March 31, 2025 • 63 mins
This week your BFF's are joined by Marie-Adélina (Loveable Trans Auntie) to talk all things trans joy, visibility and why we need to uplift the trans community now more than ever. We also dabble into Jordan's Taco Bell obsession.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Black Fat FELM Podcast is a production of iHeart
Radio and Doctor Jean Paul LLC. But hey, everyone, welcome
to an extra special episode of the blackfeft FIM Podcast
where all the intersections of identity are celebrated. My name
is John, also known as doctor John Paul, and I
don't know about you, but nothing in this world has
(00:20):
felt the same emphasis. Snapple changed their bottle from glass
to plastic. What what is what? What is life? Why
are we? Chris? Can you put some church music over this?
Speaker 2 (00:32):
So?
Speaker 1 (00:32):
This is this is him? You know about my testimony,
You know I said that there was there was an age.
You know this, this is gonna rage me.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
There was a time.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
Do you remember when you can get a nice cold
snapper in that glass bottle on a nice so cow
spring day. You know, Mama had her food stamps, fridge
was full, and you just knew somehow, some way that
things was gonna be okay, all from that glass of snap.
Now they put them in a plastic bottle, and it's
just it doesn't hit the same. I don't know, you know,
(01:05):
it just it's something about it just don't hit the same.
And now look at us fighting over eggs toilet tissue
and all right, my god, what a moment. That is
least pleasing to me. But how are you, queen Jojo?
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Least pleasing is exactly the word I use my sister.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Jod to me.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
And I miss the compensation on that glass bottle and
it comes out, and it comes out.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
The fridge is in sunlight, and she sweats a little bit,
and absolutely hear little chrisp.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
Okay, can't wait at that bottle with just pop? Yes, God,
met mcclinch, met mclench. Okay, that that.
Speaker 5 (01:53):
Was my poppers.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Okay, that was real. Yea love nothing.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
But y'all, it is your girl Jordan or Joho in
nasty Ashui reverses Joho Jordan nasty Yes. And I just
I just want to say, I mess the lost buffalo
of reasons because arguably is it not better for the
environment to take I have conviews all let's talk about
climate change, and y'all want to give us plastive bottles.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
I thought we wanted to save our earth. What are
we doing?
Speaker 1 (02:19):
Don't nobody care about this damn earth?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I mean?
Speaker 1 (02:21):
And in turn, she ain't don't care about us. Watch
she gonna wipe us all off of this planet and
say start over, go, do not pass go.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Earth out here washing paradyce And it's like, yo, a girl,
that's a good idea of that, y'all.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
That one man circle for y'all, that's.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Exactly were gonna have. One of these days they're just
going to put a dome over us because we ain't
gonna be able to live. But anyway, uh, we still
love our Earth. Please make sure that you recycle. And
with that being said, this week we are ecited to
bring on a longtime friend and supporter of the show
to celebrate a day that we should be celebrating honestly
every day if you really want to keep bit a book.
(03:00):
But today we wanted to invite our lovable trans Auntie
to the stage to talk about love, life and identity. Honey.
She is a community editor at Equal Pride, publisher of
The Advocate, out Out, Traveler Plus and Pride dot com.
So when you see all of those really cute articles
coming down your timeline, nine times out of ten, this guest,
(03:21):
I was gonna say your name, child, because I'm not
done much you introduction. Yeah, let me pause before I
jump ahead. Nine times out of ten she has been
the one who has vetted these stories. And I also
want to shout out that she was one of the
first people to say yes to me to doing a
story on my book, and so I'm forever grateful for
her and all that she does. She is a Haitian
(03:42):
American trans woman whorely tirelessly champions voices from the LGBTQ
community while creating a vibrant community engagement approach that infuses
each story with the dynamic, innovative spirit perspective. And what
I will say to her spirit. I've met her several
times in person, and her spirit is just so warm
(04:03):
and so loving. I truly cannot say more than this,
Thank you, Marie Adelina for being with us today. How
are you.
Speaker 5 (04:11):
I am doing so well. Thank you so much. That
is a great introduction. And na, I'm not trying to cry.
I just had a hormone shot and you know, all
the emotions.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Naha, the emotions are moving. Yeah, I understand, I understand.
But we love you and we thank you for all
that you do and we are so grateful that you
were here for this special day. So for those of
you who are listening, yes, you are listening to this
episode Day of trans Day of Visibility, and it is intentional.
We wanted to make sure that we uplift our sisters
and our dolls and we talk about something that is
(04:40):
wrapped in joy for y'all, because we do recognize that
right now there's not too many moments where we have
moments to sit in joy, and so right now we're
sitting in community, and I'm just really glad that you
actually could make it, make your schedule work for you
to be here, so I really appreciate it. But yeah,
we're gonna go ahead and jump right into our first segment.
So our first segment is still here, say is where
we kick off the show and we give our love
(05:02):
as you all know, to the to the great Tisha
Campbell and letting her know that yes we are still
I'm I'm still here here. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,
We're still here and we're gonna be here forever, regardless
of if you try to get rid of us. And
so I know we are celebrating t d o V.
And for those of you who like me, struggle with acronyms,
(05:24):
today is trans Day of Visibility and I wanted to
ask you both while I know we spend a lot
of time talking about being seen, wanting to be seen,
you know, representation, all these different things that we're constantly always,
you know, kind of in conversation around. I did want
to ask you how have you both dealt with being
visibly queer in a moment, specifically in spaces where you
(05:46):
know being visibly queer might put you in danger. And
so I'll start with mine, Marie will jump to you,
and then Joho will add in your thoughts. I'm laughing
because on our show flow it just says thoughts. I'm like,
I'm like, I know what that means. Whenever I see that,
I'm like, oh, Joe Hood's got something good to say.
(06:07):
So I did want to say, you know, I don't
want to keep harping on my book, which you all
can get anywhere and everywhere. Books are so like, if
you ain't got and if you can't do the book,
you can also do the audio.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Audio.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
It's alive and well and kicking as well. But I
know that there is a moment, you know, my team like,
I'm somebody. There's a couple of people around me who
is helping to kind of put this tour together. And
one person said I would love for you to go. Well,
we got an ask for me to go to Alabama.
There's two different places they're wanting me to go to Alabama,
(06:39):
And immediately when they brought that up to me, I
was like, my god, I don't know I feel about that,
because we all know Alabama is a very red place
and we've talked about it, right, navigating this world in
a very very what feels like a very red time,
and so yes, I know that there are people who
really need to quote unquote hear from me. But also
(06:59):
this shit is terrifying. The thought of being in a
state that I don't know, a place that I don't know,
and being my authentic self. It's just you know, you know,
there's a part of me that like I want to
pass on it, but I often feel really tired at
the end of the day of thinking of it and
feeling like I'm constantly having to live in this place
of a fear. So there's a part of me that's like, yes,
(07:20):
you know, yes girl, be worried, but also do the
thing like you still have work to do, and so yes,
I'm hyper alert. Yes I'm looking at you know, looking
at all the things to keep myself safe. But at
the same time, I'm recognizing that I can't change things
in this world if I don't actually show up for them.
So again, it's like Audrey Lord said, do it's scared, right,
(07:40):
We have to do things whether we're afraid or not,
we still have to do it scared. And so, you know,
I think the biggest thing for me is just recognizing,
like it may be scary, and yet there are going
to be things about being me that might be a
like that may make me afraid, but it's going to
instill life into someone else. And that's the reason why
I keep showing up authentic self. So Marie, I would
(08:02):
love to hear your perspective on that.
Speaker 5 (08:04):
You know, I every time I enter a space or
think about taking on something, I always remember the one
thing my grandfather taught me that fear can limit our
capacity to learn, fear can limit our capacity to love.
Fear is the greatest enemy of freedom, and never let
(08:24):
freedom take hold of your destiny. And I have always
been one of the whether I'm the only non white person,
the only trans person in spaces and places that are
often not open to us. So, you know, my friend
Tracy Gilcrest said like, you know, keep our holding space.
(08:45):
I know and learn and have learned to take it,
take up space. Yeah, never dim myself or shrink myself
for other people. I am proudly trans, I am proudly black,
And no one's going to me otherwise, No stop me
from living.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
I know that's right. And it's like and even if
and I say this too, and you know, and this
is something that's a reality for many of us. Right
even in death, I've been saying too, Like you may
try it, but even in death, I'm still gonna live. Right,
people are still gonna know me, They're gonna know my legacy,
They're gonna know what I've done on this earth. And
so as much as you try to get rid of me,
I'm still like, I'm still gonna be here. So I
(09:25):
love that you say that. Thank you for sharing that.
What about you, Joel?
Speaker 2 (09:28):
You know for me being queer?
Speaker 3 (09:31):
And I said this a lot on the show in life,
but like, being queer I think is the.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Most privilege I've ever had in my life.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Like I would, I love like, I love being queer
more than I love me anything, and like and like
like I love my blackness, I love my jewishness both
so much like they would be different if I wasn't queer, right,
But queerness is what makes it interesting for me and
exciting cool and to be these ethnic ethnic identities and
(10:03):
the race racial identities. But be queer is what makes
me feel powerful. And so I think when it comes
to how I deal with being this lequ in this
moment when the annoyment being queer might be in danger,
I'm in danger regardless, like I'm Unfortunately, I have not
had the privilege of not feeling endangered. Like nothing I
do in life that's not scenings right scene is endangering.
(10:26):
But I think, you know, you know, I can say
I've made the conscious choice to say I probably won't
travel to certain states for sure, not because I have
nothing to feel scared, because I just don't have to
deal with the bullshit, Like it's just not really worth
it you have to try and do the bullshit.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
But I think also, like.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
I I cannot control how people are, how people react
to me. I don't know people are going to react
to seeing a six foot, three hundred pounds dude.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
With you know, with with come like now know what's
happened when people see it?
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Right, like and so, I, but I can't concern myself
with worrying are they going to feel scared or nervous?
And truthfully like they like like, I, you know, I
really love what you said. I really love what you're
what your grandparents shared with you, because like like like
(11:21):
like like they're like, I don't want to let their
fear and disrupt my freedom. I cannot let their fear
challenge my freedom and make me feel I can't be free,
like I have the keys to my freedom.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
They do not.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
They do not get the power or the right to
try and usurp that, you know, like that power for me.
So I think so, So I was just saying, I think
the way I've dealt with it is recognizing my queer
is powerful, and they they wouldn't be scared of wasn't powerful, right,
they wouldn't be scared of some.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
Powerful fact that is very powerful. My queer is amazing.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
My queer is what connected with people, Like my comedy
around me is so queer. Yeah, Like I truly could
cry about how amazing my community is because it's queer.
And so I know that whatever I do, like, like,
my my back is God, by my family and by
you know, bye by by my higher.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Beings, right, like I know God, God knows my heart.
I don't know about anyone.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Else's heart, but my God, my Gods is no my heart.
And so I feel supremely like I just feel supreme.
I know it's a woogle ass response, but I think
the way the world I deal with it is like
it's like I know I'm blessing hally favored, Blessing hally favored.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
That's it. I was laughing because when you were talking
about being black, I was like, oh, bliming. I keep
thinking about that me and myself. When someone was like
being black is a little dangerous, but it's fun as hell,
and I'm like, yes, and then you's freaking some queerness
for razzle dazzle, and yes, bitch, like this ship is
(12:59):
really scary, but my god, isn't it fun.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Because it's it's probably to be like it's probably be
like like, oh, I get to do I get to
be part of the cultures that ever's trying to buy
all the time, Like y'all say on our y'all stand
as trying and buy our ship all the time.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Okay, the power we have.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Look at the material, Oh my.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Material like I had a it's funny because you say this,
and I know we have to go to commercial, but
I was laughing because I was talking to someone I
assume is strength and he was and he basically was like,
what's it giving? And I looked at him it was
like wait a second. Now, it was like wait a second,
(13:39):
and I was like nothing, trying to take our lingo right,
Like it's just that kind of ship where I'm like,
y'all want to be so bad y y'all hate us,
but y'all want to be a bass bitches.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Pick me as.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I live, all right, y'all. Well, with that being said,
now that we all have signed up for Mui Tai
kickbox and classes because if you know, you know, we
are going to take a short break and when we
come back, we are going to have more with our
lovable trans Antie back in a second.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
Okay, family, we are back, and this week for category
is we want to chat with our teachers discuss the
concept of visibility on trans Day of Visibility.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
So first I want to give you a.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Quick little heirstory lesson and then we'll pass to our
guest because it's not her job to tell y'all.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
I never would, I never, never was, never will be Okay.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
T d o B was founded by Rachel Crandall Crocker,
a psycho therapist and the exec director of Transgender Michigan
in two thousand and nine. The aims to subject their
lives and achievements of trans general expensive people, while also
raising awareness about the ongoing challengeeships just discrimination that auto
leads to death and murder that the transmunity faces. This
(14:59):
day celebrities idea that we are more than our pain.
The trans people collectively should be and need to be
held in hyb regards for all that they have done
to continue to do, and my and my ad celebrated
for just existing in a world that does not want
them to exist like like like I also I also
want to do with the idea that transfers have to
like do something for the for the world be simply
(15:21):
existing is enough. And then to me, TRANSISI also celebrates
that too. So before we get into the fun, our
dear guest, Marie Marie uh Adelina, is it like so?
Am I pronouncing it correctly?
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Are we pronouncing it right?
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Okay, okay, Just.
Speaker 3 (15:40):
About what transat visibility has meant for you and why
why we should not why we should tell them at
all the time, not just on March thirty.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
First, you know.
Speaker 5 (15:49):
Being visible means rooting and grounding yourself in self love,
and it's it's something hope Giselle, because I interviewed her
or an article and she said, we we have to
learn to love ourselves in our body and our skins,
and love ourselves so hard that it feels selfish. Yeah,
(16:12):
And visibility means and I'm I know with uh. The
for the trans community, we've adopted like the butterfly as
like a representation, and visibility is the ability to just
spread your wings and fly high because for so many
of us where we're often told to like stay in
(16:36):
in the closet or to hide ourselves, but there's no
need to be in that crysalice. Just spread your wings
and fly high. And that's what visibility means for me.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Mm spread your wings and fly, but you will become
a butterfly, oh whole fly. Okay, I have to stop
sing it before we get sued, But my god, my god,
I was feeling that I was literally sitting here shaking
my hands because I felt every word that you said,
My God, what a moment. I love this response because
(17:12):
you know, for years I've said that I feel like
the world and the community too only looks at black
trans people when something terrible happens. And I feel like
visibility is not just about the idea of like, what
what what's happening on the I would say, the front
side of of the of the pain, right, I really
think that we really need to I'll say this from
(17:35):
you know, from what I know and what I've seen,
trans specifically black trans women are usually at the helm,
right at the front of every single massive major change
that we have in this country, in this world, and
and I think we need to start really celebrate. And
that's the reason why I think for me, you know,
I'm recognizing and I'm starting to to really love the
(17:56):
idea that I do have a lot of strong connection
and deep connections with black trans women who I don't
necessarily look at as oh I have to learn from them,
because that's not what it is. It's the respect factor, right,
It's this idea of how do I how do I
watch you move? How do I watch you navigate systems
that are even oppressing me as a cis gender non
(18:18):
binary person and find my voice through that. And so
when you talk about this idea of of of being
able to fly, it just means it means so much
to me, and so I I just I just love
our community so much. I did want to ask you know,
I'm I'm really happy that in recent years it feels
like trans people, specifically black trans women, have made today
(18:40):
feel more like a call to talk about right and
really thinking about how we how we discuss like how
do we have a true discussion about the privilege of
things we don't have to think about versus the things
that we do right. And I think that's the thing
for me that I really hold around this day is
how many times I've heard Angela Carross and I've heard
(19:02):
Dominique Morgan, and I've heard a lot of other trans
girls talk about that right, Like even Marsha P. Johnson.
That was her Her whole staple was give me my
fucking rights. I deserve my rights. And so I wanted
to ask you, right, as we think about this, you know,
as we think about visibility, who are some of the
folks who inspire our Auntie when it comes to being
(19:23):
so comfortable, you know, cozy in your skin.
Speaker 5 (19:27):
You know, the person that inspires me the most is
my own lovable chance Auntie I grew.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
I read that article. Yeah, I read that.
Speaker 5 (19:38):
And Kiki we were like there was only like a
four year difference, so she was more like an older
sister yea, And she came into herself in like ninety
nine two thousand in that era, So this is like
way before we had all the discussions about trans rights
(20:00):
in a more public sphere and being a black trans
woman then and navigating the world then. No matter what
and how she was treated, she still kept moving forward.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
She still.
Speaker 5 (20:15):
Remained comfortable in her skin. And she's the one that
just inspires me the most and the one that there's
not a day that I don't think about her. Unfortunately,
she did pass away by twenty thirteen, but she is
the one that I think about always.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
And you know what we're gonna do. I'm gonna link
that story to our show notes because I think it's
a really beautiful The baby pictures got me. It was like, oh,
like it like, yeah, my throat thug tear right, a
thug tear came down. But I think I think it's
so important to see, Like I think why I love
that story so much, and why I want folks to
(21:00):
read it is because we're seeing I've been saying a lot,
like I believe that my transcestors is why I'm still
here and why I'm doing what I get to do.
And it's really cool to be able to see a
transistor uplift you in the way and then seeing you
do what you do and for not even us as
the as a podcast to give you flowers, but also
like being able to to to know that there are
(21:20):
people who are reading this and are being inspired by
not only you, but also you know Kiki and you
know in this life. So now I'll get to think
of Kiki as a transistor and it really makes me happy.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
So that's so beautiful here, And I really I really
appreciate you so not so much.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
And I want to say also, I love I love
love of so much like the name lovable trans Auntie,
cause I think that's just like really really it just
feels really special because I feel like everyone wants to
be in the Auntie era right now, like everyone loves Aunties.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Everyone wants everything, no one want, no one wants.
Speaker 3 (21:50):
No one want wants me a parent, they want they
want to be a one's ontie and I love much
and so being like glebal.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
Trans is so special.
Speaker 6 (21:58):
I will not your mama, but I'll be okay listen
like yeah, and so I know I love you to
talk a little bit about the idea of like of
like why the name right?
Speaker 2 (22:11):
And also.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Why like like like why folks, why folks need to
be listening to a loveable transfer family members, even like
even if sometimes people may not love like love them
in that moment. And and I'm asking us, especially especially
after reading you know, I read your article about when
you mentioned when after Sam's murder that the ceilings may
(22:38):
have also identified with with it, may not may have
also identified within the community, and you post a question
of like like why why is me that we've that
transports have built the one that's also killing us too?
Speaker 2 (22:49):
So I would love to, you know, make sure that's
on there as well.
Speaker 5 (22:52):
You know. I I think when we tell our glories,
we humanize an experience that is otherwise being politicized. You know,
when you there's a big difference between reading us reading
(23:12):
an article or reading a report about trans violence and
anti trans bills, but when you read someone's story or
sit and listen to someone's stories. We're humanizing the experience.
We're humanizing something that a lot of people just don't
(23:33):
conceptualize or don't truly understand. And I think the power
of storytelling allows us to get so many things across.
You know, it's easier to tell a story and someone
take it to heart than to read a report or
to read it, you know, to read a an article,
(23:55):
because it doesn't sound newsy, it sounds personal, it sounds
in we're letting you in rather than you just reading
it a surface level.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Yeah, I again, and that I think that's the reason
why I think is so imperative. So I mean, I know,
not to take the light away from you, but I
think it's it made me so joyful, like thinking about
the I think it's the Trans Journalism Association, right that
we now have Travell, who is the executive director of
(24:29):
It's it's great that we have not only just the organization,
but we have trans people like Trevelle leading it because
to a degree, it's it's it's really allowing us to
allow trans people to tell their stories the way that
they want to tell their stories. And I think that,
for me is what is most important it's because again,
you know, that's one of the things I've been saying,
(24:50):
even too in my own journey. I've said, I want
to make sure that if something does ever happen to me,
that I leave behind my story. Right. I don't want
I don't want someone to pick and choose how they
get to show me in the light of the world. Right,
I'm putting all this shit out here, and if you
like it, great, and if you don't, that's okay too.
But I think it is so imperative that we let
(25:11):
trans people tell their own stories. So again, I know
that you're a journalist, and I'm just I'm so grateful
and thankful that I know that you're the one that
gets to see these stories and and kind of and
kind of handle them.
Speaker 5 (25:21):
And I don't really consider myself a journalist. I consider
myself a storyteller. Storytelling is very different from journalism. I mean,
I know, on facebool you it looks like I'm a journalist,
but I'm a storyteller. I am a curator, a purveyor
of stories.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Okay, she is, Okay, But I was also going to say,
I'm going to live in the James Baldwin and I'm
gonna say you can be both, because I truly believe
that storytelling is a part of journalism, and as someone
who has has roots of journalism in their degree, I
hear what you're saying. But at the same time, I
(25:59):
still want to give you your credit because you're out
here finding these stories. You're out here, you know, putting
these stories together, and you're and you're remembering people in
the process. So I want to give credit with that. Yeah,
I'm gonna give Yes, you are.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
We're showing you are lobal trons one receive the love.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yes, she's an icon. Is the moment come on now? Yes?
One thing when you got right? Okay, So I'm gonna
ask you this. Uh you know, I I think since
we're celebrating not only just your accomplishments, but trans accomplishments
across the board, I would love to know, like, what's
(26:41):
something that you think about in your own lived experience
or even in terms of just overall transvisibility and you
go yes, bitch, Like, what's that thing that makes you
say yes when you think about transvisibility?
Speaker 5 (26:54):
You know for so long well I can't say for
so long, but especially in in the early you're part
of my journey. I didn't see a lot of people
in the room that looked like me or lived in
my experience. And there was a moment a few years
ago when we attended the Black Queer Creative Summit and
(27:16):
seeing black trans women who are just making it, who
are creating the content, who are doing the damn thing,
and that that was definitely a moment that I was like, Yes,
we are here, we are doing it, we are surviving
and thriving, and it's it's just seeing us in spaces
and places where for so long we weren't allowed back
(27:38):
in mm hmm, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
I love that.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
So I have So I just have one more more
question for the physicateagraph for you, just because like you know,
like we're like, we're just on the topic of topic
of joy because there's so much shit happening right now.
But the thing that we love about the translavtability is
that as centers center's joy, like in concept and in practice.
And so I want to ask you, how have you
(28:05):
centered joy around your your lived experience, both in and
out of this moment, And what if I can you
give to two other trans folks who maybe are struggling
to find joy themselves m m.
Speaker 5 (28:21):
Dang, that's a hard question. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
You're fine, you said, Beyonce, what are my aspirations? You know?
Speaker 5 (28:42):
It's joy m hm trans Joy takes time.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Mm hmm. Chance, Wait a minute, hold on now, go
go ahead, go take me to church.
Speaker 5 (28:55):
It takes time. I mean, it's not I've been on this,
in this second part of my trans journey for almost
a decade now, and it's only recently that I felt
that I have like, truly, truly, truly felt comfortable in
my body and my skin, and especially in this time
in this country. It's it seems wild that, you know,
(29:19):
I would feel joyful. Joy takes time. Joy doesn't have
to look like a big celebration. Joy can be just
taking care of yourself. Joy can be going out on
a weekend and just like being seen in a space,
(29:42):
joy does take time.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
I don't know where I was going with that, but yes,
I'm so sorry, a big gas word. No, I mean work.
I just literally went back and titled the episode joy
takes time. And I think that that's something that I've
never hurt anyone put into perspective. I mean it, I mean,
because people think you're a meat like We're such a
(30:06):
people of immediate gratification, and I think that people imaginedly
like automatically think, well, once I transition or once I
once I come out, quote unquote, my life will be grand.
Everything will be great. And it's like, no, there're still hurdles,
and there's still things you're gonna have to deal with,
and you may even have more hurdles, but I can
guarantee you that you're gonna get to a place after
(30:27):
those hurdles. Like I'm almost forty. I'll be forty in
three months. And I have never been as happy in
this body as I have been, you know, And it
took me thirty nine years to get to this place
where I'm happy in this body. Right, But so I
love that you say that, because I have never heard
I've thought it, but I've never heard anyone frame it
in that way. So thank you for saying that.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
All Right, y'all, now that we have our listeners out here,
we've in translaves everywhere. We got to take a quick
break to pay Uncle scam because he's scammed us in
these streets.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
And women come back. We will have a little bit
more time with our level trons. Auntie more and just
a bit y'all.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
All right, y'all, we are back and black. This week,
we are picking up the go Love Yourself segment. We
haven't been here for a minute, and so, keeping with
the theme of trans day of Visibility, I wanted to
ask both my sisters and our new auntie a good,
you know, a good question that makes us feel a
little warm and fuzzy on the inside. I'd love to
(31:35):
ask you kind of keeping in this frame of joy,
I you know, we touched on it in our last segment.
I think it's imperative that we ask this question and
we kind of reflect on this question often now because
I think there's so much for us, Like all the
shit is heavy, and there's just so every day it
feels like there's something else that we're having to like
navigate and we're having to deal with. And so I
(31:55):
would really love to like ask you both what makes
you happy to be who you are, whether it be
non binary, trans, all of the across the board in
a moment where it feels like folks are trying to
kind of make you question it and think I want
to differentiate this question because we were talking earlier about
safety and so it may sound like we're asking the
(32:16):
same question, but we're not. We're talking about the idea
of how do you keep showing up for yourself even
in moments when you're not safe? And now we're asking
the question right like, what makes you happy to be
who you are in a time when folks are trying
to make you question that? And so I think, for me,
I'll go and then I'll ask you, Marietelina, and then
(32:37):
Joho will throw it to you. I know, for me,
I think about this a lot because while I'm like
thinking about my safety and I'm thinking about all of
the moments where I'm like, ooh, I may not want
to go over there, I may not this little little
sketchy I think what also makes me so happy to
be so outwardly non binary and blackly fatly non binary,
is this idea of knowing that I'm a free ask motherfucker.
(33:00):
I'm just free and there's really not too much that
people can do to make me go back inside of myself.
And I'm sure you all know what that means. Right
the moments where you like second guess something about yourself,
you know, or you may feel like you're flipping your
role and you're having to play being someone you're not.
I just I'm just in a place now where I
don't let niggas live in my head. Rent Free, I'm like,
(33:23):
if you're gonna be in my head, oh, trust me,
you've got to have a reason to be there. You've
got to have a reason to be up in my head.
If it really makes that, that means you're paying bills.
That means you're helping me get these student loans paid off.
That means that you're helping me find new gigs like
I don't when I go upstairs and I turn on
my Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the last thing I'm
(33:44):
thinking about is what the world thinks about me. That
makes me just feel really good, right from my nails,
to my clothes to my makeup, which I'm learning how
to do. I did my makeup yesterday for the Glad
Honor Awards, and I got complimented on it, and I
was like, Oh.
Speaker 7 (34:00):
She's learning learning, she's learning how to do her eyebrows,
she's learning how to put on a little bit. She's
learning that you do concealer after you do the makeup.
Speaker 1 (34:13):
My god, my god. I used to think it was
concealer first, but it's not you put your primer on,
you do your makeup, then you do your concealer, and
you right just learning. I'm just it's a quick tutorial,
mother's learning. What about you, Marietta Lina.
Speaker 5 (34:31):
You know it's it's calling out the bullshit and owning
it and calling out the bullshit when others may be
afraid of you doing it. I just recently was kind
of and it's kind of leading me to an my
next article on coming out as trans in the workplace.
(34:55):
But I when I came out and and I was
in like the nonprofit world, I was working at a
museum and at an orchestra, and I thought like coming
out in the art gallery was going to be amazing
and fun and people are going to be accepting. But
there were microaggressions. Amen, well many micro aggressions to the
(35:18):
point that I quit. And this was a space that
I loved. This was a space I was going to
go back to school and earn another master's.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (35:29):
So recently I called them out on their bullshit because apparently,
almost a decade later, they're still being mind phone petty.
So I put up a video and I basically said
there's a petty bitch who's still in her petty job
in her small petty world. And my mother called me
(35:54):
and she was like, are you okay.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
I was like yeah.
Speaker 5 (35:59):
She's like yeah, video, I don't think. I don't know
if that's a good idea. And I'm like, mom, sometimes
you got to burn bridges. Sometimes there are bridges that
you don't cross anymore.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
Amen, your way.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
Some bridges got trollssner them. You got you got to
trolls to amen.
Speaker 5 (36:18):
And sometimes those bridges don't wait like they used to. Brown.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Some of the bitches are wooden.
Speaker 5 (36:26):
So I called them out and I said, you know what,
thank you. I'm thank you to the Memorial Art Gallery
for being petty because now he made me stronger and bolder.
Speaker 1 (36:37):
Amen.
Speaker 5 (36:38):
And you can't touch this, cannot. I wasn't singing it.
I was just saying.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
No, no, no, you can't touch this. Amen. God. Yes,
I love I love it. I love it.
Speaker 7 (36:56):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
First of all, so, first of all, you.
Speaker 3 (37:01):
Are definitely you're clearly clearly in queer media. Does every
answer you have a succaint to the point I'm.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Like, oh she is she is media training.
Speaker 1 (37:09):
Okay, yes, giving it's giving, Oprah giving giving. I do
interviews for a living. You're not gonna get a run
around with my answer. Very to the point.
Speaker 8 (37:22):
Really.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Also, John, I love you said you free free the
mother booker because.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
My heavy said.
Speaker 1 (37:28):
I was like, that's John, just a free ass motherfucker. Amen. Amen,
and continue to be my favorite thing to do when
people look at me as high I see you looking
what's going on? You are right?
Speaker 2 (37:42):
Like a picture okay, and like.
Speaker 1 (37:47):
Micro famous, Yes, I'm micro famous. You may have seen
me on the Netflix banner, Yes you know who I am.
Speaker 5 (37:54):
You've seen my book cover?
Speaker 1 (37:56):
Hello in your bar? Gay okay? And it would maybe yeah,
no play, oh my god?
Speaker 2 (38:06):
So okay.
Speaker 3 (38:07):
So I have to say a common misconception that people
have about me is that I am non binary. People
want me people want me to be MB so bad.
People want me to be MB so bad. And I'm
not mad about it, right, people like, I'm right, yeah
you are? Do you want me to be M be
so bad? And I love to see it like because
because truly like I'm not, I'm not against it, and
(38:27):
I I you know, I respond, I respond to all
pronouns and in many ways, and so maybe maybe that
could mean that I'm non binary in some way. It's
like I I've actually been doing a lot of self
work of like my idea.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
If I a's non binding.
Speaker 3 (38:41):
That way, it would be a whole conversation with like
with my family that I just don't want to I
don't want to have, Like it would just be a
lot that I'm like, it's just it's just not worth it.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Like they love me, I love them.
Speaker 3 (38:50):
I'm not trying to engage in more things with them
in that way, but I think what makes me happy
to what makes me happy to be.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
Perceived as such?
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Though, like I.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
When when the straits are like, are you non binary?
I'm like, girl, like you think these guys I have nails?
Speaker 2 (39:06):
You think I'm not binary?
Speaker 3 (39:07):
To come down when the other queers perceive me as such.
I love it because it sharpens my identity as a
queer person. Because I definitely as a queer person, I
will shout with the mount on TOMPs until the day I die.
That queer is not gay in practice, Like queer to
me will never be gay in practice, right, Like I really,
(39:27):
to me, I value being a queer person because when
I see gay friend groups, they don't look like me,
and they won't look like me.
Speaker 2 (39:35):
They look like each other.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
When I see queer friend groups, I see queer friend groups,
I see people of all shapes, sizes, ethnicities, abilities, ball
head frow head, Like I see everybody.
Speaker 5 (39:50):
In there, and they all just one of one other.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
End Okay?
Speaker 3 (39:55):
Like wait, like we are the spectrum and I think
to me, it's like I think, what makes you so happy?
And people trying the question? It is like, you can't
tell me that my community and you like earlier, you
can tell me that. You can't tell me that my
community isn't isn't bad, Like we have a bunch of
bad bitches, like we just love and we love being bad.
(40:16):
Like you can't tell that my community isn't cool, isn't dope? Right,
you can't you can't tell me. You can't tell me
that my community is not dope when I have doctor
John Paul in the community.
Speaker 1 (40:25):
No, no, no, it's not me. Okay, let's talk about Denali.
Can we we know? I don't know if we know.
We met Danali at the right Yes, at the Creators
two years ago. My god, ethereal that that girl.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
You can't tell me the machan is not bad.
Speaker 3 (40:41):
When you see artists like you see artists like Dana Joel,
you can't tell me it's not bad. When the te
Royals on our show, you get it's not bad. When
we have Level Transt on our show today, you can't.
You can't tell me that my community is bad. The
co mean is not bad as fun when you see that,
when you when you see the material of who we.
Speaker 8 (40:58):
Have, like like in the lineup of our lives, and
if I can add to your point the fact that
we still you know, and again I think about this
when I think about you, Marie, and it's it's really
I think this is the perfect episode for me to
do this.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
I think in terms of getting emotional, I haven't cried
on the show for a minute. How amazing you are
even with all you've probably had to deal with. And
I don't know your story fully, but it is so
overwhelming to me to know like you're here and you're
making a difference through your work, through just existing through everything,
(41:38):
and so it's just it's I think about that a lot.
It's like we are all dealing with so much, and
we all have so much up against us, and we're
still thriving. And we're still moving.
Speaker 7 (41:50):
You know.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
I think I look at you, Joho, and it's like
I get emotional sometimes because I'm like, you're so happy
all the time, and there's so much shit that I
know was being thrown at you, you know, across the board,
and it's like my sister is still happy, Like that's
just it blows my mind. And so I think, like,
that's what where my emotions is coming from right now,
(42:12):
is this notion of like life continues to keep trying,
Like I won't even say life, these beat this Christ,
these white niggas, these white niggas keep trying to take
it away from us, and we keep showing up bad
(42:32):
and greater and stronger than my God, My God. It's
you know, I've been saying this and I've been and
I've mean it more than ever now. If God was
to take me tomorrow and say do you want to
go back down to that hellscape? I would say yep.
And I would ask to be black and queer and
fat all over again, all over again.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
Yep.
Speaker 5 (42:51):
Yeah. And you know, I think we live and survive
not just for ourselves. We live and survive for the
youth who is looking up to us and it's amazed
that we can be comfortable in our skins, but we
are also living and thriving and surviving for those who
were taken far too soon. There's beauty and that there's
(43:15):
power in that.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:18):
I love that so much because because it because like
it's like it's it's it's I was want to say
this is That's what I was gonna say myself is
like like like like like I I like I live
because I can because I have that privilege to do so,
and not everyone does and not everybody gets a chance
to survive. I live because I'll be identify. Let some
(43:40):
ragged yes, dusty s crop dusting ass like nasty as administration,
administration take me out, I'll begin that happens like like
I survived because I know I need that when I
when I was younger, and I know.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
And and and like not that I'm not that I'm.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
The one to do it for like the like the
generations of people, but I'm one of the people that
I get you stand here with my trans siblings, with
my with my own gener kno going for my.
Speaker 2 (44:09):
Siblings with you know, with with our straight allies.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
I get you stand with them and say like we
we we will not go like I am here on
Queer and I will always be here for that.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Amen.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
All right, my god, what a segment. Oh what a segment.
I'm just I'm loving every of this episode and I
know I'm looking. I'm just, I'm like, girl, you can't
keep crying like this on the night, but uh no,
it is. It is definitely one of those moments where,
like I said, I'm just, I sit in awe of
(44:41):
just and I hope anyone who is trans that is
listening to this, regardless of you are black or not,
I hope you hear the joy that and the love
that is radiating from all of us for you today
because you deserve it. You deserve to know how special
and important and how much you add to this world,
not just today. Like I said, I've been telling people
(45:02):
I want I want to be black three sixty five,
I want to be queer three sixty five. I want
trans people to be loved and upheld three sixty five.
Shit three sixty six. Give them everything and more, put
extra on the love that you give them, because they
absolutely deserve it. But that being said, we got to
take one more break to make sure that we take
care of some bills, and then when we get back
we have your favorite segment, Yes ma'am and No Man
(45:24):
Pam will.
Speaker 5 (45:24):
Be back in a minute.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
Okay, so before we jump into yes ma'am and No
Man Pam. Sometimes folks get confused. No Man Pam is
basically something that's happening in the scope of the world
that you It could be really big, it can be
really small, and that's something that you're like, you're yes,
and you're like, yes, this is amazing, this is really,
you know, awesome. And then no ma'am is usually when
(45:55):
you're just kind of like, this bitch did this or
this person said this or that person did that thing,
and I want to call it out. So again, yeah,
you can call it out again. If you won't, you
can say I want to come back to this, and
because I've done that, I have talked about something at
the top of the episode and said, you know what,
in my no man, I'm gonna go back because I'm
still not done with what I just talked about, So
(46:18):
you could do that too. So I just wanted to
make sure that you know that this is basically your
section just to pretty much go off, Oh perfect you cool.
All right, here we go, all right, y'all. So this
week we're gonna go ahead jump right into our yes
man and our no man, PAMs my yes, ma'am. This
week is Jasmine Crockett.
Speaker 2 (46:35):
Period.
Speaker 1 (46:36):
I know that she's been catching a lot of heat
for calling that man she said wheels, And I know
I know that everybody has been on her head about that, like,
oh that's able to listen to. Maybe it is and
and and and and I pray that y'all don't cancel
me for saying what I'm about to say. Yes, I
(46:58):
understand this, but I wish we gave folks on the
right the same kind of heat, because nobody said jack
shit when your president was up there making fun of
disabled people. You're like, your president is taking away like
disabled people's rights and money and and access to care.
So we jump all on Jasmine Crockett about her making
(47:20):
one statement and calling him Senator hot wheels. Right, But
the reality of the matter is is that nobody like
if we're if we're gonna talk about it, let's be fair, like,
you know what I mean, critique them as much as
you critique us, because that like this is you know
what this is gonna get me into my no man, Pam.
And I know y'all know I have been really trying
to stay away from all of the politics on this episode,
(47:42):
but this is also where I'm am my no, ma'am.
I you know, I am. I feel like I'm not
educated enough to get into all of the schematics of
what the what democrats are doing wrong and blah blah blah.
I know people who can't. I'm not that girl. I'm
not gonna. I don't. I don't care enough, no shade,
I don't care enough to see down and to start
critiquing people like AOC and all these other people that
(48:04):
folks critique. Right, That's just not me. It's never gonna
be me. What I will say is this, I need
somebody to come up with a resistance plan. I'm tired
of hearing folks talking about what's wrong. I need people
to start doing something about what's wrong. And so my
no ma'am is for folks who are one running scared
of these people on the right. Right, these folks who
(48:26):
are sitting here going, oh, well, we have to play fair.
We have no them niggas are over there not playing fair.
They're not playing they and they know that, and we
all know that fairness is not gonna get us to liberation.
It's not the playbook is not gonna get us to liberation.
It's not gonna get us free. It's not gonna get
us our rights. It's not gonna get us. So we
have to come up with something. I'm also sick and
(48:48):
tired of people sitting and critiquing and not helping to
come up with the plan. That is the other thing
that I'm really tired of. When we talk about it, right,
y'all got a lot of people who love to be
on the keys and love to talk about the the
dms and all of this and who's doing this and
who's not doing that? Da da da dah. But ain't
none of y'all organizing a march. Ain't none of y'all
organizing funds for people who need funds because they lost
(49:09):
their jobs. Ain't none of y'all trying to find people food?
Like there's just so much. And someone could probably turn
around and say, well, John, what are you doing? I
give my money to where I need to give it to.
I help my people organize. I'm I'm working with the
was it fifty I just was it five oh one
five to one. It's an organ A local was five
(49:30):
oh five five to one. There's an organization that is
helping to, you know, help youth specifically organize. I have
been helping them with their media strategy. So if you
really want to talk about it, I'm about it right.
I'm doing what I need to do on my end.
What are you doing? And so I'm just I'm just
tired of I think my the advocacy in me and
y'all know this. I used to I used to march,
(49:51):
I used to be an organizer House down Boots. It
really really makes me upset that there's so much talk
and not enough action. And I'm just really at that
point now where I'm tired of people talking about, well,
what are we gonna do? Our ancestors left us the blueprint,
like we've been here before, what like what is it?
What else is it gonna take for us to take
(50:13):
it to the streets and to let people know what power?
And I know people who are so I want to
make sure I give credit there. But like I said,
I'm just really tired of folks letting the right run
them and I and I've set this again and and then,
and then I'll pass it on to Marie Adelina. I
I've said this. If you are a person who is
who happens to find this episode on the right and
you think you're going to come for me, I am
(50:35):
taking a page out of Maxine Waters book and saying
you better not miss and don't show up to my
door acting like I'm a play scare because you've come
to You've come to find me because I'm not. I'm
not that girl. You are not the girl you want
to cat. I am not the girl you want to
catch on a good day or a bad day. So
so keep it online. You keep it online, because I'm
(50:58):
gonna tell you right now, I am in Bread. I
am Cambernardino bread. I I'm gonna leave it at that.
Beat you somebody else, Mariette Alina, what are your yes, ma'ams?
And no man pants, That is my yes, ma'am.
Speaker 5 (51:17):
I have to give it up to Michelle Buteaux Amen.
Survival of the Biggest Season two is so so, so,
so so good, and I love that she does not
tone it down. She tones it up. I love that
she that she uses her platform to uplift people. You know,
(51:41):
we the if you watch a show, I don't want
to get spoilers, but it's not. But you know, having
a trans story in in the season, a beautiful story
in this season, it's amazing. So I I always give
it up to her. She's amazing. My nomad are just
miserable ass people not minding their business.
Speaker 2 (52:05):
The maps I don't.
Speaker 5 (52:09):
I just don't understand why you are miserable and nosy.
Speaker 1 (52:14):
Like because they need somebody. Yeah, go off. I don't
want to cut you off.
Speaker 5 (52:19):
So I went out, uh the other night with my sisters,
my trans sisters, to a straight bar, and it's something
I do all the time because I do feel comfortable
in those spaces. And I guess one of the sisters
she knew a guy in the past and he's and
(52:41):
he saw her talking to someone else. So when the
guy left, he like five minutes, five ten minutes went by.
He came back and his whole demeanor changed, and then
he started asking questions like are you training and things
like that, And it was that miserable ass man that
she knew. And if people like him like go do something, Yeah,
(53:09):
stay home. If you're not miserable, mind's your business.
Speaker 1 (53:14):
But misery loves company, says that's that's what I was
gonna say, misery, They love company, honey. And to the doll.
Speaker 5 (53:21):
Because you're so miserable to be around.
Speaker 1 (53:23):
Yeah, you can't keep company because you're miserable. But a
lot of the dolls, you know, I tell people all
the time, A lot of the dolls don't need a partner.
They need a therapist.
Speaker 5 (53:31):
Yeah, yeah, excuse me. I mean.
Speaker 1 (53:37):
A lot of them need a therapist, a black one
at that. Well, let's talk about it, mother, Joe ho.
What's on your radar?
Speaker 3 (53:49):
Mins? Minds real silly y'all. So my yes, ma'am is
whoever there's been. I don't know if y'all call the
memes and stuff, But there was a meme that was
like when o'clock, Like when when?
Speaker 2 (54:02):
When? When the glad? When?
Speaker 3 (54:03):
When the gage is clocked? But no, never hears it
does the even slagh. And since then people are now
saying like people like people are like child gag clock,
slay the gag. I want to order a child macmuffin,
gag clock slave.
Speaker 2 (54:22):
Boots honey, and then ship.
Speaker 1 (54:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (54:25):
We are messy people, And I love I love it
so much because now because now I'll be like, Hey, Diva, did.
Speaker 1 (54:31):
You clock a gag today?
Speaker 2 (54:35):
Did you did you boot sleigh?
Speaker 1 (54:38):
Did you boot slay the house down?
Speaker 2 (54:40):
Queen Queen, I'm I'm.
Speaker 3 (54:43):
Out here and talk about the like we want to
order child? Can I gag me up? Beambrio the house down?
Speaker 2 (54:55):
Can you clock me in?
Speaker 1 (54:56):
Tloopa?
Speaker 2 (54:56):
And I just locked me just because? Can we go back?
Speaker 1 (55:02):
So you know what we're gonna We got a little
bit of time left because we do not have the
time left. We don't have what I'm still I'm going
to say it. I know we don't, but we do.
What I'm gonna say is this, Uh Taco Bell got
me this week with the chicken chiloopa. It's nasty, it's dry.
Take it off the menu. I know we'll never we'll
(55:24):
probably never get sponsored by them, but I really want
them to take the.
Speaker 2 (55:27):
Words for you. That is her only order.
Speaker 3 (55:31):
Delicious. You can sponsor me, Taco Bell, he sponsor It's fine.
It is so good.
Speaker 1 (55:40):
It is not dry.
Speaker 2 (55:41):
It is Yeah, you're probably saws. He probably saws.
Speaker 1 (55:46):
I don't want no sauces on my barely tomatoes and
uh and and lettuce. Are you are you a taco
Bell girlie me.
Speaker 3 (56:01):
I mean, okay, you you live in New York, right,
you live in you live in the city.
Speaker 5 (56:10):
No, I live upstate New York in Rochester.
Speaker 2 (56:14):
That's for me. Okay.
Speaker 3 (56:15):
I'm like, I feel like i'd like to Tacaboo is
not East Coasting to me.
Speaker 2 (56:19):
I feel like it's just it's.
Speaker 5 (56:20):
Here, but it's there's other better options. But I'm also okay.
Speaker 3 (56:24):
You know we're gonna move around past this slander nation,
the judgment today.
Speaker 2 (56:33):
Oh my god, on this show. Ye come on this.
I ain't come on my own show to get a
tat like this. You are not you.
Speaker 3 (56:41):
You are clocking my gag in the worst way. You
are You are not boots housing down me. Okay, you weren't.
Speaker 1 (56:46):
And this is what.
Speaker 7 (56:52):
I mean.
Speaker 5 (56:53):
Are you eating Taco Bell like late at night or
is this like you you actively close.
Speaker 3 (56:59):
Someone O man, Pam is going to be to our
guests actually, because I cannot deal. No, it is usually
a ten PM I got, I got, I got some munchies.
Speaker 2 (57:12):
I went out from.
Speaker 1 (57:14):
Trying to fly through real quick. That was me the
other night.
Speaker 2 (57:16):
So yeah, it's it's it's never like, hey, this'd be
a great meal tonight. Is I won't sit Yeah easy
nah roof, Okay to my nomn pam. I know people.
Speaker 3 (57:33):
People were plugged into this this this week's breaking news
of the Atlantic article where the editor was in the
signal group chat with our representatives.
Speaker 2 (57:44):
So then them isn't to the group chat?
Speaker 3 (57:46):
Is so the nomad pam is to the editor who
left the chat because you had a gentleman super responsibility
to stay in that chat and let us.
Speaker 2 (57:56):
Know what was TEA child clocked the gag?
Speaker 1 (58:00):
How dare you leave? Never a woman like this? But
I had a woman like this? Yeah, you.
Speaker 2 (58:07):
I was worried for you.
Speaker 3 (58:08):
It was all like if you in that chip, I
love it. Don't say a damn thing. You slowly build
your case. Okay, you could have been there for a month.
Slowly build your case. You wait, you gave all the
five days and thirty seconds in a biscuit and said
I'm leaving the group chat.
Speaker 2 (58:25):
They all regize that you're there. Girl.
Speaker 3 (58:27):
The amount of information you could have put in that bitch,
Oh my god, why no man, bam to y'all because
to you editor in chief, because I don't know why
is it? I'm sorry you were there? Imagine it was
wild to see. I too would have been gagged as well.
I will kept my happy ass shut for good, however,
and been like, know what y'all Let me let me
tell y'all what happened in this group?
Speaker 2 (58:48):
Yeah bam.
Speaker 1 (58:49):
But mother probably was like, I'm not trying to die
over this.
Speaker 2 (58:52):
I mean because a nice do you realize secret service
at your door?
Speaker 1 (58:56):
Saying yeah very quickly because he published he published it.
Speaker 2 (59:02):
So I'm like, are you yeah, yeah, security detail?
Speaker 1 (59:06):
Okay, hmm yes, uh blink twice if you need some help.
So I can't help you, but I'm sure there's somebody
who can. All right, call Obama. All right? With that
being said, please send us your thoughts, your feedback, and
emails at Blackfatfempod at gmail dot com. We always love
hearing from y'all. You can also send us your thoughts
for your social media by interacting with our post on Instagram,
(59:28):
Blue Sky and the Ticks Up the Talk hounted by
using the handle black Fatfempod. We are everywhere, We are everywhere.
Marie Aelina, my love, Where can the dolls find you are?
Should I ask? Let me let me ask you where
would you like to be.
Speaker 5 (59:42):
Fat I'm on all the channels, on all the on
all the apps at Lovable Chans on tine. You can
read my weekly column, Your Lovable Chance Auntie every Wednesday
on Advocate dot com and like can follow me on
social at Lovable Chans A.
Speaker 1 (59:57):
Tie all right, I know that's right.
Speaker 2 (01:00:00):
Love it?
Speaker 1 (01:00:00):
I love it. I love it? Amen, Amen, Queen Jojo?
Where can the dolls find you? Would you like to
be found?
Speaker 2 (01:00:05):
Of course my life. You can find me every week
on the show, if not on my.
Speaker 3 (01:00:10):
Socials at joh Daniels across all those socials Jodan dans
dot com.
Speaker 2 (01:00:15):
Or you can find me this weekend.
Speaker 3 (01:00:17):
I wish I could tell you being home, but you
won't for me being home either because I have too
much should do.
Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
But you will find me, tell me.
Speaker 3 (01:00:23):
For sure, on my bed highest head with a taco
bell in my hand, just for just for the revenge of.
Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
It all, eating that dry ass chicken chilup, okay, disgust
all right. I just want you to love yourself more.
That's what.
Speaker 2 (01:00:49):
Is the first place to leave you. Allow.
Speaker 1 (01:00:50):
I'm gonna get me my mean bro and my can't
chicken girl, Oh taco bells, like nah, I get in it.
You see how to.
Speaker 5 (01:00:59):
In this?
Speaker 7 (01:01:00):
Now?
Speaker 1 (01:01:00):
Why am I in it? That is so funny? As
for me and as mine. You can find me in
your favorite bookstore parking lot dancing like a robot to
get people to buy my book. Please continue.
Speaker 5 (01:01:16):
Going.
Speaker 1 (01:01:17):
Yes, god nessa, I'll be in there letting folks know
that that there are copies that are signed inside the building. Otherwise,
you can visit my website at ww dot Doctor John
Paul dot com. All of the tour dates are there.
We are slowly adding more so that's actually really exciting.
But if I'm not in your city and you have
interest in me being in your city jumping my messages,
(01:01:40):
go to my website, send me a message and say, hey,
you know, Doc Dragons would love to have you here.
Is it a way we can make that happen? And
uh yeah, me and the folks over at Wiley will
try to make it happen. All right. We want to
thank our producer Bei Wang for handling all the logistics
with this show, and everyone over at iHeartMedia for keeping
the show up and running, because without y'all the life
yeah not yeah, oh, and let's talk about it. We
(01:02:03):
were just renewed for another year. So yes, yes, yes
there is. Oh look at the baby baby, Yes, a
little baby doogie. But all that to be said, we
are up and running for year What we're not going
in a year three, this.
Speaker 3 (01:02:18):
Year three, but essentially year four because we're gonna have
over two hundred episode so.
Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
Hey yeah amen, amen amen. Okay, So with that being said, anyway,
we are, we are pushing it and we are keeping
it going. But yeah, thank you iHeart for continuing to
support us and uplift this show. I wouldn't have it
any other way. I love it. Here we also like
to shout out our wonderful editor Chris ral just because
without him you wouldn't have a show or visuals which
(01:02:46):
you all can watch for free down to the Tube
of you. So if you would like to watch this episode,
that is a place where you can go. Our episodes
go live the same day the episode's drop, so feel
free to do that. With that being said, this has
been another show. Stay black, fat, femine, fabulous, and remember what, joho,
we may not.
Speaker 3 (01:03:03):
Be your Kappa Teva girl, gees a surpie or some
waldy you probably need.
Speaker 2 (01:03:08):
Anyways, baby girl.
Speaker 1 (01:03:09):
I know that's right. I love us for real bye,
The Black Fat FELM Podcast is a production of iHeart
Radio and Doctor Jean Paul LLC. But hey, everyone, welcome
to an extra special episode of the blackfeft FIM Podcast
where all the intersections of identity are celebrated. My name
is John, also known as doctor John Paul, and I
don't know about you, but nothing in this world has
(00:20):
felt the same emphasis. Snapple changed their bottle from glass
to plastic. What what is what? What is life? Why
are we? Chris? Can you put some church music over this?
Speaker 2 (00:32):
So?
Speaker 1 (00:32):
This is this is him? You know about my testimony,
You know I said that there was there was an age.
You know this, this is gonna rage me.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
There was a time.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
Do you remember when you can get a nice cold
snapper in that glass bottle on a nice so cow
spring day. You know, Mama had her food stamps, fridge
was full, and you just knew somehow, some way that
things was gonna be okay, all from that glass of snap.
Now they put them in a plastic bottle, and it's
just it doesn't hit the same. I don't know, you know,
(01:05):
it just it's something about it just don't hit the same.
And now look at us fighting over eggs toilet tissue
and all right, my god, what a moment. That is
least pleasing to me. But how are you, queen Jojo?
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Least pleasing is exactly the word I use my sister.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Jod to me.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
And I miss the compensation on that glass bottle and
it comes out, and it comes out.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
The fridge is in sunlight, and she sweats a little bit,
and absolutely hear little chrisp.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
Okay, can't wait at that bottle with just pop? Yes, God,
met mcclinch, met mclench. Okay, that that.
Speaker 5 (01:53):
Was my poppers.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Okay, that was real. Yea love nothing.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
But y'all, it is your girl Jordan or Joho in
nasty Ashui reverses Joho Jordan nasty Yes. And I just
I just want to say, I mess the lost buffalo
of reasons because arguably is it not better for the
environment to take I have conviews all let's talk about
climate change, and y'all want to give us plastive bottles.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
I thought we wanted to save our earth. What are
we doing?
Speaker 1 (02:19):
Don't nobody care about this damn earth?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I mean?
Speaker 1 (02:21):
And in turn, she ain't don't care about us. Watch
she gonna wipe us all off of this planet and
say start over, go, do not pass go.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Earth out here washing paradyce And it's like, yo, a girl,
that's a good idea of that, y'all.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
That one man circle for y'all, that's.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Exactly were gonna have. One of these days they're just
going to put a dome over us because we ain't
gonna be able to live. But anyway, uh, we still
love our Earth. Please make sure that you recycle. And
with that being said, this week we are ecited to
bring on a longtime friend and supporter of the show
to celebrate a day that we should be celebrating honestly
every day if you really want to keep bit a book.
(03:00):
But today we wanted to invite our lovable trans Auntie
to the stage to talk about love, life and identity. Honey.
She is a community editor at Equal Pride, publisher of
The Advocate, out Out, Traveler Plus and Pride dot com.
So when you see all of those really cute articles
coming down your timeline, nine times out of ten, this guest,
(03:21):
I was gonna say your name, child, because I'm not
done much you introduction. Yeah, let me pause before I
jump ahead. Nine times out of ten she has been
the one who has vetted these stories. And I also
want to shout out that she was one of the
first people to say yes to me to doing a
story on my book, and so I'm forever grateful for
her and all that she does. She is a Haitian
(03:42):
American trans woman whorely tirelessly champions voices from the LGBTQ
community while creating a vibrant community engagement approach that infuses
each story with the dynamic, innovative spirit perspective. And what
I will say to her spirit. I've met her several
times in person, and her spirit is just so warm
(04:03):
and so loving. I truly cannot say more than this,
Thank you, Marie Adelina for being with us today. How
are you.
Speaker 5 (04:11):
I am doing so well. Thank you so much. That
is a great introduction. And na, I'm not trying to cry.
I just had a hormone shot and you know, all
the emotions.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Naha, the emotions are moving. Yeah, I understand, I understand.
But we love you and we thank you for all
that you do and we are so grateful that you
were here for this special day. So for those of
you who are listening, yes, you are listening to this
episode Day of trans Day of Visibility, and it is intentional.
We wanted to make sure that we uplift our sisters
and our dolls and we talk about something that is
(04:40):
wrapped in joy for y'all, because we do recognize that
right now there's not too many moments where we have
moments to sit in joy, and so right now we're
sitting in community, and I'm just really glad that you
actually could make it, make your schedule work for you
to be here, so I really appreciate it. But yeah,
we're gonna go ahead and jump right into our first segment.
So our first segment is still here, say is where
we kick off the show and we give our love
(05:02):
as you all know, to the to the great Tisha
Campbell and letting her know that yes we are still
I'm I'm still here here. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,
We're still here and we're gonna be here forever, regardless
of if you try to get rid of us. And
so I know we are celebrating t d o V.
And for those of you who like me, struggle with acronyms,
(05:24):
today is trans Day of Visibility and I wanted to
ask you both while I know we spend a lot
of time talking about being seen, wanting to be seen,
you know, representation, all these different things that we're constantly always,
you know, kind of in conversation around. I did want
to ask you how have you both dealt with being
visibly queer in a moment, specifically in spaces where you
(05:46):
know being visibly queer might put you in danger. And
so I'll start with mine, Marie will jump to you,
and then Joho will add in your thoughts. I'm laughing
because on our show flow it just says thoughts. I'm like,
I'm like, I know what that means. Whenever I see that,
I'm like, oh, Joe Hood's got something good to say.
(06:07):
So I did want to say, you know, I don't
want to keep harping on my book, which you all
can get anywhere and everywhere. Books are so like, if
you ain't got and if you can't do the book,
you can also do the audio.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Audio.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
It's alive and well and kicking as well. But I
know that there is a moment, you know, my team like,
I'm somebody. There's a couple of people around me who
is helping to kind of put this tour together. And
one person said I would love for you to go. Well,
we got an ask for me to go to Alabama.
There's two different places they're wanting me to go to Alabama,
(06:39):
And immediately when they brought that up to me, I
was like, my god, I don't know I feel about that,
because we all know Alabama is a very red place
and we've talked about it, right, navigating this world in
a very very what feels like a very red time,
and so yes, I know that there are people who
really need to quote unquote hear from me. But also
(06:59):
this shit is terrifying. The thought of being in a
state that I don't know, a place that I don't know,
and being my authentic self. It's just you know, you know,
there's a part of me that like I want to
pass on it, but I often feel really tired at
the end of the day of thinking of it and
feeling like I'm constantly having to live in this place
of a fear. So there's a part of me that's like, yes,
(07:20):
you know, yes girl, be worried, but also do the
thing like you still have work to do, and so yes,
I'm hyper alert. Yes I'm looking at you know, looking
at all the things to keep myself safe. But at
the same time, I'm recognizing that I can't change things
in this world if I don't actually show up for them.
So again, it's like Audrey Lord said, do it's scared, right,
(07:40):
We have to do things whether we're afraid or not,
we still have to do it scared. And so, you know,
I think the biggest thing for me is just recognizing,
like it may be scary, and yet there are going
to be things about being me that might be a
like that may make me afraid, but it's going to
instill life into someone else. And that's the reason why
I keep showing up authentic self. So Marie, I would
(08:02):
love to hear your perspective on that.
Speaker 5 (08:04):
You know, I every time I enter a space or
think about taking on something, I always remember the one
thing my grandfather taught me that fear can limit our
capacity to learn, fear can limit our capacity to love.
Fear is the greatest enemy of freedom, and never let
(08:24):
freedom take hold of your destiny. And I have always
been one of the whether I'm the only non white person,
the only trans person in spaces and places that are
often not open to us. So, you know, my friend
Tracy Gilcrest said like, you know, keep our holding space.
(08:45):
I know and learn and have learned to take it,
take up space. Yeah, never dim myself or shrink myself
for other people. I am proudly trans, I am proudly black,
And no one's going to me otherwise, No stop me
from living.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
I know that's right. And it's like and even if
and I say this too, and you know, and this
is something that's a reality for many of us. Right
even in death, I've been saying too, Like you may
try it, but even in death, I'm still gonna live. Right,
people are still gonna know me, They're gonna know my legacy,
They're gonna know what I've done on this earth. And
so as much as you try to get rid of me,
I'm still like, I'm still gonna be here. So I
(09:25):
love that you say that. Thank you for sharing that.
What about you, Joel?
Speaker 2 (09:28):
You know for me being queer?
Speaker 3 (09:31):
And I said this a lot on the show in life,
but like, being queer I think is the.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Most privilege I've ever had in my life.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Like I would, I love like, I love being queer
more than I love me anything, and like and like
like I love my blackness, I love my jewishness both
so much like they would be different if I wasn't queer, right,
But queerness is what makes it interesting for me and
exciting cool and to be these ethnic ethnic identities and
(10:03):
the race racial identities. But be queer is what makes
me feel powerful. And so I think when it comes
to how I deal with being this lequ in this
moment when the annoyment being queer might be in danger,
I'm in danger regardless, like I'm Unfortunately, I have not
had the privilege of not feeling endangered. Like nothing I
do in life that's not scenings right scene is endangering.
(10:26):
But I think, you know, you know, I can say
I've made the conscious choice to say I probably won't
travel to certain states for sure, not because I have
nothing to feel scared, because I just don't have to
deal with the bullshit, Like it's just not really worth
it you have to try and do the bullshit.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
But I think also, like.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
I I cannot control how people are, how people react
to me. I don't know people are going to react
to seeing a six foot, three hundred pounds dude.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
With you know, with with come like now know what's
happened when people see it?
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Right, like and so, I, but I can't concern myself
with worrying are they going to feel scared or nervous?
And truthfully like they like like, I, you know, I
really love what you said. I really love what you're
what your grandparents shared with you, because like like like
(11:21):
like like they're like, I don't want to let their
fear and disrupt my freedom. I cannot let their fear
challenge my freedom and make me feel I can't be free,
like I have the keys to my freedom.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
They do not.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
They do not get the power or the right to
try and usurp that, you know, like that power for me.
So I think so, So I was just saying, I think
the way I've dealt with it is recognizing my queer
is powerful, and they they wouldn't be scared of wasn't powerful, right,
they wouldn't be scared of some.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
Powerful fact that is very powerful. My queer is amazing.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
My queer is what connected with people, Like my comedy
around me is so queer. Yeah, Like I truly could
cry about how amazing my community is because it's queer.
And so I know that whatever I do, like, like,
my my back is God, by my family and by
you know, bye by by my higher.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Beings, right, like I know God, God knows my heart.
I don't know about anyone.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Else's heart, but my God, my Gods is no my heart.
And so I feel supremely like I just feel supreme.
I know it's a woogle ass response, but I think
the way the world I deal with it is like
it's like I know I'm blessing hally favored, Blessing hally favored.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
That's it. I was laughing because when you were talking
about being black, I was like, oh, bliming. I keep
thinking about that me and myself. When someone was like
being black is a little dangerous, but it's fun as hell,
and I'm like, yes, and then you's freaking some queerness
for razzle dazzle, and yes, bitch, like this ship is
(12:59):
really scary, but my god, isn't it fun.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Because it's it's probably to be like it's probably be
like like, oh, I get to do I get to
be part of the cultures that ever's trying to buy
all the time, Like y'all say on our y'all stand
as trying and buy our ship all the time.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Okay, the power we have.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Look at the material, Oh my.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Material like I had a it's funny because you say this,
and I know we have to go to commercial, but
I was laughing because I was talking to someone I
assume is strength and he was and he basically was like,
what's it giving? And I looked at him it was
like wait a second. Now, it was like wait a second,
(13:39):
and I was like nothing, trying to take our lingo right,
Like it's just that kind of ship where I'm like,
y'all want to be so bad y y'all hate us,
but y'all want to be a bass bitches.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Pick me as.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I live, all right, y'all. Well, with that being said,
now that we all have signed up for Mui Tai
kickbox and classes because if you know, you know, we
are going to take a short break and when we
come back, we are going to have more with our
lovable trans Antie back in a second.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
Okay, family, we are back, and this week for category
is we want to chat with our teachers discuss the
concept of visibility on trans Day of Visibility.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
So first I want to give you a.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Quick little heirstory lesson and then we'll pass to our
guest because it's not her job to tell y'all.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
I never would, I never, never was, never will be Okay.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
T d o B was founded by Rachel Crandall Crocker,
a psycho therapist and the exec director of Transgender Michigan
in two thousand and nine. The aims to subject their
lives and achievements of trans general expensive people, while also
raising awareness about the ongoing challengeeships just discrimination that auto
leads to death and murder that the transmunity faces. This
(14:59):
day celebrities idea that we are more than our pain.
The trans people collectively should be and need to be
held in hyb regards for all that they have done
to continue to do, and my and my ad celebrated
for just existing in a world that does not want
them to exist like like like I also I also
want to do with the idea that transfers have to
like do something for the for the world be simply
(15:21):
existing is enough. And then to me, TRANSISI also celebrates
that too. So before we get into the fun, our
dear guest, Marie Marie uh Adelina, is it like so?
Am I pronouncing it correctly?
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Are we pronouncing it right?
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Okay, okay, Just.
Speaker 3 (15:40):
About what transat visibility has meant for you and why
why we should not why we should tell them at
all the time, not just on March thirty.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
First, you know.
Speaker 5 (15:49):
Being visible means rooting and grounding yourself in self love,
and it's it's something hope Giselle, because I interviewed her
or an article and she said, we we have to
learn to love ourselves in our body and our skins,
and love ourselves so hard that it feels selfish. Yeah,
(16:12):
And visibility means and I'm I know with uh. The
for the trans community, we've adopted like the butterfly as
like a representation, and visibility is the ability to just
spread your wings and fly high because for so many
of us where we're often told to like stay in
(16:36):
in the closet or to hide ourselves, but there's no
need to be in that crysalice. Just spread your wings
and fly high. And that's what visibility means for me.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Mm spread your wings and fly, but you will become
a butterfly, oh whole fly. Okay, I have to stop
sing it before we get sued, But my god, my god,
I was feeling that I was literally sitting here shaking
my hands because I felt every word that you said,
My God, what a moment. I love this response because
(17:12):
you know, for years I've said that I feel like
the world and the community too only looks at black
trans people when something terrible happens. And I feel like
visibility is not just about the idea of like, what
what what's happening on the I would say, the front
side of of the of the pain, right, I really
think that we really need to I'll say this from
(17:35):
you know, from what I know and what I've seen,
trans specifically black trans women are usually at the helm,
right at the front of every single massive major change
that we have in this country, in this world, and
and I think we need to start really celebrate. And
that's the reason why I think for me, you know,
I'm recognizing and I'm starting to to really love the
(17:56):
idea that I do have a lot of strong connection
and deep connections with black trans women who I don't
necessarily look at as oh I have to learn from them,
because that's not what it is. It's the respect factor, right,
It's this idea of how do I how do I
watch you move? How do I watch you navigate systems
that are even oppressing me as a cis gender non
(18:18):
binary person and find my voice through that. And so
when you talk about this idea of of of being
able to fly, it just means it means so much
to me, and so I I just I just love
our community so much. I did want to ask you know,
I'm I'm really happy that in recent years it feels
like trans people, specifically black trans women, have made today
(18:40):
feel more like a call to talk about right and
really thinking about how we how we discuss like how
do we have a true discussion about the privilege of
things we don't have to think about versus the things
that we do right. And I think that's the thing
for me that I really hold around this day is
how many times I've heard Angela Carross and I've heard
(19:02):
Dominique Morgan, and I've heard a lot of other trans
girls talk about that right, Like even Marsha P. Johnson.
That was her Her whole staple was give me my
fucking rights. I deserve my rights. And so I wanted
to ask you, right, as we think about this, you know,
as we think about visibility, who are some of the
folks who inspire our Auntie when it comes to being
(19:23):
so comfortable, you know, cozy in your skin.
Speaker 5 (19:27):
You know, the person that inspires me the most is
my own lovable chance Auntie I grew.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
I read that article. Yeah, I read that.
Speaker 5 (19:38):
And Kiki we were like there was only like a
four year difference, so she was more like an older
sister yea, And she came into herself in like ninety
nine two thousand in that era, So this is like
way before we had all the discussions about trans rights
(20:00):
in a more public sphere and being a black trans
woman then and navigating the world then. No matter what
and how she was treated, she still kept moving forward.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
She still.
Speaker 5 (20:15):
Remained comfortable in her skin. And she's the one that
just inspires me the most and the one that there's
not a day that I don't think about her. Unfortunately,
she did pass away by twenty thirteen, but she is
the one that I think about always.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
And you know what we're gonna do. I'm gonna link
that story to our show notes because I think it's
a really beautiful The baby pictures got me. It was like, oh,
like it like, yeah, my throat thug tear right, a
thug tear came down. But I think I think it's
so important to see, Like I think why I love
that story so much, and why I want folks to
(21:00):
read it is because we're seeing I've been saying a lot,
like I believe that my transcestors is why I'm still
here and why I'm doing what I get to do.
And it's really cool to be able to see a
transistor uplift you in the way and then seeing you
do what you do and for not even us as
the as a podcast to give you flowers, but also
like being able to to to know that there are
(21:20):
people who are reading this and are being inspired by
not only you, but also you know Kiki and you
know in this life. So now I'll get to think
of Kiki as a transistor and it really makes me happy.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
So that's so beautiful here, And I really I really
appreciate you so not so much.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
And I want to say also, I love I love
love of so much like the name lovable trans Auntie,
cause I think that's just like really really it just
feels really special because I feel like everyone wants to
be in the Auntie era right now, like everyone loves Aunties.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Everyone wants everything, no one want, no one wants.
Speaker 3 (21:50):
No one want wants me a parent, they want they
want to be a one's ontie and I love much
and so being like glebal.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
Trans is so special.
Speaker 6 (21:58):
I will not your mama, but I'll be okay listen
like yeah, and so I know I love you to
talk a little bit about the idea of like of
like why the name right?
Speaker 2 (22:11):
And also.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Why like like like why folks, why folks need to
be listening to a loveable transfer family members, even like
even if sometimes people may not love like love them
in that moment. And and I'm asking us, especially especially
after reading you know, I read your article about when
you mentioned when after Sam's murder that the ceilings may
(22:38):
have also identified with with it, may not may have
also identified within the community, and you post a question
of like like why why is me that we've that
transports have built the one that's also killing us too?
Speaker 2 (22:49):
So I would love to, you know, make sure that's
on there as well.
Speaker 5 (22:52):
You know. I I think when we tell our glories,
we humanize an experience that is otherwise being politicized. You know,
when you there's a big difference between reading us reading
(23:12):
an article or reading a report about trans violence and
anti trans bills, but when you read someone's story or
sit and listen to someone's stories. We're humanizing the experience.
We're humanizing something that a lot of people just don't
(23:33):
conceptualize or don't truly understand. And I think the power
of storytelling allows us to get so many things across.
You know, it's easier to tell a story and someone
take it to heart than to read a report or
to read it, you know, to read a an article,
(23:55):
because it doesn't sound newsy, it sounds personal, it sounds
in we're letting you in rather than you just reading
it a surface level.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Yeah, I again, and that I think that's the reason
why I think is so imperative. So I mean, I know,
not to take the light away from you, but I
think it's it made me so joyful, like thinking about
the I think it's the Trans Journalism Association, right that
we now have Travell, who is the executive director of
(24:29):
It's it's great that we have not only just the organization,
but we have trans people like Trevelle leading it because
to a degree, it's it's it's really allowing us to
allow trans people to tell their stories the way that
they want to tell their stories. And I think that,
for me is what is most important it's because again,
you know, that's one of the things I've been saying,
(24:50):
even too in my own journey. I've said, I want
to make sure that if something does ever happen to me,
that I leave behind my story. Right. I don't want
I don't want someone to pick and choose how they
get to show me in the light of the world. Right,
I'm putting all this shit out here, and if you
like it, great, and if you don't, that's okay too.
But I think it is so imperative that we let
(25:11):
trans people tell their own stories. So again, I know
that you're a journalist, and I'm just I'm so grateful
and thankful that I know that you're the one that
gets to see these stories and and kind of and
kind of handle them.
Speaker 5 (25:21):
And I don't really consider myself a journalist. I consider
myself a storyteller. Storytelling is very different from journalism. I mean,
I know, on facebool you it looks like I'm a journalist,
but I'm a storyteller. I am a curator, a purveyor
of stories.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Okay, she is, Okay, But I was also going to say,
I'm going to live in the James Baldwin and I'm
gonna say you can be both, because I truly believe
that storytelling is a part of journalism, and as someone
who has has roots of journalism in their degree, I
hear what you're saying. But at the same time, I
(25:59):
still want to give you your credit because you're out
here finding these stories. You're out here, you know, putting
these stories together, and you're and you're remembering people in
the process. So I want to give credit with that. Yeah,
I'm gonna give Yes, you are.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
We're showing you are lobal trons one receive the love.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yes, she's an icon. Is the moment come on now? Yes?
One thing when you got right? Okay, So I'm gonna
ask you this. Uh you know, I I think since
we're celebrating not only just your accomplishments, but trans accomplishments
across the board, I would love to know, like, what's
(26:41):
something that you think about in your own lived experience
or even in terms of just overall transvisibility and you
go yes, bitch, Like, what's that thing that makes you
say yes when you think about transvisibility?
Speaker 5 (26:54):
You know for so long well I can't say for
so long, but especially in in the early you're part
of my journey. I didn't see a lot of people
in the room that looked like me or lived in
my experience. And there was a moment a few years
ago when we attended the Black Queer Creative Summit and
(27:16):
seeing black trans women who are just making it, who
are creating the content, who are doing the damn thing,
and that that was definitely a moment that I was like, Yes,
we are here, we are doing it, we are surviving
and thriving, and it's it's just seeing us in spaces
and places where for so long we weren't allowed back
(27:38):
in mm hmm, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
I love that.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
So I have So I just have one more more
question for the physicateagraph for you, just because like you know,
like we're like, we're just on the topic of topic
of joy because there's so much shit happening right now.
But the thing that we love about the translavtability is
that as centers center's joy, like in concept and in practice.
And so I want to ask you, how have you
(28:05):
centered joy around your your lived experience, both in and
out of this moment, And what if I can you
give to two other trans folks who maybe are struggling
to find joy themselves m m.
Speaker 5 (28:21):
Dang, that's a hard question. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
You're fine, you said, Beyonce, what are my aspirations? You know?
Speaker 5 (28:42):
It's joy m hm trans Joy takes time.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Mm hmm. Chance, Wait a minute, hold on now, go
go ahead, go take me to church.
Speaker 5 (28:55):
It takes time. I mean, it's not I've been on this,
in this second part of my trans journey for almost
a decade now, and it's only recently that I felt
that I have like, truly, truly, truly felt comfortable in
my body and my skin, and especially in this time
in this country. It's it seems wild that, you know,
(29:19):
I would feel joyful. Joy takes time. Joy doesn't have
to look like a big celebration. Joy can be just
taking care of yourself. Joy can be going out on
a weekend and just like being seen in a space,
(29:42):
joy does take time.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
I don't know where I was going with that, but yes,
I'm so sorry, a big gas word. No, I mean work.
I just literally went back and titled the episode joy
takes time. And I think that that's something that I've
never hurt anyone put into perspective. I mean it, I mean,
because people think you're a meat like We're such a
(30:06):
people of immediate gratification, and I think that people imaginedly
like automatically think, well, once I transition or once I
once I come out, quote unquote, my life will be grand.
Everything will be great. And it's like, no, there're still hurdles,
and there's still things you're gonna have to deal with,
and you may even have more hurdles, but I can
guarantee you that you're gonna get to a place after
(30:27):
those hurdles. Like I'm almost forty. I'll be forty in
three months. And I have never been as happy in
this body as I have been, you know, And it
took me thirty nine years to get to this place
where I'm happy in this body. Right, But so I
love that you say that, because I have never heard
I've thought it, but I've never heard anyone frame it
in that way. So thank you for saying that.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
All Right, y'all, now that we have our listeners out here,
we've in translaves everywhere. We got to take a quick
break to pay Uncle scam because he's scammed us in
these streets.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
And women come back. We will have a little bit
more time with our level trons. Auntie more and just
a bit y'all.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
All right, y'all, we are back and black. This week,
we are picking up the go Love Yourself segment. We
haven't been here for a minute, and so, keeping with
the theme of trans day of Visibility, I wanted to
ask both my sisters and our new auntie a good,
you know, a good question that makes us feel a
little warm and fuzzy on the inside. I'd love to
(31:35):
ask you kind of keeping in this frame of joy,
I you know, we touched on it in our last segment.
I think it's imperative that we ask this question and
we kind of reflect on this question often now because
I think there's so much for us, Like all the
shit is heavy, and there's just so every day it
feels like there's something else that we're having to like
navigate and we're having to deal with. And so I
(31:55):
would really love to like ask you both what makes
you happy to be who you are, whether it be
non binary, trans, all of the across the board in
a moment where it feels like folks are trying to
kind of make you question it and think I want
to differentiate this question because we were talking earlier about
safety and so it may sound like we're asking the
(32:16):
same question, but we're not. We're talking about the idea
of how do you keep showing up for yourself even
in moments when you're not safe? And now we're asking
the question right like, what makes you happy to be
who you are in a time when folks are trying
to make you question that? And so I think, for me,
I'll go and then I'll ask you, Marietelina, and then
(32:37):
Joho will throw it to you. I know, for me,
I think about this a lot because while I'm like
thinking about my safety and I'm thinking about all of
the moments where I'm like, ooh, I may not want
to go over there, I may not this little little
sketchy I think what also makes me so happy to
be so outwardly non binary and blackly fatly non binary,
is this idea of knowing that I'm a free ask motherfucker.
(33:00):
I'm just free and there's really not too much that
people can do to make me go back inside of myself.
And I'm sure you all know what that means. Right
the moments where you like second guess something about yourself,
you know, or you may feel like you're flipping your
role and you're having to play being someone you're not.
I just I'm just in a place now where I
don't let niggas live in my head. Rent Free, I'm like,
(33:23):
if you're gonna be in my head, oh, trust me,
you've got to have a reason to be there. You've
got to have a reason to be up in my head.
If it really makes that, that means you're paying bills.
That means you're helping me get these student loans paid off.
That means that you're helping me find new gigs like
I don't when I go upstairs and I turn on
my Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the last thing I'm
(33:44):
thinking about is what the world thinks about me. That
makes me just feel really good, right from my nails,
to my clothes to my makeup, which I'm learning how
to do. I did my makeup yesterday for the Glad
Honor Awards, and I got complimented on it, and I
was like, Oh.
Speaker 7 (34:00):
She's learning learning, she's learning how to do her eyebrows,
she's learning how to put on a little bit. She's
learning that you do concealer after you do the makeup.
Speaker 1 (34:13):
My god, my god. I used to think it was
concealer first, but it's not you put your primer on,
you do your makeup, then you do your concealer, and
you right just learning. I'm just it's a quick tutorial,
mother's learning. What about you, Marietta Lina.
Speaker 5 (34:31):
You know it's it's calling out the bullshit and owning
it and calling out the bullshit when others may be
afraid of you doing it. I just recently was kind
of and it's kind of leading me to an my
next article on coming out as trans in the workplace.
(34:55):
But I when I came out and and I was
in like the nonprofit world, I was working at a
museum and at an orchestra, and I thought like coming
out in the art gallery was going to be amazing
and fun and people are going to be accepting. But
there were microaggressions. Amen, well many micro aggressions to the
(35:18):
point that I quit. And this was a space that
I loved. This was a space I was going to
go back to school and earn another master's.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (35:29):
So recently I called them out on their bullshit because apparently,
almost a decade later, they're still being mind phone petty.
So I put up a video and I basically said
there's a petty bitch who's still in her petty job
in her small petty world. And my mother called me
(35:54):
and she was like, are you okay.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
I was like yeah.
Speaker 5 (35:59):
She's like yeah, video, I don't think. I don't know
if that's a good idea. And I'm like, mom, sometimes
you got to burn bridges. Sometimes there are bridges that
you don't cross anymore.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
Amen, your way.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
Some bridges got trollssner them. You got you got to
trolls to amen.
Speaker 5 (36:18):
And sometimes those bridges don't wait like they used to. Brown.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Some of the bitches are wooden.
Speaker 5 (36:26):
So I called them out and I said, you know what,
thank you. I'm thank you to the Memorial Art Gallery
for being petty because now he made me stronger and bolder.
Speaker 1 (36:37):
Amen.
Speaker 5 (36:38):
And you can't touch this, cannot. I wasn't singing it.
I was just saying.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
No, no, no, you can't touch this. Amen. God. Yes,
I love I love it. I love it.
Speaker 7 (36:56):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
First of all, so, first of all, you.
Speaker 3 (37:01):
Are definitely you're clearly clearly in queer media. Does every
answer you have a succaint to the point I'm.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Like, oh she is she is media training.
Speaker 1 (37:09):
Okay, yes, giving it's giving, Oprah giving giving. I do
interviews for a living. You're not gonna get a run
around with my answer. Very to the point.
Speaker 8 (37:22):
Really.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Also, John, I love you said you free free the
mother booker because.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
My heavy said.
Speaker 1 (37:28):
I was like, that's John, just a free ass motherfucker. Amen. Amen,
and continue to be my favorite thing to do when
people look at me as high I see you looking
what's going on? You are right?
Speaker 2 (37:42):
Like a picture okay, and like.
Speaker 1 (37:47):
Micro famous, Yes, I'm micro famous. You may have seen
me on the Netflix banner, Yes you know who I am.
Speaker 5 (37:54):
You've seen my book cover?
Speaker 1 (37:56):
Hello in your bar? Gay okay? And it would maybe yeah,
no play, oh my god?
Speaker 2 (38:06):
So okay.
Speaker 3 (38:07):
So I have to say a common misconception that people
have about me is that I am non binary. People
want me people want me to be MB so bad.
People want me to be MB so bad. And I'm
not mad about it, right, people like, I'm right, yeah
you are? Do you want me to be M be
so bad? And I love to see it like because
because truly like I'm not, I'm not against it, and
(38:27):
I I you know, I respond, I respond to all
pronouns and in many ways, and so maybe maybe that
could mean that I'm non binary in some way. It's
like I I've actually been doing a lot of self
work of like my idea.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
If I a's non binding.
Speaker 3 (38:41):
That way, it would be a whole conversation with like
with my family that I just don't want to I
don't want to have, Like it would just be a
lot that I'm like, it's just it's just not worth it.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Like they love me, I love them.
Speaker 3 (38:50):
I'm not trying to engage in more things with them
in that way, but I think what makes me happy
to what makes me happy to be.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
Perceived as such?
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Though, like I.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
When when the straits are like, are you non binary?
I'm like, girl, like you think these guys I have nails?
Speaker 2 (39:06):
You think I'm not binary?
Speaker 3 (39:07):
To come down when the other queers perceive me as such.
I love it because it sharpens my identity as a
queer person. Because I definitely as a queer person, I
will shout with the mount on TOMPs until the day I die.
That queer is not gay in practice, Like queer to
me will never be gay in practice, right, Like I really,
(39:27):
to me, I value being a queer person because when
I see gay friend groups, they don't look like me,
and they won't look like me.
Speaker 2 (39:35):
They look like each other.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
When I see queer friend groups, I see queer friend groups,
I see people of all shapes, sizes, ethnicities, abilities, ball
head frow head, Like I see everybody.
Speaker 5 (39:50):
In there, and they all just one of one other.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
End Okay?
Speaker 3 (39:55):
Like wait, like we are the spectrum and I think
to me, it's like I think, what makes you so happy?
And people trying the question? It is like, you can't
tell me that my community and you like earlier, you
can tell me that. You can't tell me that my
community isn't isn't bad, Like we have a bunch of
bad bitches, like we just love and we love being bad.
(40:16):
Like you can't tell that my community isn't cool, isn't dope? Right,
you can't you can't tell me. You can't tell me
that my community is not dope when I have doctor
John Paul in the community.
Speaker 1 (40:25):
No, no, no, it's not me. Okay, let's talk about Denali.
Can we we know? I don't know if we know.
We met Danali at the right Yes, at the Creators
two years ago. My god, ethereal that that girl.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
You can't tell me the machan is not bad.
Speaker 3 (40:41):
When you see artists like you see artists like Dana Joel,
you can't tell me it's not bad. When the te
Royals on our show, you get it's not bad. When
we have Level Transt on our show today, you can't.
You can't tell me that my community is bad. The
co mean is not bad as fun when you see that,
when you when you see the material of who we.
Speaker 8 (40:58):
Have, like like in the lineup of our lives, and
if I can add to your point the fact that
we still you know, and again I think about this
when I think about you, Marie, and it's it's really
I think this is the perfect episode for me to
do this.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
I think in terms of getting emotional, I haven't cried
on the show for a minute. How amazing you are
even with all you've probably had to deal with. And
I don't know your story fully, but it is so
overwhelming to me to know like you're here and you're
making a difference through your work, through just existing through everything,
(41:38):
and so it's just it's I think about that a lot.
It's like we are all dealing with so much, and
we all have so much up against us, and we're
still thriving. And we're still moving.
Speaker 7 (41:50):
You know.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
I think I look at you, Joho, and it's like
I get emotional sometimes because I'm like, you're so happy
all the time, and there's so much shit that I
know was being thrown at you, you know, across the board,
and it's like my sister is still happy, Like that's
just it blows my mind. And so I think, like,
that's what where my emotions is coming from right now,
(42:12):
is this notion of like life continues to keep trying,
Like I won't even say life, these beat this Christ,
these white niggas, these white niggas keep trying to take
it away from us, and we keep showing up bad
(42:32):
and greater and stronger than my God, My God. It's
you know, I've been saying this and I've been and
I've mean it more than ever now. If God was
to take me tomorrow and say do you want to
go back down to that hellscape? I would say yep.
And I would ask to be black and queer and
fat all over again, all over again.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
Yep.
Speaker 5 (42:51):
Yeah. And you know, I think we live and survive
not just for ourselves. We live and survive for the
youth who is looking up to us and it's amazed
that we can be comfortable in our skins, but we
are also living and thriving and surviving for those who
were taken far too soon. There's beauty and that there's
(43:15):
power in that.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:18):
I love that so much because because it because like
it's like it's it's it's I was want to say
this is That's what I was gonna say myself is
like like like like like I I like I live
because I can because I have that privilege to do so,
and not everyone does and not everybody gets a chance
to survive. I live because I'll be identify. Let some
(43:40):
ragged yes, dusty s crop dusting ass like nasty as administration,
administration take me out, I'll begin that happens like like
I survived because I know I need that when I
when I was younger, and I know.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
And and and like not that I'm not that I'm.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
The one to do it for like the like the
generations of people, but I'm one of the people that
I get you stand here with my trans siblings, with
my with my own gener kno going for my.
Speaker 2 (44:09):
Siblings with you know, with with our straight allies.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
I get you stand with them and say like we
we we will not go like I am here on
Queer and I will always be here for that.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Amen.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
All right, my god, what a segment. Oh what a segment.
I'm just I'm loving every of this episode and I
know I'm looking. I'm just, I'm like, girl, you can't
keep crying like this on the night, but uh no,
it is. It is definitely one of those moments where,
like I said, I'm just, I sit in awe of
(44:41):
just and I hope anyone who is trans that is
listening to this, regardless of you are black or not,
I hope you hear the joy that and the love
that is radiating from all of us for you today
because you deserve it. You deserve to know how special
and important and how much you add to this world,
not just today. Like I said, I've been telling people
(45:02):
I want I want to be black three sixty five,
I want to be queer three sixty five. I want
trans people to be loved and upheld three sixty five.
Shit three sixty six. Give them everything and more, put
extra on the love that you give them, because they
absolutely deserve it. But that being said, we got to
take one more break to make sure that we take
care of some bills, and then when we get back
we have your favorite segment, Yes ma'am and No Man
(45:24):
Pam will.
Speaker 5 (45:24):
Be back in a minute.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
Okay, so before we jump into yes ma'am and No
Man Pam. Sometimes folks get confused. No Man Pam is
basically something that's happening in the scope of the world
that you It could be really big, it can be
really small, and that's something that you're like, you're yes,
and you're like, yes, this is amazing, this is really,
you know, awesome. And then no ma'am is usually when
(45:55):
you're just kind of like, this bitch did this or
this person said this or that person did that thing,
and I want to call it out. So again, yeah,
you can call it out again. If you won't, you
can say I want to come back to this, and
because I've done that, I have talked about something at
the top of the episode and said, you know what,
in my no man, I'm gonna go back because I'm
still not done with what I just talked about, So
(46:18):
you could do that too. So I just wanted to
make sure that you know that this is basically your
section just to pretty much go off, Oh perfect you cool.
All right, here we go, all right, y'all. So this
week we're gonna go ahead jump right into our yes
man and our no man, PAMs my yes, ma'am. This
week is Jasmine Crockett.
Speaker 2 (46:35):
Period.
Speaker 1 (46:36):
I know that she's been catching a lot of heat
for calling that man she said wheels, And I know
I know that everybody has been on her head about that, like,
oh that's able to listen to. Maybe it is and
and and and and I pray that y'all don't cancel
me for saying what I'm about to say. Yes, I
(46:58):
understand this, but I wish we gave folks on the
right the same kind of heat, because nobody said jack
shit when your president was up there making fun of
disabled people. You're like, your president is taking away like
disabled people's rights and money and and access to care.
So we jump all on Jasmine Crockett about her making
(47:20):
one statement and calling him Senator hot wheels. Right, But
the reality of the matter is is that nobody like
if we're if we're gonna talk about it, let's be fair, like,
you know what I mean, critique them as much as
you critique us, because that like this is you know
what this is gonna get me into my no man, Pam.
And I know y'all know I have been really trying
to stay away from all of the politics on this episode,
(47:42):
but this is also where I'm am my no, ma'am.
I you know, I am. I feel like I'm not
educated enough to get into all of the schematics of
what the what democrats are doing wrong and blah blah blah.
I know people who can't. I'm not that girl. I'm
not gonna. I don't. I don't care enough, no shade,
I don't care enough to see down and to start
critiquing people like AOC and all these other people that
(48:04):
folks critique. Right, That's just not me. It's never gonna
be me. What I will say is this, I need
somebody to come up with a resistance plan. I'm tired
of hearing folks talking about what's wrong. I need people
to start doing something about what's wrong. And so my
no ma'am is for folks who are one running scared
of these people on the right. Right, these folks who
(48:26):
are sitting here going, oh, well, we have to play fair.
We have no them niggas are over there not playing fair.
They're not playing they and they know that, and we
all know that fairness is not gonna get us to liberation.
It's not the playbook is not gonna get us to liberation.
It's not gonna get us free. It's not gonna get
us our rights. It's not gonna get us. So we
have to come up with something. I'm also sick and
(48:48):
tired of people sitting and critiquing and not helping to
come up with the plan. That is the other thing
that I'm really tired of. When we talk about it, right,
y'all got a lot of people who love to be
on the keys and love to talk about the the
dms and all of this and who's doing this and
who's not doing that? Da da da dah. But ain't
none of y'all organizing a march. Ain't none of y'all
organizing funds for people who need funds because they lost
(49:09):
their jobs. Ain't none of y'all trying to find people food?
Like there's just so much. And someone could probably turn
around and say, well, John, what are you doing? I
give my money to where I need to give it to.
I help my people organize. I'm I'm working with the
was it fifty I just was it five oh one
five to one. It's an organ A local was five
(49:30):
oh five five to one. There's an organization that is
helping to, you know, help youth specifically organize. I have
been helping them with their media strategy. So if you
really want to talk about it, I'm about it right.
I'm doing what I need to do on my end.
What are you doing? And so I'm just I'm just
tired of I think my the advocacy in me and
y'all know this. I used to I used to march,
(49:51):
I used to be an organizer House down Boots. It
really really makes me upset that there's so much talk
and not enough action. And I'm just really at that
point now where I'm tired of people talking about, well,
what are we gonna do? Our ancestors left us the blueprint,
like we've been here before, what like what is it?
What else is it gonna take for us to take
(50:13):
it to the streets and to let people know what power?
And I know people who are so I want to
make sure I give credit there. But like I said,
I'm just really tired of folks letting the right run
them and I and I've set this again and and then,
and then I'll pass it on to Marie Adelina. I
I've said this. If you are a person who is
who happens to find this episode on the right and
you think you're going to come for me, I am
(50:35):
taking a page out of Maxine Waters book and saying
you better not miss and don't show up to my
door acting like I'm a play scare because you've come
to You've come to find me because I'm not. I'm
not that girl. You are not the girl you want
to cat. I am not the girl you want to
catch on a good day or a bad day. So
so keep it online. You keep it online, because I'm
(50:58):
gonna tell you right now, I am in Bread. I
am Cambernardino bread. I I'm gonna leave it at that.
Beat you somebody else, Mariette Alina, what are your yes, ma'ams?
And no man pants, That is my yes, ma'am.
Speaker 5 (51:17):
I have to give it up to Michelle Buteaux Amen.
Survival of the Biggest Season two is so so, so,
so so good, and I love that she does not
tone it down. She tones it up. I love that
she that she uses her platform to uplift people. You know,
(51:41):
we the if you watch a show, I don't want
to get spoilers, but it's not. But you know, having
a trans story in in the season, a beautiful story
in this season, it's amazing. So I I always give
it up to her. She's amazing. My nomad are just
miserable ass people not minding their business.
Speaker 2 (52:05):
The maps I don't.
Speaker 5 (52:09):
I just don't understand why you are miserable and nosy.
Speaker 1 (52:14):
Like because they need somebody. Yeah, go off. I don't
want to cut you off.
Speaker 5 (52:19):
So I went out, uh the other night with my sisters,
my trans sisters, to a straight bar, and it's something
I do all the time because I do feel comfortable
in those spaces. And I guess one of the sisters
she knew a guy in the past and he's and
(52:41):
he saw her talking to someone else. So when the
guy left, he like five minutes, five ten minutes went by.
He came back and his whole demeanor changed, and then
he started asking questions like are you training and things
like that, And it was that miserable ass man that
she knew. And if people like him like go do something, Yeah,
(53:09):
stay home. If you're not miserable, mind's your business.
Speaker 1 (53:14):
But misery loves company, says that's that's what I was
gonna say, misery, They love company, honey. And to the doll.
Speaker 5 (53:21):
Because you're so miserable to be around.
Speaker 1 (53:23):
Yeah, you can't keep company because you're miserable. But a
lot of the dolls, you know, I tell people all
the time, A lot of the dolls don't need a partner.
They need a therapist.
Speaker 5 (53:31):
Yeah, yeah, excuse me. I mean.
Speaker 1 (53:37):
A lot of them need a therapist, a black one
at that. Well, let's talk about it, mother, Joe ho.
What's on your radar?
Speaker 3 (53:49):
Mins? Minds real silly y'all. So my yes, ma'am is
whoever there's been. I don't know if y'all call the
memes and stuff, But there was a meme that was
like when o'clock, Like when when?
Speaker 2 (54:02):
When? When the glad? When?
Speaker 3 (54:03):
When the gage is clocked? But no, never hears it
does the even slagh. And since then people are now
saying like people like people are like child gag clock,
slay the gag. I want to order a child macmuffin,
gag clock slave.
Speaker 2 (54:22):
Boots honey, and then ship.
Speaker 1 (54:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (54:25):
We are messy people, And I love I love it
so much because now because now I'll be like, Hey, Diva, did.
Speaker 1 (54:31):
You clock a gag today?
Speaker 2 (54:35):
Did you did you boot sleigh?
Speaker 1 (54:38):
Did you boot slay the house down?
Speaker 2 (54:40):
Queen Queen, I'm I'm.
Speaker 3 (54:43):
Out here and talk about the like we want to
order child? Can I gag me up? Beambrio the house down?
Speaker 2 (54:55):
Can you clock me in?
Speaker 1 (54:56):
Tloopa?
Speaker 2 (54:56):
And I just locked me just because? Can we go back?
Speaker 1 (55:02):
So you know what we're gonna We got a little
bit of time left because we do not have the
time left. We don't have what I'm still I'm going
to say it. I know we don't, but we do.
What I'm gonna say is this, Uh Taco Bell got
me this week with the chicken chiloopa. It's nasty, it's dry.
Take it off the menu. I know we'll never we'll
(55:24):
probably never get sponsored by them, but I really want
them to take the.
Speaker 2 (55:27):
Words for you. That is her only order.
Speaker 3 (55:31):
Delicious. You can sponsor me, Taco Bell, he sponsor It's fine.
It is so good.
Speaker 1 (55:40):
It is not dry.
Speaker 2 (55:41):
It is Yeah, you're probably saws. He probably saws.
Speaker 1 (55:46):
I don't want no sauces on my barely tomatoes and
uh and and lettuce. Are you are you a taco
Bell girlie me.
Speaker 3 (56:01):
I mean, okay, you you live in New York, right,
you live in you live in the city.
Speaker 5 (56:10):
No, I live upstate New York in Rochester.
Speaker 2 (56:14):
That's for me. Okay.
Speaker 3 (56:15):
I'm like, I feel like i'd like to Tacaboo is
not East Coasting to me.
Speaker 2 (56:19):
I feel like it's just it's.
Speaker 5 (56:20):
Here, but it's there's other better options. But I'm also okay.
Speaker 3 (56:24):
You know we're gonna move around past this slander nation,
the judgment today.
Speaker 2 (56:33):
Oh my god, on this show. Ye come on this.
I ain't come on my own show to get a
tat like this. You are not you.
Speaker 3 (56:41):
You are clocking my gag in the worst way. You
are You are not boots housing down me. Okay, you weren't.
Speaker 1 (56:46):
And this is what.
Speaker 7 (56:52):
I mean.
Speaker 5 (56:53):
Are you eating Taco Bell like late at night or
is this like you you actively close.
Speaker 3 (56:59):
Someone O man, Pam is going to be to our
guests actually, because I cannot deal. No, it is usually
a ten PM I got, I got, I got some munchies.
Speaker 2 (57:12):
I went out from.
Speaker 1 (57:14):
Trying to fly through real quick. That was me the
other night.
Speaker 2 (57:16):
So yeah, it's it's it's never like, hey, this'd be
a great meal tonight. Is I won't sit Yeah easy
nah roof, Okay to my nomn pam. I know people.
Speaker 3 (57:33):
People were plugged into this this this week's breaking news
of the Atlantic article where the editor was in the
signal group chat with our representatives.
Speaker 2 (57:44):
So then them isn't to the group chat?
Speaker 3 (57:46):
Is so the nomad pam is to the editor who
left the chat because you had a gentleman super responsibility
to stay in that chat and let us.
Speaker 2 (57:56):
Know what was TEA child clocked the gag?
Speaker 1 (58:00):
How dare you leave? Never a woman like this? But
I had a woman like this? Yeah, you.
Speaker 2 (58:07):
I was worried for you.
Speaker 3 (58:08):
It was all like if you in that chip, I
love it. Don't say a damn thing. You slowly build
your case. Okay, you could have been there for a month.
Slowly build your case. You wait, you gave all the
five days and thirty seconds in a biscuit and said
I'm leaving the group chat.
Speaker 2 (58:25):
They all regize that you're there. Girl.
Speaker 3 (58:27):
The amount of information you could have put in that bitch,
Oh my god, why no man, bam to y'all because
to you editor in chief, because I don't know why
is it? I'm sorry you were there? Imagine it was
wild to see. I too would have been gagged as well.
I will kept my happy ass shut for good, however,
and been like, know what y'all Let me let me
tell y'all what happened in this group?
Speaker 2 (58:48):
Yeah bam.
Speaker 1 (58:49):
But mother probably was like, I'm not trying to die
over this.
Speaker 2 (58:52):
I mean because a nice do you realize secret service
at your door?
Speaker 1 (58:56):
Saying yeah very quickly because he published he published it.
Speaker 2 (59:02):
So I'm like, are you yeah, yeah, security detail?
Speaker 1 (59:06):
Okay, hmm yes, uh blink twice if you need some help.
So I can't help you, but I'm sure there's somebody
who can. All right, call Obama. All right? With that
being said, please send us your thoughts, your feedback, and
emails at Blackfatfempod at gmail dot com. We always love
hearing from y'all. You can also send us your thoughts
for your social media by interacting with our post on Instagram,
(59:28):
Blue Sky and the Ticks Up the Talk hounted by
using the handle black Fatfempod. We are everywhere, We are everywhere.
Marie Aelina, my love, Where can the dolls find you are?
Should I ask? Let me let me ask you where
would you like to be.
Speaker 5 (59:42):
Fat I'm on all the channels, on all the on
all the apps at Lovable Chans on tine. You can
read my weekly column, Your Lovable Chance Auntie every Wednesday
on Advocate dot com and like can follow me on
social at Lovable Chans A.
Speaker 1 (59:57):
Tie all right, I know that's right.
Speaker 2 (01:00:00):
Love it?
Speaker 1 (01:00:00):
I love it. I love it? Amen, Amen, Queen Jojo?
Where can the dolls find you? Would you like to
be found?
Speaker 2 (01:00:05):
Of course my life. You can find me every week
on the show, if not on my.
Speaker 3 (01:00:10):
Socials at joh Daniels across all those socials Jodan dans
dot com.
Speaker 2 (01:00:15):
Or you can find me this weekend.
Speaker 3 (01:00:17):
I wish I could tell you being home, but you
won't for me being home either because I have too
much should do.
Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
But you will find me, tell me.
Speaker 3 (01:00:23):
For sure, on my bed highest head with a taco
bell in my hand, just for just for the revenge of.
Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
It all, eating that dry ass chicken chilup, okay, disgust
all right. I just want you to love yourself more.
That's what.
Speaker 2 (01:00:49):
Is the first place to leave you. Allow.
Speaker 1 (01:00:50):
I'm gonna get me my mean bro and my can't
chicken girl, Oh taco bells, like nah, I get in it.
You see how to.
Speaker 5 (01:00:59):
In this?
Speaker 7 (01:01:00):
Now?
Speaker 1 (01:01:00):
Why am I in it? That is so funny? As
for me and as mine. You can find me in
your favorite bookstore parking lot dancing like a robot to
get people to buy my book. Please continue.
Speaker 5 (01:01:16):
Going.
Speaker 1 (01:01:17):
Yes, god nessa, I'll be in there letting folks know
that that there are copies that are signed inside the building. Otherwise,
you can visit my website at ww dot Doctor John
Paul dot com. All of the tour dates are there.
We are slowly adding more so that's actually really exciting.
But if I'm not in your city and you have
interest in me being in your city jumping my messages,
(01:01:40):
go to my website, send me a message and say, hey,
you know, Doc Dragons would love to have you here.
Is it a way we can make that happen? And
uh yeah, me and the folks over at Wiley will
try to make it happen. All right. We want to
thank our producer Bei Wang for handling all the logistics
with this show, and everyone over at iHeartMedia for keeping
the show up and running, because without y'all the life
yeah not yeah, oh, and let's talk about it. We
(01:02:03):
were just renewed for another year. So yes, yes, yes
there is. Oh look at the baby baby, Yes, a
little baby doogie. But all that to be said, we
are up and running for year What we're not going
in a year three, this.
Speaker 3 (01:02:18):
Year three, but essentially year four because we're gonna have
over two hundred episode so.
Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
Hey yeah amen, amen amen. Okay, So with that being said, anyway,
we are, we are pushing it and we are keeping
it going. But yeah, thank you iHeart for continuing to
support us and uplift this show. I wouldn't have it
any other way. I love it. Here we also like
to shout out our wonderful editor Chris ral just because
without him you wouldn't have a show or visuals which
(01:02:46):
you all can watch for free down to the Tube
of you. So if you would like to watch this episode,
that is a place where you can go. Our episodes
go live the same day the episode's drop, so feel
free to do that. With that being said, this has
been another show. Stay black, fat, femine, fabulous, and remember what, joho,
we may not.
Speaker 3 (01:03:03):
Be your Kappa Teva girl, gees a surpie or some
waldy you probably need.
Speaker 2 (01:03:08):
Anyways, baby girl.
Speaker 1 (01:03:09):
I know that's right. I love us for real bye,
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