October 22, 2019 • 22 mins
She’s known for her straight talk and unfiltered candor. Angela Yee is not afraid to speak her mind on “The Breakfast Club” every morning, delighting millions of listeners across the country. In this interview, Angela is using her voice in a different way, to speak out about cause that’s close to her heart and to reveal the motivation behind her brand new project.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's people that are hurting, they are not happy with
where they are in life, and those are the people
that have feelings like that. And people also feel like, well,
why are you in that spot? And I'm not in
that position. I'm smarter than you on this, on that,
and they also feel like I haven't achieved what I
wanted to achieve in life, and this person is doing
the things that I wish I was doing. So instead
of me saying that's great, keep doing your thing, let
(00:21):
me figure out what I can learn from you that like,
I hate you. Your whacky's terrible. Why are you there? Hi?
(00:46):
I'm Dr Oz and this is the Doctor Oz Podcast.
She is known for her straight talk and unfiltered candor.
Angela is not afraid to speak her mind on the
Breakfast Club every morning. I've been there, witness so millions
of you because you've got up a lots of spokes
all over the country listening to Angie. So Angela, he
has done something very interesting. She's using her voice in
a way that's I think unique and suits her perfectly.
(01:07):
She's speaking out about a cause as close to her
heart and to reveal that motivation behind her brand new
project that might just make you blush a little bit,
and we'll get to a theme that made surprise everyone
in the room. But the first off, this gift of
gab that you have, which is really spectacular. I mean,
the people you co host Breakfast Hub with are not
gilty Willie's. They don't shy away, very chatty. Exactly getting
(01:28):
Charlot me off the mic is really a challenge. Oh
my gosh. Yeah, So when did you realize you had
a little bit of a gift to the gap as well? Well?
When I was younger, they used to call me the
news because I was always the first person that knew
something happened, so because I read the newspaper all the time.
So I remember one time, like one of the guys
I went to school with ended up getting arrested because
he worked at FedEx and they like stole the package,
(01:49):
and so it was always me that was the first
person spreading what happened, like, oh my god, did you
hear And then it turned into like, yeah, I heard
about it, Angela told me. So they used to call
me the news because they're like, oh my god, if
Angela hears about it, everyone's going to hear about it.
So I think just from when I was younger. I
had that reputation of just knowing everything that was going on.
And I was English major in college, so I was
pretty good at writing school. Yeah, Wesleyan University, and that
(02:14):
was just kind of how it started for me. But
I never thought about doing radio. I was doing marketing
before I started doing radio, and I think marketing and
being able to read it right, well, it just helps
you with no matter what it is that you want
to do in life. But you go back to how
you end up in in that college, and I guess
it's it's a it's a very famous school actually for
arts and literature. Um, it's it's interesting that you picked
(02:36):
that school, So you must have had some inclination even
when you're growing up that you wanted to have that aspiration.
Well for Wesley and they didn't have a core curriculum,
to be honest, that's the reason why I chose it,
because I didn't want to take all these classes that
didn't interest me, and most schools have a core curriculum.
So I was like, I'm gonna go there and just
take all writing in English classes because that's really what
I wanted. Your parents were all over that they were fine. Yeah,
(02:57):
they was just happy I was going to go to
college because everybody in your family go to college. My
dad did. He went to Burut and my brother went
to Brown, so he's older than me. So there's an
academic tradition in your family. People carry your family. These
are a great colleges too. Yeah. I mean from when
I was young, it was always a given that I
was going to have to go to college, whether or
not I wanted to. I think they put me on
(03:18):
that path early. Like when I was in fifth grade,
I was in this program called Prep for Prep, which
is in New York City, and basically they take kids
from the inner city and they put them in the
summer program for two summers and Wednesdays and Saturday during
the school year, and they teach you all these subjects
that you'll learn later on in life, so that by
the time and then they send your private school. So
we ended up going to private school. I went to
(03:40):
Polly Prep in Brooklyn. I think for me, I can't
see how college can really hurt you. But I don't
think you have to go to college. But I'll say
the biggest thing that comes out of college is also
the networking that you can do. And that's something that
I've learned. Like right now, Lemnuel Miranda went to Wesleyan,
right he wrote Hamilton's and so I'm actually on the
panel we're doing us scholarship. It's called the Hamilton's Scholarship,
(04:02):
where we're choosing a student to get a full scholarship
to go to Wesleyan. And so now we're actually choosing
it now like today, I have to go and do
other submissions. So it's an honor to be on that.
But for me, it's just the whole networking of being
able to use the alumni and the people that you
went to school with to actually help you out in
the future and be able to ask them, Hey, I'm
doing this now. I remember I was on a panel
(04:24):
and one of the guys on the panel he went
to Duke and he was saying that he started this
company and he just randomly hit up alumni he didn't
even know from Duke and they managed to get like
millions and investments just doing that. Oh, there's no question.
Is a is a calling card? Yeah, And a lot
of people don't appreciate that, and so they don't because
they don't under send the game and how it's played.
I think this is true a lot in America right now.
(04:45):
It's one of the biggest challenges we have because you
want fairness of opportunity. You can't guarantee outcomes, but you
want opportunity, and a lot of the opportunity subtle stuff.
My parents are immigrants. They didn't know the system, but
I had people around me and them who are willing
to teach it to us. That's why it's intriguing the
you've been through this role because because you Charlatane learned
life very differently. He's been on the deers On podcast recently.
(05:05):
We're talking about growing up in South Carolina with a
life that is you know, I actually might have predicted
because because he talks about it a lot, But but
it's not the life that you want to have. That
that that that's not going to catapult you to success.
Usually the way if you're that you actually had as
a child, those kind of in fact is that if
I don't know if it's true, but when you were
growing up, there weren't a lot of powerful women in radio.
(05:26):
There were some, but yeah, there weren't a lot. I
remember listening to the radio growing up and not even
I'm trying to think when I was really young, I
didn't hear any women. And I think when I was
really young to the genres of music were different because
you were here at the radio and it would be
like everything, so we all kind of listened to everything.
It wasn't as broken down as it is now. Where
I listened to this station, I can only hear this like.
(05:47):
There was just controversy about this hip hop song being
a country song, because you know it is. It's called
the Little nas X song. I don't know if you
heard it right. And originally Billy ray Cyrus wasn't on it,
so they pulled that song off the country charts even
though it was doing well, because they were like, this
isn't country. And then it turns hello, there's nothing more.
(06:09):
He's got a good career, I think yeah. And then
Billy ray Cyrus hopped on the song and actually ended
up getting more pressed because they were like, how is
this not a country song? But just the fact that
when you make music certain genres, you have to define
what it is or else you can't get played anywhere
because we're like, okay, what is this? Is this pop?
Is this urban? Is this country. It's good. I think
it's good that you have crossover. I think it right.
(06:31):
It gets to a wider audience, and it also helps
people are saying that if the breakfast club you might
not play a country song, right, they wouldn't but that
song maybe just because of the special illness of yeah,
but normally no, we wouldn't. And so I think, like
even with the I Heart Radio Music Festival, when we
do that, I get to hear artists that I normally
wouldn't hear because they have every genre of music. So
(06:53):
I'm like, who's that you know? And it could be
like the biggest pop star, the biggest country style. I
don't really know any country songs. So but I want
to push a limit of how you end up in radio.
So how did you finally realize you had a talent
that from going from being the news pastor pasturing your
family about about breaking news in the community to be
a you know, a world clash radio jockey. So it
(07:14):
really all happened by chance. I was doing marketing and
I worked for eminem when he launched his clothing line,
and I was really good friends with Paul Rosenberg, his
manager and partner, and so I called him one day
because I saw they had an opening as serious in
the marketing department. And that's my background has always been marketing.
I worked for a now Rogers, I worked at a
bunch of different clothing lines, and so I said, look,
(07:36):
there's an opening in the marketing department. I really want
to see if I can do this, Just do a
whole switch, get out of the fashion industry, get into uh,
you know, radio and satellite was pretty new and eminem
had just gotten a station. So Paul, his manager, says
to me, you know, why don't you try to do
the morning show. We're looking for a women's co host
on the morning show. So I had no experience at all,
(07:57):
and I remember he set up a meeting for me.
I'll never forget this. I to meet with like the
vice president of programming, and I didn't know anything about radio.
So I walked in there not knowing what was going
to happen, and he says to me, so, do you
have any experience in radio? I was like no, and
he was like, so were you interested in radio growing up?
I was like no, not really, but he was like
(08:18):
I was just trying to be honest. But I think
they first of all, he didn't have a choice but
to let me audition, because Paul did tell me, this
is an audition, so you're not guaranteed the job, but
this is an audition, so you're going there. I can't
tell you you have it, but at least you can
try and see if you can work out. So I
went in there and I worked there for free for
like a month and a half, and I remember how
(08:40):
terrible I was at first, Like people were calling up
like she sucks, get girl. It was really bad. Thank
god there was no social media because it would have
probably been terrible. I might not have made it honestly,
and so I didn't tell anybody I was on. I
didn't want anybody to listen to it because I was
so bad. I was like, I don't want my family
to know. And I didn't know I had the job,
so you know, you don't want to tell people I'm
(09:01):
doing this and then you're not. So I was really
quiet about it, but people were finding out slowly, and
then we had an interview with jay Z. And I
knew jay Z already because we're from Brooklyn, and you know,
I knew him. I knew all his friends. So I
remember we did this interview. It was right when he
became president of Deaf Jam, and the interview was so good.
I got hired as soon as we walked out, because
they thought it was such a great interview and it
(09:22):
was such a big interview for us, like people put
it on their mixtapes and turned into a huge deal.
So I walked out of there that like, you're hired,
and they actually even gave me back pay for the
time I was working. So what makes getting unemployment limitation exactly?
What makes a great interview? What made that interview special?
And another one since as you're talking to someone on
the breakfast club when you realize there's something real happening.
(09:45):
That interview in particular was good because it was a
very personal, fun conversation and people were not used to
him being like loose and joking around like that at
that time. So he actually came up there with Beyonce,
and this was before they had confirmed that they were dating,
and she was in the other room, the green room,
and so I remember there were several things that happened,
(10:05):
and it's funny even now, like to go back and
listen to it. But it was Chinese New Year that day,
and I'm have Chinese and so it was a year
of the Rooster, and so I remember joking around and
saying it was a year the cock and turned into
like a big joke. And then I was saying that
I had read like some groupie confession thing where some
girls said she slept with him and said it was terrible,
(10:26):
and he was like, na that, but he was like
joking around about it, and people don't talk to him
like that, So I think everybody was like, oh my god,
I can't believe this is happening. And then I was
like making fun of the way that he used to dress,
and so it was so funny that like the people
with him like got up and started laughing and left
the room and was like, oh my god, I can't
believe this. So it was just a funny interview that
people weren't used to hearing that. But asking a question
(10:48):
about a woman who's accusing him of having an accusing
but saying that she had sex with him and accusing
me of not being good, it's not something that's a
note would react well to. That didn't do that with
your normal I've never asked that question, you know, my
years of hosting radio podcasts in the TV show. It
wasn't a magazine though, so I'm sure he had seen
it already, you know, like it was. It was this
(11:09):
magazine called Ozone Magazine, and they have this segment that
was called Groupie Confessions where girls would like and who
knows like I guess they would vet them out to
see how true it was, but they would honestly anonymously
talk about people, they celebrities that they have been with
and how was it and if the person was good
or not, what happened and one girl you know, who
knows if it was two and I wrote about him.
(11:31):
There's lots more when we come back. So actually it
actually these things are the big theme that you're pushing
on now. You had a ted talk on this, which
is hate, and you make the argument that it's hard
to hate someone you don't really know. So a lot
(11:53):
of people do know. People do it all the time.
I know they do it all time. It's just hard
to legitimately hate somebody. So think j C. Everyone thinks
they know jay Z, but they learned a lot more
about him. In fact, you knew much more about him
than anyone actually probably did that I was listening to
the broadcast because he hasn't coming background, you understood a
bit more about the issues. You know, where you could
go and not go. They're probably ways you could have
enven asked those questions. It would have turned him off
(12:15):
and had seemed come closer and intervene as opposed to
relaxing and letting him be himself. No, you're right, it
is a lot of It is the way that you
approached somebody and your energy, because when people know you
don't have bad intentions, then I think it's a lot
easier for them to have a conversation. And I think
he also was aware because before the interview, I saw
him like he was coming out of the bathroom and
(12:36):
I was walking past him and he was like, what
are you doing here? Because like I said, nobody knew
I worked there, And I said, I'm about to interview,
and he was like, don't suck this up. And I
think he was probably also aware that I was nervous.
And that's the advice my producers give me every day.
But they worked so hard great the last thing before
I walk out of his don't effort. So he said that,
(12:56):
and I was like, oh my god, what am I
gonna do. And I think I asked if he was
danting Beyonce and no one had asked him that yet
because people were always like kind of intimidated, and she
was up there with him, so I was like, that's fair.
She we just saw her walk past, you know, working
for him, you know. And then I asked him if
you wanted to get married? I just so long ago? Yeah, yeah,
And what did he say? He was like, yeah, you
(13:17):
know one day. First he said he was gonna throw
his pager at me. He was like, and then he
was like, yeah, one day. So how do we deal
with hate? But what do you think drives it? Why
do we seem to have more of it now than before?
And it's interesting because you know, I did do a
hole ted talk at Wesleyan about hate and why do
people hate people that they don't know? And I think
(13:39):
what's really important to understand because I talked to kids
at school a lot, and it's hard for them with
social media and people attacking you all the time, and
then you feel like you have to respond to it.
And is anonymous people behind the keyboard saying things and
you'll never see them and they'll never say that to
your face, but I always try to tell people and
I had to come to understanding this myself because I'm
(14:00):
sure that you guys don't go any on online and
like right hateful things in comments because you know why,
you are feeling pretty good about yourself. Life is good,
you're successful. You don't have time for that, and you
probably wish other people well, that's actually a big part
of it. I think I always felt that it would
hurt me to hurt them, right, And that's a great
(14:20):
way to think. But you have to understand that it's
people that are hurting themselves and unlike they're not happy
with where they are in life, and those are the
people that have feelings like that. So if I can't
stand you or hate you, and I don't know you,
and I don't really have any reason, and I want
to come up with the reason, it's because it makes
me feel better about myself, because I'm not feeling good
about myself to hate you, because then it makes me
(14:41):
feel like, Okay, I'm better than you. And people also
feel like, well, why are you in that spot? And
I'm not in that position. I'm smarter than you, I'm this,
I'm that, And they also feel like I haven't achieved
what I wanted to achieve in life, and this person
is doing the things that I wish I was doing.
Some instead of me saying that's great, keep doing your thing,
let me figure out what I can learn from you
that like I hate you, whack, You're terrible? Why are
you there? So that's a hard thing to fix because,
(15:05):
as you point out, there living in their mother's basement,
they're happy with life, and uh, it is about them. Yeah,
it is not about the person they're writing about. So
how do you get them to focus in on that
or is that a litmus test? Sure? Share with focus
on some some of the insights you Sure, because it was
a very popular TED talk that you gave to your Well,
what I want people to understand is that A if
you feel like you're hating on somebody, you should check
(15:26):
yourself and understand where those feelings are coming from. So
if you're like, why am I hating this person? Why
do I feel so miserable? Sometimes you just have a
negative thought like oh, why she warned? Why is she know?
Why she's showing this? And you're like, actually, what I
really feel like she looks really great and good for
her that she could wear something like that because I
can't do that, you know, and sometimes that is where
it's coming from. And so I think it's important for
(15:48):
us to check ourselves and we start having these negative
feelings and say, why am I so unhappy? Because I
know when I'm happy, I don't even have thoughts like
that because I'm like spreading love and that's important, and
I think more importantly is for young people and you know,
everybody that has to deal with people hating on them
to understand that it's not because you're whack. It's because
(16:08):
there are people that are hating on you had their
own issues within themselves. So I don't think that what
anybody is saying is serious and take it to heart.
Just say I'm so glad that I don't have that
burden of hating somebody, because that's a heavy burden. You know.
There was a I had a woman who was well
known part of the British royal family who's on the show,
and she'd been hammered ruthlessly for her weight, and she
(16:31):
had this moment that was very emotional and I said,
you know, open up to us, what's going down. She's like,
I ran into the man who coined the phrase that
was so hurtful to me, and he was this little
gnome and he came up to me to party said,
I would have let you know I was when I
wrote that, and I went from hating whoever wrote it
to feel story you feel bad for the person. I mean,
(16:54):
I would never have thought someone like that, because that's
probably what you heard growing up. Which what you wrote
about me is probably what you heard them saying about you.
And that's you know, what you're just like in others
is what you dislike the most in yourself. So yeah,
and that's like when you see you all the time.
And I talked about this in my ted talk to
people who hate homosexuals, and we found it a lot
of times people have those urges themselves and hate the
fact that they can't be free and who it is
(17:15):
that they truly are, because we've seen that in politics
a lot, right, Yeah, exactly, and then it turns into
well it turns out this person was gay all along
because they hated the fact that you're out here being
able to express yourself and be who you really are,
and they have to feel closeted. More questions after the
break with actually we're talking about all kinds of fun stuff,
(17:47):
but she's spreading love in a new podcast just started
called lip Service beautifully named, where she opens the part
about relationships about sex. Why why is there such a
stigma in the country around sexuality? Why is there so
much stuff going on now about that about like sexuality
or talking about sex, talking about sex. I think for
women in particular, we're viewed a certain way, like where
(18:07):
we're not supposed to talk about certain things. And when
my podcast lip Service, we do talk about sex. And
I think it's a very positive thing because I learned
a lot from that show. And then I think it's
great for women to be able to relate to what
other women are going through because they might be going
through the same thing. People are curious about things that
maybe they've never done, and so there's a lot of
things that like people do that in the bedroom that
(18:29):
you know, we have no idea about that we might
never try. But I think it's interesting because we're try
not to judge what other people do. We just try
to listen to it and understand it. And so it's
been very educational for me. Well, it's such a intertwined
part of who we are, our sexuality is and we
don't think of it that way. We think it as
a separate But our species are designed to procreate, so
(18:50):
that involves enough to be alive, right, and not much
else except the sex. And we thrive because of other
things have happened with and we're the most sexual all species. Right, women,
Women will have sex when they're not in heat. They'll
have sex when they can't possibly reproduce post menoposal, for example. Right,
and when we don't even feel like it because we're tired. Okay, fine,
(19:17):
get it over with and spent hours days. That was
the old joke we had on the show that we
did a show on the male orgasm. But but you know,
we couldn't find it. It It was too short. Yeah, and
it's great for guys who had most bad looking look
for my wife. Now that was good. There was a
show on the male orgasm. It was too short. We
(19:37):
couldn't hear it. I get it. Yeah, that's a bad
And and and then there was that was the female orgasm.
We never aired because you couldn't find it. I mean, look, fortunately,
I'll be here all week. By the way, try to
corn beef. We know you will know. But it is
I think important for women to also learn how to
have orgasms more to like be more open to talk
about things. So the whole point of lip service is
(19:58):
for people, for women in to feel empowered, to be
able to say this is what I like, this is
what I don't like, to find out maybe there's things
that they're embarrassed to talk about because to me, and
I always tell people of this, the fact that you
can have sex with somebody and share your body with
them but be scared to say what you like and
don't like is crazy to me. So if you're willing
to share, and I think guys also like being told
(20:19):
what to do sometimes in the bedroom like that, you know,
we don't get a lot of lectures and what women.
Other guys tell us what women want, you know, and
they're dead wrong sometimes, Yeah, And we have to learn
not to fake it because then you guys will keep
doing the wrong things over and over and over again
because we're faking it and pretending that we like something
that we don't like, and then it never gets fixed
(20:39):
because two years and now we can't be like, you know,
I didn't really two years now. I think a lot
of it also is talking about it when you're not
in the heat of the moment, right right, So in
the calms time just said there are a couple of
things that feel good. And it's a bit more academic,
but believe in a few words said at the right
time have a huge, huge impact. And so it's how
(21:00):
you say it, just like we talked about with interviews,
is how you say it, because it's a sexy way.
You can tell somebody in the in the act how
to do something that you like and they'll do it
instead of saying I don't like this, to be like,
you know what I really like when you do. And
have you been applying your lip service podcasts insights into
your personal life? Yeah? Always, I'm a work in progress, always,
(21:21):
and I'm always willing to do. There's some things I'll
just never do, though, and I already know because I
feel like, if you know you don't like something, don't
try to force yourself to like it. If you just
don't do that and he never never a loss of words.
Thank you for joining a slip service or fantastic podcast
you want to check out with my heart. She also
pleased look at her Ted talk on hate. It was
very well done. I think it's something that can we
can all learn from. God bless your Paul. You do well.
(21:42):
Thank you guys so much. I really have fun
It's people that are hurting, they are not happy with
where they are in life, and those are the people
that have feelings like that. And people also feel like, well,
why are you in that spot? And I'm not in
that position. I'm smarter than you on this, on that,
and they also feel like I haven't achieved what I
wanted to achieve in life, and this person is doing
the things that I wish I was doing. So instead
of me saying that's great, keep doing your thing, let
(00:21):
me figure out what I can learn from you that like,
I hate you. Your whacky's terrible. Why are you there? Hi?
(00:46):
I'm Dr Oz and this is the Doctor Oz Podcast.
She is known for her straight talk and unfiltered candor.
Angela is not afraid to speak her mind on the
Breakfast Club every morning. I've been there, witness so millions
of you because you've got up a lots of spokes
all over the country listening to Angie. So Angela, he
has done something very interesting. She's using her voice in
a way that's I think unique and suits her perfectly.
(01:07):
She's speaking out about a cause as close to her
heart and to reveal that motivation behind her brand new
project that might just make you blush a little bit,
and we'll get to a theme that made surprise everyone
in the room. But the first off, this gift of
gab that you have, which is really spectacular. I mean,
the people you co host Breakfast Hub with are not
gilty Willie's. They don't shy away, very chatty. Exactly getting
(01:28):
Charlot me off the mic is really a challenge. Oh
my gosh. Yeah, So when did you realize you had
a little bit of a gift to the gap as well? Well?
When I was younger, they used to call me the
news because I was always the first person that knew
something happened, so because I read the newspaper all the time.
So I remember one time, like one of the guys
I went to school with ended up getting arrested because
he worked at FedEx and they like stole the package,
(01:49):
and so it was always me that was the first
person spreading what happened, like, oh my god, did you
hear And then it turned into like, yeah, I heard
about it, Angela told me. So they used to call
me the news because they're like, oh my god, if
Angela hears about it, everyone's going to hear about it.
So I think just from when I was younger. I
had that reputation of just knowing everything that was going on.
And I was English major in college, so I was
pretty good at writing school. Yeah, Wesleyan University, and that
(02:14):
was just kind of how it started for me. But
I never thought about doing radio. I was doing marketing
before I started doing radio, and I think marketing and
being able to read it right, well, it just helps
you with no matter what it is that you want
to do in life. But you go back to how
you end up in in that college, and I guess
it's it's a it's a very famous school actually for
arts and literature. Um, it's it's interesting that you picked
(02:36):
that school, So you must have had some inclination even
when you're growing up that you wanted to have that aspiration.
Well for Wesley and they didn't have a core curriculum,
to be honest, that's the reason why I chose it,
because I didn't want to take all these classes that
didn't interest me, and most schools have a core curriculum.
So I was like, I'm gonna go there and just
take all writing in English classes because that's really what
I wanted. Your parents were all over that they were fine. Yeah,
(02:57):
they was just happy I was going to go to
college because everybody in your family go to college. My
dad did. He went to Burut and my brother went
to Brown, so he's older than me. So there's an
academic tradition in your family. People carry your family. These
are a great colleges too. Yeah. I mean from when
I was young, it was always a given that I
was going to have to go to college, whether or
not I wanted to. I think they put me on
(03:18):
that path early. Like when I was in fifth grade,
I was in this program called Prep for Prep, which
is in New York City, and basically they take kids
from the inner city and they put them in the
summer program for two summers and Wednesdays and Saturday during
the school year, and they teach you all these subjects
that you'll learn later on in life, so that by
the time and then they send your private school. So
we ended up going to private school. I went to
(03:40):
Polly Prep in Brooklyn. I think for me, I can't
see how college can really hurt you. But I don't
think you have to go to college. But I'll say
the biggest thing that comes out of college is also
the networking that you can do. And that's something that
I've learned. Like right now, Lemnuel Miranda went to Wesleyan,
right he wrote Hamilton's and so I'm actually on the
panel we're doing us scholarship. It's called the Hamilton's Scholarship,
(04:02):
where we're choosing a student to get a full scholarship
to go to Wesleyan. And so now we're actually choosing
it now like today, I have to go and do
other submissions. So it's an honor to be on that.
But for me, it's just the whole networking of being
able to use the alumni and the people that you
went to school with to actually help you out in
the future and be able to ask them, Hey, I'm
doing this now. I remember I was on a panel
(04:24):
and one of the guys on the panel he went
to Duke and he was saying that he started this
company and he just randomly hit up alumni he didn't
even know from Duke and they managed to get like
millions and investments just doing that. Oh, there's no question.
Is a is a calling card? Yeah, And a lot
of people don't appreciate that, and so they don't because
they don't under send the game and how it's played.
I think this is true a lot in America right now.
(04:45):
It's one of the biggest challenges we have because you
want fairness of opportunity. You can't guarantee outcomes, but you
want opportunity, and a lot of the opportunity subtle stuff.
My parents are immigrants. They didn't know the system, but
I had people around me and them who are willing
to teach it to us. That's why it's intriguing the
you've been through this role because because you Charlatane learned
life very differently. He's been on the deers On podcast recently.
(05:05):
We're talking about growing up in South Carolina with a
life that is you know, I actually might have predicted
because because he talks about it a lot, But but
it's not the life that you want to have. That
that that that's not going to catapult you to success.
Usually the way if you're that you actually had as
a child, those kind of in fact is that if
I don't know if it's true, but when you were
growing up, there weren't a lot of powerful women in radio.
(05:26):
There were some, but yeah, there weren't a lot. I
remember listening to the radio growing up and not even
I'm trying to think when I was really young, I
didn't hear any women. And I think when I was
really young to the genres of music were different because
you were here at the radio and it would be
like everything, so we all kind of listened to everything.
It wasn't as broken down as it is now. Where
I listened to this station, I can only hear this like.
(05:47):
There was just controversy about this hip hop song being
a country song, because you know it is. It's called
the Little nas X song. I don't know if you
heard it right. And originally Billy ray Cyrus wasn't on it,
so they pulled that song off the country charts even
though it was doing well, because they were like, this
isn't country. And then it turns hello, there's nothing more.
(06:09):
He's got a good career, I think yeah. And then
Billy ray Cyrus hopped on the song and actually ended
up getting more pressed because they were like, how is
this not a country song? But just the fact that
when you make music certain genres, you have to define
what it is or else you can't get played anywhere
because we're like, okay, what is this? Is this pop?
Is this urban? Is this country. It's good. I think
it's good that you have crossover. I think it right.
(06:31):
It gets to a wider audience, and it also helps
people are saying that if the breakfast club you might
not play a country song, right, they wouldn't but that
song maybe just because of the special illness of yeah,
but normally no, we wouldn't. And so I think, like
even with the I Heart Radio Music Festival, when we
do that, I get to hear artists that I normally
wouldn't hear because they have every genre of music. So
(06:53):
I'm like, who's that you know? And it could be
like the biggest pop star, the biggest country style. I
don't really know any country songs. So but I want
to push a limit of how you end up in radio.
So how did you finally realize you had a talent
that from going from being the news pastor pasturing your
family about about breaking news in the community to be
a you know, a world clash radio jockey. So it
(07:14):
really all happened by chance. I was doing marketing and
I worked for eminem when he launched his clothing line,
and I was really good friends with Paul Rosenberg, his
manager and partner, and so I called him one day
because I saw they had an opening as serious in
the marketing department. And that's my background has always been marketing.
I worked for a now Rogers, I worked at a
bunch of different clothing lines, and so I said, look,
(07:36):
there's an opening in the marketing department. I really want
to see if I can do this, Just do a
whole switch, get out of the fashion industry, get into uh,
you know, radio and satellite was pretty new and eminem
had just gotten a station. So Paul, his manager, says
to me, you know, why don't you try to do
the morning show. We're looking for a women's co host
on the morning show. So I had no experience at all,
(07:57):
and I remember he set up a meeting for me.
I'll never forget this. I to meet with like the
vice president of programming, and I didn't know anything about radio.
So I walked in there not knowing what was going
to happen, and he says to me, so, do you
have any experience in radio? I was like no, and
he was like, so were you interested in radio growing up?
I was like no, not really, but he was like
(08:18):
I was just trying to be honest. But I think
they first of all, he didn't have a choice but
to let me audition, because Paul did tell me, this
is an audition, so you're not guaranteed the job, but
this is an audition, so you're going there. I can't
tell you you have it, but at least you can
try and see if you can work out. So I
went in there and I worked there for free for
like a month and a half, and I remember how
(08:40):
terrible I was at first, Like people were calling up
like she sucks, get girl. It was really bad. Thank
god there was no social media because it would have
probably been terrible. I might not have made it honestly,
and so I didn't tell anybody I was on. I
didn't want anybody to listen to it because I was
so bad. I was like, I don't want my family
to know. And I didn't know I had the job,
so you know, you don't want to tell people I'm
(09:01):
doing this and then you're not. So I was really
quiet about it, but people were finding out slowly, and
then we had an interview with jay Z. And I
knew jay Z already because we're from Brooklyn, and you know,
I knew him. I knew all his friends. So I
remember we did this interview. It was right when he
became president of Deaf Jam, and the interview was so good.
I got hired as soon as we walked out, because
they thought it was such a great interview and it
(09:22):
was such a big interview for us, like people put
it on their mixtapes and turned into a huge deal.
So I walked out of there that like, you're hired,
and they actually even gave me back pay for the
time I was working. So what makes getting unemployment limitation exactly?
What makes a great interview? What made that interview special?
And another one since as you're talking to someone on
the breakfast club when you realize there's something real happening.
(09:45):
That interview in particular was good because it was a
very personal, fun conversation and people were not used to
him being like loose and joking around like that at
that time. So he actually came up there with Beyonce,
and this was before they had confirmed that they were dating,
and she was in the other room, the green room,
and so I remember there were several things that happened,
(10:05):
and it's funny even now, like to go back and
listen to it. But it was Chinese New Year that day,
and I'm have Chinese and so it was a year
of the Rooster, and so I remember joking around and
saying it was a year the cock and turned into
like a big joke. And then I was saying that
I had read like some groupie confession thing where some
girls said she slept with him and said it was terrible,
(10:26):
and he was like, na that, but he was like
joking around about it, and people don't talk to him
like that, So I think everybody was like, oh my god,
I can't believe this is happening. And then I was
like making fun of the way that he used to dress,
and so it was so funny that like the people
with him like got up and started laughing and left
the room and was like, oh my god, I can't
believe this. So it was just a funny interview that
people weren't used to hearing that. But asking a question
(10:48):
about a woman who's accusing him of having an accusing
but saying that she had sex with him and accusing
me of not being good, it's not something that's a
note would react well to. That didn't do that with
your normal I've never asked that question, you know, my
years of hosting radio podcasts in the TV show. It
wasn't a magazine though, so I'm sure he had seen
it already, you know, like it was. It was this
(11:09):
magazine called Ozone Magazine, and they have this segment that
was called Groupie Confessions where girls would like and who
knows like I guess they would vet them out to
see how true it was, but they would honestly anonymously
talk about people, they celebrities that they have been with
and how was it and if the person was good
or not, what happened and one girl you know, who
knows if it was two and I wrote about him.
(11:31):
There's lots more when we come back. So actually it
actually these things are the big theme that you're pushing
on now. You had a ted talk on this, which
is hate, and you make the argument that it's hard
to hate someone you don't really know. So a lot
(11:53):
of people do know. People do it all the time.
I know they do it all time. It's just hard
to legitimately hate somebody. So think j C. Everyone thinks
they know jay Z, but they learned a lot more
about him. In fact, you knew much more about him
than anyone actually probably did that I was listening to
the broadcast because he hasn't coming background, you understood a
bit more about the issues. You know, where you could
go and not go. They're probably ways you could have
enven asked those questions. It would have turned him off
(12:15):
and had seemed come closer and intervene as opposed to
relaxing and letting him be himself. No, you're right, it
is a lot of It is the way that you
approached somebody and your energy, because when people know you
don't have bad intentions, then I think it's a lot
easier for them to have a conversation. And I think
he also was aware because before the interview, I saw
him like he was coming out of the bathroom and
(12:36):
I was walking past him and he was like, what
are you doing here? Because like I said, nobody knew
I worked there, And I said, I'm about to interview,
and he was like, don't suck this up. And I
think he was probably also aware that I was nervous.
And that's the advice my producers give me every day.
But they worked so hard great the last thing before
I walk out of his don't effort. So he said that,
(12:56):
and I was like, oh my god, what am I
gonna do. And I think I asked if he was
danting Beyonce and no one had asked him that yet
because people were always like kind of intimidated, and she
was up there with him, so I was like, that's fair.
She we just saw her walk past, you know, working
for him, you know. And then I asked him if
you wanted to get married? I just so long ago? Yeah, yeah,
And what did he say? He was like, yeah, you
(13:17):
know one day. First he said he was gonna throw
his pager at me. He was like, and then he
was like, yeah, one day. So how do we deal
with hate? But what do you think drives it? Why
do we seem to have more of it now than before?
And it's interesting because you know, I did do a
hole ted talk at Wesleyan about hate and why do
people hate people that they don't know? And I think
(13:39):
what's really important to understand because I talked to kids
at school a lot, and it's hard for them with
social media and people attacking you all the time, and
then you feel like you have to respond to it.
And is anonymous people behind the keyboard saying things and
you'll never see them and they'll never say that to
your face, but I always try to tell people and
I had to come to understanding this myself because I'm
(14:00):
sure that you guys don't go any on online and
like right hateful things in comments because you know why,
you are feeling pretty good about yourself. Life is good,
you're successful. You don't have time for that, and you
probably wish other people well, that's actually a big part
of it. I think I always felt that it would
hurt me to hurt them, right, And that's a great
(14:20):
way to think. But you have to understand that it's
people that are hurting themselves and unlike they're not happy
with where they are in life, and those are the
people that have feelings like that. So if I can't
stand you or hate you, and I don't know you,
and I don't really have any reason, and I want
to come up with the reason, it's because it makes
me feel better about myself, because I'm not feeling good
about myself to hate you, because then it makes me
(14:41):
feel like, Okay, I'm better than you. And people also
feel like, well, why are you in that spot? And
I'm not in that position. I'm smarter than you, I'm this,
I'm that, And they also feel like I haven't achieved
what I wanted to achieve in life, and this person
is doing the things that I wish I was doing.
Some instead of me saying that's great, keep doing your thing,
let me figure out what I can learn from you
that like I hate you, whack, You're terrible? Why are
you there? So that's a hard thing to fix because,
(15:05):
as you point out, there living in their mother's basement,
they're happy with life, and uh, it is about them. Yeah,
it is not about the person they're writing about. So
how do you get them to focus in on that
or is that a litmus test? Sure? Share with focus
on some some of the insights you Sure, because it was
a very popular TED talk that you gave to your Well,
what I want people to understand is that A if
you feel like you're hating on somebody, you should check
(15:26):
yourself and understand where those feelings are coming from. So
if you're like, why am I hating this person? Why
do I feel so miserable? Sometimes you just have a
negative thought like oh, why she warned? Why is she know?
Why she's showing this? And you're like, actually, what I
really feel like she looks really great and good for
her that she could wear something like that because I
can't do that, you know, and sometimes that is where
it's coming from. And so I think it's important for
(15:48):
us to check ourselves and we start having these negative
feelings and say, why am I so unhappy? Because I
know when I'm happy, I don't even have thoughts like
that because I'm like spreading love and that's important, and
I think more importantly is for young people and you know,
everybody that has to deal with people hating on them
to understand that it's not because you're whack. It's because
(16:08):
there are people that are hating on you had their
own issues within themselves. So I don't think that what
anybody is saying is serious and take it to heart.
Just say I'm so glad that I don't have that
burden of hating somebody, because that's a heavy burden. You know.
There was a I had a woman who was well
known part of the British royal family who's on the show,
and she'd been hammered ruthlessly for her weight, and she
(16:31):
had this moment that was very emotional and I said,
you know, open up to us, what's going down. She's like,
I ran into the man who coined the phrase that
was so hurtful to me, and he was this little
gnome and he came up to me to party said,
I would have let you know I was when I
wrote that, and I went from hating whoever wrote it
to feel story you feel bad for the person. I mean,
(16:54):
I would never have thought someone like that, because that's
probably what you heard growing up. Which what you wrote
about me is probably what you heard them saying about you.
And that's you know, what you're just like in others
is what you dislike the most in yourself. So yeah,
and that's like when you see you all the time.
And I talked about this in my ted talk to
people who hate homosexuals, and we found it a lot
of times people have those urges themselves and hate the
fact that they can't be free and who it is
(17:15):
that they truly are, because we've seen that in politics
a lot, right, Yeah, exactly, and then it turns into
well it turns out this person was gay all along
because they hated the fact that you're out here being
able to express yourself and be who you really are,
and they have to feel closeted. More questions after the
break with actually we're talking about all kinds of fun stuff,
(17:47):
but she's spreading love in a new podcast just started
called lip Service beautifully named, where she opens the part
about relationships about sex. Why why is there such a
stigma in the country around sexuality? Why is there so
much stuff going on now about that about like sexuality
or talking about sex, talking about sex. I think for
women in particular, we're viewed a certain way, like where
(18:07):
we're not supposed to talk about certain things. And when
my podcast lip Service, we do talk about sex. And
I think it's a very positive thing because I learned
a lot from that show. And then I think it's
great for women to be able to relate to what
other women are going through because they might be going
through the same thing. People are curious about things that
maybe they've never done, and so there's a lot of
things that like people do that in the bedroom that
(18:29):
you know, we have no idea about that we might
never try. But I think it's interesting because we're try
not to judge what other people do. We just try
to listen to it and understand it. And so it's
been very educational for me. Well, it's such a intertwined
part of who we are, our sexuality is and we
don't think of it that way. We think it as
a separate But our species are designed to procreate, so
(18:50):
that involves enough to be alive, right, and not much
else except the sex. And we thrive because of other
things have happened with and we're the most sexual all species. Right, women,
Women will have sex when they're not in heat. They'll
have sex when they can't possibly reproduce post menoposal, for example. Right,
and when we don't even feel like it because we're tired. Okay, fine,
(19:17):
get it over with and spent hours days. That was
the old joke we had on the show that we
did a show on the male orgasm. But but you know,
we couldn't find it. It It was too short. Yeah, and
it's great for guys who had most bad looking look
for my wife. Now that was good. There was a
show on the male orgasm. It was too short. We
(19:37):
couldn't hear it. I get it. Yeah, that's a bad
And and and then there was that was the female orgasm.
We never aired because you couldn't find it. I mean, look, fortunately,
I'll be here all week. By the way, try to
corn beef. We know you will know. But it is
I think important for women to also learn how to
have orgasms more to like be more open to talk
about things. So the whole point of lip service is
(19:58):
for people, for women in to feel empowered, to be
able to say this is what I like, this is
what I don't like, to find out maybe there's things
that they're embarrassed to talk about because to me, and
I always tell people of this, the fact that you
can have sex with somebody and share your body with
them but be scared to say what you like and
don't like is crazy to me. So if you're willing
to share, and I think guys also like being told
(20:19):
what to do sometimes in the bedroom like that, you know,
we don't get a lot of lectures and what women.
Other guys tell us what women want, you know, and
they're dead wrong sometimes, Yeah, And we have to learn
not to fake it because then you guys will keep
doing the wrong things over and over and over again
because we're faking it and pretending that we like something
that we don't like, and then it never gets fixed
(20:39):
because two years and now we can't be like, you know,
I didn't really two years now. I think a lot
of it also is talking about it when you're not
in the heat of the moment, right right, So in
the calms time just said there are a couple of
things that feel good. And it's a bit more academic,
but believe in a few words said at the right
time have a huge, huge impact. And so it's how
(21:00):
you say it, just like we talked about with interviews,
is how you say it, because it's a sexy way.
You can tell somebody in the in the act how
to do something that you like and they'll do it
instead of saying I don't like this, to be like,
you know what I really like when you do. And
have you been applying your lip service podcasts insights into
your personal life? Yeah? Always, I'm a work in progress, always,
(21:21):
and I'm always willing to do. There's some things I'll
just never do, though, and I already know because I
feel like, if you know you don't like something, don't
try to force yourself to like it. If you just
don't do that and he never never a loss of words.
Thank you for joining a slip service or fantastic podcast
you want to check out with my heart. She also
pleased look at her Ted talk on hate. It was
very well done. I think it's something that can we
can all learn from. God bless your Paul. You do well.
(21:42):
Thank you guys so much. I really have fun
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