Bonus: Listener Stories, Episode 11

In this bonus episode we hear from listeners in the Family Secrets community. To share your secret, call 1-888-SECRET-0.

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm
Danny Shapiro, and this is family Secrets, the secrets that
are kept from us, the secrets we keep from others,
and the secrets we keep from ourselves. I've heard from

(00:23):
so many about your own family secrets and realize that
what we are creating for each other on this podcast
is a community, a community for those who are looking
for a safe and supportive space to unburden themselves. To
that end, we've created a number for listeners to call
in to record stories to share here in this space.

(00:44):
This week, I'd like to share a few of those
stories from our community. Thanks for listening, Hi, I just
wanted to share a little bit about my family secret UM.
I was raised by my mom and did not know
my father, and a about a year ago, I chose
to do UM a DNA test and connected with my

(01:08):
father's first cousin. We eventually found out UM and I
did end up contacting my father UM. It took about
three contacts and it took about four months for him
to find me get back with me because he did
not believe that I was his daughter. So we did
meet and we did a DNA test and of course

(01:30):
it showed that he was my father, and since then
it became a very rocky road. Um. He it turns out,
is a member of the Catholic Church, and um is
a Catholic deacon, and he very much did not want
this to become public knowledge, even though I was conceived

(01:51):
prior to him becoming a deacon and prior to his
marriage to his wife. Currently, so I was told to
refrain from telling anybody, and um he made it known
that I was not to contact any other members of
his family. UM. So she stated that he did want

(02:15):
a relationship with me, but that relationship with me was
a monthly lunch meeting. So I chose eventually to cut
the relationship off because it just wasn't healthy. Um. But
I am the secret, and I have two sisters that

(02:38):
will never know me, and grandmother and aunt out there
that will never know me. And that's my secret. My
secret is actually my grandma's secret. She died a couple
of months ago, and um, it was a very uh
traumatic thing, I think for myself mostly. Uh. She was

(03:02):
the heart surgery. She was left on bypass. Her chest
opened for a few days, and she was awake and
aware for some of it and able to write me notes. UM.
It was obviously a painful death for me and my family,
But we found out from her sister and her best

(03:25):
friend afterwards that my grandma had actually known two years
prior that she needed to get the surgery. But at
that same point in time, she had found out that
her husband was secretly UH spent all their money and
had racked up a lot a lot of money in debt,

(03:46):
and she felt she couldn't afford surgery, and none of
us have confronted him to tell him that we know
what was going on there. And she decided to clean
houses for the last two years and make as much
money as she could because she wanted to get out
of that debt that caused, and she kind of worked

(04:10):
herself to death. Her heart couldn't handle the stress of
working and UH when it already needed help. And so
we feel a little I feel a little bit like
he caused her death. But I still get on the
phone with him and talk to him and and say
things like I love you. And it's really hard to reconcile, um,

(04:35):
feeling like someone caused something and not being able to
really say anything to them about it, and to know
that she was holding onto a lot of things that
she never wanted to tell us out of out of
shame or anything else. And Uh, I'm really glad my
aunt broke the secret. I guess. So that's my secret, thanks. Yeah.

(05:02):
My secret is one that I've held for a very
long time. When I was seven years old and living
in public housing in New Orleans, I was molested by
one of my neighbors and I never spoke a word
of it too my parents or even my siblings, just

(05:25):
because I I didn't think that they would be able
to handle it. Um. I wasn't sure how they would react,
and I felt like I would have let them down
for not being strong enough and being able to fight back.
So I held on to the secret for a very

(05:46):
very long time. It wasn't until I was twenty three
and I spoke to one of my very close friends
about it after the topic came up and speaking about
it for the first time in still when he is,
I just broke down and I could barely talk about it.

(06:08):
But after that instant, I started to open up more.
I opened up and told my fiance in an incident,
but until this day, I still have not told even
one of my parents, are any of my siblings or
any of my real close family, because I'm still not
sure how to tell them this news, how to tell

(06:30):
them what happened so long ago, and even why I
helped it for so long. But as each day goes
by and as I open up more and more, things
do get a little easier. So that's my family's secret,
and I'm not sure how long it will stay a secret,

(06:51):
but hearing everyone else open up has kind of inspired me.
Maybe I should open up. Maybe I'll help incipate. So
thank you for this podcast. Thank you father, look what
you do. If you'd like to share your story, call

(07:17):
one eight eight eight Secret zero and record your story.
We won't be able to run all the stories, but
we do want to shine a light on as many
as we can. The number again is one eight eight
eight Secret and then the numeral zero. For more podcasts

(07:44):
for my Heart Radio, visit the I Heart Radio app,
Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.