February 15, 2024 • 45 mins
Joe and Serena sit down with Lexi. Lexi tells us the full story behind her harrowing journey with endometriosis and just how special her moment of vulnerability with Joey in Malta really was. She also shares the behind-the-scenes deets of the iconic kiss that crowned her Mrs. Right at the group date pageant
Plus, she gives us her perspective on the Sydney/Maria drama, including her time alone with them leading up to their two-on-one. Listen now and make sure to follow!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, everyone, welcome back to Beat your Happy Hour. I'm
Joe and I'm Serena and we are here with Lexi
from Joey Sincy. Hi Lexi, Hi Lexi.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hey guys, your hair looks so good. You get it
done recently?
Speaker 3 (00:14):
Thank you.
Speaker 4 (00:14):
Yes, I actually just got it done when I came back.
I talked about this on my Instagram. But I had
a bit of a hair fiasco when I was in
the mansion. Some reason my hair turned red, which you know,
we love redheads, but like it was two red stripes
at the front. So when I was on the show,
(00:36):
luckily Jess had men's beard dye for her eyebrows and
let me use it to color correct. So my hair
is a lot darker on the show than it is usually.
But it's a funny story.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
So I just went, oh, my god, use men's I
didn't know. I have friends that dye their eyebrows, and
usually they just use boxed hair dye. I've never heard
of anyone using beard dye.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Yeah, just for men.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
But I guess that would make sense because it is
like hair on your face.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Right right. So God blessed Jess for having that, and
it was like dark, dark brown it's a funny story.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
Wait, why so I've heard of I've had friends who
have gone blonde and then like hard water will make
it look green. But I've never Are you a natural redhead?
Was it like stripping your eyelights?
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Something was happening.
Speaker 4 (01:23):
I'm naturally pretty dark brown, so I think it was
just like getting the highlights right before the show and
then using the water out there.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Or maybe I don't know. Something something happens that's good.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Crazy, I would be freaking out. I can't beieve they
couldn't get you like boxed hair dyed.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
You know it's a they tried their best.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Yeah, well you had the beard dye, thank god?
Speaker 3 (01:43):
So thank god.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
You know my beard actually used to come in a
little red. What Yeah, no, it does it now I
have Now they come in Now they come in gray
on my chant.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Ottle salt and peppery. Yeah, well maybe you should head
of Jess for her box beard died.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
I don't know if I would die my beard. I don't.
I don't keep it long enough to die it.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
I feel like you have to have a significant amount
of hair to be dying. Like I feel like it's
for people who have a full beard.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Why are you coming right now?
Speaker 2 (02:10):
What are you talking about coming? You say, I think
it's people who have like a full gray beard. I
want to dye it brown. So that's not great.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
I'm gonna just I'm going to lean into the salt
and pepper.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
You should you lean in cult public and Lexi, you
can stay away from you.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Isn't about me though, Solexi, where do you live?
Speaker 3 (02:30):
I currently am in Atlanta, Georgia, col.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
And you you said on on one of these episodes
that you moved to San Francisco for work and then
you moved to New York. So what do you do
and what what happened there?
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Yeah, so I've I've lived all over actually originally from Toronto.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
But I Toronto, I had to say, and I had
to say it too Ontario.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Oh nice.
Speaker 4 (03:00):
Yeah, So my family's all up there, my extended family,
but we ultimately moved down to the States for my
dad's job. So I ended up in Ohio for a
while and then yeah, after school, moved out to San
Francisco for work. I worked at the Gap when I
was out there, but I work in digital marketing and
digital strategy, so I work on their websites. I came
(03:21):
down with a lot of illness when I was in
San Francisco with my health and so ultimately made the
decision to move back to New York to be closer
to my family. And GAP also had a headquarters in
New York, so it just made sense at the time.
So yeah, that's how I ended up in the city.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
And do you still work for GAP now?
Speaker 3 (03:39):
I don't work for GAP now.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
I work for another large retail company in Atlanta doing
the same type of work.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Do you like Atlanta?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
I like Atlanta.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
It was a huge culture shock moving down here, like
being originally from Canada and then living on both coasts.
Moving to Atlanta was kind of crazy. It's super southern obviously,
and then like everyone here gets married at like twenty two,
so I was this like black sheet moving down here
single at like twenty nine. So I like it, but
it's different.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Yeah, that San Francisco has an exact opposite, it makes
me exact opposite. Literally, Yeah really might Okay? Cool? And
how did you How did you get on The Bachelor?
Speaker 4 (04:22):
It's a bit of a long story, but long story short,
I was originally supposed to go on and went through
the casting process for Peter season.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
And so wow a few years.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Yeah, which when I look back, I wouldn't have been
ready to do that at that point in my life
and age.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
So I'm so glad it happened when it did.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
But I had just had my endometriosis surgery, so it
wasn't the right time for me with filming. And then
I got in contact with a producer and they told
me it was going to be Joey and I was like,
this is so serendipitous, and I think he's such a
great guy. I just turned thirty, like why not. So
it's kind of crazy that Peter to Joey, like it's
(05:00):
I don't know. The whole thing was very full circle, that.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
Is you hear you hear some stories like that, Like
I think Caitlin Bristow was also something that was like
in casting for someone's season, we had like almost on
the show and then something happened or like she didn't
get on and then gets onto another season. I just
feel like it always falls the way it's supposed to exactly.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
I want to pronounce this correctly, so I don't son
a fucking war on.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
But you could do it. I could do it.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
I could do this, okay, So when you talk about
your endometriosis.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
You could say and I could just call it endo
ye ye Okay.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
I love that, Okay, So not that I don't love it.
But so when you had your ENDO surgery, how old
were you?
Speaker 4 (05:43):
I had my surgery in twenty nineteen, so I just
turned thirty. So yeah, I would have been twenty five
twenty six, And so that was a time period for
me that was crazy and like I said going on
the show, it wouldn't have been possible, but so grateful
that I did have the surgery when I was living
in New York.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
What was the process like, because I know you said
it took about a year and a half to have
it diagnosed, which correct me wrong, but I believe that's
not totally uncommon.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
No, you're yeah, you're exactly right. So really it was
ten years of me like in pain and not knowing
what was going on with my body. And then things
got a lot worse when like the back half of
San Francisco and when I moved to New York and
I just started going to so many different doctors appointments,
and like I was diagnosed with things I didn't even have,
Like I was diagnosed with autoimmune disorders and taking medications
(06:32):
for them, and I didn't have it, and I was
turned away from that, so so crazy.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
Like women, on average, it takes ten years to get
a diagnosis, per end of so like that's that was
my timeline and it's so sad to hear that. And
a lot of the times doctors will turn you to
like a psychiatrist or almost make you believe that your
pain is in your head because it has to be
diagnosed surgically. So it's that even adds another like of
(07:00):
complexity to get a diagnosis. So for me, it was
a lot of being like turned away kind of given
medication to treat me for something I didn't have. And
then I even started to doubt my pain and I
was like, is this even real?
Speaker 3 (07:13):
Is this something in my head? Just because I was
shut down so many times.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
That's so frustrating and it's just so scary that you
know you have to wait ten years to get diagnosial
something that you're probably like, I could have been treating
this ten years earlier. I can imagine too. By the
time the surgery option comes around, It's like, on one hand,
you're like, I'll do anything to figure out what's going
on with me. But on the another you're probably like,
(07:38):
I've had so many inaccurate diagnoses that diagnoses diagnosisis not diagnoses,
you know what I meant, but that it's like, is
this just going to be another dead end? Like it's
it's got It must have been so emotionally and physically
draining for you.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
It was.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
I remember walking into NYU that day, because you don't
know until you wake up from the surgery if you
have it or not, and I remember thinking do I
want to have this or do I not? Like do
you like it's a weird thing because like I've gone
through ten years of pain and multiple years of going
to appointments, and I felt like I finally kind of
had an answer. This doctor had a really strong hunch
(08:18):
I had it. But then I was like, wait a second,
the reality of actually having it is a whole other
thing to deal with, So I didn't. I didn't really
even know how to feel, like am I going to
be happy after this? Like if I go through the
surgery and I don't have it, I'm just at another
dead end.
Speaker 3 (08:32):
So yeah, it's really it plays with your mind.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
What has your journey like has. What has your journey
been like since being diagnosed.
Speaker 3 (08:42):
It's it's been an uphill battle.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
If I'm being honest, I have, you know, good weeks
and I have really bad weeks. I've been on so
many different medications to try to get it into a
place where it's controllable. I am at the point right
now where they want me to have a second surgery.
A lot of time women have two or three, but
because I'm thirty, they want me to have it as
(09:05):
close as possible to when I want to conceive. And
the reason for that is because they go in and
clean up all that tissue that's not supposed to be there,
so it puts you in like an optimal state to
have a child. That is really hard for me because
the only solve is something I can't even do at
this moment in time. And the reason they don't want
(09:26):
you to have too many surgeries is because they cause
a lot of scar tissue. And so just right now,
I kind of feel like I'm being pushed into a
corner of just having to power through the pain and
make the most of it.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
But uh, it is challenging.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Yeah, that's got to be such a hard decision because
you're really I'm assuming like you're probably advised by doctors,
but you have to probably make the decision evidably if
you're going to have the surgery and then potentially you
just have to have another surgery when you are ready
to have children, or if you're going to power through
the pain so that you don't have to have as
many surgeries. Like, there's not a clear right answer there.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
There's not, And I just froze my eggs.
Speaker 4 (10:02):
Actually I had the surgery for that a few weeks
before I went on the show, which, thank you, that
came with a lot of its own issues, but that
I'm trying my best to do everything I can to
become a mother.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
That's what I've wanted my whole life. But yeah, you're
exactly right.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Do you feel like the medical field now today, in
twenty twenty four is better detecting this opposed to ten
years ago. Are we kind of in the same place
of it's still very hard for it to get be
detected in women? Yeah, it's still going through that.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That's a great question.
Speaker 4 (10:39):
I would like to say that I would like to
say the diagnosis process has gotten better.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
I don't think it has.
Speaker 4 (10:45):
I think what's gotten better is the technology to.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Like an MRI.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
Now you can have where they can see if there's abnormalities.
It can't diagnose it, but it can at least point
in the direction that you might have something going on there,
which gives woman more confidence to have a surgery. However,
I still think like it's so I've posted on Instagram
about my experience and I got I think almost like
a thousand messages from women saying to me that I've
(11:10):
had the exact same experience. I'm currently in the process
of fighting for a diagnosis, Like I've gone to ten
plus appointments. No one's taking me seriously, so it's not
spoken about enough, and I don't I really don't think
it's changed that much, which is disheartening.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Yeah, I feel like, and I mean this is not endo,
but I someone in my life has PCOS and they
had a similar experience, where like there's a lot of
women's health issues. I feel like that the story is
connected to where it's like, it took me years for
someone to finally diagnose me with this, and I was
doing treatments that were actually like harming what I was
(11:48):
like actually had and yes, yeah.
Speaker 4 (11:50):
Yes, I went through bladder installations, which is I don't
need to get into the whole thing, but where they
like put like an acidic thing like.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
Through your urethruck it.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
I was crying, screaming and pain because they thought I
had a condition with my bladder, and like, I have
nothing wrong with my bladder. And like the fact I
went through that for six months, Like it's traumatic to me.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
So I have a lot of crazy Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:13):
Yeah, and it's just like the fact that doctor did it,
like all of the above, it's it's scary.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Yeah, a major flaw. Yeah, how does it affect you
on a day to day scale?
Speaker 3 (12:23):
On a day to day scale, like it's so unpredictable.
Speaker 4 (12:26):
Some days I'll have flares and like I'll look four
or five months pregnant from like swelling. Some days I'll
have horrible or back pain. I mean, it hits me
out of nowhere. I've become really good at managing it. So,
I mean, I work a really demanding job, like I'm
sitting at a desk all day. So I'm not going
to lie like it comes with its challenges and I
don't probably live the exact same life as someone who
(12:46):
wouldn't be dealing with this, But I've gotten to a
place now where, like I'm so strong mentally that I
just pushed through. I like take really good care of
my health. That helps to a degree, but it's one
of those things that's it's never leaving my life. There's
no cure, and so I've just learned how to like
have a better attitude about it and like make the
(13:07):
most of every day even though I have a little
bit of a handicap.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Is Stage five the most severe stage.
Speaker 4 (13:15):
So I actually so there's technically four stages of endo,
and on the show, I said five, it's four and
five are like five is kind of a new stage
that they're talking about. For me, I had endo growing
on my lung and so since it spread to like
an organ outside of my pelvis, I'm kind of four
or five. Stage four is technically the most severe phase
(13:37):
within your pelvis, and that just means that, like there's
a lot of adhesion, so like your uterus could be
attached to both ovaries. There's a lot of large thiss
and so even I like to preface though someone with
stage one could have equal pain as someone as stage four,
it's just how much the actual tissue has spread. It
doesn't mean that you're like in more pain or life
(14:00):
pain at a different stage.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
But if it gets detected at stage one, is it
curable or is it like.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
It's it's not.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
But I do think you could take actions with like
certain hormones and getting ahead of your surgery.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
Like for me, when they went in, it was so bad.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Like I think if they had gone in maybe three
years prior, like it wouldn't maybe have spread to my lung,
Like maybe I wouldn't have had so many adhesions.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Yeah, right, which, like that's another layer to it, I'm
sure is like the fact that it takes so long
means that it ends up being so much more severe
in the women when it does get detected. Yeah, exactly,
it's so frustrating. Okay, so yeah you get on the show.
We lost track, but I'm glad we're talking about this.
(14:49):
Obviously it was a big part of your one on
one day, which we will touch on as well in
this podcast and just talk more about you know, what
it was like opening up to Joey about do you
refer to it as a condition in what how do
you do it?
Speaker 4 (15:02):
I always say, yeah, a condition disease. I think for
me it's just something I deal with every day. But yeah,
I opened up to him about my condition and how
it impacts me.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yeah, okay, gotcha. Okay, Well let's do I want?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah, you step out of the limo, How you feeling,
What are your thoughts? What do you think about Joey
is your type?
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (15:27):
I was so nervous obviously that whole day leading up
to it, But when I stepped at the limo, I
felt I know, it sounds so cheesy, but like I
did feel immediately at ease because he has such a
chill personality and like demeanor that as soon as I
walked up to him, I kind of felt like I
know about this guy, like this is our first date
kind of I don't know, just felt very like an
(15:49):
initial intro, not like oh I'm on the Bachelor, and
there's all these cameras and lights, like it was really
just the two of us in that moment.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Very special. He was so kind. But then I walked
in the house and I realized I was the first one,
and so like that was a.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
Bit of a shock more than meeting Joey. I was like, oh, okay,
that was I'm glad I knew that after.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, that's so interesting. I always because sometimes they'll show
someone come out of the lemo, but they're not necessarily
the first one that actually came out of the lemo. Yeah,
like the little switch you through. But yeah, but I
feel like that's exciting because you probably like, Okay, I'm
the first girl in his mind tonight, which is kind
of cool. But I also would have been happy to
not know that.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Before saying I'm so glad they didn't tell me before,
because I think I would have been like, I got
to really pull it together, like he's been waiting for
this for months, like I gotta.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
I don't even know. I don't know. It's for the.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Best, for the best. So how does night one go?
I know, it's like the longest night ever, but we
get to talk to him.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
You guys know, it's a long night. I mean I
didn't anticipate it being that long, so it was. It
was a long night. I got really lucky and got
to talk to him. Not everyone did, so I was
fortunate for that. I gave him a ball marker from
the golf course my dad and I play in Hill
and Head, so he seemed excited that I golfed, and yeah,
we had a good talk.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
We kissed, which I was not expecting.
Speaker 4 (17:14):
Like all my friends back at home were like, what
this kind of off brand for me. I'm a little
like stand offish until I trust someone. But I guess
the trust that was already kind of there. I just
felt safe around him. But yeah, night when there was
stuff going on, but I kind of just kept to
myself and was nervous for the roast ceremony. But I
felt good about our talk.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
Nice, feel like that's like all you can ask for
out of night, Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
And then before so before currently you get your one
on one what's your connection? Like are you are you
able to spend any time with Joey? How's it going?
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Yeah? It was going well.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
I got to talk to him at the talent show
a little bit before we went out or excuse me,
the pageant, and I got to talk to him that evening.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So yeah, let's talk about the paget because missus right,
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Yeah that was so Yeah, I did I did, I should. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
There was a little animosity surrounding the kiss.
Speaker 4 (18:15):
How the kiss heard around the world. Yeah, there was
some animosity for sure, which I'm so conflict adverse, Like
I was like, it's fine, like someone else take the crown,
Like all good. I understand, you know, I think some
girls poured their heart and soul. They were doing flips
and cartwheels and singing, and I mean, they're all so talented.
(18:36):
I just stood there, but I was trying to think
of something that I could do to show him I
do come out of my shell and like I am
fun and bubbly. I'm not this like super quiet, serious,
reserved person.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
I think because I was nervous. That's how I had
been coming across. So I was like, let's do it.
Why not? You know, I took a tequila shot before,
but I did it. No.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
I liked it. I liked that your talent incorporated him
into it. I think that's always nice to like get
him involved. And like I said, when we were capping,
and I was like, you know what, sometimes you gotta
work smarter, not harder. Just because she wasn't upside down
doesn't mean she didn't have a good talent.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
Yeah, the other girls did great, so we all it
was fun.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
Did you do you have like a favorite group date
activity like that you've done up until this point?
Speaker 4 (19:26):
Up until this point, I think the wedding was fun
because one, I've just never thought i'd be in a
wedding dress before my wedding day. And then we all
got to have individual time with him to work the room.
At the reception, they didn't show everyone's but that was
like our second time actually talking and it felt comfortable
because it was just the two of us, like walking around,
(19:46):
we went to the bar. So I thought the wedding
was fun, that the pageant was really out of my
comfort zone, and then there was more group dates that
were a little more my speed further through this season.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Nice. Yeah, the pageant, the gimmicky ones are always a
little more awkward.
Speaker 4 (20:01):
Yeah, there's I'm just like, oh my gosh. Yeah, I'm
definitely an awkward person, So like being in that environment
just like an answer.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Yeah, no, it's it's tough.
Speaker 4 (20:12):
But I give those date planners credit because they always
they come together so well. But in the moment, you're
kind of like, all right, we're doing this, but then
you see it and you're like, this is awesome.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
So we get to Malta and you get your one
on one date with Joey, were you like, did you
have a sense that like maybe it was going to
be you that week, like your time was maybe coming
or were you totally surprised.
Speaker 4 (20:38):
Well, there's there's two pieces to this story. So the
first one is my luggage was lost. Upon arriving in Malta,
I was like, look, Joey's amazing. I want to be
on a date this week. Just whatever you do, do
not put me on a date tomorrow. Like I don't
have any of my stuff. I was the only girl.
It's just very like of course, uh and so's it
was funny when they called my name. I was like,
(21:00):
you know, I was really excited, and they ended up
finding my luggage, so it all worked out. But it
was just like I wasn't really prepared for at the
night before because of that conversation. So like I didn't like,
I didn't self tan, I didn't take a shower, like
little things that I would do if I knew I
was having gome on on one.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
But as soon as.
Speaker 4 (21:17):
I like got there with Joey, I was like, this
is I mean, it was the best day ever.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Yeah, no, it looks that's actually funny. On on my season,
Michelle Young, they she lost a piece of luggage and
like was never to be found, like it wasn't. It
wasn't the show, like the airline lost her luggage and
she never found it, and she was like borrowing her
roommate Ryan's clothes like the whole season because I think
like the one that she lost was like all her
(21:44):
clothes and jewelry, and like the one that she had
was like toilet trees and like shoes and stuff. So
she's like, I'm screwed, but I'm very glad that they
found your luggage. But that is funny because it's like
the one time you're like I don't want to date
tomorrow is the time that you're like, okay, I guess
on the dates.
Speaker 4 (22:01):
Just how life works out and on you know. It
was it was truly like I will remember that day
for the rest of my life. It was so fun,
Like I got to do the walking tour and I
travel a lot, so like getting to actually like walk
around the city and see Malta. It was it was
just casual and fun, like it didn't feel like we
were on a bachelor date.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Yeah. I always say like those are the best dates,
like just the ones that are the most organic. What
was it like being in that church? I know, you
kind of talked about your grandfather, Yeah, and you got
to interact with Yeah.
Speaker 3 (22:35):
So it was emotional. It was really emotional.
Speaker 4 (22:38):
It was I think being away from you, you know this,
like being away from your whole family, and then like
just your emotions are high and then you know, I
was in the church and I went to church with
my grandfather growing up, and he had passed away recently,
and because of COVID, I wasn't able to go to
the funeral, and just there was so many emotions that
just hit me at once. I felt like I hadn't
been in a church like that since I was with him,
(22:59):
And it was just a really full circle moment because
he always said he wanted to meet my person, and
like we both golfed together, like we were just so close,
and like that was at the end of the day
and so like that being kind of how we closed
out the date and just everything going so well with Joey,
I just felt like I was really supposed to be
there in that moment.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Uh. It was. Yeah, it was very special.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
And then the priest came over and talked to us
about what makes a healthy marriage and talked about a
couple that he's married in the church and yeah, he
just gave us some advice and it was Yeah, it
was it was beautiful.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
I'm excited to watch that back.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Yeah, are you starting to feel like Joey could be
your person? Is that happening yet?
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Yeah? For sure, I think.
Speaker 4 (23:43):
I mean I was definitely starting to think like, oh, okay,
this is like I'm not just on here, you know,
to meet someone and see if there's something there. Like
I'm like, the something there is there. It's just a
matter of like kind of getting down, like opening up
with a big thing for me that night, Like I
wanted to open up about my health with him because
(24:05):
I wanted to make sure like that wasn't something that
you know, he wouldn't want to that could affect his
decision with me. So at that point, I was like,
the feelings are there. I just think we need to
kind of figure out under the covers, like our values,
what we want long term in our timelines. Timelines was
a huge thing for me.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
Yeah we we we see you mentioned and we definitely
don't have to go there if you're uncomfortable talking about it.
But your past with your acts of it being an
issue for him, do you want to talk about that
at all.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
Yeah, I can touch on it.
Speaker 4 (24:38):
I think, you know, for him, my health did was
ultimately something that impacted the end of our relationship. I
think he saw it as I would never say a burden,
but you know, just something that would potentially affect you know,
us being able to have a family long term or
you know, my ability to be a mother, like I'm
(24:59):
not always is one hundred percent every day, And so
for him, he saw that as sometimes a challenge, which
you can imagine on my side, like is really difficult
because you know, when we broke up, like hearing from
multiple people that it was like he just wasn't sure
he could handle your health condition, He wasn't sure that
he could support you in the way that you need
(25:19):
to be supported. And for me it was very much like,
but I mean, I do a really good job at
like holding my pain in and not showing it outwardly.
So I'm already self conscious about this, and to hear
it was like one of the deciding factors to ultimately
not move towards a marriage with me, like has made
me not want to open up about any of this
(25:40):
with another person.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
Yeah, I can imagine that being on TV opening up
to Joey this new relationship about your endo is already scary,
and then to have that added layer of like, well,
the last time I did this, it ended the relationship. Yeah,
is just a whole other life of like anxiety exactly.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
I mean, you said it perfectly, but I felt I
had to because on the show, you have such limited time,
and so I wanted to be fair to Joey. And
if it's Joey was never going to go in and
say like I don't want to be with you because
you can't have kids. That's not the That's not the
conversation that we were having. It was more like, hey,
I'm dealing with x Y and Z. I might be
(26:23):
on a little bit more of an expedited timeline than
some of these other girls that are here because of
x Y and Z. Like how does that make you feel?
And I genuinely wanted his reaction because it's okay if
he wants, you know, five to seven years before kids.
And I'm not saying that's what he said, but like
his emotions and reaction are valid, and I would rather
(26:43):
have that early on than like drag out a connection
and then it come up later that to me wouldn't
be fair to him totally.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
That totally makes sense because if he were to say,
like I'm not ready to have kids, I don't want
a family for ten years, or like I don't I mean,
we know he wants kids, but like, it's a serious
conversation to have and it's one that you know you
have added layers to add to. So how did that
conversation go? Like, obviously you did an amazing job of
expressing yourself, he saw. How did it feel, you know,
(27:13):
hearing Joe's response.
Speaker 4 (27:15):
Hearing Joe's response was well, like probably forever changed my
perception on opening up about this in my life and
my story and my health and relationships. He I mean,
he brought me to tears that night. It was he
was so genuine and sincere and such a good listener.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
I felt heard. I didn't feel judged or like analyzed.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
I felt like he was really just listening to me
and empathetic to what I went through. He related to
me in many ways in his own personal life, and
he was like, look, that's not an issue for me.
Like I think with the right person, whoever that is
for him, that they would figure it out. And you
know that could be through things like adopt or you know,
(28:01):
surrogacy whatever. That looks like kids are important to him
as well, but that's not going to be detrimental to
his choice and moving.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
Forward with me. And yeah, he was just he was
so kind that night and it was it was really beautiful.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
That's amazing. Yeah, I feel like he's really demonstrated.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
Like we said, he's the he's the best receiver joke.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
He's like, he's an amazing receiver.
Speaker 4 (28:25):
He he's an incredible he's also he's such a good
listener and he's yeah, he's he's he was raised well
like he is, but you know what it is, he's
just a kind person. So he actually cares because you'll
talk to some people and it's like you can tell
they're registering it, but like kind of fifty percent and
fifty percent out, Like he was locked in. I mean,
he was listening to me. And in a situation like that,
(28:47):
it's so important.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Okay, so let's let's jump a little bit too. Yeah,
your thoughts on the Maria fiasco and why we want
I want your opinion on two situations, but the first one,
what were your thoughts on just the Maria in Sydney
of it all.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
Yeah, because we also know that you were the only
one there before they went on to them, because everyone
else is on the group day.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
I forgot.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
Yeah, I guess, yeah, I can start.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
My initial thoughts were back at the mansion is where
I think that conversation should have been left. I think,
you know, everyone's emotions and feelings are valid, Medina's were valid.
At the mansion, Sidney was trying to stand up for
her friend, and Maria was trying to, you know, advocate
for herself and say, hey, I did not bring this
up in any way, shape or form to hurt someone.
(29:40):
I brought this up just because I wanted to know
who was talking and kind of you know, clear her
name in the situation, because she didn't mean her come
in a mean way. There was no bad intentions there.
It's hard. I really think this dragged on for too long.
It took away time from a lot of girls that
had also their own beautiful stories to tell, and so
(30:01):
I wish it was left at the mansion.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
I think it.
Speaker 4 (30:04):
I think the initial conversation could have just been squashed,
but it continued on, obviously right to Malta in Spain
and and throughout the season and that day that it
was just the three of us, Like you could cut
the tension with a knife. I mean you could just tell,
like tensions are high, they're going on a two on one.
They're fully aware of what that comes with, right, Like
(30:26):
I think the date card that I got, of course
me had to read it was like one rows, two girls,
one stay as one goes, And I was like, I
was even just like I got to go to my room, like.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
Here's the card, how do we get that down?
Speaker 3 (30:39):
I like toss that out the window at the hotel.
But yeah, it was it was.
Speaker 4 (30:45):
I I did sit down with both of them, both
of their you know, they they were they were stressed.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Who do if you had to put money on it
before they went on that date, who did you think
was coming back?
Speaker 2 (30:56):
That's a good question.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
That is a good question.
Speaker 4 (30:58):
I think based on what I saw, I thought Maria
and Joey had a stronger connection. I was on both
group dates with Maria.
Speaker 3 (31:07):
I was on one group date with Sydney and she
didn't have one the first week, So I just thought
I could always tell there was something there between Joey
and Maria. Like I tell by the way he looked
at her. I think he was intrigued by.
Speaker 4 (31:19):
Her personality, like she is very outgoing, So I kind
of thought, if it was solely based on connection, Maria
was going to come back.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
We saw when Sydney's suitcase gets pulled Leah Jess. I'm
sure there was a few other people, but those were
the two main ones. I remember were very surprised that
Sidney was going home. Where do you think their shot
came from? Do you think it was like wishful thinking
or do you think you know?
Speaker 4 (31:48):
I think it was rooted in the fact that they
have their own perception of this.
Speaker 3 (31:52):
They're very close to Sidney.
Speaker 4 (31:53):
They were you know, when you're on this experience, you
form strong relationships because it's so unique, and they were,
you know, really good friends with her, and they heard
her side of the story, and they weren't as close
to Maria.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
So I think it was twofold.
Speaker 4 (32:08):
I think it was oh, Maria's still staying like they
were upset about that, and then I think it was
also like we're losing our friend here.
Speaker 3 (32:16):
But that night was hard.
Speaker 4 (32:17):
I mean, I'm not gonna lie like I've since had
a conversation with Maria and apologize to her because I
wish I spoke up that night and it's like, you know,
you go through this, everyone has their like regrets. But
when she walked in, it was silent, and I wish
that I had said, like, look, today must have been
hard for both of you, but like, I'm proud of
(32:40):
you forgetting the rose, and like I I know Joey
made that decision for a reason. She didn't deserve to
walk into a silent room, like that wasn't fair to her.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
Yeah, yeah, I can imagine that would have been super horrible.
Speaker 1 (32:53):
Everyone's like yeah, because then you walk in and you
you're kind of on this a little bit of a
high because at least you're still there and he gives
you a rose, and then everybody's.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Like, oh, guys, it was bad. Like it was bad,
but like it was, it was bad. It was bad.
It was quiet. It was because you know, she didn't
do anything wrong.
Speaker 4 (33:10):
She was she's also dating Joey, so he made the
choice and she came back and she didn't deserve to
walk into that.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
So but then we do see Leyah, the Leyah Jess
call calling her Maria bitch and all, well, I was
going to refer to Leah pulled Medina aside and said, like,
you were so nice to her when she came in.
(33:39):
Was that like later in the night then, like do
you think Medina maybe had those same feelings you did?
Of like that was really awkward, Like I'm gonna go
say something to Maria, just basically saying like hey, happy
you're back, you look great, like hope your hope your
day was good.
Speaker 4 (33:53):
Here's the thing, like, yes, she brought up the initial
comment so people could say, like, why is she not
still involved? But her and Maria said so at the
end of the day at that point, she was not
involved anymore. I think that the description or maybe what
was mis confused was like Leah and Sidney were so close,
so I think Leyah was standing up for her friend,
(34:14):
but Medina didn't really do anything wrong, like she were
allowed to be friends with multiple people right across different groups,
Like that's inevitable with thirty two women. So I just
again it was kind of like why are we still
dragging this on in Spain?
Speaker 1 (34:27):
You know, yeah, totally, who are your friends in the house.
Speaker 4 (34:31):
I was really good friends with Kelsey A. She's an
amazing human. I think Madina's great Maria, the sisters, Evelyn, Chrisa.
I mean, I could go on like just Daisy's wonderful,
but you know, I think obviously you gravitate to certain people,
and like Kelsey A, Caitlin, Medina and I were definitely
the closest.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
Nice I do want to jump back to what you
were asking, which was which was what is your take
on the blow up between Jess and Maria.
Speaker 4 (35:05):
It was crazy to watch, and I think there was
a lot of built up emotion. You know, everyone gets that,
like it's a pent up anger that's like week after
week after week. And like in Malta, Sinney went home
and Jess and Sidney were such good friends, are such
good friends, and you know, I think Jess and Maria
like you can go back to kind of night one,
(35:25):
right when Jess kissed him twice, like there's been like
people kind of poking the bear, and I think in
Spain it finally just erupted and Jets obviously called Maria
a name, and you know, I don't think that was
warranted at all, and I do think that they've they
had the opportunity to talk that night, but it was
(35:47):
it was crazy, It was very explosive.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Yeah, I would say I feel like as much as
there was a lot of Sydney Maria confrontation, that was
like the most heated moment I've seen, Like there was
a lot of emotion behind that one. We do see
you like console Maria when she's kind of trying, yeah,
to leave with the Leyah drama. You just say, you know,
it's okay. You've been like pushed and pushed and pushed,
so like it's okay that you're having a moment. And
(36:10):
then we see you make a comment in regards to
the Jess and Maria argument where you say, you know,
I think there might be some jealousy on Jess's side.
Do you think that Maria now getting this attention and
reassurance from Joey kind of rubbed some people the wrong way,
especially maybe the girls that were friends with Sidney.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (36:29):
Look, I mean, I'm thirty, I'm confident in who I am.
If I was on this twenty four, i'd be jealous
of Maria too, Like she's so confident, she's stunning, Like
she's seemingly good at everything. The girls like doing like
you know, backflips across the stage, like she's hilarious. I mean, right,
it's intimidating to be in a room with someone like that.
I'm not I don't know if if it was jealousy
(36:50):
with Jess or if it was more just like the
personal uh feeling like personally attacked as her best friend
went home because of an output of Maria's action. But
I do think, yeah, I think that some of the
younger girls in the house, which I hate to say
that because this whole season feels like it's been about age,
but like, I think someone at twenty four and someone
at thirty one are in a different phase of life,
(37:13):
and I think sometimes there might have been some jealousy
there just seeing how strong of a connection Marian and
Joey had.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Was it at least entertaining? I mean, because you guys
don't have anything to do.
Speaker 3 (37:27):
You guys, I was just eating charcuterie and having sangria,
which was.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Great and as you should in Spain, sounds.
Speaker 3 (37:35):
Terrible, but yeah, I was. I was. I wasn't like
entertained by people feeling sad, but I was like, it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
Yeah, no, I get it out of the two places
so far that you traveled to. Which one do you favor? Spain?
Speaker 3 (37:53):
Well, I love, I love Spain. I took Spanish all
through college and like, I love the culture. But if
I'm thinking about just like the experience there Malta.
Speaker 4 (38:01):
Because of the date, the one on one, I got
to see so much of Malta. When Jesse told us Malta,
I don't I don't know if it was dumb or like,
I just didn't know where that was.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
I was just going to ask you that because like
I feel like no one has even heard of it.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
I was like, is it a country? Is it a city?
Like where is it located?
Speaker 3 (38:19):
I was like, are we going to Asia? Like I
didn't know?
Speaker 4 (38:22):
And so I he said international and like I hate flying.
It was the whole thing I was taking in a
lot in that moment. But the fifteen hours to Turkey
was like I thought we were going to Nashville.
Speaker 3 (38:32):
The rumor in the house was we were going to Nashville.
So like I really had to like shift my mind, like,
oh no, We're going to Turkey. Like anyways, I loved Malta.
It's beautiful.
Speaker 4 (38:42):
It's right below the boot in Sicily, and I feel like,
I mean, it was a dream.
Speaker 3 (38:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Yeah, I saw when Maria when they were on there too,
and when Maria was like, we're only a thirty minute
boat ride from Sicily, I'm like, oh that's kind of cool.
Like yeah, it's like maybe we'll go to Sicily and
then we'll go to Malta.
Speaker 3 (38:57):
Yeah, you guys should go.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
Okay, we are going to get into a game with
you before we let you go. It's super it's rapid fire.
It's just like all easy, fun questions about you and yeah,
you ready, I guess, let's do it. Okay. What is
your go to breakfast?
Speaker 4 (39:16):
Go to breakfast is probably an Osi you bowl. I
love them. I like make one every morning.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
You make it at home?
Speaker 3 (39:22):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 4 (39:23):
I used to buy them, but they're like twenty dollars eat,
so I was like, this is not fiscally responsible. So
I get the little package and whole foods and like
you know, like for the granola and some fruit.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
Oh my gosh. So yeah, what is your favorite color
to wear?
Speaker 3 (39:37):
Green?
Speaker 2 (39:38):
Which I mean perfect do green eyes?
Speaker 3 (39:41):
They're like green blue. I don't know, it changed, it
kind of changed with my emotions. Sometimes people would say
that like if I cry, they get more green and
then if I'm so interesting.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
Oh my gosh, it's like a Disney character. What's your
favorite season?
Speaker 4 (39:56):
My favorite season, I mean typical answer, but fall. Love
the fall and everything that comes with it. Halloween is
my favorite holiday.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
Halloween to be your holiday.
Speaker 3 (40:06):
I love Halloween. I know that's so retroversial. It is rare.
Speaker 4 (40:10):
I just I love like spooky things. And I know
it's like leading up to Thanksgiving.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
I don't know, I love is that weird? I just
feel like, yeah, I.
Speaker 1 (40:21):
Just don't like dressing I just don't like dressing up.
But I love the idea, you know.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
Spooky season. Yeah, I love like we'll get like fall candles.
Speaker 4 (40:28):
Like yeah, like passing out candy, like you know, Christmas
is on its way. Yeah, it's a good time.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
What is a big green flag for you?
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Good relationship with their family?
Speaker 2 (40:40):
What a relationship deal breaker for you?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
A relationship deal breaker would be someone who.
Speaker 4 (40:50):
Cheats, for sure, or someone who's not driven in their
career or I shouldn't even say their career, but like
not passionate about what they're doing in their life.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
What's your dream vacation destination.
Speaker 3 (41:02):
I want to go to Japan so badly.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
We are saying maybe this we might go Joe's bend.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
Ben It's amazing, Is it amazing? Yeah, we want to
try to go this year.
Speaker 3 (41:13):
You guys have to tish.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
We'll see, we'll see if it happens. I'm hoping it,
cross my fingers. What's one thing on your bucket list?
Speaker 4 (41:24):
I think on the bucket list would be I really
want to run like a marathon or a triathlon, just
because when I was originally diagnosed with like all my
health stuff, they were like, you probably won't be able
to do like extreme sports or anything that's really hard
on your body anymore, which like growing up playing sports
that was devastating for me to hear.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
And I kind of want to prove my doctor's wrong and.
Speaker 4 (41:44):
Be like, even though I like because it's a long
time and heard on your body, so they're worried it
might like exasperate my symptoms or make me feel like
a lot worse with my back. So I kind of
want to like run one and then give my doctor,
like my like bib to put in their off.
Speaker 1 (41:58):
Yeah, you should do it the city if you if
you could run it anywhere, were would you want to run?
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Probably New York?
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Joe did the New York Marathon this past night.
Speaker 1 (42:07):
Yeah, it was it's they say it's they it's I
didn't know that. They say New York's one of the
harder courses. Yeah, but yeah, it was very rewarding. I
did on the right under four hours, so it was
three three fifty eight, three fifty eight.
Speaker 2 (42:23):
Yeah, and I did not run it.
Speaker 3 (42:25):
I didn't.
Speaker 2 (42:27):
No, I told one of the signs I did. I
had a sign that said run joe Run, I love it.
What is Oh? Do you have any tattoos?
Speaker 3 (42:36):
I do not, but I'm not a post to them.
I just haven't found the right thing. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
What's your favorite physical quality of Joey's physical quality?
Speaker 3 (42:46):
His eyes?
Speaker 4 (42:47):
I feel like everyone probably says that, but not even
just since the color, like they're very kind.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
Yeah, what is your or who is your go to
when you need advice?
Speaker 4 (42:57):
My best friend again we she was my first friend
and when I reached the United States and she's more
like a sister.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
What is your favorite beauty product? At the moment, I know,
I'm struggling to read them, like, wait, what is this?
Speaker 4 (43:11):
So I know the answer to this one the Elf
lip oil because on the show, all the girls use
the dr one, but it's so expensive and I just
can't justify that. So the Elf one's like nine dollars
and it's amazing.
Speaker 2 (43:23):
Oh my god, that's a good due.
Speaker 3 (43:24):
To do, not to do a product placement.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
No, let me.
Speaker 1 (43:27):
See, I love Elf is blown up because of that.
Speaker 2 (43:32):
Yes, because the Oil Good Job Joe podcast we're just
talking about the other day of Clarence has a good
a good dupe for it as well. What is your
favorite memory of your time on the show.
Speaker 3 (43:47):
My favorite memory is would be the dinner with Joey.
Speaker 4 (43:50):
It was one just like an incredibly beautiful setting and
then it was something like it was something I didn't
even know its possible to have in a relationship, like
his reaction really changing how I view dating and myself.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
That's amazing. And then to end it off, can you
give us a teaser for what's to come this season?
Speaker 4 (44:10):
I think what's to come this season? I think, you know,
obviously it's a very romantic season. I think Joey has
an incredible cast of women, so there's going to be
stronger relationships starting to form, and I think with that
comes heightened emotions.
Speaker 3 (44:24):
Obviously some drama.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
You know, that's continuing from previous episodes, but I really
think the rest of the season is just going to
focus on the love stories. And yeah, I'm just hopeful
that Joey, he's very deserving to find his person, and
hopeful every hopefully everyone gets to watch that come to life.
Speaker 1 (44:40):
Nice, amazing, LEXI, thank you so much for coming on
beat your Happy Hour.
Speaker 3 (44:45):
Thank you guys for having me.
Speaker 1 (44:46):
Of course, thank you to all our listeners for joining us.
Speaker 2 (44:50):
And of course a big thank you to our listeners.
Make sure to subscribe, but we have new episodes of
Happy Hour every single week, with exclusive interviews and episode
recaps all season long. Thanks for listening.
Speaker 1 (45:02):
Bye bye
Speaker 3 (45:06):
Mm hmm.
Hey, everyone, welcome back to Beat your Happy Hour. I'm
Joe and I'm Serena and we are here with Lexi
from Joey Sincy. Hi Lexi, Hi Lexi.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hey guys, your hair looks so good. You get it
done recently?
Speaker 3 (00:14):
Thank you.
Speaker 4 (00:14):
Yes, I actually just got it done when I came back.
I talked about this on my Instagram. But I had
a bit of a hair fiasco when I was in
the mansion. Some reason my hair turned red, which you know,
we love redheads, but like it was two red stripes
at the front. So when I was on the show,
(00:36):
luckily Jess had men's beard dye for her eyebrows and
let me use it to color correct. So my hair
is a lot darker on the show than it is usually.
But it's a funny story.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
So I just went, oh, my god, use men's I
didn't know. I have friends that dye their eyebrows, and
usually they just use boxed hair dye. I've never heard
of anyone using beard dye.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Yeah, just for men.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
But I guess that would make sense because it is
like hair on your face.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Right right. So God blessed Jess for having that, and
it was like dark, dark brown it's a funny story.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
Wait, why so I've heard of I've had friends who
have gone blonde and then like hard water will make
it look green. But I've never Are you a natural redhead?
Was it like stripping your eyelights?
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Something was happening.
Speaker 4 (01:23):
I'm naturally pretty dark brown, so I think it was
just like getting the highlights right before the show and
then using the water out there.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Or maybe I don't know. Something something happens that's good.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Crazy, I would be freaking out. I can't beieve they
couldn't get you like boxed hair dyed.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
You know it's a they tried their best.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Yeah, well you had the beard dye, thank god?
Speaker 3 (01:43):
So thank god.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
You know my beard actually used to come in a
little red. What Yeah, no, it does it now I
have Now they come in Now they come in gray
on my chant.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Ottle salt and peppery. Yeah, well maybe you should head
of Jess for her box beard died.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
I don't know if I would die my beard. I don't.
I don't keep it long enough to die it.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
I feel like you have to have a significant amount
of hair to be dying. Like I feel like it's
for people who have a full beard.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Why are you coming right now?
Speaker 2 (02:10):
What are you talking about coming? You say, I think
it's people who have like a full gray beard. I
want to dye it brown. So that's not great.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
I'm gonna just I'm going to lean into the salt
and pepper.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
You should you lean in cult public and Lexi, you
can stay away from you.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Isn't about me though, Solexi, where do you live?
Speaker 3 (02:30):
I currently am in Atlanta, Georgia, col.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
And you you said on on one of these episodes
that you moved to San Francisco for work and then
you moved to New York. So what do you do
and what what happened there?
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Yeah, so I've I've lived all over actually originally from Toronto.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
But I Toronto, I had to say, and I had
to say it too Ontario.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Oh nice.
Speaker 4 (03:00):
Yeah, So my family's all up there, my extended family,
but we ultimately moved down to the States for my
dad's job. So I ended up in Ohio for a
while and then yeah, after school, moved out to San
Francisco for work. I worked at the Gap when I
was out there, but I work in digital marketing and
digital strategy, so I work on their websites. I came
(03:21):
down with a lot of illness when I was in
San Francisco with my health and so ultimately made the
decision to move back to New York to be closer
to my family. And GAP also had a headquarters in
New York, so it just made sense at the time.
So yeah, that's how I ended up in the city.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
And do you still work for GAP now?
Speaker 3 (03:39):
I don't work for GAP now.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
I work for another large retail company in Atlanta doing
the same type of work.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Do you like Atlanta?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
I like Atlanta.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
It was a huge culture shock moving down here, like
being originally from Canada and then living on both coasts.
Moving to Atlanta was kind of crazy. It's super southern obviously,
and then like everyone here gets married at like twenty two,
so I was this like black sheet moving down here
single at like twenty nine. So I like it, but
it's different.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Yeah, that San Francisco has an exact opposite, it makes
me exact opposite. Literally, Yeah really might Okay? Cool? And
how did you How did you get on The Bachelor?
Speaker 4 (04:22):
It's a bit of a long story, but long story short,
I was originally supposed to go on and went through
the casting process for Peter season.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
And so wow a few years.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Yeah, which when I look back, I wouldn't have been
ready to do that at that point in my life
and age.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
So I'm so glad it happened when it did.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
But I had just had my endometriosis surgery, so it
wasn't the right time for me with filming. And then
I got in contact with a producer and they told
me it was going to be Joey and I was like,
this is so serendipitous, and I think he's such a
great guy. I just turned thirty, like why not. So
it's kind of crazy that Peter to Joey, like it's
(05:00):
I don't know. The whole thing was very full circle, that.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
Is you hear you hear some stories like that, Like
I think Caitlin Bristow was also something that was like
in casting for someone's season, we had like almost on
the show and then something happened or like she didn't
get on and then gets onto another season. I just
feel like it always falls the way it's supposed to exactly.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
I want to pronounce this correctly, so I don't son
a fucking war on.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
But you could do it. I could do it.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
I could do this, okay, So when you talk about
your endometriosis.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
You could say and I could just call it endo
ye ye Okay.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
I love that, Okay, So not that I don't love it.
But so when you had your ENDO surgery, how old
were you?
Speaker 4 (05:43):
I had my surgery in twenty nineteen, so I just
turned thirty. So yeah, I would have been twenty five
twenty six, And so that was a time period for
me that was crazy and like I said going on
the show, it wouldn't have been possible, but so grateful
that I did have the surgery when I was living
in New York.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
What was the process like, because I know you said
it took about a year and a half to have
it diagnosed, which correct me wrong, but I believe that's
not totally uncommon.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
No, you're yeah, you're exactly right. So really it was
ten years of me like in pain and not knowing
what was going on with my body. And then things
got a lot worse when like the back half of
San Francisco and when I moved to New York and
I just started going to so many different doctors appointments,
and like I was diagnosed with things I didn't even have,
Like I was diagnosed with autoimmune disorders and taking medications
(06:32):
for them, and I didn't have it, and I was
turned away from that, so so crazy.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
Like women, on average, it takes ten years to get
a diagnosis, per end of so like that's that was
my timeline and it's so sad to hear that. And
a lot of the times doctors will turn you to
like a psychiatrist or almost make you believe that your
pain is in your head because it has to be
diagnosed surgically. So it's that even adds another like of
(07:00):
complexity to get a diagnosis. So for me, it was
a lot of being like turned away kind of given
medication to treat me for something I didn't have. And
then I even started to doubt my pain and I
was like, is this even real?
Speaker 3 (07:13):
Is this something in my head? Just because I was
shut down so many times.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
That's so frustrating and it's just so scary that you
know you have to wait ten years to get diagnosial
something that you're probably like, I could have been treating
this ten years earlier. I can imagine too. By the
time the surgery option comes around, It's like, on one hand,
you're like, I'll do anything to figure out what's going
on with me. But on the another you're probably like,
(07:38):
I've had so many inaccurate diagnoses that diagnoses diagnosisis not diagnoses,
you know what I meant, but that it's like, is
this just going to be another dead end? Like it's
it's got It must have been so emotionally and physically
draining for you.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
It was.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
I remember walking into NYU that day, because you don't
know until you wake up from the surgery if you
have it or not, and I remember thinking do I
want to have this or do I not? Like do
you like it's a weird thing because like I've gone
through ten years of pain and multiple years of going
to appointments, and I felt like I finally kind of
had an answer. This doctor had a really strong hunch
(08:18):
I had it. But then I was like, wait a second,
the reality of actually having it is a whole other
thing to deal with, So I didn't. I didn't really
even know how to feel, like am I going to
be happy after this? Like if I go through the
surgery and I don't have it, I'm just at another
dead end.
Speaker 3 (08:32):
So yeah, it's really it plays with your mind.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
What has your journey like has. What has your journey
been like since being diagnosed.
Speaker 3 (08:42):
It's it's been an uphill battle.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
If I'm being honest, I have, you know, good weeks
and I have really bad weeks. I've been on so
many different medications to try to get it into a
place where it's controllable. I am at the point right
now where they want me to have a second surgery.
A lot of time women have two or three, but
because I'm thirty, they want me to have it as
(09:05):
close as possible to when I want to conceive. And
the reason for that is because they go in and
clean up all that tissue that's not supposed to be there,
so it puts you in like an optimal state to
have a child. That is really hard for me because
the only solve is something I can't even do at
this moment in time. And the reason they don't want
(09:26):
you to have too many surgeries is because they cause
a lot of scar tissue. And so just right now,
I kind of feel like I'm being pushed into a
corner of just having to power through the pain and
make the most of it.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
But uh, it is challenging.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Yeah, that's got to be such a hard decision because
you're really I'm assuming like you're probably advised by doctors,
but you have to probably make the decision evidably if
you're going to have the surgery and then potentially you
just have to have another surgery when you are ready
to have children, or if you're going to power through
the pain so that you don't have to have as
many surgeries. Like, there's not a clear right answer there.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
There's not, And I just froze my eggs.
Speaker 4 (10:02):
Actually I had the surgery for that a few weeks
before I went on the show, which, thank you, that
came with a lot of its own issues, but that
I'm trying my best to do everything I can to
become a mother.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
That's what I've wanted my whole life. But yeah, you're
exactly right.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Do you feel like the medical field now today, in
twenty twenty four is better detecting this opposed to ten
years ago. Are we kind of in the same place
of it's still very hard for it to get be
detected in women? Yeah, it's still going through that.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That's a great question.
Speaker 4 (10:39):
I would like to say that I would like to
say the diagnosis process has gotten better.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
I don't think it has.
Speaker 4 (10:45):
I think what's gotten better is the technology to.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Like an MRI.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
Now you can have where they can see if there's abnormalities.
It can't diagnose it, but it can at least point
in the direction that you might have something going on there,
which gives woman more confidence to have a surgery. However,
I still think like it's so I've posted on Instagram
about my experience and I got I think almost like
a thousand messages from women saying to me that I've
(11:10):
had the exact same experience. I'm currently in the process
of fighting for a diagnosis, Like I've gone to ten
plus appointments. No one's taking me seriously, so it's not
spoken about enough, and I don't I really don't think
it's changed that much, which is disheartening.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Yeah, I feel like, and I mean this is not endo,
but I someone in my life has PCOS and they
had a similar experience, where like there's a lot of
women's health issues. I feel like that the story is
connected to where it's like, it took me years for
someone to finally diagnose me with this, and I was
doing treatments that were actually like harming what I was
(11:48):
like actually had and yes, yeah.
Speaker 4 (11:50):
Yes, I went through bladder installations, which is I don't
need to get into the whole thing, but where they
like put like an acidic thing like.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
Through your urethruck it.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
I was crying, screaming and pain because they thought I
had a condition with my bladder, and like, I have
nothing wrong with my bladder. And like the fact I
went through that for six months, Like it's traumatic to me.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
So I have a lot of crazy Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:13):
Yeah, and it's just like the fact that doctor did it,
like all of the above, it's it's scary.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Yeah, a major flaw. Yeah, how does it affect you
on a day to day scale?
Speaker 3 (12:23):
On a day to day scale, like it's so unpredictable.
Speaker 4 (12:26):
Some days I'll have flares and like I'll look four
or five months pregnant from like swelling. Some days I'll
have horrible or back pain. I mean, it hits me
out of nowhere. I've become really good at managing it. So,
I mean, I work a really demanding job, like I'm
sitting at a desk all day. So I'm not going
to lie like it comes with its challenges and I
don't probably live the exact same life as someone who
(12:46):
wouldn't be dealing with this, But I've gotten to a
place now where, like I'm so strong mentally that I
just pushed through. I like take really good care of
my health. That helps to a degree, but it's one
of those things that's it's never leaving my life. There's
no cure, and so I've just learned how to like
have a better attitude about it and like make the
(13:07):
most of every day even though I have a little
bit of a handicap.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Is Stage five the most severe stage.
Speaker 4 (13:15):
So I actually so there's technically four stages of endo,
and on the show, I said five, it's four and
five are like five is kind of a new stage
that they're talking about. For me, I had endo growing
on my lung and so since it spread to like
an organ outside of my pelvis, I'm kind of four
or five. Stage four is technically the most severe phase
(13:37):
within your pelvis, and that just means that, like there's
a lot of adhesion, so like your uterus could be
attached to both ovaries. There's a lot of large thiss
and so even I like to preface though someone with
stage one could have equal pain as someone as stage four,
it's just how much the actual tissue has spread. It
doesn't mean that you're like in more pain or life
(14:00):
pain at a different stage.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
But if it gets detected at stage one, is it
curable or is it like.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
It's it's not.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
But I do think you could take actions with like
certain hormones and getting ahead of your surgery.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
Like for me, when they went in, it was so bad.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Like I think if they had gone in maybe three
years prior, like it wouldn't maybe have spread to my lung,
Like maybe I wouldn't have had so many adhesions.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Yeah, right, which, like that's another layer to it, I'm
sure is like the fact that it takes so long
means that it ends up being so much more severe
in the women when it does get detected. Yeah, exactly,
it's so frustrating. Okay, so yeah you get on the show.
We lost track, but I'm glad we're talking about this.
(14:49):
Obviously it was a big part of your one on
one day, which we will touch on as well in
this podcast and just talk more about you know, what
it was like opening up to Joey about do you
refer to it as a condition in what how do
you do it?
Speaker 4 (15:02):
I always say, yeah, a condition disease. I think for
me it's just something I deal with every day. But yeah,
I opened up to him about my condition and how
it impacts me.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yeah, okay, gotcha. Okay, Well let's do I want?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah, you step out of the limo, How you feeling,
What are your thoughts? What do you think about Joey
is your type?
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (15:27):
I was so nervous obviously that whole day leading up
to it, But when I stepped at the limo, I
felt I know, it sounds so cheesy, but like I
did feel immediately at ease because he has such a
chill personality and like demeanor that as soon as I
walked up to him, I kind of felt like I
know about this guy, like this is our first date
kind of I don't know, just felt very like an
(15:49):
initial intro, not like oh I'm on the Bachelor, and
there's all these cameras and lights, like it was really
just the two of us in that moment.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Very special. He was so kind. But then I walked
in the house and I realized I was the first one,
and so like that was a.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
Bit of a shock more than meeting Joey. I was like, oh, okay,
that was I'm glad I knew that after.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, that's so interesting. I always because sometimes they'll show
someone come out of the lemo, but they're not necessarily
the first one that actually came out of the lemo. Yeah,
like the little switch you through. But yeah, but I
feel like that's exciting because you probably like, Okay, I'm
the first girl in his mind tonight, which is kind
of cool. But I also would have been happy to
not know that.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Before saying I'm so glad they didn't tell me before,
because I think I would have been like, I got
to really pull it together, like he's been waiting for
this for months, like I gotta.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
I don't even know. I don't know. It's for the.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Best, for the best. So how does night one go?
I know, it's like the longest night ever, but we
get to talk to him.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
You guys know, it's a long night. I mean I
didn't anticipate it being that long, so it was. It
was a long night. I got really lucky and got
to talk to him. Not everyone did, so I was
fortunate for that. I gave him a ball marker from
the golf course my dad and I play in Hill
and Head, so he seemed excited that I golfed, and yeah,
we had a good talk.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
We kissed, which I was not expecting.
Speaker 4 (17:14):
Like all my friends back at home were like, what
this kind of off brand for me. I'm a little
like stand offish until I trust someone. But I guess
the trust that was already kind of there. I just
felt safe around him. But yeah, night when there was
stuff going on, but I kind of just kept to
myself and was nervous for the roast ceremony. But I
felt good about our talk.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
Nice, feel like that's like all you can ask for
out of night, Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
And then before so before currently you get your one
on one what's your connection? Like are you are you
able to spend any time with Joey? How's it going?
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Yeah? It was going well.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
I got to talk to him at the talent show
a little bit before we went out or excuse me,
the pageant, and I got to talk to him that evening.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So yeah, let's talk about the paget because missus right,
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Yeah that was so Yeah, I did I did, I should. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
There was a little animosity surrounding the kiss.
Speaker 4 (18:15):
How the kiss heard around the world. Yeah, there was
some animosity for sure, which I'm so conflict adverse, Like
I was like, it's fine, like someone else take the crown,
Like all good. I understand, you know, I think some
girls poured their heart and soul. They were doing flips
and cartwheels and singing, and I mean, they're all so talented.
(18:36):
I just stood there, but I was trying to think
of something that I could do to show him I
do come out of my shell and like I am
fun and bubbly. I'm not this like super quiet, serious,
reserved person.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
I think because I was nervous. That's how I had
been coming across. So I was like, let's do it.
Why not? You know, I took a tequila shot before,
but I did it. No.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
I liked it. I liked that your talent incorporated him
into it. I think that's always nice to like get
him involved. And like I said, when we were capping,
and I was like, you know what, sometimes you gotta
work smarter, not harder. Just because she wasn't upside down
doesn't mean she didn't have a good talent.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
Yeah, the other girls did great, so we all it
was fun.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
Did you do you have like a favorite group date
activity like that you've done up until this point?
Speaker 4 (19:26):
Up until this point, I think the wedding was fun
because one, I've just never thought i'd be in a
wedding dress before my wedding day. And then we all
got to have individual time with him to work the room.
At the reception, they didn't show everyone's but that was
like our second time actually talking and it felt comfortable
because it was just the two of us, like walking around,
(19:46):
we went to the bar. So I thought the wedding
was fun, that the pageant was really out of my
comfort zone, and then there was more group dates that
were a little more my speed further through this season.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Nice. Yeah, the pageant, the gimmicky ones are always a
little more awkward.
Speaker 4 (20:01):
Yeah, there's I'm just like, oh my gosh. Yeah, I'm
definitely an awkward person, So like being in that environment
just like an answer.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Yeah, no, it's it's tough.
Speaker 4 (20:12):
But I give those date planners credit because they always
they come together so well. But in the moment, you're
kind of like, all right, we're doing this, but then
you see it and you're like, this is awesome.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
So we get to Malta and you get your one
on one date with Joey, were you like, did you
have a sense that like maybe it was going to
be you that week, like your time was maybe coming
or were you totally surprised.
Speaker 4 (20:38):
Well, there's there's two pieces to this story. So the
first one is my luggage was lost. Upon arriving in Malta,
I was like, look, Joey's amazing. I want to be
on a date this week. Just whatever you do, do
not put me on a date tomorrow. Like I don't
have any of my stuff. I was the only girl.
It's just very like of course, uh and so's it
was funny when they called my name. I was like,
(21:00):
you know, I was really excited, and they ended up
finding my luggage, so it all worked out. But it
was just like I wasn't really prepared for at the
night before because of that conversation. So like I didn't like,
I didn't self tan, I didn't take a shower, like
little things that I would do if I knew I
was having gome on on one.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
But as soon as.
Speaker 4 (21:17):
I like got there with Joey, I was like, this
is I mean, it was the best day ever.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Yeah, no, it looks that's actually funny. On on my season,
Michelle Young, they she lost a piece of luggage and
like was never to be found, like it wasn't. It
wasn't the show, like the airline lost her luggage and
she never found it, and she was like borrowing her
roommate Ryan's clothes like the whole season because I think
like the one that she lost was like all her
(21:44):
clothes and jewelry, and like the one that she had
was like toilet trees and like shoes and stuff. So
she's like, I'm screwed, but I'm very glad that they
found your luggage. But that is funny because it's like
the one time you're like I don't want to date
tomorrow is the time that you're like, okay, I guess
on the dates.
Speaker 4 (22:01):
Just how life works out and on you know. It
was it was truly like I will remember that day
for the rest of my life. It was so fun,
Like I got to do the walking tour and I
travel a lot, so like getting to actually like walk
around the city and see Malta. It was it was
just casual and fun, like it didn't feel like we
were on a bachelor date.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Yeah. I always say like those are the best dates,
like just the ones that are the most organic. What
was it like being in that church? I know, you
kind of talked about your grandfather, Yeah, and you got
to interact with Yeah.
Speaker 3 (22:35):
So it was emotional. It was really emotional.
Speaker 4 (22:38):
It was I think being away from you, you know this,
like being away from your whole family, and then like
just your emotions are high and then you know, I
was in the church and I went to church with
my grandfather growing up, and he had passed away recently,
and because of COVID, I wasn't able to go to
the funeral, and just there was so many emotions that
just hit me at once. I felt like I hadn't
been in a church like that since I was with him,
(22:59):
And it was just a really full circle moment because
he always said he wanted to meet my person, and
like we both golfed together, like we were just so close,
and like that was at the end of the day
and so like that being kind of how we closed
out the date and just everything going so well with Joey,
I just felt like I was really supposed to be
there in that moment.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Uh. It was. Yeah, it was very special.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
And then the priest came over and talked to us
about what makes a healthy marriage and talked about a
couple that he's married in the church and yeah, he
just gave us some advice and it was Yeah, it
was it was beautiful.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
I'm excited to watch that back.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Yeah, are you starting to feel like Joey could be
your person? Is that happening yet?
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Yeah? For sure, I think.
Speaker 4 (23:43):
I mean I was definitely starting to think like, oh, okay,
this is like I'm not just on here, you know,
to meet someone and see if there's something there. Like
I'm like, the something there is there. It's just a
matter of like kind of getting down, like opening up
with a big thing for me that night, Like I
wanted to open up about my health with him because
(24:05):
I wanted to make sure like that wasn't something that
you know, he wouldn't want to that could affect his
decision with me. So at that point, I was like,
the feelings are there. I just think we need to
kind of figure out under the covers, like our values,
what we want long term in our timelines. Timelines was
a huge thing for me.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
Yeah we we we see you mentioned and we definitely
don't have to go there if you're uncomfortable talking about it.
But your past with your acts of it being an
issue for him, do you want to talk about that
at all.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
Yeah, I can touch on it.
Speaker 4 (24:38):
I think, you know, for him, my health did was
ultimately something that impacted the end of our relationship. I
think he saw it as I would never say a burden,
but you know, just something that would potentially affect you know,
us being able to have a family long term or
you know, my ability to be a mother, like I'm
(24:59):
not always is one hundred percent every day, And so
for him, he saw that as sometimes a challenge, which
you can imagine on my side, like is really difficult
because you know, when we broke up, like hearing from
multiple people that it was like he just wasn't sure
he could handle your health condition, He wasn't sure that
he could support you in the way that you need
(25:19):
to be supported. And for me it was very much like,
but I mean, I do a really good job at
like holding my pain in and not showing it outwardly.
So I'm already self conscious about this, and to hear
it was like one of the deciding factors to ultimately
not move towards a marriage with me, like has made
me not want to open up about any of this
(25:40):
with another person.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
Yeah, I can imagine that being on TV opening up
to Joey this new relationship about your endo is already scary,
and then to have that added layer of like, well,
the last time I did this, it ended the relationship. Yeah,
is just a whole other life of like anxiety exactly.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
I mean, you said it perfectly, but I felt I
had to because on the show, you have such limited time,
and so I wanted to be fair to Joey. And
if it's Joey was never going to go in and
say like I don't want to be with you because
you can't have kids. That's not the That's not the
conversation that we were having. It was more like, hey,
I'm dealing with x Y and Z. I might be
(26:23):
on a little bit more of an expedited timeline than
some of these other girls that are here because of
x Y and Z. Like how does that make you feel?
And I genuinely wanted his reaction because it's okay if
he wants, you know, five to seven years before kids.
And I'm not saying that's what he said, but like
his emotions and reaction are valid, and I would rather
(26:43):
have that early on than like drag out a connection
and then it come up later that to me wouldn't
be fair to him totally.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
That totally makes sense because if he were to say,
like I'm not ready to have kids, I don't want
a family for ten years, or like I don't I mean,
we know he wants kids, but like, it's a serious
conversation to have and it's one that you know you
have added layers to add to. So how did that
conversation go? Like, obviously you did an amazing job of
expressing yourself, he saw. How did it feel, you know,
(27:13):
hearing Joe's response.
Speaker 4 (27:15):
Hearing Joe's response was well, like probably forever changed my
perception on opening up about this in my life and
my story and my health and relationships. He I mean,
he brought me to tears that night. It was he
was so genuine and sincere and such a good listener.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
I felt heard. I didn't feel judged or like analyzed.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
I felt like he was really just listening to me
and empathetic to what I went through. He related to
me in many ways in his own personal life, and
he was like, look, that's not an issue for me.
Like I think with the right person, whoever that is
for him, that they would figure it out. And you
know that could be through things like adopt or you know,
(28:01):
surrogacy whatever. That looks like kids are important to him
as well, but that's not going to be detrimental to
his choice and moving.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
Forward with me. And yeah, he was just he was
so kind that night and it was it was really beautiful.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
That's amazing. Yeah, I feel like he's really demonstrated.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
Like we said, he's the he's the best receiver joke.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
He's like, he's an amazing receiver.
Speaker 4 (28:25):
He he's an incredible he's also he's such a good
listener and he's yeah, he's he's he was raised well
like he is, but you know what it is, he's
just a kind person. So he actually cares because you'll
talk to some people and it's like you can tell
they're registering it, but like kind of fifty percent and
fifty percent out, Like he was locked in. I mean,
he was listening to me. And in a situation like that,
(28:47):
it's so important.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Okay, so let's let's jump a little bit too. Yeah,
your thoughts on the Maria fiasco and why we want
I want your opinion on two situations, but the first one,
what were your thoughts on just the Maria in Sydney
of it all.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
Yeah, because we also know that you were the only
one there before they went on to them, because everyone
else is on the group day.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
I forgot.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
Yeah, I guess, yeah, I can start.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
My initial thoughts were back at the mansion is where
I think that conversation should have been left. I think,
you know, everyone's emotions and feelings are valid, Medina's were valid.
At the mansion, Sidney was trying to stand up for
her friend, and Maria was trying to, you know, advocate
for herself and say, hey, I did not bring this
up in any way, shape or form to hurt someone.
(29:40):
I brought this up just because I wanted to know
who was talking and kind of you know, clear her
name in the situation, because she didn't mean her come
in a mean way. There was no bad intentions there.
It's hard. I really think this dragged on for too long.
It took away time from a lot of girls that
had also their own beautiful stories to tell, and so
(30:01):
I wish it was left at the mansion.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
I think it.
Speaker 4 (30:04):
I think the initial conversation could have just been squashed,
but it continued on, obviously right to Malta in Spain
and and throughout the season and that day that it
was just the three of us, Like you could cut
the tension with a knife. I mean you could just tell,
like tensions are high, they're going on a two on one.
They're fully aware of what that comes with, right, Like
(30:26):
I think the date card that I got, of course
me had to read it was like one rows, two girls,
one stay as one goes, And I was like, I
was even just like I got to go to my room, like.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
Here's the card, how do we get that down?
Speaker 3 (30:39):
I like toss that out the window at the hotel.
But yeah, it was it was.
Speaker 4 (30:45):
I I did sit down with both of them, both
of their you know, they they were they were stressed.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Who do if you had to put money on it
before they went on that date, who did you think
was coming back?
Speaker 2 (30:56):
That's a good question.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
That is a good question.
Speaker 4 (30:58):
I think based on what I saw, I thought Maria
and Joey had a stronger connection. I was on both
group dates with Maria.
Speaker 3 (31:07):
I was on one group date with Sydney and she
didn't have one the first week, So I just thought
I could always tell there was something there between Joey
and Maria. Like I tell by the way he looked
at her. I think he was intrigued by.
Speaker 4 (31:19):
Her personality, like she is very outgoing, So I kind
of thought, if it was solely based on connection, Maria
was going to come back.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
We saw when Sydney's suitcase gets pulled Leah Jess. I'm
sure there was a few other people, but those were
the two main ones. I remember were very surprised that
Sidney was going home. Where do you think their shot
came from? Do you think it was like wishful thinking
or do you think you know?
Speaker 4 (31:48):
I think it was rooted in the fact that they
have their own perception of this.
Speaker 3 (31:52):
They're very close to Sidney.
Speaker 4 (31:53):
They were you know, when you're on this experience, you
form strong relationships because it's so unique, and they were,
you know, really good friends with her, and they heard
her side of the story, and they weren't as close
to Maria.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
So I think it was twofold.
Speaker 4 (32:08):
I think it was oh, Maria's still staying like they
were upset about that, and then I think it was
also like we're losing our friend here.
Speaker 3 (32:16):
But that night was hard.
Speaker 4 (32:17):
I mean, I'm not gonna lie like I've since had
a conversation with Maria and apologize to her because I
wish I spoke up that night and it's like, you know,
you go through this, everyone has their like regrets. But
when she walked in, it was silent, and I wish
that I had said, like, look, today must have been
hard for both of you, but like, I'm proud of
(32:40):
you forgetting the rose, and like I I know Joey
made that decision for a reason. She didn't deserve to
walk into a silent room, like that wasn't fair to her.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
Yeah, yeah, I can imagine that would have been super horrible.
Speaker 1 (32:53):
Everyone's like yeah, because then you walk in and you
you're kind of on this a little bit of a
high because at least you're still there and he gives
you a rose, and then everybody's.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Like, oh, guys, it was bad. Like it was bad,
but like it was, it was bad. It was bad.
It was quiet. It was because you know, she didn't
do anything wrong.
Speaker 4 (33:10):
She was she's also dating Joey, so he made the
choice and she came back and she didn't deserve to
walk into that.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
So but then we do see Leyah, the Leyah Jess
call calling her Maria bitch and all, well, I was
going to refer to Leah pulled Medina aside and said, like,
you were so nice to her when she came in.
(33:39):
Was that like later in the night then, like do
you think Medina maybe had those same feelings you did?
Of like that was really awkward, Like I'm gonna go
say something to Maria, just basically saying like hey, happy
you're back, you look great, like hope your hope your
day was good.
Speaker 4 (33:53):
Here's the thing, like, yes, she brought up the initial
comment so people could say, like, why is she not
still involved? But her and Maria said so at the
end of the day at that point, she was not
involved anymore. I think that the description or maybe what
was mis confused was like Leah and Sidney were so close,
so I think Leyah was standing up for her friend,
(34:14):
but Medina didn't really do anything wrong, like she were
allowed to be friends with multiple people right across different groups,
Like that's inevitable with thirty two women. So I just
again it was kind of like why are we still
dragging this on in Spain?
Speaker 1 (34:27):
You know, yeah, totally, who are your friends in the house.
Speaker 4 (34:31):
I was really good friends with Kelsey A. She's an
amazing human. I think Madina's great Maria, the sisters, Evelyn, Chrisa.
I mean, I could go on like just Daisy's wonderful,
but you know, I think obviously you gravitate to certain people,
and like Kelsey A, Caitlin, Medina and I were definitely
the closest.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
Nice I do want to jump back to what you
were asking, which was which was what is your take
on the blow up between Jess and Maria.
Speaker 4 (35:05):
It was crazy to watch, and I think there was
a lot of built up emotion. You know, everyone gets that,
like it's a pent up anger that's like week after
week after week. And like in Malta, Sinney went home
and Jess and Sidney were such good friends, are such
good friends, and you know, I think Jess and Maria
like you can go back to kind of night one,
(35:25):
right when Jess kissed him twice, like there's been like
people kind of poking the bear, and I think in
Spain it finally just erupted and Jets obviously called Maria
a name, and you know, I don't think that was
warranted at all, and I do think that they've they
had the opportunity to talk that night, but it was
(35:47):
it was crazy, It was very explosive.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Yeah, I would say I feel like as much as
there was a lot of Sydney Maria confrontation, that was
like the most heated moment I've seen, Like there was
a lot of emotion behind that one. We do see
you like console Maria when she's kind of trying, yeah,
to leave with the Leyah drama. You just say, you know,
it's okay. You've been like pushed and pushed and pushed,
so like it's okay that you're having a moment. And
(36:10):
then we see you make a comment in regards to
the Jess and Maria argument where you say, you know,
I think there might be some jealousy on Jess's side.
Do you think that Maria now getting this attention and
reassurance from Joey kind of rubbed some people the wrong way,
especially maybe the girls that were friends with Sidney.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (36:29):
Look, I mean, I'm thirty, I'm confident in who I am.
If I was on this twenty four, i'd be jealous
of Maria too, Like she's so confident, she's stunning, Like
she's seemingly good at everything. The girls like doing like
you know, backflips across the stage, like she's hilarious. I mean, right,
it's intimidating to be in a room with someone like that.
I'm not I don't know if if it was jealousy
(36:50):
with Jess or if it was more just like the
personal uh feeling like personally attacked as her best friend
went home because of an output of Maria's action. But
I do think, yeah, I think that some of the
younger girls in the house, which I hate to say
that because this whole season feels like it's been about age,
but like, I think someone at twenty four and someone
at thirty one are in a different phase of life,
(37:13):
and I think sometimes there might have been some jealousy
there just seeing how strong of a connection Marian and
Joey had.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Was it at least entertaining? I mean, because you guys
don't have anything to do.
Speaker 3 (37:27):
You guys, I was just eating charcuterie and having sangria,
which was.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Great and as you should in Spain, sounds.
Speaker 3 (37:35):
Terrible, but yeah, I was. I was. I wasn't like
entertained by people feeling sad, but I was like, it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
Yeah, no, I get it out of the two places
so far that you traveled to. Which one do you favor? Spain?
Speaker 3 (37:53):
Well, I love, I love Spain. I took Spanish all
through college and like, I love the culture. But if
I'm thinking about just like the experience there Malta.
Speaker 4 (38:01):
Because of the date, the one on one, I got
to see so much of Malta. When Jesse told us Malta,
I don't I don't know if it was dumb or like,
I just didn't know where that was.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
I was just going to ask you that because like
I feel like no one has even heard of it.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
I was like, is it a country? Is it a city?
Like where is it located?
Speaker 3 (38:19):
I was like, are we going to Asia? Like I
didn't know?
Speaker 4 (38:22):
And so I he said international and like I hate flying.
It was the whole thing I was taking in a
lot in that moment. But the fifteen hours to Turkey
was like I thought we were going to Nashville.
Speaker 3 (38:32):
The rumor in the house was we were going to Nashville.
So like I really had to like shift my mind, like,
oh no, We're going to Turkey. Like anyways, I loved Malta.
It's beautiful.
Speaker 4 (38:42):
It's right below the boot in Sicily, and I feel like,
I mean, it was a dream.
Speaker 3 (38:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Yeah, I saw when Maria when they were on there too,
and when Maria was like, we're only a thirty minute
boat ride from Sicily, I'm like, oh that's kind of cool.
Like yeah, it's like maybe we'll go to Sicily and
then we'll go to Malta.
Speaker 3 (38:57):
Yeah, you guys should go.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
Okay, we are going to get into a game with
you before we let you go. It's super it's rapid fire.
It's just like all easy, fun questions about you and yeah,
you ready, I guess, let's do it. Okay. What is
your go to breakfast?
Speaker 4 (39:16):
Go to breakfast is probably an Osi you bowl. I
love them. I like make one every morning.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
You make it at home?
Speaker 3 (39:22):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 4 (39:23):
I used to buy them, but they're like twenty dollars eat,
so I was like, this is not fiscally responsible. So
I get the little package and whole foods and like
you know, like for the granola and some fruit.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
Oh my gosh. So yeah, what is your favorite color
to wear?
Speaker 3 (39:37):
Green?
Speaker 2 (39:38):
Which I mean perfect do green eyes?
Speaker 3 (39:41):
They're like green blue. I don't know, it changed, it
kind of changed with my emotions. Sometimes people would say
that like if I cry, they get more green and
then if I'm so interesting.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
Oh my gosh, it's like a Disney character. What's your
favorite season?
Speaker 4 (39:56):
My favorite season, I mean typical answer, but fall. Love
the fall and everything that comes with it. Halloween is
my favorite holiday.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
Halloween to be your holiday.
Speaker 3 (40:06):
I love Halloween. I know that's so retroversial. It is rare.
Speaker 4 (40:10):
I just I love like spooky things. And I know
it's like leading up to Thanksgiving.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
I don't know, I love is that weird? I just
feel like, yeah, I.
Speaker 1 (40:21):
Just don't like dressing I just don't like dressing up.
But I love the idea, you know.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
Spooky season. Yeah, I love like we'll get like fall candles.
Speaker 4 (40:28):
Like yeah, like passing out candy, like you know, Christmas
is on its way. Yeah, it's a good time.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
What is a big green flag for you?
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Good relationship with their family?
Speaker 2 (40:40):
What a relationship deal breaker for you?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
A relationship deal breaker would be someone who.
Speaker 4 (40:50):
Cheats, for sure, or someone who's not driven in their
career or I shouldn't even say their career, but like
not passionate about what they're doing in their life.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
What's your dream vacation destination.
Speaker 3 (41:02):
I want to go to Japan so badly.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
We are saying maybe this we might go Joe's bend.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
Ben It's amazing, Is it amazing? Yeah, we want to
try to go this year.
Speaker 3 (41:13):
You guys have to tish.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
We'll see, we'll see if it happens. I'm hoping it,
cross my fingers. What's one thing on your bucket list?
Speaker 4 (41:24):
I think on the bucket list would be I really
want to run like a marathon or a triathlon, just
because when I was originally diagnosed with like all my
health stuff, they were like, you probably won't be able
to do like extreme sports or anything that's really hard
on your body anymore, which like growing up playing sports
that was devastating for me to hear.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
And I kind of want to prove my doctor's wrong and.
Speaker 4 (41:44):
Be like, even though I like because it's a long
time and heard on your body, so they're worried it
might like exasperate my symptoms or make me feel like
a lot worse with my back. So I kind of
want to like run one and then give my doctor,
like my like bib to put in their off.
Speaker 1 (41:58):
Yeah, you should do it the city if you if
you could run it anywhere, were would you want to run?
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Probably New York?
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Joe did the New York Marathon this past night.
Speaker 1 (42:07):
Yeah, it was it's they say it's they it's I
didn't know that. They say New York's one of the
harder courses. Yeah, but yeah, it was very rewarding. I
did on the right under four hours, so it was
three three fifty eight, three fifty eight.
Speaker 2 (42:23):
Yeah, and I did not run it.
Speaker 3 (42:25):
I didn't.
Speaker 2 (42:27):
No, I told one of the signs I did. I
had a sign that said run joe Run, I love it.
What is Oh? Do you have any tattoos?
Speaker 3 (42:36):
I do not, but I'm not a post to them.
I just haven't found the right thing. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
What's your favorite physical quality of Joey's physical quality?
Speaker 3 (42:46):
His eyes?
Speaker 4 (42:47):
I feel like everyone probably says that, but not even
just since the color, like they're very kind.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
Yeah, what is your or who is your go to
when you need advice?
Speaker 4 (42:57):
My best friend again we she was my first friend
and when I reached the United States and she's more
like a sister.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
What is your favorite beauty product? At the moment, I know,
I'm struggling to read them, like, wait, what is this?
Speaker 4 (43:11):
So I know the answer to this one the Elf
lip oil because on the show, all the girls use
the dr one, but it's so expensive and I just
can't justify that. So the Elf one's like nine dollars
and it's amazing.
Speaker 2 (43:23):
Oh my god, that's a good due.
Speaker 3 (43:24):
To do, not to do a product placement.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
No, let me.
Speaker 1 (43:27):
See, I love Elf is blown up because of that.
Speaker 2 (43:32):
Yes, because the Oil Good Job Joe podcast we're just
talking about the other day of Clarence has a good
a good dupe for it as well. What is your
favorite memory of your time on the show.
Speaker 3 (43:47):
My favorite memory is would be the dinner with Joey.
Speaker 4 (43:50):
It was one just like an incredibly beautiful setting and
then it was something like it was something I didn't
even know its possible to have in a relationship, like
his reaction really changing how I view dating and myself.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
That's amazing. And then to end it off, can you
give us a teaser for what's to come this season?
Speaker 4 (44:10):
I think what's to come this season? I think, you know,
obviously it's a very romantic season. I think Joey has
an incredible cast of women, so there's going to be
stronger relationships starting to form, and I think with that
comes heightened emotions.
Speaker 3 (44:24):
Obviously some drama.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
You know, that's continuing from previous episodes, but I really
think the rest of the season is just going to
focus on the love stories. And yeah, I'm just hopeful
that Joey, he's very deserving to find his person, and
hopeful every hopefully everyone gets to watch that come to life.
Speaker 1 (44:40):
Nice, amazing, LEXI, thank you so much for coming on
beat your Happy Hour.
Speaker 3 (44:45):
Thank you guys for having me.
Speaker 1 (44:46):
Of course, thank you to all our listeners for joining us.
Speaker 2 (44:50):
And of course a big thank you to our listeners.
Make sure to subscribe, but we have new episodes of
Happy Hour every single week, with exclusive interviews and episode
recaps all season long. Thanks for listening.
Speaker 1 (45:02):
Bye bye
Speaker 3 (45:06):
Mm hmm.
Hosts And Creators
Joe Amabile
Susan Noles
Serena Pitt
Kathy Swarts
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show. Clay Travis and Buck Sexton tackle the biggest stories in news, politics and current events with intelligence and humor. From the border crisis, to the madness of cancel culture and far-left missteps, Clay and Buck guide listeners through the latest headlines and hot topics with fun and entertaining conversations and opinions.