November 5, 2025 • 32 mins
Joey returns to wrap up our conversation on New York Comic Con and conventions, especially on progress and areas that need work.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hey, this is Anny, and welcome to Steffan never told
your production of iHeart Radio. And yes, I am still
without Samantha, but I am joined today by a friend
(00:25):
of the show, friend in real life contributor Joey, who
has been with us several times, who is a good
nerd friend of mine, so much so that this episode
ballooned into two parts and we kept talking for about
an hour after it was over. But yes, we are
back with part two of our conversation with Joey about
(00:48):
New York Comic Con and fandom in general.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Go check out part one.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
If you haven't, as hinted at as discussed in that episode,
really need Samantha Torain is in because yeah, she was
outsick and we just had so much to say and
we kept going indeed after the mic was off. But
there's just so much that is going on with the
(01:15):
mainstreaming of fandom to talk about, and in fact, we
came up with several other episode ideas doing this, So
this was a surprise two parter. And so I just
want to put in the reminder here we are going
to be talking about sexual assault and harassment in this part,
(01:37):
not in detail, but that is where we're picking up
with the conversation today, so let's get back into our discussion.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
Last thing, I want to just discuss a little bit,
which this is what I was going out at the
top right. I said, it's touched a little bit on
sexual assault harassment. This kind of came top of mind
again because we did a story for There Aren't No
Girls on the Internet, which is another show that I
work on with Bridget High. Last week we did a
story about this increased problem with like sexual harassment and
assault at twitch Con, which was a.
Speaker 4 (02:09):
Couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
I think it was actually the week after Comic Con
in San Diego, and there was this really horrifying story
about this one particular creator who I guess Before the
convention there were a lot of concerns about assault and
about harassment in the way that a lot of streamers,
particularly female streamers, were treated. There was this one streamer
who had like a man like came on stage and
(02:31):
like physically assaulted her, and then what like she was
also facing some like harassment.
Speaker 4 (02:39):
There were all of these issues.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
It was like something to where this guy had been
a consistent problem. She had a bodyguard who usually was
with her and the bodyguard for some reason was well
not for some reason, he I guess had intervened with
another attack the previous twitch Con, and for some they
decided the course of action would be to ban the
bodyguard as as opposed to banning the guy that assaulted her,
(03:03):
which makes so much sense. And this brings up, you know,
another conversation about like parasocial relationships, particularly when it comes
to like these kind of streamers and creators and particularly
you know, women, and how that's dangerous. But it also
makes me think about again, like just your average Joe
cosplayer like me, if you're somebody who is at something
(03:23):
like hom Con, who you're like me, where you're you're
not like I don't have a bodyguard with me. I
you know, personally, I've been very lucky where like I've
never really had anything like really terrible happen. That being said,
I saw at the top of this episode this is
my first year where I dressed up as a female character,
which was interesting. Uh again, nothing too terrible. I think
(03:48):
like a couple of Evelli comments that I was sort
of like, oh interesting, I did have a man and
this I wouldn't qualify this as harassment or was a
man who was like very trying to flirt with me
unsuccessfully and then offered to my majoring sort of unprompted,
and I was sort of like, this is weird. I
didn't even start talking to you. I don't know why. Again,
I don't think that's harassed, but I think that's just
(04:08):
people being awkward. But I was sort of like, huh,
I'm not used to like having to deal with this.
I've talked to a lot of friends about this, particularly again,
like I usually dress bore masculine when I'm at these things.
Friends that think particularly that dress very feminine or like
more fem It's an issue every year, like there's always
something that happens. There's always it's usually just like comments,
(04:29):
you know, you're like getting shoved or like maybe.
Speaker 4 (04:33):
Some groping, like god forbid.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
But yeah, there's like something every year that's like weird
and uncomfortable.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
So it's like, like.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Going into this experience, I sort of like, I know
I have to be wary of like men being weird,
but yeah, I think hearing like that story from TwitchCon
and hearing like how much of backlash there was a
twitch Con this year, and the fact that it sounds
like there's a lot of female streamers that are now
pulling out because of what happened and because of it
not being taken seriously. It just makes me think about
(05:01):
the fact that, yeah, again, like what happens to the
rest of us that are dealing with this. I had
a friend say something at one point we were talking
and he was just like, yeah, you can tell fascisms
on the ride this rise this year, because the audacity
of men is like gone way up, and like he
was talking about the fact that we're like he got
shoved a bunch and like people were just like pushing
out of the way, and I was like, yeah, there's that.
And then also like every single girl that I've talked
(05:23):
to that I'm here with like has had somebody made
it some comment about a costume or about our body
or whatever.
Speaker 4 (05:28):
I had the first day when I.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Was dressed a wick in because I thought costume is
like a like skin tight bodysuit. This wasn't in the convention,
but I was at a cafe like across the street,
and like there was a man that was there that
was like very obviously like checking me out. I was
sort of like, this is weird. And uncomfortable. I moved
out of the way and he like followed me, and
I was like great, I'm not even surprised about this happening,
Like I knew this was going to happen at some point,
(05:50):
but yeah, it's annoying and uncomfortable.
Speaker 4 (05:52):
I think, well, my friend's life.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Was right where. I think there is some culture shift happening.
I think this is a reflection of it. It seems to
be worse this year. I haven't seen any reporting about
like the like numbers or incidents anything this year. I'm
interested to see, like what comes out of it, if
any like incidents did occur. But yeah, I don't know
what the solution is. I wish I did, but I
think there needs to be some sort of shift, whether
(06:16):
it's from the guests and the people there and the
culture there, or like from the convention team itself. I think, again,
this is like what I was talking about with the
way the space is organized. I think there's a lot
of issues that the actual like if if they want
to make this a good experience for people, if they
want this to be a thing that people want to
come back to, there are things that need to be fixed.
(06:39):
I'm still probably gonna go next year. I overhall had
a great time. I had a really fun time. There's
a lot of things I love about comic Con. I
love the people there. I love like getting to interact
with people. I love getting to meet new people again.
Like ninety nine percent of the interactions I have were
great and amazing and super fun.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
But there were a number of things.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
This time I think just showed that there are changes
that need to be made and I want them to
do better. Otherwise I'm worried about this event like being
able to happen in the next couple of years, you know.
So Yeah, not to end on a rough note, but
those are my takeaways this year. Again, that being said,
I did have a great time again. It's always fun
(07:22):
to dress up. It's always fun to just hang out
with friends and bond over all of our like nerdy
things that were into.
Speaker 4 (07:31):
I was really proud of myself.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
I bought a couple of things this year, but I
didn't spend too much money.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
So you know that was a win.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Nice, Yeah, I mean again, I you and I think
could talk forever and ever about this stuff. I feel
like in my experience, I too have seen that because
I started going to dragon Con, and I don't know,
like two thousand and eight a long time. I've been
going for a while, and back then it was pretty big,
(08:02):
but it was much smaller than it is now it is.
It's I think they said, like ninety thousand people came
this year.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Oh wow, yeah, and so there's have gone up a lot,
like born.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
So I think it's interesting that we're seeing this more
widespread embrace of nerd to nerd culture cause playing, although I.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Think some people take it way too seriously.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
And that's mostly men. That's most men.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
I'm like, guess what, you aren't actually the Mandalorian.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
I'm sorry, you know, I will say I feel like
there has at least been a decline in the Deadpool
cause players, because that was always that. They're always was huge,
a group, a like smattering of men dressed as Deadpool
that thought they were so funny and would just harass people.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
I've seen less of that, So, you.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Know what, maybe maybe it's now they're all the Mandalorian
and they're Stoyac and they yeah, I don't mess with me,
and so I don't know, I don't know, maybe that's
another cultural shift.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
To Dragon Con has a we have the big parade,
and we have the five oh first from Star Wars,
like you have to get in, and then we have
another one that is like, oh god, three hundred that
movie The Gladiators.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
And you have to like show your apps and like
get in.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
And I'm assuming workout all the time, and I'm just
like this is too much, my dudes. But this year
a friend asked me because I had a friend who'd
never been and I was kind of showing around and
she's like, to do any women to it? And I
was like, you know, I've never really seen it.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
They do. There's a huge section of it this year.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
And it's like I feel like we're getting some winds
and some we're getting some pushbacks.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
I don't know, Yeah, I don't know. It is the
weird thing where I was like I'm like yeah, like
I'm again like I came to like I remember being
a kid and being like a lot of this stuff
was like for the boys, it wasn't for the girls.
And now I feel like there is much more of
a like gender bound. It is like seen as for everybody.
(10:13):
There's like even I personally, like I was my little
sister is really into like all the like romanticy books
and whatever.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
I'm not, but you.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
Know what, I respect that for people that are into it.
There was like a fair amount of people that were
cause playing stuff from that, and I was like, yeah,
like stuff that's like more quote unquote female centric media too,
Like it does seem like there's more it's open, Like
there's more media that is kind of under this umbrella.
It is more open to like yeah, there's a lot
more things that are aimed like a sort of geared
(10:44):
towards queer people. They are geared towards people that aren't
just like straight white men. But yeah, but there always
is going to be this problem, like it is still
then I go into this thing too, and I'm always like, okay,
there's going to be some creepy man who makes some
strange comment at either me or at one of my friends,
and like, I don't know, it is yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Well one of the things one of the big pushes
at Dragon Con a couple of years ago was which
I used to not do this either, so I'm glad
it was a big push, but like you know, asking consent,
like before you take the picture, yeah, just like checking,
And so that became a really big thing. But one year,
when I was dressed as a winter soldier, a guy
was dressed as Captain America came up to me was like,
can I take a picture? And I said yes, And
(11:39):
the next thing I know, he just picked me up
in his arms and was like, I want you to
act like you're dead, and I was like, this has gone.
I don't know what kind of fantasy I helped you
live out.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
I don't know what this is.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
But he took the picture and they put me down
and left, and I was like that, I don't know
if I didn't really consent to that right I have
if you told me.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
I feel if you should ask, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
I come about this is very like I'm like I'll
ask people if I like to take their picture. I
feel like that's commons courtesy. I am like, if somebody's
saying a picture with me, if I'll be like yeah,
because it's so cool, if I like put my arm
around you or something like just I don't know. I
feel like it's like just it's common courtesy, Like it's
just being like, hey, is this okay. I don't want
to do anything that's going to be like uncomfortable for you.
I would hate if somebody put me in that position.
(12:28):
But yeah, I don't know, I don't know what is.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
Up with like some of Yeah, I was.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
I remember like a year I was talking to one
of my friends who I'm gonna be big because I
don't want to out her at all for any of them,
but if and she like she CAUs likes a female
DC character who is like very popular. She was like,
I just I don't think I can causeplay this character anymore,
like at conventions, just because like the amount of men
that come up to me and like make weird comments,
(12:55):
like unprompted, because like they're they're trying to I fel filled.
They're like fantasy where she was just like and I'm like,
I'm just here like to I'm in a little superhero costume.
Like it's not not that it would matter because it
but it's like not even a particularly like revealing one.
It's like a very just standard like superhero suit. I
(13:18):
don't know with the King and like again, it doesn't matter.
You could be wearing like you could be dressed as
anything and you would still have his comments and it
would not be okay. Uh but yeah, it is like
it's frustrating to like, like, I felt really sad for her,
where I was like, I know, this is like one
of your favorite characters.
Speaker 4 (13:34):
You like you, I've worked really hard on this costume.
Speaker 3 (13:38):
I've seen you cosplay this character for like years, and
it's so sad to hear you be like, I don't
think I can do this anymore in public just because
of the amount of comments that I get that are
so uncomfortable to deal with.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Yeah, And that's the I mean, it is really sad
because for people like like us, that love is that
you get excited about it.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
You're thinking about it, what am I gonna wear?
Speaker 1 (13:59):
When I'm gonna do And it can be I also
generally have really good interactions and it can be really
fun when someone comes up to you and does like
I used to get the Winter Soldier code words all
the time people I start saying yeah, yeah, which you
know if I didn't know them.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
I don't think I should be judged for not knowing them.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
But it was kind of funny, Like it was a
fun little interaction I would have. So most of it
has been I also have been very lucky where most
of it has been really pleasant, but it is a thing,
like I used to The number one creepy comment I
used to get was you know exactly what you're doing.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
Oh my gosh, I hate that. Yeah, that's the thing.
Even I was thinking about that. But again I said,
like the first day I was wearing that body suit
and I was like out at this cafe across the street,
and I was like, okay, like I guess I'm wearing
something a little bit more revealing, like I'm expecting something
to happen. But I was like, I'm dressed as a superhero.
I'm dressed as a Marvel Comics character. Like, no, I'm
(14:55):
what I'm doing is I'm dressing up.
Speaker 4 (14:57):
Like a comic book character.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
I like, because I'm going to do a comic to
have fun and be a nerd and like, I don't know, Yeah,
it's it's really like it's weird and uncomfortable. I think, like, yeah,
I'll be I'll be realized. There's definitely costumes to you
where ipen like, oh maybe I should do this character
and I'm like, I don't know if I'm really gonna
(15:18):
be like like I don't know. I was like, I
want I would love to like Cosway with Scarlet Witch
at some point, I love her like comic book costume.
I'm also like, do I really want to wear that
in public?
Speaker 4 (15:28):
Or am I?
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Am?
Speaker 4 (15:28):
I gonna be really uncomfortable? Am I gonna have to
deal with which?
Speaker 5 (15:31):
Like?
Speaker 4 (15:31):
And I I shouldn't have to worry about that.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
I should have to worry about that, And it makes
me sad that I'm like all of these creators that
I love to do, these amazing work that we get
this amazing like art are subject to that without like
nobody should have to.
Speaker 4 (15:43):
Deal with that.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
I don't know. Yeah, yeah, like I was saying before,
and like you said too, I do love like I
love when people ask you to take pictures.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
I love that. I love attention. Please thank you. Yes, Yeah,
I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (15:54):
I just feel like there's a very clear line of
like what is acceptable versus what isn't. And it's like, yeah,
you come with me for a picture or a picture
with you, that's fine, Like you if you were grabbing
me in a certain way, that is clearly not okay. Again,
I think it was and it was interesting, particularly being
like my the first time I'm dressing up as a
female character, also happens to be a character that's like
more masculine presenting. Yeah, but like still I was like, yeah,
(16:18):
Like I took a picture of being like like putting
his arm around my waist and I was kind of like, oh, okay,
Like I don't know if that's what I was going for.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
Also like I'm ready to pose with like.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
My fists up and everything, and I was like, oh, cool,
like that, we're not doing that. I guess it's not fun.
It's not fun. And I don't know.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
I just I don't I don't understand.
Speaker 3 (16:37):
I know what they're trying to achieve is we're trying
to be like it's a power thing.
Speaker 4 (16:41):
It's not about But I'm.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
Like, you're like you're just you're just making that annoying
for everybody else.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Yeah, and you're making it like cause again, a lot
of my interactions are very good, I got I think
a lot more people have been very affirming ever since
that whole there's kind of a like that happened at
Dragon Coon a couple of years ago with that you
asked for consent, yeah, yeah, take pictures, and now a
lot of people are very affirm and they're like, you
(17:07):
look fabulous. I usually would just go look, I get
you look fabulous. I don't know who you are. Can
I take a picture? And I'm like, yes, you've made
me feel good. That was a straightforward request, thank you.
Most of them are that, but every now you get
you don't know, you don't know, uh, especially if it's
a good yeah yeah, yeah, I want this to be
(17:32):
a fun time. I hope you're cool, but I don't
know because I've had some bad Again.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
I was talking about like that guy who like I
think he was well intentioned. I don't.
Speaker 4 (17:41):
I wouldn't say this was a craftsman.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
But we were like in line and he like started
talking to me and he like, I don't know where
we started, like oh yeah, can I buy you a drink?
And I was like, I'm it's like late in the day,
I'm tired. I'm just trying to like grab a beer
and go say with my friends for a little bit,
Like I I, this is.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
Not the time and place. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Like I was sort of like like and also same
thing where I was kind of like I don't know
what to expect. You could again, like I use this
could be just well, well intentioned, maybe a bit awkward,
or you could say something weird the minute that I
do something you don't like or whatever or yeah, And
I was kind of like, great, now I have to
(18:21):
be like, oh, like that, it's okay, actually I'm good,
but thank you. I like I have to like talk
you down from all that. Like now it's like an
extra layer of pressure for me, which I don't want
to have to deal with again. I'm just I'm tired,
I'm I'm I just want to go sit with my friends.
I don't want to. It's the point of the day
(18:42):
where we're all in the quarter sitting down, just like, ah, okay,
do you compress, Like.
Speaker 4 (18:46):
I don't want to deal with this.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Well and Dragon Con is interesting too because most people
will not most people, but a lot of people are
staying in the hotels, so you'll get as they do
a lot of hotel room parties. And that's just like
I have never been to one because as a woman.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
I feel like but I've had a friend who has
done it and had a good time, and she's she said,
and I had a I had I met a random
dude that I ended up really becoming friends with and
he invited me one and I think it would have
been okay, but she still don't know. Again, it makes
me sad that it's like these are the considerations.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
I think that's it. I think it's just it makes
me sad because I do again, like I I I
want to I'm somebody that I really want to assume
the best of people. I usually try to go into
situations like being cautious but assuming the best, and like
I think specifically this and I think I think yeah
with with ment to like I've kind of had a
personal reckoning over like the past couple of years where
I've been like, okay, like let's think about like, yes,
(19:51):
obviously I need to be cautious about like men being
weird or being creepy or doing something terrible, but like
I also don't want to just be terrified of interacting
with men period because I'm so afraid of something bad happening.
So it's like having to judge that situation in the moment,
having to be ready to like get out of there.
(20:13):
I mean, I like and luckily like for this kind
of thing, I was going with friends, I was with
people the entire time I was there.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
I was.
Speaker 3 (20:20):
There was a lot of there was a little bit
of like running around trying to find people one of.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
My I had, I had a friend.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
Like literally there were two days straight of the two
muths back and forth texting each other to try and
find each other, and it ended up like the last
hour the convention was open on Sunday, she like called
me and was like, I am standing at the coat rack.
Made me here right now, and I was like okay,
but yeah, No, it was like like I was there
with people I was, I had, I knew like if
something happened, I'll like I'm also kind of a friend
(20:47):
for some people where they know, like I'm not afraid
to yell at somebody if need be. So there's like
a couple of points where I was like, Okay, if
this sends up going I'm right here.
Speaker 4 (20:55):
If this starts going.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Weird, like just give me a signal and I'll go
over and get you out of there. But yeah, it
is it's like it's it's sad to have to be
like what is my safety plan with all of this
where it's like I literally doing like the nerdiest thing
I possibly could be doing.
Speaker 5 (21:11):
I don't know, yeah, yeah, I think overall, as discussed,
there have been a lot of strides, there's been a
lot of progress with that has come sort of a
(21:35):
backslide and now it's so popular, you we're seeing right
other issues.
Speaker 2 (21:38):
But I do think like it's.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
Always every time something we get some progress, things go
there's a backside.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
But I do think there has.
Speaker 3 (21:48):
There's been progress. There definitely has been and I think
saying here where there also was that conversation, I think
probably around the same time as drag Con, we're like
there's always the little Instagram post they'll put out before
com hondever or where they're like remember causeplays not consent,
blah blah blahlah, all these things that they do have,
you know, and again kind of going back to this
this Twitch story, shout out to bridget for I'm reading
(22:11):
entirely from her research.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
For this, so thank you bridget Ton.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
But like I think hearing that and being like this
is like the some of the worst stories I've heard
from this where there were like people it wasn't being
taken seriously, people were not like somebody was physically assaulted
in a mean great situation, and like it sounds like
it was just sort of swept under the rug and
they were like, oh, yeah, we're dealing with it. And
then like the guy was still at other panels for
(22:37):
some reason, like they're they're what it like that hearing
that and being like, so this is the extreme of
things not being taken seriously and what happens and again, yeah,
you're seeing that backlash of all of these female streamers
now pulling out of it and being like, I'm not
gonna if this is how you're going to behave this
is how you're going to treat these problems. I don't
want to be involved, which I think that makes me
nervous to see. Like I think we're at this tipping
(22:57):
point right now, where like we we could backslide real quick.
There's been a little bit, there's been some like trickling
of behavior that's maybe worse than usual, or this could
just be a fluke, and we could continue on this
momentum of like things are getting better, They're gonna get better. Yes,
you cannot do something about every single issue, but like
(23:19):
there's you know, the methods to report these things, or
there are people in place. I mean, I also like
I'll be like I talked to a couple of the
like staff members at some point too, and it sounded
like they all were like exhausted too, which I don't
know if that just there weren't enough people that were
working there or they had two in your responsibility. I
mean like there was a point where I was like
in line to go get like a water or something,
and there was a woman behind me who was like,
(23:39):
oh shit, Like she started like freak handle, but she's
like I need to go back to my shift, and
I was like here, like go in front of me,
like stop in line in front of me like that.
Speaker 4 (23:45):
I totally understand that.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Also, that's awful that like you literally do not have
enough time to get lunch on your lunch break because
of how much we're having to work, which is a
bigger issue too, also about like you know, how ploys
are treated at any sort of convention, like a whole
other conversation. But yeah, it's like like the there's again
there to tipping point. I think we could continue down
(24:09):
this path of like things improving and things getting better
at it being safer for people, or they could backslide
real quick.
Speaker 4 (24:15):
And I really hope that is not what ends up happening.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
I do as well. I do as well again, thank
you so much for being here. I could keep going and.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
This podcast is going to turn into U y comic
con commentary our favorite Star Wars cosplays.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Yes, I would be so down, I would be so
well before we get into that, where can the good
listeners find.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
To Yeah, you can find other other things that I
do again on There Are No Girls on the Internet
with Bridget Todd I. It is a bi weekly show
The Relea Tuesdays and Fridays.
Speaker 4 (25:02):
I mostly work on the Friday episodes.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
If you were interested in hearing that Twitch story that
I was talking about, it was the episode from October
twenty fourth. You can also I work on like a
number of the outspoken shows here at I Heeart so
you can also hear my work on Outlaws with Ys
Madison and also at the Black Bat Bem podcast.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
If you want to find.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Me online, you can find me at patnt Pratt on Instagram.
I guess because it's relevant, I'll plug my TikTok too.
My TikTok is hot topic, Dad, I have not been
using it as much lately, but I don't know. Send
a follow over.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
I don't know, and if you sell Joey in consplay
at Comic Con, you.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Could see by, you could see bike. Yeah, if you
saw me at comic Con, please send me pictures because
I can't even be like, oh, I don't have enough
pictures of me because I did make like my friends
take a bazillion pictures of me and like different poses
and stuff.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
But you know, I can always have more photos of myself.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
You can never have enough photos of yourself, especially in cosplay.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Especially in cosplay.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Yeah, I never get any good photos. It's the saddest thing.
And you know, the like one of those sometimes wonderful
sad thing about being disco Luke Skywalker is no one
knows what it is except like maybe five people, and
so I can't even search a tag.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
But everybody that does know what it is, it's like.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
Best thing they ever.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yeah, but I can't say there's no nothing I could
search other than like usually people that I'm wonder Woman
or the Golden Snitch.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
And this year I got a wrestler. I don't know who.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
It was interesting, but yeah, so I never get any
people take a bunch of pictures. I'm like, I'll never
see that. I'll never see that one.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
Yeah, yeah, that's not I think I always will either
do like a really obscure character or like a very
popular character where I'm like, this is just gonna get buried,
and like I'm sure if I look up like by
Cosplay New York Comics, there were like, yeah, three hundred
other people in that costume. Like I'm not gonna find myself.
I don't know, but yeah, fun stuff stuff please. Yes, Well,
(27:03):
hopefully we'll get to talk more about this soon, and
we are. We're trying to get Joey in on our
final Twilight viewing extravaganza, so hopefully that will happen.
Speaker 4 (27:16):
I will be there, It will happen.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
Yes again, am I somebody who's good at planning things
in advance?
Speaker 4 (27:24):
No, will it happen?
Speaker 3 (27:26):
Probably there's a good chance it's gonna happen, so I
say it will.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
I think we all want it enough that it will
happen in one way or another.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
But I'm so looking forward to that. And thank you
again for being here.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
Of course, anytime, do my Samantha and Prussia next time
for the entire episode?
Speaker 4 (27:47):
How long it takes before.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
We should hear her voice?
Speaker 3 (27:49):
She's got a good like.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Halloween voice, right, now.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Oh no, Samantha, wherever you are, feel better.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Thanks.
Speaker 4 (27:58):
Halloween is rough.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
Yeah, Oh my gosh. I actually got swine flu on
Halloween in college ones and now every Halloween and I
was quarantined, And now every Halloween I eat macaroni and
cheese because that's the first thing I could eat on Halloween,
and I was like, oh my gosh, I can finally
eat again.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
Anyway, it was I like the year that swine flu
there was like the swine flu epidemic. Yeah, because I
think I also, I don't think it was on Halloween,
but I had swine flu like during the fall that year.
Speaker 4 (28:30):
I was in elementary school at the time.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
But.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Well I was in college.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
That was the time. That was the time I forgot
I Sometimes I'm like, oh, oh yeah, there was like
a whole other that happened.
Speaker 6 (28:45):
But it was yeah, because I remember the moment being like,
how this is crazy that I got this this illness.
This is like I'm part of a cultural moment. And
then of course COVID had to Like COVID came in.
It was like, oh, that was a funny little quarantine
you had. Then let's look at this one.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Oh my gosh, Anyway, I hope every all your listeners
are well.
Speaker 2 (29:08):
This house.
Speaker 4 (29:09):
Yeah, yeah, I hope.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
Nobody is sick. I'm so sorry. It's rely is the
worst time to I always get sick the weekend after Halloween,
but like that's the I'm hoping it'll hold off until then.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
This year, we'll see, you know, Jack and Con has
what we call the kon crud.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
The con crud. Yeah, yeah, we got that two. I didn't.
I somehow didn't get it this year, knock on one.
I don't know how, but I did have a friend
who like had made a TikTok about it and was like,
I'm like, I'm waiting until I get sick. And then
the next day I got sick. So I'm like, I'm
just I'm just not saying anything. I'm not gonna jinx it.
I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
No.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
Yeah again, I've somehow once again, this is my month
of being out in public and costumes almost every weekend,
every weekend, not almost every weekend every weekend. So knock
on one, my immune system will will hold up at
least next four days.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
But we'll see. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:04):
I used to think it's because a lot of the
characters that cosplayed had clubs and a mask, and maybe
that's why.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
I didn't get it.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Well that's what I was I was excited to do
when I told her this year, because I was like,
I can just mask and not Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I don't know if there's any truth to that at all,
but let's say, who is to say, alright, alright, well, yes,
happy Halloween, Happy Halloween. I know it's already happened by
the time you listen to this, but hopefully it's good.
Speaker 4 (30:32):
It could still be Halloween.
Speaker 3 (30:34):
I have a lot of people who.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
Are doing next weekend, the weekend after Halloween.
Speaker 3 (30:37):
There's this one guy on TikTok that I always see.
He's very funny, but he made a video being like,
why Halloween is one day this year? Should I shouldn't
be happy to go to Halloween parties on November first?
Screw that. I want to go to Halloween parties like
through Thanksgiving, all of the Halloween parties. I don't who
who wants there to be less Halloween parties. I was
(30:58):
so excited that Halloween's a Friday this year, so I
have like, yeah, November, I am going to a November
first Halloween party, and I'm very excited about it. Let's
go open that weekend as well. You know exactly you
want there to be less Halloween.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
What's there to be less Halloween?
Speaker 2 (31:14):
Not me?
Speaker 3 (31:14):
By holiday?
Speaker 2 (31:15):
It is agreed, hard agree. Perhaps this is part of
why we like cosplaying.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Yeah, I know no common themes on this episode at all,
totally not Yeah, And.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
If you would like to contact us you can. You
can email us at Hello at stuff inever Told You
dot com. You can find us on Blue Sky at
mom Stuff podcast, or on Instagram and TikTok at stuff
I Never Told You for us on YouTube. We have
a new merchandise at Cotton Bureau, and we have a
book you can get wherever you get your books. Thanks
I always sart a super producer, senior executive producing my
indercontributor Joey, and thanks to you for listening. Stuff I
Never Told You is a protection of iHeart Radio. For
(31:50):
more podcasts from my heart Radio, you can check out
the heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or if you listen
to your favorite shown mo
Hey, this is Anny, and welcome to Steffan never told
your production of iHeart Radio. And yes, I am still
without Samantha, but I am joined today by a friend
(00:25):
of the show, friend in real life contributor Joey, who
has been with us several times, who is a good
nerd friend of mine, so much so that this episode
ballooned into two parts and we kept talking for about
an hour after it was over. But yes, we are
back with part two of our conversation with Joey about
(00:48):
New York Comic Con and fandom in general.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Go check out part one.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
If you haven't, as hinted at as discussed in that episode,
really need Samantha Torain is in because yeah, she was
outsick and we just had so much to say and
we kept going indeed after the mic was off. But
there's just so much that is going on with the
(01:15):
mainstreaming of fandom to talk about, and in fact, we
came up with several other episode ideas doing this, So
this was a surprise two parter. And so I just
want to put in the reminder here we are going
to be talking about sexual assault and harassment in this part,
(01:37):
not in detail, but that is where we're picking up
with the conversation today, so let's get back into our discussion.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
Last thing, I want to just discuss a little bit,
which this is what I was going out at the
top right. I said, it's touched a little bit on
sexual assault harassment. This kind of came top of mind
again because we did a story for There Aren't No
Girls on the Internet, which is another show that I
work on with Bridget High. Last week we did a
story about this increased problem with like sexual harassment and
assault at twitch Con, which was a.
Speaker 4 (02:09):
Couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
I think it was actually the week after Comic Con
in San Diego, and there was this really horrifying story
about this one particular creator who I guess Before the
convention there were a lot of concerns about assault and
about harassment in the way that a lot of streamers,
particularly female streamers, were treated. There was this one streamer
who had like a man like came on stage and
(02:31):
like physically assaulted her, and then what like she was
also facing some like harassment.
Speaker 4 (02:39):
There were all of these issues.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
It was like something to where this guy had been
a consistent problem. She had a bodyguard who usually was
with her and the bodyguard for some reason was well
not for some reason, he I guess had intervened with
another attack the previous twitch Con, and for some they
decided the course of action would be to ban the
bodyguard as as opposed to banning the guy that assaulted her,
(03:03):
which makes so much sense. And this brings up, you know,
another conversation about like parasocial relationships, particularly when it comes
to like these kind of streamers and creators and particularly
you know, women, and how that's dangerous. But it also
makes me think about again, like just your average Joe
cosplayer like me, if you're somebody who is at something
(03:23):
like hom Con, who you're like me, where you're you're
not like I don't have a bodyguard with me. I
you know, personally, I've been very lucky where like I've
never really had anything like really terrible happen. That being said,
I saw at the top of this episode this is
my first year where I dressed up as a female character,
which was interesting. Uh again, nothing too terrible. I think
(03:48):
like a couple of Evelli comments that I was sort
of like, oh interesting, I did have a man and
this I wouldn't qualify this as harassment or was a
man who was like very trying to flirt with me
unsuccessfully and then offered to my majoring sort of unprompted,
and I was sort of like, this is weird. I
didn't even start talking to you. I don't know why. Again,
I don't think that's harassed, but I think that's just
(04:08):
people being awkward. But I was sort of like, huh,
I'm not used to like having to deal with this.
I've talked to a lot of friends about this, particularly again,
like I usually dress bore masculine when I'm at these things.
Friends that think particularly that dress very feminine or like
more fem It's an issue every year, like there's always
something that happens. There's always it's usually just like comments,
(04:29):
you know, you're like getting shoved or like maybe.
Speaker 4 (04:33):
Some groping, like god forbid.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
But yeah, there's like something every year that's like weird
and uncomfortable.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
So it's like, like.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Going into this experience, I sort of like, I know
I have to be wary of like men being weird,
but yeah, I think hearing like that story from TwitchCon
and hearing like how much of backlash there was a
twitch Con this year, and the fact that it sounds
like there's a lot of female streamers that are now
pulling out because of what happened and because of it
not being taken seriously. It just makes me think about
(05:01):
the fact that, yeah, again, like what happens to the
rest of us that are dealing with this. I had
a friend say something at one point we were talking
and he was just like, yeah, you can tell fascisms
on the ride this rise this year, because the audacity
of men is like gone way up, and like he
was talking about the fact that we're like he got
shoved a bunch and like people were just like pushing
out of the way, and I was like, yeah, there's that.
And then also like every single girl that I've talked
(05:23):
to that I'm here with like has had somebody made
it some comment about a costume or about our body
or whatever.
Speaker 4 (05:28):
I had the first day when I.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Was dressed a wick in because I thought costume is
like a like skin tight bodysuit. This wasn't in the convention,
but I was at a cafe like across the street,
and like there was a man that was there that
was like very obviously like checking me out. I was
sort of like, this is weird. And uncomfortable. I moved
out of the way and he like followed me, and
I was like great, I'm not even surprised about this happening,
Like I knew this was going to happen at some point,
(05:50):
but yeah, it's annoying and uncomfortable.
Speaker 4 (05:52):
I think, well, my friend's life.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Was right where. I think there is some culture shift happening.
I think this is a reflection of it. It seems to
be worse this year. I haven't seen any reporting about
like the like numbers or incidents anything this year. I'm
interested to see, like what comes out of it, if
any like incidents did occur. But yeah, I don't know
what the solution is. I wish I did, but I
think there needs to be some sort of shift, whether
(06:16):
it's from the guests and the people there and the
culture there, or like from the convention team itself. I think, again,
this is like what I was talking about with the
way the space is organized. I think there's a lot
of issues that the actual like if if they want
to make this a good experience for people, if they
want this to be a thing that people want to
come back to, there are things that need to be fixed.
(06:39):
I'm still probably gonna go next year. I overhall had
a great time. I had a really fun time. There's
a lot of things I love about comic Con. I
love the people there. I love like getting to interact
with people. I love getting to meet new people again.
Like ninety nine percent of the interactions I have were
great and amazing and super fun.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
But there were a number of things.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
This time I think just showed that there are changes
that need to be made and I want them to
do better. Otherwise I'm worried about this event like being
able to happen in the next couple of years, you know.
So Yeah, not to end on a rough note, but
those are my takeaways this year. Again, that being said,
I did have a great time again. It's always fun
(07:22):
to dress up. It's always fun to just hang out
with friends and bond over all of our like nerdy
things that were into.
Speaker 4 (07:31):
I was really proud of myself.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
I bought a couple of things this year, but I
didn't spend too much money.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
So you know that was a win.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Nice, Yeah, I mean again, I you and I think
could talk forever and ever about this stuff. I feel
like in my experience, I too have seen that because
I started going to dragon Con, and I don't know,
like two thousand and eight a long time. I've been
going for a while, and back then it was pretty big,
(08:02):
but it was much smaller than it is now it is.
It's I think they said, like ninety thousand people came
this year.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Oh wow, yeah, and so there's have gone up a lot,
like born.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
So I think it's interesting that we're seeing this more
widespread embrace of nerd to nerd culture cause playing, although I.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Think some people take it way too seriously.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
And that's mostly men. That's most men.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
I'm like, guess what, you aren't actually the Mandalorian.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
I'm sorry, you know, I will say I feel like
there has at least been a decline in the Deadpool
cause players, because that was always that. They're always was huge,
a group, a like smattering of men dressed as Deadpool
that thought they were so funny and would just harass people.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
I've seen less of that, So, you.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Know what, maybe maybe it's now they're all the Mandalorian
and they're Stoyac and they yeah, I don't mess with me,
and so I don't know, I don't know, maybe that's
another cultural shift.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
To Dragon Con has a we have the big parade,
and we have the five oh first from Star Wars,
like you have to get in, and then we have
another one that is like, oh god, three hundred that
movie The Gladiators.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
And you have to like show your apps and like
get in.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
And I'm assuming workout all the time, and I'm just
like this is too much, my dudes. But this year
a friend asked me because I had a friend who'd
never been and I was kind of showing around and
she's like, to do any women to it? And I
was like, you know, I've never really seen it.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
They do. There's a huge section of it this year.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
And it's like I feel like we're getting some winds
and some we're getting some pushbacks.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
I don't know, Yeah, I don't know. It is the
weird thing where I was like I'm like yeah, like
I'm again like I came to like I remember being
a kid and being like a lot of this stuff
was like for the boys, it wasn't for the girls.
And now I feel like there is much more of
a like gender bound. It is like seen as for everybody.
(10:13):
There's like even I personally, like I was my little
sister is really into like all the like romanticy books
and whatever.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
I'm not, but you.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
Know what, I respect that for people that are into it.
There was like a fair amount of people that were
cause playing stuff from that, and I was like, yeah,
like stuff that's like more quote unquote female centric media too,
Like it does seem like there's more it's open, Like
there's more media that is kind of under this umbrella.
It is more open to like yeah, there's a lot
more things that are aimed like a sort of geared
(10:44):
towards queer people. They are geared towards people that aren't
just like straight white men. But yeah, but there always
is going to be this problem, like it is still
then I go into this thing too, and I'm always like, okay,
there's going to be some creepy man who makes some
strange comment at either me or at one of my friends,
and like, I don't know, it is yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Well one of the things one of the big pushes
at Dragon Con a couple of years ago was which
I used to not do this either, so I'm glad
it was a big push, but like you know, asking consent,
like before you take the picture, yeah, just like checking,
And so that became a really big thing. But one year,
when I was dressed as a winter soldier, a guy
was dressed as Captain America came up to me was like,
can I take a picture? And I said yes, And
(11:39):
the next thing I know, he just picked me up
in his arms and was like, I want you to
act like you're dead, and I was like, this has gone.
I don't know what kind of fantasy I helped you
live out.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
I don't know what this is.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
But he took the picture and they put me down
and left, and I was like that, I don't know
if I didn't really consent to that right I have
if you told me.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
I feel if you should ask, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
I come about this is very like I'm like I'll
ask people if I like to take their picture. I
feel like that's commons courtesy. I am like, if somebody's
saying a picture with me, if I'll be like yeah,
because it's so cool, if I like put my arm
around you or something like just I don't know. I
feel like it's like just it's common courtesy, Like it's
just being like, hey, is this okay. I don't want
to do anything that's going to be like uncomfortable for you.
I would hate if somebody put me in that position.
(12:28):
But yeah, I don't know, I don't know what is.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
Up with like some of Yeah, I was.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
I remember like a year I was talking to one
of my friends who I'm gonna be big because I
don't want to out her at all for any of them,
but if and she like she CAUs likes a female
DC character who is like very popular. She was like,
I just I don't think I can causeplay this character anymore,
like at conventions, just because like the amount of men
that come up to me and like make weird comments,
(12:55):
like unprompted, because like they're they're trying to I fel filled.
They're like fantasy where she was just like and I'm like,
I'm just here like to I'm in a little superhero costume.
Like it's not not that it would matter because it
but it's like not even a particularly like revealing one.
It's like a very just standard like superhero suit. I
(13:18):
don't know with the King and like again, it doesn't matter.
You could be wearing like you could be dressed as
anything and you would still have his comments and it
would not be okay. Uh but yeah, it is like
it's frustrating to like, like, I felt really sad for her,
where I was like, I know, this is like one
of your favorite characters.
Speaker 4 (13:34):
You like you, I've worked really hard on this costume.
Speaker 3 (13:38):
I've seen you cosplay this character for like years, and
it's so sad to hear you be like, I don't
think I can do this anymore in public just because
of the amount of comments that I get that are
so uncomfortable to deal with.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Yeah, And that's the I mean, it is really sad
because for people like like us, that love is that
you get excited about it.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
You're thinking about it, what am I gonna wear?
Speaker 1 (13:59):
When I'm gonna do And it can be I also
generally have really good interactions and it can be really
fun when someone comes up to you and does like
I used to get the Winter Soldier code words all
the time people I start saying yeah, yeah, which you
know if I didn't know them.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
I don't think I should be judged for not knowing them.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
But it was kind of funny, Like it was a
fun little interaction I would have. So most of it
has been I also have been very lucky where most
of it has been really pleasant, but it is a thing,
like I used to The number one creepy comment I
used to get was you know exactly what you're doing.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
Oh my gosh, I hate that. Yeah, that's the thing.
Even I was thinking about that. But again I said,
like the first day I was wearing that body suit
and I was like out at this cafe across the street,
and I was like, okay, like I guess I'm wearing
something a little bit more revealing, like I'm expecting something
to happen. But I was like, I'm dressed as a superhero.
I'm dressed as a Marvel Comics character. Like, no, I'm
(14:55):
what I'm doing is I'm dressing up.
Speaker 4 (14:57):
Like a comic book character.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
I like, because I'm going to do a comic to
have fun and be a nerd and like, I don't know, Yeah,
it's it's really like it's weird and uncomfortable. I think, like, yeah,
I'll be I'll be realized. There's definitely costumes to you
where ipen like, oh maybe I should do this character
and I'm like, I don't know if I'm really gonna
(15:18):
be like like I don't know. I was like, I
want I would love to like Cosway with Scarlet Witch
at some point, I love her like comic book costume.
I'm also like, do I really want to wear that
in public?
Speaker 4 (15:28):
Or am I?
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Am?
Speaker 4 (15:28):
I gonna be really uncomfortable? Am I gonna have to
deal with which?
Speaker 5 (15:31):
Like?
Speaker 4 (15:31):
And I I shouldn't have to worry about that.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
I should have to worry about that, And it makes
me sad that I'm like all of these creators that
I love to do, these amazing work that we get
this amazing like art are subject to that without like
nobody should have to.
Speaker 4 (15:43):
Deal with that.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
I don't know. Yeah, yeah, like I was saying before,
and like you said too, I do love like I
love when people ask you to take pictures.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
I love that. I love attention. Please thank you. Yes, Yeah,
I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (15:54):
I just feel like there's a very clear line of
like what is acceptable versus what isn't. And it's like, yeah,
you come with me for a picture or a picture
with you, that's fine, Like you if you were grabbing
me in a certain way, that is clearly not okay. Again,
I think it was and it was interesting, particularly being
like my the first time I'm dressing up as a
female character, also happens to be a character that's like
more masculine presenting. Yeah, but like still I was like, yeah,
(16:18):
Like I took a picture of being like like putting
his arm around my waist and I was kind of like, oh, okay,
Like I don't know if that's what I was going for.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
Also like I'm ready to pose with like.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
My fists up and everything, and I was like, oh, cool,
like that, we're not doing that. I guess it's not fun.
It's not fun. And I don't know.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
I just I don't I don't understand.
Speaker 3 (16:37):
I know what they're trying to achieve is we're trying
to be like it's a power thing.
Speaker 4 (16:41):
It's not about But I'm.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
Like, you're like you're just you're just making that annoying
for everybody else.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Yeah, and you're making it like cause again, a lot
of my interactions are very good, I got I think
a lot more people have been very affirming ever since
that whole there's kind of a like that happened at
Dragon Coon a couple of years ago with that you
asked for consent, yeah, yeah, take pictures, and now a
lot of people are very affirm and they're like, you
(17:07):
look fabulous. I usually would just go look, I get
you look fabulous. I don't know who you are. Can
I take a picture? And I'm like, yes, you've made
me feel good. That was a straightforward request, thank you.
Most of them are that, but every now you get
you don't know, you don't know, uh, especially if it's
a good yeah yeah, yeah, I want this to be
(17:32):
a fun time. I hope you're cool, but I don't
know because I've had some bad Again.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
I was talking about like that guy who like I
think he was well intentioned. I don't.
Speaker 4 (17:41):
I wouldn't say this was a craftsman.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
But we were like in line and he like started
talking to me and he like, I don't know where
we started, like oh yeah, can I buy you a drink?
And I was like, I'm it's like late in the day,
I'm tired. I'm just trying to like grab a beer
and go say with my friends for a little bit,
Like I I, this is.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
Not the time and place. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Like I was sort of like like and also same
thing where I was kind of like I don't know
what to expect. You could again, like I use this
could be just well, well intentioned, maybe a bit awkward,
or you could say something weird the minute that I
do something you don't like or whatever or yeah, And
I was kind of like, great, now I have to
(18:21):
be like, oh, like that, it's okay, actually I'm good,
but thank you. I like I have to like talk
you down from all that. Like now it's like an
extra layer of pressure for me, which I don't want
to have to deal with again. I'm just I'm tired,
I'm I'm I just want to go sit with my friends.
I don't want to. It's the point of the day
(18:42):
where we're all in the quarter sitting down, just like, ah, okay,
do you compress, Like.
Speaker 4 (18:46):
I don't want to deal with this.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Well and Dragon Con is interesting too because most people
will not most people, but a lot of people are
staying in the hotels, so you'll get as they do
a lot of hotel room parties. And that's just like
I have never been to one because as a woman.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
I feel like but I've had a friend who has
done it and had a good time, and she's she said,
and I had a I had I met a random
dude that I ended up really becoming friends with and
he invited me one and I think it would have
been okay, but she still don't know. Again, it makes
me sad that it's like these are the considerations.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
I think that's it. I think it's just it makes
me sad because I do again, like I I I
want to I'm somebody that I really want to assume
the best of people. I usually try to go into
situations like being cautious but assuming the best, and like
I think specifically this and I think I think yeah
with with ment to like I've kind of had a
personal reckoning over like the past couple of years where
I've been like, okay, like let's think about like, yes,
(19:51):
obviously I need to be cautious about like men being
weird or being creepy or doing something terrible, but like
I also don't want to just be terrified of interacting
with men period because I'm so afraid of something bad happening.
So it's like having to judge that situation in the moment,
having to be ready to like get out of there.
(20:13):
I mean, I like and luckily like for this kind
of thing, I was going with friends, I was with
people the entire time I was there.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
I was.
Speaker 3 (20:20):
There was a lot of there was a little bit
of like running around trying to find people one of.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
My I had, I had a friend.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
Like literally there were two days straight of the two
muths back and forth texting each other to try and
find each other, and it ended up like the last
hour the convention was open on Sunday, she like called
me and was like, I am standing at the coat rack.
Made me here right now, and I was like okay,
but yeah, No, it was like like I was there
with people I was, I had, I knew like if
something happened, I'll like I'm also kind of a friend
(20:47):
for some people where they know, like I'm not afraid
to yell at somebody if need be. So there's like
a couple of points where I was like, Okay, if
this sends up going I'm right here.
Speaker 4 (20:55):
If this starts going.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Weird, like just give me a signal and I'll go
over and get you out of there. But yeah, it
is it's like it's it's sad to have to be
like what is my safety plan with all of this
where it's like I literally doing like the nerdiest thing
I possibly could be doing.
Speaker 5 (21:11):
I don't know, yeah, yeah, I think overall, as discussed,
there have been a lot of strides, there's been a
lot of progress with that has come sort of a
(21:35):
backslide and now it's so popular, you we're seeing right
other issues.
Speaker 2 (21:38):
But I do think like it's.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
Always every time something we get some progress, things go
there's a backside.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
But I do think there has.
Speaker 3 (21:48):
There's been progress. There definitely has been and I think
saying here where there also was that conversation, I think
probably around the same time as drag Con, we're like
there's always the little Instagram post they'll put out before
com hondever or where they're like remember causeplays not consent,
blah blah blahlah, all these things that they do have,
you know, and again kind of going back to this
this Twitch story, shout out to bridget for I'm reading
(22:11):
entirely from her research.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
For this, so thank you bridget Ton.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
But like I think hearing that and being like this
is like the some of the worst stories I've heard
from this where there were like people it wasn't being
taken seriously, people were not like somebody was physically assaulted
in a mean great situation, and like it sounds like
it was just sort of swept under the rug and
they were like, oh, yeah, we're dealing with it. And
then like the guy was still at other panels for
(22:37):
some reason, like they're they're what it like that hearing
that and being like, so this is the extreme of
things not being taken seriously and what happens and again, yeah,
you're seeing that backlash of all of these female streamers
now pulling out of it and being like, I'm not
gonna if this is how you're going to behave this
is how you're going to treat these problems. I don't
want to be involved, which I think that makes me
nervous to see. Like I think we're at this tipping
(22:57):
point right now, where like we we could backslide real quick.
There's been a little bit, there's been some like trickling
of behavior that's maybe worse than usual, or this could
just be a fluke, and we could continue on this
momentum of like things are getting better, They're gonna get better. Yes,
you cannot do something about every single issue, but like
(23:19):
there's you know, the methods to report these things, or
there are people in place. I mean, I also like
I'll be like I talked to a couple of the
like staff members at some point too, and it sounded
like they all were like exhausted too, which I don't
know if that just there weren't enough people that were
working there or they had two in your responsibility. I
mean like there was a point where I was like
in line to go get like a water or something,
and there was a woman behind me who was like,
(23:39):
oh shit, Like she started like freak handle, but she's
like I need to go back to my shift, and
I was like here, like go in front of me,
like stop in line in front of me like that.
Speaker 4 (23:45):
I totally understand that.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Also, that's awful that like you literally do not have
enough time to get lunch on your lunch break because
of how much we're having to work, which is a
bigger issue too, also about like you know, how ploys
are treated at any sort of convention, like a whole
other conversation. But yeah, it's like like the there's again
there to tipping point. I think we could continue down
(24:09):
this path of like things improving and things getting better
at it being safer for people, or they could backslide
real quick.
Speaker 4 (24:15):
And I really hope that is not what ends up happening.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
I do as well. I do as well again, thank
you so much for being here. I could keep going and.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
This podcast is going to turn into U y comic
con commentary our favorite Star Wars cosplays.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Yes, I would be so down, I would be so
well before we get into that, where can the good
listeners find.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
To Yeah, you can find other other things that I
do again on There Are No Girls on the Internet
with Bridget Todd I. It is a bi weekly show
The Relea Tuesdays and Fridays.
Speaker 4 (25:02):
I mostly work on the Friday episodes.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
If you were interested in hearing that Twitch story that
I was talking about, it was the episode from October
twenty fourth. You can also I work on like a
number of the outspoken shows here at I Heeart so
you can also hear my work on Outlaws with Ys
Madison and also at the Black Bat Bem podcast.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
If you want to find.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Me online, you can find me at patnt Pratt on Instagram.
I guess because it's relevant, I'll plug my TikTok too.
My TikTok is hot topic, Dad, I have not been
using it as much lately, but I don't know. Send
a follow over.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
I don't know, and if you sell Joey in consplay
at Comic Con, you.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Could see by, you could see bike. Yeah, if you
saw me at comic Con, please send me pictures because
I can't even be like, oh, I don't have enough
pictures of me because I did make like my friends
take a bazillion pictures of me and like different poses
and stuff.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
But you know, I can always have more photos of myself.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
You can never have enough photos of yourself, especially in cosplay.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Especially in cosplay.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Yeah, I never get any good photos. It's the saddest thing.
And you know, the like one of those sometimes wonderful
sad thing about being disco Luke Skywalker is no one
knows what it is except like maybe five people, and
so I can't even search a tag.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
But everybody that does know what it is, it's like.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
Best thing they ever.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yeah, but I can't say there's no nothing I could
search other than like usually people that I'm wonder Woman
or the Golden Snitch.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
And this year I got a wrestler. I don't know who.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
It was interesting, but yeah, so I never get any
people take a bunch of pictures. I'm like, I'll never
see that. I'll never see that one.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
Yeah, yeah, that's not I think I always will either
do like a really obscure character or like a very
popular character where I'm like, this is just gonna get buried,
and like I'm sure if I look up like by
Cosplay New York Comics, there were like, yeah, three hundred
other people in that costume. Like I'm not gonna find myself.
I don't know, but yeah, fun stuff stuff please. Yes, Well,
(27:03):
hopefully we'll get to talk more about this soon, and
we are. We're trying to get Joey in on our
final Twilight viewing extravaganza, so hopefully that will happen.
Speaker 4 (27:16):
I will be there, It will happen.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
Yes again, am I somebody who's good at planning things
in advance?
Speaker 4 (27:24):
No, will it happen?
Speaker 3 (27:26):
Probably there's a good chance it's gonna happen, so I
say it will.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
I think we all want it enough that it will
happen in one way or another.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
But I'm so looking forward to that. And thank you
again for being here.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
Of course, anytime, do my Samantha and Prussia next time
for the entire episode?
Speaker 4 (27:47):
How long it takes before.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
We should hear her voice?
Speaker 3 (27:49):
She's got a good like.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Halloween voice, right, now.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Oh no, Samantha, wherever you are, feel better.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Thanks.
Speaker 4 (27:58):
Halloween is rough.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
Yeah, Oh my gosh. I actually got swine flu on
Halloween in college ones and now every Halloween and I
was quarantined, And now every Halloween I eat macaroni and
cheese because that's the first thing I could eat on Halloween,
and I was like, oh my gosh, I can finally
eat again.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
Anyway, it was I like the year that swine flu
there was like the swine flu epidemic. Yeah, because I
think I also, I don't think it was on Halloween,
but I had swine flu like during the fall that year.
Speaker 4 (28:30):
I was in elementary school at the time.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
But.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Well I was in college.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
That was the time. That was the time I forgot
I Sometimes I'm like, oh, oh yeah, there was like
a whole other that happened.
Speaker 6 (28:45):
But it was yeah, because I remember the moment being like,
how this is crazy that I got this this illness.
This is like I'm part of a cultural moment. And
then of course COVID had to Like COVID came in.
It was like, oh, that was a funny little quarantine
you had. Then let's look at this one.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Oh my gosh, Anyway, I hope every all your listeners
are well.
Speaker 2 (29:08):
This house.
Speaker 4 (29:09):
Yeah, yeah, I hope.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
Nobody is sick. I'm so sorry. It's rely is the
worst time to I always get sick the weekend after Halloween,
but like that's the I'm hoping it'll hold off until then.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
This year, we'll see, you know, Jack and Con has
what we call the kon crud.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
The con crud. Yeah, yeah, we got that two. I didn't.
I somehow didn't get it this year, knock on one.
I don't know how, but I did have a friend
who like had made a TikTok about it and was like,
I'm like, I'm waiting until I get sick. And then
the next day I got sick. So I'm like, I'm
just I'm just not saying anything. I'm not gonna jinx it.
I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
No.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
Yeah again, I've somehow once again, this is my month
of being out in public and costumes almost every weekend,
every weekend, not almost every weekend every weekend. So knock
on one, my immune system will will hold up at
least next four days.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
But we'll see. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:04):
I used to think it's because a lot of the
characters that cosplayed had clubs and a mask, and maybe
that's why.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
I didn't get it.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Well that's what I was I was excited to do
when I told her this year, because I was like,
I can just mask and not Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I don't know if there's any truth to that at all,
but let's say, who is to say, alright, alright, well, yes,
happy Halloween, Happy Halloween. I know it's already happened by
the time you listen to this, but hopefully it's good.
Speaker 4 (30:32):
It could still be Halloween.
Speaker 3 (30:34):
I have a lot of people who.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
Are doing next weekend, the weekend after Halloween.
Speaker 3 (30:37):
There's this one guy on TikTok that I always see.
He's very funny, but he made a video being like,
why Halloween is one day this year? Should I shouldn't
be happy to go to Halloween parties on November first?
Screw that. I want to go to Halloween parties like
through Thanksgiving, all of the Halloween parties. I don't who
who wants there to be less Halloween parties. I was
(30:58):
so excited that Halloween's a Friday this year, so I
have like, yeah, November, I am going to a November
first Halloween party, and I'm very excited about it. Let's
go open that weekend as well. You know exactly you
want there to be less Halloween.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
What's there to be less Halloween?
Speaker 2 (31:14):
Not me?
Speaker 3 (31:14):
By holiday?
Speaker 2 (31:15):
It is agreed, hard agree. Perhaps this is part of
why we like cosplaying.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Yeah, I know no common themes on this episode at all,
totally not Yeah, And.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
If you would like to contact us you can. You
can email us at Hello at stuff inever Told You
dot com. You can find us on Blue Sky at
mom Stuff podcast, or on Instagram and TikTok at stuff
I Never Told You for us on YouTube. We have
a new merchandise at Cotton Bureau, and we have a
book you can get wherever you get your books. Thanks
I always sart a super producer, senior executive producing my
indercontributor Joey, and thanks to you for listening. Stuff I
Never Told You is a protection of iHeart Radio. For
(31:50):
more podcasts from my heart Radio, you can check out
the heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or if you listen
to your favorite shown mo
Stuff Mom Never Told You News
Hosts And Creators
Anney Reese
Samantha McVey
Popular Podcasts
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.