September 24, 2025 • 45 mins
Only Terry could save two lives in only a couple days- wait until you hear about his latest heroic encounter!
And from heroes to lots of zeros, the Dubrow’s dish on the multi-million-dollar dent in their bank account! Find out why they say losing millions turned out to be a good thing.
Plus, Heather carries the pocketbooks, but who is pulling the purse strings?
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
I'm Heather Dubrow and I'm Terry Durou, and we're going
to keep this between us, not really. So there's a
lot of stuff we want to talk about today kind
of based off of what was on Real Housewives last week.
But before we do that, you are not going to
do this. Do you all remember last week the choking story?
(00:26):
Do you all remember the choking story of mister shows unbelievable? Okay,
no one picked up the bill. Let me just refresh you.
No one Victor with the bill at a YadA.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Saved a life, mister joos, no Victor bill, no dessert, nothing, nothing.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Five days later, I was meeting up with this gal,
high level executive producer gal, and Terry knows her as well, and.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I was like, listen, I'm gonna go meet with her.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
We're gonna go to this place rooftop whatever, and we're
gonna hang out.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
I go, why don't you join us later?
Speaker 1 (00:56):
Like, give us like an hour and a half so
we can have a girl time and all that kind
of thing.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Then you come meet us.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
So Terry comes and meets us, walks in and maybe
what twenty minutes later, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (01:09):
She was talking and eating and talking and eating, and
all of a sudden she choked. She choked, like the
full blown thing.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
We are sitting like in a round booth, right and
she's in between us and Terry and I just she
was choking. We both looked at her and we're like,
I think we had it unspoken. Oh, she's choking. Terry
turned her so her back was to him. He's heimlicking
her while I have my napkin under her mouth talking
(01:40):
to her, and I'm like, you're fine, it's all okay.
Terry's got you, and you're talking to from behind her.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yeah, And I think I gave her the same warning
I gave the other person. And mister Chaws, this hurt,
but don't worry. It's gonna be fine. Except I did
it like three times harder than I did it mister Choles,
because mister Chills had to do it four times.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
This was what three?
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Oh I thought I did one. That was two h two.
I think to livet more weights. So yeah, I did it,
and she was fully like.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Fully, it was like a full choking situation. We're in
the corner of this restaurant, this rooftop. No one else
is there upstairs, and then the poor thing so get
really embarrassed when they choke. What is the thing about
choking and embarrassment.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
Well, because it's like, you know, hey, I might have
died from you in front of you, and I just
created an emergency. It's embarrassing. Cried a little bit sweet,
but yeah, and it was unbelievable because I mean, I've
been on doctor for a long time and I've heimlickd
(02:54):
a few people in my life. But twice in.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Five days is that crazy. I had to heimlick my grandmother.
I was in high school. We were alone in the house.
She was choking, and I had to heimlick her. Got
an airway and she was like, you know, like I
had like a bit of a chubby, you know, kind
of mid section.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
She was cute.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
She was so cute, my grandma.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
But so, you know, hard to know where the we
do it, and you know, and I'm a lay person
and you know, seventeen or something. Yeah, heim licked her.
And then I remember I called my aunt because I
think my mom was out of town.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I called my aunt.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I said, come get your mother up the buck because
I didn't want to be alone with her.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
I was so nervous.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Well, it's so scary you think about it. I mean,
if it doesn't work.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
They're dead. And some of us don't know how to
do a criake.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Well who does Nobody doesn't you? Yeah, I don't think
anybody should ever try that unless you have some training.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Yeah. I wouldn't. I wouldn't try slitting the throat's open.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Yeah. And so I realized that I've done the Heimlick
maneuver more than doctor Heimlichez if you think about it.
But it was weird. And then as we were coming
out of.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Mister Chows and we had the choker at this rooftop.
And then we were at a party at Mister Chows
for our friend Candy the other night and we were
coming out.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
And TMZ came up to us and said, so, Terry,
we heard that you had there was somebody choking Mister
Chows five days ago. And you know, it's funny. I've
seen variations of the report on TMZ. I saw the
one they edited and put on TMS Live, and then
I've seen like the long slow one that they have
(04:42):
on their website where I walk out and they interview
us and I go through the whole story, and I go, yeah, yeah,
because the one that they put on TMZ Live that
they edited was just kind of fun right because it
was edited. Because it was edited, and so that I
came out, I said, but here's the thing. You know,
they didn't even pay for my meal or off for
(05:04):
a dessert. And then I said, but don't tell mister Chow.
And then at first I thought, oh my god, this
is so bad. Mister Chows is never going to serve
me again. I really was actually worried about that, but
then I was so complimentary to mister Chows. But who knows,
although it's TMZ, who doesn't see.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
Team Yeah, we go there all the time.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Yeah, but it was weird.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
To two times in five days. Now, I don't know
if you're good luck.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Or bad luck.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
It's funny.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
I was ready, do we want to eat with you
because you save? Or do we not want to eat
with you because you're a bad luck because someone chokes?
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Well, what's weird is we were at a wedding this
weekend and I was at the gym during the day
and the girl next to me was running on the treadmill,
bell on the treadmill right next to me and was
holding on for dear life. She's getting slammed by the
belt and she's like, I look over and it's like
(05:59):
an emergence. See situation, maybe not as bad as the
Heimlich And I reach over and I I hit stop
on the thing and she let go and it stopped.
And I thought, that's three. Three. Some neighbor were done
three emergency. Three emergencies. Was funny because I was somewhere
last night and something broke or something. I don't know.
(06:21):
It was a restaurant, but there was a very loud
noise and I thought, really, is this going to be four? Amazing? Nah?
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Things coming threes? Yeah, funny.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
So that's over with.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
So if you see Terry in a restaurant, I don't know,
be careful. Chew your food. Yeah, the PSA is chew
your food.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
You know, it's funny. I was reading the study last
night and when you know, you know what you're supposed
to do CPR and people yep, seventy three percent of
the time that you do CPR and you get them
back have very significant brain damage. Yes, so yes, what's
(07:00):
the moral of the CPR The hell out of them
as early as you possibly can to keep the brain
the blood flow of their brain. But I imagine think
about that. That's CPR. I mean, you have like two
two and a half minutes to go without oxygen your
brain and it's over.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
This is exciting.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Yeah, let me move on to the mundane. I have
a ZiT right under my nose that I could not
attack yet because I was putting my makeup on. And
the reason I'm bringing up is something in my algorithm.
And I asked our daughter Max to and she's the
same thing is telling me that you cannot pop a
ZiT anywhere in the triangle around your nose because it's
(07:39):
going to go to your brain and you're going to die.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
True or false? Yeah that's false. It sounds good, but
it's get this.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Have you seen this, Yeah, I've heard of called the
golden triangle or something you're not about.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
You're supposed to not popposite.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
That's anywhere like round your nose and the nasal labial
fold like anywhere here.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
So the theory being that it gets into the veins
in that area, which tracks back to like the retinal
artery and vein or into it's not that far from
the blood brain barrier. They can get right to the
brain and the cause of meningiz or brain infection. It's
I mean, I'm sure an infection on the face has
(08:19):
done that before. But and could you find an article
about somebody who popped the ZiT or claim the pop
is it or it is probably more of an abscess
and it happened, sure, But the larger concern is if
you have filler injected in that area. Oh and yeah,
you know, like the hyaluronic acids or the sculptures, and
(08:40):
if you get into an artery or a vein in
that area, it can do one of two things which
are very very bad. And it's on the consent form
and it's a non complication sculpture too, yeah, for all
any of it. And it's a non complication that happens
even if the doctor does it right, because you know
he doesn't have eyes in the tip of his needles.
(09:01):
It can get back into a major blood vessel that
supplies that part of the skin of the face and
the whole area, like for example, the cheek tip of
your nose can die through lack of circulation.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
So you'd have to have it injected there. Like if
it's a site you don't have injected you're fine.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
You're fine, but that can happen.
Speaker 3 (09:20):
Care about myself right now.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
That can happen from any filler, and it does happen,
and then there's an algorithm we go through that we
see it starting to happen. You're supposed to do all
these reversals life. What you put on nitro paste, open
up the blood vessels. You immediately start injected hyaluronidase to
dissolve the hyaluronic acid. You're supposed to put on these
other kinds of creams and so on, so that can
(09:44):
get into the blood supply of the skin and on botch.
We had several patients that happened too that we had
to fix. Or even worse, it can get into the
infra orbital artery in vein right here, and then you
go blind and then it goes back to your retinal
in vain and causes blindness and by the way, very depressing.
As an expert medical legal excerpt, I've seen this a
(10:06):
dozen times. So that's theoretically what can happen with a
z it that you pop, but in reality that doesn't
really happen. But it does happen with fillers, So be careful.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
You can't poposit where you have filler.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I think you can popposite where you have filler, but
you probably shouldn't have filler where you have filler.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
In other words, it's really did anyone understand that?
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Yeah? Meaning you can popposit where you have filler, because
I don't think it happens. But those areas that you're
concerned about popping a z it causing a brain infection
actually can cause it a problem with filler in those areas.
So it's true for a filler, not true for a.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Pimple, Okay, And that's easier to fix.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Yeah, kind I feel much. By the way, this is
a little bit of a callback to last week. I
do have some more information that I have looked up
and gleaned, and now I can add to my areas
of expertise. I have more detailed information about ozembic vulva.
In case you're interested, Are we interestedly?
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Right?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
I thought you would be, because I thought your action
last week was very funny. By the way, it's very cute.
Ozembic vulva is not necessarily due to just the rapid
weight loss. It's a phenomenon referred to as tryness down
there lack of lubrication and irritation because you've lost so
much body fat as a woman, and body fat particularly postmenopausal,
(11:33):
pre menopausal. Most of your estrogen comes from your ovaries. Post menopausal,
you know your ovaries are not working. So where does
your estron come from? We take it it comes from
your fat cells, so that if you lose a lot
of weight very rapidly, your fat cells make a lot
less estrogen, and that's what's causing this irritation and dryness
(11:57):
down there that they're referring to as ov zempiic vultle.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
But that's an internal thing.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Yeah, so zemb volva is not necessarily just like floppiness cosmetic.
That's yeah, No it's not. It's it's more really referring
to sort of the functional dryness, lack of lubrication, and
irritation that happens related to lack of.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Estrogen from being a woman. Just sucks. Yeah, it's still
much crap.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
It's funny because as I'm reading this article, that's why
I get boobs when I get fatter. It's not because estrogen.
It's yeah, it's not just because I get more fat
in my breast area. It's because I'm heavier, therefore my
fat cells are making more estrogen. Therefore my ducks, my
(12:47):
breast glands are getting bigger. No, right now, I'm sort
of a middle obesity level. I don't think I have
that much kind of capacity, although I would were black
and I had to wear a white shirt for something
we did recently. What was I the Backstreet Boys? Right,
(13:07):
And so we went and got a white T shirt.
I went and yet, Nope, boobs not gonna don't want
to see that.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
I did wear it, though you looked good.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Yeah, thank you, but I was covering the boobs with something.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Okay, Yeah, all right, So I actually.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
Learned a little bit from the whole zembic volva thing.
I just want to say, I'm glad I done a
very interesting.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
It is interesting. That's not one of my issues. I
have others.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Okay, So we've been wanting to talk about. We get
a lot of questions, but all kinds of things. We
get asked about our relationship, we get asked about our kids,
we'd asked about our homes, but we get asked about
how we deal with finances as a couple. And we
have been very transparent over the years about things that
(14:01):
have happened to us. We've talked here on this show
about you know, house fails that we've had and lost money.
We've talked in the past about being scammed out of
a couple of million dollars, which will give you a
little refresher if you haven't heard that story. But it
really has changed the way we've done our finances over
the years. Now.
Speaker 3 (14:19):
If you were watching Real Housewives of.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Orange County last week, we were sitting with Emily and Gretchen.
I had like a little sleepover party, and we were
talking to Gretchen about her finances with Slate. Oh yeah,
and it was you know, it was interesting first of all,
just to hear, you know, what Gretchen's take on finances
(14:43):
and that she doesn't want to be beholden to a man.
And I thought all of that was super smart, very interesting.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
But there were other.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Things we all went huh, like, you know, there's like
a little bit of everything.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
Anyway, go watch the Episode's kind of interesting.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
But it got Terry and I to take you know,
because Gretchen said, boy, this is such a weird these
are weird questions and I was like, not really, And
so the family that I grew up in did not
talk about finances at all, and that was to their
detriment in many cases. When Terry and I first got together,
(15:18):
there were things that I assumed he was handling that
I didn't think of, and I had my head buried
in the sand, even though I'm a smart person.
Speaker 3 (15:25):
I had my own financial.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Success on my own before because we got together, you
know a little bit later, and.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
You had a big Hollywood business manager when I first
met you, right.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
So we were both handled. But then you know, as
you're together and you start commingling, and as we had
kids and all of that, I just thought the whole
thing was super interesting. Where do we want to begin
with finances?
Speaker 2 (15:51):
Well, I mean, I think I grew up in an
environment where not only did you not talk about finances,
there were nothing there was. You basically didn't have money.
You spent what you made, right, and that's it. That's
how you live. You didn't focus on saving, and in
your situation, your family made money, but they didn't talk
(16:14):
about it. And then I remember meeting your father and
other members of your family, and I talked, I come
from the generation of CNBC where we talk a lot about.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
It, which is so good, because the whole point is
if you share information with each other, you all learn,
you all prosper. But I came from such a nineteen
fifties family where no one talked about anything, and everyone.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
Was swept under the rug, and no one talked about money,
and it was a thing that it.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Took me a long time to reprogram myself to terry talking.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
About it with people.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Yeah, so I remember I would talk about it and
they wouldn't say anything. And then I realized, oh, is
this like they didn't stay totally day class, say, totally inappropriate,
totally the like, you shouldn't be talking about this stuff.
This is almost like low class or something that I'm
(17:11):
talking about it. So they never wanted to talk about it.
And then I realized that occasionally, over the years, and
this is the let the take home lesson to the
talking about it, I would have sort of a semi
financial conversation with some members of your family and they
knew nothing about it, nothing, and they didn't have even
(17:31):
a working appreciation for money.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
Which is so weird because my dad was a.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Brilliant, brilliant, smartest guy in the family by far.
Speaker 3 (17:40):
Brilliant guy.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
But yeah, just was not and could probably tell you
every stock, every everything, probably knew all that, yes, but
that was not his thing.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
No clue, no. And so the starting message here is
that you need to talk about it because it's the
only way you're going to learn about it. And it's
it's not very difficult. But there are a few basic
fundamental principles that if you learn them early on and
you use them, you will be successfully and wild You'll
(18:15):
be amazingly and wildly successful and stable in the later
parts of your life, even if you made very little
money your whole life.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Let me just take them back a little bit, because
I want people to understand, since we questioned Gretchen, I
want to explain like sort of how we started.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
So, like Terry said, I was an actress.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
I made a lot of money. I had a Hollywood
business manager. Terry was a plastic surgeon already when we met.
And as we started commingling, you know, we got a
bank account together, I think was the first thing, right, Yeah,
And then eventually we merged our everything, even our investment stuff, even.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Our stock, our stock, a separate stock count, separate stock account,
screw it.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
We put it all together.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
But our a big shift for us, and this was
a I mean a big shift for us. We were
percolating along and doing our thing and making a lot
of money and whatever we were doing, investing whatever.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
So we had someone in.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Our life a CPA who we thought was a guy
who thought was a CPA that was vetted from very
high level people. So we didn't vet him because we thought, oh,
they're with these people, so they are good. And he
had said to Terry after we had one particular liquidity event,
he said, oh, you know, you're now part of my
guys and they all get these opportunities to and they
(19:42):
make all this money.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
It was a criminal enterprise. Basically we didn't know it.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
We also didn't know that the guy wasn't a CPA.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
He was a tax prep guy, not a CPA. So
he got Terry involved in this deal scam and it
was about renting.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
Oh for the World Cup. She was renting this. She
was a complete criminal.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Criminal renting out these apartments that were then going to
be leased out for the World Cup and make all
this money at Papapa.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Took our money and spent it. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
Yeah, so Terry.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
And this and the tax guy said, I'll personally guarantee it.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
Of course, I said, so on my attorney, and so
the attorney.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Yeah, and so I said, okay, that she's not paying
it back, I want it from you. And the guy goes, well,
that's great, but I don't have any money.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
So we ended up losing two million dollars and it
was turned out to be a scam, the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
And I remember we.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Talked about it our friends and whatnot, and I remember
people saying, aren't you upset with him?
Speaker 3 (20:43):
And I said, of course not.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
You were shockingly cool about it.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Because of course I was cool about it because our
system of checks and balances failed.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
And that's just the truth.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
You know, why didn't I ask him certain questions there
was a personal guarantee.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
I didn't say, what's the collateral? We failed? It wasn't
Terry that failed. We failed.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
What was good about that was that we sat down
and I said, oh, my gosh, I am my mother,
and I did not realize that I am being my
mother and I have no idea what's going on.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
And I'm assuming you've got this handled and we're not
having these very important conversations, and we need to do that.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
And we completely changed our entire thing.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Yeah, it's like, you know, sometimes something very negative forces
you to change your checks and balances in your systems
so that it turns out to be worth the cost almost.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
One hundred percent. And I'm not saying two million dollars
is not a lot of money. It's a fuck ton
of money. But I do believe that that loss prevented
us from doing something larger and stupid down the road.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Yeah, you really do. Yeah, So I think that one
thing I've never really said is, you know, people assume
we have a certain amount of resources, and they're always
saying they're this, so that we do, and I think
people be surprised we have more than that.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
People.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
Well, I'll tell you why. Because people assume it because
I've made so much money as a plastic surgeon, and
I do TV shows and you do TV shows. It
is not I have made a lot of money as
a plastic surgeon, okay, and you have made a lot
of money doing television shows. And we've made a lot
of money selling houses in real estate. But the reason
(22:38):
we have a massed whatever we have is not because
of them. What we've made is what we've done with
our money, and that is key to this discussion. In
my opinion, if you appreciate that, you know, at least
talk about the eighth wonder of the world. I don't
know if people understand that one of the world is
(23:01):
compounding interest. What we did back then because of what happened,
is we said, Okay, we need a program, we need
a program of regular investments. We regular and frequent, really
really frequent investments. And for example, I started to freak
(23:21):
out a long time ago when we had twins about
I don't want to be in the situation when, even
if we're wealthy, I don't want to be.
Speaker 3 (23:27):
In a situation where we have no money.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
For two twins going to college at eighteen, and then
three years later there's another one going in three years earlier,
there's another one going all of a sudden, we have
three or four at the same time, or all four
in college, grad school, all requiring a boat ton of money,
a ton of money, and we didn't say anything for college.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Let me tell you what we didn't do, which I
absolutely think people need to do. Before you get married,
before you get serious in a relationship, you've got to
have financial conversations.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
What's your credit score? Do you have debt. How do
you view money? What do you think it's.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Important to spend on your Are your parents gonna need
help when they're older? What's your obligation there? These are
things that you must, must, must talk about because those
can kill a marriage. We did not have those conversations.
We've been very lucky. But I will tell you when
(24:31):
this thing happened and we lost all this money and
we sat down and had our own come to Jesus thing,
it was like, all right, we.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
Got a divide and conquer. Who's doing what?
Speaker 1 (24:41):
And I think people would be very surprised to know
that I handle our money.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Yeah, I handle the investments. You handle the money.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
Terry handles the investments. I handle the money, and I
handle the real estate.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Yeah, I'm the saver. Well I mean to say I'm
the savior, you're the spender. What I mean is I'm Yeah,
I'm the one who invests the money. You manage the
money that we make.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
So what's interesting is that the difference between men and women.
I'm just talking about heterosexual couples right now, but the
difference between men and women is typically women are more
conservative than men. So it's a good yin yang. So
I don't care. You know who you are, who your
partner is, whatever. You got to make sure that one
(25:22):
of you is more conservative with money and one of
you is a little bit of a.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
Risk taker with money, because that's.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Exactly the balance you need, because if you're too conservative,
you will miss out. We have friends, I'm not going
to say who this is, but we have friends that
were buying a second home and the wife insisted to
the husband that they paid for it with kash because
she did not want debt. Now I understand not wanting debt.
(25:51):
I had credit card debt when I was younger, first
big TV show. I paid it off. I don't like debt.
It makes me uncomfortable. However, there's certain kinds of debt
that are really good. And so if you if you
don't have someone that's a little bit of a risk taker,
you're going to lose out on making your money work
for you. So in general, and then I'm going to
(26:13):
let you talk about compounding in just in all the
things you want to talk about. But basically, what we
decided to do is that I would handle the day
to day of our money.
Speaker 3 (26:21):
That was the first thing.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Terry handles the investments that means we don't. Of course
we discuss things, but in general that susan charge. Together
we decided about the kids. Yes, so explain what we
did with the kids. So everyone needs to do.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
So, you know, put in a college account, open up
an account as soon as your kid is born. You've
got to go to Every state has this, by the way,
I think absolutely every state has their version of the
California five to twenty nine plan. I think it's called
five twenty seven planned some states, but it's a five
to twenty something.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
Plan right here at ScholarShare.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Yeah, ScholarShare, that's what we call in California. And it's
you have to open it up immediately as soon as
the kid's born. And by the way, put fifty bucks
any month into it. Every other month, okay, every third month,
but always be putting this in. And what it does
is you put after tax money in it, but it
(27:17):
grows tax free, so that when by the time that
eighteen years later and you've had eighteen years of compounding interest.
The eighth wonder of the world, which is like a
snowball rolling down. It's a very small snowball. It gets
bigger and bigger and bigger by the time eighteen years later.
If you put fifty dollars in it every other month,
(27:39):
you have way more than you need for college education.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
And there's calculators on those five twenty nine plans that
you can go in there and be like, Okay, it's
never too late to start. See, this is how old
my kid is, this is how much time I have
into college.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
What do I have to put in? And here's what else.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
I'm going to tell you all those kills plastic toys
that people want to buy your kids for their birthday
and tell your family, hey, instead of that they need
these three things, these are the three toys they're gonna love.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
I'm gonna buy them for them.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
If you would like to invest in my child's future,
you can. You can give to the five twenty nine plan.
And that's what you have people do for their birthdays,
for the holidays, or major graduations of eighth grade, whatever
it is. It is such a great thing to do
because I will tell you that we have three kids
(28:35):
now in college and those are three less things we're
paying for.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
Yeah, and even if they end up not using it,
you can use it for your own educational purposes.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Yes, like say, Terry and I wanted to study birds
in the Galopogo's island. Boom, thank you for not going
to grad school, Nikki. The other thing on the other
side of that spectrum is your parents long term healthcare.
This is very important to look into. Not everyone will
be eligible for this. The price assurance, the price varies
(29:08):
from you know, area to area. But this is something
you absolutely should look into for your parents. We are
in a situation right now with Terry's mom that it
has been very helpful because that kind of care can
get very expensive.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
It's an insurance policy.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
It's an insurance you explain it.
Speaker 2 (29:26):
Yeah, it's a long term care insurance policy. It's very
If your parents are younger, it's really inexpensive.
Speaker 3 (29:33):
Yeah, get on it.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
Yeah, and hopefully you'll never need it. But if everyone
gets old, if they get sick, you know, you don't
want to send them into a nursing home that you
have to pay for that you can't afford. Yeah. Okay,
So that's the other thing. And the other thing is
I don't care how old you are. Oh and by
the way, even if your kid's fifteen, you should open
(29:55):
up a California five to twenty nine. Plan right now,
let the money grow for the next three years, because
look what the stock market's done, and it will continue
to do that over the next fifteen, eighteen, twenty years.
And then the other thing you have to do is,
I don't care if you are unemployed you work intermittently.
(30:15):
You have to open up an account, an investment account
at a investment place firm, and start investing in stocks
that you've heard of.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
That's the whole key to investing. It's got to be
if you understand what they do and you can invest
in them. You can't figure out what they do, don't bother.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
I remember a long time ago, when Heathern and I
first started dating. I had a giant year. This was
even before I was on TV. I had a really
big year. I made a ton of money and I
said to my dad, look how much I gross this year?
Was it the end of the year? And he goes,
how much of that do you have left? What do
(31:06):
you mean, dad? He goes, well, of that, whatever you made,
where is that money? And I go, I don't know.
And he goes, well, how much do you have Do
you have it in an account somewhere? Did you put
it into a house. Did you buy stocks with it?
I go, I don't have any of it left. He goes,
(31:26):
so you spend it all? I go, I spent it all.
He goes, well, first of all, you're gonna now going
to have to borrow money to pay the taxes on that,
and then you had nothing to show for it. So
you basically worked like a maniac, made a fortune relative fortune,
and you have nothing. And I went, whoa, And he
said to me, so his generation was, he said, you've
(31:46):
got to go buy a house. You got to buy
a house, because that'll force you to at least put
money into a house. And then, of course I started
getting interested in stocks, and we started very very very
early everything. And the thing you did you dine every
year is i'd make money and you go, hey, we
have this money, and I go, can I have some
(32:08):
of it? And you go yeah, And you would give
me a chunk of it, whatever it was. And that
was money that I could invest. And that's the reason
we are as successful as we are.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
And our producers have written a bunch of questions here
which I think are great. But they asked, do you
too agree on spending and saving or do you ever clash.
Speaker 2 (32:31):
Financially, well, we don't discuss saving. I do it. I
never tell you about it, except meaning. What I mean
is you give.
Speaker 3 (32:44):
Me money, right, and then you invest it and I invest.
That's what I'm saying. That's spending or saving we agree on.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Once I got successful, I lost all interest in material goods.
Speaker 3 (32:57):
So nice for me.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
Yeah, it's good for you. And you never ask me
if it's okay. If you buy something, you just buy it, right? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (33:07):
So am I?
Speaker 1 (33:07):
So, Heather, are you the type of wife who keeps
her shopping purchases hidden from her husband or vice versa?
Speaker 3 (33:13):
You don't shop?
Speaker 2 (33:14):
So do I think you keep your shopping hidden from me?
I would say, define hidden, but I would say you, yes,
in a way. You buy a bunch of stuff and
you don't show me, and then just it appears on
(33:35):
your wh Why.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Would I show you? That would be stupid.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
But this is the question.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
Yeah, no, but I'm not hiding things. Like here's the thing.
Terry doesn't know what things cost. He doesn't know what
parties cost. He doesn't know what vacations costs.
Speaker 3 (33:47):
He doesn't You.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
Don't, right, would you agree that you have no idea
what a trip costs?
Speaker 2 (33:52):
I would agree that I have no idea how much
you spend on this trips.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
That's true, But I would also so irritated with Terry
when he makes wife jokes like like she spends all
so much money and all that. Because I handle all
the money and trust me, I could rob us blind,
but I do not.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
No, I think we got lucky because you you have
a good sense of you do spend money on things.
Look at the beautiful clothes you wear and the stuff
that you have. But I trust I am right that
you'll keep it with my rane.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
Listen, I spend appropriately, always.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
Have, Yeah, relative to where we are, you always kept
it in range. I never get like a call from
our bookkeeper who says, oh my gosh, you don't have
enough money to pay Louis Chan.
Speaker 3 (34:44):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
No, and then you give me this money and you
and I put it. I never ever told you what
I what stocks I buy with it.
Speaker 3 (34:56):
He tells me after the fact.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I tell you after the fact, except a couple times
you've said, stop buying Fashle, stop buying Tesla, stop buying
it because.
Speaker 3 (35:07):
We have yes, And of course he does it anyway.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
I do it anyway because it and every time you
said to me, you know, thank god I continue to
buy it because I did listen.
Speaker 3 (35:19):
He does what he does well.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
I do what I do well. Do you believe in
giving your kids an allowance? And if so, do you
tie it to chores or just provided as a teaching tool.
I'm gonna tell you where we screwed up. There's no allowance,
there is no chores. We did not do those things. No,
I started with an allowance. I tried once. There was
(35:43):
so many of them, and they're also I mean I
had three kids under three, and then the last one
came four years later.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
There's just a lot of them.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
It just always felt like a lot of chaos to
do that. And here's the basic thing with our kids.
They're pretty good kids. They're not entitled, old, they're pretty grounded.
They're really like I'm not saying they're perfect by anythings,
but they're really, really nice, good kids who like I'll
use Nikki as an example, like he was trying.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
He spent the semester in Italy.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
I mean, he would sit on a plane in the
middle seats on a flight, you know, and be as happy,
maybe not as happy, but as if he was in
first class, like he's traveled all different ways. I think
all the kids have, and they're they're just they're cool.
I think just the way we've disciplined them over the years.
(36:36):
My my parenting has always been I will give you
as much, you know, leash as you can handle until
I have to rein it back in.
Speaker 3 (36:44):
And they never they never gave us a problem like that.
Speaker 1 (36:47):
I never had to like speak to them about you're
coming home too late or They've always been good.
Speaker 2 (36:53):
Yeah, but they we never didn't tie, you know, chores with.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
Yours into allowances.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
Totally screwed up in the we're not people to give
advice in that no one area. My son, we're dinner
last night and he was telling this girlfriend he's senior
in college, so we pay for one hundred percent and
he goes, yeah, you know, we went to this party
and they had some food there, but we didn't eat
(37:20):
the food. So we came home and we and we
made some steaks, and I go, you made some steaks here.
I was like, yeah, there were great steaks. And I
look at his girlfriend. I go wow, Because Nikki likes
to cook, and.
Speaker 3 (37:34):
So that sounded reasonable that they had stopped him picking.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
I thought okay. So they went to the supermarket and
they bought some steaks and I seasoned them. They cooked them. Well,
how cute that must have been. And then I go,
he goes, it was a great steak, and his wife
and his girlfriend goes, yeah STK. I go, you came
home and just ordered from STK to go And I go, okay,
all right, that's the problem.
Speaker 1 (37:56):
When you moved out, did your parents cut you off
financially or did they continue to support you.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
I had a paper out at ten, and they paid
for you know, my room. My mom made dinner. From
the age of ten on, my mom made dinner, would
buy me some school clothes, the occasional sneakers. I paid
for every extra and then as soon as I graduated
(38:27):
high school, it was all on me. I was a waiter.
Speaker 3 (38:30):
I had student loans.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
I got, I got. I had student loans. But I
you know, I yeah, I went to us Lay Medical
School because like you know, six hundred a year, and
then everything else I took loans for. But I was
a waiter, a server in a restaurant till my third
year of medical school.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
Is that crazy?
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Yeah? And so I, you know, if I wanted to
have fun. I worked, I worked there, I had I
always had a job, always.
Speaker 3 (38:58):
I had a cush at your life.
Speaker 1 (38:59):
Yeah, yes, I I mean my first job was in
high school. I got hired to be in a series
of videos and film strips about note taking outlining skills.
And I used the money and I bought my first
chanel belt.
Speaker 3 (39:21):
And I still have it.
Speaker 2 (39:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:24):
And then I went to college, and.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Obviously they supported me in college. And then I got
out of college and moved to LA and my parents
considered themselves patrons of the arts for a few years.
But I will tell you I so wanted to be
independent that I remember, like you know, I had a
fourteen piece big band that I toured with, and you know,
I was making money, and like anything, I could start
(39:48):
taking over myself. I was so happy. I did a
cruise some credit card debt, but I remember being able
to pay for my contact lenses for the first time myself,
and nothing made me happier. And then when I got
my first high paying acting job, I wiped out, wiped
out my debt, started a Schwab account, got some stocks,
(40:09):
he started investing, and I never ever That's where my
fear of debt came in. I did not like that feeling,
you know, seeing those credit card statements, pay the minimum,
occurring more interest.
Speaker 3 (40:22):
That really terrified me, and so I didn't.
Speaker 1 (40:25):
I didn't never want to be in that position again
until I learned about by borrow die.
Speaker 3 (40:29):
And good debt and you know mortgages and.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
Writing off you know, the first one point one million
of mortgage and all that kind of thing.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
So then I understood all of that.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
But yeah, as soon as I could, I wanted to
be financially independent.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:45):
What's what's a lesson about money that you hope our
children carry with them into adulthood.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
It's it's the basics. The basics are so simple. You
you got to consistently, just like you've got to diet
and ex or so, you've got to consistently put money away. Yes,
it's critical, and don't spend more than you make. You know,
(41:11):
it's funny for me, you know, once I got to
the point where I could buy anything I wanted, I
lost all interest in it. But when I remember when
I was a general surgery resident, I was moonlighting in
the emergency room, I was making eighth I was in
a laboratory. You do a lab year and I was
making in nineteen eighty six, one hundred and fifty dollars
(41:33):
an hour working as a doctor in emergency room, and
I was so into it. I'd go in at nine
pm on a Friday and work the entire weekend. They
give you like three hour shifts to go to sleep
and come back, and I worked till nine am Monday morning.
And in three months, I made like fifty eight thousand dollars.
And people said, what are you going to do with
(41:53):
all that money? And I said, and I knew nothing
about money because I didn't know what I didn't even
know what the mean meet, what the word mortgage meant.
And here I am, you know, twenty eight I'm a
surgical resident, and I had no concept of saving. About
a Porsche.
Speaker 3 (42:11):
Yeah, that's what guys do.
Speaker 2 (42:14):
I bought a Porsche that had a phone in and
a MULTIDISCD player.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
Here it is.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
And I will tell you something. That was the last
time that I ever enjoyed a material thing in my life.
And thank God.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
That that is so not true. I enjoyed had that
Mercedes you loved.
Speaker 2 (42:29):
But that was yours. So I felt okay about it.
Oh okay. Once I got successful, every time I bought
something good, I had too much middle class guilt about
it or whatever they call.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
Okay, so give like your what's your wrap up? What
do you want people to know?
Speaker 2 (42:45):
Okay? I don't care how old you are and if
you're lung, if you're young listening to this like your twenties, thirties,
early forties, Congratulations you're hearing this because you start right now.
Tomorrow you go open up an investment account, look at
the stuff you use the most of and buy that company. Okay,
(43:10):
and every single month pay that before you pay yourself.
You got to pay that at least twenty percent. And
then talk to your friends about money, because the more
you talk about it, the more you'll learn about it.
Be really open about it, the open figure out. It's
a lot easier making saving and becoming very wealthy is
(43:32):
a lot easier than playing Monopoly. Ill Notopoly is very
complicated in I buy this, I buy that, But it's
a simple board game. This is a lot easier. It's
a lot simpler to do if you just do it regularly.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
My wrap up is set yourself up for success, whatever
stage you're at, have the conversations. Don't be afraid to
have the conversations, and like Terry was saying, be open
to listening and learning because there's so many things you
don't know. We were at a wedding this weekend with
(44:09):
some billionaires who have different had different takes on things
that we're fascinating and we don't have that. But if
you can walk away from someone with one pearl of
something to do, like the five point twenty nine plan
for your kids, just one pearl you have one. Have
the conversations with your partner, have the hard conversations with
(44:31):
your parents before they get there or if they're getting close,
have the conversations with your kids, and set yourself up
for success because someday we're all going to be older,
we're all going to want to retire, we're all going
to slow down, and you want to know what you're
doing right now affects that. That's my takeaway and for us,
(44:53):
we're now realizing that most of our money is going
to go to the government, and my take home is
we just need to spend more.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
Oh, oh, spend borrow died by borrow spend.
Speaker 1 (45:04):
Well. We were sitting with our financial people and they
were laying out to us, you know what you can
leave to people, and which you can't, and how much
the government gets.
Speaker 3 (45:12):
And I looked at Terry and I go, all I'm
hearing is we're not spending enough.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
Yeah, So on that note, should we shopping? I'm joking.
All right, everybody, Thank you so much for listening. Remember
that we release episodes every Wednesday at four am Pacific time.
You can listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Heather Dubrow and I'm Terry Durou, and we're going
to keep this between us, not really. So there's a
lot of stuff we want to talk about today kind
of based off of what was on Real Housewives last week.
But before we do that, you are not going to
do this. Do you all remember last week the choking story?
(00:26):
Do you all remember the choking story of mister shows unbelievable? Okay,
no one picked up the bill. Let me just refresh you.
No one Victor with the bill at a YadA.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Saved a life, mister joos, no Victor bill, no dessert, nothing, nothing.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Five days later, I was meeting up with this gal,
high level executive producer gal, and Terry knows her as well, and.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I was like, listen, I'm gonna go meet with her.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
We're gonna go to this place rooftop whatever, and we're
gonna hang out.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
I go, why don't you join us later?
Speaker 1 (00:56):
Like, give us like an hour and a half so
we can have a girl time and all that kind
of thing.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Then you come meet us.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
So Terry comes and meets us, walks in and maybe
what twenty minutes later, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (01:09):
She was talking and eating and talking and eating, and
all of a sudden she choked. She choked, like the
full blown thing.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
We are sitting like in a round booth, right and
she's in between us and Terry and I just she
was choking. We both looked at her and we're like,
I think we had it unspoken. Oh, she's choking. Terry
turned her so her back was to him. He's heimlicking
her while I have my napkin under her mouth talking
(01:40):
to her, and I'm like, you're fine, it's all okay.
Terry's got you, and you're talking to from behind her.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yeah, And I think I gave her the same warning
I gave the other person. And mister Chaws, this hurt,
but don't worry. It's gonna be fine. Except I did
it like three times harder than I did it mister Choles,
because mister Chills had to do it four times.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
This was what three?
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Oh I thought I did one. That was two h two.
I think to livet more weights. So yeah, I did it,
and she was fully like.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Fully, it was like a full choking situation. We're in
the corner of this restaurant, this rooftop. No one else
is there upstairs, and then the poor thing so get
really embarrassed when they choke. What is the thing about
choking and embarrassment.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
Well, because it's like, you know, hey, I might have
died from you in front of you, and I just
created an emergency. It's embarrassing. Cried a little bit sweet,
but yeah, and it was unbelievable because I mean, I've
been on doctor for a long time and I've heimlickd
(02:54):
a few people in my life. But twice in.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Five days is that crazy. I had to heimlick my grandmother.
I was in high school. We were alone in the house.
She was choking, and I had to heimlick her. Got
an airway and she was like, you know, like I
had like a bit of a chubby, you know, kind
of mid section.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
She was cute.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
She was so cute, my grandma.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
But so, you know, hard to know where the we
do it, and you know, and I'm a lay person
and you know, seventeen or something. Yeah, heim licked her.
And then I remember I called my aunt because I
think my mom was out of town.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I called my aunt.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I said, come get your mother up the buck because
I didn't want to be alone with her.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
I was so nervous.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Well, it's so scary you think about it. I mean,
if it doesn't work.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
They're dead. And some of us don't know how to
do a criake.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Well who does Nobody doesn't you? Yeah, I don't think
anybody should ever try that unless you have some training.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Yeah. I wouldn't. I wouldn't try slitting the throat's open.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Yeah. And so I realized that I've done the Heimlick
maneuver more than doctor Heimlichez if you think about it.
But it was weird. And then as we were coming
out of.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Mister Chows and we had the choker at this rooftop.
And then we were at a party at Mister Chows
for our friend Candy the other night and we were
coming out.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
And TMZ came up to us and said, so, Terry,
we heard that you had there was somebody choking Mister
Chows five days ago. And you know, it's funny. I've
seen variations of the report on TMZ. I saw the
one they edited and put on TMS Live, and then
I've seen like the long slow one that they have
(04:42):
on their website where I walk out and they interview
us and I go through the whole story, and I go, yeah, yeah,
because the one that they put on TMZ Live that
they edited was just kind of fun right because it
was edited. Because it was edited, and so that I
came out, I said, but here's the thing. You know,
they didn't even pay for my meal or off for
(05:04):
a dessert. And then I said, but don't tell mister Chow.
And then at first I thought, oh my god, this
is so bad. Mister Chows is never going to serve
me again. I really was actually worried about that, but
then I was so complimentary to mister Chows. But who knows,
although it's TMZ, who doesn't see.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
Team Yeah, we go there all the time.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Yeah, but it was weird.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
To two times in five days. Now, I don't know
if you're good luck.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Or bad luck.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
It's funny.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
I was ready, do we want to eat with you
because you save? Or do we not want to eat
with you because you're a bad luck because someone chokes?
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Well, what's weird is we were at a wedding this
weekend and I was at the gym during the day
and the girl next to me was running on the treadmill,
bell on the treadmill right next to me and was
holding on for dear life. She's getting slammed by the
belt and she's like, I look over and it's like
(05:59):
an emergence. See situation, maybe not as bad as the
Heimlich And I reach over and I I hit stop
on the thing and she let go and it stopped.
And I thought, that's three. Three. Some neighbor were done
three emergency. Three emergencies. Was funny because I was somewhere
last night and something broke or something. I don't know.
(06:21):
It was a restaurant, but there was a very loud
noise and I thought, really, is this going to be four? Amazing? Nah?
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Things coming threes? Yeah, funny.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
So that's over with.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
So if you see Terry in a restaurant, I don't know,
be careful. Chew your food. Yeah, the PSA is chew
your food.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
You know, it's funny. I was reading the study last
night and when you know, you know what you're supposed
to do CPR and people yep, seventy three percent of
the time that you do CPR and you get them
back have very significant brain damage. Yes, so yes, what's
(07:00):
the moral of the CPR The hell out of them
as early as you possibly can to keep the brain
the blood flow of their brain. But I imagine think
about that. That's CPR. I mean, you have like two
two and a half minutes to go without oxygen your
brain and it's over.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
This is exciting.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Yeah, let me move on to the mundane. I have
a ZiT right under my nose that I could not
attack yet because I was putting my makeup on. And
the reason I'm bringing up is something in my algorithm.
And I asked our daughter Max to and she's the
same thing is telling me that you cannot pop a
ZiT anywhere in the triangle around your nose because it's
(07:39):
going to go to your brain and you're going to die.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
True or false? Yeah that's false. It sounds good, but
it's get this.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Have you seen this, Yeah, I've heard of called the
golden triangle or something you're not about.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
You're supposed to not popposite.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
That's anywhere like round your nose and the nasal labial
fold like anywhere here.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
So the theory being that it gets into the veins
in that area, which tracks back to like the retinal
artery and vein or into it's not that far from
the blood brain barrier. They can get right to the
brain and the cause of meningiz or brain infection. It's
I mean, I'm sure an infection on the face has
(08:19):
done that before. But and could you find an article
about somebody who popped the ZiT or claim the pop
is it or it is probably more of an abscess
and it happened, sure, But the larger concern is if
you have filler injected in that area. Oh and yeah,
you know, like the hyaluronic acids or the sculptures, and
(08:40):
if you get into an artery or a vein in
that area, it can do one of two things which
are very very bad. And it's on the consent form
and it's a non complication sculpture too, yeah, for all
any of it. And it's a non complication that happens
even if the doctor does it right, because you know
he doesn't have eyes in the tip of his needles.
(09:01):
It can get back into a major blood vessel that
supplies that part of the skin of the face and
the whole area, like for example, the cheek tip of
your nose can die through lack of circulation.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
So you'd have to have it injected there. Like if
it's a site you don't have injected you're fine.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
You're fine, but that can happen.
Speaker 3 (09:20):
Care about myself right now.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
That can happen from any filler, and it does happen,
and then there's an algorithm we go through that we
see it starting to happen. You're supposed to do all
these reversals life. What you put on nitro paste, open
up the blood vessels. You immediately start injected hyaluronidase to
dissolve the hyaluronic acid. You're supposed to put on these
other kinds of creams and so on, so that can
(09:44):
get into the blood supply of the skin and on botch.
We had several patients that happened too that we had
to fix. Or even worse, it can get into the
infra orbital artery in vein right here, and then you
go blind and then it goes back to your retinal
in vain and causes blindness and by the way, very depressing.
As an expert medical legal excerpt, I've seen this a
(10:06):
dozen times. So that's theoretically what can happen with a
z it that you pop, but in reality that doesn't
really happen. But it does happen with fillers, So be careful.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
You can't poposit where you have filler.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I think you can popposite where you have filler, but
you probably shouldn't have filler where you have filler.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
In other words, it's really did anyone understand that?
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Yeah? Meaning you can popposit where you have filler, because
I don't think it happens. But those areas that you're
concerned about popping a z it causing a brain infection
actually can cause it a problem with filler in those areas.
So it's true for a filler, not true for a.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Pimple, Okay, And that's easier to fix.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Yeah, kind I feel much. By the way, this is
a little bit of a callback to last week. I
do have some more information that I have looked up
and gleaned, and now I can add to my areas
of expertise. I have more detailed information about ozembic vulva.
In case you're interested, Are we interestedly?
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Right?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
I thought you would be, because I thought your action
last week was very funny. By the way, it's very cute.
Ozembic vulva is not necessarily due to just the rapid
weight loss. It's a phenomenon referred to as tryness down
there lack of lubrication and irritation because you've lost so
much body fat as a woman, and body fat particularly postmenopausal,
(11:33):
pre menopausal. Most of your estrogen comes from your ovaries. Post menopausal,
you know your ovaries are not working. So where does
your estron come from? We take it it comes from
your fat cells, so that if you lose a lot
of weight very rapidly, your fat cells make a lot
less estrogen, and that's what's causing this irritation and dryness
(11:57):
down there that they're referring to as ov zempiic vultle.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
But that's an internal thing.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Yeah, so zemb volva is not necessarily just like floppiness cosmetic.
That's yeah, No it's not. It's it's more really referring
to sort of the functional dryness, lack of lubrication, and
irritation that happens related to lack of.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Estrogen from being a woman. Just sucks. Yeah, it's still
much crap.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
It's funny because as I'm reading this article, that's why
I get boobs when I get fatter. It's not because estrogen.
It's yeah, it's not just because I get more fat
in my breast area. It's because I'm heavier, therefore my
fat cells are making more estrogen. Therefore my ducks, my
(12:47):
breast glands are getting bigger. No, right now, I'm sort
of a middle obesity level. I don't think I have
that much kind of capacity, although I would were black
and I had to wear a white shirt for something
we did recently. What was I the Backstreet Boys? Right,
(13:07):
And so we went and got a white T shirt.
I went and yet, Nope, boobs not gonna don't want
to see that.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
I did wear it, though you looked good.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Yeah, thank you, but I was covering the boobs with something.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Okay, Yeah, all right, So I actually.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
Learned a little bit from the whole zembic volva thing.
I just want to say, I'm glad I done a
very interesting.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
It is interesting. That's not one of my issues. I
have others.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Okay, So we've been wanting to talk about. We get
a lot of questions, but all kinds of things. We
get asked about our relationship, we get asked about our kids,
we'd asked about our homes, but we get asked about
how we deal with finances as a couple. And we
have been very transparent over the years about things that
(14:01):
have happened to us. We've talked here on this show
about you know, house fails that we've had and lost money.
We've talked in the past about being scammed out of
a couple of million dollars, which will give you a
little refresher if you haven't heard that story. But it
really has changed the way we've done our finances over
the years. Now.
Speaker 3 (14:19):
If you were watching Real Housewives of.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Orange County last week, we were sitting with Emily and Gretchen.
I had like a little sleepover party, and we were
talking to Gretchen about her finances with Slate. Oh yeah,
and it was you know, it was interesting first of all,
just to hear, you know, what Gretchen's take on finances
(14:43):
and that she doesn't want to be beholden to a man.
And I thought all of that was super smart, very interesting.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
But there were other.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Things we all went huh, like, you know, there's like
a little bit of everything.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
Anyway, go watch the Episode's kind of interesting.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
But it got Terry and I to take you know,
because Gretchen said, boy, this is such a weird these
are weird questions and I was like, not really, And
so the family that I grew up in did not
talk about finances at all, and that was to their
detriment in many cases. When Terry and I first got together,
(15:18):
there were things that I assumed he was handling that
I didn't think of, and I had my head buried
in the sand, even though I'm a smart person.
Speaker 3 (15:25):
I had my own financial.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Success on my own before because we got together, you
know a little bit later, and.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
You had a big Hollywood business manager when I first
met you, right.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
So we were both handled. But then you know, as
you're together and you start commingling, and as we had
kids and all of that, I just thought the whole
thing was super interesting. Where do we want to begin
with finances?
Speaker 2 (15:51):
Well, I mean, I think I grew up in an
environment where not only did you not talk about finances,
there were nothing there was. You basically didn't have money.
You spent what you made, right, and that's it. That's
how you live. You didn't focus on saving, and in
your situation, your family made money, but they didn't talk
(16:14):
about it. And then I remember meeting your father and
other members of your family, and I talked, I come
from the generation of CNBC where we talk a lot about.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
It, which is so good, because the whole point is
if you share information with each other, you all learn,
you all prosper. But I came from such a nineteen
fifties family where no one talked about anything, and everyone.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
Was swept under the rug, and no one talked about money,
and it was a thing that it.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Took me a long time to reprogram myself to terry talking.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
About it with people.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Yeah, so I remember I would talk about it and
they wouldn't say anything. And then I realized, oh, is
this like they didn't stay totally day class, say, totally inappropriate,
totally the like, you shouldn't be talking about this stuff.
This is almost like low class or something that I'm
(17:11):
talking about it. So they never wanted to talk about it.
And then I realized that occasionally, over the years, and
this is the let the take home lesson to the
talking about it, I would have sort of a semi
financial conversation with some members of your family and they
knew nothing about it, nothing, and they didn't have even
(17:31):
a working appreciation for money.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
Which is so weird because my dad was a.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Brilliant, brilliant, smartest guy in the family by far.
Speaker 3 (17:40):
Brilliant guy.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
But yeah, just was not and could probably tell you
every stock, every everything, probably knew all that, yes, but
that was not his thing.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
No clue, no. And so the starting message here is
that you need to talk about it because it's the
only way you're going to learn about it. And it's
it's not very difficult. But there are a few basic
fundamental principles that if you learn them early on and
you use them, you will be successfully and wild You'll
(18:15):
be amazingly and wildly successful and stable in the later
parts of your life, even if you made very little
money your whole life.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Let me just take them back a little bit, because
I want people to understand, since we questioned Gretchen, I
want to explain like sort of how we started.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
So, like Terry said, I was an actress.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
I made a lot of money. I had a Hollywood
business manager. Terry was a plastic surgeon already when we met.
And as we started commingling, you know, we got a
bank account together, I think was the first thing, right, Yeah,
And then eventually we merged our everything, even our investment stuff, even.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Our stock, our stock, a separate stock count, separate stock account,
screw it.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
We put it all together.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
But our a big shift for us, and this was
a I mean a big shift for us. We were
percolating along and doing our thing and making a lot
of money and whatever we were doing, investing whatever.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
So we had someone in.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Our life a CPA who we thought was a guy
who thought was a CPA that was vetted from very
high level people. So we didn't vet him because we thought, oh,
they're with these people, so they are good. And he
had said to Terry after we had one particular liquidity event,
he said, oh, you know, you're now part of my
guys and they all get these opportunities to and they
(19:42):
make all this money.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
It was a criminal enterprise. Basically we didn't know it.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
We also didn't know that the guy wasn't a CPA.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
He was a tax prep guy, not a CPA. So
he got Terry involved in this deal scam and it
was about renting.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
Oh for the World Cup. She was renting this. She
was a complete criminal.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Criminal renting out these apartments that were then going to
be leased out for the World Cup and make all
this money at Papapa.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Took our money and spent it. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
Yeah, so Terry.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
And this and the tax guy said, I'll personally guarantee it.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
Of course, I said, so on my attorney, and so
the attorney.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Yeah, and so I said, okay, that she's not paying
it back, I want it from you. And the guy goes, well,
that's great, but I don't have any money.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
So we ended up losing two million dollars and it
was turned out to be a scam, the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
And I remember we.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Talked about it our friends and whatnot, and I remember
people saying, aren't you upset with him?
Speaker 3 (20:43):
And I said, of course not.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
You were shockingly cool about it.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Because of course I was cool about it because our
system of checks and balances failed.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
And that's just the truth.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
You know, why didn't I ask him certain questions there
was a personal guarantee.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
I didn't say, what's the collateral? We failed? It wasn't
Terry that failed. We failed.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
What was good about that was that we sat down
and I said, oh, my gosh, I am my mother,
and I did not realize that I am being my
mother and I have no idea what's going on.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
And I'm assuming you've got this handled and we're not
having these very important conversations, and we need to do that.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
And we completely changed our entire thing.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Yeah, it's like, you know, sometimes something very negative forces
you to change your checks and balances in your systems
so that it turns out to be worth the cost almost.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
One hundred percent. And I'm not saying two million dollars
is not a lot of money. It's a fuck ton
of money. But I do believe that that loss prevented
us from doing something larger and stupid down the road.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Yeah, you really do. Yeah, So I think that one
thing I've never really said is, you know, people assume
we have a certain amount of resources, and they're always
saying they're this, so that we do, and I think
people be surprised we have more than that.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
People.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
Well, I'll tell you why. Because people assume it because
I've made so much money as a plastic surgeon, and
I do TV shows and you do TV shows. It
is not I have made a lot of money as
a plastic surgeon, okay, and you have made a lot
of money doing television shows. And we've made a lot
of money selling houses in real estate. But the reason
(22:38):
we have a massed whatever we have is not because
of them. What we've made is what we've done with
our money, and that is key to this discussion. In
my opinion, if you appreciate that, you know, at least
talk about the eighth wonder of the world. I don't
know if people understand that one of the world is
(23:01):
compounding interest. What we did back then because of what happened,
is we said, Okay, we need a program, we need
a program of regular investments. We regular and frequent, really
really frequent investments. And for example, I started to freak
(23:21):
out a long time ago when we had twins about
I don't want to be in the situation when, even
if we're wealthy, I don't want to be.
Speaker 3 (23:27):
In a situation where we have no money.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
For two twins going to college at eighteen, and then
three years later there's another one going in three years earlier,
there's another one going all of a sudden, we have
three or four at the same time, or all four
in college, grad school, all requiring a boat ton of money,
a ton of money, and we didn't say anything for college.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Let me tell you what we didn't do, which I
absolutely think people need to do. Before you get married,
before you get serious in a relationship, you've got to
have financial conversations.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
What's your credit score? Do you have debt. How do
you view money? What do you think it's.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Important to spend on your Are your parents gonna need
help when they're older? What's your obligation there? These are
things that you must, must, must talk about because those
can kill a marriage. We did not have those conversations.
We've been very lucky. But I will tell you when
(24:31):
this thing happened and we lost all this money and
we sat down and had our own come to Jesus thing,
it was like, all right, we.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
Got a divide and conquer. Who's doing what?
Speaker 1 (24:41):
And I think people would be very surprised to know
that I handle our money.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Yeah, I handle the investments. You handle the money.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
Terry handles the investments. I handle the money, and I
handle the real estate.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Yeah, I'm the saver. Well I mean to say I'm
the savior, you're the spender. What I mean is I'm Yeah,
I'm the one who invests the money. You manage the
money that we make.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
So what's interesting is that the difference between men and women.
I'm just talking about heterosexual couples right now, but the
difference between men and women is typically women are more
conservative than men. So it's a good yin yang. So
I don't care. You know who you are, who your
partner is, whatever. You got to make sure that one
(25:22):
of you is more conservative with money and one of
you is a little bit of a.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
Risk taker with money, because that's.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Exactly the balance you need, because if you're too conservative,
you will miss out. We have friends, I'm not going
to say who this is, but we have friends that
were buying a second home and the wife insisted to
the husband that they paid for it with kash because
she did not want debt. Now I understand not wanting debt.
(25:51):
I had credit card debt when I was younger, first
big TV show. I paid it off. I don't like debt.
It makes me uncomfortable. However, there's certain kinds of debt
that are really good. And so if you if you
don't have someone that's a little bit of a risk taker,
you're going to lose out on making your money work
for you. So in general, and then I'm going to
(26:13):
let you talk about compounding in just in all the
things you want to talk about. But basically, what we
decided to do is that I would handle the day
to day of our money.
Speaker 3 (26:21):
That was the first thing.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Terry handles the investments that means we don't. Of course
we discuss things, but in general that susan charge. Together
we decided about the kids. Yes, so explain what we
did with the kids. So everyone needs to do.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
So, you know, put in a college account, open up
an account as soon as your kid is born. You've
got to go to Every state has this, by the way,
I think absolutely every state has their version of the
California five to twenty nine plan. I think it's called
five twenty seven planned some states, but it's a five
to twenty something.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
Plan right here at ScholarShare.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Yeah, ScholarShare, that's what we call in California. And it's
you have to open it up immediately as soon as
the kid's born. And by the way, put fifty bucks
any month into it. Every other month, okay, every third month,
but always be putting this in. And what it does
is you put after tax money in it, but it
(27:17):
grows tax free, so that when by the time that
eighteen years later and you've had eighteen years of compounding interest.
The eighth wonder of the world, which is like a
snowball rolling down. It's a very small snowball. It gets
bigger and bigger and bigger by the time eighteen years later.
If you put fifty dollars in it every other month,
(27:39):
you have way more than you need for college education.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
And there's calculators on those five twenty nine plans that
you can go in there and be like, Okay, it's
never too late to start. See, this is how old
my kid is, this is how much time I have
into college.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
What do I have to put in? And here's what else.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
I'm going to tell you all those kills plastic toys
that people want to buy your kids for their birthday
and tell your family, hey, instead of that they need
these three things, these are the three toys they're gonna love.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
I'm gonna buy them for them.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
If you would like to invest in my child's future,
you can. You can give to the five twenty nine plan.
And that's what you have people do for their birthdays,
for the holidays, or major graduations of eighth grade, whatever
it is. It is such a great thing to do
because I will tell you that we have three kids
(28:35):
now in college and those are three less things we're
paying for.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
Yeah, and even if they end up not using it,
you can use it for your own educational purposes.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Yes, like say, Terry and I wanted to study birds
in the Galopogo's island. Boom, thank you for not going
to grad school, Nikki. The other thing on the other
side of that spectrum is your parents long term healthcare.
This is very important to look into. Not everyone will
be eligible for this. The price assurance, the price varies
(29:08):
from you know, area to area. But this is something
you absolutely should look into for your parents. We are
in a situation right now with Terry's mom that it
has been very helpful because that kind of care can
get very expensive.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
It's an insurance policy.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
It's an insurance you explain it.
Speaker 2 (29:26):
Yeah, it's a long term care insurance policy. It's very
If your parents are younger, it's really inexpensive.
Speaker 3 (29:33):
Yeah, get on it.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
Yeah, and hopefully you'll never need it. But if everyone
gets old, if they get sick, you know, you don't
want to send them into a nursing home that you
have to pay for that you can't afford. Yeah. Okay,
So that's the other thing. And the other thing is
I don't care how old you are. Oh and by
the way, even if your kid's fifteen, you should open
(29:55):
up a California five to twenty nine. Plan right now,
let the money grow for the next three years, because
look what the stock market's done, and it will continue
to do that over the next fifteen, eighteen, twenty years.
And then the other thing you have to do is,
I don't care if you are unemployed you work intermittently.
(30:15):
You have to open up an account, an investment account
at a investment place firm, and start investing in stocks
that you've heard of.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
That's the whole key to investing. It's got to be
if you understand what they do and you can invest
in them. You can't figure out what they do, don't bother.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
I remember a long time ago, when Heathern and I
first started dating. I had a giant year. This was
even before I was on TV. I had a really
big year. I made a ton of money and I
said to my dad, look how much I gross this year?
Was it the end of the year? And he goes,
how much of that do you have left? What do
(31:06):
you mean, dad? He goes, well, of that, whatever you made,
where is that money? And I go, I don't know.
And he goes, well, how much do you have Do
you have it in an account somewhere? Did you put
it into a house. Did you buy stocks with it?
I go, I don't have any of it left. He goes,
(31:26):
so you spend it all? I go, I spent it all.
He goes, well, first of all, you're gonna now going
to have to borrow money to pay the taxes on that,
and then you had nothing to show for it. So
you basically worked like a maniac, made a fortune relative fortune,
and you have nothing. And I went, whoa, And he
said to me, so his generation was, he said, you've
(31:46):
got to go buy a house. You got to buy
a house, because that'll force you to at least put
money into a house. And then, of course I started
getting interested in stocks, and we started very very very
early everything. And the thing you did you dine every
year is i'd make money and you go, hey, we
have this money, and I go, can I have some
(32:08):
of it? And you go yeah, And you would give
me a chunk of it, whatever it was. And that
was money that I could invest. And that's the reason
we are as successful as we are.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
And our producers have written a bunch of questions here
which I think are great. But they asked, do you
too agree on spending and saving or do you ever clash.
Speaker 2 (32:31):
Financially, well, we don't discuss saving. I do it. I
never tell you about it, except meaning. What I mean
is you give.
Speaker 3 (32:44):
Me money, right, and then you invest it and I invest.
That's what I'm saying. That's spending or saving we agree on.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Once I got successful, I lost all interest in material goods.
Speaker 3 (32:57):
So nice for me.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
Yeah, it's good for you. And you never ask me
if it's okay. If you buy something, you just buy it, right? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (33:07):
So am I?
Speaker 1 (33:07):
So, Heather, are you the type of wife who keeps
her shopping purchases hidden from her husband or vice versa?
Speaker 3 (33:13):
You don't shop?
Speaker 2 (33:14):
So do I think you keep your shopping hidden from me?
I would say, define hidden, but I would say you, yes,
in a way. You buy a bunch of stuff and
you don't show me, and then just it appears on
(33:35):
your wh Why.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Would I show you? That would be stupid.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
But this is the question.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
Yeah, no, but I'm not hiding things. Like here's the thing.
Terry doesn't know what things cost. He doesn't know what
parties cost. He doesn't know what vacations costs.
Speaker 3 (33:47):
He doesn't You.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
Don't, right, would you agree that you have no idea
what a trip costs?
Speaker 2 (33:52):
I would agree that I have no idea how much
you spend on this trips.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
That's true, But I would also so irritated with Terry
when he makes wife jokes like like she spends all
so much money and all that. Because I handle all
the money and trust me, I could rob us blind,
but I do not.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
No, I think we got lucky because you you have
a good sense of you do spend money on things.
Look at the beautiful clothes you wear and the stuff
that you have. But I trust I am right that
you'll keep it with my rane.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
Listen, I spend appropriately, always.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
Have, Yeah, relative to where we are, you always kept
it in range. I never get like a call from
our bookkeeper who says, oh my gosh, you don't have
enough money to pay Louis Chan.
Speaker 3 (34:44):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
No, and then you give me this money and you
and I put it. I never ever told you what
I what stocks I buy with it.
Speaker 3 (34:56):
He tells me after the fact.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I tell you after the fact, except a couple times
you've said, stop buying Fashle, stop buying Tesla, stop buying
it because.
Speaker 3 (35:07):
We have yes, And of course he does it anyway.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
I do it anyway because it and every time you
said to me, you know, thank god I continue to
buy it because I did listen.
Speaker 3 (35:19):
He does what he does well.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
I do what I do well. Do you believe in
giving your kids an allowance? And if so, do you
tie it to chores or just provided as a teaching tool.
I'm gonna tell you where we screwed up. There's no allowance,
there is no chores. We did not do those things. No,
I started with an allowance. I tried once. There was
(35:43):
so many of them, and they're also I mean I
had three kids under three, and then the last one
came four years later.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
There's just a lot of them.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
It just always felt like a lot of chaos to
do that. And here's the basic thing with our kids.
They're pretty good kids. They're not entitled, old, they're pretty grounded.
They're really like I'm not saying they're perfect by anythings,
but they're really, really nice, good kids who like I'll
use Nikki as an example, like he was trying.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
He spent the semester in Italy.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
I mean, he would sit on a plane in the
middle seats on a flight, you know, and be as happy,
maybe not as happy, but as if he was in
first class, like he's traveled all different ways. I think
all the kids have, and they're they're just they're cool.
I think just the way we've disciplined them over the years.
(36:36):
My my parenting has always been I will give you
as much, you know, leash as you can handle until
I have to rein it back in.
Speaker 3 (36:44):
And they never they never gave us a problem like that.
Speaker 1 (36:47):
I never had to like speak to them about you're
coming home too late or They've always been good.
Speaker 2 (36:53):
Yeah, but they we never didn't tie, you know, chores with.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
Yours into allowances.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
Totally screwed up in the we're not people to give
advice in that no one area. My son, we're dinner
last night and he was telling this girlfriend he's senior
in college, so we pay for one hundred percent and
he goes, yeah, you know, we went to this party
and they had some food there, but we didn't eat
(37:20):
the food. So we came home and we and we
made some steaks, and I go, you made some steaks here.
I was like, yeah, there were great steaks. And I
look at his girlfriend. I go wow, Because Nikki likes
to cook, and.
Speaker 3 (37:34):
So that sounded reasonable that they had stopped him picking.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
I thought okay. So they went to the supermarket and
they bought some steaks and I seasoned them. They cooked them. Well,
how cute that must have been. And then I go,
he goes, it was a great steak, and his wife
and his girlfriend goes, yeah STK. I go, you came
home and just ordered from STK to go And I go, okay,
all right, that's the problem.
Speaker 1 (37:56):
When you moved out, did your parents cut you off
financially or did they continue to support you.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
I had a paper out at ten, and they paid
for you know, my room. My mom made dinner. From
the age of ten on, my mom made dinner, would
buy me some school clothes, the occasional sneakers. I paid
for every extra and then as soon as I graduated
(38:27):
high school, it was all on me. I was a waiter.
Speaker 3 (38:30):
I had student loans.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
I got, I got. I had student loans. But I
you know, I yeah, I went to us Lay Medical
School because like you know, six hundred a year, and
then everything else I took loans for. But I was
a waiter, a server in a restaurant till my third
year of medical school.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
Is that crazy?
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Yeah? And so I, you know, if I wanted to
have fun. I worked, I worked there, I had I
always had a job, always.
Speaker 3 (38:58):
I had a cush at your life.
Speaker 1 (38:59):
Yeah, yes, I I mean my first job was in
high school. I got hired to be in a series
of videos and film strips about note taking outlining skills.
And I used the money and I bought my first
chanel belt.
Speaker 3 (39:21):
And I still have it.
Speaker 2 (39:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:24):
And then I went to college, and.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Obviously they supported me in college. And then I got
out of college and moved to LA and my parents
considered themselves patrons of the arts for a few years.
But I will tell you I so wanted to be
independent that I remember, like you know, I had a
fourteen piece big band that I toured with, and you know,
I was making money, and like anything, I could start
(39:48):
taking over myself. I was so happy. I did a
cruise some credit card debt, but I remember being able
to pay for my contact lenses for the first time myself,
and nothing made me happier. And then when I got
my first high paying acting job, I wiped out, wiped
out my debt, started a Schwab account, got some stocks,
(40:09):
he started investing, and I never ever That's where my
fear of debt came in. I did not like that feeling,
you know, seeing those credit card statements, pay the minimum,
occurring more interest.
Speaker 3 (40:22):
That really terrified me, and so I didn't.
Speaker 1 (40:25):
I didn't never want to be in that position again
until I learned about by borrow die.
Speaker 3 (40:29):
And good debt and you know mortgages and.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
Writing off you know, the first one point one million
of mortgage and all that kind of thing.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
So then I understood all of that.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
But yeah, as soon as I could, I wanted to
be financially independent.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:45):
What's what's a lesson about money that you hope our
children carry with them into adulthood.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
It's it's the basics. The basics are so simple. You
you got to consistently, just like you've got to diet
and ex or so, you've got to consistently put money away. Yes,
it's critical, and don't spend more than you make. You know,
(41:11):
it's funny for me, you know, once I got to
the point where I could buy anything I wanted, I
lost all interest in it. But when I remember when
I was a general surgery resident, I was moonlighting in
the emergency room, I was making eighth I was in
a laboratory. You do a lab year and I was
making in nineteen eighty six, one hundred and fifty dollars
(41:33):
an hour working as a doctor in emergency room, and
I was so into it. I'd go in at nine
pm on a Friday and work the entire weekend. They
give you like three hour shifts to go to sleep
and come back, and I worked till nine am Monday morning.
And in three months, I made like fifty eight thousand dollars.
And people said, what are you going to do with
(41:53):
all that money? And I said, and I knew nothing
about money because I didn't know what I didn't even
know what the mean meet, what the word mortgage meant.
And here I am, you know, twenty eight I'm a
surgical resident, and I had no concept of saving. About
a Porsche.
Speaker 3 (42:11):
Yeah, that's what guys do.
Speaker 2 (42:14):
I bought a Porsche that had a phone in and
a MULTIDISCD player.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
Here it is.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
And I will tell you something. That was the last
time that I ever enjoyed a material thing in my life.
And thank God.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
That that is so not true. I enjoyed had that
Mercedes you loved.
Speaker 2 (42:29):
But that was yours. So I felt okay about it.
Oh okay. Once I got successful, every time I bought
something good, I had too much middle class guilt about
it or whatever they call.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
Okay, so give like your what's your wrap up? What
do you want people to know?
Speaker 2 (42:45):
Okay? I don't care how old you are and if
you're lung, if you're young listening to this like your twenties, thirties,
early forties, Congratulations you're hearing this because you start right now.
Tomorrow you go open up an investment account, look at
the stuff you use the most of and buy that company. Okay,
(43:10):
and every single month pay that before you pay yourself.
You got to pay that at least twenty percent. And
then talk to your friends about money, because the more
you talk about it, the more you'll learn about it.
Be really open about it, the open figure out. It's
a lot easier making saving and becoming very wealthy is
(43:32):
a lot easier than playing Monopoly. Ill Notopoly is very
complicated in I buy this, I buy that, But it's
a simple board game. This is a lot easier. It's
a lot simpler to do if you just do it regularly.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
My wrap up is set yourself up for success, whatever
stage you're at, have the conversations. Don't be afraid to
have the conversations, and like Terry was saying, be open
to listening and learning because there's so many things you
don't know. We were at a wedding this weekend with
(44:09):
some billionaires who have different had different takes on things
that we're fascinating and we don't have that. But if
you can walk away from someone with one pearl of
something to do, like the five point twenty nine plan
for your kids, just one pearl you have one. Have
the conversations with your partner, have the hard conversations with
(44:31):
your parents before they get there or if they're getting close,
have the conversations with your kids, and set yourself up
for success because someday we're all going to be older,
we're all going to want to retire, we're all going
to slow down, and you want to know what you're
doing right now affects that. That's my takeaway and for us,
(44:53):
we're now realizing that most of our money is going
to go to the government, and my take home is
we just need to spend more.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
Oh, oh, spend borrow died by borrow spend.
Speaker 1 (45:04):
Well. We were sitting with our financial people and they
were laying out to us, you know what you can
leave to people, and which you can't, and how much
the government gets.
Speaker 3 (45:12):
And I looked at Terry and I go, all I'm
hearing is we're not spending enough.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
Yeah, So on that note, should we shopping? I'm joking.
All right, everybody, Thank you so much for listening. Remember
that we release episodes every Wednesday at four am Pacific time.
You can listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you get your podcasts.
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