March 1, 2023 • 53 mins
If you're a fan of weird internet culture you've probably heard of the SCP foundation, a mysterious compendium of top-secret (totally real) trans-dimensional paranormal phenomena! So I'm going to go through some real life documented animals who could easily be SCP entries.
Guests: Robert Brockway & Seanbaby
Footnotes: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZXDxLMqpCBvdndCJUvDf3El5wZylsjyBtkyt97j3SnY/edit?usp=sharing
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Welcome to Creature feature production of iHeartRadio. I'm your host
of Many Parasites, Katie Golden. I studied psychology and evolutionary biology,
and today on the show we are securing, protecting, and
containing some mysterious cryptids that are very much real. If
you're a fan of weird internet culture, you've probably heard
of the SCP Foundation, a mysterious compendium of top secret,
(00:31):
totally real, transdimensional paranormal phenomena. It's said that the SCP
Foundation is an example of collaborative writing fiction and sure
it's fictional. That's totally not something a super top secret
organization would say. So I'm going to go through some
real life documented animals who could easily be SCP entries.
(00:53):
From the Grim Reaper who floats in the midnight Zone,
to a pile of undead spiders. These creatures have all
been found to data expunged. Discover this and more as
we answer the agele question Eric Data redacted. Joining me
today our hosts of the one nine hundred hot dog
podcast dog Zone nine thousand, Robert Brockway and Shan Maybe
(01:19):
perfect pronunciation perfect, nobody ever does the extra gees and
Z's thank you Yeah there's two gs, two z's. I'm
Sean Baby, I studied volleyball and bud light Nice, I'm
Robert Brockway, and thank you for containing and hopefully protecting me. Yeah,
and securing, don't forget securing. Well, that's impossible. So the
(01:42):
inspiration for this episode actually came from a young listener
named Max who asked me to do an episode about
animals that could be the subject of the SEP Foundation.
It is this quote unquote fictional website where they have
Wikipedia entries that are meant to look like they come
(02:03):
from this shadowy governmental organization, where they describe the things
that they secure contain, protect transdimensional creepy paintings, animals that
are half an animal, creepy things that follow you around,
and a candy bowl. I think that's haunted anyways. So
(02:27):
I when you say young, how are we talking like
thirty five young or like thirty five years young? I think,
what did they say? I think they're around eight years old, okay,
and they're Yeah, they're loose on the Internet. It's just
free to roam, free to roam. SCP. Be careful out there.
It's a while on waking Internet. But yeah, the SEP foundation.
(02:49):
It's I think it kind of there's a bunch of
media to like video games and creative videos. I think
like it's in the same genre as like the slender
Man stuff, where it's like this spooky Internet stuff that
is made to seem like found footage or something that
(03:11):
someone caught in real life. My daughter loves this kind
of stuff as soon if there's some sort of a
meta narrative going on of like a cartoon getting corrupted
by darkness, that's like that's her thing. Yeah, I go
down the rabbit hole of user generated content for that
stuff all day. Yeah, it's fun. I do like Haunted SpongeBob,
(03:31):
where it's like, oh, it's an episode of SpongeBob, but
it's haunted. M Oh yeah, I'm so out of touch
with the kids these days that that that just confounds
and baffles me. Haunted SpongeBob, I don't even have a
picture of what that might be the idea a lot
of them. Actually, it helps that SpongeBob has those like
(03:54):
watercolor paintings that they do sometimes where it's like super
realistic close up of squid words face and you can
see all the pores. It's already I think verging on
nightmare Fuel that show and speaking of nightmare Fuel, under
the Sea, the first entry in our sep Secure Creature podcast,
(04:16):
Yeah you did there? Yeah, uh is found in the
midnight zone, quite literally, the midnight zone in the ocean.
What do you guys think of when you think of
the midnight zone? Probably reading ocean books with my daughter,
(04:37):
it comes up a lot. It's one of her favorites.
She loves these, uh these types of creatures. I guess
this is all my point of reference. This is fantastic.
I do not have a creepy daughter, so uh I
wish I did. But uh I, I could have a
(05:00):
creepy I could have several creepy daughters if I wanted to.
That'd be really good at that. Maybe I got Maybe
I got a new life goal. It's just to start
a little, a little weird creepy family. He just bother
about this diggy and depths. I think of like a
knockoff twilight Zone, like a twilight Zone that's on like
the Sci Fi Channel in two thousand and three and
(05:23):
ran for most of a season. Yeah, welcome midnight Zone,
Kevin Bacon. You think Carmen Elector in two thousand and three.
Kevin Smith. Ah, yeah, I feel that really good. What
if it was the real Jersey the best Guy, but
(05:43):
instead of being made out of people, we was made
out of pizza. Huh what a Kevin Smith impression? My god,
dat What would you do if you were really deep
in the ocean and all the fish were dark, but
with a little light bulb on their heads? Hi, I'm
telling me. Farland The Midnight Zone spooky Music, seven or
(06:10):
seven entire episodes. Here's what kids love. Todd McFarland's Spawn references. Yeah,
now that show is a big hit. Haunted, Haunted Spawn.
The kids love Haunted Spawn, well, the biggest name on
the Internet. The Midnight Zone is a very real place
in the ocean, found around a thousand to four thousand
(06:31):
meters or three thousand, three hundred to thirteen thousand feet
under the sea. And that's a lot of feet. It's
so many feet. It is also known as the bathy
Pleagic Zone. It is an area of the ocean so
deep that no sunlight can penetrate it. No photosynthesis or
(06:55):
sun tanning can occur here. It is pitch black, well
and wet, and it's real. It's somehow, it's wetter than
the normal ocean down there, Like, it's weird how that happens.
It's James Cameron keeps an office down there. It's just
to get away. It's a serious wetness down there. And
(07:16):
in these depths there lurks something called the stigio Medusa gigantea,
whose name means giant medusa with the darkness like the
river of death. So the most god animal, yes, so
(07:36):
god that when he introduces himself, he's just like, okay
that let looped back around from scary to like I'm
gonna bully you a little bit now. Yeah. Yeah. Their
scientists are like, maybe you should have been a magician.
I don't can we went a little crazy, buddy. I
do like the idea of here's what I named the
jellyfish that dark Yeah, I named mine Todd after myself
(08:02):
and Todd McFarlane. You're just going off the deep end. Oh,
I'm going to throw you in the river sticks aka
the turilet. You're getting us whirly, the most bully jellyfish science. Yes,
so this is also known as the phantom jellyfish. There's
(08:23):
no name this jellyfish has that doesn't sound super dramatic.
And over the top. But if you see it, it
does look super dramatic and over the top. Yeah, let
me try to describe this. This looks like, um like
a little like a little hat or maybe kind of
a UFO with dryer lint tentacles of dryer land. I
like that. The try hard goth jellyfish is wearing a
(08:46):
little fedora. Yeah, that's very appropriate, and a trench coats.
A fedora with a trench coat coming out of it.
This is very like mid two thousands try hard high
school sad boy kind of. Yeah. This is someone else
first his first day of Fedora. See him they can
pull it off him? Yeah, like and everyone says no,
(09:09):
it's kind of like the It's like the vampire cost
players of the mid two thousands. Excuse me, cos players.
It's a it's a way of life. I knew. I
was friends with some of those kids. Well they're phantom
jellyfish now. So the giant Phantom jellyfish has very shy,
(09:30):
much like a mid two thousands vampire lifestyle player. They
have only been sided around one hundred times, which sounds
like a lot, but for an animal, you know, I
guess that's not a lot. That's not a lot for
a whole species. I mean, if it was like one,
it was like one like like Benson, the Haunt of
(09:51):
Jellyfish and you've seen him one hundred times. Tired about
seeing you, Benson. Sorry. So it is thought to be
found all over the world in the depths of the
ocean's midnight zone. Uh. It can grow to be over
(10:12):
thirty feet or ten meters in length. So try given
that thing a swirlieu and it weighs over ninety pounds
or forty kilograms, making it one of the largest invertebrate
predators in the ocean. This thing is a full nightmare. Yeah, yeah,
it is. Again, it's got like that little like gelatinous
(10:35):
fedorac cap kind of looks like a bowler hat made
out of a gossamer veil, and then all its tentacles
are these like sort of they look like shredded grim
reaper robe just kind of floating around there. And because
they live in the midnight zone, that grim reaper like
(10:55):
appearance renders them invisible. In these photos we see like
they kind of you know, there's almost like this little
bit of like an orange glow inside of the bell
that fedora hat that bowler cap is called the bell
of the jellyfish, and that glow is not visible. Normally
(11:15):
that that glow happens because there's light being shined on
this thing, but typically it is completely invisible to any
of the poor inhabitants of the midnight Zone who are
small enough to be eaten by this thing. They will
silently drift in this dark watery abyss and grab small
(11:35):
fish or zooplankton with their veil like tentacles. And unlike
a lot of other jellyfish, they do not have stinging tentacles,
so they don't really stun their prey. They just ensnarl them,
tangle them up in their tentacles, smother them, and then
eat them. It's hardcore, Benson. Yeah, take it easy, Benson.
(11:57):
There's like probably no good way to die in the
midnight Zone. Like if you're being chumped to death by
a by a bowler hat, you're like, all right, it's
something like that. Yeah, Yeah, that's that's what to be
expected of the midnight Zone. I'm Kevin Smith. It's definitely
not the worst way to die. That will discuss on
this podcast today. Oh good, Yeah, that's the direction we're going,
(12:22):
all right, I hope you love it. Max to my
eight year old listener, here's a terrifying way to die
in the ocean. They requested it loves it. So though
they are a silent phantom death stalker of the depths,
their prey tends to be very small. Uh. These very
(12:44):
small fish sometimes zooplankton, which means that a larger, more
daring fish has an opportunity for what for a findship,
So they really only like to kill you if you scream.
That's the that's the phantom jellyfish one. So the Pelaso
Bathia pleagica aka pleagic brochila. Which usually when I have
(13:09):
like two names for something, one name is at least
recognizable or less goofy Uh, this one is just like
this one is either Theelaso Bathio pleagica or pleagic brothula brochila,
which other whichever you want. Brochilla. See, I thought that
was a joke name. I thought you're like, he's brochilla.
He is. He is actually bro chilla, which is funny.
(13:32):
He is a relatively ugly fish. Uh. It's this dark,
purply brown. It kind of looks like a an elongated
plum groove fish parts it's like shaped sort of like yeah,
it's with eyeballs in a fin. It's shaped like a
stubby eel. It grows around nine inches or a little
(13:55):
over twenty two centimeters long. I'm just gonna say it
for the record. God should be a shame to himself.
This is where you never expected us to go to
the midnight zone. This is where he hides all of
the screw ups. Yeah, you shouldn't go down there. That's
the first draft folder. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, eh, well
we'll put these here in the ocean, and it's like,
don't you love us? Don't you love us? God? Oh yeah,
(14:20):
just go down there. But you can't see us down here.
All the better to treasure you with my heart's eyes. Oh, Benson,
you got a lot of character. So it looks like
the sidewalk after someone like lost an elbow to it,
Like it just looks like a human elbow smeared across. Yeah,
(14:42):
with a face with a face, yeah, like or you
pulled sort of like a giraffe tongue out in stead
a fish face on it. It's it's like a swimming infection,
for sure. I've got it. I've got this is a
golden eye face unwrapped from the polygons. Oh oh God,
that makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit.
(15:03):
So it is thought that the pleagic brochilla is indeed
a brochilla to the phantom jellyfish. It lives in the
jellyfish's bell, So that little bowler cap that makes it
look like a huge nerd uh, this little guy, this
fish swims in there and removes parasites. Meanwhile, the fish
(15:25):
gets a free meal and is provided shelter inside of
the jellyfish's bell. So they are he may be ugly,
but at least he eats bacteria out of a douchebags hat.
I live, I live in the grim Reaper's hat. It's
like this jellyfish is really trying to get a vibe going,
(15:46):
like I stop the night in the midnight zone and
me too. Okay, y, I'm gonna need you to get
back in my hat. Hello, you're about to meet You're
gonna eat that weird moon caterpillar. Yeah, he kind of,
he does. His vibes are definitely different from the jellyfish.
(16:08):
The jellyfish is more goth and this one is a
little bit more like Cronenberg's mistake. M hm. I would
watch this children's show though. Yeah, like you put those
two together. That's an odd couple I could get behind.
It's Benson and Jerry living in the midnight zone eating
little fish, going around looking like God's mistakes. Perfect theme
(16:33):
song for it too, we were We're already most of
the way there. Let's pitch it. Come get me, Netflix,
I'm here to write your new children's show. I'm already
writing the pitch dick. Yeah, doing some illustrations, but goth
in the scab. Just make sure all of the characters
look like donated organs that have grown bad faces already done.
(16:57):
They all look like inserts from SpongeBob. So spiders, how
you guys feel about spidies? Strongly against, mildly against? Oh
there we go, let them live if they're in a
(17:19):
corner or something. Yeah, you just do your thing. Wow, real,
real sort of benevolent god you are to the spiders.
I feel like I could be the kind of guy
that would put a spider outside, but that's just not
an option in my house. If I hear like a
random scream, I don't. I don't panic anymore. I'm just like, oh,
you found a spider. Yeah. I am the type of
(17:41):
person to gently pick up a little spider. I actually
hold it just by one of its little little arms
and go like, come with me, a little spidy. We're
going outside, and it just walks next to me and yeah,
and just like here you go go outside, you are.
I give a little kiss packed in a tiny brown
(18:02):
paper bag full of lunch. It's just flyguts. So there
is a Twitter thread by someone named Adam Roy documenting
the subreddit aptly named spiders Just spiders the subreddit which
is a great subreddit. I love it, and Adam Roy
(18:24):
found this great story on it. Someone from Australia posted
on the spiders subreddit for help because they kept finding
piles of dead spiders under the kitchen table. And they're
from Australia, so they're they're posting in Spiders about piles
and dead spiders and you're sitting there from Australia. I
(18:45):
wouldn't have guessed that in a million years. And they
need help. This has to be dire. I mean, their
whole life is spent just fending off and possibly accidentally
eating spiders. So if they're like, this is messed up,
you guys, I need somebody to come help me. And
then they say, by the way, I'm from Australia, You're like,
good God, No, yeah, I think in Australia they don't
(19:07):
always accidentally eat spiders. So yeah, I was trying to
be generous. I wasn't trying to offend your Australian listeners.
But yeah, you're a bunch of spider eating freaks. I
know that. Yeah, I mean I think spiders are nutritious
and delicious. If I wasn't such good friends with him,
I'd eat a spider. Why not. The true horror behind
(19:27):
this podcast, ladies and chill, Like, what I'm saying is
it chickens only got two legs and spiders got eight
of them more more more makes a whole family of
eight happily. Anyways, I'm graduated from taking them out hand
to hand in hand. Yeah, I'm gonna eat. I don't
eat spiders. I knit them tiny sweaters. So Katie eat spiders.
(19:48):
Have you ever seen a human mouth filled the spiders? Time?
Kevin Smith and here in the Midnight Zone, what if
our teeth was spiders? Makes you think, doesn't it. That's
that's one, right, that's one. Let's do that one gain. Yeah, oh,
this is still the intro. We only got seven episodes,
just put it in here. Martha was a regular lady,
(20:08):
but then she wished her teeth was spiders. Turns out
she didn't like it. It was a bad idea pile
of dead spiders Australia. But what was weird about it
was that these are all sorts of different species of spiders.
If it's like a pile of the same type of spider,
(20:29):
You're like, ah, got a pile of spiders, okay, But
it was a pile of assorted spiders, like a like
a mixed assortment of spiders. Yeah, Like they got together
and chose to die together. It's very strange. You're like,
what led to that decision? Spiders? Spider call if you
took a scoop of spider pot pourri. M yeah, that's
(20:50):
a really good way to describe this. It's a good
way to liven up a bathroom. But upon closer investigation,
it turns out the spider's legs were splayed open. And
you know how like when you see a dead spider,
as I do all the time, and I cry about it,
the legs are curled inwards. It's the classic. It's the
classic dead spider. Look. Well, the reason that dead spiders
(21:13):
have curled legs is that their legs are actually powered
by hydraulic fluid, not by muscles. So they pump this
like spider fluid through their legs, and the pumping of
this fluid is actually what makes their legs move around.
This skinness sound crazy, kat I think you had us
on the show when we talked about necrotic like hydraulic
(21:33):
spider leg pumping. That's very possible, I did. Yeah, we
talk about spider juice a lot. Yeah, this podcast should
just be called the Spider Juice Podcasts. Spider Juice with
Katie in the Dough sponsored by Spider Juice. It's real
(21:54):
spiders now juggy version through anything, Martha. So when spiders die,
as you may remember from previous shows where I have
explained this, the fluid pump system stops working and their
legs relax, which actually means that they curl up, because
(22:14):
curled up is kind of like the default position when
this fluid is not being pumped through their legs. It's
kind of like it's kind of like a party horn
when air is running through it, it's extended. But when
the airflow stops, it curls up. But just replace party
horn with spider legs and air with spider juice, and
there you go. You got a spider leg. You got
(22:34):
a party spider horn. That's how you got a party spider.
And just imagine someone like blowing into a spider and
all the legs like going, here's what I'm picturing. You're
lost in a desert island and you're there with like
all the plane crash survivors, and one of them is
a child. They're like, it's my birthday, but I don't
have any party horns. And you like pull up a
big spider that you found on the island. You're like,
(22:55):
that's all right, I know how to do this. Katie's
podcast you can tear off an here's the podcast I
read just for you eight years old, Max. So, uh,
what uh? The significance of the fact that these spiders
were found with their legs splayed open rather than curled up,
(23:18):
meant that the spiders weren't dead, They're just paralyzed. So
what do you boys think a pile of paralyzed spiders
were doing under a kitchen table and go I'm gonna say, uh,
I know Max is listening, but I'm gonna say hardcore drugs.
I was gonna say snuggling. Let's go in different directions,
(23:40):
cattle party. Uh No, hardcore drugs is actually closer to it.
This was the handiwork of a mud Dauber wasp, which
the Australian who found this pile of spiders actually did
confirm because they saw this wasp crawling out of the
(24:00):
table leg, which is a weird place to put a wasp.
But you keep your wasp. I keep my wasps well
organized in the wasp shelf, all right. So mud Daubers
are very waspy wasps. I mean, they're definite wasps shaped wasp.
They are yellow and black, usually sometimes they're more brown. Um.
(24:25):
They're different species, many different species, and they generally have
these very thin tube like waists. Yeah I got those
barbering proportions. Yeah ready, Yeah, the just in an Instagram
filter that makes you look like this wasp. I think
(24:49):
this wasp has had some work done, no doubt. That
is definitely a thorax implant. Yeah. The mud Daubers species
are found all over the world, spreading torture and death
throughout the lamp happy birthday, little child Max mud daubers.
I don't know if it's his birthday, but I feel
like it's his birthday. Yeah, if you need a party blower, Max,
(25:13):
tear off a spider leg and put it in your mouth. Uh,
don't do that so your parents don't get mad at us.
So mud mud daubers are named as such because they
construct nests out of mud. Typically, these are like sort
of tubes. Some species have really elaborate nests that they
(25:34):
kind of look like pipe organs. Sometimes they look more lumpy,
but the general thing is that they construct a tube
and in each tube they will lay an egg. But
they want their egg to be well nourished so to
provide food for their babies. This is where the pile
(25:54):
of paralyzed spiders comes in. Niche the killed a wasp,
No no hesitation, just flattened right there. Yeah. No, I don't,
I don't hold. I don't like gently escort a wasp
out of my house. That is, I mean, I'm so scared,
got no respect, got no respect for a wasp. No
(26:15):
wasps scare me because they can sting you and it hurts.
And also they just they do a lot of messed
up stuff. They got some war crimes going on, Like,
you don't need to do this as a wasp. You
could just kill them and then keep them around. But
the paralyzing them and then just leaving them there, that's
a wasp move. There's technically a reason for this serial
(26:37):
killer like move, wasp apologist. Look, I may be just
a city lawyer here, but I say this wasp had
good reason to paralyze it's victims and leave it as
food for its young Um I did it for my kids. Yeah,
every evil person says that wasp. So the wasp herself
(27:00):
cannot eat the spider. She actually just daintily SIPs the
nectar of flowers. But she will paralyze these spiders and
then take them to her nest. So she will deposit
these dead spiders into one of her nest tubes, lay
an egg on top of them, seal it up with
(27:22):
another bit of mud, and just leave. It's probably whistling
to herself going off to sip some more nectar, like
she's a fairy princess. But yeah, she has a pile
of bodies in a tube and they're still alive. Yes,
where do you keep your bodies? And a shelf labeled
(27:42):
bodies next to the I am very organized. I really
marry condo my whole death celler. So both answers are
loose table leg for me or heat my wasps and
all my bodies. It's such a good delivery system. Here
is where the torture element comes into, Like it is
(28:03):
actually very important for her to leave these spiders alive,
just immobilized, because if they're dead spiders, they go bad
and they need to be fresh. So when the egg
hatches and starts to mature over the winter, the larva
can slowly eat the spiders while they are fresh and
juicy and delicious. I'm still not on board just invent
(28:26):
preservatives or paralyzed spider. I think there's a frog that
like is a fridge. Just like talk to that guy.
You're thinking of the wood frog, which can be frozen
and then come back to life. So you go, he's
half he's halfway to a fridge instead of thousands of
(28:48):
years of evolving into a monster. He does have an
frize in his blood. Yeah, that guy's got it going on. Yeah,
so even better. The mud Dauber wasps like to kill,
specifically some of the cutest spiders in my opinion, like
you know what I mean, it's messed up. You don't
have to do that. So they like to kill jumping spiders,
(29:11):
which they're my favorite spider. I love jumping spiders. They
only cute spiders. Really, they have adorable little faces. They're
like the puppies of the spider world. Often really colorful
and amazing. They also like to kill orb weavers, who
they're not. They don't have like the cute faces of
jumping spiders, but they can be really pretty. They can
come in beautiful colors kind of almost look like sort
(29:32):
of these like floral I don't know, they just they're
like the fairies of the spider world. They're they're they're beautiful.
But they kill those and they cram like a dozen
of them into the nest tube. All these spiders are paralyzed,
not dead. They lay their egg and then the egg
will hatch into a larva that will just comfortably eat
(29:53):
its way through these still alive spiders. Sez eat it.
Wasp Yeah, suck. And the thing is mud Daubers have
not only killed spiders, but airplanes full of people. Oh see,
I told you that I know a monster when I
spot one. Yeah, what how did the store they stored
(30:15):
the whole day airplanes full of people in the middle tubes?
What was Samuel Jackson during all of this? He was
way too focused on the snakes. Snakes aren't like snakes,
I think, are not. They're not as devious as wasps.
I'm gonna get these mother father wasps off this Monday
to Friday plane. So uh, Max, you might not want
(30:39):
to listen to this deck bit um. Anyways, In nineteen
ninety six, a seven fifty seven Virgin Air flight three
oh one crashed into the Atlantic while flying from the
Dominican Republic. Crash investigators pinned the blame on a black
and yellow mud dauber, who likely built a nest in
(31:03):
one of the important external flight instruments, messing up the
air speed readings. I mean, apparently it was also like
pilot air because the pilot really should have known better,
like plane crashes are so rare, or usually like a
bunch of things have to go wrong at the same time.
It has to be like this weird coincidence of like
(31:24):
the pilot's not doing a good job, but also there's
some problem with the instruments or you have a freaking
wasp build its nest inside one of the instruments and
nobody notices it. Apparently the plane was also not stored properly,
so it's a big problem. But yeah, the plane would
not have crashed if it wasn't for this wasp. It
(31:44):
was good news to me that, like they died in
the crash and weren't like individually paralyzed by wasps and
then had eggs hatch into their still living bodies. I
wouldn't say because they died in a crash, but I'm
saying like what I was picturing as you started the story. Yeah,
(32:04):
in twenty fifteen, there was a near crash and plane
damage with no fatalities on a Gulf Stream G five
because an outflow valve got blocked with mud dauber nest material,
so they tried to do it again. I've got to
become the Alex Jones of Lost Pint. Just you see, people,
(32:26):
it's everywhere. You're not paying attention. The wasps are in
the planes. I mean, mainstream media, you can look it up.
The wasps are trying to kill us. That's a really
good Alex Jones. I can, like I can hear the
blood fressels breaking in your eyeballs, which is a bit touch.
So I think that, like, the thing is humanity. You know,
(32:49):
we're all busy fighting each other when we should be
busy fighting the wasps. M let's get them. Yeah, like
we everybody listening to this go find a wasps nest
and fight it, right, Yes, but don't do that otherwise, Max,
don't don't do that, Max. Max's parents are gonna be
(33:12):
furious with me. After it's your birthday. You're exempted from
the wasp wars. Think of the lives who would save Max. So, Fellers,
I have a photo for you. It's a picture of
(33:32):
something lying in someone's blue gloved hand. Can you describe
it to me? It is sort of Lovecraft's fly fishing hook.
M agree to that? Yeah? I like that. It's like
(33:53):
it kind of looks like a piece of weird kelp. Right,
it's got sort of a kelpie kelpie look, and it's God.
It looks like another of God's mistakes. Let's just say, yeah,
I don't trust my holes around this thing. This thing
seems like something that does stuff to holes. YEA, yeah,
that is Actually your intuition about protecting your holes is
(34:16):
very very on point here. So what we were looking at.
Is god? It really? Okay? So where do I start?
Do I start with a weird broccoli looking stuff or
the bulb broccoli? Weird broccoli, maybe the probi tendril? Yeah, okay.
So there's imagine a bulb and it kind of looks
(34:39):
like a kelp bulb. But then there's like a stem
that comes off of it, and off of that stem
is like a hammerhead. Now let's go back to the bulb.
On the other end of the bulb, it looks like
a bunch of broccoli or weird cauliflower growing off of it.
And this is all sort of a brownish greenish color,
kind of like kelp uh. And then underneath the broccoli
(35:03):
stuff is a tail that's just like a tube. This
looks like a ship. Brockway would fly in Destiny Too.
That's a Destiny drip slam Maxill love that one. Yeah. Yeah,
accessible accessible, that's why you bring us on? Is this accessible?
Universal humor? Based on my esthetic choices in Destiny Too?
(35:28):
So big ups to marine biologist doctor Jimmy Burnout on Twitter,
who provided a studying picture of this thing. There is
surprisingly scant info on this, Like there are some papers
on it. But as far as I can tell, there's
not like a lot of popular info about it. There's
(35:49):
not like a ton of sort of easily readable information
on it. Uh. Yeah, you don't get into biology to
study this. Yeah, it's not. It's not a real popular
miss mash of biological atrocities. People just you know, it's
not really a trendsetter. Yeah it is. Uh. It is
a copa pod. So this is the giant copa pod
(36:13):
Cephreon levi atum. That doesn't sound like I said it right,
but sippypop, Yeah, it legatum, tie burrow, wind to your colon.
(36:38):
It's a copa pod. It's found in the South Atlantic Ocean. U.
The giant copa pod is actually a crustacean, which is weird. Uh,
And it's weird. It's related to other copa pods, So
copa pods. There's a big group of stuff of these
little crustaceans called copa pods, and copa pods tint to
(37:00):
be very small. Often they're like they can be like
planktonically small. But the giant copa pod is an exception.
It fits comfortably in the palm of your hand or
uncomfortably embedded inside of you if you're a fish. I
knew that was coming this jee you can just spot
(37:20):
a whole dweller mile away. Yeah, so we're going to
talk about the cusk eel. You guys want to talk
about the cusk eel cuskeel cusk eel, I'm in so.
Uh the cuskeel is a family of eel like bony fish.
They uh, there are various species of cusk eel. One
(37:47):
is called the king clip. I think there's like a
pink cusk eel. Um. You know they're it's a fish
and they are unfortunate to be the targets of the
giant copa pod who likes to burrow themselves into the
cusk eel's chin. Yeah, and so their chin. I wasn't
(38:11):
expecting that the devil's goatee got a little broccoli soul patch.
Everyone's making funnier like I didn't choose it. Yeah, part
which part dangles out of the eel, the the broccoli part,
the hammer head part is embedded inside of the cuskeel. Okay, Yeah,
(38:33):
So they bury that hammer head portion of their body,
uh like under the cuskel's mouth into the flesh and
they have a tiny mouth on that hammerhead portion and
then suck the juices. Oh, I thought they were going
to take like little tiny bites of everything it eats,
like just taking a fry off of their plate every time. Yeah,
(38:57):
I'll take one of those. Just imagining this thing like
flopping around, like trying to get the fry into some
ketchup and be like you. I maybe all that. I
may be a shame on the eyes of the creator,
but I do like ketchup on my fries. Say that
you're my best friend, copa pot You'll never kill me.
(39:20):
I'd like, just give me the large fry because my
soul patch, I know, my soul patch is gonna have
a few it says. It's not now it sucks juices
out of the fish as far as I can tell, honestly.
I mean, look, if you are a giant copa pod
expert out there and I got something wrong, please let
me know. I want to talk to you, because I
(39:41):
have been able to find very little information about this thing.
I would very much not like to talk to a
giant Coupa pod expert. You've made a lot of bad choices,
Giant couple pod expert. I'm gonna end up on someone
else's body shelf. Yeah, you're something that something's going to
burrow into you. They'll have something that will burrow into you.
You're not and out of that conversation without a second
(40:02):
being yet. I think I probably on probably on purpose,
but he might just have a couple of him that
he'd forgotten his pockets. Yeah, are going to get left behind.
I mean, I've priority got a few buddies living inside me,
so you know more than merrill. Well, I mean, if
you want to rock a soul patch, it's fine. So yeah,
(40:23):
they you know, basically attached themselves under the chin. And
I bet you're wondering what that broccoli looking thing is. God,
that's sex organs it is. I have no idea what
it is. Apparently no one else does either. So yeah,
(40:49):
it's the beneficiary soulbit. It's like every every one of
these relationships is give take, there has to be a benefit,
and it's the soul patch. Like you can't if you're
a fish, you cannot grow the soul patch short of this.
So yeah, if you want one, and you really do
want one, yeah, there's a price. Yeah, there you go.
It's a usually beneficial symbiosis. I think it's what you
(41:11):
call that in the Midnight Zone. I guess, I mean
you would call it that. I guess if soul patches
were something that the Kuski all wanted. Kevin Smith, you
like my soul patch, doesn't like you, welcome to the
Midnight Zone. What if everyone's soul patches had a soul Wow?
(41:34):
That might be Okay, that's definitely one. That's episode seven.
We're going out on that. So now, I do you
want to talk to the jant cob Bought experts. You
guys couldn't figure out the broccoli. I mean maybe someone has.
I could like, it could got four chunks on it.
You can't figure out twenty five of the chunks. It
could be something that someone's figured out but I couldn't find.
(41:57):
So if you know what the pod broccoli is all about,
let me know. I would guess that what you searched
for broccoli? What is PCO broccoli? Um? I would guess
it's something to do with gosh, probably gas exchange or
aeration of some kind, just because I'm thinking it's a
(42:18):
weird surface area. Stuff like this, like branching. Weirdness of
the surface area makes me think something to do with
aeration or change. Yeah, it's probably how it goes up
and down. Maybe yeah, maybe maybe how it's like has
helps with its respiration or helps aerate its eggs. I
(42:38):
don't know. Maybe it's broccoli. It's just broccoli getting their
house for my lunch. It could just be a real,
a real sloppy as a species up. I would love that.
(43:02):
I would love that the person who preserved the specimen
dropped a piece of broccoli from their stir fry into
the jar. It's like, well, well, yeah, yeah, I'm the
only one who took this course. And now they just
they're stuck in a lie because the thing is so
rare that they're just like, nah, yeah, no, that's part
of it. That's part of the creature. Yeah, what does
(43:23):
it do? We don't science. Science doesn't know. Well, you
found one without broccoli. That's a totally new kind. I
wonder if anyone's ever tasted it. Without question, the freak
who majored in copa pot Yeah, that's what biologists used
to do. They used to taste the animals they would study,
Like Darwin definitely ate a turtle from the Gallapagos, a tortoise, sorry,
(43:48):
probably heat and I wanted or two too. You know,
they ain't got him every single kind of finch, all
those barnacles. He was obsessed with barnacles. The finches start
of all ving beaks to peck at Darwin because it's like,
Ohwin measures. This is a very interesting form of evolution,
Anti Darwin beaks. Because I keep eating these birds, the
(44:12):
whole island just evolves. So in an eternal war with Darwin,
it's the Anti Darwin Island has a plague? Can we
pitch this show instead of that when we were talking
about earlier? I feel like it's a good spin off.
Benson and Jerry go to Galapagos together and fight Charles Darwin.
(44:32):
I'm Kevin Smith. Welcome to Anti Darwin Island. It's like,
oh god, I don't know. I'm not even going to
bring up that show that's island based because Max might
be listening. But it's bad. There's like a man, yeah really, yes, yeah,
that's the one I'm talking about. It's so it's so bad,
(44:56):
I'm going to bleep it out because I don't I know.
Max has like unrestricted access to the Internet and I
don't want them finding it and spend and chooses to
spend that time immersed in horrors and still yes, still
there's something too horrible, much too horrible. Um, well, so
(45:16):
we did it. We I feel like these animals could
definitely have an SCP entry. They are horrifying and they
don't seem real. They kind of seem made up. But
that's just what the government wants you to think, so
that you know, when the war against humans from the
(45:36):
wasps comes, they can step in and be the heroes.
That's my conspiracy theory. I would punch up the COPA
pod entry a little bit if I was if I
was doing SEP editing, I'd be like something, Yeah, it
needs a creature redesign. But I like the concept of
digging into someone's head and forming a goatee, Like I
feel like that's the start of something pretty. I think
(46:00):
I would at least say the broccoli is poison yeah, yeah,
or our second organism living on it, maybe like a
like a another element of conflict. Yeah. I probably wouldn't
just land on Oh what do you think? It is?
(46:22):
So much of science is that though? Just like I
don't know, what do you think? Yeah? Well, before we go,
I would like to play a little game with you guys. Oh,
that's fun and let's do it. It's a man I refuse,
I refuse, Katie. It is called the Mystery Animal Sound
(46:46):
game Guess Who's squawking? Every week I play a mister
animal sound and you the listener, and you the guest,
try to guess who's squawking. It could be any animal
in the world, anyone. This is the fartiest floor of
the giant couple. How'd you guess? God? Now I have
to get a different one. Han, okay, all right, all right,
I gotta gotten goe. So this was last week's mystery
(47:10):
animal sound. This was the hint. It's not a cool,
refreshing Italian treat, but a lip smacking animal. Nonetheless, you
share my not an Italian treat, Galan, No, you haven't
even listened to the sound. How would you know? That
(47:39):
is filthy? How dare you? Here's another one? Hello, m
Well whoever her husband is doing something right? Oh? I
(48:03):
don't know what it is, but I feel like I
shouldn't be listening to it. Well. Congratulations to Aunt b,
Joey p and Ariel who all guess correctly that this
is the gelata, not gelato or gelato, but the gelata.
(48:26):
What is that. What does it look like? What is
gelata is? It's abruptoli with a with a tear goat.
It's a goat that likes to party almost. It's kind
of like a baboon. Okay, okay. So it is a
species of Old world monkey that live in the Ethiopian highlands,
and they look a lot like baboons, but they are
(48:49):
just a close relative. They are very complex socially. They
have like very like hierarchical societies, a lot of complex
social interactions, and they can also smack and move their
lips to manipulate sounds in a way that is extremely
similar to human speech, more so than any other primate.
(49:14):
Congratulations gelatas. Yeah, they can make fun of us really effectively.
I'm a human man, that's you. I've got marital problem
because I'm a human. Oh, by the force, I don't
even have flared up anal glands. Got us monkey, I
(49:38):
have a concept of the future. It makes me sad. Oh,
it's funny, because it's true. I like to ride my bicycle. Yeah,
they're constantly making fun of us, but yeah, it's it's
it is uncanny when you hear them like that clip
I just had you listened to it sounds like a
person just kind of going like, okay, yeah, it's kind
(50:04):
of offensive. We really got our numbers, really hurt my feelings.
Well onto this week's mystery animal sound. The hint is
there a frog in your mouth? Or are you just
happy to see me? Hang on? The sound hasn't played,
so you can't you can't guess. Okay, it sounds like
a Miss Piggy choke. I'm gonna I'm gonna guess Miss Piggy.
(50:29):
Oh man again, I'm really sorry to Max's parents. I
feel like he's gonna know what a muppet is. Eight. Oh,
that's a spider party horn. All the legs make different tones.
(50:53):
That's fun harmonica. Yeah, that's how a spider complaint while
it's being paralyzed. Dauber any other guesses? You guys, are
you gonna go with spider party horn? Malaysian mouth frog? Wow?
Close but no, get it? No? Close but no. It's
(51:16):
probably the same baboon from earlier, Just like messing with us.
It's actually the sound of the broccoli being stepped on.
Of course, it's a giant coupa pod broccoli being squashed
by a clumsy coupa pod scientist. The actual answer that's
not broccoli, or is it. I'll keep you in suspense.
It'll be released next week with next creature feature. Wow,
(51:40):
I can speak good human sentence. I'm not a gelt
of blah. Thank you for having us, Katie, I'm a
human bro Look at me. I'm on a podcast. I'm
converting mcvin Smith. Mamma bo, I'm converting. Well, thank you
(52:01):
guys for joining me today. Where can people find you? Rockwall,
you do the plug. You can find us at You
can find us at one nine hundred hotdog dot com.
We are the final home of text based comedy on
the Internet. That's right, We're still doing that and I
guess you can't stop us because everything in the world
has tried. You can also find us on our own podcast,
(52:23):
The Dog Zone nine thousand two g's two z's, three
zeros and it's the best title in the world and
we'll never take any feedback on it. Perfect plug. Nice.
I think I know what would stop you some mud,
dauber wasps and a plane. Wow. That's so dark, such
(52:47):
a dark sign off. Well, thank you guys so much
for listening. Again. I apologize to Max's parents. He did
request this episode and wrote it for me, so all
the all the scary things in it where his fault
blame him and under the bus. Thank you guys so
much for listening. If you're enjoying the show and you
(53:08):
leave a rating and review, that's great. I print them
all out. I turn it into a giant keeper mache
effigy of what I like to call a statue of
the listener, and it's kind of human shaped, and you know,
I keep it in my house. Normal stuff. And thank
you to the Space Cossacks where they're a super awesome song.
(53:30):
Exlumina Creature features a productive iHeartRadio. For more podcasts like
the one you just heard, visit the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast,
or Hey Guess what? Or have you listened to your
favorite shows? See you next Wednesday. Every Birthday, Max Spider Party,
Horn
Welcome to Creature feature production of iHeartRadio. I'm your host
of Many Parasites, Katie Golden. I studied psychology and evolutionary biology,
and today on the show we are securing, protecting, and
containing some mysterious cryptids that are very much real. If
you're a fan of weird internet culture, you've probably heard
of the SCP Foundation, a mysterious compendium of top secret,
(00:31):
totally real, transdimensional paranormal phenomena. It's said that the SCP
Foundation is an example of collaborative writing fiction and sure
it's fictional. That's totally not something a super top secret
organization would say. So I'm going to go through some
real life documented animals who could easily be SCP entries.
(00:53):
From the Grim Reaper who floats in the midnight Zone,
to a pile of undead spiders. These creatures have all
been found to data expunged. Discover this and more as
we answer the agele question Eric Data redacted. Joining me
today our hosts of the one nine hundred hot dog
podcast dog Zone nine thousand, Robert Brockway and Shan Maybe
(01:19):
perfect pronunciation perfect, nobody ever does the extra gees and
Z's thank you Yeah there's two gs, two z's. I'm
Sean Baby, I studied volleyball and bud light Nice, I'm
Robert Brockway, and thank you for containing and hopefully protecting me. Yeah,
and securing, don't forget securing. Well, that's impossible. So the
(01:42):
inspiration for this episode actually came from a young listener
named Max who asked me to do an episode about
animals that could be the subject of the SEP Foundation.
It is this quote unquote fictional website where they have
Wikipedia entries that are meant to look like they come
(02:03):
from this shadowy governmental organization, where they describe the things
that they secure contain, protect transdimensional creepy paintings, animals that
are half an animal, creepy things that follow you around,
and a candy bowl. I think that's haunted anyways. So
(02:27):
I when you say young, how are we talking like
thirty five young or like thirty five years young? I think,
what did they say? I think they're around eight years old, okay,
and they're Yeah, they're loose on the Internet. It's just
free to roam, free to roam. SCP. Be careful out there.
It's a while on waking Internet. But yeah, the SEP foundation.
(02:49):
It's I think it kind of there's a bunch of
media to like video games and creative videos. I think
like it's in the same genre as like the slender
Man stuff, where it's like this spooky Internet stuff that
is made to seem like found footage or something that
(03:11):
someone caught in real life. My daughter loves this kind
of stuff as soon if there's some sort of a
meta narrative going on of like a cartoon getting corrupted
by darkness, that's like that's her thing. Yeah, I go
down the rabbit hole of user generated content for that
stuff all day. Yeah, it's fun. I do like Haunted SpongeBob,
(03:31):
where it's like, oh, it's an episode of SpongeBob, but
it's haunted. M Oh yeah, I'm so out of touch
with the kids these days that that that just confounds
and baffles me. Haunted SpongeBob, I don't even have a
picture of what that might be the idea a lot
of them. Actually, it helps that SpongeBob has those like
(03:54):
watercolor paintings that they do sometimes where it's like super
realistic close up of squid words face and you can
see all the pores. It's already I think verging on
nightmare Fuel that show and speaking of nightmare Fuel, under
the Sea, the first entry in our sep Secure Creature podcast,
(04:16):
Yeah you did there? Yeah, uh is found in the
midnight zone, quite literally, the midnight zone in the ocean.
What do you guys think of when you think of
the midnight zone? Probably reading ocean books with my daughter,
(04:37):
it comes up a lot. It's one of her favorites.
She loves these, uh these types of creatures. I guess
this is all my point of reference. This is fantastic.
I do not have a creepy daughter, so uh I
wish I did. But uh I, I could have a
(05:00):
creepy I could have several creepy daughters if I wanted to.
That'd be really good at that. Maybe I got Maybe
I got a new life goal. It's just to start
a little, a little weird creepy family. He just bother
about this diggy and depths. I think of like a
knockoff twilight Zone, like a twilight Zone that's on like
the Sci Fi Channel in two thousand and three and
(05:23):
ran for most of a season. Yeah, welcome midnight Zone,
Kevin Bacon. You think Carmen Elector in two thousand and three.
Kevin Smith. Ah, yeah, I feel that really good. What
if it was the real Jersey the best Guy, but
(05:43):
instead of being made out of people, we was made
out of pizza. Huh what a Kevin Smith impression? My god,
dat What would you do if you were really deep
in the ocean and all the fish were dark, but
with a little light bulb on their heads? Hi, I'm
telling me. Farland The Midnight Zone spooky Music, seven or
(06:10):
seven entire episodes. Here's what kids love. Todd McFarland's Spawn references. Yeah,
now that show is a big hit. Haunted, Haunted Spawn.
The kids love Haunted Spawn, well, the biggest name on
the Internet. The Midnight Zone is a very real place
in the ocean, found around a thousand to four thousand
(06:31):
meters or three thousand, three hundred to thirteen thousand feet
under the sea. And that's a lot of feet. It's
so many feet. It is also known as the bathy
Pleagic Zone. It is an area of the ocean so
deep that no sunlight can penetrate it. No photosynthesis or
(06:55):
sun tanning can occur here. It is pitch black, well
and wet, and it's real. It's somehow, it's wetter than
the normal ocean down there, Like, it's weird how that happens.
It's James Cameron keeps an office down there. It's just
to get away. It's a serious wetness down there. And
(07:16):
in these depths there lurks something called the stigio Medusa gigantea,
whose name means giant medusa with the darkness like the
river of death. So the most god animal, yes, so
(07:36):
god that when he introduces himself, he's just like, okay
that let looped back around from scary to like I'm
gonna bully you a little bit now. Yeah. Yeah. Their
scientists are like, maybe you should have been a magician.
I don't can we went a little crazy, buddy. I
do like the idea of here's what I named the
jellyfish that dark Yeah, I named mine Todd after myself
(08:02):
and Todd McFarlane. You're just going off the deep end. Oh,
I'm going to throw you in the river sticks aka
the turilet. You're getting us whirly, the most bully jellyfish science. Yes,
so this is also known as the phantom jellyfish. There's
(08:23):
no name this jellyfish has that doesn't sound super dramatic.
And over the top. But if you see it, it
does look super dramatic and over the top. Yeah, let
me try to describe this. This looks like, um like
a little like a little hat or maybe kind of
a UFO with dryer lint tentacles of dryer land. I
like that. The try hard goth jellyfish is wearing a
(08:46):
little fedora. Yeah, that's very appropriate, and a trench coats.
A fedora with a trench coat coming out of it.
This is very like mid two thousands try hard high
school sad boy kind of. Yeah. This is someone else
first his first day of Fedora. See him they can
pull it off him? Yeah, like and everyone says no,
(09:09):
it's kind of like the It's like the vampire cost
players of the mid two thousands. Excuse me, cos players.
It's a it's a way of life. I knew. I
was friends with some of those kids. Well they're phantom
jellyfish now. So the giant Phantom jellyfish has very shy,
(09:30):
much like a mid two thousands vampire lifestyle player. They
have only been sided around one hundred times, which sounds
like a lot, but for an animal, you know, I
guess that's not a lot. That's not a lot for
a whole species. I mean, if it was like one,
it was like one like like Benson, the Haunt of
(09:51):
Jellyfish and you've seen him one hundred times. Tired about
seeing you, Benson. Sorry. So it is thought to be
found all over the world in the depths of the
ocean's midnight zone. Uh. It can grow to be over
(10:12):
thirty feet or ten meters in length. So try given
that thing a swirlieu and it weighs over ninety pounds
or forty kilograms, making it one of the largest invertebrate
predators in the ocean. This thing is a full nightmare. Yeah, yeah,
it is. Again, it's got like that little like gelatinous
(10:35):
fedorac cap kind of looks like a bowler hat made
out of a gossamer veil, and then all its tentacles
are these like sort of they look like shredded grim
reaper robe just kind of floating around there. And because
they live in the midnight zone, that grim reaper like
(10:55):
appearance renders them invisible. In these photos we see like
they kind of you know, there's almost like this little
bit of like an orange glow inside of the bell
that fedora hat that bowler cap is called the bell
of the jellyfish, and that glow is not visible. Normally
(11:15):
that that glow happens because there's light being shined on
this thing, but typically it is completely invisible to any
of the poor inhabitants of the midnight Zone who are
small enough to be eaten by this thing. They will
silently drift in this dark watery abyss and grab small
(11:35):
fish or zooplankton with their veil like tentacles. And unlike
a lot of other jellyfish, they do not have stinging tentacles,
so they don't really stun their prey. They just ensnarl them,
tangle them up in their tentacles, smother them, and then
eat them. It's hardcore, Benson. Yeah, take it easy, Benson.
(11:57):
There's like probably no good way to die in the
midnight Zone. Like if you're being chumped to death by
a by a bowler hat, you're like, all right, it's
something like that. Yeah, Yeah, that's that's what to be
expected of the midnight Zone. I'm Kevin Smith. It's definitely
not the worst way to die. That will discuss on
this podcast today. Oh good, Yeah, that's the direction we're going,
(12:22):
all right, I hope you love it. Max to my
eight year old listener, here's a terrifying way to die
in the ocean. They requested it loves it. So though
they are a silent phantom death stalker of the depths,
their prey tends to be very small. Uh. These very
(12:44):
small fish sometimes zooplankton, which means that a larger, more
daring fish has an opportunity for what for a findship,
So they really only like to kill you if you scream.
That's the that's the phantom jellyfish one. So the Pelaso
Bathia pleagica aka pleagic brochila. Which usually when I have
(13:09):
like two names for something, one name is at least
recognizable or less goofy Uh, this one is just like
this one is either Theelaso Bathio pleagica or pleagic brothula brochila,
which other whichever you want. Brochilla. See, I thought that
was a joke name. I thought you're like, he's brochilla.
He is. He is actually bro chilla, which is funny.
(13:32):
He is a relatively ugly fish. Uh. It's this dark,
purply brown. It kind of looks like a an elongated
plum groove fish parts it's like shaped sort of like yeah,
it's with eyeballs in a fin. It's shaped like a
stubby eel. It grows around nine inches or a little
(13:55):
over twenty two centimeters long. I'm just gonna say it
for the record. God should be a shame to himself.
This is where you never expected us to go to
the midnight zone. This is where he hides all of
the screw ups. Yeah, you shouldn't go down there. That's
the first draft folder. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, eh, well
we'll put these here in the ocean, and it's like,
don't you love us? Don't you love us? God? Oh yeah,
(14:20):
just go down there. But you can't see us down here.
All the better to treasure you with my heart's eyes. Oh, Benson,
you got a lot of character. So it looks like
the sidewalk after someone like lost an elbow to it,
Like it just looks like a human elbow smeared across. Yeah,
(14:42):
with a face with a face, yeah, like or you
pulled sort of like a giraffe tongue out in stead
a fish face on it. It's it's like a swimming infection,
for sure. I've got it. I've got this is a
golden eye face unwrapped from the polygons. Oh oh God,
that makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit.
(15:03):
So it is thought that the pleagic brochilla is indeed
a brochilla to the phantom jellyfish. It lives in the
jellyfish's bell, So that little bowler cap that makes it
look like a huge nerd uh, this little guy, this
fish swims in there and removes parasites. Meanwhile, the fish
(15:25):
gets a free meal and is provided shelter inside of
the jellyfish's bell. So they are he may be ugly,
but at least he eats bacteria out of a douchebags hat.
I live, I live in the grim Reaper's hat. It's
like this jellyfish is really trying to get a vibe going,
(15:46):
like I stop the night in the midnight zone and
me too. Okay, y, I'm gonna need you to get
back in my hat. Hello, you're about to meet You're
gonna eat that weird moon caterpillar. Yeah, he kind of,
he does. His vibes are definitely different from the jellyfish.
(16:08):
The jellyfish is more goth and this one is a
little bit more like Cronenberg's mistake. M hm. I would
watch this children's show though. Yeah, like you put those
two together. That's an odd couple I could get behind.
It's Benson and Jerry living in the midnight zone eating
little fish, going around looking like God's mistakes. Perfect theme
(16:33):
song for it too, we were We're already most of
the way there. Let's pitch it. Come get me, Netflix,
I'm here to write your new children's show. I'm already
writing the pitch dick. Yeah, doing some illustrations, but goth
in the scab. Just make sure all of the characters
look like donated organs that have grown bad faces already done.
(16:57):
They all look like inserts from SpongeBob. So spiders, how
you guys feel about spidies? Strongly against, mildly against? Oh
there we go, let them live if they're in a
(17:19):
corner or something. Yeah, you just do your thing. Wow, real,
real sort of benevolent god you are to the spiders.
I feel like I could be the kind of guy
that would put a spider outside, but that's just not
an option in my house. If I hear like a
random scream, I don't. I don't panic anymore. I'm just like, oh,
you found a spider. Yeah. I am the type of
(17:41):
person to gently pick up a little spider. I actually
hold it just by one of its little little arms
and go like, come with me, a little spidy. We're
going outside, and it just walks next to me and yeah,
and just like here you go go outside, you are.
I give a little kiss packed in a tiny brown
(18:02):
paper bag full of lunch. It's just flyguts. So there
is a Twitter thread by someone named Adam Roy documenting
the subreddit aptly named spiders Just spiders the subreddit which
is a great subreddit. I love it, and Adam Roy
(18:24):
found this great story on it. Someone from Australia posted
on the spiders subreddit for help because they kept finding
piles of dead spiders under the kitchen table. And they're
from Australia, so they're they're posting in Spiders about piles
and dead spiders and you're sitting there from Australia. I
(18:45):
wouldn't have guessed that in a million years. And they
need help. This has to be dire. I mean, their
whole life is spent just fending off and possibly accidentally
eating spiders. So if they're like, this is messed up,
you guys, I need somebody to come help me. And
then they say, by the way, I'm from Australia, You're like,
good God, No, yeah, I think in Australia they don't
(19:07):
always accidentally eat spiders. So yeah, I was trying to
be generous. I wasn't trying to offend your Australian listeners.
But yeah, you're a bunch of spider eating freaks. I
know that. Yeah, I mean I think spiders are nutritious
and delicious. If I wasn't such good friends with him,
I'd eat a spider. Why not. The true horror behind
(19:27):
this podcast, ladies and chill, Like, what I'm saying is
it chickens only got two legs and spiders got eight
of them more more more makes a whole family of
eight happily. Anyways, I'm graduated from taking them out hand
to hand in hand. Yeah, I'm gonna eat. I don't
eat spiders. I knit them tiny sweaters. So Katie eat spiders.
(19:48):
Have you ever seen a human mouth filled the spiders? Time?
Kevin Smith and here in the Midnight Zone, what if
our teeth was spiders? Makes you think, doesn't it. That's
that's one, right, that's one. Let's do that one gain. Yeah, oh,
this is still the intro. We only got seven episodes,
just put it in here. Martha was a regular lady,
(20:08):
but then she wished her teeth was spiders. Turns out
she didn't like it. It was a bad idea pile
of dead spiders Australia. But what was weird about it
was that these are all sorts of different species of spiders.
If it's like a pile of the same type of spider,
(20:29):
You're like, ah, got a pile of spiders, okay, But
it was a pile of assorted spiders, like a like
a mixed assortment of spiders. Yeah, Like they got together
and chose to die together. It's very strange. You're like,
what led to that decision? Spiders? Spider call if you
took a scoop of spider pot pourri. M yeah, that's
(20:50):
a really good way to describe this. It's a good
way to liven up a bathroom. But upon closer investigation,
it turns out the spider's legs were splayed open. And
you know how like when you see a dead spider,
as I do all the time, and I cry about it,
the legs are curled inwards. It's the classic. It's the
classic dead spider. Look. Well, the reason that dead spiders
(21:13):
have curled legs is that their legs are actually powered
by hydraulic fluid, not by muscles. So they pump this
like spider fluid through their legs, and the pumping of
this fluid is actually what makes their legs move around.
This skinness sound crazy, kat I think you had us
on the show when we talked about necrotic like hydraulic
(21:33):
spider leg pumping. That's very possible, I did. Yeah, we
talk about spider juice a lot. Yeah, this podcast should
just be called the Spider Juice Podcasts. Spider Juice with
Katie in the Dough sponsored by Spider Juice. It's real
(21:54):
spiders now juggy version through anything, Martha. So when spiders die,
as you may remember from previous shows where I have
explained this, the fluid pump system stops working and their
legs relax, which actually means that they curl up, because
(22:14):
curled up is kind of like the default position when
this fluid is not being pumped through their legs. It's
kind of like it's kind of like a party horn
when air is running through it, it's extended. But when
the airflow stops, it curls up. But just replace party
horn with spider legs and air with spider juice, and
there you go. You got a spider leg. You got
(22:34):
a party spider horn. That's how you got a party spider.
And just imagine someone like blowing into a spider and
all the legs like going, here's what I'm picturing. You're
lost in a desert island and you're there with like
all the plane crash survivors, and one of them is
a child. They're like, it's my birthday, but I don't
have any party horns. And you like pull up a
big spider that you found on the island. You're like,
(22:55):
that's all right, I know how to do this. Katie's
podcast you can tear off an here's the podcast I
read just for you eight years old, Max. So, uh,
what uh? The significance of the fact that these spiders
were found with their legs splayed open rather than curled up,
(23:18):
meant that the spiders weren't dead, They're just paralyzed. So
what do you boys think a pile of paralyzed spiders
were doing under a kitchen table and go I'm gonna say, uh,
I know Max is listening, but I'm gonna say hardcore drugs.
I was gonna say snuggling. Let's go in different directions,
(23:40):
cattle party. Uh No, hardcore drugs is actually closer to it.
This was the handiwork of a mud Dauber wasp, which
the Australian who found this pile of spiders actually did
confirm because they saw this wasp crawling out of the
(24:00):
table leg, which is a weird place to put a wasp.
But you keep your wasp. I keep my wasps well
organized in the wasp shelf, all right. So mud Daubers
are very waspy wasps. I mean, they're definite wasps shaped wasp.
They are yellow and black, usually sometimes they're more brown. Um.
(24:25):
They're different species, many different species, and they generally have
these very thin tube like waists. Yeah I got those
barbering proportions. Yeah ready, Yeah, the just in an Instagram
filter that makes you look like this wasp. I think
(24:49):
this wasp has had some work done, no doubt. That
is definitely a thorax implant. Yeah. The mud Daubers species
are found all over the world, spreading torture and death
throughout the lamp happy birthday, little child Max mud daubers.
I don't know if it's his birthday, but I feel
like it's his birthday. Yeah, if you need a party blower, Max,
(25:13):
tear off a spider leg and put it in your mouth. Uh,
don't do that so your parents don't get mad at us.
So mud mud daubers are named as such because they
construct nests out of mud. Typically, these are like sort
of tubes. Some species have really elaborate nests that they
(25:34):
kind of look like pipe organs. Sometimes they look more lumpy,
but the general thing is that they construct a tube
and in each tube they will lay an egg. But
they want their egg to be well nourished so to
provide food for their babies. This is where the pile
(25:54):
of paralyzed spiders comes in. Niche the killed a wasp,
No no hesitation, just flattened right there. Yeah. No, I don't,
I don't hold. I don't like gently escort a wasp
out of my house. That is, I mean, I'm so scared,
got no respect, got no respect for a wasp. No
(26:15):
wasps scare me because they can sting you and it hurts.
And also they just they do a lot of messed
up stuff. They got some war crimes going on, Like,
you don't need to do this as a wasp. You
could just kill them and then keep them around. But
the paralyzing them and then just leaving them there, that's
a wasp move. There's technically a reason for this serial
(26:37):
killer like move, wasp apologist. Look, I may be just
a city lawyer here, but I say this wasp had
good reason to paralyze it's victims and leave it as
food for its young Um I did it for my kids. Yeah,
every evil person says that wasp. So the wasp herself
(27:00):
cannot eat the spider. She actually just daintily SIPs the
nectar of flowers. But she will paralyze these spiders and
then take them to her nest. So she will deposit
these dead spiders into one of her nest tubes, lay
an egg on top of them, seal it up with
(27:22):
another bit of mud, and just leave. It's probably whistling
to herself going off to sip some more nectar, like
she's a fairy princess. But yeah, she has a pile
of bodies in a tube and they're still alive. Yes,
where do you keep your bodies? And a shelf labeled
(27:42):
bodies next to the I am very organized. I really
marry condo my whole death celler. So both answers are
loose table leg for me or heat my wasps and
all my bodies. It's such a good delivery system. Here
is where the torture element comes into, Like it is
(28:03):
actually very important for her to leave these spiders alive,
just immobilized, because if they're dead spiders, they go bad
and they need to be fresh. So when the egg
hatches and starts to mature over the winter, the larva
can slowly eat the spiders while they are fresh and
juicy and delicious. I'm still not on board just invent
(28:26):
preservatives or paralyzed spider. I think there's a frog that
like is a fridge. Just like talk to that guy.
You're thinking of the wood frog, which can be frozen
and then come back to life. So you go, he's
half he's halfway to a fridge instead of thousands of
(28:48):
years of evolving into a monster. He does have an
frize in his blood. Yeah, that guy's got it going on. Yeah,
so even better. The mud Dauber wasps like to kill,
specifically some of the cutest spiders in my opinion, like
you know what I mean, it's messed up. You don't
have to do that. So they like to kill jumping spiders,
(29:11):
which they're my favorite spider. I love jumping spiders. They
only cute spiders. Really, they have adorable little faces. They're
like the puppies of the spider world. Often really colorful
and amazing. They also like to kill orb weavers, who
they're not. They don't have like the cute faces of
jumping spiders, but they can be really pretty. They can
come in beautiful colors kind of almost look like sort
(29:32):
of these like floral I don't know, they just they're
like the fairies of the spider world. They're they're they're beautiful.
But they kill those and they cram like a dozen
of them into the nest tube. All these spiders are paralyzed,
not dead. They lay their egg and then the egg
will hatch into a larva that will just comfortably eat
(29:53):
its way through these still alive spiders. Sez eat it.
Wasp Yeah, suck. And the thing is mud Daubers have
not only killed spiders, but airplanes full of people. Oh see,
I told you that I know a monster when I
spot one. Yeah, what how did the store they stored
(30:15):
the whole day airplanes full of people in the middle tubes?
What was Samuel Jackson during all of this? He was
way too focused on the snakes. Snakes aren't like snakes,
I think, are not. They're not as devious as wasps.
I'm gonna get these mother father wasps off this Monday
to Friday plane. So uh, Max, you might not want
(30:39):
to listen to this deck bit um. Anyways, In nineteen
ninety six, a seven fifty seven Virgin Air flight three
oh one crashed into the Atlantic while flying from the
Dominican Republic. Crash investigators pinned the blame on a black
and yellow mud dauber, who likely built a nest in
(31:03):
one of the important external flight instruments, messing up the
air speed readings. I mean, apparently it was also like
pilot air because the pilot really should have known better,
like plane crashes are so rare, or usually like a
bunch of things have to go wrong at the same time.
It has to be like this weird coincidence of like
(31:24):
the pilot's not doing a good job, but also there's
some problem with the instruments or you have a freaking
wasp build its nest inside one of the instruments and
nobody notices it. Apparently the plane was also not stored properly,
so it's a big problem. But yeah, the plane would
not have crashed if it wasn't for this wasp. It
(31:44):
was good news to me that, like they died in
the crash and weren't like individually paralyzed by wasps and
then had eggs hatch into their still living bodies. I
wouldn't say because they died in a crash, but I'm
saying like what I was picturing as you started the story. Yeah,
(32:04):
in twenty fifteen, there was a near crash and plane
damage with no fatalities on a Gulf Stream G five
because an outflow valve got blocked with mud dauber nest material,
so they tried to do it again. I've got to
become the Alex Jones of Lost Pint. Just you see, people,
(32:26):
it's everywhere. You're not paying attention. The wasps are in
the planes. I mean, mainstream media, you can look it up.
The wasps are trying to kill us. That's a really
good Alex Jones. I can, like I can hear the
blood fressels breaking in your eyeballs, which is a bit touch.
So I think that, like, the thing is humanity. You know,
(32:49):
we're all busy fighting each other when we should be
busy fighting the wasps. M let's get them. Yeah, like
we everybody listening to this go find a wasps nest
and fight it, right, Yes, but don't do that otherwise, Max,
don't don't do that, Max. Max's parents are gonna be
(33:12):
furious with me. After it's your birthday. You're exempted from
the wasp wars. Think of the lives who would save Max. So, Fellers,
I have a photo for you. It's a picture of
(33:32):
something lying in someone's blue gloved hand. Can you describe
it to me? It is sort of Lovecraft's fly fishing hook.
M agree to that? Yeah? I like that. It's like
(33:53):
it kind of looks like a piece of weird kelp. Right,
it's got sort of a kelpie kelpie look, and it's God.
It looks like another of God's mistakes. Let's just say, yeah,
I don't trust my holes around this thing. This thing
seems like something that does stuff to holes. YEA, yeah,
that is Actually your intuition about protecting your holes is
(34:16):
very very on point here. So what we were looking at.
Is god? It really? Okay? So where do I start?
Do I start with a weird broccoli looking stuff or
the bulb broccoli? Weird broccoli, maybe the probi tendril? Yeah, okay.
So there's imagine a bulb and it kind of looks
(34:39):
like a kelp bulb. But then there's like a stem
that comes off of it, and off of that stem
is like a hammerhead. Now let's go back to the bulb.
On the other end of the bulb, it looks like
a bunch of broccoli or weird cauliflower growing off of it.
And this is all sort of a brownish greenish color,
kind of like kelp uh. And then underneath the broccoli
(35:03):
stuff is a tail that's just like a tube. This
looks like a ship. Brockway would fly in Destiny Too.
That's a Destiny drip slam Maxill love that one. Yeah. Yeah,
accessible accessible, that's why you bring us on? Is this accessible?
Universal humor? Based on my esthetic choices in Destiny Too?
(35:28):
So big ups to marine biologist doctor Jimmy Burnout on Twitter,
who provided a studying picture of this thing. There is
surprisingly scant info on this, Like there are some papers
on it. But as far as I can tell, there's
not like a lot of popular info about it. There's
(35:49):
not like a ton of sort of easily readable information
on it. Uh. Yeah, you don't get into biology to
study this. Yeah, it's not. It's not a real popular
miss mash of biological atrocities. People just you know, it's
not really a trendsetter. Yeah it is. Uh. It is
a copa pod. So this is the giant copa pod
(36:13):
Cephreon levi atum. That doesn't sound like I said it right,
but sippypop, Yeah, it legatum, tie burrow, wind to your colon.
(36:38):
It's a copa pod. It's found in the South Atlantic Ocean. U.
The giant copa pod is actually a crustacean, which is weird. Uh,
And it's weird. It's related to other copa pods, So
copa pods. There's a big group of stuff of these
little crustaceans called copa pods, and copa pods tint to
(37:00):
be very small. Often they're like they can be like
planktonically small. But the giant copa pod is an exception.
It fits comfortably in the palm of your hand or
uncomfortably embedded inside of you if you're a fish. I
knew that was coming this jee you can just spot
(37:20):
a whole dweller mile away. Yeah, so we're going to
talk about the cusk eel. You guys want to talk
about the cusk eel cuskeel cusk eel, I'm in so.
Uh the cuskeel is a family of eel like bony fish.
They uh, there are various species of cusk eel. One
(37:47):
is called the king clip. I think there's like a
pink cusk eel. Um. You know they're it's a fish
and they are unfortunate to be the targets of the
giant copa pod who likes to burrow themselves into the
cusk eel's chin. Yeah, and so their chin. I wasn't
(38:11):
expecting that the devil's goatee got a little broccoli soul patch.
Everyone's making funnier like I didn't choose it. Yeah, part
which part dangles out of the eel, the the broccoli part,
the hammer head part is embedded inside of the cuskeel. Okay, Yeah,
(38:33):
So they bury that hammer head portion of their body,
uh like under the cuskel's mouth into the flesh and
they have a tiny mouth on that hammerhead portion and
then suck the juices. Oh, I thought they were going
to take like little tiny bites of everything it eats,
like just taking a fry off of their plate every time. Yeah,
(38:57):
I'll take one of those. Just imagining this thing like
flopping around, like trying to get the fry into some
ketchup and be like you. I maybe all that. I
may be a shame on the eyes of the creator,
but I do like ketchup on my fries. Say that
you're my best friend, copa pot You'll never kill me.
(39:20):
I'd like, just give me the large fry because my
soul patch, I know, my soul patch is gonna have
a few it says. It's not now it sucks juices
out of the fish as far as I can tell, honestly.
I mean, look, if you are a giant copa pod
expert out there and I got something wrong, please let
me know. I want to talk to you, because I
(39:41):
have been able to find very little information about this thing.
I would very much not like to talk to a
giant Coupa pod expert. You've made a lot of bad choices,
Giant couple pod expert. I'm gonna end up on someone
else's body shelf. Yeah, you're something that something's going to
burrow into you. They'll have something that will burrow into you.
You're not and out of that conversation without a second
(40:02):
being yet. I think I probably on probably on purpose,
but he might just have a couple of him that
he'd forgotten his pockets. Yeah, are going to get left behind.
I mean, I've priority got a few buddies living inside me,
so you know more than merrill. Well, I mean, if
you want to rock a soul patch, it's fine. So yeah,
(40:23):
they you know, basically attached themselves under the chin. And
I bet you're wondering what that broccoli looking thing is. God,
that's sex organs it is. I have no idea what
it is. Apparently no one else does either. So yeah,
(40:49):
it's the beneficiary soulbit. It's like every every one of
these relationships is give take, there has to be a benefit,
and it's the soul patch. Like you can't if you're
a fish, you cannot grow the soul patch short of this.
So yeah, if you want one, and you really do
want one, yeah, there's a price. Yeah, there you go.
It's a usually beneficial symbiosis. I think it's what you
(41:11):
call that in the Midnight Zone. I guess, I mean
you would call it that. I guess if soul patches
were something that the Kuski all wanted. Kevin Smith, you
like my soul patch, doesn't like you, welcome to the
Midnight Zone. What if everyone's soul patches had a soul Wow?
(41:34):
That might be Okay, that's definitely one. That's episode seven.
We're going out on that. So now, I do you
want to talk to the jant cob Bought experts. You
guys couldn't figure out the broccoli. I mean maybe someone has.
I could like, it could got four chunks on it.
You can't figure out twenty five of the chunks. It
could be something that someone's figured out but I couldn't find.
(41:57):
So if you know what the pod broccoli is all about,
let me know. I would guess that what you searched
for broccoli? What is PCO broccoli? Um? I would guess
it's something to do with gosh, probably gas exchange or
aeration of some kind, just because I'm thinking it's a
(42:18):
weird surface area. Stuff like this, like branching. Weirdness of
the surface area makes me think something to do with
aeration or change. Yeah, it's probably how it goes up
and down. Maybe yeah, maybe maybe how it's like has
helps with its respiration or helps aerate its eggs. I
(42:38):
don't know. Maybe it's broccoli. It's just broccoli getting their
house for my lunch. It could just be a real,
a real sloppy as a species up. I would love that.
(43:02):
I would love that the person who preserved the specimen
dropped a piece of broccoli from their stir fry into
the jar. It's like, well, well, yeah, yeah, I'm the
only one who took this course. And now they just
they're stuck in a lie because the thing is so
rare that they're just like, nah, yeah, no, that's part
of it. That's part of the creature. Yeah, what does
(43:23):
it do? We don't science. Science doesn't know. Well, you
found one without broccoli. That's a totally new kind. I
wonder if anyone's ever tasted it. Without question, the freak
who majored in copa pot Yeah, that's what biologists used
to do. They used to taste the animals they would study,
Like Darwin definitely ate a turtle from the Gallapagos, a tortoise, sorry,
(43:48):
probably heat and I wanted or two too. You know,
they ain't got him every single kind of finch, all
those barnacles. He was obsessed with barnacles. The finches start
of all ving beaks to peck at Darwin because it's like,
Ohwin measures. This is a very interesting form of evolution,
Anti Darwin beaks. Because I keep eating these birds, the
(44:12):
whole island just evolves. So in an eternal war with Darwin,
it's the Anti Darwin Island has a plague? Can we
pitch this show instead of that when we were talking
about earlier? I feel like it's a good spin off.
Benson and Jerry go to Galapagos together and fight Charles Darwin.
(44:32):
I'm Kevin Smith. Welcome to Anti Darwin Island. It's like,
oh god, I don't know. I'm not even going to
bring up that show that's island based because Max might
be listening. But it's bad. There's like a man, yeah really, yes, yeah,
that's the one I'm talking about. It's so it's so bad,
(44:56):
I'm going to bleep it out because I don't I know.
Max has like unrestricted access to the Internet and I
don't want them finding it and spend and chooses to
spend that time immersed in horrors and still yes, still
there's something too horrible, much too horrible. Um, well, so
(45:16):
we did it. We I feel like these animals could
definitely have an SCP entry. They are horrifying and they
don't seem real. They kind of seem made up. But
that's just what the government wants you to think, so
that you know, when the war against humans from the
(45:36):
wasps comes, they can step in and be the heroes.
That's my conspiracy theory. I would punch up the COPA
pod entry a little bit if I was if I
was doing SEP editing, I'd be like something, Yeah, it
needs a creature redesign. But I like the concept of
digging into someone's head and forming a goatee, Like I
feel like that's the start of something pretty. I think
(46:00):
I would at least say the broccoli is poison yeah, yeah,
or our second organism living on it, maybe like a
like a another element of conflict. Yeah. I probably wouldn't
just land on Oh what do you think? It is?
(46:22):
So much of science is that though? Just like I
don't know, what do you think? Yeah? Well, before we go,
I would like to play a little game with you guys. Oh,
that's fun and let's do it. It's a man I refuse,
I refuse, Katie. It is called the Mystery Animal Sound
(46:46):
game Guess Who's squawking? Every week I play a mister
animal sound and you the listener, and you the guest,
try to guess who's squawking. It could be any animal
in the world, anyone. This is the fartiest floor of
the giant couple. How'd you guess? God? Now I have
to get a different one. Han, okay, all right, all right,
I gotta gotten goe. So this was last week's mystery
(47:10):
animal sound. This was the hint. It's not a cool,
refreshing Italian treat, but a lip smacking animal. Nonetheless, you
share my not an Italian treat, Galan, No, you haven't
even listened to the sound. How would you know? That
(47:39):
is filthy? How dare you? Here's another one? Hello, m
Well whoever her husband is doing something right? Oh? I
(48:03):
don't know what it is, but I feel like I
shouldn't be listening to it. Well. Congratulations to Aunt b,
Joey p and Ariel who all guess correctly that this
is the gelata, not gelato or gelato, but the gelata.
(48:26):
What is that. What does it look like? What is
gelata is? It's abruptoli with a with a tear goat.
It's a goat that likes to party almost. It's kind
of like a baboon. Okay, okay. So it is a
species of Old world monkey that live in the Ethiopian highlands,
and they look a lot like baboons, but they are
(48:49):
just a close relative. They are very complex socially. They
have like very like hierarchical societies, a lot of complex
social interactions, and they can also smack and move their
lips to manipulate sounds in a way that is extremely
similar to human speech, more so than any other primate.
(49:14):
Congratulations gelatas. Yeah, they can make fun of us really effectively.
I'm a human man, that's you. I've got marital problem
because I'm a human. Oh, by the force, I don't
even have flared up anal glands. Got us monkey, I
(49:38):
have a concept of the future. It makes me sad. Oh,
it's funny, because it's true. I like to ride my bicycle. Yeah,
they're constantly making fun of us, but yeah, it's it's
it is uncanny when you hear them like that clip
I just had you listened to it sounds like a
person just kind of going like, okay, yeah, it's kind
(50:04):
of offensive. We really got our numbers, really hurt my feelings.
Well onto this week's mystery animal sound. The hint is
there a frog in your mouth? Or are you just
happy to see me? Hang on? The sound hasn't played,
so you can't you can't guess. Okay, it sounds like
a Miss Piggy choke. I'm gonna I'm gonna guess Miss Piggy.
(50:29):
Oh man again, I'm really sorry to Max's parents. I
feel like he's gonna know what a muppet is. Eight. Oh,
that's a spider party horn. All the legs make different tones.
(50:53):
That's fun harmonica. Yeah, that's how a spider complaint while
it's being paralyzed. Dauber any other guesses? You guys, are
you gonna go with spider party horn? Malaysian mouth frog? Wow?
Close but no, get it? No? Close but no. It's
(51:16):
probably the same baboon from earlier, Just like messing with us.
It's actually the sound of the broccoli being stepped on.
Of course, it's a giant coupa pod broccoli being squashed
by a clumsy coupa pod scientist. The actual answer that's
not broccoli, or is it. I'll keep you in suspense.
It'll be released next week with next creature feature. Wow,
(51:40):
I can speak good human sentence. I'm not a gelt
of blah. Thank you for having us, Katie, I'm a
human bro Look at me. I'm on a podcast. I'm
converting mcvin Smith. Mamma bo, I'm converting. Well, thank you
(52:01):
guys for joining me today. Where can people find you? Rockwall,
you do the plug. You can find us at You
can find us at one nine hundred hotdog dot com.
We are the final home of text based comedy on
the Internet. That's right, We're still doing that and I
guess you can't stop us because everything in the world
has tried. You can also find us on our own podcast,
(52:23):
The Dog Zone nine thousand two g's two z's, three
zeros and it's the best title in the world and
we'll never take any feedback on it. Perfect plug. Nice.
I think I know what would stop you some mud,
dauber wasps and a plane. Wow. That's so dark, such
(52:47):
a dark sign off. Well, thank you guys so much
for listening. Again. I apologize to Max's parents. He did
request this episode and wrote it for me, so all
the all the scary things in it where his fault
blame him and under the bus. Thank you guys so
much for listening. If you're enjoying the show and you
(53:08):
leave a rating and review, that's great. I print them
all out. I turn it into a giant keeper mache
effigy of what I like to call a statue of
the listener, and it's kind of human shaped, and you know,
I keep it in my house. Normal stuff. And thank
you to the Space Cossacks where they're a super awesome song.
(53:30):
Exlumina Creature features a productive iHeartRadio. For more podcasts like
the one you just heard, visit the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast,
or Hey Guess what? Or have you listened to your
favorite shows? See you next Wednesday. Every Birthday, Max Spider Party,
Horn
Creature Feature News
Host
Katie Goldin
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