August 17, 2018 • 32 mins
Should you find yourself in an unfamiliar star system without your copy of 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy', this episode will help fill you in on the local fare, from perfectly normal beast sandwiches to pan galactic gargle blasters.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:08):
Hello, and welcome to food Stuff. I'm Any and I'm
Lauren Vogelbaum and Odd's time for another fictional foods episode.
Yeah it's been a minute, but we are here today
to talk about fictional foods. Hitchhiker's Guy to the Galaxy edition. Yes, yeah, oh,
and we've we've also got a special treat for you
guys today. At the end of the episode, a listener
(00:30):
sent in some trivia, some fictional food trivia. Yeah, all right,
I believe I am a fan, and I believe Lauren
that you are a fan as well. I am very
much a fan. It was one of those I got
a hold of a copy of I think the Whole trilogy,
which is five books, um in early high school, and
(00:51):
it was one of those revolutionary things for me, Like
it was just total paradigm shift. I was like, oh, oh,
this is so good. I think I had the same copy,
and I let someone borrow it. If you're listening, I
want it back. I can't remember who you are, but
(01:12):
I will find you. I lost my copy as I was,
because I meant to reread at least the first book
when I was when when when we decided to do
this episode and I it's it's not there. It's probably
the same person. That person just collecting coffees on top
(01:32):
of coffees for what purpose. We don't know. Well, one
day we'll figure it out. But I wanted to start
with my favorite quote, which I do remember. I think
it's from the restaurant at the end of the universe.
He's spending a year dead for tax reasons. I just
remember that because I like read that and I was
(01:53):
what eleven So I don't know anything about taxes. I
don't have to pay taxes, but for some reason, it's
as my mom said, overturned my ticklebox and I just
kept laughing and laughing and laughing. It's such a really,
it's a really clear memory for me, apparently. Yeah. Yeah,
(02:13):
And we have mentioned Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy before
in a couple of past episodes like um Gin and
Tonics to mind. Yeah, and as per the used with
these fictional food episodes. Thanks to Wikia fandom. So helpful,
so helpful. Oh yes, yes, hats off to you all, brave,
(02:36):
brave soldiers a fandom. Yes, we appreciate your efforts. So
what is it? The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is
a comedic media series almost entirely written by earth human
Douglas Adams. It started as a BBC radio show in
nine and was adapted into a while popular series of novels,
(03:01):
plus stage shows, video games, a television series in one,
a feature film in two thousand five, and more other
radio shows. That's a lot it is. Douglas Noel Adams
was a writer who was rather famous for not writing, Um,
I love deadlines, he wrote, I like the whooshing sound
they make as they fly by. He was born in Cambridge, England,
(03:25):
in nineteen fifty two. His uh father, a teacher, and
his mother, a nurse, divorced when he was five. He
was a fan of Monty Python and he decided to
try to get into writing comedy. Took a whole lot
of odd jobs while he was doing it, and Uh
the Chhiker's Guide radio show was an unexpectedly resounding hit
that moved him into writing full time. The novels almost
(03:48):
didn't happen because the BBC was like, oh, novel adaptations
of radio series never worked, let's not even try. That's fools.
But happened. They did. Also all of those other things
and although Adams would struggle with depression and writer's block
and and kind of the weight of that early success.
(04:10):
He'd go on to to do work, a work in
writing that helped protect endangered species. He married, he had
a daughter, he've had a ridiculous collection of electric guitars. Um,
and he would die suddenly in two thousand one when
he was just forty nine. UM. And every year on
fans and friends celebrate his strange life and legacy with
(04:31):
Towel Day day on which to openly carry a towel
with you, because, as The Hitchiker's Guide taught us, a
towel is one of the most useful objects in the universe,
and you should never go anywhere with that one. I
actually have. It's a yellow one, and it's one of
those ones that gets like super small, and it is
really absorbant and tries really quickly, you know, just in
(04:52):
case it's good, it's you know, it could be a food.
Who really knows where your towel is? This is true. Uh,
if if you have rather no idea what we're talking about,
and I'm I'm so sorry if I drop more British
isms than usual into this particular episode. It's thinking about it.
His my brain in a very English place right now.
(05:13):
The eponymous Hitchhiker's Guide is this a galactic travel guide?
And the media series are about the adventures or misadventures
of another Earth human by the name of Arthur Dent,
traveling galactically. Uh. And despite this, the series are way
more about the hilariously mundane things in life than they
are about science fiction e things. Uh. Adams actually said
(05:36):
that he never intended the series to be science fiction,
but that he blew up the Earth in the first
episode spoiler alert, and he sort of had to. Yeah,
sort of difficult not to go elsewhere if the planet
no longer exists. Yes, uh So one of those hilariously
mundane things about life, the universe and everything is food
(05:59):
and drink. So there's a lot of that in the series. Um.
A lot of the series are actually just about Arthur
trying and failing to get a decent cup of tea. Yeah,
which we talked about a little bit in our episode. Yeah. Yeah,
And I have I have a have a quote for you.
Stop me at any time. I'll just go on forever
(06:20):
on the the first spaceship that that Arthur. I guess
it's the second spaceship, isn't it that Arthur winds up
on I Know how dare I? Um It says he
had found a new traumatic machine which had provided him
with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost,
but not quite entirely unlike tea. The way it functioned
(06:41):
was very interesting. When the drink button was pressed, it
made an instant but highly detailed examination of the subjects
taste buds, a spectroscopic analysis of the subject's metabolism, and
then sent tiny experimental signals down the neural pathways to
the taste centers of the subject's brain to see exactly
what was likely to go down. Well, however, no one
knew quite why it did this, because it invariably delivered
(07:01):
a cup full of liquid that was almost, but not
quite entirely unlike tea. That's one of the things I
love about um these books is that it it's there's
all these kind of high tech robot and it's trying
to understand humans, and humans just don't make sense. Essentially,
(07:23):
is the joke, Like I've done all this math and
calculations but nothing is working, or just yeah, beings, like
living beings at their core, are completely nonsensical. Yeah yeah, um.
Book menus dot com has a breakdown of the most
mentioned food and drinks. Because there are, like teeth, a
(07:44):
lot of things from Earth show up in the series
a lot. They're just usually viewed differently, and we will
talk a little bit about that more later. But te peanuts,
corn flakes, McDonald's, hamburger, jello, don't it's very important, custard,
hot dogs, and rice pudding. Um. And if you're interested,
(08:07):
they have a lot more information following all of that.
Take a very long time to go through, but more
power to you if you want to know. Oh, absolutely, yes.
So that's a basic overview. We're gonna pause for a
quick break forward from our sponsor and then get into
some specifics and we're back. Thank you sponsored you. So
(08:39):
we have two sections here, foods and drinks, and we're
gonna start with foods, and we're going to start in
that subsection vegan rhino a k A. Evil smelling meat,
and by vegan rhino, is it is it vegan? Is it? Nope?
It's not. What's your thinking? Probably vegan here does not
(09:02):
necessarily mean what it means on Earth. It means from
the Alpha Learius star system, oh like vega like vague
vegan vegan not vegan. Yeah, I get it, it's so Joe.
Speaking of meat, there are also a perfectly normal beasts
which happened to pass through this a particularly superstitious settlement
(09:24):
on a planet called Lamuela. Periodically. Um, when Arthur crash
lands there and is asked why the Almighty Bob sent him, Um,
he sets himself up as the Almighty Bob's sandwich maker.
Oh important job, yeah yeah, um, and his primary ingredient
for these sandwiches is perfectly normal beast. For upon Lammuela,
(09:45):
every aspect of making the humble sandwich has been developed
beyond the dreams of even the picnic food epicures on
Thermos Magnus ex Mm hmm sounds good. Yeah sure. In
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, which is
a book about a fictional restaurant within that book, they
(10:07):
serve scentiate and suicidal meat, self serving you see. Yeah. Yeah,
it's explained as being the most humane choice, you know,
Rather than get tangled up in whether it's okay to
eat regular animals and plants which cannot consent um, someone
bred a type of cow that actively wants to be eaten?
What a life? Were good evening, Madame and gentlemen, I
(10:35):
am the main dish of the day. May I interest
you in parts of my body? Huh? Well, something off
my shoulder, perhaps raised in a little white wine sash.
There's the hagro biscuit, and this is a dntra se specialty,
a lower quality food stuff that they served to the Bogans,
(10:58):
whom they detested. The Tracy were known for having really
nice food, but they made pure crap for the Wogans.
So anyone expecting nice and trassy food but got something
they made with the Wogans in mind was going to
be disgusted and surprised. Um. And I'm not sure what
this is that the Internet will return a result of
(11:20):
a blue bread topped with guacamole. Well, that's what it
looks like. I have no idea what's actually going on.
It's a bright blue bread dot with something bright green
fill in as you imagine, imagine agencies fit. Um. There's
star Bicks, which is a cereal brand Algoleian zilot burger,
(11:41):
which Zafa biebl Brocks described as quote a kind of
meat burger made with the most unpleasant parts of a
creature well known for its total lack of any pleasant
part that sounds appetizing, and as we mentioned earlier, earth food.
Several Earth foods show up throughout this series, but in
different ways than we would expect. For instance, beer is
(12:06):
used as a muscle relaxant, although I would say you
could argue some of us use it that way absolutely.
Oh yeah, yeah. Peanuts are sort of protein supplement, uh
and t tea can power alien and probability machines quote
the principle of generating small amounts of finite improbability by
(12:27):
simply hooking the logic circuits of a bimboolweeny fifties seven
submission brain to an atomic vector plotter suspended in a
strong Brewnian motion. Producer say a nice hot cup of tea, where,
of course well understood. Of course, when human Arthur Dent
(12:47):
confused computers by asking for tea, they asked him why,
and his response was it makes me happy. Oh yeah,
that's kind of nice, Poor Arthur. Yeah, poor Arthur. Coffee,
on the other hand, um and specifically stirring it has
sort of a butterfly effect on bistro mathematics. Yes, bistro
(13:09):
mathematics is an understanding of numbers that accepts that numbers
are not absolute but dependent on the movement of the
observer in restaurants. Yes, uh quote. Just as Einstein observed
that time was not an absolute but depended on the
observer's movement in space, and that space was not an
absolute but dependent on the observer's movement in time, it
(13:31):
is now realized that numbers are not absolute but dependent
on the observer's movement in restaurants. Yeah I love this,
uh so yeah so so, Like the number of people
a table is reserved for versus the number of people
who wind up eating um, and the time that the
party is supposed to arrive versus when they actually do,
(13:52):
and the build amount versus how much anyone who's showed
up is prepared to pay, and whether or not they
have money with them um. The work of calculating all
of these non absolute numbers can can allow you to
manipulate the very fabric of reality. Is what's going on
in bastro mathematics. There's a ship that has a beast
(14:13):
mathematics engine. The engine is made up of a robotic restaurant,
the servers and all the all the bits and pieces
are all robotic and uh, it's what it's doing is
actively calculating all of these numbers, these these non absolute numbers,
these numbers, some of which are rest of private exclusions,
(14:34):
which are numbers whose existence can only be defined as
being anything other than themselves, like time of a arrival
exactly my favorite one. So uh so so yeah, so yeah,
I'm trying trying to to to solve these equations. Can
get can get you far? I think, isn't it like
(14:56):
the most powerful something of pairs science. It's very powerful.
It is it is and it's and it's a little
bit less sticky than improbability, uh, mathematics, which is what
drives another engine involved in the series. There's a lot
of engines driven around there. Absolutely. So that's ah the
(15:20):
food overlook. But really we got to talk about some drinks. Yes, yes, okay,
First we're gonna fause for a quick break for a
word from our sponsor and we're back. Thank you sponsor, Yes,
(15:45):
thank you. All right, So the first thing we have
to talk about is Jenks spirit at old Jenks Spirit. Yes,
I think that is what it's more usually called um
and this is a spirit people drink it for the
same multitude of reasons we do, but it's way stronger
(16:07):
than most of the stuff we earthlings are familiar with.
And there are several interesting drinking games involving jank spirit,
mostly played in hyperspace sports in the Orion Beta Star system.
Here are the rules of one of them. Two people
sit across from each other at a table, glass placed
(16:28):
in front of both in a bottle of jank spirit
in the center of the table, and then both contestants
maybe fools, would sort of use the force they had
telepsychic powers and attempt to tip the bottle so that
it would pour some of the spirit into the glass
of their opponent, who would then have to check it,
(16:50):
rent and repeat, bottle after bottle. Yeah, sort of like
beer pong or Burea burea kart, but worse a lossment.
You'd probably keep losing because the alcohol, I mean, it
messes with a lot of things, but it also messes
with the telepsychic powers. Yeah. Once whatever predetermined amount of
(17:12):
jank spirit was consumed and a final winner emerged, the
loser had to perform a forfeit, which was typically an
obscene biological thing. Old jank spirit has appeared in a
couple of Star Wars properties, including the Force Unleashed two
novel and other things. And there's a drinking song there is.
(17:35):
I've been debating all day whether I was gonna sing
this or I was just gonna say it. Oh, don't
give me none more of that old Jank spirit. Now,
don't give me none more of that old Jank spirit.
For my head will fly, my tongue will lie, my
eyes will fry, and I may die. Won't you pour
me one more of that sinful old Jenks spirit. So
(17:56):
rousing tune, I'm sure. And speaking of something else, you
probably shouldn't drink pan Galactic goggle blasters. These were invented
by the characters apod Um, and they are Jenks Spirit
cocktail with one of the most explicit descriptions in the
books when it comes to food or drink item quote.
(18:19):
Take the juice from one bottle of that old Jenk spirit,
poured into one measure of water from the seas of
satire Genius five. Allow three cubes of octurin megagen megagen
to melt into the mixture. It must be properly iced
or the benzene is lost. Allow four leaders of Folly
(18:39):
and marsh gas to bubble through it over the back
of a silver spoon, floort a measure of qualactin hypermint
extract dropping the tooth of an Algolian sun tiger. Sprinkle
zam four adding olive. Drink but very carefully. There's a
(18:59):
lot of periods in there. Ellipses yes, and you should
drink it very very carefully. Is compared to quote the
alcoholic equivalent of a mugging expensive and bad for the head.
And it's like having your brain smashed out by a
slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick. Another
(19:22):
description of its potency is as follows. After two of
those babies, the dullest most by the book, Vogan will
be up on the barn stilettos, yodeling mountain shanties and
swearing he's the king of the gray binding fiefdoms of Saxoquin.
There's a lot of fun words in here. It's Inventor
(19:42):
himself advises never drink more than two pan galactic gargo
blasters unless you are a thirty ton mega elephant with
bronchial pneumonia. Who There are places you can go in
the book to rehabilitate yourself after having one one of these,
and the TV show a drop of the liquid burned
(20:03):
a hole in the floor. But despite all of this,
it carries the label the best drink in existence. You know,
it's certainly something to remember if only you could. And so,
of course, tantalized as as humans are by descriptions of
(20:25):
this sort, many people have made real life versions. Yeah.
The you can find some at the Zaffa People Blox
Bar in Ottawa, Ontario, so cool. Are the Daniel Bar
Findomond in Paris, which was also cool. I've never been
any of these places, but I've delved into their websites
(20:48):
or Wisconsin's forty two Lounge. Forty two. Yeah, yeah, it's
an important number. It is. When asked about the recipe
for the pan galactic gargo Blaster Bils Adams, the author responded, Unfortunately,
there are a number of environmental and weapons treatises, Treats
(21:08):
and Weapons Treatise and laws of physics which prevent one
being mixed on Earth. Sorry, but of course there are
real world recipes that you can find online, and one
I found from tour dot Com is as follows. One
ounce are more of absence or pestis which is sort
(21:30):
of a nearer absente um. One ounce of brandy, four
ounces chilled club soda, one teaspoon cardamom infused honey, various
oddities to garnish, and then he has a recipe on
how to make the cardamon honey. So you know, if
you're looking to try some yourself or drow a Hitchhiker's
(21:53):
Guide to the Galaxy themed party, invite us and make this. Yeah. Yeah,
I think it's basically a Tom Collins basically with with
like yeah, like like maybe something a little bit absently flavored, yeah, tustin,
a little bit of color, yeah, garnish with an olive
and speaking of um, of course the gin Anthony, which
(22:16):
I think is supposed to be Gin and the Tom Knicks,
the Gagrocaca version of Gin and Tonics, essentially only again
way stronger. That's that's a theme in this, this whole thing.
I've realized it's strong enough to kill a cow at
one hundred paces. That's a serious, serious drink. I mean,
(22:41):
all drinking is serious. Drink responsibly, yes, especially any pangalactic
charco plasters should you run across? Oh yeah, man, if
staff had ever hands you a drink, drink extremely responsibly,
by which I probably mean not at all. Yeah, yeah,
definitely do the old toss over your shoulder things. But
(23:03):
that's that brings us to the end of this our
fictional foods edition of Hit Checker's Guide of the Galaxy. Yeah, yeah,
there's you know, there's there's lots lots more in there,
and lots lots and in different different iterations of the series.
If we missed your favorite, write and listen let us
know what it is. Yeah, and if you have any recipes,
(23:23):
I mean, we'll be very impressed and very thrilled. Oh yeah, yes, always.
And speaking of sending things our away, it's time for
like being being up. Yes, everyone got that up? Sure,
(23:45):
I'm positive, Okay, Lucy wrote, I just listened to your
cod episode and was interested in the facts about cod
in Iceland as I was just there, and while I
was there, I had some of the best fish in
my life. Though I'm not positive it was cod, I
thought you guys might still find it interesting. The first
dish I had was at a restaurant that made traditional
(24:07):
Icelandic food. It was called the Fisherman's Platter, and it
was simply fish, potatoes and butter. Smashed up into a
plate of delicious. The second dish was simply fish and chips,
presumably made from cod. As you said, it is the
main fish used in this meal. It seems a bit odd.
The best fish and chips I ever had was an Iceland,
but to be fair, I've never been to England. The
(24:29):
fish was crispy and the fries were really well made.
The highlight though, was the sauce. It was like nothing
I had ever had. It was creamy and spicy and
almost soy ey. If you ever end up in Rakovic,
try to find some fish and chips. Yes, yes, I've
never been to Iceland, but I yes, I was there
(24:49):
for like one day, so you know, count um but
are one of the producers here, Paul. He spent two
weeks there recently and he was telling me about how
amazing all the fish was. Oh, I'm sure it's my list,
Janna wrote, just wanted to drop you up line regarding
the cod episode. I loved it because I'm from Newfoundland.
(25:11):
By the way, it's pronounced new found Land rhyming with
understand Uh, don't worry, I'd say about Americans and of
Canadians get it wrong. I think I just got it
wrong too. Uh. I was also born when the cod
moratorium was started. I don't remember it personally, but I
can remember from a very young age people talking about it.
(25:33):
I grew up in a small fishing village, and most
people's parents that I knew when I was little, we're
going back to school to retrain for some sort of
other job. Most people in our town were quite poor
in this time, and fisherman and others all had to
band together. Families all moved into one house to save
money on things like childcare, heat, light, et cetera. My
aunt and uncle lived with us until I was ten. Myself,
(25:54):
I was rather lucky as my mom is a nurse,
so had full time work outside of fishing and allowed
my dad to reach rain in construction. I can remember
also many old men, such as my grandfather, who fished
by handline for their whole lives. Most of them just retired.
They told stories of rowing out their dories in the morning,
filling their boats by hand when fishing cod was totally illegal.
(26:14):
The old men would sit on the docks and look
out at the water like their worlds had ended. It
was all they knew. The work was hard, but enjoyable.
They've brought back fishing now for recreational purposes. They did
it when I was about twelve or so. My grandfather
cried when you got to take me out in the
boat and I caught my first fish. Now we can
fish five fish per person per day for most weekends
in the summer. It's something people do for sport and
(26:35):
as a tourist attraction, though most of us get to
fill our freezers every year. Anyway, I just wanted to
tell you my personal cod story. I hope it was
interesting and informative on how this one fish effects so
many lives. Oh, absolutely, thank you, thank you for writing
writing in with that and newfound Land I should I
don't know. I feel like Captain Kirk saying it that way.
(26:58):
We're all working on Willias shut or impressions. We are stuff,
we really are. Um. Little progress has been made, but
we will continue to improve. Absolutely. And this brings us
to the aforementioned trivia trivia. Who doesn't love trivia? And
this was sent to us four ever ago, yes by
(27:21):
by by a kind listener by the name of Dina
are Dinah. I'm not sure how to pronounce it, but yes,
it was. I think she sent this when we did
our Pumpkin episode. Oh wow, that was forever a go.
So we've been hanging on to it and trying to
think of the best way to do it. But we're
going to do We're gonna read the questions off and
(27:42):
then you listeners write down your answers keep them up
in the brain. I'm not going to tell you what
to do, but in an upcoming episode we will reveal
the answers. Yes, yes, alright, So are you ready, Lauren?
I'm ready? Are you ready? Annie? I think so? Okay,
(28:03):
here we go. Number one. In this book or movie,
you can have a chewing gum meal, busy lifting drinks,
and taste of real snosberries. Question two. Dr Seuss wrote
this book on a bet that he couldn't write a
book with fifty or fewer distinct words. Number three. You'll
(28:27):
have to go to this fictional town to have a
bag of cheesy poofs or enjoy some chocolate salty balls.
Question four. When Mystery Inc. Needs to bribe their great Dane,
they use this Question five. And this TV show, the
lead character is a cook and fan of crabby patties.
(28:50):
Question six. Though you can't understand their words. These creatures
exist solely on Tubby Custard and Tubby Toast. In this show,
you can get deaf bear, eat tomacos, try to enjoy
a krusty burger, and get a flaming mo. Questionnate. This
is an old folk story in which hungry strangers convince
(29:13):
people of a town to each share a small amount
of their food in order to make a stew from
an inedible object. Question nine. This comic strip's main character
loves chocolate frosted sugar bombs. Quote their crunchy on the outside,
chewy on the inside, and they don't have a single
natural ingredient or essential vitamin to get in the way
(29:33):
of that rich fudgie taste. Question ten. On this TV show,
we learned that vitam meat of vegamin contains trace amounts
of alcohol. Number eleven. On this show, while Liz Lemon
eats cheesy blasters a Jack cheese stuffed hot dog folded
in a pizza, while her boss, Jack Donegie eats two
(29:53):
Heitian vanilla bean ice cream in a pool of cognac
drizzled in the world's most expensive chocolate Amada porcellana covered
with shaved white black and clear truffles and topped with
edible twenty five carried gold leaf. And question twelve our
final question. In this movie, characters have a big Kahuna
(30:13):
burger with a five dollar shake and discuss a food
fictional in America, arroyal with cheese. Yes. Um, those are
the questions. There are tiebreakers, oh yes, yes, which will
just will just include here. I don't know how we
would break an actual tie. Also, there's no technical prize
here other than bragging rights. Oh yes, bragg to everyone.
(30:37):
They'll be very impressed. All right, here are the tiebreakers. So, um,
the goal is to identify the movie or show based
on the fictional food. And there's three. There's three, all right,
number one milk plus number two cornballers number three stay
puffed marshmallows. All right, listeners, I hope you came up
(31:01):
with a team name. We didn't tell you to do that,
but do that now if you didn't, even if it's
just you team of yeah, you're still a team. There
is an I in team. There is it's if you
add a line to the t there you go. Can't
see it, but it's there. So stay tuned for the
(31:24):
answers and feel free to to send your your responses
before then if you want to be legit legit about it,
oh yeah, yeah, no no cheating, yes, put your phones
away or you know, yeah, just don't cheat right. If
you would like to email us, you can. Our email
is food stuff at how stuff works dot com. We're
(31:46):
also on social media. You can find us on Twitter
and Facebook at food Stuff. Hs W stands for how
Stuff Works. We're also on Instagram at food Stuff. We
hope to hear from you. Thank you as always to
our superproducer Dylan Fagan. Thank you to you for listening,
and we hope that lots more good things are coming
your way
Hello, and welcome to food Stuff. I'm Any and I'm
Lauren Vogelbaum and Odd's time for another fictional foods episode.
Yeah it's been a minute, but we are here today
to talk about fictional foods. Hitchhiker's Guy to the Galaxy edition. Yes, yeah, oh,
and we've we've also got a special treat for you
guys today. At the end of the episode, a listener
(00:30):
sent in some trivia, some fictional food trivia. Yeah, all right,
I believe I am a fan, and I believe Lauren
that you are a fan as well. I am very
much a fan. It was one of those I got
a hold of a copy of I think the Whole trilogy,
which is five books, um in early high school, and
(00:51):
it was one of those revolutionary things for me, Like
it was just total paradigm shift. I was like, oh, oh,
this is so good. I think I had the same copy,
and I let someone borrow it. If you're listening, I
want it back. I can't remember who you are, but
(01:12):
I will find you. I lost my copy as I was,
because I meant to reread at least the first book
when I was when when when we decided to do
this episode and I it's it's not there. It's probably
the same person. That person just collecting coffees on top
(01:32):
of coffees for what purpose. We don't know. Well, one
day we'll figure it out. But I wanted to start
with my favorite quote, which I do remember. I think
it's from the restaurant at the end of the universe.
He's spending a year dead for tax reasons. I just
remember that because I like read that and I was
(01:53):
what eleven So I don't know anything about taxes. I
don't have to pay taxes, but for some reason, it's
as my mom said, overturned my ticklebox and I just
kept laughing and laughing and laughing. It's such a really,
it's a really clear memory for me, apparently. Yeah. Yeah,
(02:13):
And we have mentioned Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy before
in a couple of past episodes like um Gin and
Tonics to mind. Yeah, and as per the used with
these fictional food episodes. Thanks to Wikia fandom. So helpful,
so helpful. Oh yes, yes, hats off to you all, brave,
(02:36):
brave soldiers a fandom. Yes, we appreciate your efforts. So
what is it? The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is
a comedic media series almost entirely written by earth human
Douglas Adams. It started as a BBC radio show in
nine and was adapted into a while popular series of novels,
(03:01):
plus stage shows, video games, a television series in one,
a feature film in two thousand five, and more other
radio shows. That's a lot it is. Douglas Noel Adams
was a writer who was rather famous for not writing, Um,
I love deadlines, he wrote, I like the whooshing sound
they make as they fly by. He was born in Cambridge, England,
(03:25):
in nineteen fifty two. His uh father, a teacher, and
his mother, a nurse, divorced when he was five. He
was a fan of Monty Python and he decided to
try to get into writing comedy. Took a whole lot
of odd jobs while he was doing it, and Uh
the Chhiker's Guide radio show was an unexpectedly resounding hit
that moved him into writing full time. The novels almost
(03:48):
didn't happen because the BBC was like, oh, novel adaptations
of radio series never worked, let's not even try. That's fools.
But happened. They did. Also all of those other things
and although Adams would struggle with depression and writer's block
and and kind of the weight of that early success.
(04:10):
He'd go on to to do work, a work in
writing that helped protect endangered species. He married, he had
a daughter, he've had a ridiculous collection of electric guitars. Um,
and he would die suddenly in two thousand one when
he was just forty nine. UM. And every year on
fans and friends celebrate his strange life and legacy with
(04:31):
Towel Day day on which to openly carry a towel
with you, because, as The Hitchiker's Guide taught us, a
towel is one of the most useful objects in the universe,
and you should never go anywhere with that one. I
actually have. It's a yellow one, and it's one of
those ones that gets like super small, and it is
really absorbant and tries really quickly, you know, just in
(04:52):
case it's good, it's you know, it could be a food.
Who really knows where your towel is? This is true. Uh,
if if you have rather no idea what we're talking about,
and I'm I'm so sorry if I drop more British
isms than usual into this particular episode. It's thinking about it.
His my brain in a very English place right now.
(05:13):
The eponymous Hitchhiker's Guide is this a galactic travel guide?
And the media series are about the adventures or misadventures
of another Earth human by the name of Arthur Dent,
traveling galactically. Uh. And despite this, the series are way
more about the hilariously mundane things in life than they
are about science fiction e things. Uh. Adams actually said
(05:36):
that he never intended the series to be science fiction,
but that he blew up the Earth in the first
episode spoiler alert, and he sort of had to. Yeah,
sort of difficult not to go elsewhere if the planet
no longer exists. Yes, uh So one of those hilariously
mundane things about life, the universe and everything is food
(05:59):
and drink. So there's a lot of that in the series. Um.
A lot of the series are actually just about Arthur
trying and failing to get a decent cup of tea. Yeah,
which we talked about a little bit in our episode. Yeah. Yeah,
And I have I have a have a quote for you.
Stop me at any time. I'll just go on forever
(06:20):
on the the first spaceship that that Arthur. I guess
it's the second spaceship, isn't it that Arthur winds up
on I Know how dare I? Um It says he
had found a new traumatic machine which had provided him
with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost,
but not quite entirely unlike tea. The way it functioned
(06:41):
was very interesting. When the drink button was pressed, it
made an instant but highly detailed examination of the subjects
taste buds, a spectroscopic analysis of the subject's metabolism, and
then sent tiny experimental signals down the neural pathways to
the taste centers of the subject's brain to see exactly
what was likely to go down. Well, however, no one
knew quite why it did this, because it invariably delivered
(07:01):
a cup full of liquid that was almost, but not
quite entirely unlike tea. That's one of the things I
love about um these books is that it it's there's
all these kind of high tech robot and it's trying
to understand humans, and humans just don't make sense. Essentially,
(07:23):
is the joke, Like I've done all this math and
calculations but nothing is working, or just yeah, beings, like
living beings at their core, are completely nonsensical. Yeah yeah, um.
Book menus dot com has a breakdown of the most
mentioned food and drinks. Because there are, like teeth, a
(07:44):
lot of things from Earth show up in the series
a lot. They're just usually viewed differently, and we will
talk a little bit about that more later. But te peanuts,
corn flakes, McDonald's, hamburger, jello, don't it's very important, custard,
hot dogs, and rice pudding. Um. And if you're interested,
(08:07):
they have a lot more information following all of that.
Take a very long time to go through, but more
power to you if you want to know. Oh, absolutely, yes.
So that's a basic overview. We're gonna pause for a
quick break forward from our sponsor and then get into
some specifics and we're back. Thank you sponsored you. So
(08:39):
we have two sections here, foods and drinks, and we're
gonna start with foods, and we're going to start in
that subsection vegan rhino a k A. Evil smelling meat,
and by vegan rhino, is it is it vegan? Is it? Nope?
It's not. What's your thinking? Probably vegan here does not
(09:02):
necessarily mean what it means on Earth. It means from
the Alpha Learius star system, oh like vega like vague
vegan vegan not vegan. Yeah, I get it, it's so Joe.
Speaking of meat, there are also a perfectly normal beasts
which happened to pass through this a particularly superstitious settlement
(09:24):
on a planet called Lamuela. Periodically. Um, when Arthur crash
lands there and is asked why the Almighty Bob sent him, Um,
he sets himself up as the Almighty Bob's sandwich maker.
Oh important job, yeah yeah, um, and his primary ingredient
for these sandwiches is perfectly normal beast. For upon Lammuela,
(09:45):
every aspect of making the humble sandwich has been developed
beyond the dreams of even the picnic food epicures on
Thermos Magnus ex Mm hmm sounds good. Yeah sure. In
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, which is
a book about a fictional restaurant within that book, they
(10:07):
serve scentiate and suicidal meat, self serving you see. Yeah. Yeah,
it's explained as being the most humane choice, you know,
Rather than get tangled up in whether it's okay to
eat regular animals and plants which cannot consent um, someone
bred a type of cow that actively wants to be eaten?
What a life? Were good evening, Madame and gentlemen, I
(10:35):
am the main dish of the day. May I interest
you in parts of my body? Huh? Well, something off
my shoulder, perhaps raised in a little white wine sash.
There's the hagro biscuit, and this is a dntra se specialty,
a lower quality food stuff that they served to the Bogans,
(10:58):
whom they detested. The Tracy were known for having really
nice food, but they made pure crap for the Wogans.
So anyone expecting nice and trassy food but got something
they made with the Wogans in mind was going to
be disgusted and surprised. Um. And I'm not sure what
this is that the Internet will return a result of
(11:20):
a blue bread topped with guacamole. Well, that's what it
looks like. I have no idea what's actually going on.
It's a bright blue bread dot with something bright green
fill in as you imagine, imagine agencies fit. Um. There's
star Bicks, which is a cereal brand Algoleian zilot burger,
(11:41):
which Zafa biebl Brocks described as quote a kind of
meat burger made with the most unpleasant parts of a
creature well known for its total lack of any pleasant
part that sounds appetizing, and as we mentioned earlier, earth food.
Several Earth foods show up throughout this series, but in
different ways than we would expect. For instance, beer is
(12:06):
used as a muscle relaxant, although I would say you
could argue some of us use it that way absolutely.
Oh yeah, yeah. Peanuts are sort of protein supplement, uh
and t tea can power alien and probability machines quote
the principle of generating small amounts of finite improbability by
(12:27):
simply hooking the logic circuits of a bimboolweeny fifties seven
submission brain to an atomic vector plotter suspended in a
strong Brewnian motion. Producer say a nice hot cup of tea, where,
of course well understood. Of course, when human Arthur Dent
(12:47):
confused computers by asking for tea, they asked him why,
and his response was it makes me happy. Oh yeah,
that's kind of nice, Poor Arthur. Yeah, poor Arthur. Coffee,
on the other hand, um and specifically stirring it has
sort of a butterfly effect on bistro mathematics. Yes, bistro
(13:09):
mathematics is an understanding of numbers that accepts that numbers
are not absolute but dependent on the movement of the
observer in restaurants. Yes, uh quote. Just as Einstein observed
that time was not an absolute but depended on the
observer's movement in space, and that space was not an
absolute but dependent on the observer's movement in time, it
(13:31):
is now realized that numbers are not absolute but dependent
on the observer's movement in restaurants. Yeah I love this,
uh so yeah so so, Like the number of people
a table is reserved for versus the number of people
who wind up eating um, and the time that the
party is supposed to arrive versus when they actually do,
(13:52):
and the build amount versus how much anyone who's showed
up is prepared to pay, and whether or not they
have money with them um. The work of calculating all
of these non absolute numbers can can allow you to
manipulate the very fabric of reality. Is what's going on
in bastro mathematics. There's a ship that has a beast
(14:13):
mathematics engine. The engine is made up of a robotic restaurant,
the servers and all the all the bits and pieces
are all robotic and uh, it's what it's doing is
actively calculating all of these numbers, these these non absolute numbers,
these numbers, some of which are rest of private exclusions,
(14:34):
which are numbers whose existence can only be defined as
being anything other than themselves, like time of a arrival
exactly my favorite one. So uh so so yeah, so yeah,
I'm trying trying to to to solve these equations. Can
get can get you far? I think, isn't it like
(14:56):
the most powerful something of pairs science. It's very powerful.
It is it is and it's and it's a little
bit less sticky than improbability, uh, mathematics, which is what
drives another engine involved in the series. There's a lot
of engines driven around there. Absolutely. So that's ah the
(15:20):
food overlook. But really we got to talk about some drinks. Yes, yes, okay,
First we're gonna fause for a quick break for a
word from our sponsor and we're back. Thank you sponsor, Yes,
(15:45):
thank you. All right, So the first thing we have
to talk about is Jenks spirit at old Jenks Spirit. Yes,
I think that is what it's more usually called um
and this is a spirit people drink it for the
same multitude of reasons we do, but it's way stronger
(16:07):
than most of the stuff we earthlings are familiar with.
And there are several interesting drinking games involving jank spirit,
mostly played in hyperspace sports in the Orion Beta Star system.
Here are the rules of one of them. Two people
sit across from each other at a table, glass placed
(16:28):
in front of both in a bottle of jank spirit
in the center of the table, and then both contestants
maybe fools, would sort of use the force they had
telepsychic powers and attempt to tip the bottle so that
it would pour some of the spirit into the glass
of their opponent, who would then have to check it,
(16:50):
rent and repeat, bottle after bottle. Yeah, sort of like
beer pong or Burea burea kart, but worse a lossment.
You'd probably keep losing because the alcohol, I mean, it
messes with a lot of things, but it also messes
with the telepsychic powers. Yeah. Once whatever predetermined amount of
(17:12):
jank spirit was consumed and a final winner emerged, the
loser had to perform a forfeit, which was typically an
obscene biological thing. Old jank spirit has appeared in a
couple of Star Wars properties, including the Force Unleashed two
novel and other things. And there's a drinking song there is.
(17:35):
I've been debating all day whether I was gonna sing
this or I was just gonna say it. Oh, don't
give me none more of that old Jank spirit. Now,
don't give me none more of that old Jank spirit.
For my head will fly, my tongue will lie, my
eyes will fry, and I may die. Won't you pour
me one more of that sinful old Jenks spirit. So
(17:56):
rousing tune, I'm sure. And speaking of something else, you
probably shouldn't drink pan Galactic goggle blasters. These were invented
by the characters apod Um, and they are Jenks Spirit
cocktail with one of the most explicit descriptions in the
books when it comes to food or drink item quote.
(18:19):
Take the juice from one bottle of that old Jenk spirit,
poured into one measure of water from the seas of
satire Genius five. Allow three cubes of octurin megagen megagen
to melt into the mixture. It must be properly iced
or the benzene is lost. Allow four leaders of Folly
(18:39):
and marsh gas to bubble through it over the back
of a silver spoon, floort a measure of qualactin hypermint
extract dropping the tooth of an Algolian sun tiger. Sprinkle
zam four adding olive. Drink but very carefully. There's a
(18:59):
lot of periods in there. Ellipses yes, and you should
drink it very very carefully. Is compared to quote the
alcoholic equivalent of a mugging expensive and bad for the head.
And it's like having your brain smashed out by a
slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick. Another
(19:22):
description of its potency is as follows. After two of
those babies, the dullest most by the book, Vogan will
be up on the barn stilettos, yodeling mountain shanties and
swearing he's the king of the gray binding fiefdoms of Saxoquin.
There's a lot of fun words in here. It's Inventor
(19:42):
himself advises never drink more than two pan galactic gargo
blasters unless you are a thirty ton mega elephant with
bronchial pneumonia. Who There are places you can go in
the book to rehabilitate yourself after having one one of these,
and the TV show a drop of the liquid burned
(20:03):
a hole in the floor. But despite all of this,
it carries the label the best drink in existence. You know,
it's certainly something to remember if only you could. And so,
of course, tantalized as as humans are by descriptions of
(20:25):
this sort, many people have made real life versions. Yeah.
The you can find some at the Zaffa People Blox
Bar in Ottawa, Ontario, so cool. Are the Daniel Bar
Findomond in Paris, which was also cool. I've never been
any of these places, but I've delved into their websites
(20:48):
or Wisconsin's forty two Lounge. Forty two. Yeah, yeah, it's
an important number. It is. When asked about the recipe
for the pan galactic gargo Blaster Bils Adams, the author responded, Unfortunately,
there are a number of environmental and weapons treatises, Treats
(21:08):
and Weapons Treatise and laws of physics which prevent one
being mixed on Earth. Sorry, but of course there are
real world recipes that you can find online, and one
I found from tour dot Com is as follows. One
ounce are more of absence or pestis which is sort
(21:30):
of a nearer absente um. One ounce of brandy, four
ounces chilled club soda, one teaspoon cardamom infused honey, various
oddities to garnish, and then he has a recipe on
how to make the cardamon honey. So you know, if
you're looking to try some yourself or drow a Hitchhiker's
(21:53):
Guide to the Galaxy themed party, invite us and make this. Yeah. Yeah,
I think it's basically a Tom Collins basically with with
like yeah, like like maybe something a little bit absently flavored, yeah, tustin,
a little bit of color, yeah, garnish with an olive
and speaking of um, of course the gin Anthony, which
(22:16):
I think is supposed to be Gin and the Tom Knicks,
the Gagrocaca version of Gin and Tonics, essentially only again
way stronger. That's that's a theme in this, this whole thing.
I've realized it's strong enough to kill a cow at
one hundred paces. That's a serious, serious drink. I mean,
(22:41):
all drinking is serious. Drink responsibly, yes, especially any pangalactic
charco plasters should you run across? Oh yeah, man, if
staff had ever hands you a drink, drink extremely responsibly,
by which I probably mean not at all. Yeah, yeah,
definitely do the old toss over your shoulder things. But
(23:03):
that's that brings us to the end of this our
fictional foods edition of Hit Checker's Guide of the Galaxy. Yeah, yeah,
there's you know, there's there's lots lots more in there,
and lots lots and in different different iterations of the series.
If we missed your favorite, write and listen let us
know what it is. Yeah, and if you have any recipes,
(23:23):
I mean, we'll be very impressed and very thrilled. Oh yeah, yes, always.
And speaking of sending things our away, it's time for
like being being up. Yes, everyone got that up? Sure,
(23:45):
I'm positive, Okay, Lucy wrote, I just listened to your
cod episode and was interested in the facts about cod
in Iceland as I was just there, and while I
was there, I had some of the best fish in
my life. Though I'm not positive it was cod, I
thought you guys might still find it interesting. The first
dish I had was at a restaurant that made traditional
(24:07):
Icelandic food. It was called the Fisherman's Platter, and it
was simply fish, potatoes and butter. Smashed up into a
plate of delicious. The second dish was simply fish and chips,
presumably made from cod. As you said, it is the
main fish used in this meal. It seems a bit odd.
The best fish and chips I ever had was an Iceland,
but to be fair, I've never been to England. The
(24:29):
fish was crispy and the fries were really well made.
The highlight though, was the sauce. It was like nothing
I had ever had. It was creamy and spicy and
almost soy ey. If you ever end up in Rakovic,
try to find some fish and chips. Yes, yes, I've
never been to Iceland, but I yes, I was there
(24:49):
for like one day, so you know, count um but
are one of the producers here, Paul. He spent two
weeks there recently and he was telling me about how
amazing all the fish was. Oh, I'm sure it's my list,
Janna wrote, just wanted to drop you up line regarding
the cod episode. I loved it because I'm from Newfoundland.
(25:11):
By the way, it's pronounced new found Land rhyming with
understand Uh, don't worry, I'd say about Americans and of
Canadians get it wrong. I think I just got it
wrong too. Uh. I was also born when the cod
moratorium was started. I don't remember it personally, but I
can remember from a very young age people talking about it.
(25:33):
I grew up in a small fishing village, and most
people's parents that I knew when I was little, we're
going back to school to retrain for some sort of
other job. Most people in our town were quite poor
in this time, and fisherman and others all had to
band together. Families all moved into one house to save
money on things like childcare, heat, light, et cetera. My
aunt and uncle lived with us until I was ten. Myself,
(25:54):
I was rather lucky as my mom is a nurse,
so had full time work outside of fishing and allowed
my dad to reach rain in construction. I can remember
also many old men, such as my grandfather, who fished
by handline for their whole lives. Most of them just retired.
They told stories of rowing out their dories in the morning,
filling their boats by hand when fishing cod was totally illegal.
(26:14):
The old men would sit on the docks and look
out at the water like their worlds had ended. It
was all they knew. The work was hard, but enjoyable.
They've brought back fishing now for recreational purposes. They did
it when I was about twelve or so. My grandfather
cried when you got to take me out in the
boat and I caught my first fish. Now we can
fish five fish per person per day for most weekends
in the summer. It's something people do for sport and
(26:35):
as a tourist attraction, though most of us get to
fill our freezers every year. Anyway, I just wanted to
tell you my personal cod story. I hope it was
interesting and informative on how this one fish effects so
many lives. Oh, absolutely, thank you, thank you for writing
writing in with that and newfound Land I should I
don't know. I feel like Captain Kirk saying it that way.
(26:58):
We're all working on Willias shut or impressions. We are stuff,
we really are. Um. Little progress has been made, but
we will continue to improve. Absolutely. And this brings us
to the aforementioned trivia trivia. Who doesn't love trivia? And
this was sent to us four ever ago, yes by
(27:21):
by by a kind listener by the name of Dina
are Dinah. I'm not sure how to pronounce it, but yes,
it was. I think she sent this when we did
our Pumpkin episode. Oh wow, that was forever a go.
So we've been hanging on to it and trying to
think of the best way to do it. But we're
going to do We're gonna read the questions off and
(27:42):
then you listeners write down your answers keep them up
in the brain. I'm not going to tell you what
to do, but in an upcoming episode we will reveal
the answers. Yes, yes, alright, So are you ready, Lauren?
I'm ready? Are you ready? Annie? I think so? Okay,
(28:03):
here we go. Number one. In this book or movie,
you can have a chewing gum meal, busy lifting drinks,
and taste of real snosberries. Question two. Dr Seuss wrote
this book on a bet that he couldn't write a
book with fifty or fewer distinct words. Number three. You'll
(28:27):
have to go to this fictional town to have a
bag of cheesy poofs or enjoy some chocolate salty balls.
Question four. When Mystery Inc. Needs to bribe their great Dane,
they use this Question five. And this TV show, the
lead character is a cook and fan of crabby patties.
(28:50):
Question six. Though you can't understand their words. These creatures
exist solely on Tubby Custard and Tubby Toast. In this show,
you can get deaf bear, eat tomacos, try to enjoy
a krusty burger, and get a flaming mo. Questionnate. This
is an old folk story in which hungry strangers convince
(29:13):
people of a town to each share a small amount
of their food in order to make a stew from
an inedible object. Question nine. This comic strip's main character
loves chocolate frosted sugar bombs. Quote their crunchy on the outside,
chewy on the inside, and they don't have a single
natural ingredient or essential vitamin to get in the way
(29:33):
of that rich fudgie taste. Question ten. On this TV show,
we learned that vitam meat of vegamin contains trace amounts
of alcohol. Number eleven. On this show, while Liz Lemon
eats cheesy blasters a Jack cheese stuffed hot dog folded
in a pizza, while her boss, Jack Donegie eats two
(29:53):
Heitian vanilla bean ice cream in a pool of cognac
drizzled in the world's most expensive chocolate Amada porcellana covered
with shaved white black and clear truffles and topped with
edible twenty five carried gold leaf. And question twelve our
final question. In this movie, characters have a big Kahuna
(30:13):
burger with a five dollar shake and discuss a food
fictional in America, arroyal with cheese. Yes. Um, those are
the questions. There are tiebreakers, oh yes, yes, which will
just will just include here. I don't know how we
would break an actual tie. Also, there's no technical prize
here other than bragging rights. Oh yes, bragg to everyone.
(30:37):
They'll be very impressed. All right, here are the tiebreakers. So, um,
the goal is to identify the movie or show based
on the fictional food. And there's three. There's three, all right,
number one milk plus number two cornballers number three stay
puffed marshmallows. All right, listeners, I hope you came up
(31:01):
with a team name. We didn't tell you to do that,
but do that now if you didn't, even if it's
just you team of yeah, you're still a team. There
is an I in team. There is it's if you
add a line to the t there you go. Can't
see it, but it's there. So stay tuned for the
(31:24):
answers and feel free to to send your your responses
before then if you want to be legit legit about it,
oh yeah, yeah, no no cheating, yes, put your phones
away or you know, yeah, just don't cheat right. If
you would like to email us, you can. Our email
is food stuff at how stuff works dot com. We're
(31:46):
also on social media. You can find us on Twitter
and Facebook at food Stuff. Hs W stands for how
Stuff Works. We're also on Instagram at food Stuff. We
hope to hear from you. Thank you as always to
our superproducer Dylan Fagan. Thank you to you for listening,
and we hope that lots more good things are coming
your way
Savor News
Hosts And Creators
Anney Reese
Lauren Vogelbaum
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