens jerked and shuddered to accommodate
the new flow. Once they adjusted, Manny was shocked again
at the violence on display. He saw men run through
with lances, gutted by scimitars, burnt by napalm, and trampled
under the spiked hoves of quadrufracts. Oh God, he moaned.
Ah yes, Naniyazi sighed, that would be the cavalry. It

(02:34:25):
won't be much longer now they're here to finish the job. Rowland,
the knights of Rolling Fuck were a sight to see. Truly.
It wasn't often that Roland came across something that registered
as completely new to the deep, battered banks of his memory.
But there was no deja vous here, no sense that

(02:34:46):
he'd watched anything like it before. Rolling Fox writers worked
in two and three person squads, mostly using a mix
of hand grenades, small arms, flame throwers, and melee weapons
for shock value. Their timing was exquisite. One hundred riders
hit the martyrs at the same time. They didn't seem
to have specific targets or goals beyond causing mayhem, but

(02:35:07):
they did this expertly, spiking armored vehicles and field guns
with white phosphorus charges and scattering any clusters of martyrs
they could find. The woman Kashore rode past him, her
face skinned and weeping blood as she lobbed a hand
grenade towards a group of martyrs hunkered behind the shattered
remains of a public restroom. She pulled a maquah wheedle

(02:35:28):
with an iron trunk and gleaming obsidian blades free from
her belt. As her steed leapt over the burning wreckage
of a jeep and bounded towards the survivors. Roland followed her,
tearing a piece of rebar free from some rebble as
he charged. The restrooms were at one end of what
had once been a giant playground in a public park.
It had been derelict for more than a decade, but

(02:35:48):
the corpses of swing sets and remnants of slides were
still visible. Several hundred of the martyrs had fallen back
to this position, trying to create some sort of defensive line.
Panic and mass death robbed them of a lot of cohesion,
but they still managed to pour a lot of fire
into Roland and Cashori as they charged. A rocket propelled
grenade hit the chest of her quadrifract and burst, ripping

(02:36:11):
off one of the machine's legs and sending the Chrome
woman tumbling to the ground, gravel and rubble embedding itself
into the red musculature of her bleeding face. Roland didn't
stop for her. He charged ahead, absorbed a few dozen
rounds of small arms fire, and dodged a handful of
rocket propelled grenades. He hit a group of twenty three
men clustered behind a long, still glass barricade and several

(02:36:32):
heavy metal crates. These martyrs had been trying to get
a trio of anti tank guns back into the fight.
They gave up on that once Roland had closed to
about twenty feet. One of them, an older man with
a spine, shouted words of encouragement and charged forward, firing
with a dozen of his men. These soldiers weren't wearing
powered armor. They weren't good enough to hit more than

(02:36:53):
one and twenty shots. They wore old, up cycled body armor.
Only a few of them had bayonets. They present into
no real threat. Twenty seconds and I can put every
one of these fuckers down for the rest of the fight.
No one needs to die. His hand twitched, the river
of dopamine, and his synapses shrank to a babbling brook.
Roland felt a craving rise, maybe just a few more

(02:37:17):
he was among them. Roland found that brave old fucker
picked him up by the skull and used him as
a flail until the bones of his face came loose
and Roland's hands. He deployed the razor in his wrist
and started slicing off hands and ears. He moved on
to slashing tendons and muscles, and eventually just hacked at
his enemies like a drunken butcher. One boy dropped his gun,

(02:37:38):
tried to back away, and fell on his ass as
Roland stalked towards him, The protesters screamed and screamed. They
swung sticks and tried to bash him with their shields,
and he knocked their clumsy strikes aside and waded into
the mass. Roland didn't even consider drawing a gun. He
tore every fistful of human flesh, sent a wave of
orgiastically bubbling through his brain. A young woman screamed and

(02:37:59):
tried to run, and he grabbed her hair and pulled
in the sound of her neck snapping almost made in
shriek with joy. Please, said a different man, before Roland
shattered his skull against the pavement and left up to
chase down a trio of fleeing martyrs. He was back
and in serlick, bloody and injured, an almost snowblind from
the battle drugs, Roland shoved his way through the door
and into the air raid shelter. He'd already pulled a

(02:38:21):
grenade free from his harness when he found himself face
to face with a room full of women and children,
old men and young boys, civilians, unarmed and with sudden shock,
Roland realized he didn't care about that last part. His
synapses screamed for more. Roland obliged them, My god, stop stop.
He came back to himself and realized he was on

(02:38:43):
the ground and locked into a pretty darn good half Nelson.
It took him a moment to realize that woman Kaushore
was the one holding him. Oh, he said, what the fuck? Man?
Roland looked around. None of the martyrs near him were
still standing. It was hard even for his hindbrain to
identify how many people had fallen around him. He guessed

(02:39:04):
south of a hundred, but not far south. The number
was shocking. It implied a longer blackout than any of
the others. What was scarier was the sheer violence evident
in these men's death. Most of them were in more
than two pieces. Are you going to flip out? If
I let go? Roland shook his head and CASHOREI released him.
He turned around, still seated, and looked at the young woman.

(02:39:26):
She was filthy with grime and blood, some of it
her own. Her skinless face wept red, but even so
he could still see the judgment in her eyes. That
was not fucking necessary. She said, I'm sorry, I Roland.
It was skufucker. Mike Topaz trailed behind him at a
sizeable distance, sweeping the field with a rifle. Roland tried

(02:39:49):
to catch his eye. He avoided Roland's gaze for a
second or two, but then they connected and she stared
at him with those big, brown, tear stained eyes. This
isn't what I wanted, Rowland, This isn't what we said
we were fighting for. This is just butchery. He felt
angry at her blind rage that warred with his love.
Of course, it's butchery, he screamed. The world is built

(02:40:10):
by butcher's dude, Kashore. He slapped him hard, and Roland
came back to himself. Skollfucker Mike was closer now. Roland
looked for Topaz and found him. He was closer too,
and looked worried, but he didn't say anything. Is Roland
all right? Mike asked Kashouri. Was he hit? Sure? But
that's not the problem, Kashore, he said, he just went

(02:40:31):
bug funk on like a company of those guys, ripped
them apart with his bare hands. It's a fucking relapse,
said skullfucker Mike. He knelt down in front of Roland
and put a hand on his shoulder. Buddy, he said,
it's done. They're starting to run whole army. You'll be
routed in a few minutes. You just sit here and
catch your breath and routed. Roland looked around and realized

(02:40:55):
his hands were shaking. He felt a vast, throbbing emptiness
in his sinnapp this, he realized that the emptiness was
always there, and had been for as long as he
could remember. Most days, he hid it under a haze
of narcotics, but now that he'd had it filled for
just a minute, its emptiness hurt like an amputated limb.
He looked out and saw that, yes, skullfucker Mike was correct.

(02:41:19):
Several pockets of Martyr still held out, but the bulk
of the vanguard was either dead or fleeing for the
line of transports and technicals that stretched back to the Brazos.
It felt like the rest of the army had started
the slow process of halting and reversing its advance. The
Kingdom had decided to pull back. Are you done or not,
Roland asked an evil voice in the back of his head.

(02:41:41):
If you're not done, if you want more, you'd better
go get it. Roland leaned back. He looked from skullfucker
Mike took a shore and finally to Topaz. Then he
reached behind him, grabbed a busted rifle he could use
as a club, and stood up Rowland. No, skulfucker, Mike
started to say. Roland didn't hear the rest. He bolted

(02:42:03):
off as fast as he could run in the direction
of the fleeing martyrs. Sasha it was amazing how much
she could tell about the course of the battle just
from watching the faces of its casualties. The pace of
the killing had escalated to a certain level and then
started to slowly fall. More and more of the men
died with their backs to the enemy running. Sasha guessed

(02:42:26):
that meant the army or at least a lot of
it had started to break. The pace of death slowed
to a trickle. Well, then Donald Ferris grumbled, it seems
like that's more or less settled. I'm going to get
us another round. I think we've all eaten enough, guild father.
He stopped, his jaw dropped. Oh no. Sasha turned back

(02:42:46):
to the screen to see that the roll of the
dead had started to increase again. These men were running too,
but most of them weren't dying to arranged weaponry. They
were being grabbed from behind, ripped apart, or club to
death by something moving far too fast for humanized to
focus on. Roland Manny said in a dull voice filled
with sorrow. Sasha scanned the faces of her table mates.

(02:43:09):
Manny looked almost overwhelmed with guilt. His eyes were watery,
and he just kept shaking his head and muttering to himself.
Nanni Yazzi's mouth was closed, her face looked tight and
frozen in horror. Donald Ferris was quite clearly furious. His
face was so red. Sasha worried his heart might give out,
and yet she felt nothing. That's curious, isn't it. Sasha

(02:43:31):
could remember how angry she'd gotten as a girl when
she read some story about anti Christian brutality and Turkey
or Illinois. She remembered being horrified by the executions she
had witnessed, but she could only picture her emotional state
and those moments from a great distance, as if she
were staring at it through the fogged up lens of
a telescope. Why am I not angry? Why am I

(02:43:53):
not horrified? Her concern over this fact actually generated a
stronger emotional reaction than anything happening out on that battlefield.
Sasha stared out at the cameras and the continuing parade
of violence. She heard Manny cursing under his breath. She
heard Nana Yazi fight back a sob, but Sasha felt nothing,
save perhaps a bit of jealousy. Rowland, the scene out

(02:44:18):
by the Brasos felt less like a battlefield and more
like a playground. This might be the highest I've ever been,
he thought, as he broke a man's neck with the
back of his hand. Bullets whizzed by as a few
of the Braver soldiers tried to cover the retreat of
their comrades. Most of them, even the drivers, had abandoned
their transports. Hundreds of men were already wading into the river,

(02:44:39):
tearing off their armor and tossing aside their weapons as
they plunged in. The Heavenly Kingdom's army would not rally
any time soon. A martyr turned and drew his knife
in a feeble attempt at resistance. Roland caved in the
man's stern hum with a fist and squashed his heart
like a june bug. Ten meters ahead, he saw three
soldiers preparing to make their stand behind, and overt earned

(02:45:00):
a flatbed truck. As he ran, Roland grabbed at his
garded rifle off the ground, a Thompson submachine gun. He
realized it didn't feel like a reproduction either. Roland brought
the gun up to his shoulder. The Thompson gun bucked
in his hand. Roland laughed as he danced through the
Charnel house that had once been a forward operating bass.
Most of the National guardsmen were dead, but his nose

(02:45:21):
told him one of them was still in the game.
Roland turned past a hesco and saw the young man
propped half up against a pile of sandbags. The boy
held a hand to a bleeding hole in his gut.
His black face was bloodless, pale, and young, so young.
Roland didn't know if he'd ever seen a soldier who
looked that young. There was something familiar about the boy's face, Rowland,

(02:45:43):
the kid said, and recognition dawned in Roland's eyes, and
then he was back. He was about fifty yards further
ahead than he'd been before he blacked out. The Thompson
gun was still in his hand, pointed at a man
twelve yards to his left who was scrambling to get
a wire guided rocket launcher into a ring position. Roland
put a bullet through his brain. He turned past the

(02:46:04):
burning wreckage of a semi truck. A dozen bullets impacted
his chest inside. Then three martyrs charged him. Their bayonets fixed.
The hit wasn't bad, nothing but a flesh wound schofucker.
Mike looked worse. He lost most of his left arm.
Topaz had taken three rounds to the dome, but she
was still firing her dragon off. Roland's mind stretched into
the city of Dallas around them. There were a lot

(02:46:25):
of men coming their way, but those men were mostly
police swat officers, nothing substantial, no one who could stop
them from getting this bomb. Where it needed to go.
Roland screamed as he broke his Thompson gun over the
head of another martyr. Then he reeled back and dropped
the gun. That last memory had felt different, like it
unlocked something. Roland shook his head. The last martyr in

(02:46:47):
front of him broken ran. Roland didn't even think to
chase him. His head hurt in a way he couldn't
remember it ever hurting before. What the hell is going on?
It had all started the second he'd thought about the bomb.
As small as nukes go, just about one megaton. It
matches the ones that fought Leonarwood. The Guardian already released
the hacked documents showing the government considered bombing several of

(02:47:09):
the separatist camps. I think we can trust the American
people to put two and two together, Jim smiled. Roland
did not. This was his plan, but he didn't like it.
He knew, though, that it was the only way forward
for the revolution. There has to be another way, said
skullfucker Mike. This feels wrong, really really wrong. The floodgates

(02:47:30):
of Roland's mind opened, and a tidal wave of memory
swept him away. He dropped to his knees, the martyrs
around him continued to flee, too shocked and awed to
take advantage of his vulnerability. The battle drugs were gone now,
or at least he couldn't feel them anymore. Hundreds of
memories assaulted his consciousness thousands. For the first time in years,

(02:47:51):
Roland knew who he'd been, who he was again. I'm back,
Roland stood. He took one halting step forward, and then another,
and then he leaned against the frame of a broken
ABC for a little while as he pictured his mother's
face and voice for the first time in years. He
wanted to sob, but there was no time. He knew

(02:48:13):
who he was now, and he knew what he was
bound to do if he stayed this way. Roland's conscience
wouldn't allow that, so he trudged forward until he found
the right tool, a handheld grenade launcher clutched in the
dead hands of a martyr. He took the weapon and
sat cross legged and the blood soaked Texas dirt. Roland
looked up at the sky one last time and allowed

(02:48:35):
himself a long moment to remember his parents and his
brother in the day he and Topaz had first met,
and then he closed his eyes and pulled the trigger. Manny,
Nanny Yazi, Sasha, Donald Ferris, and Manny had all rushed

(02:48:56):
to a transport as soon as Roland's face showed up
on the screen. It seems the drones either didn't know
or didn't care enough to separate dead friends from dead foes.
Maybe that was the point Nanayazi drove. It took about
six minutes for the shiny green jeep to make its
way over the broken roads and towards the side of
the battle. No one spoke they reached the battlefield. There

(02:49:18):
are so many dead people. Manny had seen a lot
of carnage in his life, but nothing like this. The
stinches of burning flesh, opened bowls, and burning fuel were
so overwhelming they almost knocked him down. Donald Ferris and
Nana Yazzi looked just as queasy. Only Sasha whethered the
sights and smells with calm. She stayed focused enough to
spot skullfuckor Mike and the mess and direct Nana Yazzi

(02:49:40):
his way. Rolling Fox soldiers were out in force. They
stalked through the killing fields in groups of four or five,
searching for survivors or just looking for loot. Mike stood
with Topaz and Cashore, and a couple of chrombed Manny
didn't recognize. Most of them were seated by a handful
of large metal crates in the center of what had
once been a large playground. Oh God, the dead men

(02:50:03):
here had been torn apart. There was so much blood,
more than Manny had ever seen. It sluiced around on
the concrete like some sort of macab kittie pool. The
jeep came to a wet stop in front of the group.
The act of breakings into spray of gore out across
skullfucker Mike's legs. Hey, he said, what are you all
doing here? Rowland? Manny said, what happened to Rowland? Mike

(02:50:27):
looked confused. Topaz raised his head up to look out
at them. Many was surprised to see tears rolling down
his face. His lip trembled a bit, but when he
spoke there was steel and fury in his voice. He
decided to keep killing. I'm sure he's still killing now. No,
Manny said, he's dead, or that's what the drone said.
We have to find him. Get out of that seat,

(02:50:50):
Mike said to Nanny Izzie, I'm driving in an instant.
Topaz his tears stopped, and before Manny could say anything,
Topaz hopped into the back seat of the jeep. Fast.
Topaz told skullfucker Mike as he took over from Nana Yazzi,
go very fast. It didn't take long to find him.
Roland's route through the army was painted in red. Hundreds

(02:51:11):
of dead men, maybe more than a thousand, made a
clear path with their corpses. That path didn't end until
they were almost at the brazos and they saw where
Roland had fallen. Roland's armored body was splayed out limp
next to the carcass of an old semi truck. There
were two very dead men directly in front of him,
but neither of them looked to have done him in.

(02:51:32):
Roland hadn't gone down to enemy fire. He jammed a
very large gun in his mouth and blown the top
off of his head. To all signs and to all logic,
he looked dead. Donald Ferris shook his head and muttered something.
Sasha just stared. Nana Yazzi put her hand on Manny's shoulder.
He was she started to say, but she was interrupted

(02:51:54):
by Roland as he lifted his ruined head up to
look at them. His eyes were still in foe. Blood
drooled down his nose, out of his mouth, and down
from the gaping exit wound in his forehead. He spat
out several teeth. Many saw daylight through his skull, but
still Roland was able to speak. How the funk are
you people? He asked, m M. This is Roxanne Gay,

(02:53:51):
the host of The Roxanne Gay Agenda, the bad feminist
podcast of your Dreams. Each week I talked to an
interesting person about feminism, race, writing in books, and art, food,
have culture, and yes, politics, we can't escape politics. Listen
to the luminary original podcast, The Roxanne Gay Agenda every

(02:54:12):
Tuesday on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you get your podcasts. Hey lead the listeners. Tig here.
Last season on Lethal Lit, you might remember, I came
to Hollow Falls on a mission clearing my aunt best
name and making sure justice was finally served. But I

(02:54:34):
hadn't counted on a rash of new murders tearing apart
the town. My mission put myself and my friends in danger.
Though it wasn't all bad, I'm going to be a
reality tig. I like you, but now all signs point
to a new serial killer in Hollow Falls. If this
game is just starting, you better believe I'm gonna win.

(02:54:58):
I'm tig Torres. This is Lethal Lit. Catch up on
season one of the hit murder mystery podcast Lethal Lit
A take Tara's mystery out now, and then tune in
for all new thrills in season two, dropping weekly starting
February nine. Subscribe now to never miss an episode. Listen
to Leave the Lit on the I Heart Radio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The art

(02:55:22):
world it is essentially a money laundering business. The best
fakes are still hanging on people's walls. You know they
don't even know or suspect that their fakes. I'm at
like Baldwin and this is a podcast about deception, greed,
and forgery in the art world. I just walked in
and saw this great red painting presuming to be a rothco.

(02:55:46):
Of course, art forgeries only happen because there's money to
be made, a lot of money. I'm listening to how
what they're paying for the thing. It was an incredible
mansome money. You knew the painting was fake. Um Listen
to Art Fraud starting February one on the I Heart

(02:56:07):
Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts,
M

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}After the Revolution: Chapters Twenty One, Twenty Two, and Twenty Three