November 4, 2025 • 47 mins
When Vanessa Elias saw a rise of incivility in her Connecticut town, she rallied citizens to host 40 neighborhood block parties that had 1,200 attendees, so that people can get to know their neighbors, realize that they don’t hate them, and even enjoy them. It got so much attention that she started Block Party USA to spread this simple solution across the country!
Support the show: https://www.normalfolks.us/premium
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Everybody. It's Bill Courtney with an army and normal folks.
And we continue now with part two of our conversation
with Vanessa Elias, right after these brief messages from our
general sponsors, back to twenty sixteen, all of this that
(00:28):
we just unpacked, and your answer.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Is block party.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Let's have a party. There's incivility on Facebook and people
hate each other, so let's have a party.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
That's right, but it has to be so the whole
purpose was to get neighborhood free play.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
So we had brought.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
In, so we listened this woman and I had heard
Peter Gray speak and he is a research psychologist out
of Boston College, and we'd heard him in a neighboring
town maybe the year before.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
And we left.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
Depressed because basically, you left so depressed because basically he
was saying, if your neighborhood doesn't have kids playing, move
like that was our that was like our option because
and you went.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Through like, or if your neighborhood didn't have kids playing,
start them playing right well, than.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
It was basically that's what we saw the answer. But
he laid out the right the decrease in play and
the rise and anxiety and depression really kids. Yeah, and
it's very clear. The data points are there. It's very clear.
And so some of the parents in the grade was
at a nursery school and some of the parents were asking,
you know, and at that age, it's easy. Don't sign
them up for travel soccer when they're seven years old, right,
(01:41):
get them.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
To have play dates. But even play dates, you're stuck
with that same kid.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
So in terms of the normal neighborhood play, if someone's
being a jerk, you're like, forget it, I'm leap right.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
You can't do that if you have a kid over.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
If you're you know, what's interesting that you just said,
don't try to sign your kid up for travel soccer
when they're seven. Just let them have fun. You know.
I don't guess you're a huge football fan because you
evoked ballet before you said football, all right, But I
bet you it's all right. You've lived all over Europe
and everything. You're probably a bigger soccer fan than American
(02:13):
football fan. But I bet you've heard the name Manning,
Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Archie Manning. So even people that
don't know football know the word Manning. All right. Do
you know that Archie Manning would not let his sons
play tackle football or competitive football until lighth grade. Brilliant,
(02:34):
probably the royal family of American football, three generations, super
Bowl winners, Heisman candidates with a grandson now that has
a four million dollar l at the University of Texas
to play college football. That is, this family did not
let their PIDs play competitive tackle football until lighth grade.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Which is the age most kids burn out because they've
been playing it.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
Incredible, So when you say don't sign up your kid
for competitive soccer as six, that's what clicked in my mind.
And the point is let kids be kids, exactly, Let
them be creative, let them get hurt a little bit,
let them bounce around in the neighborhoods. But before you
do that, you have to have connectivity in the neighborhood
(03:24):
for the kids to go into exactly. So you left
the Scout oppressed.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
So we left its lovely. Peter Gray is lovely, said.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
Let's crawl fish.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
But we left depressed because we felt powerless, right like,
how are we going to change this?
Speaker 2 (03:46):
How are we going to make this different?
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Right? Yeah, So that's when we developed this free Play
task Force. We had them come speak to our town.
We invited all the stakeholders in town, like from the
y m c A, the superintendent, all the principles, all
you know, rotary club, city Council, Bordis, Luckmen, Bordify everybody,
some teachers, and he spoke the most amazing. Our superintendent
(04:09):
stood up and at the end and said I'm in
and that changed everything.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
I'm in.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
He's got five kids of his own and he set
the tone. And with that, we developed the Free Play
Task Force to educate our community on why it's so
important that kids have free play. We worked to extend recess,
worked with Leonor Scanesia let Grow to develop free play clubs,
and you know, just just launched this whole initiative. But
we needed something for neighborhoods and so I was like, yes,
(04:38):
finally I can do this, and so yeah, we launched
Wilton's Big Block Party Weekends. The first weekend was in
June of twenty eighteen. We did two weekends book nding
the summer to get you know, people could choose what
you know, what worked best for them and your block.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
You were encouraging neighbor the hotel across your entire community
on their block. So are you telling me in this
town there were block parties all over the place on this.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
Weekends there was there were at least forty block parties.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Forty yeah, are you kidding? That is so? What's what's
the geographical idea of a quote block party?
Speaker 3 (05:17):
In generally in general, it's ten to twenty of your
closest neighbors.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
So it is whether you share.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
A wall with them right in an apartment building or
condo complex, right or whatever, or they're two miles down
the road, they're still your neighbors. And so ten to
twenty of your closest neighbors. And it was a huge success,
and it was has become a tradition for families. It
has the feedback that I got from it, you know,
(05:47):
from little kids saying it was the best day of
their lives to.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yeah, a block party best day, yeah right, not Christmas?
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Right, it's literally what they said. They were so excited
them for the next year and wanted to put the
flyers out and yeah, so wow, it was so it
was I guess he was ten years old, don you At.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
What point did this idea that became these forty block
par days all over your town? At what point, did
you say I might have.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
A thing here when other towns nearby asked how we
did it?
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Wanted to know more about the.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Fact the other towns here.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
I get, well, we were getting national attention, were you
really at the time? Yeah, we did.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
We had PBS News Hour, we were being filmed.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
This is so simple, it's it's so simple.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
It's so simple, and it's so actionable. And every single
every single person has a neighbor and every single person
can do this. It's so actionable, right, there's no ringing
of the hands and what do we do? How do
we sol like this is something anybody can do.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
So the neighboring community started you saying how'd you do this?
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Yeah? Had you know? Asking questions.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
I kept hearing more and more stories of the impact
of the singular block party, or what I call now
the block party ripple effect, you know, all the things
that end up coming, right, not just the party is fun,
but it's about what comes after. And there were stories
that brought tears.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
To my eyes. Get you know, and.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
I've read a couple and I was just like, holy smut.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Yeah, So so that and then just this date, you know,
the state of the nation Basically I realized this is
something we need nationwide, and this is something that is
actionable again by every single person. So so I launched
block Party USA in twenty twenty three.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Finally I talked about it for about two years.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
When I read that, I went back to my teen
years and I thought of MTV of felt like a
block Party USA thing. There's some like guitar music in
the background or something, But I did I thought, that
feels like nineteen eighty six to me, And thank god,
(08:13):
it does feel like nineteen eighty six to me, to
a simpler time really in terms of our humanity and
even when we disagreed with each other, how we interacted
and it just good. Block Party USA just kind of
brought a smile out about face. I think it's hilarious.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Thank you, So tell me what is what is it now?
So what does it growing too? From them?
Speaker 3 (08:37):
Yeah? So now it is a nichewide movement and it is,
as I say, is a free, simple and actionable cure
for our country's loneliness, social isolation, divisiveness, and the youth
mental health crisis.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Say that one more time. That is really important.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Yeah, it is block Party USA. Is a simple, free
and actionable cure for our country's loneliness, social isolation, divisiveness,
and the youth mental health crisis.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
And inability, which is yeah, which is where the start
and incibility exactly freaking awesome. So it's only two years old. Yep,
not the block Party, but Block Party USA.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Yeah, and people love the idea. People have forgotten about
block parties, right, people they were a thing of their child.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I forgot about block parties, So tell me what it's doing.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
So yeah, So it's it's been really exciting because it
resonates with people. It resonates with people because it's a
fond memory of their childhood and it's something that they
know that they can do that it's actionable. And so
I have people signed up from forty six states in Washington,
d c. And a couple of other countries Nairobi or
(10:03):
Kenya and what. Yeah, I signed up that are interested
and so you know, part of for a little what
Canada as well and.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
For a little WI.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
I was like, oh, I shouldn't have put us, but
you know that's my that's my focus and people can
adopt it.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
It's about neighborhood gatherings.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
So yeah, so as part of doctor Vivic H. Murphy's
Quote Recipes for Connections initiatives, the Office of the US
Surgeon General features two year old Block Party USA as
a resource that supports building social connection through gathering. Wow.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Yeah, that was pretty awesome. It was really exciting.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
How did that happen?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
I don't actually know.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
I ask you're just hanging out having block for.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
I did ask Jennifer Wallace, the author I mentioned earlier,
because I know she was working with him on something,
and I said, were you the very bit told doctor
Murphy about it, but she said, no, you already knew
about it.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
So I don't.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
I feel really grateful, and it helped amplify because I
think the most important thing is just and that's why
I so appreciate talking to you is just amplifying this message.
It's so actionable for people to do, and it's just
that we just have to bring it back into their
consciousness and my job is to sort of hold their
hands they.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
As they go, Okay, I got lots more questions. Yeah,
and we're also going to talk about these things, which
I found vastly interesting. But I think now's good time
for this. We had our first block party in September.
It was so much fun and we had an excellent turnout.
I've lived on this street for many years and know
most of the neighbors, but it was great to meet
(11:47):
the others and to all hang out together. We tend
to do this again the summer. We even set up
a Facebook page for our neighborhood. A second person said,
we organized the block party with short notice, and we're
pleasantly surprised at how how easy it was to plan
and how many people came. People of all ages responded,
and we met other families with kids that we would
(12:07):
not have known otherwise. Everyone brought a snack to share
and coolers with their drinks. We had tons of fun
playing cornhole and the kids had a massive water balloon fight.
Oh no, someone might get their eye poked out. Sorry,
I was just that was my embellishment. They drenched the
parents and really everyone got involved. We look forward to
(12:27):
doing it again this year. Third after our block party,
our street changed. Kids are actually playing outside together. Everyone
from young couples to families to seniors are in their
yards more. I see more people out walking their dogs.
Neighbors go out of their way to say hello, stop
and talk and help one another. Allan, it's the same
(12:48):
people who I guarantee you on last election, some had
Trump and some had harisions in the yard yep, and
they don't care so much about that anymore. But if
you don't know the person with that Trump sign or
that air sign in your front yard, you may come
up with some preconceived notions about those people that are
(13:09):
completely false. And the way you find out if they're
false or not is.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
You get to know them in real life.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
In real life, how do you feel when you hear
people saying.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
That it's what gives my life meaning and purpose? It
makes me I'm tearing up again because it's just so
meaningful and it's just I mean, I think that's what
we underestimate, is the power of one person making a
difference in other people's lives. So that person that organized
that block party made a difference in everyone's lives.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
There, you mean, just a normal person, Just.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
A normal person exactly doing what they can do.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
So I could call some neighbors right now and say
let's have a block party. I don't really need block
party to say for that. That was my initial thought
until I started reading Born. Researching Born, I got some
handy dandy stuff that Alex got off your website that
you sent us.
Speaker 5 (14:10):
I did well today.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Why does block Party USA as an organization matter to
people who want block parties? Catch it?
Speaker 3 (14:18):
I think people are really busy, okay, and they're not
They want to do something, but they're not actually sure
how to do it. And so my I see, my
role is making it easy for them.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Right. We are all overtasked, over, over stressed over.
Speaker 5 (14:32):
Everything, right, and I got a bandwidth?
Speaker 3 (14:34):
What one more thing? You're asking me to do? One
more thing?
Speaker 6 (14:37):
Right?
Speaker 3 (14:37):
And so how to make it as easy as possible
for people is the first thing. We'll be right back,
(15:00):
and how to make it most success right, Like you
can have a block party, but without the name tags
and the contact list, it's just it doesn't have you know,
there's so much more potential I guess when you have
those things. So just putting those in people's minds. The
other piece is that we live in a very procured
(15:21):
through social media perfectionist environment like what we think it
needs to be. And to have someone in your ear
constantly saying keep it simple, keep it simple, keep it simple,
and you don't need that, right, This is just a gathering,
and to keep helping people focus on just the fact
of bringing people together. You're acting it's a service, and
(15:43):
this is not a party to impress, it's a party
to connect.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
When I read that, I thought about the fact that
when Lisa and I got married in nineteen ninety one,
we did it in a church. We had our reception
at the church. She had a lovely dress, we had
a nice cake. A bunch of people came. It was
lovely and beautiful. There were a few flowers on the altar,
(16:08):
and I'm certain maybe a couple of arrangements at our
wedding at our reception church, and then we got in
a car and drove off and it probably lasted three
or four hours and costs I don't know, twenty five
hundred and three thousand bucks, maybe if you count the
finger food and the cake. And today a wedding is
(16:28):
a week long event.
Speaker 6 (16:30):
So years year long event. You've been to engagement parties
and made for even.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Yeah, we've had engaging parties, but there's a cap on
what we do because of what I'm saying. But the
point is, I feel like we've lost sight of the
fact that we're supposed to be celebrating the union of
a young couple, and that's what it's there for. Now
it's become almost an excuse to engage in excesses to
(16:58):
a whole different realf I could go off on, but
I've got a daughter getting married. I've already married off
one saw this marriage, so I've been through all of it.
And I certainly am not trying to disparage people who
want their children to have a lovely day. But the
point is, I think we can lose sight of what
(17:18):
the point is behind a marriage. And when I was
reading your block party thing metaphorically, that's kind of came
up with my mind, which is what you're saying is
it's not about the biggest balloons. It's not about making
sure the venue is absolutely perfect, it's not about spending
a whole bunch of money on a bunch of crap.
It's simply about getting your neighbors together. So keep it
(17:42):
simple and just make it. Let the people make it fun,
not the crap that you bring in. That's kind of
what I was getting from you on that. Is that
not right?
Speaker 3 (17:52):
It's one hundred percent right because those wedding right at
what cost?
Speaker 4 (17:57):
Right?
Speaker 3 (17:58):
And I don't mean financial costs. I mean like the
effort and the stress and all that stuff. It's sort
of like kid anxiety birthday parties, now right, they are
so over the top.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Why can't we just have a pizza and a cake
and a park and call it that.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
We did old fat like old fashion on birth that
we had games for my youngest party.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
The kids loved it. Then her friends would be like, can.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
I have a party?
Speaker 3 (18:19):
Like?
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Right?
Speaker 5 (18:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
It was pintail and a donkey.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
It was a donut, you know, with your hands behind
your back, grab it trying to.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Eat it.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
For apple.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Exactly exactly. Swap in DNA.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Yeah, oh god. Yeah. What would the Swiss say about that?
Speaker 3 (18:37):
They wouldn't say anything first.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
So yes, one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
But with block parties, what I've so one of I
have these monthly sometimes weekly depending on the time of year,
office hours and block party zooms so people can come
ask any questions, yeah, just to have like you know,
they ask it some support. And one of them, one
woman came, I think she's from Pennsylvania, and she said,
(19:04):
I am a reluctant block party organizer, and I was
like okay, and she explained that the two women that
had done it for years had stepped down because it
was just too much.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
And so that is the cost, right, if.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
We overly manufacture this, engineer it. We've got a band
and volunteer sign ups and we've got that, like it's
a production. That's not what this is about, right, That's
what I mean.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
About the weddings. When it's more about the production than
the celebration of the marriage, you're missing a point. Yeah,
and that's the point with the block party. Yeah, here's
another reason why block party. This little one pager I loved.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Thanks.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Uh, it's block party, who say how to organize a
block party? It's easier than you think, and it's got
some headings with little boxes around it, but it says
keep it simple, don't go at it alone, select today,
go big, go small. Location. You need a permit, name, tags,
and sign in sheet, so you're building a database in
(20:06):
your community. Invite mixed ages, which I think you have
to speak on food and here's the best one, bubbles
chalk and a kickball. This is why block party, I say,
because you've vetted what works and doesn't work, and you
(20:27):
can help people understand all of that. Do you want
to talk about any of these little boxes on here
because I found this such a cool tool.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Oh thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
I think that it just it lays it out step
by step, and you know, the mixed ages.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
And with this story I've read I can't even remember,
but some four year old and some eighty year old
playing cornhold again.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Yeah that was is Ray. He's ninety actually he's almost
ninety one now. But that's the thing that that's the
beauty of block party. It's just it's the intergenerational experience.
You know, it's just who what's ever on your road?
So we had our last block party, we had, you know,
a kid in the stroller, and we have Ray, you know,
(21:11):
who is a ninety and it's it's a unique experience
and you know, to have this mixedtages, so and everything
in between, everyone in between. And I think what's important
is so often teens and young adults, if they're back
living at home, they don't want to come. And so
it's really important that they come as well, because because.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Because they're well, so a seventeen year old dude, I
don't want to go a blog party, that's gooby. But
I bet when they go they end up having fun.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
They end up having fun.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
So Isaiah, give them a job, right like, have them
carry the cooler, have them right Like, that's a way
to get them out and maybe say, okay, just it's
maybe the block party's three hours, stay for two and
then you can go if you want to or something
like that. But the expectation needs to be there. They
don't on an opt out for the kids because it's
such a unique opportunity. Again, helping our tweens and teens
(22:06):
especially find agency and competency and capability is possible in
your own neighborhood. Right the mixed age play piece that
you can be an awkward thirteen year old, but to
the seven year old, you're a rock star, right Like.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
It's just it's and it's good. It's good for both.
Speaker 3 (22:24):
Never mind the whole neighborhood jobs you know that can
come out of babysitting, lawn cutting, you know all of that,
and that is a critical that's cool.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
Yeah, well we've touched on that and I think the
second piece of paper that Alex gave to me that
us send us off your website on them where it
came from. But it's very cool. It's one block party,
countless benefits and it's not a ven diagram, but it's
basically a a I was about to say.
Speaker 5 (22:56):
If you would, Vanessa was thinking the same thing I say.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Is mic off if Yeah, it's basically a diagram of
the ripple effect, which is cool, and the little ripples
are but I'm just going to name a few inside
where obviously the public first drop is the obvious stuff,
which is make new friends, create a neighborhood list, all that,
(23:24):
and then as the ripples go, the outside ripples the
extra effects. There's layers neighborhood play for children and all
of that, but not lonely, grounded supported sense of belonging
and joy. A connected neighborhood is more desirable for new buyers.
Very interesting part time paid work helps teenagers build agency
(23:47):
and confidence, play based instead of tech based childhood. Holy
smokes that one needs to have estimation points by it.
The point is it seems so simple, I have a
block party, get to know your neighbors. But as you
really beautifully illustrate through the ripple diagram is there's so
(24:08):
much more to it than just having a party. It's
all that happens as a result of it, and I
would argue there needs to be another ripple out here
that reminds us that it's really hard to be convinced
by the people in Silicon Valley and DC and on
(24:29):
Fox and CNN to hate somebody that you've hung out with,
hat a hot dog with, and you know you don't
vote the same, but they're your neighbor and they're human.
That that fixes so much.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
I'm thrilled that you see it as well, because it
is so powerful and it has the potential to do
so much we have. You know, we had at our
own block party, right, my husband and neighbor voted differently,
and they over.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
The smoke ribs. My husband made right.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
Your husband and your neighbor voted differently, Yeah, but smoked ribs.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Brought them together.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
I don't really care about the White House because these
boys are good exactly.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
It's just something so simple and it just gives us
an opportunity. We don't have those opportunities.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
And how fulfilling is that to your husband and his neighbor? Yeah? Really,
how much depth do they have in life now?
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Exactly?
Speaker 1 (25:29):
From the rib yep from block party and I go
back to we just did a small shop dog where
Alex they just tie together Alex, I think it's worth
talking about the fire thing.
Speaker 6 (25:45):
It's a foundation for individual rights and expression. Jonathan, the
Heights actually been involved them too, you know, as part
of the Yeah, so he's he's running some books with
Greg Luke and off they're wrote The Colleen and the American
Mind together.
Speaker 5 (25:58):
Yeah, so Greg's that had a fire.
Speaker 6 (26:00):
They're basically the leading country.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
Great, well in what you're doing. I encourage you to
kind of look at some of the data that they've
actually and again it's sixty eight thousand people they polled,
So we're not talking about they went to one college
and talked to one hundred kids. Right. I think you
could put China, Russia, North Korea, Iran and anybody else
(26:27):
who wants to fundamentally fight the Western way of living.
I think you could put them in one entire army
and attack us and to not be nearest dangerous. Really,
I genuine believe that that is less danger than the
fact that in some circles we have more than fifty
(26:50):
percent of our populace that think that shooting Donald Trump,
assassinating Donald Trump would be okay because of what he says.
It's terrifying, that's real, that's real math, that's real data.
That's what we've found out. That's what we talked about
on this chop talk because it's just stark. And look,
(27:10):
I'm not saying that to defend the things that come
out of Donald Trump. Wow.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Great, you don't have to agree with him. No, I
know that that's not okay.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
But it's not okay. That's not okay. But you but
you and I say that, But the data is showing
that the third of us say it is. Now, that's
where we've evolved today. And I left reading that I
can't quit thinking about it, and I'm you know, what's
(27:39):
the solution? And I mean, you can't. More. Censorship doesn't
help that, it makes it worse. So there's you know,
And then I read about you and I'm like, there
it is, seriously there it is human connection, understanding one another,
getting to know one another in a easy, non politically
(28:06):
or non culturally charged environment. And then once those barriers
start breaking down. So due to those numbers, I think,
and what lessons are we teaching our children with this
mess versus what lesson does a block party teach a kid?
Because you just told me that your spark for this
(28:30):
was when a neighbor brought over a pie when you
were six year old on one of your moves. That
was a lesson your neighbor taught you that probably led,
in some part, led to this. So what lessons are
teaching about not having block parties and talking around the
dinner table about how bad we hate the guy with
the sign in their front yard that we don't even know.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
I don't even know if we're talking about the dinner table.
Speaker 3 (28:53):
That's another whole thing, right, it's like talking it somewhere, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:57):
Talking about it the way year old compan works, but
still the same point. Yeah, yeah, So, I mean, I
think this block party thing is is awesome and it's
cool and it's fun and it's something everybody needs to do.
But I think we need to get our arms around.
These are the kinds of things that really do change
our society. And it's bottom up, normal folks engagement.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Yea, I love it, thank you?
Speaker 1 (29:22):
So what's next?
Speaker 3 (29:24):
So it's one hundred percent that it's getting the word out,
it's it's it's real life, Like as AI is expanding.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
We have to get off social media. We have to
get off the technology.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
It is literally killing us and our humanity, right, we
are losing our humanity and we don't know what's real
anymore and what's not.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Oh that's another scaredboard, right, and so.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
More in real life experiences are the most important thing
that we can do and to connect with each other.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
And is there a block party goal for this year? There?
Speaker 2 (29:57):
We just did.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
I just did a block party USA Back to School challenge.
I'm trying to get, yeah, states to compete with each other.
I actually have to look at I'm still taking the data.
It was ending on Sunday on National Good Neighbor Day,
not to date it, which is.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Seemly in this national Know your Neighbor Month or something.
Speaker 5 (30:17):
I don't know, but a National Good Neighbor Day?
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Yeah, is that what it was?
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Yeah? So and it ended then, and so I really
I'm thinking ahead to next year because it's our two
hundred and fiftieth as this country and since the declaration
of independence was signed? So what can we do?
Speaker 2 (30:34):
How can we So I'm in the brainstorming.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
Process of do you think you can foster next year?
Speaker 3 (30:40):
So, you know, fostering and not organizing, we could have
tens of thousands, right, it's possible, right, it is all
across this country. Twenty to thirty neighbors, it's possible. And again,
they need to be micro local. Right. When people sometimes
I say block party, they're like, oh yeah, you know
casts of hundreds, right, it's a town party. Those are fun,
(31:03):
but that's not what this is. This is that microlocal
neighborhood gathering.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
We'll be right back.
Speaker 3 (31:25):
So all across the country, right, if everyone, you know,
in a set of twenty neighbors did something, we could
change this country.
Speaker 6 (31:36):
Well, I've actually thought about it for our local chapters,
for this being one of the army activations that they
can think.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
This would be an excellent Army activation for the chapters.
I think it needs to almost be something we push.
I am absolutely so. I live in Midtown Memphis, which
is you know, all the houses are are between seventy
and one hundred and thirty years old. So it's that
(32:04):
kind of part of town that has always been kind
of the center of Memphis. Right, It's called Central Gardens.
Everything from some six seven thousand square foot really big, big,
big old houses to a lot of arts and crafts,
bungalows with all kinds of charm and everybody has a
front yard and anyway, my neighborhood has a July fourth
(32:30):
parade and it's an old fire truck and a bunch
of people pulling their kids and wagons, and there'll be
four or five hundred people walking through the streets and
it ends up at a place where there's a dunk
tank and some clowns and stuff. It's old school and
you chuckle, but it's fun. It's funny. My kids used
to like, do it right, really well. And two streets
(32:54):
north of us once a year flows off the access
to both ends of the road, and I say, ironically,
there's probably twenty five houses on that road, maybe twelve
thirteen on either side, maybe twenty five twenty six. And
they have a block party, and I can somebody hooks
up a speaker and dead in the middle of the street.
(33:15):
In the middle of that whole block, they have a
bouncy thing and maybe that's going overboard, but that's pretty
much all they have. And then it's a bunch of
kids and you can see a bunch of dads running
around in T shirts. There's Huggies on their beers, but
they're all drinking a beer. The kids have you can
tell they've been eating everything that's not good for them
(33:35):
because their faces are covered in sugary looking red crap.
And I imagine there's a few moms out there with
some wine and a solo cup and they're having a
lot of fun and they just make a mess of it.
And it is everybody on that road, just kind of
standing streeting in the yards, hanging out. And I've never
(33:58):
been a part of it. I'm not on that block,
but I've passed it.
Speaker 5 (34:02):
You could feel how sad villas are now, can't you feel?
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Well, no, big hugger, No, I've passed. I've driven past it,
and I've thought that is so cool, And that's all
I've put thought to it. And I never thought about
its ability to do the things that you've pointed out
it does. I've never thought about how simple it would
(34:25):
be to pull off. And I'm absolutely convinced that this
is just one of the greatest ideas I've heard because
it is so simple and anybody can do it, and
it breaks down the very barriers that I think are
tearing us apart.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
Thank you.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
Yeah, and the bouncy with the bouncy house, I say
no bouncy houses, but you know, if somebody's got a
bouncy house that they're willing to offer.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
You go with it, right, like.
Speaker 2 (34:49):
Company.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
I think he has company, so such one up.
Speaker 3 (34:53):
So it's not like we're not rigid right in terms
of what is okay. We just don't want people to
go out and spend five hundred dollars right at the point,
there is just there's no need for that. Right.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
Kids are going to have fun with and I have
seen them.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
They have cornhole all over the street. There's like six
of those things out there, and there's kids driving around
on big wheels or whatever the heck they are called now.
But yeah, it's so fun, awesome, and it is fun,
and it doesn't mean that you're gonna you get to
know your neighbors and they become your neighbors rather than
(35:24):
your foes, your political foes, your cultural whatever. It's awesome.
Speaker 3 (35:30):
One of the things we haven't talked about is how
your neighbors are really your first responders as well.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Oh, that's interesting that your neighbors are.
Speaker 3 (35:38):
The people that can be to you first and you
can call out and there is nothing like I share
the story of Dick Van Dyke. He was carried out
from the fires in California by his neighbors.
Speaker 2 (35:50):
That's how he was saved.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
And so that is to have someone that you can
go to in your neighborhood right next near you is
tremendously valuable.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
That's a very practical aspect of this, but just is important.
Speaker 6 (36:06):
And you talk about it with your neighbor the morning
you were super stressed out.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
Yeah, so specifically the morning, specifically, I was giving a
nine to eleven speech and at my high school. And
because my husband worked in Tower two and the plane
that crashed into his building was carrying a friend of mine,
(36:32):
his wife and his two year old and I'm so sorry,
thank you.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
So I honor him by telling my story.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
And I was my daughter was in kindergarten, and I
was stressed, emotionally stressed out right, running late. We get
to the end of the driveway, trying to get myself
ready in the morning, you know, not just in my
pajamas at the bus stop, right, get myself ready, get
her there. And we get to the end of the
driveway and I realize we've missed the bus, the school bus,
and for me to drive her to school and back
(37:02):
and I won't make it in time. So this neighbor,
who I had met but didn't really know. Was walking
saw me and saw my distress and said I'm happy
to drive her. And she got in her car, and
she went back, took her dog back home, came got
her And little things like that, right, she made a
(37:22):
huge difference in my life and and in my day right,
just as simple and so little little things like that
I have.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
I have a bunch of those stories.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Before shed But before she did that, did she say,
but first, I'd like to know how you voted in
the last rest of the plection exactly. I want to
know what you think about gay marriage before I take
your child to school there out.
Speaker 2 (37:43):
Exactly, or before I let my child in your car exactly.
Of course, it doesn't matter, that's the point being.
Speaker 6 (37:50):
Humans's an interesting type of poverty I heard somebody mentioned
in the last few years of I guess especially an
affluent neighborhoods. But I'm sure it happens Olsford too, Like
if your kid gets sick at school. These people are
literally calling like babysitters rather than family or friends. Like
back in the day you'd call your friend or your
I remember a neighbor, and now you just do hired
(38:11):
help because you're like both parents are grinding as these
fancy executives, and they don't have like friends who can
go pick up their kid.
Speaker 3 (38:17):
It's just crazy, which leads to the whole it's not
just kids' mental health right that I talk about. But
you know, doctor former Surgeon General, doctor Vi mcmarthy also
put out advisories about parental well being and caregiver well being.
And parents are not okay, and we don't And the
biggest indicator of a child's well being is the well
(38:39):
being of the parent and the primary caregiver. So a
parent's well being is key and critical, and so block
parties offer opportunity to build that village that we need
to be okay right and raise our kids and be healthy.
And so there's just there's so many, so many benefits.
Speaker 6 (39:00):
One thing a stat behind that that I think must
have been from you. You said it somewhere in the
prep of citing this study from Harvard the thirty six
percent of adults reported feeling lonely frequently or almost all
the time. Yeah, thirty six percent, Yeah, frequently or almost
all the time. And I've thought about this too with
(39:21):
my situation, which listeners know, unfortunately, my ex wanted a
divorce and the four kids and like that I got
and what do you model, you know, to your kids?
And it is really important to make these intentional efforts
of having neighbors over and other people over right, And
it's easy not to with the busyness of life. But
all these parents out there who are just feeling lonely
and are not modeling it well to their.
Speaker 5 (39:41):
Kids, I mean, you're basically screwing the next generation.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
Unfortunately.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
Right, It's it's and and it's it's really important. And
I feel like that number is higher than that. I
feel like half of half of all Americans is what
I had read, right.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
Maybe the thirty six the ones that admit it.
Speaker 3 (39:59):
Right, Yeah, it's really it's it's a struggle. And you know,
we look to social media for connection.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
In case the place, especially now because AI you may
be finding connection with a bot.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Dangerous.
Speaker 1 (40:17):
Well, there's no bot at the block party exactly. They
put together kind of a cool robot, like a kid.
Speaker 6 (40:26):
Eventually they're going to make our block parties easier.
Speaker 5 (40:28):
The bots can do all the work. We can just
enjoy the block one day.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
Unbelievable. So somebody's listening to me. I hope a whole
bunch of somebody's listen to me right now saying okay,
I'm convinced. Let's do a block party. How do they
find you?
Speaker 2 (40:43):
So if they go to block party USA dot org
is the website?
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Got it? And do you do a zoom with How
does that work?
Speaker 3 (40:53):
So I once want well right now and back to
once a month. And if they go on, if they
sign up to receive my updates, they'll get the time
and date for it, and I just have a zoom
link and they join.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
The costs to any of this, no cost, no you
all this just to be kind and fix our.
Speaker 5 (41:13):
Culture, she said, bloody do gooder.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
You are a bloody do gooder.
Speaker 5 (41:18):
She's willing to share her email address to people want to.
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Get in touch with you. How do they email?
Speaker 2 (41:24):
The best way is info at block PARTYUSA dot org?
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Got it?
Speaker 3 (41:28):
Or I have forms on the website too, like if
they have specific questions, you'll get to them.
Speaker 1 (41:32):
Just go You'll help and they can zoom with you
at some point ye if they would need to.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
There's one thing too, I'm working on how to guide
for organizations, houses of worship, towns and cities. How to
bring this idea to their communities.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
Certainly houses of worship only make sense. That would be easy.
And you said towns and cities, Yeah, they have like
a citywide block party.
Speaker 2 (41:57):
No, to encourage their citizens to dream.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
It's an idea.
Speaker 3 (42:00):
So it's basically to get them to bring the idea.
So like your local chapters, they would bring this idea, right,
and so other organizations can bring this idea today, Alex.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
Seriously, the whole local chapter thing, this needs to be
one of the focus.
Speaker 5 (42:16):
I was actually about to say earlier too.
Speaker 6 (42:19):
Even for you Army members listening who aren't starting chapters
in your community, you can still do the block parties too.
It's actually kind of a cool way of testing it out, like, hey,
let me see about doing some more stuff in my
community and hopefully do more after that.
Speaker 1 (42:30):
Here it is. I'll bet they'll be one of them.
I'll bet they'll be a block party in Atlanta from
a certain subbody after this episode. I'll bet you it
what you got.
Speaker 6 (42:40):
So I thought it was very cool the email he
sent me yesterday, Just the connectivity of the Army. Yeah,
so Vanessa emailed me Hi Alex getting ready to board
my flight and finally had to listen to send you
these photos. As I was listening to past episodes, I
cannot believe it when I saw Tim Brown and then
she sent me a bunch of photos of him and
said I'm on a see had a loss for words,
(43:01):
and then we actually uncovered even something deeper in the
car driving over here talking about it.
Speaker 5 (43:06):
Why did you Why did you share it? Vanessa? Well,
it was just that how did you get to know Tim?
Your expense at Tim? And then where we found out?
Speaker 3 (43:15):
I couldn't it was it was a yeah, it was
a powerful episode and I was just anyway. So my
friend Pete who I mentioned, who was killed on nine
to eleven, I became really close with his mom, Unice Marguerite,
and she had never been to a nine to eleven museum,
even though we live, you know, an hour away, and
so we made a plan three years ago in November
(43:37):
to go and we called there were there are two
other women that were with me.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
Call ourselves Team Marguerite and this guy Mac.
Speaker 3 (43:46):
Who is with the Victim Assistant Witness program and so
he'd be He connected us with Tim Brown, and I
think Unics had already met Tim before were and so
we spent two days at the nine to eleven museum,
the Greek Orthodox Church that had just opened or was
(44:08):
about to open, and also Ahara's. We went and had
lunch there at the at the pub that he mentioned,
and right before you know, my Greet's ninetieth birthday. She
fell dis May and her funeral was May eighth, and
Tim wasn't able to come because he was traveling. And
(44:32):
I looked back through the text in the car ride
and he said he was in Denver and then going
to be in Memphis.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
He was doing our show was.
Speaker 2 (44:41):
On May eighth.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
What a ray small world.
Speaker 5 (44:46):
That crazy, unbelievable and if people haven't.
Speaker 2 (44:52):
Everybody has, Oh two of.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
Both of them, Yeah, they were really My husband and
I listened to both of them in the car right
up to Vermont on Friday, and it was really impactful
on my husband, who is I'm going to connect him
with him, He's going to do some work on this
because it's so important to not only never forget.
Speaker 2 (45:16):
In our homes and in our schools, but also never
forget what cause right the hate of the other.
Speaker 1 (45:23):
That caused this. Maybe we should have a block party, definitely,
Maybe we should have a block party, and we need
to open up some block party Middle East things and
some block party Oversees things, and I mean metaphorically, a
block party can fix all of it.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Be so happy if.
Speaker 1 (45:46):
You well, we'll just see each other's human beings. Yes,
what it's about it is. Thank you so much, Vanessa.
You are awesome. Vanessa Elias, founder of block Party USA
from Wilt, Connecticut, but shedding her light and ideas around
the world in our country. And I hope each of
(46:08):
you listening today will consider looking up black Party USA
and pulling one off in your own community for the
good of yourselves, your family, your neighborhoods, your neighbors, and
our culture. Because if we don't start doing more stuff
like this, I fear of where it leads. There are
always answers, and it starts with an army and normal
(46:31):
folks that are willing to do the simple things. And
this is simple and effective. And I got to do
is get in touch with Vanessa and she'll tell you
how to pull it off. Thanks for being here.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
Thank you so much for having me in for the
work you do.
Speaker 1 (46:45):
It's been awesome. Thanks, and thank you for joining us
this week. If Vanessa Elias has inspired you in general,
or better yet, to take action by hosts a block
party in your neighborhood, organizing a community wide block party movement,
(47:05):
or something else entirely. Please let me know. I'd love
to hear about it. You can write me anytime at
Bill at normalfolks dot us and I will respond. If
you enjoyed this episode.
Speaker 4 (47:18):
Share of friends, share it on social, subscribe to the podcast,
rate it, review it, join the army at normalfolks dot us,
any and all of these things that will help us
grow an army of normal folks.
Speaker 1 (47:31):
I'm Bill Courtney. Until next time, do what you can
Everybody. It's Bill Courtney with an army and normal folks.
And we continue now with part two of our conversation
with Vanessa Elias, right after these brief messages from our
general sponsors, back to twenty sixteen, all of this that
(00:28):
we just unpacked, and your answer.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Is block party.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Let's have a party. There's incivility on Facebook and people
hate each other, so let's have a party.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
That's right, but it has to be so the whole
purpose was to get neighborhood free play.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
So we had brought.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
In, so we listened this woman and I had heard
Peter Gray speak and he is a research psychologist out
of Boston College, and we'd heard him in a neighboring
town maybe the year before.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
And we left.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
Depressed because basically, you left so depressed because basically he
was saying, if your neighborhood doesn't have kids playing, move
like that was our that was like our option because
and you went.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Through like, or if your neighborhood didn't have kids playing,
start them playing right well, than.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
It was basically that's what we saw the answer. But
he laid out the right the decrease in play and
the rise and anxiety and depression really kids. Yeah, and
it's very clear. The data points are there. It's very clear.
And so some of the parents in the grade was
at a nursery school and some of the parents were asking,
you know, and at that age, it's easy. Don't sign
them up for travel soccer when they're seven years old, right,
(01:41):
get them.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
To have play dates. But even play dates, you're stuck
with that same kid.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
So in terms of the normal neighborhood play, if someone's
being a jerk, you're like, forget it, I'm leap right.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
You can't do that if you have a kid over.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
If you're you know, what's interesting that you just said,
don't try to sign your kid up for travel soccer
when they're seven. Just let them have fun. You know.
I don't guess you're a huge football fan because you
evoked ballet before you said football, all right, But I
bet you it's all right. You've lived all over Europe
and everything. You're probably a bigger soccer fan than American
(02:13):
football fan. But I bet you've heard the name Manning,
Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Archie Manning. So even people that
don't know football know the word Manning. All right. Do
you know that Archie Manning would not let his sons
play tackle football or competitive football until lighth grade. Brilliant,
(02:34):
probably the royal family of American football, three generations, super
Bowl winners, Heisman candidates with a grandson now that has
a four million dollar l at the University of Texas
to play college football. That is, this family did not
let their PIDs play competitive tackle football until lighth grade.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Which is the age most kids burn out because they've
been playing it.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
Incredible, So when you say don't sign up your kid
for competitive soccer as six, that's what clicked in my mind.
And the point is let kids be kids, exactly, Let
them be creative, let them get hurt a little bit,
let them bounce around in the neighborhoods. But before you
do that, you have to have connectivity in the neighborhood
(03:24):
for the kids to go into exactly. So you left
the Scout oppressed.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
So we left its lovely. Peter Gray is lovely, said.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
Let's crawl fish.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
But we left depressed because we felt powerless, right like,
how are we going to change this?
Speaker 2 (03:46):
How are we going to make this different?
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Right? Yeah, So that's when we developed this free Play
task Force. We had them come speak to our town.
We invited all the stakeholders in town, like from the
y m c A, the superintendent, all the principles, all
you know, rotary club, city Council, Bordis, Luckmen, Bordify everybody,
some teachers, and he spoke the most amazing. Our superintendent
(04:09):
stood up and at the end and said I'm in
and that changed everything.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
I'm in.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
He's got five kids of his own and he set
the tone. And with that, we developed the Free Play
Task Force to educate our community on why it's so
important that kids have free play. We worked to extend recess,
worked with Leonor Scanesia let Grow to develop free play clubs,
and you know, just just launched this whole initiative. But
we needed something for neighborhoods and so I was like, yes,
(04:38):
finally I can do this, and so yeah, we launched
Wilton's Big Block Party Weekends. The first weekend was in
June of twenty eighteen. We did two weekends book nding
the summer to get you know, people could choose what
you know, what worked best for them and your block.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
You were encouraging neighbor the hotel across your entire community
on their block. So are you telling me in this
town there were block parties all over the place on this.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
Weekends there was there were at least forty block parties.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Forty yeah, are you kidding? That is so? What's what's
the geographical idea of a quote block party?
Speaker 3 (05:17):
In generally in general, it's ten to twenty of your
closest neighbors.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
So it is whether you share.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
A wall with them right in an apartment building or
condo complex, right or whatever, or they're two miles down
the road, they're still your neighbors. And so ten to
twenty of your closest neighbors. And it was a huge success,
and it was has become a tradition for families. It
has the feedback that I got from it, you know,
(05:47):
from little kids saying it was the best day of
their lives to.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yeah, a block party best day, yeah right, not Christmas?
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Right, it's literally what they said. They were so excited
them for the next year and wanted to put the
flyers out and yeah, so wow, it was so it
was I guess he was ten years old, don you At.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
What point did this idea that became these forty block
par days all over your town? At what point, did
you say I might have.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
A thing here when other towns nearby asked how we
did it?
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Wanted to know more about the.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Fact the other towns here.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
I get, well, we were getting national attention, were you
really at the time? Yeah, we did.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
We had PBS News Hour, we were being filmed.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
This is so simple, it's it's so simple.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
It's so simple, and it's so actionable. And every single
every single person has a neighbor and every single person
can do this. It's so actionable, right, there's no ringing
of the hands and what do we do? How do
we sol like this is something anybody can do.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
So the neighboring community started you saying how'd you do this?
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Yeah? Had you know? Asking questions.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
I kept hearing more and more stories of the impact
of the singular block party, or what I call now
the block party ripple effect, you know, all the things
that end up coming, right, not just the party is fun,
but it's about what comes after. And there were stories
that brought tears.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
To my eyes. Get you know, and.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
I've read a couple and I was just like, holy smut.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Yeah, So so that and then just this date, you know,
the state of the nation Basically I realized this is
something we need nationwide, and this is something that is
actionable again by every single person. So so I launched
block Party USA in twenty twenty three.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Finally I talked about it for about two years.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
When I read that, I went back to my teen
years and I thought of MTV of felt like a
block Party USA thing. There's some like guitar music in
the background or something, But I did I thought, that
feels like nineteen eighty six to me, And thank god,
(08:13):
it does feel like nineteen eighty six to me, to
a simpler time really in terms of our humanity and
even when we disagreed with each other, how we interacted
and it just good. Block Party USA just kind of
brought a smile out about face. I think it's hilarious.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Thank you, So tell me what is what is it now?
So what does it growing too? From them?
Speaker 3 (08:37):
Yeah? So now it is a nichewide movement and it is,
as I say, is a free, simple and actionable cure
for our country's loneliness, social isolation, divisiveness, and the youth
mental health crisis.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Say that one more time. That is really important.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Yeah, it is block Party USA. Is a simple, free
and actionable cure for our country's loneliness, social isolation, divisiveness,
and the youth mental health crisis.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
And inability, which is yeah, which is where the start
and incibility exactly freaking awesome. So it's only two years old. Yep,
not the block Party, but Block Party USA.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Yeah, and people love the idea. People have forgotten about
block parties, right, people they were a thing of their child.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I forgot about block parties, So tell me what it's doing.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
So yeah, So it's it's been really exciting because it
resonates with people. It resonates with people because it's a
fond memory of their childhood and it's something that they
know that they can do that it's actionable. And so
I have people signed up from forty six states in Washington,
d c. And a couple of other countries Nairobi or
(10:03):
Kenya and what. Yeah, I signed up that are interested
and so you know, part of for a little what
Canada as well and.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
For a little WI.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
I was like, oh, I shouldn't have put us, but
you know that's my that's my focus and people can
adopt it.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
It's about neighborhood gatherings.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
So yeah, so as part of doctor Vivic H. Murphy's
Quote Recipes for Connections initiatives, the Office of the US
Surgeon General features two year old Block Party USA as
a resource that supports building social connection through gathering. Wow.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Yeah, that was pretty awesome. It was really exciting.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
How did that happen?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
I don't actually know.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
I ask you're just hanging out having block for.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
I did ask Jennifer Wallace, the author I mentioned earlier,
because I know she was working with him on something,
and I said, were you the very bit told doctor
Murphy about it, but she said, no, you already knew
about it.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
So I don't.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
I feel really grateful, and it helped amplify because I
think the most important thing is just and that's why
I so appreciate talking to you is just amplifying this message.
It's so actionable for people to do, and it's just
that we just have to bring it back into their
consciousness and my job is to sort of hold their
hands they.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
As they go, Okay, I got lots more questions. Yeah,
and we're also going to talk about these things, which
I found vastly interesting. But I think now's good time
for this. We had our first block party in September.
It was so much fun and we had an excellent turnout.
I've lived on this street for many years and know
most of the neighbors, but it was great to meet
(11:47):
the others and to all hang out together. We tend
to do this again the summer. We even set up
a Facebook page for our neighborhood. A second person said,
we organized the block party with short notice, and we're
pleasantly surprised at how how easy it was to plan
and how many people came. People of all ages responded,
and we met other families with kids that we would
(12:07):
not have known otherwise. Everyone brought a snack to share
and coolers with their drinks. We had tons of fun
playing cornhole and the kids had a massive water balloon fight.
Oh no, someone might get their eye poked out. Sorry,
I was just that was my embellishment. They drenched the
parents and really everyone got involved. We look forward to
(12:27):
doing it again this year. Third after our block party,
our street changed. Kids are actually playing outside together. Everyone
from young couples to families to seniors are in their
yards more. I see more people out walking their dogs.
Neighbors go out of their way to say hello, stop
and talk and help one another. Allan, it's the same
(12:48):
people who I guarantee you on last election, some had
Trump and some had harisions in the yard yep, and
they don't care so much about that anymore. But if
you don't know the person with that Trump sign or
that air sign in your front yard, you may come
up with some preconceived notions about those people that are
(13:09):
completely false. And the way you find out if they're
false or not is.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
You get to know them in real life.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
In real life, how do you feel when you hear
people saying.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
That it's what gives my life meaning and purpose? It
makes me I'm tearing up again because it's just so
meaningful and it's just I mean, I think that's what
we underestimate, is the power of one person making a
difference in other people's lives. So that person that organized
that block party made a difference in everyone's lives.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
There, you mean, just a normal person, Just.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
A normal person exactly doing what they can do.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
So I could call some neighbors right now and say
let's have a block party. I don't really need block
party to say for that. That was my initial thought
until I started reading Born. Researching Born, I got some
handy dandy stuff that Alex got off your website that
you sent us.
Speaker 5 (14:10):
I did well today.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Why does block Party USA as an organization matter to
people who want block parties? Catch it?
Speaker 3 (14:18):
I think people are really busy, okay, and they're not
They want to do something, but they're not actually sure
how to do it. And so my I see, my
role is making it easy for them.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Right. We are all overtasked, over, over stressed over.
Speaker 5 (14:32):
Everything, right, and I got a bandwidth?
Speaker 3 (14:34):
What one more thing? You're asking me to do? One
more thing?
Speaker 6 (14:37):
Right?
Speaker 3 (14:37):
And so how to make it as easy as possible
for people is the first thing. We'll be right back,
(15:00):
and how to make it most success right, Like you
can have a block party, but without the name tags
and the contact list, it's just it doesn't have you know,
there's so much more potential I guess when you have
those things. So just putting those in people's minds. The
other piece is that we live in a very procured
(15:21):
through social media perfectionist environment like what we think it
needs to be. And to have someone in your ear
constantly saying keep it simple, keep it simple, keep it simple,
and you don't need that, right, This is just a gathering,
and to keep helping people focus on just the fact
of bringing people together. You're acting it's a service, and
(15:43):
this is not a party to impress, it's a party
to connect.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
When I read that, I thought about the fact that
when Lisa and I got married in nineteen ninety one,
we did it in a church. We had our reception
at the church. She had a lovely dress, we had
a nice cake. A bunch of people came. It was
lovely and beautiful. There were a few flowers on the altar,
(16:08):
and I'm certain maybe a couple of arrangements at our
wedding at our reception church, and then we got in
a car and drove off and it probably lasted three
or four hours and costs I don't know, twenty five
hundred and three thousand bucks, maybe if you count the
finger food and the cake. And today a wedding is
(16:28):
a week long event.
Speaker 6 (16:30):
So years year long event. You've been to engagement parties
and made for even.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Yeah, we've had engaging parties, but there's a cap on
what we do because of what I'm saying. But the
point is, I feel like we've lost sight of the
fact that we're supposed to be celebrating the union of
a young couple, and that's what it's there for. Now
it's become almost an excuse to engage in excesses to
(16:58):
a whole different realf I could go off on, but
I've got a daughter getting married. I've already married off
one saw this marriage, so I've been through all of it.
And I certainly am not trying to disparage people who
want their children to have a lovely day. But the
point is, I think we can lose sight of what
(17:18):
the point is behind a marriage. And when I was
reading your block party thing metaphorically, that's kind of came
up with my mind, which is what you're saying is
it's not about the biggest balloons. It's not about making
sure the venue is absolutely perfect, it's not about spending
a whole bunch of money on a bunch of crap.
It's simply about getting your neighbors together. So keep it
(17:42):
simple and just make it. Let the people make it fun,
not the crap that you bring in. That's kind of
what I was getting from you on that. Is that
not right?
Speaker 3 (17:52):
It's one hundred percent right because those wedding right at
what cost?
Speaker 4 (17:57):
Right?
Speaker 3 (17:58):
And I don't mean financial costs. I mean like the
effort and the stress and all that stuff. It's sort
of like kid anxiety birthday parties, now right, they are
so over the top.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Why can't we just have a pizza and a cake
and a park and call it that.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
We did old fat like old fashion on birth that
we had games for my youngest party.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
The kids loved it. Then her friends would be like, can.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
I have a party?
Speaker 3 (18:19):
Like?
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Right?
Speaker 5 (18:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
It was pintail and a donkey.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
It was a donut, you know, with your hands behind
your back, grab it trying to.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Eat it.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
For apple.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Exactly exactly. Swap in DNA.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Yeah, oh god. Yeah. What would the Swiss say about that?
Speaker 3 (18:37):
They wouldn't say anything first.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
So yes, one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
But with block parties, what I've so one of I
have these monthly sometimes weekly depending on the time of year,
office hours and block party zooms so people can come
ask any questions, yeah, just to have like you know,
they ask it some support. And one of them, one
woman came, I think she's from Pennsylvania, and she said,
(19:04):
I am a reluctant block party organizer, and I was
like okay, and she explained that the two women that
had done it for years had stepped down because it
was just too much.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
And so that is the cost, right, if.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
We overly manufacture this, engineer it. We've got a band
and volunteer sign ups and we've got that, like it's
a production. That's not what this is about, right, That's
what I mean.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
About the weddings. When it's more about the production than
the celebration of the marriage, you're missing a point. Yeah,
and that's the point with the block party. Yeah, here's
another reason why block party. This little one pager I loved.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Thanks.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Uh, it's block party, who say how to organize a
block party? It's easier than you think, and it's got
some headings with little boxes around it, but it says
keep it simple, don't go at it alone, select today,
go big, go small. Location. You need a permit, name, tags,
and sign in sheet, so you're building a database in
(20:06):
your community. Invite mixed ages, which I think you have
to speak on food and here's the best one, bubbles
chalk and a kickball. This is why block party, I say,
because you've vetted what works and doesn't work, and you
(20:27):
can help people understand all of that. Do you want
to talk about any of these little boxes on here
because I found this such a cool tool.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Oh thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
I think that it just it lays it out step
by step, and you know, the mixed ages.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
And with this story I've read I can't even remember,
but some four year old and some eighty year old
playing cornhold again.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Yeah that was is Ray. He's ninety actually he's almost
ninety one now. But that's the thing that that's the
beauty of block party. It's just it's the intergenerational experience.
You know, it's just who what's ever on your road?
So we had our last block party, we had, you know,
a kid in the stroller, and we have Ray, you know,
(21:11):
who is a ninety and it's it's a unique experience
and you know, to have this mixedtages, so and everything
in between, everyone in between. And I think what's important
is so often teens and young adults, if they're back
living at home, they don't want to come. And so
it's really important that they come as well, because because.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Because they're well, so a seventeen year old dude, I
don't want to go a blog party, that's gooby. But
I bet when they go they end up having fun.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
They end up having fun.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
So Isaiah, give them a job, right like, have them
carry the cooler, have them right Like, that's a way
to get them out and maybe say, okay, just it's
maybe the block party's three hours, stay for two and
then you can go if you want to or something
like that. But the expectation needs to be there. They
don't on an opt out for the kids because it's
such a unique opportunity. Again, helping our tweens and teens
(22:06):
especially find agency and competency and capability is possible in
your own neighborhood. Right the mixed age play piece that
you can be an awkward thirteen year old, but to
the seven year old, you're a rock star, right Like.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
It's just it's and it's good. It's good for both.
Speaker 3 (22:24):
Never mind the whole neighborhood jobs you know that can
come out of babysitting, lawn cutting, you know all of that,
and that is a critical that's cool.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
Yeah, well we've touched on that and I think the
second piece of paper that Alex gave to me that
us send us off your website on them where it
came from. But it's very cool. It's one block party,
countless benefits and it's not a ven diagram, but it's
basically a a I was about to say.
Speaker 5 (22:56):
If you would, Vanessa was thinking the same thing I say.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Is mic off if Yeah, it's basically a diagram of
the ripple effect, which is cool, and the little ripples
are but I'm just going to name a few inside
where obviously the public first drop is the obvious stuff,
which is make new friends, create a neighborhood list, all that,
(23:24):
and then as the ripples go, the outside ripples the
extra effects. There's layers neighborhood play for children and all
of that, but not lonely, grounded supported sense of belonging
and joy. A connected neighborhood is more desirable for new buyers.
Very interesting part time paid work helps teenagers build agency
(23:47):
and confidence, play based instead of tech based childhood. Holy
smokes that one needs to have estimation points by it.
The point is it seems so simple, I have a
block party, get to know your neighbors. But as you
really beautifully illustrate through the ripple diagram is there's so
(24:08):
much more to it than just having a party. It's
all that happens as a result of it, and I
would argue there needs to be another ripple out here
that reminds us that it's really hard to be convinced
by the people in Silicon Valley and DC and on
(24:29):
Fox and CNN to hate somebody that you've hung out with,
hat a hot dog with, and you know you don't
vote the same, but they're your neighbor and they're human.
That that fixes so much.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
I'm thrilled that you see it as well, because it
is so powerful and it has the potential to do
so much we have. You know, we had at our
own block party, right, my husband and neighbor voted differently,
and they over.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
The smoke ribs. My husband made right.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
Your husband and your neighbor voted differently, Yeah, but smoked ribs.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Brought them together.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
I don't really care about the White House because these
boys are good exactly.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
It's just something so simple and it just gives us
an opportunity. We don't have those opportunities.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
And how fulfilling is that to your husband and his neighbor? Yeah? Really,
how much depth do they have in life now?
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Exactly?
Speaker 1 (25:29):
From the rib yep from block party and I go
back to we just did a small shop dog where
Alex they just tie together Alex, I think it's worth
talking about the fire thing.
Speaker 6 (25:45):
It's a foundation for individual rights and expression. Jonathan, the
Heights actually been involved them too, you know, as part
of the Yeah, so he's he's running some books with
Greg Luke and off they're wrote The Colleen and the American
Mind together.
Speaker 5 (25:58):
Yeah, so Greg's that had a fire.
Speaker 6 (26:00):
They're basically the leading country.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
Great, well in what you're doing. I encourage you to
kind of look at some of the data that they've
actually and again it's sixty eight thousand people they polled,
So we're not talking about they went to one college
and talked to one hundred kids. Right. I think you
could put China, Russia, North Korea, Iran and anybody else
(26:27):
who wants to fundamentally fight the Western way of living.
I think you could put them in one entire army
and attack us and to not be nearest dangerous. Really,
I genuine believe that that is less danger than the
fact that in some circles we have more than fifty
(26:50):
percent of our populace that think that shooting Donald Trump,
assassinating Donald Trump would be okay because of what he says.
It's terrifying, that's real, that's real math, that's real data.
That's what we've found out. That's what we talked about
on this chop talk because it's just stark. And look,
(27:10):
I'm not saying that to defend the things that come
out of Donald Trump. Wow.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Great, you don't have to agree with him. No, I
know that that's not okay.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
But it's not okay. That's not okay. But you but
you and I say that, But the data is showing
that the third of us say it is. Now, that's
where we've evolved today. And I left reading that I
can't quit thinking about it, and I'm you know, what's
(27:39):
the solution? And I mean, you can't. More. Censorship doesn't
help that, it makes it worse. So there's you know,
And then I read about you and I'm like, there
it is, seriously there it is human connection, understanding one another,
getting to know one another in a easy, non politically
(28:06):
or non culturally charged environment. And then once those barriers
start breaking down. So due to those numbers, I think,
and what lessons are we teaching our children with this
mess versus what lesson does a block party teach a kid?
Because you just told me that your spark for this
(28:30):
was when a neighbor brought over a pie when you
were six year old on one of your moves. That
was a lesson your neighbor taught you that probably led,
in some part, led to this. So what lessons are
teaching about not having block parties and talking around the
dinner table about how bad we hate the guy with
the sign in their front yard that we don't even know.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
I don't even know if we're talking about the dinner table.
Speaker 3 (28:53):
That's another whole thing, right, it's like talking it somewhere, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:57):
Talking about it the way year old compan works, but
still the same point. Yeah, yeah, So, I mean, I
think this block party thing is is awesome and it's
cool and it's fun and it's something everybody needs to do.
But I think we need to get our arms around.
These are the kinds of things that really do change
our society. And it's bottom up, normal folks engagement.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Yea, I love it, thank you?
Speaker 1 (29:22):
So what's next?
Speaker 3 (29:24):
So it's one hundred percent that it's getting the word out,
it's it's it's real life, Like as AI is expanding.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
We have to get off social media. We have to
get off the technology.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
It is literally killing us and our humanity, right, we
are losing our humanity and we don't know what's real
anymore and what's not.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Oh that's another scaredboard, right, and so.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
More in real life experiences are the most important thing
that we can do and to connect with each other.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
And is there a block party goal for this year? There?
Speaker 2 (29:57):
We just did.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
I just did a block party USA Back to School challenge.
I'm trying to get, yeah, states to compete with each other.
I actually have to look at I'm still taking the data.
It was ending on Sunday on National Good Neighbor Day,
not to date it, which is.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Seemly in this national Know your Neighbor Month or something.
Speaker 5 (30:17):
I don't know, but a National Good Neighbor Day?
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Yeah, is that what it was?
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Yeah? So and it ended then, and so I really
I'm thinking ahead to next year because it's our two
hundred and fiftieth as this country and since the declaration
of independence was signed? So what can we do?
Speaker 2 (30:34):
How can we So I'm in the brainstorming.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
Process of do you think you can foster next year?
Speaker 3 (30:40):
So, you know, fostering and not organizing, we could have
tens of thousands, right, it's possible, right, it is all
across this country. Twenty to thirty neighbors, it's possible. And again,
they need to be micro local. Right. When people sometimes
I say block party, they're like, oh yeah, you know
casts of hundreds, right, it's a town party. Those are fun,
(31:03):
but that's not what this is. This is that microlocal
neighborhood gathering.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
We'll be right back.
Speaker 3 (31:25):
So all across the country, right, if everyone, you know,
in a set of twenty neighbors did something, we could
change this country.
Speaker 6 (31:36):
Well, I've actually thought about it for our local chapters,
for this being one of the army activations that they
can think.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
This would be an excellent Army activation for the chapters.
I think it needs to almost be something we push.
I am absolutely so. I live in Midtown Memphis, which
is you know, all the houses are are between seventy
and one hundred and thirty years old. So it's that
(32:04):
kind of part of town that has always been kind
of the center of Memphis. Right, It's called Central Gardens.
Everything from some six seven thousand square foot really big, big,
big old houses to a lot of arts and crafts,
bungalows with all kinds of charm and everybody has a
front yard and anyway, my neighborhood has a July fourth
(32:30):
parade and it's an old fire truck and a bunch
of people pulling their kids and wagons, and there'll be
four or five hundred people walking through the streets and
it ends up at a place where there's a dunk
tank and some clowns and stuff. It's old school and
you chuckle, but it's fun. It's funny. My kids used
to like, do it right, really well. And two streets
(32:54):
north of us once a year flows off the access
to both ends of the road, and I say, ironically,
there's probably twenty five houses on that road, maybe twelve
thirteen on either side, maybe twenty five twenty six. And
they have a block party, and I can somebody hooks
up a speaker and dead in the middle of the street.
(33:15):
In the middle of that whole block, they have a
bouncy thing and maybe that's going overboard, but that's pretty
much all they have. And then it's a bunch of
kids and you can see a bunch of dads running
around in T shirts. There's Huggies on their beers, but
they're all drinking a beer. The kids have you can
tell they've been eating everything that's not good for them
(33:35):
because their faces are covered in sugary looking red crap.
And I imagine there's a few moms out there with
some wine and a solo cup and they're having a
lot of fun and they just make a mess of it.
And it is everybody on that road, just kind of
standing streeting in the yards, hanging out. And I've never
(33:58):
been a part of it. I'm not on that block,
but I've passed it.
Speaker 5 (34:02):
You could feel how sad villas are now, can't you feel?
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Well, no, big hugger, No, I've passed. I've driven past it,
and I've thought that is so cool, And that's all
I've put thought to it. And I never thought about
its ability to do the things that you've pointed out
it does. I've never thought about how simple it would
(34:25):
be to pull off. And I'm absolutely convinced that this
is just one of the greatest ideas I've heard because
it is so simple and anybody can do it, and
it breaks down the very barriers that I think are
tearing us apart.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
Thank you.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
Yeah, and the bouncy with the bouncy house, I say
no bouncy houses, but you know, if somebody's got a
bouncy house that they're willing to offer.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
You go with it, right, like.
Speaker 2 (34:49):
Company.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
I think he has company, so such one up.
Speaker 3 (34:53):
So it's not like we're not rigid right in terms
of what is okay. We just don't want people to
go out and spend five hundred dollars right at the point,
there is just there's no need for that. Right.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
Kids are going to have fun with and I have
seen them.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
They have cornhole all over the street. There's like six
of those things out there, and there's kids driving around
on big wheels or whatever the heck they are called now.
But yeah, it's so fun, awesome, and it is fun,
and it doesn't mean that you're gonna you get to
know your neighbors and they become your neighbors rather than
(35:24):
your foes, your political foes, your cultural whatever. It's awesome.
Speaker 3 (35:30):
One of the things we haven't talked about is how
your neighbors are really your first responders as well.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Oh, that's interesting that your neighbors are.
Speaker 3 (35:38):
The people that can be to you first and you
can call out and there is nothing like I share
the story of Dick Van Dyke. He was carried out
from the fires in California by his neighbors.
Speaker 2 (35:50):
That's how he was saved.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
And so that is to have someone that you can
go to in your neighborhood right next near you is
tremendously valuable.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
That's a very practical aspect of this, but just is important.
Speaker 6 (36:06):
And you talk about it with your neighbor the morning
you were super stressed out.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
Yeah, so specifically the morning, specifically, I was giving a
nine to eleven speech and at my high school. And
because my husband worked in Tower two and the plane
that crashed into his building was carrying a friend of mine,
(36:32):
his wife and his two year old and I'm so sorry,
thank you.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
So I honor him by telling my story.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
And I was my daughter was in kindergarten, and I
was stressed, emotionally stressed out right, running late. We get
to the end of the driveway, trying to get myself
ready in the morning, you know, not just in my
pajamas at the bus stop, right, get myself ready, get
her there. And we get to the end of the
driveway and I realize we've missed the bus, the school bus,
and for me to drive her to school and back
(37:02):
and I won't make it in time. So this neighbor,
who I had met but didn't really know. Was walking
saw me and saw my distress and said I'm happy
to drive her. And she got in her car, and
she went back, took her dog back home, came got
her And little things like that, right, she made a
(37:22):
huge difference in my life and and in my day right,
just as simple and so little little things like that
I have.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
I have a bunch of those stories.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Before shed But before she did that, did she say,
but first, I'd like to know how you voted in
the last rest of the plection exactly. I want to
know what you think about gay marriage before I take
your child to school there out.
Speaker 2 (37:43):
Exactly, or before I let my child in your car exactly.
Of course, it doesn't matter, that's the point being.
Speaker 6 (37:50):
Humans's an interesting type of poverty I heard somebody mentioned
in the last few years of I guess especially an
affluent neighborhoods. But I'm sure it happens Olsford too, Like
if your kid gets sick at school. These people are
literally calling like babysitters rather than family or friends. Like
back in the day you'd call your friend or your
I remember a neighbor, and now you just do hired
(38:11):
help because you're like both parents are grinding as these
fancy executives, and they don't have like friends who can
go pick up their kid.
Speaker 3 (38:17):
It's just crazy, which leads to the whole it's not
just kids' mental health right that I talk about. But
you know, doctor former Surgeon General, doctor Vi mcmarthy also
put out advisories about parental well being and caregiver well being.
And parents are not okay, and we don't And the
biggest indicator of a child's well being is the well
(38:39):
being of the parent and the primary caregiver. So a
parent's well being is key and critical, and so block
parties offer opportunity to build that village that we need
to be okay right and raise our kids and be healthy.
And so there's just there's so many, so many benefits.
Speaker 6 (39:00):
One thing a stat behind that that I think must
have been from you. You said it somewhere in the
prep of citing this study from Harvard the thirty six
percent of adults reported feeling lonely frequently or almost all
the time. Yeah, thirty six percent, Yeah, frequently or almost
all the time. And I've thought about this too with
(39:21):
my situation, which listeners know, unfortunately, my ex wanted a
divorce and the four kids and like that I got
and what do you model, you know, to your kids?
And it is really important to make these intentional efforts
of having neighbors over and other people over right, And
it's easy not to with the busyness of life. But
all these parents out there who are just feeling lonely
and are not modeling it well to their.
Speaker 5 (39:41):
Kids, I mean, you're basically screwing the next generation.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
Unfortunately.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
Right, It's it's and and it's it's really important. And
I feel like that number is higher than that. I
feel like half of half of all Americans is what
I had read, right.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
Maybe the thirty six the ones that admit it.
Speaker 3 (39:59):
Right, Yeah, it's really it's it's a struggle. And you know,
we look to social media for connection.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
In case the place, especially now because AI you may
be finding connection with a bot.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Dangerous.
Speaker 1 (40:17):
Well, there's no bot at the block party exactly. They
put together kind of a cool robot, like a kid.
Speaker 6 (40:26):
Eventually they're going to make our block parties easier.
Speaker 5 (40:28):
The bots can do all the work. We can just
enjoy the block one day.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
Unbelievable. So somebody's listening to me. I hope a whole
bunch of somebody's listen to me right now saying okay,
I'm convinced. Let's do a block party. How do they
find you?
Speaker 2 (40:43):
So if they go to block party USA dot org
is the website?
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Got it? And do you do a zoom with How
does that work?
Speaker 3 (40:53):
So I once want well right now and back to
once a month. And if they go on, if they
sign up to receive my updates, they'll get the time
and date for it, and I just have a zoom
link and they join.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
The costs to any of this, no cost, no you
all this just to be kind and fix our.
Speaker 5 (41:13):
Culture, she said, bloody do gooder.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
You are a bloody do gooder.
Speaker 5 (41:18):
She's willing to share her email address to people want to.
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Get in touch with you. How do they email?
Speaker 2 (41:24):
The best way is info at block PARTYUSA dot org?
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Got it?
Speaker 3 (41:28):
Or I have forms on the website too, like if
they have specific questions, you'll get to them.
Speaker 1 (41:32):
Just go You'll help and they can zoom with you
at some point ye if they would need to.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
There's one thing too, I'm working on how to guide
for organizations, houses of worship, towns and cities. How to
bring this idea to their communities.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
Certainly houses of worship only make sense. That would be easy.
And you said towns and cities, Yeah, they have like
a citywide block party.
Speaker 2 (41:57):
No, to encourage their citizens to dream.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
It's an idea.
Speaker 3 (42:00):
So it's basically to get them to bring the idea.
So like your local chapters, they would bring this idea, right,
and so other organizations can bring this idea today, Alex.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
Seriously, the whole local chapter thing, this needs to be
one of the focus.
Speaker 5 (42:16):
I was actually about to say earlier too.
Speaker 6 (42:19):
Even for you Army members listening who aren't starting chapters
in your community, you can still do the block parties too.
It's actually kind of a cool way of testing it out, like, hey,
let me see about doing some more stuff in my
community and hopefully do more after that.
Speaker 1 (42:30):
Here it is. I'll bet they'll be one of them.
I'll bet they'll be a block party in Atlanta from
a certain subbody after this episode. I'll bet you it
what you got.
Speaker 6 (42:40):
So I thought it was very cool the email he
sent me yesterday, Just the connectivity of the Army. Yeah,
so Vanessa emailed me Hi Alex getting ready to board
my flight and finally had to listen to send you
these photos. As I was listening to past episodes, I
cannot believe it when I saw Tim Brown and then
she sent me a bunch of photos of him and
said I'm on a see had a loss for words,
(43:01):
and then we actually uncovered even something deeper in the
car driving over here talking about it.
Speaker 5 (43:06):
Why did you Why did you share it? Vanessa? Well,
it was just that how did you get to know Tim?
Your expense at Tim? And then where we found out?
Speaker 3 (43:15):
I couldn't it was it was a yeah, it was
a powerful episode and I was just anyway. So my
friend Pete who I mentioned, who was killed on nine
to eleven, I became really close with his mom, Unice Marguerite,
and she had never been to a nine to eleven museum,
even though we live, you know, an hour away, and
so we made a plan three years ago in November
(43:37):
to go and we called there were there are two
other women that were with me.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
Call ourselves Team Marguerite and this guy Mac.
Speaker 3 (43:46):
Who is with the Victim Assistant Witness program and so
he'd be He connected us with Tim Brown, and I
think Unics had already met Tim before were and so
we spent two days at the nine to eleven museum,
the Greek Orthodox Church that had just opened or was
(44:08):
about to open, and also Ahara's. We went and had
lunch there at the at the pub that he mentioned,
and right before you know, my Greet's ninetieth birthday. She
fell dis May and her funeral was May eighth, and
Tim wasn't able to come because he was traveling. And
(44:32):
I looked back through the text in the car ride
and he said he was in Denver and then going
to be in Memphis.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
He was doing our show was.
Speaker 2 (44:41):
On May eighth.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
What a ray small world.
Speaker 5 (44:46):
That crazy, unbelievable and if people haven't.
Speaker 2 (44:52):
Everybody has, Oh two of.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
Both of them, Yeah, they were really My husband and
I listened to both of them in the car right
up to Vermont on Friday, and it was really impactful
on my husband, who is I'm going to connect him
with him, He's going to do some work on this
because it's so important to not only never forget.
Speaker 2 (45:16):
In our homes and in our schools, but also never
forget what cause right the hate of the other.
Speaker 1 (45:23):
That caused this. Maybe we should have a block party, definitely,
Maybe we should have a block party, and we need
to open up some block party Middle East things and
some block party Oversees things, and I mean metaphorically, a
block party can fix all of it.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Be so happy if.
Speaker 1 (45:46):
You well, we'll just see each other's human beings. Yes,
what it's about it is. Thank you so much, Vanessa.
You are awesome. Vanessa Elias, founder of block Party USA
from Wilt, Connecticut, but shedding her light and ideas around
the world in our country. And I hope each of
(46:08):
you listening today will consider looking up black Party USA
and pulling one off in your own community for the
good of yourselves, your family, your neighborhoods, your neighbors, and
our culture. Because if we don't start doing more stuff
like this, I fear of where it leads. There are
always answers, and it starts with an army and normal
(46:31):
folks that are willing to do the simple things. And
this is simple and effective. And I got to do
is get in touch with Vanessa and she'll tell you
how to pull it off. Thanks for being here.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
Thank you so much for having me in for the
work you do.
Speaker 1 (46:45):
It's been awesome. Thanks, and thank you for joining us
this week. If Vanessa Elias has inspired you in general,
or better yet, to take action by hosts a block
party in your neighborhood, organizing a community wide block party movement,
(47:05):
or something else entirely. Please let me know. I'd love
to hear about it. You can write me anytime at
Bill at normalfolks dot us and I will respond. If
you enjoyed this episode.
Speaker 4 (47:18):
Share of friends, share it on social, subscribe to the podcast,
rate it, review it, join the army at normalfolks dot us,
any and all of these things that will help us
grow an army of normal folks.
Speaker 1 (47:31):
I'm Bill Courtney. Until next time, do what you can
Host
Bill Courtney
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Ruthie's Table 4
For more than 30 years The River Cafe in London, has been the home-from-home of artists, architects, designers, actors, collectors, writers, activists, and politicians. Michael Caine, Glenn Close, JJ Abrams, Steve McQueen, Victoria and David Beckham, and Lily Allen, are just some of the people who love to call The River Cafe home. On River Cafe Table 4, Rogers sits down with her customers—who have become friends—to talk about food memories. Table 4 explores how food impacts every aspect of our lives. “Foods is politics, food is cultural, food is how you express love, food is about your heritage, it defines who you and who you want to be,” says Rogers. Each week, Rogers invites her guest to reminisce about family suppers and first dates, what they cook, how they eat when performing, the restaurants they choose, and what food they seek when they need comfort. And to punctuate each episode of Table 4, guests such as Ralph Fiennes, Emily Blunt, and Alfonso Cuarón, read their favourite recipe from one of the best-selling River Cafe cookbooks. Table 4 itself, is situated near The River Cafe’s open kitchen, close to the bright pink wood-fired oven and next to the glossy yellow pass, where Ruthie oversees the restaurant. You are invited to take a seat at this intimate table and join the conversation. For more information, recipes, and ingredients, go to https://shoptherivercafe.co.uk/ Web: https://rivercafe.co.uk/ Instagram: www.instagram.com/therivercafelondon/ Facebook: https://en-gb.facebook.com/therivercafelondon/ For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iheartradio app, apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com