July 22, 2024 • 24 mins
The last time Gary was in his childhood home he was 15 years old. Manny takes Gary on a tour of the house that has been virtually untouched since 1998.
Stand-Up Tour Dates:https://punchup.live/garyvider
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Previously on number one.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Dad, have you seen the house lightly?
Speaker 1 (00:04):
You still have the house? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (00:05):
Yeah, I don't plan on getting rid of it.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
So yeah, tomorrow's the day I am going to meet
my dad after all this time. What do you think
about that? I honestly never thought that I would ever
witness this. The recorder is in my bag with the mic.
Thinking out of my bag, I have that which is
wednsing so well. I love how proud you are a
little late. I'm sorry, just pay you said when the
(00:30):
horse is over. That's why I could get Kobe back.
I never got to see my dog.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Aye, I'm glad you're telling me now, which I can
tell you. I'm sorry. He would have probably have been
better off with you than with me.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
All right, Bet, it's a great dog.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
I'm not pushing you into anything, but I'll see you again.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
I want to see you again.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
I think you know Dave my day. I'm here to
talk about my life and you're a voice in that.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Look.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
I got to be honest with you.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
It feels like I'm setting myself up for a fall.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
After I secretly recorded the first meeting with my father
at the Second Avenue Deli, I ended up telling him
all about the podcast, but he had a ton of concerns.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
I'm looking to show that you're an interesting person. You're
a person that I haven't talked to you in twenty
four years. But what's the reason for that, you know,
and like what is the reason for that? Can you
show it in something like that?
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Well?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Will that tell somebody? Well, that's what'll That's what I
want to talk to you about. You know, it's like
a lot of history. So it's like you know, piecing
together things you know we've gone through. Right, Okay, let
me ask you something. Yeah, do you plan on using
this with anybody else? What do you mean side of
(01:52):
your podcast? What do you mean using it with anybody else?
By that, like, we'll you using it in any way
to hurt me or like like problems, legal problems or anything. No,
it's to make a podcast. That's what this is for.
The next step is to go to the house to
(02:12):
just you know, walk around.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Okay, but no video, no cameras, no pictures.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Yeah I wouldn't be doing that, okay, but yeah, I'm.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Just telling you there's no leeway there.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
So you let me search you if I want to.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
For a camera for anything.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Make sure you still get your balls. Yeah. No, yeah.
Is there something you want to take away with you
when you come? Is that part of your plan. There's
no part of my plan.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
But I mean, if you did have the Adam gravestick,
I would take that back. In nineteen ninety four, the
New York Rangers were playing the Quebec Nordis and this
would be the first time my dad and I ever
ran our SI for Kids scam for a Rangers game.
So the Rangers would go on to win, and my
dad and I go into locker room so I can
interview the players. They had a great team that would
(02:58):
go on to win the Stanley Cup that year, and
one of their star players was Adam Graves. Graves ended
up giving me his game stick and even signed it.
I was beside myself. What also made this night so
memorable was there was a terrible snowstorm in New York,
so my dad and I were forced to stay in
the city. I still have the image ingrained my head
(03:19):
of him fast talking the employee at the front desk
of the hotel Pennsylvania to get the lowest possible rate.
Of course, he succeeded. I remember lying in bed did
Adam Graves stick next to me, thinking what a cool night?
And I guess the stick helps cherish this memory a
little bit. Also, it would look pretty cool in my
son's room.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
I don't have any control here. It's all in your hands.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
So would you.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Mind meeting with my attorney and signing some papers if.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
We need it? Do you have a fun with that? Okay,
that's fine, Okay, all right, listen me. Can I tell
you something? Yeah? I love you. I've always loved you.
It's nothing that in my power. If it's reasonable that
I wouldn't do for you, just understand that you'd be
(04:08):
able to come into the house and see your room. Okay, Yeah,
and we'll talk.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
This is number one dad.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Testing one two test test test testing. All right, I
am in my old neighborhood. I am about to go
into my house. This is pretty wild. I haven't been
here here and since I was fifteen, that's when I
left to go to boarding school and I never came back.
(04:53):
Then we'll say if he actually lets me in, I
don't know. There we go, m hm hm.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Does it looks the same?
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Looks a little? I mean it looks very similar. Yeah,
I mean the stuff here and yeah, I'll mike you up.
What I'll mike you up.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
I'm not going to talk financeers some money about it.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
No, it's fun. Just leave out whatever you don't want. Okay,
that's good. Yeah, I just don't talk about anything you don't.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Want to talk about, Like the length of my penis No.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Yeah, you don't want people to know that it's a
quarter of an inch.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
All right, quarter of an inch.
Speaker 4 (05:59):
So this is how a father and son from Long
Island reunite over dick jokes.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Yeah, hold on, hold on one second, hold on. What
I want you to do is I want you to
make a statement for me. Got a record that this
is part of the podcast and whatever is being said
here could be exaggerated for the purposes of entertainment. Entertainment,
(06:25):
strictly for the purposes of entertainment.
Speaker 4 (06:27):
Before my father would let me in the house, he
made me record a video to make sure he was
covered from any potential legal blowback. That's my dad. He
knows how to cover his ass.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Okay, you introduce yourself, man, all right, look at you.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
You look so handsome, my boy.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Okay, thanks, well, anyway, here we are. My name's Gary
Veter we're doing a podcast with my father or insure
yourself right there, there you go. Let's see that we
look alike. And this podcast we're doing, it's for entertainment,
basic ideas to depict the history of my childhood and
(07:06):
my relationship with my father.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
What's that I'm number one, number one dead and the name.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Of the podcast is number one Dad there.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Yeah, I'm happy to be here with my son.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
It's been twenty four years since we've had any real
communication between us, and I want to say that wasn't
because of me.
Speaker 4 (07:29):
It's pretty crazy to hear stuff like that from my father.
He still doesn't get the role he pleaded in us
not speaking all these years, that he's the reason our
family is no longer a family. I wanted to tell
him all this right then and there, but I also
didn't want him to pull the plug on me going
through the house, so I decided it was best to
tread lightly.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Hey.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
You know, whenever I had an idea, when I said
I wanted to meet somebody.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Yeah, I pulled it off. Do you recall that? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Do you remember the room that we met Jordan's and
it was him and the coach Til Jackson was in there,
assistant coach.
Speaker 3 (08:06):
It was like a private room where they let him
just relax by himself. Yeah, but he was sitting on
a fucking hard bench. It wasn't like an ice recliner.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
No, he was just in there. He was just like
shooting the ship with.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
See these bikes, you know what I do with them?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
I fix them and I give them to local kids.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
It's the bikes, the bike story, the part that's fabricated
and all of this.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
The podcasts. They of a good next to the truth. Buses
here the school buses. If they stop, you can't go
buy them.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Yeah, you have to.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
The time, Well, they got a camera.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Okay, I know it makes sense.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
I got a two hundred dollars ticket.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Oh really, I'll tell you.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
But I'm fighting it.
Speaker 3 (08:42):
They said, I rolled by the camera. The fucking picture
shows these breake lights are on. Yeah, you can't take
me and tell me I'm rolling by. Well, my brakes
are on.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Yeah that's good, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
So I'm going to court over you fuck them. I
fight every thing.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
I know two things you told me. One thing, never
admit your guilt. And the other thing you told me
was that if you ever see this was in connection
with more so like when we would sneak into the
movie theater. If you ever see, you know, a father
doing something for his kid, don't call him out on it.
(09:22):
Let him get through with it, because they're doing something
for their family and maybe they don't have the means
to provide exactly right.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
When you're raised by a con man, you grow up
with some life lessons that are definitely a little different.
As we walked from the front of the house to
the side, I looked up and saw my old treehouse
still intact, and it brought back tons of happy memories
of my sisters and me going down the slide and
swinging from the monkey bars. I couldn't believe he was
still there, come up.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
Here going into the house. That he was my key
let me see.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Thank you for doing this. This you know means a lot.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
Well, Hey, I did it because when you first asked,
I said I would do it, and then, uh, you know,
I told you I met with my lawyer. He had
some reservations about me doing this.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
But okay, step over here.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
Okay, Oh wow, that picture which one right there? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That one was taken in Pennsylvania. We were near a
wood covered bridge.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Was there right next to me. Is there there's another picture.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
There's another picture. Go climb over there, squeeze through, you
can fit through.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Jesus Christ.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
Their boxes everywhere, just like my family life growing up.
The house is an absolute mess. Honestly, it looks like
nothing has been grown out in twenty four years.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
We move those move that big blue box. So I
know what you're talking about.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
It could see the picture.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
What is that picture?
Speaker 1 (11:08):
It's Jamie and Danny and uh this is their Sada Israel.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
It's Missada. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Yeah, I don't want you to get pissed. I don't
show too many pictures of you. It's not intentional. But
you did write me off.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
So did all your other children.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Yeah, well you know that was their choice, not mine.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Well, you know everything, you know I you know, you're
an adult. You have to realize that if if everybody
or a lot of your family don't want to talk
to you, maybe it's not them, maybe it's maybe it's
of course it's me.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Who else going to be?
Speaker 4 (11:49):
This conversation with my father was how all conversations my
entire childhood would go. You never really got the healthy
resolution you were looking for. Well, I tried to convey
that he's the one respect for the disconnect in our family.
He's never been able to take full accountability.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
You got a lot of stuff here. You ain't seen
ship yet, boy, But I remember this is the gate that's.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Still that was for Kobe yet. Yeah, you got chewed
by Kobe.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:18):
Not only did my house look almost exactly the same
the gate we used for my dog, Kobe still had
his teeth marks in it. I don't know if my
father kept the gate up for sentimental reasons or pure laziness.
But of all the things I'd seen so far, this
hit me the hardest.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
It's a great picture of me playing hockey.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
You forgot about that picture? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:38):
I don't remember it.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Yeah, you don't want to remember it because it has
to do with me. Come on up, bubblo, What do.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
You call me that? B Yeah, they're not at that.
Our relationship isn't isn't that? You know? I think it's uh?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
What is work in progress? What is bubbla mean?
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Blah blah? I don't know. I guess this is your
since your term.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
It's an term of endearment when you're a little boy
growing up.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
We walked up to my old bedroom and all my
old stuff was still on the walls.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Oh yeah, the post there.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Yeah, coime, here, this is what you did.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
You were pissed at me, so I told you you
ripped a hole in Yeah, yeah, right, that's where you were.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
That's where I was. You remember doing that?
Speaker 1 (13:26):
I do? Yeah, it's yeah. Oh wow, Okay, I give
us the Sully these cards. Yeah, if you want to,
it's up to you. I didn't open that up. It's
probably get that. Some great holes actually have a gun.
There's gum in here, that's how old it is.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Thanks.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
I was definitely I'm going to give us. What is
this picture? That's amazing?
Speaker 3 (13:56):
What's amazing? Did I get the voice from your mother?
And I wanted to hold on to a lot of things?
Speaker 1 (14:02):
I mean, it's no, it's just I mean, what do you.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Think I wrote? You guys off like, well.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
I mean, this isn't keeping things to to what to
like a high you know quality. I mean a lot
of it's hoarding. But the fact that you hoarded so
much stuff is actually great.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
By the way, did you ever get the checks that
I was sending you for child support? Or your mother
told you she never got child support?
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Did she say that too?
Speaker 1 (14:29):
I have no idea of what if I was getting anything.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
Made me.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Send child support payments and I sent it to how
always in a check, no cash, So I can't say, well, Gary,
I gave a cash. There were always checks and she
had to sign for them. So you know, I'm just
telling you so a lot of things you may have heard.
Nobody ever came back to me for a rebuttal and say, hey,
(14:58):
did this really happen? Do you like your pictures up there?
You remember that plaque I got you?
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Which one right in front of you?
Speaker 1 (15:04):
This? Yeah, I don't remember you getting it for me,
but I don't rember it in my room.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
I got it.
Speaker 3 (15:11):
I made a trade with somebody at his or you
remember where I used to have your skate shopping.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
He was selling them favor for a favor. That day,
just what happened.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
His phone wasn't working, so I fixed it and he said,
what do you want how much?
Speaker 2 (15:28):
So give me that plaque.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
It was amazing how many times somebody's phone wouldn't work
and we would be able to get some free stuff
out of the deal.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah. Did you ever think you'd see this day?
Speaker 3 (15:41):
Honestly, that you'd be back in your room?
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Did I know I didn't.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
I know you said you wanted to take the Adam gravestick.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
Yeah, I mean if you don't. If you but that man.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Belongs to you, of course I'll let you. And I'm
not here to hold anything over your head. Hey, let
me just tell you one thing right now. This is
not the.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Last time you're coming back to look for things.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
All right, okay, thank you? Just don't think a piece
of gum? Can I have it? You know what it is?
What is it? It's a trick. Huh, it's a trick.
This is a trick.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
Piece of gum. You take it out.
Speaker 2 (16:31):
And it snaps your finger.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
Yeah, don't give it to uh Sullivan, I'd love it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Is he talking?
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Uh? Yeah, he talks and smart kid.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
Good.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
This is nuts here.
Speaker 4 (16:50):
I am standing in my child's bedroom talking to my
father about my son, his grandson he's never met. I
went into this whole thing not really knowing how would
feel talking to my dad about Sully. But in that moment,
I just felt he didn't deserve to hear that much.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Let me ask her something.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Everything that you were told during and just before the divorce,
did you believe everything you heard?
Speaker 1 (17:27):
I mean, you don't understand. I also lived in this environment,
so I wasn't too fond of you while I was
living through stuff. And you know, I mean it goes
back to when I was growing up. I was put
in the middle of everything that you were going through
(17:50):
with my mom. Everything. You'd get angry and you'd be like,
open up the door so the dog would run away
like that the individual.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Was that the reason I did that or was it
because nobody wanted to walk the dog.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Nobody wanted to walk the dog. The dog one I
would always walk the dog. And also I am thirteen
fourteen years old at the time, where it's like, if
nobody wants to walk the dog, the solution isn't opening
up the door. That the dog that everybody loved.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Which was wrong. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
And then when it came down to when you guys
were divorcing and the process was taking a long time,
I asked you if I could have the dog, and
if you remember.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
You said, after the divorce, yeah, reminded me.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
You're right, and then I never did send my dog again.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Well things happened.
Speaker 4 (18:42):
I'm aware how much I keep bringing up my dog Kobe,
but being in my old house brought all those memories back.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
So your question, I mean we did all this stuff. Yeah,
do you feel like going to these games? Do you
feel that you did it all for me? When we
would go to Madison Square Garden? Was that for me
or for you?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
It was? Everything was for you. I wanted you to
have some memories.
Speaker 4 (19:11):
You know, asking my father did he do this for me?
Or was it for him? Isn't exactly right because after
everything I've learned, I realized it's not an either or situation.
All those times we stuck into the garden, I think
he did it for me and for him.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Can I take this only if you want me to
have it?
Speaker 3 (19:30):
Well, it's a stick, but more than you having the
stick and me giving it to you is a gift
I want you as my son.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
Well, time will tell I'm not I'm not guaranteeing anything,
but I'm not going to cut you off cold turkey
or anything like that if that's what you're worried about.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
And what if your sisters get on your case for this?
Speaker 1 (19:54):
And I mean it doesn't have anything to do with them.
You know, you say so, but you know, like you
giving me a stick is like that's an appreciation because
I went in with the idea that to me a
lot of our relationship and what I deemed it was
(20:16):
you keeping Kobe over my head, and I felt that's
what you were going to be doing with the hockey stick,
even though the hockey stick never meant anything close to
what Kobe meant to me. It was just symbolic, and
Grandma and Grandpa meant a lot more to me than
(20:36):
everything else.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
And I don't know if you wanted to hurt them
because of me, but if you did, it was the
wrong thing to do, and it was a big mistake.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
And you know, maybe not now later you'll understand that.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Well, my intention was never to hurt them. My intention
was I just wasn't in any state of mind to
see you. And everything that happened at May is one thing,
but them is another thing. Yeah, Well tell that, you know,
to you know, a kid who's going through this as
a teenager, there's a lot of hate in their heart
(21:15):
when you know, Kobe is the thing that I love
more than anything. When I was growing up in this house,
there is there's times that there was laughter, but there's
also times where the cops would be called, not because
somebody was getting beaten, but the verbal arguments, whether.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
You called or she called, she didn't give a fuck.
She wanted to put me in jail.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
When I saw what I was dealing with at that point, well,
gloves were off.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I was going to do everything I can to hurt it.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
Why are you telling me this that none of this matters.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
Because you're telling me about why everybody hates me.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
I'm not telling you why I bade. I'm telling you
about why I wasn't talking to you for so long
and all right relationship because.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
You were told shit.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
That's why a lot of shit that you were told
was shit.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
You're saying that I wasso ship, but I'm saying about
how you treated me. That's what way I treated you.
Was not.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
There to intentionally hurt you. Never. I mean, when you
you know, if you think if you think that.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
He did the stuff about the dog, and okay, I did.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
This stuff about the dog, but unfortunately Kobe's not here.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
I had him to he was seventeen years old. Okay,
he had a good life. He fucking slept with me
every night, yeah, on the bed.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Yeah, and I would have loved to have had my dog.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
This is the most honest conversation I've ever had with
my father. Since the start of this whole journey, I'd
always envision getting to ask him the same questions I'd
asked everyone else.
Speaker 1 (22:38):
Was he always like this?
Speaker 4 (22:39):
What drove him to live his life this way? Well,
here I am, and now's my chance. But would he
be willing to open up? This is a guy whose
life is built on lies, and I was finally going
to ask him to tell the truth. On the next
episode of Number One Dad.
Speaker 2 (22:59):
All about delusion like a magician.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
I was a magician in the furniture business.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
What was the downfall of Designers Gallery?
Speaker 2 (23:07):
New York State Attorney General?
Speaker 3 (23:11):
I said, if I don't call you back for bullshit
in five minutes down nine one wanted Tom to come.
Speaker 2 (23:17):
To the thinkers.
Speaker 3 (23:17):
I'm getting locked in a freezer somewhere.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
So why not just pay your bill?
Speaker 3 (23:21):
Because I was a greedy fuck and I wanted the
money and I wanted it now.
Speaker 4 (23:33):
Number One Dad is a production of Radio Point, Big
Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts, created and hosted by
Gary Veeter.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Executive producers are.
Speaker 4 (23:42):
Gary Veeter, Adam Lowett, Alex Bach, Daniel Powell, Houston Snyder,
Kenneth Slotnik, and Brian Stern, written by Gary Veeter and
Adam Lowett, Produced by Bernie Kaminski. Co producer is Taylor Kowalski,
Edited and mixed by Ian Sortino at Little Bear Audio.
Recording Engineer Is kat Iosa. Original music by Andrew Gross.
(24:04):
Special thanks to Charlotte DeAnda. Jonathan karsh Is creative consultant.
Executive producers for Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts
are Will Farrell Hansani and Olivia Aguilar. Sound services were
provided by Great City Posts.
Previously on number one.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Dad, have you seen the house lightly?
Speaker 1 (00:04):
You still have the house? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (00:05):
Yeah, I don't plan on getting rid of it.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
So yeah, tomorrow's the day I am going to meet
my dad after all this time. What do you think
about that? I honestly never thought that I would ever
witness this. The recorder is in my bag with the mic.
Thinking out of my bag, I have that which is
wednsing so well. I love how proud you are a
little late. I'm sorry, just pay you said when the
(00:30):
horse is over. That's why I could get Kobe back.
I never got to see my dog.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Aye, I'm glad you're telling me now, which I can
tell you. I'm sorry. He would have probably have been
better off with you than with me.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
All right, Bet, it's a great dog.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
I'm not pushing you into anything, but I'll see you again.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
I want to see you again.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
I think you know Dave my day. I'm here to
talk about my life and you're a voice in that.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Look.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
I got to be honest with you.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
It feels like I'm setting myself up for a fall.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
After I secretly recorded the first meeting with my father
at the Second Avenue Deli, I ended up telling him
all about the podcast, but he had a ton of concerns.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
I'm looking to show that you're an interesting person. You're
a person that I haven't talked to you in twenty
four years. But what's the reason for that, you know,
and like what is the reason for that? Can you
show it in something like that?
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Well?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Will that tell somebody? Well, that's what'll That's what I
want to talk to you about. You know, it's like
a lot of history. So it's like you know, piecing
together things you know we've gone through. Right, Okay, let
me ask you something. Yeah, do you plan on using
this with anybody else? What do you mean side of
(01:52):
your podcast? What do you mean using it with anybody else?
By that, like, we'll you using it in any way
to hurt me or like like problems, legal problems or anything. No,
it's to make a podcast. That's what this is for.
The next step is to go to the house to
(02:12):
just you know, walk around.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Okay, but no video, no cameras, no pictures.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Yeah I wouldn't be doing that, okay, but yeah, I'm.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Just telling you there's no leeway there.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
So you let me search you if I want to.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
For a camera for anything.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Make sure you still get your balls. Yeah. No, yeah.
Is there something you want to take away with you
when you come? Is that part of your plan. There's
no part of my plan.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
But I mean, if you did have the Adam gravestick,
I would take that back. In nineteen ninety four, the
New York Rangers were playing the Quebec Nordis and this
would be the first time my dad and I ever
ran our SI for Kids scam for a Rangers game.
So the Rangers would go on to win, and my
dad and I go into locker room so I can
interview the players. They had a great team that would
(02:58):
go on to win the Stanley Cup that year, and
one of their star players was Adam Graves. Graves ended
up giving me his game stick and even signed it.
I was beside myself. What also made this night so
memorable was there was a terrible snowstorm in New York,
so my dad and I were forced to stay in
the city. I still have the image ingrained my head
(03:19):
of him fast talking the employee at the front desk
of the hotel Pennsylvania to get the lowest possible rate.
Of course, he succeeded. I remember lying in bed did
Adam Graves stick next to me, thinking what a cool night?
And I guess the stick helps cherish this memory a
little bit. Also, it would look pretty cool in my
son's room.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
I don't have any control here. It's all in your hands.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
So would you.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Mind meeting with my attorney and signing some papers if.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
We need it? Do you have a fun with that? Okay,
that's fine, Okay, all right, listen me. Can I tell
you something? Yeah? I love you. I've always loved you.
It's nothing that in my power. If it's reasonable that
I wouldn't do for you, just understand that you'd be
(04:08):
able to come into the house and see your room. Okay, Yeah,
and we'll talk.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
This is number one dad.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Testing one two test test test testing. All right, I
am in my old neighborhood. I am about to go
into my house. This is pretty wild. I haven't been
here here and since I was fifteen, that's when I
left to go to boarding school and I never came back.
(04:53):
Then we'll say if he actually lets me in, I
don't know. There we go, m hm hm.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Does it looks the same?
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Looks a little? I mean it looks very similar. Yeah,
I mean the stuff here and yeah, I'll mike you up.
What I'll mike you up.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
I'm not going to talk financeers some money about it.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
No, it's fun. Just leave out whatever you don't want. Okay,
that's good. Yeah, I just don't talk about anything you don't.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Want to talk about, Like the length of my penis No.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Yeah, you don't want people to know that it's a
quarter of an inch.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
All right, quarter of an inch.
Speaker 4 (05:59):
So this is how a father and son from Long
Island reunite over dick jokes.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Yeah, hold on, hold on one second, hold on. What
I want you to do is I want you to
make a statement for me. Got a record that this
is part of the podcast and whatever is being said
here could be exaggerated for the purposes of entertainment. Entertainment,
(06:25):
strictly for the purposes of entertainment.
Speaker 4 (06:27):
Before my father would let me in the house, he
made me record a video to make sure he was
covered from any potential legal blowback. That's my dad. He
knows how to cover his ass.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Okay, you introduce yourself, man, all right, look at you.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
You look so handsome, my boy.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Okay, thanks, well, anyway, here we are. My name's Gary
Veter we're doing a podcast with my father or insure
yourself right there, there you go. Let's see that we
look alike. And this podcast we're doing, it's for entertainment,
basic ideas to depict the history of my childhood and
(07:06):
my relationship with my father.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
What's that I'm number one, number one dead and the name.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Of the podcast is number one Dad there.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Yeah, I'm happy to be here with my son.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
It's been twenty four years since we've had any real
communication between us, and I want to say that wasn't
because of me.
Speaker 4 (07:29):
It's pretty crazy to hear stuff like that from my father.
He still doesn't get the role he pleaded in us
not speaking all these years, that he's the reason our
family is no longer a family. I wanted to tell
him all this right then and there, but I also
didn't want him to pull the plug on me going
through the house, so I decided it was best to
tread lightly.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Hey.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
You know, whenever I had an idea, when I said
I wanted to meet somebody.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Yeah, I pulled it off. Do you recall that? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Do you remember the room that we met Jordan's and
it was him and the coach Til Jackson was in there,
assistant coach.
Speaker 3 (08:06):
It was like a private room where they let him
just relax by himself. Yeah, but he was sitting on
a fucking hard bench. It wasn't like an ice recliner.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
No, he was just in there. He was just like
shooting the ship with.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
See these bikes, you know what I do with them?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
I fix them and I give them to local kids.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
It's the bikes, the bike story, the part that's fabricated
and all of this.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
The podcasts. They of a good next to the truth. Buses
here the school buses. If they stop, you can't go
buy them.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Yeah, you have to.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
The time, Well, they got a camera.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Okay, I know it makes sense.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
I got a two hundred dollars ticket.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Oh really, I'll tell you.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
But I'm fighting it.
Speaker 3 (08:42):
They said, I rolled by the camera. The fucking picture
shows these breake lights are on. Yeah, you can't take
me and tell me I'm rolling by. Well, my brakes
are on.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Yeah that's good, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
So I'm going to court over you fuck them. I
fight every thing.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
I know two things you told me. One thing, never
admit your guilt. And the other thing you told me
was that if you ever see this was in connection
with more so like when we would sneak into the
movie theater. If you ever see, you know, a father
doing something for his kid, don't call him out on it.
(09:22):
Let him get through with it, because they're doing something
for their family and maybe they don't have the means
to provide exactly right.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
When you're raised by a con man, you grow up
with some life lessons that are definitely a little different.
As we walked from the front of the house to
the side, I looked up and saw my old treehouse
still intact, and it brought back tons of happy memories
of my sisters and me going down the slide and
swinging from the monkey bars. I couldn't believe he was
still there, come up.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
Here going into the house. That he was my key
let me see.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Thank you for doing this. This you know means a lot.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
Well, Hey, I did it because when you first asked,
I said I would do it, and then, uh, you know,
I told you I met with my lawyer. He had
some reservations about me doing this.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
But okay, step over here.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
Okay, Oh wow, that picture which one right there? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That one was taken in Pennsylvania. We were near a
wood covered bridge.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Was there right next to me. Is there there's another picture.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
There's another picture. Go climb over there, squeeze through, you
can fit through.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Jesus Christ.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
Their boxes everywhere, just like my family life growing up.
The house is an absolute mess. Honestly, it looks like
nothing has been grown out in twenty four years.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
We move those move that big blue box. So I
know what you're talking about.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
It could see the picture.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
What is that picture?
Speaker 1 (11:08):
It's Jamie and Danny and uh this is their Sada Israel.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
It's Missada. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Yeah, I don't want you to get pissed. I don't
show too many pictures of you. It's not intentional. But
you did write me off.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
So did all your other children.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Yeah, well you know that was their choice, not mine.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Well, you know everything, you know I you know, you're
an adult. You have to realize that if if everybody
or a lot of your family don't want to talk
to you, maybe it's not them, maybe it's maybe it's
of course it's me.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Who else going to be?
Speaker 4 (11:49):
This conversation with my father was how all conversations my
entire childhood would go. You never really got the healthy
resolution you were looking for. Well, I tried to convey
that he's the one respect for the disconnect in our family.
He's never been able to take full accountability.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
You got a lot of stuff here. You ain't seen
ship yet, boy, But I remember this is the gate that's.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Still that was for Kobe yet. Yeah, you got chewed
by Kobe.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:18):
Not only did my house look almost exactly the same
the gate we used for my dog, Kobe still had
his teeth marks in it. I don't know if my
father kept the gate up for sentimental reasons or pure laziness.
But of all the things I'd seen so far, this
hit me the hardest.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
It's a great picture of me playing hockey.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
You forgot about that picture? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:38):
I don't remember it.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Yeah, you don't want to remember it because it has
to do with me. Come on up, bubblo, What do.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
You call me that? B Yeah, they're not at that.
Our relationship isn't isn't that? You know? I think it's uh?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
What is work in progress? What is bubbla mean?
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Blah blah? I don't know. I guess this is your
since your term.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
It's an term of endearment when you're a little boy
growing up.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
We walked up to my old bedroom and all my
old stuff was still on the walls.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Oh yeah, the post there.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Yeah, coime, here, this is what you did.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
You were pissed at me, so I told you you
ripped a hole in Yeah, yeah, right, that's where you were.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
That's where I was. You remember doing that?
Speaker 1 (13:26):
I do? Yeah, it's yeah. Oh wow, Okay, I give
us the Sully these cards. Yeah, if you want to,
it's up to you. I didn't open that up. It's
probably get that. Some great holes actually have a gun.
There's gum in here, that's how old it is.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Thanks.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
I was definitely I'm going to give us. What is
this picture? That's amazing?
Speaker 3 (13:56):
What's amazing? Did I get the voice from your mother?
And I wanted to hold on to a lot of things?
Speaker 1 (14:02):
I mean, it's no, it's just I mean, what do you.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Think I wrote? You guys off like, well.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
I mean, this isn't keeping things to to what to
like a high you know quality. I mean a lot
of it's hoarding. But the fact that you hoarded so
much stuff is actually great.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
By the way, did you ever get the checks that
I was sending you for child support? Or your mother
told you she never got child support?
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Did she say that too?
Speaker 1 (14:29):
I have no idea of what if I was getting anything.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
Made me.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Send child support payments and I sent it to how
always in a check, no cash, So I can't say, well, Gary,
I gave a cash. There were always checks and she
had to sign for them. So you know, I'm just
telling you so a lot of things you may have heard.
Nobody ever came back to me for a rebuttal and say, hey,
(14:58):
did this really happen? Do you like your pictures up there?
You remember that plaque I got you?
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Which one right in front of you?
Speaker 1 (15:04):
This? Yeah, I don't remember you getting it for me,
but I don't rember it in my room.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
I got it.
Speaker 3 (15:11):
I made a trade with somebody at his or you
remember where I used to have your skate shopping.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
He was selling them favor for a favor. That day,
just what happened.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
His phone wasn't working, so I fixed it and he said,
what do you want how much?
Speaker 2 (15:28):
So give me that plaque.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
It was amazing how many times somebody's phone wouldn't work
and we would be able to get some free stuff
out of the deal.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah. Did you ever think you'd see this day?
Speaker 3 (15:41):
Honestly, that you'd be back in your room?
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Did I know I didn't.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
I know you said you wanted to take the Adam gravestick.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
Yeah, I mean if you don't. If you but that man.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Belongs to you, of course I'll let you. And I'm
not here to hold anything over your head. Hey, let
me just tell you one thing right now. This is
not the.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Last time you're coming back to look for things.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
All right, okay, thank you? Just don't think a piece
of gum? Can I have it? You know what it is?
What is it? It's a trick. Huh, it's a trick.
This is a trick.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
Piece of gum. You take it out.
Speaker 2 (16:31):
And it snaps your finger.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
Yeah, don't give it to uh Sullivan, I'd love it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Is he talking?
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Uh? Yeah, he talks and smart kid.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
Good.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
This is nuts here.
Speaker 4 (16:50):
I am standing in my child's bedroom talking to my
father about my son, his grandson he's never met. I
went into this whole thing not really knowing how would
feel talking to my dad about Sully. But in that moment,
I just felt he didn't deserve to hear that much.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Let me ask her something.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Everything that you were told during and just before the divorce,
did you believe everything you heard?
Speaker 1 (17:27):
I mean, you don't understand. I also lived in this environment,
so I wasn't too fond of you while I was
living through stuff. And you know, I mean it goes
back to when I was growing up. I was put
in the middle of everything that you were going through
(17:50):
with my mom. Everything. You'd get angry and you'd be like,
open up the door so the dog would run away
like that the individual.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Was that the reason I did that or was it
because nobody wanted to walk the dog.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Nobody wanted to walk the dog. The dog one I
would always walk the dog. And also I am thirteen
fourteen years old at the time, where it's like, if
nobody wants to walk the dog, the solution isn't opening
up the door. That the dog that everybody loved.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Which was wrong. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
And then when it came down to when you guys
were divorcing and the process was taking a long time,
I asked you if I could have the dog, and
if you remember.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
You said, after the divorce, yeah, reminded me.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
You're right, and then I never did send my dog again.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Well things happened.
Speaker 4 (18:42):
I'm aware how much I keep bringing up my dog Kobe,
but being in my old house brought all those memories back.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
So your question, I mean we did all this stuff. Yeah,
do you feel like going to these games? Do you
feel that you did it all for me? When we
would go to Madison Square Garden? Was that for me
or for you?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
It was? Everything was for you. I wanted you to
have some memories.
Speaker 4 (19:11):
You know, asking my father did he do this for me?
Or was it for him? Isn't exactly right because after
everything I've learned, I realized it's not an either or situation.
All those times we stuck into the garden, I think
he did it for me and for him.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Can I take this only if you want me to
have it?
Speaker 3 (19:30):
Well, it's a stick, but more than you having the
stick and me giving it to you is a gift
I want you as my son.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
Well, time will tell I'm not I'm not guaranteeing anything,
but I'm not going to cut you off cold turkey
or anything like that if that's what you're worried about.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
And what if your sisters get on your case for this?
Speaker 1 (19:54):
And I mean it doesn't have anything to do with them.
You know, you say so, but you know, like you
giving me a stick is like that's an appreciation because
I went in with the idea that to me a
lot of our relationship and what I deemed it was
(20:16):
you keeping Kobe over my head, and I felt that's
what you were going to be doing with the hockey stick,
even though the hockey stick never meant anything close to
what Kobe meant to me. It was just symbolic, and
Grandma and Grandpa meant a lot more to me than
(20:36):
everything else.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
And I don't know if you wanted to hurt them
because of me, but if you did, it was the
wrong thing to do, and it was a big mistake.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
And you know, maybe not now later you'll understand that.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Well, my intention was never to hurt them. My intention
was I just wasn't in any state of mind to
see you. And everything that happened at May is one thing,
but them is another thing. Yeah, Well tell that, you know,
to you know, a kid who's going through this as
a teenager, there's a lot of hate in their heart
(21:15):
when you know, Kobe is the thing that I love
more than anything. When I was growing up in this house,
there is there's times that there was laughter, but there's
also times where the cops would be called, not because
somebody was getting beaten, but the verbal arguments, whether.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
You called or she called, she didn't give a fuck.
She wanted to put me in jail.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
When I saw what I was dealing with at that point, well,
gloves were off.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I was going to do everything I can to hurt it.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
Why are you telling me this that none of this matters.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
Because you're telling me about why everybody hates me.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
I'm not telling you why I bade. I'm telling you
about why I wasn't talking to you for so long
and all right relationship because.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
You were told shit.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
That's why a lot of shit that you were told
was shit.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
You're saying that I wasso ship, but I'm saying about
how you treated me. That's what way I treated you.
Was not.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
There to intentionally hurt you. Never. I mean, when you
you know, if you think if you think that.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
He did the stuff about the dog, and okay, I did.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
This stuff about the dog, but unfortunately Kobe's not here.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
I had him to he was seventeen years old. Okay,
he had a good life. He fucking slept with me
every night, yeah, on the bed.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Yeah, and I would have loved to have had my dog.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
This is the most honest conversation I've ever had with
my father. Since the start of this whole journey, I'd
always envision getting to ask him the same questions I'd
asked everyone else.
Speaker 1 (22:38):
Was he always like this?
Speaker 4 (22:39):
What drove him to live his life this way? Well,
here I am, and now's my chance. But would he
be willing to open up? This is a guy whose
life is built on lies, and I was finally going
to ask him to tell the truth. On the next
episode of Number One Dad.
Speaker 2 (22:59):
All about delusion like a magician.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
I was a magician in the furniture business.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
What was the downfall of Designers Gallery?
Speaker 2 (23:07):
New York State Attorney General?
Speaker 3 (23:11):
I said, if I don't call you back for bullshit
in five minutes down nine one wanted Tom to come.
Speaker 2 (23:17):
To the thinkers.
Speaker 3 (23:17):
I'm getting locked in a freezer somewhere.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
So why not just pay your bill?
Speaker 3 (23:21):
Because I was a greedy fuck and I wanted the
money and I wanted it now.
Speaker 4 (23:33):
Number One Dad is a production of Radio Point, Big
Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts, created and hosted by
Gary Veeter.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Executive producers are.
Speaker 4 (23:42):
Gary Veeter, Adam Lowett, Alex Bach, Daniel Powell, Houston Snyder,
Kenneth Slotnik, and Brian Stern, written by Gary Veeter and
Adam Lowett, Produced by Bernie Kaminski. Co producer is Taylor Kowalski,
Edited and mixed by Ian Sortino at Little Bear Audio.
Recording Engineer Is kat Iosa. Original music by Andrew Gross.
(24:04):
Special thanks to Charlotte DeAnda. Jonathan karsh Is creative consultant.
Executive producers for Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts
are Will Farrell Hansani and Olivia Aguilar. Sound services were
provided by Great City Posts.
Host
Gary Vider
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