Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
I'm Heather Dubrow, I'm Terry Debrow, and we're going to
keep this between us. Not really, okay, lots of happenings
to discuss, yes, some about us, some not about us.
Divorce we need to discuss. But on the positive side,
no one choked this week.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
That's true. Although nobody choked, there might have been a
chicken or two that did.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Oh get it choked the chicken.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Well, that's because we weren't speaking, so that is entirely
possible that chickens were choked. Yes, you know what, it's
comments like this that I have. That's why our kids
text us on our group chat. End the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Oh right, because we're mega embarrassing, mega mega mega meg embarrassing.
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Cringe, cringe, they say, I.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
Have to say, we've had we had a lovely weekend
and we had some really funditors both be Real Housewives
Beverly Hills adjacent.
Speaker 4 (01:03):
Oh that's right, right, and realize we.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
Had dinner with some friends.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
We went out with Crystal min Cough and Rob Miancoff
they're so nice, and Zoey Deschanel and Jonathan Scott. The
six of us had dinner.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I must say that Jonathan Scott Nicest one of the
most charming people I've ever met in my life.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
He's very charming, he's very sweet's very tall.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
He's very tall.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
And I know you'll hate this very good hair.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
He's got very good hair. I hate it hair. It's tall.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
I hate him. He's he's very sweet. Yeah, he's so likable.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
And I love Zoey's.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Zoeys is so cute, adorable.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
I just love them.
Speaker 4 (01:42):
And they love cats.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Oh, I know they have a lot of cats. And
then we love Rob and Crystal. We've been friends with
them forever and we see them often.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
But tall. Every time I see Crystal.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
She's very tall. Everyone was tall.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
She's extraordinary. I'm luckily I was wearing the lifts that
you expose about me.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
There you go, So you were tall ish.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
I was tall. I was foe tall tall adjacent. Yes.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
And then at the next table, our friend Octavia Spencer,
oh rights having dinner and we hung out. I got
to post some photos of this evening.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
I did. We did take a photo.
Speaker 4 (02:18):
It's funny.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
We're having dinner a Chipriani.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Right that once she did about the astronauts, Yes, you
saw that one. I saw that when she was great
in that one Hidden Figures, Hidden Figures. Yes, brilliant.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
She was amazing.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
She is such a brilliant actress. But she's also just
like so cool.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
She's so cool, she's so nice, So we got to
hang out with her. I love stuff like that. That
usually happens when we go to Craigs. We usually know
a few people at different tables at Craigs.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
And it's fun. It feels more like.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
A club, you know, where you you kind a table
hop and it's fun.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Yeah, but I thought with that many people in the restaurant,
there would be you know, TMZ outside or some paparazzi.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
But yet, no, there we go.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
So it wasn't a complete evening for me. Sorry, it
was a little bit.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
I apologize for that. Next time, I'll call.
Speaker 4 (03:02):
Them for you, so you please, since you know the number.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Since I know the number on Speedo.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Anyway, that was super fun and I you know, it's
funny like we are. As you get older, your circle
really shrinks and it's so unusual to find couples that
you both partners like both partners of the other couple.
But we have a few people that are just spectacular
in this group, in particular, is one of them.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
That was so so fun. And then we went.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Back to the scene of the crime, speaking of choking,
and we went back to mister Chows and we had
dinner with Lisa vander Pomp and Ken Todt, who.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Are so if you ever have a chance to go
out to dinner with Lisa vander Pump and Ken, go yes,
they're so charming, so charming and as opposed to mister Chows.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
They pick up the bill.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
They picked up the bill. They actually picked.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Up they did, and they're so fun. She's amazed.
Speaker 4 (04:01):
I didn't have to heimlick anyone and they picked up
a bill.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Look at that. We didn't have to choke a chicken.
You didn't have to fix a choker.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Okay, So that evening for me was a little more
complete because was outside. They were, they were, they talked
to us, they did, they did. I walk out and
they asked me, so, did mister Chows pick up a meal?
Speaker 4 (04:24):
The meal? And I go no, A Lisa Vanner Pump did.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
And there we go.
Speaker 4 (04:28):
By the way, I.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Got called last night, yeah by Richard Marks, Yes, who
was at mister Chows last night with Rod Stewart.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Stewart and he goes.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Hey, dude, check this out and go what he goes.
So I'm having dinner with Rod Stewart. They picked up
our meal and I didn't have to heimlick anyone.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
It was someone else in the restaurant picked up their meal.
Speaker 4 (04:52):
Well their effort, yeah, I said, right.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
So, so Richard was you know, I had had a
few martinis and called to say.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
Dude, I didn't have to him like Atty one.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
I thought that was funny. Was teasing me. I don't
have to say any lives and our real will take.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
That was funny. Here's cute.
Speaker 4 (05:09):
You love that?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Also in couples, we don't know this couple that I'm
about to talk about, but this is a little shocking.
We I just heard that Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban
aren't separating.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
Which you know is a serious bummer.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
I mean, look, whenever people are divorcing, it's it's sad,
especially when there's kids involved.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
But it's like you want to hold out hope that.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
These couples that you put on this pedestal have really
found true love and they're gonna be together forever. But
it does make you wonder, I mean, is that why
Nicole Kidman is on forty seven television shows.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
She just does never all.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Maybe that's why they're separating because they're never together.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
How can they be together.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
He's on tour, she does a million TV shows and movies.
They are never together.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Well, I mean, I bet the same is true if
Tim McGraw and Faith Hill and there's together and just
posted lovely things about each other.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
You know, it's where it's like, you know, when you
hear someone your age.
Speaker 4 (06:08):
Dying dying, you go, oh, you know.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
What are you saying? You listen to them getting separated,
and you go, oh, you want to hear them what
you say it?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Well, you want to hear people that have long, successful,
happy marriages stay together, just like you want to hear
people who your age are living right, it's the.
Speaker 4 (06:26):
Death of them.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
You want healthy people our age, and you want long
term couples to go the distance.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Sort of comforting to think that Keith Urban is on
a world long tour, Nicole Kidman is on multiple and
they're just why it.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
Didn't work, and that's why they get it.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
You and I are together all the time. We're together
all the time, and you were mad at me last week,
the whole week, the whole week, the whole week, Yes.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Mad at me, the whole week.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Which is a really good segue for what I wanted
to talk about today, which is the sleep divorce, not
the divorce divorce. Yes, it's a controversial thing, the sleep divorce.
We've talked about this before. Yes, so, a sleep divorce
is when partners choose to sleep in separate beds or
at bedrooms on a regular basis to improve their sleep quality.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
Yes, you're a fan. I know you are.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
You and I could definitely do that. I'll tell you why.
One is we spend so much time together.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
He's really harping on that.
Speaker 4 (07:24):
No, no, no, no, that we don't need to like
sleep in this this.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Week, we did not spend a lot of time together.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
Yeah, you were not happy with me. No, you barely
spoke to me.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
No.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
True, Yet we slept in the same bed also true. Yes,
but except for one.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Night, Except for one night, the night of question.
Speaker 4 (07:46):
Yes, you're so mad at me. I slept upstairs.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
We slept separately. Yes, not the sexy Time apartment that night. No,
the sleepy Time apartment.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
Right, so, but you and I I mean, look, I
think a couple.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
They have separate they work separately, which we do, but
I mean they don't spend as much time together. Maybe
that's their time to hang and watch TV.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
Right, some people watch TV in bed.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
They talk about but do you have any friends that
don't sleep in the same bed or room?
Speaker 4 (08:18):
I do, well, the ones I've had do that are
now divorced. Right. That was like, that's a precursor, that's
the concern.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Is that a precursor where Keith and Nicole sleeping in
separate rooms?
Speaker 4 (08:32):
This is probably not on the countries.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Yeah, separate?
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Yeah, no, I mean you want to know what I
think about it? Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
I think there's a couple of issues. One is, here's
the question. Do I sleep better when you and I
are not sleeping in the same bed? Yes, definitely. Do
you sleep better when I'm not sleeping in the bed
with you?
Speaker 3 (08:52):
It depends.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
It depends because look, you snore and I have to.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
Push you then, and you're if you're a little bit
of a bed pig. If I can be honest with you.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
What that you by the way, that is so not true.
I sleep in one position.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
You hogcovers the bedpig.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Oh so. But also there's something really weird about our bed.
I don't know why this is.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
I know what it is.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
You know, the main.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
Duvet gets pulled, no, no, no, for some reason slides forward.
It's almost like our bed is on a slant. It
goes down.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
I have a theory about why that happens why. I
think the afterlife is pulling it down.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
It's pulling us into the hell into hell.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
No, I think it's coming in and we're renting that apartment.
Someone clearly died in that apartment, and the after life
is pulling our covers off.
Speaker 3 (09:44):
Okay, great, we just like to sleep in the room.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
I'm gonna freak you out or anything, and now I'll
be sleeping upstairs.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
You got your what you wanted sleep divorce, don check.
Speaker 4 (09:56):
No.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
I think, to be honest, I think that happens because
of the way the bed, the cheats, the things, you
know that they're tucked in in that corner.
Speaker 3 (10:04):
Following the talk.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
I think, as we.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
He's kicking with his legs, that it it that stays
and it displaces in that direction.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
I don't know. Here's the other thing.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
It's kind of like capsular contraction of the breast, okay,
with superior displaying there's two other.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Problems right now.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
There's too many sheet at too much sheet at the
top of the bed. So you know when you have
a flat sheet and you fold it over, you know
what I'm talking about, and you make a little fold
over and then you tucket it. But the fold over
is so long that there's too many sheets up by
your neck and not enough at the bottom. And then
(10:46):
we like the room to be icy cold snowing. And
then with two fans, with two fans blowing and an
electric blanket. But I have a dual electric blanket, so
my side is on high.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
In his side his off, so my hot blanket butt.
Here's the problem. Really a bed pig. He wants a piece.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Of my hot blanket. He wants a leg on the
hot blanket side. Yeah, yeah, And then he starts slowly
pulling my hot side, so there's like too much sheet
at the top, and then the hot side's now going
to the left, and apparently the afterlife is pulling the
duvet down the front.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
It's not good, truth be told. I'm a terrible sleeper.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Yep, he's up all night with his Although the best
thing that's ever happened to my sleep is the screen protector,
the privacy screen protector where you can't see the screen
from the side. So now I don't get the glaring
light in my face.
Speaker 4 (11:48):
You don't tell me to turn it off anymore.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Yeah, so that's great. And I wear a mask.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Now I'm a terrible sleeper. And and of course I
checked news in the middle of the night.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
And when you're a little heavy or you had an
extra martini, there's like some snoring, sleep apnea.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
Oh I'm not you're telling you.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I said, either of those things are on the list
for sleep apna and that. And then he's on his
back and I'm like, oh my god. So I just
slightly shove and then nothing. Then I slightly poked, and
finally I go turned off.
Speaker 4 (12:29):
You know, I'm not that.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
I don't know if people of the audience, most of
them are probably too old to know this movie Reversal
of Fortune, you and are not that far from Klaus
and whatever.
Speaker 5 (12:39):
Fun view She wanted it so cold in the room,
whose breath cold in the room, and the windows were
always open, and he had.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
On like a ski cap and a mask and a
scarf fits us.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Yeah, we wear a mask, love it. Yeah, Yeah, we're
freak sleeps. We were we like to sleep this or
back to the sleep we sleep. We don't sleep that
well together, right, we sleep better apart.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
So first sleep, and I get nervous. I will say this,
like if.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
I wake up in the middle of the night on
the very odd amount of times that we're not sleeping
together for whatever reason, the one's traveling, whatever it is, Like,
I get nervous in the middle of nite, I wake
up and you're not there.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
When I wake up and you're not there, I'm obviously
because you sleep like you're a vampire.
Speaker 4 (13:28):
You don't move at all.
Speaker 3 (13:30):
I know. That's why I'm not a bed pig.
Speaker 5 (13:32):
I don't.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
You don't move, you don't make any noises.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
No, I'm very quiet, And I say in one spot.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Yeah, you like a vampire. Last few months assuring I've
talked a little bit. I talk.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
Do I say anything interesting?
Speaker 4 (13:45):
No? No, well I don't.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
I'll tell you why.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
That's because the reunion's coming up. I'm arguing, Yeah, that's
exactly what that is. People ask if I prepare for
the reunion. No, but apparently in my sleep I am preparing. No,
I don't prepare, but you know, at night those kinds
of things weigh on me.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
When I wake up and you're not there, I'm very concerned.
You're either sick or you're mad at me, And I'll
be perfectly honest with you, I'm mad at me.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
No, thanks, great, because that is your issue, not mine.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
Kidding because why would my doctor husband take care of
me when I'm sick.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
Well, many of you are married to or have parents
or parents or children of doctors.
Speaker 4 (14:36):
They don't care. I just don't care. I'm going to
be perfectly The question is.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Does a sleep divorce mean less intimacy?
Speaker 1 (14:44):
I mean, we're kind of joking, kind of not like, yes,
there's definitely would we sleep Does a person sleep.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
Better on their own? Probably? I mean, no question, you
could sleep on your own.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
And it's also so odd because I think about the kids,
about how we have these children and we.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
We have to tell them how they have to sleep alone.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
It's like a big deal, like you have to be
a big kid and you have to learn to sleep alone.
And then they spend several years sleeping by themselves, only
to go out and find a partner that they are
then forced to sleep with for the rest of their hush,
which is so crazy. So okay, so people have normalized
sleep divorce people.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I mean, I do know I have friends that do this.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
Maybe two really, Yeah, it's weird.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
I don't want to out them step in separate rooms.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
One does yep, slept No two both too.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
I mean they seem to. But who knew. I thought
Nicole and Keith was fine. Not that I know them,
but you know what I mean. Anyway, they seem to
have very good marriages.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
But they like my friend will even say, well, she's
talked about it on the show before, Liz Astrof. Liz
will say when she's talking about their house whatever, she'll
be like, so, you know, he'll come into my room
and I'm like, your room. She's like, yeah, that's my room.
He has his own room down the hall. Yeah, so
(16:12):
they have. I mean, it must lead to a lot
of good fodder. She's a comedy writer. But I think
for some people it really works and they have intimacy times.
And some people watch television and bed together and then
split up, so they've managed to figure it out. The
(16:32):
thing about us is we don't watch TV in bed.
I don't even know why we have a TV in
our bedroom.
Speaker 4 (16:38):
I don't think we ever need one. Ever, I do
sometimes to enjoy that together.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Sometimes when you're out, I will watch something in the bed,
but rarely because I don't like eating in bed.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
It's gross.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
Yeah, if we're up to me, yes, I would always
have an animal in bed, not me, always preferably a cat.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
Yeah. Can I tell the cat story?
Speaker 4 (17:01):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (17:01):
So when Terry and I were first dating, he had
this really sweet little.
Speaker 4 (17:05):
Cat, and so I adopted at age fourteen.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
By the way, yeah, he's very sweet.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
That's one of the reasons. By the way, I think
I've been so lucky in.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Life because you adopted.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
You adopt an animal. I'm convinced you get thirteen years
of good luck. If you adopt an animal in the
back half of their life or the back thirty your life,
you get like twenty years of good life.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
So we only have how many for the dogs?
Speaker 2 (17:26):
I still think I'm working all the dogs we rescued too,
nearly four so we have nine years left. But I
still get the snuggie the cat one.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
Oh you got double?
Speaker 4 (17:37):
What did? He lasts? Three years? Not long? Devastated me
and he still upset so.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
We So when I met Terry, he lived in this
environment with this eighties furniture. He had a black leather
scratched from the cat, black leather sectional. He had a
monolith television, because back in those days.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
TVs were huge, like a picture a huge armoire. That's
the TV. It's not like a TV in it or more.
It's a huge, huge thing.
Speaker 4 (18:11):
It came with massive speakers here with it.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
And then in the bedroom he had this black blacker,
low platform bed with built in end tables.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Yes, idios, but I digress.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
And I had a huge cat pull.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
That was all he had.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
So we would be sleeping in the bed and the
cat would come on the bed and whatever. And one
night we are in the bed and we're sort of
snuggling and he's got his hand around me and he
might be trying to get busy a little bit and
whatever with the right hand, and I'm doing right and
(18:54):
then and then all of a sudden, I go, where's.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Your left hand?
Speaker 4 (18:58):
Left hands?
Speaker 3 (18:59):
Here's left hand is petting the cat.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
No, no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
I mean not to make a pussy joke, but to
kind of get the jest.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Let me tell you the accurate geometry of that situation.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
One right handed you were on my mind, left.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Right side okay, arm was around, maybe honking a little bit.
The uh you know, the right hand was working. This
was working you a little bit. And then the shape
I just explained it. Hold on, you missed part of
the geometry. The schnuggy, okay, is wrapped around my neck
(19:35):
like this there his butt is here on your side,
wrapped her buttontail here.
Speaker 4 (19:42):
And wrapped her the head right next to my cheek.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
So I'm kissing schnuggy, scratching the shnuggy or working you.
Speaker 4 (19:55):
Now you know, it's like heaven.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
Now you know why there's no animal.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
But it was like, okay, I think we get it,
thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:06):
Maybe we do need a sleep divorce.
Speaker 4 (20:08):
And he's one last thing. He's fully murdering. But you
have no idea because it's over here left ear. You're like,
where's your little had set?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
I feel you go like this, You go where's your
and bunk and you feel sh huggy and you put
an end to it.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
Yes, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
So people have different ideas about this whole sleep divorce
and what they do in the bed and what they
don't do in the bed. Oh well, first of all,
Nick Jonas, he says he thinks beds are for sleeping.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Only A lot of people feel this way.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
He doesn't sit on the bed, he doesn't eat on
the bed, he doesn't read a book in the better
watch TV. Actually, if Priyanka wants to watch TV in
the bed, she'll lie down.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
And he'll pull up a chair.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
What because he doesn't want to lie in the bed,
I don't know, but I sort of get that because
it kind of makes you feel like you're sick because
to me, like my core memory of watching TV in bed,
it's like you're sick and you're in bed and you're
watching TV.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
And I had a lot of in the old house. Yeah,
we had a lot of memory. It was so av
wired and so amazing with the separation and the base
down there.
Speaker 3 (21:21):
Yeah, that was a good TV watching the experience.
Speaker 4 (21:24):
It was like being in a theater.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
Would you say in.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
Our twenty nine years together that we are TV and
bed watchers or.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Now once TV became so accessible at least contented, we
don't tolerate not watching stuff that we like.
Speaker 4 (21:40):
So I so, like, you.
Speaker 2 (21:41):
Know, a woman will put on men know us from
housewives because they're forced to watch it because and then
they get into it and all of a sudden, they're
in right, that really doesn't happen anymore because we watch
most of our content on our phone, so I don't
sit there and watch stuff that I wouldn't normally.
Speaker 3 (21:59):
Watch the treadmill. I think I watch more TV on
the treadmill.
Speaker 4 (22:04):
I watch all my TV at treadmill or.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
On a plane. Yes, that's where I get. That's where
I do most of my watching.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
I have to say, we were just talking.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
Why were we talking about this?
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Like?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
What your favorite moment of the day with Ace last
night at dinner is that when we were talking about this,
your favorite moment of the day?
Speaker 4 (22:26):
Oh, I said, I was, you know, what's your favorite? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (22:31):
What your favorite time of the week is, Like I
was saying, expecting to say, Saturday morning at nine o'clock,
when you wake up and you realize you don't have
to go to school, you just lie, you know, you go, oh,
this is so nice. I still have Sunday, I don't
have to do anything.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
It's that feeling, that emotional relaxation and physical relaxation. And
I was saying, my favorite moment like that is when
I walk in the room and it's you know, snowing
and fans are blowing and the blankets on high and
sheets are like clean and perfect, and you just slip
in and.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
It's warm and it's freezing out the oughts.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
Because I love that moment so much, I don't want
to sit in the bed and watch TV and like
then get up and go brush my teeth and come
back like it. But it also ruins that moment. I
want that.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
I want that sleepy time, I'm ready moment. I love that. Okay,
so that's what Nick Jonas thinks.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
But then I saw this Matthew McConaughey and his wife Camilla,
he got a smaller bed. They had a king size
bed and he got a smaller Queen size because he
said it was too big and they weren't touching it.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
I remember you.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
And I once had a bed that was huge and
it was so do you remember this.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
It was gigantic.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
I don't know what, but I thought, we always get
a California King but this one, for some reason, was
so big.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
We were far apart. Yeah, weird.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
It was weird.
Speaker 4 (23:57):
It was like we weren't sleeping in the same bed. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
And by the way, the Lucy Ricky thing is nonsense,
because you could still hear them snore.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
When I'm sleeping. I don't want to feel anybody next
to me because.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
I don't want to feel me next to you when
you're sleeping. No, yeah, he sticks his leg up me.
Speaker 3 (24:11):
I just want you to.
Speaker 4 (24:12):
Know, yeah I do.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
But the problem is I get very you know, I
get very warm. So even when I like, sometimes i'll
be I'll rub your back to sleep, you know, rubbing
on you, rubbing on your rubbing and I'm thinking she's sleeping.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Come on, That's how I used to feel with the babies.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
And then and then I'll stop to see whether you
do anything, and I'll go, oh, maybe she's asleep. And
then i'll just so you won't think that it's over. Necessarily,
i'll keep a forearm on your back that even gets
too hot for me, really yeah, I have to fully
take it off, and I don't.
Speaker 4 (24:48):
And then if I yeah, it's usually me usually cuddle up.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
You want to You say to me you want to cuddle,
and I go after two seconds, I'm like, all right
to that too hot?
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yes, but we both get too hot of that electric blanket.
I'm hot, So I don't know. I think I am
in favor of sleep divorce.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
So what would be the perfect scenario for you? So
we go to bed, but it's like good night, if.
Speaker 4 (25:15):
You go, If you go, I'll stand there.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Okay, I stay in bed and I say, could you
please leave?
Speaker 3 (25:23):
Now do your business with me? Go and then what
would you want?
Speaker 1 (25:26):
You would want like like certain intimacy nights or those
would be planned, yes, me nights, and then you leave,
like every odd number will have sex and stay in
the bed.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
But afterwards you can go.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
You go, I go, you go, and I stay and.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
Uh, you just want to pass out.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
And then a cat comes in and comes up with
my pillow and excellent, Okay, basically like.
Speaker 4 (25:58):
When I met you, Yes, the good old days. What
about you? What's your ideal situation?
Speaker 1 (26:04):
To be honest, I don't agree with the sleep divorce.
I think that unless there's a real medical issue or something. Honestly,
I do believe in sometimes like you have to, like
if you needed to be up at three am or
something crazy, or you really you know, I hadn't been
(26:24):
feeling I don't know something like that. I get all that,
but I'll tell you what's important to me, and maybe
this resonates with you. I don't know, but there have
been many times, not just a handful, but many, many
times over almost.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
Three decades together where we have woke it up in the.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Middle of the night and have had incredibly important conversations
two three o'clock in the morning, and really intimate conversations
that have changed us as a couple, that have brought
(27:01):
us close to closer together, that have, you know, really
for me, I think been really life changing or just.
Speaker 3 (27:09):
Lovely.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
And I wouldn't give that part up.
Speaker 4 (27:14):
This may piss you off, but I'm going to go
for it.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Okay, I get in the bed, and as opposed to
some couples and some husbands, I do not pass gasson
from you.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
I am not a farmer.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
I have to say perfectly, so infrequent that when it
does happen.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
You make you call me out on it. It's a mistake, Okay,
you embarrass me. Okay, So is that.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
Funny to some people say that that you're not close?
You don't fart in front of me.
Speaker 4 (27:43):
I don't want you farting in front of me, thank you.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
I don't do things like that.
Speaker 4 (27:46):
No, I don't do that.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
So we and it's probably no surprise that Heather and
terry to Brodn fart in front of you. But having
said that, I'm in the bed and I feel, you know,
the cry of the imprisoned shit down there, okay, And
(28:09):
I think to myself, oh my god, I'm not falling
asleep unless something happens to this situation, this pressure down there.
I turn to go, hmm, I assess whether you're asleep,
and if you are asleep, how deeply asleep you might be,
and whether I can quote unquote.
Speaker 4 (28:28):
Get away with it in the bed.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
So I'll turn over and evaluate, hmmm, is she in
slow wave sleep or is she in superficial REM sleep?
Because I know that if I let one out and
it's too loud and you're in REM sleep, I'm waking
you up and you're gonna go ooh or something. Right,
So I won't get away with it. So sometimes I'll
go hmmm, and I'll give it a whirl. Nine times
(28:54):
you up. So I mean I will sit there uncomfortably
when I could have just farted and fallen back asleep instead.
Now I'm victimized by lower abdominal cold.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
So you want to fart? Divorce?
Speaker 2 (29:12):
You know what might help if we both were wore
those noise canceling headphones.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
I think it's so.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
Sad that you were not even moved by me saying
that those intimate conversations were so important to me and
like immediately launched into a fart story.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
That's for a certain percent of the audience who might
listen to this podcast, the mail percent, they will totally.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
Relate to that.
Speaker 1 (29:35):
Okay, so I should get the apartment. I just looked
at the apartment downstairs from us.
Speaker 4 (29:39):
Why so we get a sleep divorce.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
Oh, I think it might work now.
Speaker 4 (29:43):
By the way, we already have an apartment upstairs.
Speaker 1 (29:45):
No, but these are just one floor a part. It'll
be faster for you to go. We were so close
to making up, too.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
So sad.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
So what do you think our ideal nightly routine could
be so that we and avoid a sleep divorce but
actually get better sleep.
Speaker 3 (30:02):
Well, clearly you need to go fart before you get.
Speaker 4 (30:06):
In the bow. Wow, I can't believe you just said
that to me.
Speaker 3 (30:11):
I don't know you need gas X and no phone.
Speaker 4 (30:15):
That you know what?
Speaker 2 (30:16):
Okay, here's my major problem, and this is this would
not be fixed by a sleep divorce. I get up
to use the bathroom because I'm a sixty seven year
old guy with probably BPH and I have to pee two.
Speaker 4 (30:29):
Or three times a night, and so I'm really tired.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
And I wake up and I go, oh, I'm never
falling asleep because I probably have to pee.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
So I go pee. This is tea and my a relation.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
I go really past that part and I come back.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
I come back. I don't turn any lights on in
the bathroom. And I come back and I get into bed,
and I go, don't do it, don't do it, don't
do it, don't do it.
Speaker 4 (30:53):
Don't do it.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
And I grab my phone, and you know, I'm checking things.
And now now i'm fifty minutes I'm away because I'm
now checking things on the phone.
Speaker 3 (31:06):
I'm so much better at that. I don't look at
my phone.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
It's so good.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
Only time I pick up my phone in the middle
of the night, if something's going on with one of
the kids, it wakes me up, and they're on different coasts,
and I, you know, then i'll look.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
And the reason by the time, because it's amazing how
much comes out on a daily basis.
Speaker 4 (31:26):
That's just shocking in this country right now.
Speaker 3 (31:29):
What should we do?
Speaker 2 (31:31):
You know, the general rules that everyone sort of talks
about when it comes to sleep physiology is.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Don't touch your phone for an hour before bed that
But do you I mean, would you ever do that?
Because I have to say and I know this is
counterintuitive to what we just said, but for me, I
it's like the same thing as cleaning up you know,
your desk before you study or anything like that. Like
I ritual. I know, I like things to be in order.
(32:01):
So I you know, I check life three sixty and
I make sure all the kids are in their beds,
they're home right, and I look at what I have
to do tomorrow, and so I can kind.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
Of visualize my day.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
And knowing that it's organized and I'm prepped for the
next day relaxes me. Yeah, what could I do that
an hour before we went to bed?
Speaker 3 (32:26):
Probably?
Speaker 4 (32:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
Well, the one thing that we're better at is that
never discuss anything controversial anxiety producing when you first get
into bed. Now you're going to be wide awake. Oh yeah,
and don't argue when you get in bed now you're
wide awake. But the one thing, you know, I'm so
it lists as a callback to last week's financial podcast.
(32:54):
You know, I'm so locked into stocks and and now
I'm so obsessed with this artificial intelligence Fourth Industrial Revolution,
how things are changing that I can't you know What's
I mean. Our lives are going to change so dramatically
in the next two years. It's like it could happen
(33:15):
tomorrow that all of a sudden the robots released.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Okay, And on that note, I swear I'm going to
come home one day and he's going to be writing
a manifesto in chalk on the wall.
Speaker 4 (33:26):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
The good news is I won't be sleeping with him,
I don't think, because you'll be writing your manifesto in
chalk in your bedroom noise, I'll be in the other room.
Speaker 3 (33:38):
That's you know.
Speaker 4 (33:39):
I'm still mildly convinced this is not real anyway.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
A simulation, okay, And.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I'm working on the simulation every day how to make
things better for me in the world around me. So
just to all of you out there, if the better
things start to happen in this world, it's my I
did it for you, you can think.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
Thank you all so much for listening. Seriously, I really
do thank you that we release episodes every Wednesday at
four am Pacific and you can listen on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.