In this edition of Final DestinaTrend: Blood Zeits, Jack and special guest co-host Pallavi Gunalan discuss the "water based cooking" trend on TikTok, Mr. Beast being hot now (???), Trump making it nigh impossible for Americans to get COVID boosters, UK kids thinking they'd be better off without the internet, Trump's pick for the IRS and much more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Final
Destination trend blood Zites.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Which one of us will die by the end of
the other.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
Pros all of us. If I if I had to
guess based on that dang movie that I think just
came out, we were having a lively discussion to producer
Victor was doing his best not to spoil it, but like,
did you.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
See the the promo for it, the trailer.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
No, there's a promo truck with logs on the back.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Oh yeah, yeah, I did see that.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
I was driving her.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
I'm like, that's literally what our entire generation thinks whenever
we were behind a truck.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
But it's so funny, Like, please, my name is Jacko.
Brian That over there is my co host for today.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Paul Miles is never coming back.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
She killed Miles in a roundabout way. You put a
final destination on Key and all of us.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
And yeah, and also like also the Saw movies also
at the same time.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Kind of added on a hat. But you needed to.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
Get the tricycle part because I thought it was cute,
you know.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
All right, Well, this is the episode where we tell
some people what is trending on this Wednesday, May twenty.
First this afternoon, let's see TikTok has reinvented soup. Uh
is one way to read this story. Super producer Victor linked.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
Super producer producer Victor linked true to this video on
TikTok where it says, pov, you started water based cooking,
and now your skin is clear, your stomach is thriving,
and you recover from illness overnight.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
Holy shit, to.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Be fair, it's like water based, Like it's based.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
And then like that text is over a series of
pictures of soups being cooked and then vegetables being steamed,
which it's.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
Do you think the skin is just getting better because
like their face is over steamed. They're just getting They're
just getting like a spa treatment. You know.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
It's like I I think all of the things that
they're showing look delicious and healthy. So I'm not here
to say this is a bad This isn't like one
of the bad ones where you know people are like
I eat a little bit of plastic every day and it's.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
You're getting This is why I also don't mind like
the Stanley cup water thing.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
I'm like, as long as.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
You're drinking water, and eating your veggies kids, you know.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Yeah, I also don't mind the the crispy diet coke
thing where they just have like a really nicely refrigerated
diet coke. Now that is poison, but I just like
that it's not like and if you drink five diet
cokes you'll never die gone. They're just really a lot
(03:00):
of loving attention lavished on the experience of having a
single die cook. But yeah, this just seems like, I
don't know, taking centuries old recipes and cooking techniques and
turning it into a viral trend by being like hot
water based water based cooking.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
This is like when like white people discovered turmeric and like, right,
we were like why were our fingers stained for centuries
for you to just find this out?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
That's right. We love rediscovering things and being like pov,
you've just invented a new type of cooking.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
We need to, like, I think, instead of trying to
like do a revolution or like do things through a
system where we legislate human rights, I think we need
to distract white people with like Easter eggs and like
constantly help them, like think like they're discovering new things,
you know, just be like, Oh my god, good job.
It's America. Oh my god, water based cooking.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Good job.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
If that were happening right now, I'm I'm not sure
I'd be able to distinguish it from what from our
current timeline, because I feel like I feel like white
people love being online and on TikTok looking for little
Easter eggs and clues that have been left for them
by the powers that be. Mister Beast is hot now.
(04:19):
It seems like he went to the same person as
Mark Zuckerberg hot all dating brick.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
I guess when he got jacked or whatever.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Yeah, yeah, he just or like Matt right, is that
the Matt rife? Is that the guys who the comedian
who has like a jaw implants feels like mister got.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
Like, oh oh, it's like classic yeah, or Mullaney mullaney too.
Oh my god, Well, Mullenie's jaw has changed.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Interesting.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Don't parasocial get mad at me, audience. Okay, his jaw
looks different.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I have seen that online, but I didn't. I guess
I didn't notice that. I thought it was god.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Mister Bee's face looks crazy.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Good, crazy good. Sorry, he looks.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
His facial hair looks like the Tiger King he does.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
It could be that he's just accentuating his jawline with
a little uh beard, you know what I mean. That's a.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
No, his face is different.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
Also Leah Sampson, a good friend of mine who's hilarious comedian,
lives in New York. The first comment under this complex
post is what half white, half black woman is responsible
for this?
Speaker 3 (05:34):
She posted underneath.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Also, oh, Michael B.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Jordan has done. He's gotten his graphics, like we all
need pointing out.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Yeah, we don't. We don't mind it. Sometimes sometimes you're
allowed to have your jaw redone.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Yeah, he totally like he didn't have a chin before,
and then now he.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
Has The Wire. He's plays a character who goes missing
and uh it's one of the more heartbreaking moments in
The Wire. Yeah, and he did not have a chin
back then.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
I think by the time he was on like Parenthood,
he had a chin.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Oh yeah, yeah great.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
But I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Men can get gender firming care. That's fine. That's I'm
fine with that, you know, if they feel better about themselves.
I just don't think mister Beast is hot.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
Now.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
I don't think this hot now it's official. Find a
new angle.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
Is he on the what is what chocolate? Does he
sell beast treats or whatever?
Speaker 1 (06:32):
The fuck? What the beast treats? I thought it was
just like mister beast Chocolate. I didn't know that it
had a name that made you feel like a dog.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
I don't think they. I think I made that up.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
But hire me for branding beastables, crustables and Beastables.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Yeah, I don't think he's hot. Now I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Next question, No further questions, your honor. Uh. Trump is quiet,
making it impossible to get COVID boosters for most Americans,
essentially despite the fact that he has tried to take
credit for the COVID vaccine roll out, calling it one
of the greatest miracles of the ages. He is also
(07:17):
you know, he knows that his base does not like
COVID and does not like to does not like the VEA.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
They like COVID, they love COVID.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
They can't get anough of it. They did not like
the vaccine, and so he is doing what the people want.
And you know, with the help of RFK, the government
had previously recommended seasonal vaccines for all Americans six months
and older, and now they have announced their direction going forward,
(07:50):
which will be only given to adults sixty five and older,
as well as children and younger adults with at least
one high risk health problem.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
Everyone else is going to get injected with COVID.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
That's right. You do have to come in and get injected.
Speaker 3 (08:05):
Objective yet injected. You have that, you're gonna have a card,
it'll say, here's COVID.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
One immediate blatant problem with this change is that the
FDA didn't offer any intention to establish carve outs for
caregivers of people who still qualify for COVID vaccines under
its new rules, which would be smart. It just it
feels like they give everything the level of thought that
a Hollywood screenwriter would, where it's just like, we're gonna,
(08:32):
we're gonna make this change because it's going to look
like this to people who aren't really paying attention and
moving on.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
We you know, it's almost worse because Hollywood screenwriters have
to answer to their fucking nerd fans, and Trump has
to answer to like the press, the White House Press Corps,
which are now people that are.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Like, hey, Trump, I heard your dick is good.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Like.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
How is you dick so good, Like that's the extent
that they ask him Bush.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Now, that's a really good question that a lot of
people are asking. My dick is great. They're saying it's
one of the great dicks of the ages, miracles of
the ages.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Sure if you heard that it needs a boot, it
doesn't need a booster.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Okay, yeah, but a lot of people are pointing, uh,
pushing back on this and saying, you know, you have
to make allowances for people who are going to be
you know, caregivers for.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
This, so to COVID potentially, well, I'm sure.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
The Trump administration will be quick to respond to that. Aka,
just ignore the shit out of it. Have you seen
Tom Cruise eating popcorn of late?
Speaker 2 (09:39):
I've heard so many things about Tom Cruise and popcorn.
I've seen like random I'm like, why is he going
to have a popcorn line? Like why am I seeing?
There was one where he was walking a stage and
he pointed out that somebody had already eaten their popcorn
before the movie.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
There's walking off over.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Popcorn to AMC employees.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
And now we've seen what it looks like as he's
eat popcorn and he's like basically throwing fastball, Like each
piece of popcorn he's like throwing into his mouth.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
He does his own stunt ferocity.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
It's kind of wild.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Do you have Can you imagine Tom Cruise being normal
in any situation?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
No, exactly, It's it is such a nightmare to like
have somebody point out how quickly you've eaten your popcorn.
I always finish my popcorn way too fast, and like
I go in with intention being like I'm not going
to finish my popcorn. I'm gonna finish this popcorn is
going to be here at the like act too, you know,
(10:41):
like as as we're heading into act three, I'll be
polishing this bad boy off. I'm gonna do a thing
where I eat the top half with my drink and
then the bottom half I mix it. I'm sure, sour
patch kit, I got.
Speaker 5 (10:55):
Two things of popcorn, one for the pre movie, for
the maybe another third one for after I go double
handed and my mouth at the same time, scoop.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Double handed and your messages, all of.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
It in as fast as possible inhal you know, like
one of the worms from Dune, just just gobbling it up.
Speaker 3 (11:15):
It's all over my face.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
After I can't look anyone in the eye, and that's
how you.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
Enjoy a movie.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
It is like as people are making fun of Tom
Cruise for how he eats popcorn, and it is strange.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
I do a thing about him, though.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Everybody like I when I eat popcorn, I look insane, ridiculous. Yeah,
I'm like, oh, just like shoving it into my mouth.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
The theater is dark.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
It's not to watch the movie better, it's to eat
your popcorn and shame.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
There's no like you know, it's the opposite of a
Rese's there's that reces ad campaign. There's no wrong way
to eat a reces There's no right way to eat popcorn.
It's just always bad. I feel like I'm when I
put it in my mouth. My wife is My wife
is like, what are you? Why do you eat it
like that? And I just ask her to, you know,
kindly turn around and not look at me. I'm hideous.
(12:09):
But it is such a Tom Cruise way to eat popcorn,
just like he I have seen. It's like, have you
ever seen somebody who like pops cashews or like peanuts
into their mouth. It's like kind of it's like an
upward toss into the mouth.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
It's very like I'm an alpha male. I'm making the
business deals here.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
But every popcorn thing and it's just so high risk,
high reward, which is how Tom Cruise lives his life.
But yeah, I would try that, and if I got
like three in a row, I would feel like I
was on the top of the on top of the world. Yeah,
I would be like taking out my eye like I would.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
It would be Jack doesn't do his own popcorn.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
I don't. I need somebody to step in for me. Yeah,
because it's not like throwing it up and catching it
in your mouth where it's like a nice lazy arc.
It's just an upward fastball.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
I don't have the patience to wait for it to
fall down. I need it in my mouth faster. Also,
I think the other surprising thing is that Tom Cruise
eats popcorn, which like I'm like, what, I would think
he would eat some sort of gray goo, you know.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Yeah, I think it's gray go. And then I mean
it is one thing that is still impossibly movie star
slash scientology like hyperbaric chamber of him is eating the
popcorn one piece at a time. Is like who has
that restraint? You know?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Yeah, I'm like that's that would be a bigger stunt
for me than learning how to ride a motorcycle.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Offic club. I'm like, yeah, yeah, I got it.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Whatever, But I'm like the popcorn, I can't wait. They're like, oh, cut,
go again.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
God, the people behind me would be getting pelted with
so many individual pieces of popcorn, because I'd also be
like in a panic to get more popcorn and off sweating.
You know, let's take a quick break and we'll be
right back breaking with me. I don't know. We're just
gonna have a normal adult conversation in a public place,
(14:15):
just because I think it's going to go so well
that I want other people to see how well it's
not all right?
Speaker 2 (14:20):
Cool?
Speaker 1 (14:30):
And we're back. And for some reason, during the break,
we started talking about Clint Eastwood movies, because that's like,
that is like an alpha move of throwing popcorn, and
it feels like east Wood. I feel like it's a
little too much work for Eastwood. Like Eastwood would eat
a single kernel at a time, but like kind of suspiciously.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
And but that's why his eyes are so squinty all
the time. He started to get popcorn in them.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
Yeah, just like one at a time and kind of
like without joy.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Yeahcorn with him randomly Yeah, yeah, like such one dimensional
female characters where they're like I hate you and then
all of it, all of a.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Sudden it turns into like lust when you want.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
To Secretly everybody wants to have sex with Clint Eastwood
no matter how old they are and how old he is.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
I know, I was like, like I could I watched
his movies because I like missed them or what like
they weren't in my zeitgeist, and so I was like, oh,
I should watch these as an adult to see what
the like cultural references. And it's literally just like Clint
Eastwood writing scripts of what he thinks is cool from
like probably when he was like a teen, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
Yeah, and also he like just can't stop having kids,
so it might not be that dissimilar from what.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
Oh really is he like that too?
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Yeah? Yeah, he just like walks into There's a very
funny podcast, The Action Boys, that covers Clint Eastwood movies
a lot, and they talk about how his sperm is
like airborne. You just like get in the same room
with them and like you be come pregnant.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
How many kids does he have?
Speaker 1 (16:02):
He is eight? But like he's still having them like
with people ninety.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Yeah ew ew.
Speaker 3 (16:10):
And he's married. He's been married like five times.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Yeah yeah. Gross.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
At least it says children at least.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Eight, at least eight that we know.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
There's no way to know.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
He's had numerous casual and series okay, yeah, many of
which have overlapped.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
Gross.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
This man will sit on any any woman and chairs
and any chairs at a Republican national conference.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
That's right, all right. There is a new survey that
The Guardian is covering that finds that almost half of
young people would prefer a world without internet. This is
a UK study that has found that nearly seventy percent
of sixteen to twenty one year olds feel worse about
themselves after spending time on social media, and half would
(17:00):
support a digital curfew that would restrict their access to
certain apps and sites past ten pm. Forty six percent
said they would rather be young in a world without
the Internet altogether.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
I'm going to be honest, it was fun growing up
with limited access to the internet. Like I had fun,
I went outside. I'm not necessarily saying it's better because
I wouldn't know that experience, but like I was just
thinking about all the crazy shit we did as kids,
and how it was like real interactive social stuff and
it was hard, like there was bullying and whatever, but
(17:33):
like we came up we made our own fun.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
We were like tepeeing houses.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
And shit, you know, yeah, we will.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Do that anymore. Do they do they do tp houses?
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Well, we have talked about how the two things that
have faced massive shortages are toilet paper and eggs, the
two things that we used to throw at people's houses.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Shit.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
So yeah, damn, these kids are growing up in a struggle.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
I never used to know.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
It's been bad for quietly retaliated against nemeses in middle school.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
There was also like a thing recently where they talked
about how people like our phones like tracked how many
selfies we would delete and then try to advertise like
beauty products to us.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Like yeah that makes sense, isn't that a thing?
Speaker 3 (18:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yeah, Like that's so gross. It's like they're literally squeezing
us for everything. And these are like kids like teens,
you know.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Yeah, and if your phone is just like subtly suggesting
to you that you need to fix the way you look,
like that can't be good.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
When you're a teenager. You need skincare.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
I'm like, this is crazy, it's yeah, and it feels
I do really feel like it's taken away a big
chunk of people's free will and that we're in a
much worse place than we realize. When it comes to
the amount of time, a quarter of respondents spent four
more hours a day on social media. Forty two percent
of those surveyed admitted to lying to their parents and
(18:57):
guardians about what they do online, and while I'm forty
two percent said that they had lied about their age.
Forty percent admitted to having a decoy or burner account.
I mean that stuff all seems pretty harmless. Uh. Twenty
seven percent said they pretend to be a different person completely.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
They're like, no, mom, I'm just jacking off in here.
I'm not looking at things to consume. I swear to God,
I swear to God, I'm just jerking it. I'm just
jerking it to the friend of yours. But I'm not
trying to buy more shit, I promise.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
It. Yeah. I just I think boredom is underrated, you know.
I think like having to make your own fun and
just like come up with shit and not always have
an option that is going to distract you and occupy
your brain with something that has been like market tested
to divert you and give you an idea that like
steers you towards consumption. Like I feel like in a
(19:50):
very obvious way that is it would be preferable to
not exist online.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, I mean, I like it is good for like
being aware of like political issues and like if you
can get outside of your bubble, which a lot of
people can't online. But I also feel like there's not
enough like interaction with like human beings when you're trying
to like solve a problem for like critical thinking, Like
it used to be we have a question and you'd
be like, well, do you think it's this or that?
Speaker 3 (20:16):
And like we wouldn't immediately go to our phones.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
Right, but we're kind of what is it called like
offloading or substituting outsourcing outsourcing, Yeah, logic to like AI
or whatever. Yeah, so even even now, like yeah, you
can look it up, but do you know like the
sources correct. I don't even think we have necessarily the
talk it out skills that we used to.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
You know, I definitely don't have the talk it out
skills that I used to have. I'm fortunately just have
an AI script writer that writes everything that I say,
so in your brain, in my brain.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Yeah, and planning and in black situation.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
That's the one place that I trust Elon Musk. I
think he's off base on a lot of stuff, but
I do trust him to implanting a chip into my
brain to help me google things in my brain.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Here's a crazy thing. I don't know if this is
bad to say, but I went to college with someone
who's like third in line at Neuralink.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Wow, in line, like in the leadership, in line to
get the thing put no, no.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
No in leader like he's at he's been at the
company since we like graduated.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (21:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
So I'm like, I'm I'm very curious, like what the
internal because a lot of like, like I worked on
neural probes in my Masters and the idea was to
implant a probe to help a prosthetic move by you
thinking right, so like amputees and stuff. But like with Neuralink,
I'm like, what else are they doing up there? And
then like because initially when it came out, I was like, Oh,
(21:47):
that's cool. They're like trying to do a similar thing,
you know, assist people who have don't have like access
to movement or whatever.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Yeah, but it's tough.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Yeah, I feel like that. Do you know back in
the days when before all tech had just like gone
down this like a dark fascist libertarian directions optimized, Yeah,
I was like optimistic. I was like, that's cool, Like
it's going to be enable us to like create new senses.
Like it not just like helps people who have lost
(22:19):
certain senses, but like, you know, it could enable us
to like have feeds that like enable us you.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Know, biomimicry stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Yeah. So suddenly like you're just trailed by a drone
that gives you like a bird's eye view of everything
around you and it's like goes directly into your brain
or like something. You know, that stuff all seemed like cool,
and now it just feels like, no, they'd find a
way to like fuck with you that.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
They monitor your head.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Yeah, yeah, exactly. And speaking of monetization, Trump's pick to
head the IRS, Billy Long is it's just like I
don't I don't even note, Like I guess I just
feel like we have to keep talking about this shit
because it's so openly corrupt. But he is somebody who
(23:09):
like has told business executives like that he's going to
give them tax breaks, like they're just he's like, they're like, yeah,
I mean this is gonna be great. He's like making
sure that we never like he's giving them these passes
that are basically like I'm audit proof because of this
guy who and like the way they're like talking about
(23:30):
they're just speaking openly on these like recorded zoom calls
and just being like, yeah, it's pretty crazy. Uh. I
call up one of my friends and I say, Hey,
the IRS Commissioner Billy Long, the new one coming in
that we're all excited about. Is Billy coming too the inauguration?
My friend says, well, he doesn't have a ticket. He's
(23:51):
not because he's not confirmed yet. And I said, well,
make him my guest. And then he goes on to
say they had one dinner, spent a few nights together, and.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
That he it was a whirlwind romance.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
What yeah, exactly. And then he said that he was
told that his company companies would no longer have to
worry about IRS scrutiny on like certain subjects because like
specifically these employee retention tax credits, which the IRS was
thinking about shutting down the quote. Is he actually pushed
(24:27):
erc the employee retention credits? Is that not a blessing?
We could be worried about promoter audits now, we could
be worried about anything with the old administration, but Billy
actually is now taking over and we don't have to
worry about that stuff.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
So it's just like the rich have nothing to fear
but fear itself.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Yes, exactly, like literally, and we don't even have to
fear fear itself because we have all the good pharmaceuticals.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Like in this meeting, he's like I had to tell
the guy, please take your sales hat off and put
your IRS commissioner hat on.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
That insane dude, Like you're not trying.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
To sell me anything. You're you're the IRS commissioner. You
can't be like constantly like trying to win my business
as the IRS commissioner.
Speaker 3 (25:11):
That's so crazy.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
That's so crazy that people think self regulation would ever work,
like exactly.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
Anyways, good world that we have here, Paula. The always
a pleasure having you. Where can people find you? Follow you?
All that good stuff?
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Dallas, Sunday May twenty fifth, nine pm, Dallas Comedy Club.
Speaker 3 (25:31):
Please come out.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
Please tell everybody please buy tickets. If you come out,
I will say hi after the show and me at
Paula Veganolan p A l A v I g U
n A l A N. I also run a show
at the Comedy Store monthly called Facial Recognition Comedy with
my friends. We had bought some usufon on Friday, which
is crazy. Yeah, he's so sweet, so smart and so fun.
(25:54):
But yeah, I don't know if we're gonna have a
June show, but we are gonna have a July show,
so come through.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
The shows are always so great. Everybody should be going monthly.
And please, if you're in Dallas, zeigang pull up show
Polly's Love. That is going to do it for us
this afternoon. We are back tomorrow with a whole last
episode of the show. Until then, be kind to each other,
be kind to yourselves. Get your vaccines while you still
(26:19):
can goward them. Yeah for real, so go get your
flu shots. Don't do nothing about white supremacy, and we
will talk to y'all tomorrow. Bye bye bye.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
The Daily Zeit Guys is executive produced by Catherine.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
Law, co produced by Bae Wayne, co produced by Victor
Wright
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Co written by j M McNabb and edited and engineered
by Brian Jefferies.
Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Final
Destination trend blood Zites.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Which one of us will die by the end of
the other.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
Pros all of us. If I if I had to
guess based on that dang movie that I think just
came out, we were having a lively discussion to producer
Victor was doing his best not to spoil it, but like,
did you.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
See the the promo for it, the trailer.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
No, there's a promo truck with logs on the back.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Oh yeah, yeah, I did see that.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
I was driving her.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
I'm like, that's literally what our entire generation thinks whenever
we were behind a truck.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
But it's so funny, Like, please, my name is Jacko.
Brian That over there is my co host for today.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Paul Miles is never coming back.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
She killed Miles in a roundabout way. You put a
final destination on Key and all of us.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
And yeah, and also like also the Saw movies also
at the same time.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Kind of added on a hat. But you needed to.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
Get the tricycle part because I thought it was cute,
you know.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
All right, Well, this is the episode where we tell
some people what is trending on this Wednesday, May twenty.
First this afternoon, let's see TikTok has reinvented soup. Uh
is one way to read this story. Super producer Victor linked.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
Super producer producer Victor linked true to this video on
TikTok where it says, pov, you started water based cooking,
and now your skin is clear, your stomach is thriving,
and you recover from illness overnight.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
Holy shit, to.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Be fair, it's like water based, Like it's based.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
And then like that text is over a series of
pictures of soups being cooked and then vegetables being steamed,
which it's.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
Do you think the skin is just getting better because
like their face is over steamed. They're just getting They're
just getting like a spa treatment. You know.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
It's like I I think all of the things that
they're showing look delicious and healthy. So I'm not here
to say this is a bad This isn't like one
of the bad ones where you know people are like
I eat a little bit of plastic every day and it's.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
You're getting This is why I also don't mind like
the Stanley cup water thing.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
I'm like, as long as.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
You're drinking water, and eating your veggies kids, you know.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Yeah, I also don't mind the the crispy diet coke
thing where they just have like a really nicely refrigerated
diet coke. Now that is poison, but I just like
that it's not like and if you drink five diet
cokes you'll never die gone. They're just really a lot
(03:00):
of loving attention lavished on the experience of having a
single die cook. But yeah, this just seems like, I
don't know, taking centuries old recipes and cooking techniques and
turning it into a viral trend by being like hot
water based water based cooking.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
This is like when like white people discovered turmeric and like, right,
we were like why were our fingers stained for centuries
for you to just find this out?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
That's right. We love rediscovering things and being like pov,
you've just invented a new type of cooking.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
We need to, like, I think, instead of trying to
like do a revolution or like do things through a
system where we legislate human rights, I think we need
to distract white people with like Easter eggs and like
constantly help them, like think like they're discovering new things,
you know, just be like, Oh my god, good job.
It's America. Oh my god, water based cooking.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Good job.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
If that were happening right now, I'm I'm not sure
I'd be able to distinguish it from what from our
current timeline, because I feel like I feel like white
people love being online and on TikTok looking for little
Easter eggs and clues that have been left for them
by the powers that be. Mister Beast is hot now.
(04:19):
It seems like he went to the same person as
Mark Zuckerberg hot all dating brick.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
I guess when he got jacked or whatever.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Yeah, yeah, he just or like Matt right, is that
the Matt rife? Is that the guys who the comedian
who has like a jaw implants feels like mister got.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
Like, oh oh, it's like classic yeah, or Mullaney mullaney too.
Oh my god, Well, Mullenie's jaw has changed.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Interesting.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Don't parasocial get mad at me, audience. Okay, his jaw
looks different.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I have seen that online, but I didn't. I guess
I didn't notice that. I thought it was god.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Mister Bee's face looks crazy.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Good, crazy good. Sorry, he looks.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
His facial hair looks like the Tiger King he does.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
It could be that he's just accentuating his jawline with
a little uh beard, you know what I mean. That's a.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
No, his face is different.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
Also Leah Sampson, a good friend of mine who's hilarious comedian,
lives in New York. The first comment under this complex
post is what half white, half black woman is responsible
for this?
Speaker 3 (05:34):
She posted underneath.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Also, oh, Michael B.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Jordan has done. He's gotten his graphics, like we all
need pointing out.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Yeah, we don't. We don't mind it. Sometimes sometimes you're
allowed to have your jaw redone.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Yeah, he totally like he didn't have a chin before,
and then now he.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
Has The Wire. He's plays a character who goes missing
and uh it's one of the more heartbreaking moments in
The Wire. Yeah, and he did not have a chin
back then.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
I think by the time he was on like Parenthood,
he had a chin.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Oh yeah, yeah great.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
But I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Men can get gender firming care. That's fine. That's I'm
fine with that, you know, if they feel better about themselves.
I just don't think mister Beast is hot.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
Now.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
I don't think this hot now it's official. Find a
new angle.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
Is he on the what is what chocolate? Does he
sell beast treats or whatever?
Speaker 1 (06:32):
The fuck? What the beast treats? I thought it was
just like mister beast Chocolate. I didn't know that it
had a name that made you feel like a dog.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
I don't think they. I think I made that up.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
But hire me for branding beastables, crustables and Beastables.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Yeah, I don't think he's hot. Now I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Next question, No further questions, your honor. Uh. Trump is quiet,
making it impossible to get COVID boosters for most Americans,
essentially despite the fact that he has tried to take
credit for the COVID vaccine roll out, calling it one
of the greatest miracles of the ages. He is also
(07:17):
you know, he knows that his base does not like
COVID and does not like to does not like the VEA.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
They like COVID, they love COVID.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
They can't get anough of it. They did not like
the vaccine, and so he is doing what the people want.
And you know, with the help of RFK, the government
had previously recommended seasonal vaccines for all Americans six months
and older, and now they have announced their direction going forward,
(07:50):
which will be only given to adults sixty five and older,
as well as children and younger adults with at least
one high risk health problem.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
Everyone else is going to get injected with COVID.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
That's right. You do have to come in and get injected.
Speaker 3 (08:05):
Objective yet injected. You have that, you're gonna have a card,
it'll say, here's COVID.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
One immediate blatant problem with this change is that the
FDA didn't offer any intention to establish carve outs for
caregivers of people who still qualify for COVID vaccines under
its new rules, which would be smart. It just it
feels like they give everything the level of thought that
a Hollywood screenwriter would, where it's just like, we're gonna,
(08:32):
we're gonna make this change because it's going to look
like this to people who aren't really paying attention and
moving on.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
We you know, it's almost worse because Hollywood screenwriters have
to answer to their fucking nerd fans, and Trump has
to answer to like the press, the White House Press Corps,
which are now people that are.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Like, hey, Trump, I heard your dick is good.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Like.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
How is you dick so good, Like that's the extent
that they ask him Bush.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Now, that's a really good question that a lot of
people are asking. My dick is great. They're saying it's
one of the great dicks of the ages, miracles of
the ages.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Sure if you heard that it needs a boot, it
doesn't need a booster.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Okay, yeah, but a lot of people are pointing, uh,
pushing back on this and saying, you know, you have
to make allowances for people who are going to be
you know, caregivers for.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
This, so to COVID potentially, well, I'm sure.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
The Trump administration will be quick to respond to that. Aka,
just ignore the shit out of it. Have you seen
Tom Cruise eating popcorn of late?
Speaker 2 (09:39):
I've heard so many things about Tom Cruise and popcorn.
I've seen like random I'm like, why is he going
to have a popcorn line? Like why am I seeing?
There was one where he was walking a stage and
he pointed out that somebody had already eaten their popcorn
before the movie.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
There's walking off over.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Popcorn to AMC employees.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
And now we've seen what it looks like as he's
eat popcorn and he's like basically throwing fastball, Like each
piece of popcorn he's like throwing into his mouth.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
He does his own stunt ferocity.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
It's kind of wild.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Do you have Can you imagine Tom Cruise being normal
in any situation?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
No, exactly, It's it is such a nightmare to like
have somebody point out how quickly you've eaten your popcorn.
I always finish my popcorn way too fast, and like
I go in with intention being like I'm not going
to finish my popcorn. I'm gonna finish this popcorn is
going to be here at the like act too, you know,
(10:41):
like as as we're heading into act three, I'll be
polishing this bad boy off. I'm gonna do a thing
where I eat the top half with my drink and
then the bottom half I mix it. I'm sure, sour
patch kit, I got.
Speaker 5 (10:55):
Two things of popcorn, one for the pre movie, for
the maybe another third one for after I go double
handed and my mouth at the same time, scoop.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Double handed and your messages, all of.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
It in as fast as possible inhal you know, like
one of the worms from Dune, just just gobbling it up.
Speaker 3 (11:15):
It's all over my face.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
After I can't look anyone in the eye, and that's
how you.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
Enjoy a movie.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
It is like as people are making fun of Tom
Cruise for how he eats popcorn, and it is strange.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
I do a thing about him, though.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Everybody like I when I eat popcorn, I look insane, ridiculous. Yeah,
I'm like, oh, just like shoving it into my mouth.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
The theater is dark.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
It's not to watch the movie better, it's to eat
your popcorn and shame.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
There's no like you know, it's the opposite of a
Rese's there's that reces ad campaign. There's no wrong way
to eat a reces There's no right way to eat popcorn.
It's just always bad. I feel like I'm when I
put it in my mouth. My wife is My wife
is like, what are you? Why do you eat it
like that? And I just ask her to, you know,
kindly turn around and not look at me. I'm hideous.
(12:09):
But it is such a Tom Cruise way to eat popcorn,
just like he I have seen. It's like, have you
ever seen somebody who like pops cashews or like peanuts
into their mouth. It's like kind of it's like an
upward toss into the mouth.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
It's very like I'm an alpha male. I'm making the
business deals here.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
But every popcorn thing and it's just so high risk,
high reward, which is how Tom Cruise lives his life.
But yeah, I would try that, and if I got
like three in a row, I would feel like I
was on the top of the on top of the world. Yeah,
I would be like taking out my eye like I would.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
It would be Jack doesn't do his own popcorn.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
I don't. I need somebody to step in for me. Yeah,
because it's not like throwing it up and catching it
in your mouth where it's like a nice lazy arc.
It's just an upward fastball.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
I don't have the patience to wait for it to
fall down. I need it in my mouth faster. Also,
I think the other surprising thing is that Tom Cruise
eats popcorn, which like I'm like, what, I would think
he would eat some sort of gray goo, you know.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Yeah, I think it's gray go. And then I mean
it is one thing that is still impossibly movie star
slash scientology like hyperbaric chamber of him is eating the
popcorn one piece at a time. Is like who has
that restraint? You know?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Yeah, I'm like that's that would be a bigger stunt
for me than learning how to ride a motorcycle.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Offic club. I'm like, yeah, yeah, I got it.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Whatever, But I'm like the popcorn, I can't wait. They're like, oh, cut,
go again.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
God, the people behind me would be getting pelted with
so many individual pieces of popcorn, because I'd also be
like in a panic to get more popcorn and off sweating.
You know, let's take a quick break and we'll be
right back breaking with me. I don't know. We're just
gonna have a normal adult conversation in a public place,
(14:15):
just because I think it's going to go so well
that I want other people to see how well it's
not all right?
Speaker 2 (14:20):
Cool?
Speaker 1 (14:30):
And we're back. And for some reason, during the break,
we started talking about Clint Eastwood movies, because that's like,
that is like an alpha move of throwing popcorn, and
it feels like east Wood. I feel like it's a
little too much work for Eastwood. Like Eastwood would eat
a single kernel at a time, but like kind of suspiciously.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
And but that's why his eyes are so squinty all
the time. He started to get popcorn in them.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
Yeah, just like one at a time and kind of
like without joy.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Yeahcorn with him randomly Yeah, yeah, like such one dimensional
female characters where they're like I hate you and then
all of it, all of a.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Sudden it turns into like lust when you want.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
To Secretly everybody wants to have sex with Clint Eastwood
no matter how old they are and how old he is.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
I know, I was like, like I could I watched
his movies because I like missed them or what like
they weren't in my zeitgeist, and so I was like, oh,
I should watch these as an adult to see what
the like cultural references. And it's literally just like Clint
Eastwood writing scripts of what he thinks is cool from
like probably when he was like a teen, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
Yeah, and also he like just can't stop having kids,
so it might not be that dissimilar from what.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
Oh really is he like that too?
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Yeah? Yeah, he just like walks into There's a very
funny podcast, The Action Boys, that covers Clint Eastwood movies
a lot, and they talk about how his sperm is
like airborne. You just like get in the same room
with them and like you be come pregnant.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
How many kids does he have?
Speaker 1 (16:02):
He is eight? But like he's still having them like
with people ninety.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Yeah ew ew.
Speaker 3 (16:10):
And he's married. He's been married like five times.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Yeah yeah. Gross.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
At least it says children at least.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Eight, at least eight that we know.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
There's no way to know.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
He's had numerous casual and series okay, yeah, many of
which have overlapped.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
Gross.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
This man will sit on any any woman and chairs
and any chairs at a Republican national conference.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
That's right, all right. There is a new survey that
The Guardian is covering that finds that almost half of
young people would prefer a world without internet. This is
a UK study that has found that nearly seventy percent
of sixteen to twenty one year olds feel worse about
themselves after spending time on social media, and half would
(17:00):
support a digital curfew that would restrict their access to
certain apps and sites past ten pm. Forty six percent
said they would rather be young in a world without
the Internet altogether.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
I'm going to be honest, it was fun growing up
with limited access to the internet. Like I had fun,
I went outside. I'm not necessarily saying it's better because
I wouldn't know that experience, but like I was just
thinking about all the crazy shit we did as kids,
and how it was like real interactive social stuff and
it was hard, like there was bullying and whatever, but
(17:33):
like we came up we made our own fun.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
We were like tepeeing houses.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
And shit, you know, yeah, we will.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Do that anymore. Do they do they do tp houses?
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Well, we have talked about how the two things that
have faced massive shortages are toilet paper and eggs, the
two things that we used to throw at people's houses.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Shit.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
So yeah, damn, these kids are growing up in a struggle.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
I never used to know.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
It's been bad for quietly retaliated against nemeses in middle school.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
There was also like a thing recently where they talked
about how people like our phones like tracked how many
selfies we would delete and then try to advertise like
beauty products to us.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Like yeah that makes sense, isn't that a thing?
Speaker 3 (18:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yeah, Like that's so gross. It's like they're literally squeezing
us for everything. And these are like kids like teens,
you know.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Yeah, and if your phone is just like subtly suggesting
to you that you need to fix the way you look,
like that can't be good.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
When you're a teenager. You need skincare.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
I'm like, this is crazy, it's yeah, and it feels
I do really feel like it's taken away a big
chunk of people's free will and that we're in a
much worse place than we realize. When it comes to
the amount of time, a quarter of respondents spent four
more hours a day on social media. Forty two percent
of those surveyed admitted to lying to their parents and
(18:57):
guardians about what they do online, and while I'm forty
two percent said that they had lied about their age.
Forty percent admitted to having a decoy or burner account.
I mean that stuff all seems pretty harmless. Uh. Twenty
seven percent said they pretend to be a different person completely.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
They're like, no, mom, I'm just jacking off in here.
I'm not looking at things to consume. I swear to God,
I swear to God, I'm just jerking it. I'm just
jerking it to the friend of yours. But I'm not
trying to buy more shit, I promise.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
It. Yeah. I just I think boredom is underrated, you know.
I think like having to make your own fun and
just like come up with shit and not always have
an option that is going to distract you and occupy
your brain with something that has been like market tested
to divert you and give you an idea that like
steers you towards consumption. Like I feel like in a
(19:50):
very obvious way that is it would be preferable to
not exist online.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, I mean, I like it is good for like
being aware of like political issues and like if you
can get outside of your bubble, which a lot of
people can't online. But I also feel like there's not
enough like interaction with like human beings when you're trying
to like solve a problem for like critical thinking, Like
it used to be we have a question and you'd
be like, well, do you think it's this or that?
Speaker 3 (20:16):
And like we wouldn't immediately go to our phones.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
Right, but we're kind of what is it called like
offloading or substituting outsourcing outsourcing, Yeah, logic to like AI
or whatever. Yeah, so even even now, like yeah, you
can look it up, but do you know like the
sources correct. I don't even think we have necessarily the
talk it out skills that we used to.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
You know, I definitely don't have the talk it out
skills that I used to have. I'm fortunately just have
an AI script writer that writes everything that I say,
so in your brain, in my brain.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Yeah, and planning and in black situation.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
That's the one place that I trust Elon Musk. I
think he's off base on a lot of stuff, but
I do trust him to implanting a chip into my
brain to help me google things in my brain.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Here's a crazy thing. I don't know if this is
bad to say, but I went to college with someone
who's like third in line at Neuralink.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Wow, in line, like in the leadership, in line to
get the thing put no, no.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
No in leader like he's at he's been at the
company since we like graduated.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (21:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
So I'm like, I'm I'm very curious, like what the
internal because a lot of like, like I worked on
neural probes in my Masters and the idea was to
implant a probe to help a prosthetic move by you
thinking right, so like amputees and stuff. But like with Neuralink,
I'm like, what else are they doing up there? And
then like because initially when it came out, I was like, Oh,
(21:47):
that's cool. They're like trying to do a similar thing,
you know, assist people who have don't have like access
to movement or whatever.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Yeah, but it's tough.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Yeah, I feel like that. Do you know back in
the days when before all tech had just like gone
down this like a dark fascist libertarian directions optimized, Yeah,
I was like optimistic. I was like, that's cool, Like
it's going to be enable us to like create new senses.
Like it not just like helps people who have lost
(22:19):
certain senses, but like, you know, it could enable us
to like have feeds that like enable us you.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Know, biomimicry stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Yeah. So suddenly like you're just trailed by a drone
that gives you like a bird's eye view of everything
around you and it's like goes directly into your brain
or like something. You know, that stuff all seemed like cool,
and now it just feels like, no, they'd find a
way to like fuck with you that.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
They monitor your head.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Yeah, yeah, exactly. And speaking of monetization, Trump's pick to
head the IRS, Billy Long is it's just like I
don't I don't even note, Like I guess I just
feel like we have to keep talking about this shit
because it's so openly corrupt. But he is somebody who
(23:09):
like has told business executives like that he's going to
give them tax breaks, like they're just he's like, they're like, yeah,
I mean this is gonna be great. He's like making
sure that we never like he's giving them these passes
that are basically like I'm audit proof because of this
guy who and like the way they're like talking about
(23:30):
they're just speaking openly on these like recorded zoom calls
and just being like, yeah, it's pretty crazy. Uh. I
call up one of my friends and I say, Hey,
the IRS Commissioner Billy Long, the new one coming in
that we're all excited about. Is Billy coming too the inauguration?
My friend says, well, he doesn't have a ticket. He's
(23:51):
not because he's not confirmed yet. And I said, well,
make him my guest. And then he goes on to
say they had one dinner, spent a few nights together, and.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
That he it was a whirlwind romance.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
What yeah, exactly. And then he said that he was
told that his company companies would no longer have to
worry about IRS scrutiny on like certain subjects because like
specifically these employee retention tax credits, which the IRS was
thinking about shutting down the quote. Is he actually pushed
(24:27):
erc the employee retention credits? Is that not a blessing?
We could be worried about promoter audits now, we could
be worried about anything with the old administration, but Billy
actually is now taking over and we don't have to
worry about that stuff.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
So it's just like the rich have nothing to fear
but fear itself.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Yes, exactly, like literally, and we don't even have to
fear fear itself because we have all the good pharmaceuticals.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Like in this meeting, he's like I had to tell
the guy, please take your sales hat off and put
your IRS commissioner hat on.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
That insane dude, Like you're not trying.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
To sell me anything. You're you're the IRS commissioner. You
can't be like constantly like trying to win my business
as the IRS commissioner.
Speaker 3 (25:11):
That's so crazy.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
That's so crazy that people think self regulation would ever work,
like exactly.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
Anyways, good world that we have here, Paula. The always
a pleasure having you. Where can people find you? Follow you?
All that good stuff?
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Dallas, Sunday May twenty fifth, nine pm, Dallas Comedy Club.
Speaker 3 (25:31):
Please come out.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
Please tell everybody please buy tickets. If you come out,
I will say hi after the show and me at
Paula Veganolan p A l A v I g U
n A l A N. I also run a show
at the Comedy Store monthly called Facial Recognition Comedy with
my friends. We had bought some usufon on Friday, which
is crazy. Yeah, he's so sweet, so smart and so fun.
(25:54):
But yeah, I don't know if we're gonna have a
June show, but we are gonna have a July show,
so come through.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
The shows are always so great. Everybody should be going monthly.
And please, if you're in Dallas, zeigang pull up show
Polly's Love. That is going to do it for us
this afternoon. We are back tomorrow with a whole last
episode of the show. Until then, be kind to each other,
be kind to yourselves. Get your vaccines while you still
(26:19):
can goward them. Yeah for real, so go get your
flu shots. Don't do nothing about white supremacy, and we
will talk to y'all tomorrow. Bye bye bye.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
The Daily Zeit Guys is executive produced by Catherine.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
Law, co produced by Bae Wayne, co produced by Victor
Wright
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Co written by j M McNabb and edited and engineered
by Brian Jefferies.
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Miles Gray
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