June 18, 2025 • 32 mins
Today on Golden Hour, we're diving into more of your questions, and they're all about in-laws! We kick things off with the question of the day: how did you handle meeting your child's first serious partner? We also dive into parenting your child through heartbreak, dating, and more. Then, we get into our fan questions--our listeners are struggling with their mother & fathers-in-law, from hoarding to meddling in their parenting, we're giving our very best advice. Plus, we end this episode with an in-law themed, "What Would You Do?" Tune in now to hear all this and more and be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks for
joining us. We're so excited to be back. Another week,
another podcast, some more fun. How are you doing today, Susan.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
I'm doing fabulous and beautiful Saint Martin. It's absolutely gorgeous,
as you know.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Yes, as I know, Susan spends most of her time
now in Saint Martin. I never get to see my
friend anymore.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Oh sure, you're a busy your girl anyhow.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
But today we are going to answer more of our
fan questions and make sure everybody you're submitting.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Those because we love these. I mean, we wouldn't be
able to give any advice if they didn't.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Send them in, right, That's exactly right. How do they
do it? Since?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Why do they do it? You remember what to do?
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Just go to Bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour and
keep them coming.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Okay, so send us everything, send us your questions, your updates,
it's all of it. I'm sure now you all know
about Susan and her love of her life Frederick. So
I'm sure you all have questions. We're going to give
you updates. You're going to send us questions. That's the
way it works. You can dm us on Instagram at
Bachelor Happy Hour. We definitely want to hear from you and.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Definitely ask away. I'll tell you anything you want to know.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Okay, So now it's time to get into our episode.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
Let's start Kathy with the question of the day.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Okay, question of the hour, Question of the day. Here
we go. How did you handle meeting your child's first
serious significant other, the person they thought they were going
to marry, the person they did end up marrying, spending
their life with, et cetera. Oh, how'd you do it? Susan? So?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
I thought he was durable and I did.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Is this your daughter's boyfriend?
Speaker 3 (01:51):
My daughter? Okay, her first, real, real, real love affair.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
No. Yeah, And we met his family eventually, like we
were all close. I accepted it like no other. I
just thought everybody in his family was great. However, it
didn't work out after I guess it was about a
year and a half, two years maybe, And that was hard.
That was really hard for me.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Wow. Yeah, that was how old was she?
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Oh? About almost seventeen?
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Wow? So min my daughter she had met a guy.
She was at a private school, played in the soccer academy.
So they had soccer players from other countries, and she
fell in love with a guy from Guatemala. To this day,
I am friends with him. His wife is two kids.
But when they broke up, she started dating another soccer
(02:48):
player and that kind of went on for years. But
the funny thing was when they broke up, she was like, mom,
my heart's broken. You don't understand. We were going to
get married. I was literally choking trying not to laugh.
I mean, I didn't laugh, but she was like, seventeen,
they were gonna get married.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Yeah. I was upset too.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yeah. And then my son, my son, my other son's
not married, but my son that is married as you
married him. The second second go around the first the
first one I was. I remember saying to my husband,
I don't think this is gonna work. And my husband
said to me, keep your mouth shut and welcome her
(03:29):
to the family. Now. Unfortunately he was not alive when
the demise of their marriage came. But believe me, every
day I let a candle and say I told you so, Darryl,
I told you how that's true.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
That's too funny for him to say, Cathy, stay out
of it.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Yeah, yeah, what about your son when he got married.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
So Christopher met jess They knew each other from school.
He had some others, and both of my boys, nobody
was ever f real, had one that I thought would
last forever. And they were bad for each other. They
went through some terrible things. But when Chris came out
of rehab, he was living in Florida for three months
(04:12):
in a special place, so he got his things right. Yeah,
and Jessica is like, I just adore her. It was
the best thing that ever happened. He said, Mom, she's
different than anybody, and that's what you want to hear.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
He's the one, She's the one.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Yeah. And I will say to you when Caitlin marry
Johnny her husband now, she used to say she met
when she was thirty or thirty one, and Kate, my
daughter's beautiful and she's smart. And she kept saying, what's
wrong with me? What's wrong? Why can't I meet a guy? Well,
let me just tell you something she met. You know
how people say, oh, I don't like my in laws,
(04:49):
their son in laws or daughter in laws. I would
walk on hot coals for my son in law and
now for my daughter in law. I just feel so
lucky that they got it right.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
They got it right, just definitely right.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
I love it. Did you ever tell your kids like
you're dating the wrong guy or the wrong woman? Did
you ever tell them?
Speaker 2 (05:13):
I'm not really in so many words, I didn't approve,
But I felt like when you say that, like when
I was a child, when my mother didn't like somebody.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah, right, yeah, yeah, I I I'm trying to think
I never did. No, that's not true. When when Kyle
was dating his first wife, I did. It's funny he
doesn't remember this, but I said to him she'd been
married before and had two kids from a previous marriage,
and I was I remember saying to him, Kyle, marriage
(05:45):
is so tough, marrying someone who has two children and
doesn't get along with the ex husband, Like you're signing
up for a lot, and you know it's it's hard.
But I try to keep my mouth shut on that one.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
But I mean, what can we do?
Speaker 1 (06:00):
You got to let them learn? There isn't it. Would
you say that youth is wasted on the young, like
it takes so long for them to learn the life lessons?
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Yes, and I still learn at sixty plus.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
You know, well when we stop learning, Susan, you know,
what happens we die. No, I'm still learning, she's still learning.
I know. Well, I don't know. It's it's tough those
of you who are dealing with it, and there are
a lot of people dealing with breakups. It's hard. It's
a delicate balance when to open your mouth and say
(06:36):
something and when to just let them suffer. We all
hate to see our kids cry and have that that
first heartbreak. Do you remember your first heartbreak?
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Almost? Definitely?
Speaker 1 (06:46):
Yeah, I do too. I mean it was brutal, Yeah
it was. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
But anybody that is dealing with it.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
I hope you love them, loved that the significant other,
whoever it is that they're child is I hope everything
works out.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yeah, and there's marrying spending their life.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
With right, it doesn't have to be marriage. But you
know that's the other thing. When when if my child
came to me and said, I'm very unhappily married, you
know what do I do? And you know, you know, Kathy,
I'm likely to say, if your miserable kick is asked
to the curb, or kick or asked to the curb, right,
But you know what the problem with that is the
(07:27):
next week they're back together in love and you and
your ass is kicked to the curb.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
So that was always one to call my mom if
we had an argument or something.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
And my friends and they're like, they don't like them anymore.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
You know.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Yeah, things you better left unset.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Yeah, it's true. All right, are you ready to get
into our fan questions? Let's do this, all right, here
we go. I'm going to start off with the first one.
It is a question from Laura. Ladies, I need your help.
(08:02):
My mother in law seriously crossed the line and I'm pissed. Wait, Susan,
I think Laura and I had the same mother in law. Okay,
she's always making Oh it really is my ex my
mother in law. May God rest her soul. Okay, she's
always making snide comments, thinks I'm not good enough for
her son, the usual shit. Recently, she started coming between
(08:25):
my thirteen year old daughter and me. It started with
her interfering in our quarrels, always going to her and
blaming everything on me. My husband has always tried to
get her to chill out, but was ready for a
very serious conversation that he planned to have with her
after she spent the afternoon with our daughter. Well, that
plan changed when my thirteen year old walked in with
(08:48):
are you ready for it? A belly button piercing? My
mother in law got her. I just saw red. I
don't even know what I said to her. I kicked
her out of the house and she is blowing up
my phone. Now my daughter has hell bent on keeping
the piercing and I want it out. How do I
handle this? Can I legally keep her away from my daughter? Please? Help?
(09:11):
And thanks, ladies.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
Oh so much to unpack in this one, because the
kid is obviously going to be mad at her, her mother,
her mother because she wanted it and grandmom did it.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Wait a second, wait what? First of all, I'm sorry, Laura,
your mother in law had no right. That is crossing
the line. She had no right to do it. But
let me just give you a little other tidbit of
Kathy advice here. Unless your daughter has a trust fund
and is supporting you and her father, you are in
(09:45):
control of this household. You can tell her you have
about two minutes to take that belly button piercing out.
And when you grow up and you're paying your own bills,
you can have a belly button piercing. But right now,
you live under my roof, and I paid for your groceries,
and you're cheerleading and your prom dresses. Get it out,
(10:06):
And that's honestly what I would do.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Unfortunately, I don't know if she can legally keep her
away from her daughter.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
No, no, no, what do you think about taking the
belly button?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Because she did it against without my approval and she's
only thirteen. I probably would agree at sixteen, I did mine.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Well, Susan, you've broken every rule in the book, and
anyone who knows you, who knows you break rules and
ask for forgiveness.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Well, my boys wanted to get a tattoo. I said, yeah,
the weight you have the weight? Dick even say till
they're eighteen, and I said, sixteen. It's something that they
really wanted. They sat me down.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
But this sounds like she never asked her mother.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
She anything, no, And that's and Laura, you're absolutely right
your mother in law. I mean, I used my mother
in law was a piece of work, But I mean
the farthest she would go was letting them watch tea
V shows that I wouldn't let him watch, or giving
them cookies ten minutes before they sat down for dinner.
I mean I would have exploded. I would have exploded,
(11:08):
and I would I'm not kidding you. If that were me, Laura,
I'd sit your daughter down and say I'm giving you
thirty seconds to get that piercing out, and if.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
Not, also tell her that I'm going to restrict you
of not even seeing your grandmother.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
If you keep this up.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
By the way, you have to get my permission.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, but first, you know what you geese Susan. The
one little detail here we haven't spoken about. What is
it Daddykin's mama in law's son. So, Laura, you got
to get your husband on board.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
And I was like, he was ready. Remember she said
he's ready to have to sit down with her. Yeah,
well ready in doing it yesterday.
Speaker 1 (11:47):
Yeah. So Laura, get with your husband, tackle your daughter,
rip up the belly ring. Then give your husband, oh,
I don't know, twenty minutes to get on the phone
and have a conversation with his mother.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I mean, what could they possibly said, Oh, well, we
did it.
Speaker 3 (12:02):
Oh well, I mean.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
Oh, I'm guessing this woman would probably say something like
your wife is you know, ridiculous? She don't you know,
who cares?
Speaker 3 (12:10):
I don't care, Laura I feel bad for you. I
really do that.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Laura.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
You call me.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
You call me and give me that mother in law's number.
I will take care of this for you. I promise
it is. You're you're well within your limits. You're well
within Just remember your your daughter's parent. You're not her friend.
You're you know, the mother in law overstep. Your mother
in law overstepped big time. But I think you got
to get your husband on board.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
And also she didn't tell us whether the daughter asked
if she.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Could, It doesn't matter.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
If this done, who cares.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
I mean, sometimes grandmoms can do that. But as long
as there was a conversation, she had no idea this
was happening.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Oh, I thought I sudn't agree with her more Yeah,
I thought you said, we don't know if the grandmother
asked Laura.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
No, not the grandmother. The daughter asked her mother, had
she been talking about it? And the mom said no,
and then grandmother took it.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Yeah, but to me, it doesn't matter. Stick to the facts, ma'am.
The facts are the mother in law took her overstepped.
Get it right. And Laura, I'm going to tell you
something that I learned the hard way. If you try
to soft soap it and don't really no if you do.
If you sidestep and say please, don't ever do that again,
(13:24):
you're just inviting more trouble you and your husband. Let
me repeat, Laura, you and your husband need to lay
down the law. And if you need a third party,
impartial person, invite me. If you need Susan to come
with a baseball bat, invite her. We will be so
happy to help you out with this.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
I really feel for you. I would be limited right now.
I really would.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
Okay, Susan truth time, would you make the daughter take
it out at thirteen?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Probably because I'd be so pissed because there was no
conversation with me.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Yes, if she were, But so you do it by age. See,
I wouldn't care if she's living in my house and
I'm paying her bills. You don't get to do that
stuff without having met having a conversation with your mother.
And if I say no, When you turn eighteen and
you think you're so big and smart you can support
about it, go move out and get any piercings you want,
(14:17):
just to make sure you can pay your rent.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Well, would you ever agree to one if you talk
to her about it at at older age. You just
don't like belly button piercing.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
No, no, no. If she were eighteen, I would say eighteen.
At eighteen, you're an adult. At eighteen you can do
what you want to do. Kyle. I don't know how
old my son was when he got his first tattoo.
And Caitlyn has a couple of sheep I think she
got her first one at eighteen. At that point they
were adults. They I didn't pay for it. I didn't
you know, they didn't ask my permission, and they were
(14:49):
not about sixteen.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
I let them do some things at sixteen. But thank
you for your question, and gosh, I wish you luck.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
I mean, let us.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Let me know, Laura, I think everyone can tell my
mother in law and I and my father in law.
As I said earlier, my mother and father in law
are are deceased. Make you know, God rest their souls.
But we had a difficult relationship my entire forty six
years in my marriage. So get it under control now, Laura.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
The next one, Kathy is from anonymous. Okay, ladies, I
really need your help. My soon to be father in
law made a move on me the other night. Oh God,
And I don't.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Know what to do.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
He's always been very friendly and compliments me a lot,
but it never felt strange until now. Obviously, basically, he
was helping me cut and serve his wife's birthday cake
while she and my fiance were having a sweet chat together.
My father in law drunkenly touched my hand and asked
(15:56):
if I.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Wanted to get out of here? What the hell?
Speaker 2 (16:00):
I just laughed at all uncomfortably and ran outside with
cake slices.
Speaker 3 (16:05):
He then followed it up with no, one has to know.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
I haven't spoke to him since, and I haven't told
my fiance yet. He's a surgeon and has been crazy
busy since. What the hell do I do? How do
I navigate this? I know, of course I have to
tell him, But how when all these question marks.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
As girl friends? I mean one thing I took Kathy first.
He was drinking. He was drunk.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
It is never an excuse, do not.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
It makes people act way out of character.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
If I disagree, I think when people are drunk that's
when their real character comes out.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
Well sometimes yes, but wow, and.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
Who is she going to tell the fiance.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Had his father?
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yeah? Oh, are you saying you wouldn't do that. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
It would depend on if it's the only time it
ever happened and it doesn't happen again.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
But I okay, that's going to start okay, and I
are not are not finished.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
I would have a conversation with that man and warn him,
don't you dare. Hopefully he'll be begging for mercy and
apologize I don't even know why I said it, and
give him the benefit of the doubt. If not, and
you open up this can of worms, the whole family's
going to get involved. It's going to be drama. I
(17:43):
don't blame you for running away from the asshole. And
he is an asshole for doing it for his wife's
birthday party. You want to get out of here, I mean,
come hold.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Well, one thing you're not picking up on is her
fiance is a surgeon. We're not talking about two twenty
two or twenty two year olds here. They're in the thirties.
I guarantee you if he's a surgeon, he's he's done
his residency, he's done a fellowship. He's thirty. It means
he's old enough to handle the truth and deal with
(18:13):
his father and say, if you ever I would. I
would run to my fiance.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
You wouldn't tell the have a conversation with the man
himself first.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
You would right to your field.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Absolutely, I would go right to my fiance and say,
deal with this, because this can never happen again. I
would never die.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
I would say that to the father.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
No, I will see to me, Susan that I mean,
I see what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You're wrong people, everyone, I'm wrong. Yeah, you don't know
at all, No way.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
You're entitled to one mistake, and this was a big mistake.
And I'm going to give him the benefit of that
and say, listen, don't ever ever. Hopefully he'll be mortified
and said, I can't believe I did that. It depends
and what ally answers. And if he didn't answer properly,
then of course you don't tell.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
You so let me. I mean, I I just play
the what if game? Right? What if she doesn't tell
her fiance, they get married, and the guy attacks her
and then she goes through now whatever grabs her in
the throes to whatever. For God's sake, Well, Susan, I
have a news slash for you. He did not want
(19:27):
to take her hand to go out and buy her
cotton candy.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Let's he was pretty obviously what he was saying. Okay,
so I'm saying drunk. Yeah, Well, being drunk is no
excuse for bad behavior ever.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Ever. So and I told my kids that from the
time they were had their first glass of beer, don't ever.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Tell them anything you want when you're drunk. It's a
whole different.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
And that's why when you're drunk, if you get caught
for a d UI, you you did it. You knew
what the consequences were. This idiot got this.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
This is flirting from future father in law. That's disgusting.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Yeah, and I'm going about fiance and I'm going to say,
you tell your father if he ever does that again,
he's not gonna like what happens to him.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
Okay, all right, babe. So I know you're anonymous. I
know you're listening to this.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
Let me know how you because we want to know it.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
And by the way, Anonymous, you say, I know, of
course I have to tell him, but how and when
I think she is referring to her fiance, So Anonymous,
I'm on the same page with you. You do need
to tell him when, the sooner the better. By the way,
and you know what, you don't have to go crying
and say I can't just say I need to talk
(20:45):
to you calmly and patiently. I need to talk to
you about something that happened. I want you to I'm
telling you because it can never happen again. And I
want you to take your dad quietly aside and explain
this detail to him so that I am never put
in this position again. And then I give my fiance
a big kiss, love on him and say I'm so lucky.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
To have that fiance is not ready for a big kiss.
After he hears this, it's starting something. He's going to
be pissed off as his spot.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
You want a strong marriage or a marriage built on secrets.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
No, that's not kat, I think it's I think the
man fucked up because he was drunk.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
I really do.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
So you are you are making an excuse because he
was drunk. I don't make excuses.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
I'm giving them one one out.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Nope, okay yet again, Susan and I are on different
uh sides of the table there, and you know what
guy's way in. Let us know, let us know what
you think. I think there'll be people on both sides
of the table, and frankly, there isn't a wrong or
right answer. It's just what you would be comfortable doing. Yes, Okay,
now that's wrong. Now that let it be that we
(22:00):
always think she's no. I don't no, I do not.
We're moving just on question two from anonymous. Now we're
moving to question three from anonymous. Okay, Hi, Kathy and Susan,
I need some advice on how to handle this situation
(22:23):
with my mother in law. Ever since we had our
two kids, my in laws have always either come to
our house or met us in a different location, like
for family vacation, et cetera. Recently, we were in their
neighborhood and decided to pop over to surprise them. To
our hearror, we realized that my mother in law is
(22:45):
a total horner and my father in law has just
grown complacent. She's really emotionally attached to all of her things,
and we'll have a panic attack if we even suggest storage,
let alone trash. How do we help her through this?
Really simple?
Speaker 3 (23:01):
You don't professional help.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
That's a disease like that's big and some people I
don't think they can do it.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Honestly, I mean I would just not go to their house.
It's pretty simple, Anonymous. You can't make her do anything
she doesn't want to do.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
So she always met them at a different plays like
family vacation, and there's a reason why she realizes she
has a problem.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
And keep inviting her to your house.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Don't go. Yeah, it's anonymous, it's not your problem to solve.
Invite her on the vacations, meet her at a restaurant,
meet her at a park, meet your father in law,
you know, meet them at public places, take them on vacation.
But you know what, it's clearly upsetting to you, Anonymous,
that you're seeing this, you know, hoarding situation. So don't
(23:54):
put yourself in the situation.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
Is it that simple, Yeah, it is that simple. That's
an easy one.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Okay, you can all right, all right now, Oh boy, Susan.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
What would you do?
Speaker 1 (24:07):
What would you do? This is Mother in Law Audition.
I'm just can I just tell you this whole episode
is triggering me because my in laws could not stand me.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
It was awful.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
All Right, we're gonna play for a game segment. It's
going to be it's mother in Law Audition. We're going
to switch off reading hypotheticals and we're gonna give her. Yeah,
what would you do as to what we'd do as
the in laws in the situation? Okay, so I'm going
to start us off. So it's as if we're the
(24:39):
in laws. Okay, all right, your daughter in law cooks
dinner for the whole family, but it's barely edible. Do
you pretend to love it? Quietly order takeout? Offer a
cooking class for her birthday?
Speaker 3 (24:54):
What would you do, Susan, Well, obviously you can't order
take out.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
I would tried to help her learn how to cook,
not for her birthday, but I would take her a side.
I mean, obviously, if you fairly edible, some everybody there
is going to be obvious. But I would never embarrass her.
I would eat as much as I could.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Right, I would. I would not pretend to love it.
I would eat some of it, and then I would
do what you said. I would take her aside and say, sweetie,
I know you tried so hard on this meal, but
you know what, maybe it's just let's look at the positive.
Maybe it's just one bad meal. I cooked a meal once.
(25:40):
Let me just tell you, for friends, this is this
is when my husband, actually my husband cooked this meal
I'm wrong. We invited friends over and she was a
gourmet cook, unbelievable cook, and I was very nervous about
having them over. Well, Daryl decided to grill chicken on
our new barbecue. Well, and I tell you cooked. He
(26:01):
crucified this chicken. It was down to black. You know
that's right. It was worse than that burger Susan. You hit.
It went right to the bone, like the meat just
was gone. It was charred skin right to the But
so I was profusely apologizing. I was like, so embarrassed.
(26:23):
Do you know what she said? That's what made me
think about when I read this question. Our friend said,
this is delicious. I love barbecued chicken. Thank you so
much for having us. We just love your company. She
that was a on the way home probably, But the
point is we had fun. She didn't embarrass me. I was.
(26:44):
I was mortified, But yeah, I don't. I don't think
you pretend to love it. But I think you just eat.
And it might been my fat name. It might have
just been one meal at my barbecued chicken. Maybe it
wasn't you know.
Speaker 3 (26:57):
Maybe she's all right.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
Your son and daughter and law announce they are moving
to another country. Do you plan monthly visits, immediately guilt
trip them into staying, or act supportive while secretly sobbing
in your wine.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
I'd be planning my trips.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
I was just gonna say. I would be planning my trips.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
I'd be happy and excited for their experience that they're
going to have.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Yes, absolutely, and we agree, Kathy, I love it. Okay,
go do read the next one.
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
You catch your future daughter in law sneaking a cigarette
behind the house before family dinner and she thinks no
one saw. You know, this is something that really bothers
your son and has been discussed about it many times,
especially now that they're trying to get pregnant. Oh god,
do you pretend you didn't see it? Casually drop off
(28:00):
a pamphlet about lung hell or sneak her a lighter
for smity?
Speaker 1 (28:06):
What what.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
I picked? None of those?
Speaker 2 (28:13):
I would pick E and I whisper in her ear,
hell nhealthy it is?
Speaker 3 (28:17):
And something like that.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
I would not do any of that. I would walk
up to her quietly, and maybe not even that night,
but I would at some point quietly talk to her
and say.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
To her, but she they're asking about when we go
to the sun.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
And I'm saying I would not go to him. I
would quietly at some other time, not right then and there.
Call call her up. Let's call her Susan. Susan. I saw,
of course we do. I saw you smoking, and you
know that is between you and my son. However, I
(28:59):
think think it is not only are you trying to
get pregnant, but you're starting your marriage or relationship. It's
a lie. So you might want to think about that
because I think if you could get her to look
at it in a different light, that it's it's creating
a lie. It's a lie between them, never mind the
health of the baby and all that stuff. That's that's
what I think.
Speaker 3 (29:20):
Yeah, all right, you got the next one.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
Okay, here's the next one. Your son and a soon
to be wife insist on getting you addressed for their
wedding to make it special. When you get it, it's
absolutely hideous and does not work for you at all.
Do you wear it proudly? Try to talk to them
about it, or not say anything and just wear something else.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
That's easy.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
If they're insisting, I'm going to insist that they don't
do it without me.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
Because I'm a picky one.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
I was just going to say, yeah, I can't imagine
my son first of all, shopping, let's start.
Speaker 3 (29:57):
Does that does?
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Actually I had a friend who just was telling me
that they did buy a gay couple that just got married,
and they did pick out the outfit for But that's
a little different, you know. I mean, whatever I would,
I would, I would have to talk to them about
it and say, no, I have to try it on.
I have to like it.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
All right.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
You find out your daughter in law hates your famous
holiday cookies, do you switch recipes just for her, make
an extra and joke about it, tell her lovingly that
she's wrong.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Oh I'm interested in your answer because I know exactly
what I would do. What would you do, Susan?
Speaker 3 (30:37):
Oh, honey, you don't like this. That's a shame we
all do.
Speaker 1 (30:41):
See. I wouldn't. I would. I would make a joke
about it and say, you know, I uh, you know,
Susie Q over here didn't like my snicker doodles, so
I made so I made him. I know everyone else does, so.
Speaker 3 (30:54):
Susan, har try a different one.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah, yeah, I would make it. I would do it,
all right, Your son and daughter in law adopt a
giant dog that sheds everywhere. Well, can I just tell
you I'm never going to visit and invite you to
stay at their fur filled house. Do you pack a
lint roller and suck it up, make an excuse him
a hotel nearby, or confront them on the issue. Oh,
(31:17):
I know exactly what I would do.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
I mean, it's their dog, and if I'm going to visit,
I'm going to pack it.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
You know what. You know what I do because my
daughter has and her husband have a boxer, and I
love that dog, but oh my god, it's hair everywhere.
When I've stayed at their house, all I do is
close the bedroom door so that dog cannot get in
and get on my clothes. Vacuuming, Yes, Susan would be
sweeping it. She'd be She'd never mind, You'd be vacuuming
(31:45):
the dog. Oh god, all right, that was so much fun.
Thank you to all of our listeners. I've been traumatized
by all of this talk of mother in laws and
father in laws to all hair and dog hair, To
all all of you who are even contemplating getting married.
You will have a mother in law, You will have
(32:06):
a father in law. Remember, you're not just marrying the guy,
you're marrying the family. You're not just marrying the woman.
You're marrying the family.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
Get it right right Sometimes you can't help it though,
they call me back. But thank you everybody for joining us,
and be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we
have new episodes coming out every week, and I know
you don't want to miss anything.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
No, I mean, why would they want to miss it?
Next week we're going to talk about son and daughter
in laws, just see if we can traumatize everyone further.
But in the meantime, submit your questions to us. You
go to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or dm
us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour. We really do
want to hear from you.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iheartradiop
or wherever you listen to your podcast.
Speaker 3 (32:52):
Thank you have a great week.
Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks for
joining us. We're so excited to be back. Another week,
another podcast, some more fun. How are you doing today, Susan.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
I'm doing fabulous and beautiful Saint Martin. It's absolutely gorgeous,
as you know.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Yes, as I know, Susan spends most of her time
now in Saint Martin. I never get to see my
friend anymore.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Oh sure, you're a busy your girl anyhow.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
But today we are going to answer more of our
fan questions and make sure everybody you're submitting.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Those because we love these. I mean, we wouldn't be
able to give any advice if they didn't.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Send them in, right, That's exactly right. How do they
do it? Since?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Why do they do it? You remember what to do?
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Just go to Bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour and
keep them coming.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Okay, so send us everything, send us your questions, your updates,
it's all of it. I'm sure now you all know
about Susan and her love of her life Frederick. So
I'm sure you all have questions. We're going to give
you updates. You're going to send us questions. That's the
way it works. You can dm us on Instagram at
Bachelor Happy Hour. We definitely want to hear from you and.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Definitely ask away. I'll tell you anything you want to know.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Okay, So now it's time to get into our episode.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
Let's start Kathy with the question of the day.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Okay, question of the hour, Question of the day. Here
we go. How did you handle meeting your child's first
serious significant other, the person they thought they were going
to marry, the person they did end up marrying, spending
their life with, et cetera. Oh, how'd you do it? Susan? So?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
I thought he was durable and I did.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Is this your daughter's boyfriend?
Speaker 3 (01:51):
My daughter? Okay, her first, real, real, real love affair.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
No. Yeah, And we met his family eventually, like we
were all close. I accepted it like no other. I
just thought everybody in his family was great. However, it
didn't work out after I guess it was about a
year and a half, two years maybe, And that was hard.
That was really hard for me.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Wow. Yeah, that was how old was she?
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Oh? About almost seventeen?
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Wow? So min my daughter she had met a guy.
She was at a private school, played in the soccer academy.
So they had soccer players from other countries, and she
fell in love with a guy from Guatemala. To this day,
I am friends with him. His wife is two kids.
But when they broke up, she started dating another soccer
(02:48):
player and that kind of went on for years. But
the funny thing was when they broke up, she was like, mom,
my heart's broken. You don't understand. We were going to
get married. I was literally choking trying not to laugh.
I mean, I didn't laugh, but she was like, seventeen,
they were gonna get married.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Yeah. I was upset too.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yeah. And then my son, my son, my other son's
not married, but my son that is married as you
married him. The second second go around the first the
first one I was. I remember saying to my husband,
I don't think this is gonna work. And my husband
said to me, keep your mouth shut and welcome her
(03:29):
to the family. Now. Unfortunately he was not alive when
the demise of their marriage came. But believe me, every
day I let a candle and say I told you so, Darryl,
I told you how that's true.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
That's too funny for him to say, Cathy, stay out
of it.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Yeah, yeah, what about your son when he got married.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
So Christopher met jess They knew each other from school.
He had some others, and both of my boys, nobody
was ever f real, had one that I thought would
last forever. And they were bad for each other. They
went through some terrible things. But when Chris came out
of rehab, he was living in Florida for three months
(04:12):
in a special place, so he got his things right. Yeah,
and Jessica is like, I just adore her. It was
the best thing that ever happened. He said, Mom, she's
different than anybody, and that's what you want to hear.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
He's the one, She's the one.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Yeah. And I will say to you when Caitlin marry
Johnny her husband now, she used to say she met
when she was thirty or thirty one, and Kate, my
daughter's beautiful and she's smart. And she kept saying, what's
wrong with me? What's wrong? Why can't I meet a guy? Well,
let me just tell you something she met. You know
how people say, oh, I don't like my in laws,
(04:49):
their son in laws or daughter in laws. I would
walk on hot coals for my son in law and
now for my daughter in law. I just feel so
lucky that they got it right.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
They got it right, just definitely right.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
I love it. Did you ever tell your kids like
you're dating the wrong guy or the wrong woman? Did
you ever tell them?
Speaker 2 (05:13):
I'm not really in so many words, I didn't approve,
But I felt like when you say that, like when
I was a child, when my mother didn't like somebody.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah, right, yeah, yeah, I I I'm trying to think
I never did. No, that's not true. When when Kyle
was dating his first wife, I did. It's funny he
doesn't remember this, but I said to him she'd been
married before and had two kids from a previous marriage,
and I was I remember saying to him, Kyle, marriage
(05:45):
is so tough, marrying someone who has two children and
doesn't get along with the ex husband, Like you're signing
up for a lot, and you know it's it's hard.
But I try to keep my mouth shut on that one.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
But I mean, what can we do?
Speaker 1 (06:00):
You got to let them learn? There isn't it. Would
you say that youth is wasted on the young, like
it takes so long for them to learn the life lessons?
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Yes, and I still learn at sixty plus.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
You know, well when we stop learning, Susan, you know,
what happens we die. No, I'm still learning, she's still learning.
I know. Well, I don't know. It's it's tough those
of you who are dealing with it, and there are
a lot of people dealing with breakups. It's hard. It's
a delicate balance when to open your mouth and say
(06:36):
something and when to just let them suffer. We all
hate to see our kids cry and have that that
first heartbreak. Do you remember your first heartbreak?
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Almost? Definitely?
Speaker 1 (06:46):
Yeah, I do too. I mean it was brutal, Yeah
it was. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
But anybody that is dealing with it.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
I hope you love them, loved that the significant other,
whoever it is that they're child is I hope everything
works out.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yeah, and there's marrying spending their life.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
With right, it doesn't have to be marriage. But you
know that's the other thing. When when if my child
came to me and said, I'm very unhappily married, you
know what do I do? And you know, you know, Kathy,
I'm likely to say, if your miserable kick is asked
to the curb, or kick or asked to the curb, right,
But you know what the problem with that is the
(07:27):
next week they're back together in love and you and
your ass is kicked to the curb.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
So that was always one to call my mom if
we had an argument or something.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
And my friends and they're like, they don't like them anymore.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
You know.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Yeah, things you better left unset.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Yeah, it's true. All right, are you ready to get
into our fan questions? Let's do this, all right, here
we go. I'm going to start off with the first one.
It is a question from Laura. Ladies, I need your help.
(08:02):
My mother in law seriously crossed the line and I'm pissed. Wait, Susan,
I think Laura and I had the same mother in law. Okay,
she's always making Oh it really is my ex my
mother in law. May God rest her soul. Okay, she's
always making snide comments, thinks I'm not good enough for
her son, the usual shit. Recently, she started coming between
(08:25):
my thirteen year old daughter and me. It started with
her interfering in our quarrels, always going to her and
blaming everything on me. My husband has always tried to
get her to chill out, but was ready for a
very serious conversation that he planned to have with her
after she spent the afternoon with our daughter. Well, that
plan changed when my thirteen year old walked in with
(08:48):
are you ready for it? A belly button piercing? My
mother in law got her. I just saw red. I
don't even know what I said to her. I kicked
her out of the house and she is blowing up
my phone. Now my daughter has hell bent on keeping
the piercing and I want it out. How do I
handle this? Can I legally keep her away from my daughter? Please? Help?
(09:11):
And thanks, ladies.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
Oh so much to unpack in this one, because the
kid is obviously going to be mad at her, her mother,
her mother because she wanted it and grandmom did it.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Wait a second, wait what? First of all, I'm sorry, Laura,
your mother in law had no right. That is crossing
the line. She had no right to do it. But
let me just give you a little other tidbit of
Kathy advice here. Unless your daughter has a trust fund
and is supporting you and her father, you are in
(09:45):
control of this household. You can tell her you have
about two minutes to take that belly button piercing out.
And when you grow up and you're paying your own bills,
you can have a belly button piercing. But right now,
you live under my roof, and I paid for your groceries,
and you're cheerleading and your prom dresses. Get it out,
(10:06):
And that's honestly what I would do.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Unfortunately, I don't know if she can legally keep her
away from her daughter.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
No, no, no, what do you think about taking the
belly button?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Because she did it against without my approval and she's
only thirteen. I probably would agree at sixteen, I did mine.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Well, Susan, you've broken every rule in the book, and
anyone who knows you, who knows you break rules and
ask for forgiveness.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Well, my boys wanted to get a tattoo. I said, yeah,
the weight you have the weight? Dick even say till
they're eighteen, and I said, sixteen. It's something that they
really wanted. They sat me down.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
But this sounds like she never asked her mother.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
She anything, no, And that's and Laura, you're absolutely right
your mother in law. I mean, I used my mother
in law was a piece of work, But I mean
the farthest she would go was letting them watch tea
V shows that I wouldn't let him watch, or giving
them cookies ten minutes before they sat down for dinner.
I mean I would have exploded. I would have exploded,
(11:08):
and I would I'm not kidding you. If that were me, Laura,
I'd sit your daughter down and say I'm giving you
thirty seconds to get that piercing out, and if.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
Not, also tell her that I'm going to restrict you
of not even seeing your grandmother.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
If you keep this up.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
By the way, you have to get my permission.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, but first, you know what you geese Susan. The
one little detail here we haven't spoken about. What is
it Daddykin's mama in law's son. So, Laura, you got
to get your husband on board.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
And I was like, he was ready. Remember she said
he's ready to have to sit down with her. Yeah,
well ready in doing it yesterday.
Speaker 1 (11:47):
Yeah. So Laura, get with your husband, tackle your daughter,
rip up the belly ring. Then give your husband, oh,
I don't know, twenty minutes to get on the phone
and have a conversation with his mother.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I mean, what could they possibly said, Oh, well, we
did it.
Speaker 3 (12:02):
Oh well, I mean.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
Oh, I'm guessing this woman would probably say something like
your wife is you know, ridiculous? She don't you know,
who cares?
Speaker 3 (12:10):
I don't care, Laura I feel bad for you. I
really do that.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Laura.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
You call me.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
You call me and give me that mother in law's number.
I will take care of this for you. I promise
it is. You're you're well within your limits. You're well
within Just remember your your daughter's parent. You're not her friend.
You're you know, the mother in law overstep. Your mother
in law overstepped big time. But I think you got
to get your husband on board.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
And also she didn't tell us whether the daughter asked
if she.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Could, It doesn't matter.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
If this done, who cares.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
I mean, sometimes grandmoms can do that. But as long
as there was a conversation, she had no idea this
was happening.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Oh, I thought I sudn't agree with her more Yeah,
I thought you said, we don't know if the grandmother
asked Laura.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
No, not the grandmother. The daughter asked her mother, had
she been talking about it? And the mom said no,
and then grandmother took it.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Yeah, but to me, it doesn't matter. Stick to the facts, ma'am.
The facts are the mother in law took her overstepped.
Get it right. And Laura, I'm going to tell you
something that I learned the hard way. If you try
to soft soap it and don't really no if you do.
If you sidestep and say please, don't ever do that again,
(13:24):
you're just inviting more trouble you and your husband. Let
me repeat, Laura, you and your husband need to lay
down the law. And if you need a third party,
impartial person, invite me. If you need Susan to come
with a baseball bat, invite her. We will be so
happy to help you out with this.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
I really feel for you. I would be limited right now.
I really would.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
Okay, Susan truth time, would you make the daughter take
it out at thirteen?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Probably because I'd be so pissed because there was no
conversation with me.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Yes, if she were, But so you do it by age. See,
I wouldn't care if she's living in my house and
I'm paying her bills. You don't get to do that
stuff without having met having a conversation with your mother.
And if I say no, When you turn eighteen and
you think you're so big and smart you can support
about it, go move out and get any piercings you want,
(14:17):
just to make sure you can pay your rent.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Well, would you ever agree to one if you talk
to her about it at at older age. You just
don't like belly button piercing.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
No, no, no. If she were eighteen, I would say eighteen.
At eighteen, you're an adult. At eighteen you can do
what you want to do. Kyle. I don't know how
old my son was when he got his first tattoo.
And Caitlyn has a couple of sheep I think she
got her first one at eighteen. At that point they
were adults. They I didn't pay for it. I didn't
you know, they didn't ask my permission, and they were
(14:49):
not about sixteen.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
I let them do some things at sixteen. But thank
you for your question, and gosh, I wish you luck.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
I mean, let us.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Let me know, Laura, I think everyone can tell my
mother in law and I and my father in law.
As I said earlier, my mother and father in law
are are deceased. Make you know, God rest their souls.
But we had a difficult relationship my entire forty six
years in my marriage. So get it under control now, Laura.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
The next one, Kathy is from anonymous. Okay, ladies, I
really need your help. My soon to be father in
law made a move on me the other night. Oh God,
And I don't.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Know what to do.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
He's always been very friendly and compliments me a lot,
but it never felt strange until now. Obviously, basically, he
was helping me cut and serve his wife's birthday cake
while she and my fiance were having a sweet chat together.
My father in law drunkenly touched my hand and asked
(15:56):
if I.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Wanted to get out of here? What the hell?
Speaker 2 (16:00):
I just laughed at all uncomfortably and ran outside with
cake slices.
Speaker 3 (16:05):
He then followed it up with no, one has to know.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
I haven't spoke to him since, and I haven't told
my fiance yet. He's a surgeon and has been crazy
busy since. What the hell do I do? How do
I navigate this? I know, of course I have to
tell him, But how when all these question marks.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
As girl friends? I mean one thing I took Kathy first.
He was drinking. He was drunk.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
It is never an excuse, do not.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
It makes people act way out of character.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
If I disagree, I think when people are drunk that's
when their real character comes out.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
Well sometimes yes, but wow, and.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
Who is she going to tell the fiance.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Had his father?
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yeah? Oh, are you saying you wouldn't do that. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
It would depend on if it's the only time it
ever happened and it doesn't happen again.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
But I okay, that's going to start okay, and I
are not are not finished.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
I would have a conversation with that man and warn him,
don't you dare. Hopefully he'll be begging for mercy and
apologize I don't even know why I said it, and
give him the benefit of the doubt. If not, and
you open up this can of worms, the whole family's
going to get involved. It's going to be drama. I
(17:43):
don't blame you for running away from the asshole. And
he is an asshole for doing it for his wife's
birthday party. You want to get out of here, I mean,
come hold.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Well, one thing you're not picking up on is her
fiance is a surgeon. We're not talking about two twenty
two or twenty two year olds here. They're in the thirties.
I guarantee you if he's a surgeon, he's he's done
his residency, he's done a fellowship. He's thirty. It means
he's old enough to handle the truth and deal with
(18:13):
his father and say, if you ever I would. I
would run to my fiance.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
You wouldn't tell the have a conversation with the man
himself first.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
You would right to your field.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Absolutely, I would go right to my fiance and say,
deal with this, because this can never happen again. I
would never die.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
I would say that to the father.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
No, I will see to me, Susan that I mean,
I see what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You're wrong people, everyone, I'm wrong. Yeah, you don't know
at all, No way.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
You're entitled to one mistake, and this was a big mistake.
And I'm going to give him the benefit of that
and say, listen, don't ever ever. Hopefully he'll be mortified
and said, I can't believe I did that. It depends
and what ally answers. And if he didn't answer properly,
then of course you don't tell.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
You so let me. I mean, I I just play
the what if game? Right? What if she doesn't tell
her fiance, they get married, and the guy attacks her
and then she goes through now whatever grabs her in
the throes to whatever. For God's sake, Well, Susan, I
have a news slash for you. He did not want
(19:27):
to take her hand to go out and buy her
cotton candy.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Let's he was pretty obviously what he was saying. Okay,
so I'm saying drunk. Yeah, Well, being drunk is no
excuse for bad behavior ever.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Ever. So and I told my kids that from the
time they were had their first glass of beer, don't ever.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Tell them anything you want when you're drunk. It's a
whole different.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
And that's why when you're drunk, if you get caught
for a d UI, you you did it. You knew
what the consequences were. This idiot got this.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
This is flirting from future father in law. That's disgusting.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Yeah, and I'm going about fiance and I'm going to say,
you tell your father if he ever does that again,
he's not gonna like what happens to him.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
Okay, all right, babe. So I know you're anonymous. I
know you're listening to this.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
Let me know how you because we want to know it.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
And by the way, Anonymous, you say, I know, of
course I have to tell him, but how and when
I think she is referring to her fiance, So Anonymous,
I'm on the same page with you. You do need
to tell him when, the sooner the better. By the way,
and you know what, you don't have to go crying
and say I can't just say I need to talk
(20:45):
to you calmly and patiently. I need to talk to
you about something that happened. I want you to I'm
telling you because it can never happen again. And I
want you to take your dad quietly aside and explain
this detail to him so that I am never put
in this position again. And then I give my fiance
a big kiss, love on him and say I'm so lucky.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
To have that fiance is not ready for a big kiss.
After he hears this, it's starting something. He's going to
be pissed off as his spot.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
You want a strong marriage or a marriage built on secrets.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
No, that's not kat, I think it's I think the
man fucked up because he was drunk.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
I really do.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
So you are you are making an excuse because he
was drunk. I don't make excuses.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
I'm giving them one one out.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Nope, okay yet again, Susan and I are on different
uh sides of the table there, and you know what
guy's way in. Let us know, let us know what
you think. I think there'll be people on both sides
of the table, and frankly, there isn't a wrong or
right answer. It's just what you would be comfortable doing. Yes, Okay,
now that's wrong. Now that let it be that we
(22:00):
always think she's no. I don't no, I do not.
We're moving just on question two from anonymous. Now we're
moving to question three from anonymous. Okay, Hi, Kathy and Susan,
I need some advice on how to handle this situation
(22:23):
with my mother in law. Ever since we had our
two kids, my in laws have always either come to
our house or met us in a different location, like
for family vacation, et cetera. Recently, we were in their
neighborhood and decided to pop over to surprise them. To
our hearror, we realized that my mother in law is
(22:45):
a total horner and my father in law has just
grown complacent. She's really emotionally attached to all of her things,
and we'll have a panic attack if we even suggest storage,
let alone trash. How do we help her through this?
Really simple?
Speaker 3 (23:01):
You don't professional help.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
That's a disease like that's big and some people I
don't think they can do it.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Honestly, I mean I would just not go to their house.
It's pretty simple, Anonymous. You can't make her do anything
she doesn't want to do.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
So she always met them at a different plays like
family vacation, and there's a reason why she realizes she
has a problem.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
And keep inviting her to your house.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Don't go. Yeah, it's anonymous, it's not your problem to solve.
Invite her on the vacations, meet her at a restaurant,
meet her at a park, meet your father in law,
you know, meet them at public places, take them on vacation.
But you know what, it's clearly upsetting to you, Anonymous,
that you're seeing this, you know, hoarding situation. So don't
(23:54):
put yourself in the situation.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
Is it that simple, Yeah, it is that simple. That's
an easy one.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Okay, you can all right, all right now, Oh boy, Susan.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
What would you do?
Speaker 1 (24:07):
What would you do? This is Mother in Law Audition.
I'm just can I just tell you this whole episode
is triggering me because my in laws could not stand me.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
It was awful.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
All Right, we're gonna play for a game segment. It's
going to be it's mother in Law Audition. We're going
to switch off reading hypotheticals and we're gonna give her. Yeah,
what would you do as to what we'd do as
the in laws in the situation? Okay, so I'm going
to start us off. So it's as if we're the
(24:39):
in laws. Okay, all right, your daughter in law cooks
dinner for the whole family, but it's barely edible. Do
you pretend to love it? Quietly order takeout? Offer a
cooking class for her birthday?
Speaker 3 (24:54):
What would you do, Susan, Well, obviously you can't order
take out.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
I would tried to help her learn how to cook,
not for her birthday, but I would take her a side.
I mean, obviously, if you fairly edible, some everybody there
is going to be obvious. But I would never embarrass her.
I would eat as much as I could.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Right, I would. I would not pretend to love it.
I would eat some of it, and then I would
do what you said. I would take her aside and say, sweetie,
I know you tried so hard on this meal, but
you know what, maybe it's just let's look at the positive.
Maybe it's just one bad meal. I cooked a meal once.
(25:40):
Let me just tell you, for friends, this is this
is when my husband, actually my husband cooked this meal
I'm wrong. We invited friends over and she was a
gourmet cook, unbelievable cook, and I was very nervous about
having them over. Well, Daryl decided to grill chicken on
our new barbecue. Well, and I tell you cooked. He
(26:01):
crucified this chicken. It was down to black. You know
that's right. It was worse than that burger Susan. You hit.
It went right to the bone, like the meat just
was gone. It was charred skin right to the But
so I was profusely apologizing. I was like, so embarrassed.
(26:23):
Do you know what she said? That's what made me
think about when I read this question. Our friend said,
this is delicious. I love barbecued chicken. Thank you so
much for having us. We just love your company. She
that was a on the way home probably, But the
point is we had fun. She didn't embarrass me. I was.
(26:44):
I was mortified, But yeah, I don't. I don't think
you pretend to love it. But I think you just eat.
And it might been my fat name. It might have
just been one meal at my barbecued chicken. Maybe it
wasn't you know.
Speaker 3 (26:57):
Maybe she's all right.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
Your son and daughter and law announce they are moving
to another country. Do you plan monthly visits, immediately guilt
trip them into staying, or act supportive while secretly sobbing
in your wine.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
I'd be planning my trips.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
I was just gonna say. I would be planning my trips.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
I'd be happy and excited for their experience that they're
going to have.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Yes, absolutely, and we agree, Kathy, I love it. Okay,
go do read the next one.
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
You catch your future daughter in law sneaking a cigarette
behind the house before family dinner and she thinks no
one saw. You know, this is something that really bothers
your son and has been discussed about it many times,
especially now that they're trying to get pregnant. Oh god,
do you pretend you didn't see it? Casually drop off
(28:00):
a pamphlet about lung hell or sneak her a lighter
for smity?
Speaker 1 (28:06):
What what.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
I picked? None of those?
Speaker 2 (28:13):
I would pick E and I whisper in her ear,
hell nhealthy it is?
Speaker 3 (28:17):
And something like that.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
I would not do any of that. I would walk
up to her quietly, and maybe not even that night,
but I would at some point quietly talk to her
and say.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
To her, but she they're asking about when we go
to the sun.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
And I'm saying I would not go to him. I
would quietly at some other time, not right then and there.
Call call her up. Let's call her Susan. Susan. I saw,
of course we do. I saw you smoking, and you
know that is between you and my son. However, I
(28:59):
think think it is not only are you trying to
get pregnant, but you're starting your marriage or relationship. It's
a lie. So you might want to think about that
because I think if you could get her to look
at it in a different light, that it's it's creating
a lie. It's a lie between them, never mind the
health of the baby and all that stuff. That's that's
what I think.
Speaker 3 (29:20):
Yeah, all right, you got the next one.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
Okay, here's the next one. Your son and a soon
to be wife insist on getting you addressed for their
wedding to make it special. When you get it, it's
absolutely hideous and does not work for you at all.
Do you wear it proudly? Try to talk to them
about it, or not say anything and just wear something else.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
That's easy.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
If they're insisting, I'm going to insist that they don't
do it without me.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
Because I'm a picky one.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
I was just going to say, yeah, I can't imagine
my son first of all, shopping, let's start.
Speaker 3 (29:57):
Does that does?
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Actually I had a friend who just was telling me
that they did buy a gay couple that just got married,
and they did pick out the outfit for But that's
a little different, you know. I mean, whatever I would,
I would, I would have to talk to them about
it and say, no, I have to try it on.
I have to like it.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
All right.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
You find out your daughter in law hates your famous
holiday cookies, do you switch recipes just for her, make
an extra and joke about it, tell her lovingly that
she's wrong.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Oh I'm interested in your answer because I know exactly
what I would do. What would you do, Susan?
Speaker 3 (30:37):
Oh, honey, you don't like this. That's a shame we
all do.
Speaker 1 (30:41):
See. I wouldn't. I would. I would make a joke
about it and say, you know, I uh, you know,
Susie Q over here didn't like my snicker doodles, so
I made so I made him. I know everyone else does, so.
Speaker 3 (30:54):
Susan, har try a different one.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah, yeah, I would make it. I would do it,
all right, Your son and daughter in law adopt a
giant dog that sheds everywhere. Well, can I just tell
you I'm never going to visit and invite you to
stay at their fur filled house. Do you pack a
lint roller and suck it up, make an excuse him
a hotel nearby, or confront them on the issue. Oh,
(31:17):
I know exactly what I would do.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
I mean, it's their dog, and if I'm going to visit,
I'm going to pack it.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
You know what. You know what I do because my
daughter has and her husband have a boxer, and I
love that dog, but oh my god, it's hair everywhere.
When I've stayed at their house, all I do is
close the bedroom door so that dog cannot get in
and get on my clothes. Vacuuming, Yes, Susan would be
sweeping it. She'd be She'd never mind, You'd be vacuuming
(31:45):
the dog. Oh god, all right, that was so much fun.
Thank you to all of our listeners. I've been traumatized
by all of this talk of mother in laws and
father in laws to all hair and dog hair, To
all all of you who are even contemplating getting married.
You will have a mother in law, You will have
(32:06):
a father in law. Remember, you're not just marrying the guy,
you're marrying the family. You're not just marrying the woman.
You're marrying the family.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
Get it right right Sometimes you can't help it though,
they call me back. But thank you everybody for joining us,
and be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we
have new episodes coming out every week, and I know
you don't want to miss anything.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
No, I mean, why would they want to miss it?
Next week we're going to talk about son and daughter
in laws, just see if we can traumatize everyone further.
But in the meantime, submit your questions to us. You
go to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or dm
us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour. We really do
want to hear from you.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iheartradiop
or wherever you listen to your podcast.
Speaker 3 (32:52):
Thank you have a great week.
Hosts And Creators
Joe Amabile
Susan Noles
Serena Pitt
Kathy Swarts
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