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May 30, 2024 19 mins

As the allegations surrounding P Diddy's behavior continue to mount, his high profile friends have remained silent. Civic Cipher co host Q Ward joins Ramses Ja and offers his insight into the cause behind the silence from Diddy's friends. 

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:02):
This is the Black Information Network Daily Podcast, and I'm
your host, ramses Jah. And sometimes the amount of stories
that make their way to us means that we simply
can't cover everything that comes our way. But from time
to time, a story just stays with me and pill
compelled to share it with you and give you my thoughts.
And now one more thing. I've seen a lot of

(00:26):
things happen recently where people who have built these empires,
people who have defined our culture, people who have done
these amazing things we indeed have lived in the time
of these people have been taken down by mobs, social

(00:56):
media mobs, chancelled, written off, completely dismissed, and it's happened
over and over and over and over again, and in
many instances rightfully so. A lot of money, a lot

(01:18):
of fame and prestige gives you a lot of access
to people that can hide bodies, for you can put
some skeletons in your closet, helme away nice and neat
and to keep you looking polished. You know, they can
make stories go away. And so once all these skeletons

(01:40):
come out and the stories come out and so forth,
and we see who the people really are. We see
the true colors of these individuals. We can then say,
I can't believe I've supported this person for so long.
So in many instances, rightfully. So. One of the things

(02:01):
that I was talking to Q, our co host for
today's episode about was our process that we go through,
at least I go through, and Q has a very
similar process. Before we decide how to feel about something,

(02:26):
we go through a number of checklists, but one of
them ultimately is kind of that let he who is
without sin cast the first stone. Have I ever been
in a situation like that? Did I just not get caught?
Was it just not on social media? Am I a

(02:47):
bad person? Having gone through that? Having said that, having
done that, is this individual that I'm now scrutinizing a
bad person because they did do it and they were
caught doing it. And this is not to formulate an excuse.
This is just kind of an introspective conversation on the

(03:08):
heels of the most recent story, which is Diddy and
you know, us watching his downfall daily. But I'll start cute,
and then I'd like for you to jump, because really
this is your episode. But you know, the conversation started,
and when that does we turn the MIC's on and
we get going. But you know, once upon a time,

(03:33):
I might have been in the eighth grade and I
used to walk home from school. When I was walking
home from school, I was walking next to a girl
named Monica Baker. Shout out to Monica Baker, wherever you are,
and Monica was she was cute. I don't know what

(04:04):
it was going through my head. I'm not this type
of person. I'm a very kind person. I'm a very
I know who I am. I've always been this way.
I didn't have to grow into this. You can ask
the people to change my diapers. They'll tell you. But
I repeated on that walk home that one day when
I was in the eighth grade, I repeated a joke.

(04:26):
There was a racist joke, and she kind of giggled
a little bit. Of course, it wasn't a racist joke
about black people. I won't say what group it was about.
But I'm incredibly embarrassed that I said that. Right now

(04:47):
in the studio as I'm talking to UQ, like, I
feel horrible having said it, awful. I wish I didn't
say it. And there was one person listening and it
was not recorded at all. And I said it because
I was dumb, and I thought that it was the
right thing to say, because it was I thought someone

(05:08):
said it and they thought it was funny. I didn't
particularly think it was funny, but I figured that's what
humor was. Granted, I was in the eighth grade, so
was at twelve years old or something, thirteen maybe, so
I wasn't in my adult mind yet, but I was
old enough to know better, sure, But it just didn't
hit me until she reacted to it. And the way

(05:32):
she reacted was like a slight giggle and like an agreement,
like huh, yeah, yeah, I guess you're right. And then
in that moment, I realized, Oh, that was the wrong
thing to say. That was a very hurtful thing to say.
And now I look like a person who is not

(06:01):
true to who I really am. I don't really mean that.
I just it was a joke that I heard that
I thought it was funny, right, any of it. If
I told that joke twenty years later, even at an
eighth grader, there'd be social media around that Joe could
live on forever. There'd be video, there'd be who knows what,

(06:25):
And in that moment, walking home with Monica Baker, where
I grew up a lot, and I realized, Nope, that
doesn't feel good to make people feel that way. It
doesn't feel good to say it. I realize how it
sounds now, and I just didn't. Like I should have
known better, and I didn't. Who knows the right thing

(06:46):
and then just does the wrong thing? Right, I should
have known better, sure, but I I have no idea
why I didn't.

Speaker 2 (06:53):
Maybe not Ras, but a lot of people.

Speaker 1 (06:55):
Well, I know, I don't know what it's like to
live that life. But the fact is is that I
lived through that moment. I had an audience of one
person and her reaction was less than enthusiastic, less than stellar,
And in that moment, I was able to deduce that
was the wrong thing to say. That that was unkind

(07:17):
and hurtful and it was racist. And I'm not a
racist person, and I can say that on this microphone
now and I know that through and through every fiber
of my being, and it would have been just as true.
Then I just happened to say the wrong thing. So
whenever I hear somebody say something racist and then they

(07:40):
subsequently apologize, I know that they're probably older than you know,
thirteen or fourteen, and they should know better. But I
also know what it feels like to be deeply remorseful.
I know what it feels like to look back on
a time in your life that is no longer representative

(08:03):
of who you are. Because I'm forty one now, and
if someone had that video of me walking with Monica Baker,
Let's say there was a video camera around back then,
and that video surfaced and it was clear as day
me walking with her saying that awful thing. If it
came out right now, the most I could say is
I'm not that person, right. So that's one of the

(08:27):
things that I go through. Led He who is without
sindcast the first done. Now, I want you to bring
us up to speed on kind of what brought us here.

Speaker 3 (08:38):
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Orleans July twenty fourth through the twenty seventh at High
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dot org.

Speaker 2 (08:53):
There has been a very palpable, noticeable silence from people
who would have appeared in the past to be cohorts, friends,
colleagues of DIDTY. There is a lack of response from
tellbody of high profile collaborators at minimum, but some people

(09:18):
who may have even been seen as friends of Ditty.
And the question that I asked you, you know, offline,
was do you think that some people are silent not
because they participated in what he was doing, but because
they checked themselves and said, at some point in my

(09:40):
past I behaved that way. Maybe not as extreme, may
be more extreme, but do I need to just shut
up because I can't scrutinize because I'm not perfect? And
before you respond, my reasoning has always been the expectation
cannot be perfection. It can't be none of us live

(10:03):
up to that standard. And if that be the case,
no one can ever scrutinize anyone for anything. I think
they let he who is without sin cast is with
regard to casting judgment upon someone, you know, that example
being both literal and figurative. Right, If you've never done
anything wrong, then yeah, looked down on someone, But it

(10:25):
is okay to point out when someone is doing something wrong,
even if you yourself has done something wrong before the question,
and I guess the inflection point would be did you
tell that joke again?

Speaker 1 (10:39):
Never?

Speaker 2 (10:40):
Of course not, but that's my point. If there is
a moment where you not just apologize, but repent and
make different decisions and put in the work to be
that better version of yourself. It's important to highlight the

(11:03):
difference and being sorry in that moment because it felt
bad to that person, but then next week finding someone
else to tell another off color joke to. I think
some of the things that caught people most off guard
or probably offended people's intelligence the most is the video
apology that he put out. Yeah, that was because You're

(11:25):
like saying, not only was it self centering and flat, and.

Speaker 1 (11:29):
He didn't even say her name, and maybe he couldn't.

Speaker 2 (11:32):
What I've heard is that he's not allowed to say
her name. But even then, the apology was not directed
toward her. The apology was directed toward those he might
consider as collaborators or fans or supporters. I'm sorry to y'all.
He even says that, And what was pointed out almost immediately,
and I felt it as I was watching that video, Like, dude,
months ago, you said it was all nonsense and all

(11:54):
lies and all bs, and none of it was true,
and you didn't do any of your life. You cannot
now say you've been remorseful since then. When you just
said none of it happened, and we then be led
to believe that that's the only time that it happened
and that it never happened after that, because that was what
as according to him, his low point. I was the

(12:15):
lowest I've been and I hit rock bottom, and YadA YadA, YadA,
will the idea cannot be And I learned this from
Ramses that when a person does something bad, that they
can that they're now unredeemable, that there's no bridge back
to being a decent person, that they are forever bad

(12:35):
and forever the worst decision that they made, because you
would create an apathetic, non participant in society that would
allow everyone to do everything wrong. If you push everyone
to that margin that ever messes up. Then when somebody
like this comes out and they are a predator and
they are destructive and they are do ruin people, nobody
will speak up because no one wants to be cast

(12:58):
aside as well, nobody wants their flaws and mistakes to
be highlighted and put under a magnifying glass. So it's
a very very interesting space to be when you are
someone who understands that what he did is horrible but
then you start to look introspectively. Have I ever done
anything not even not that, but have I ever done

(13:21):
anything that I would that I would want people to
judge me as harshly on.

Speaker 1 (13:25):
If a video came out of me telling that joke
to Monica Baker, would I want that video to come
out or would I be able to survive that?

Speaker 2 (13:33):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (13:34):
They came out.

Speaker 2 (13:35):
So it's a It's a tough place to be because
we want to listen to and support and show up
for victims. The people are terrified of having that same
eye of scrutiny pointed at them. And I think that's
why you have so many people that are just radio
silent when you would expect them to stand up for her.

(13:59):
And you know, people saying that she traded the lifestyle
that she wanted for the outcome that she got, as
if that's the decision that she made, As if someone
presented to her like, hey, you can make your dreams
come true. It's gonna cost you, but it's gonna cost
you your self, dignity, your self respect, your safety, your

(14:19):
mental well being, your physical well being. It wasn't presented
to her like that, folks. Okay, maybe you might say
that there should have been some signs, but you also
are ignoring the very obvious power dynamic that existed in
that relationship, and relationship similar to hers. We are creatives,
Ramses and I, and this is important to point out,

(14:39):
there is no direct path toward where we are. We
could not give young people the advice to get them
from where they are to civic cipher.

Speaker 1 (14:47):
Yeah, we could just get them on the show, but
we can't tell them how to do it on their own.

Speaker 2 (14:51):
There is no direct path for successful creative outcomes. It
doesn't exist. If you want to be a doctor, there
is a path. If you go out that path and
you complete the coursework required, you're a doctor. Period. For
someone like Cassie or Ramses or Kendrick Lamar or Jay
Z or even Diddy, he cannot give you his path

(15:15):
to get where he got. So when he's a person
who can create that outcome for you, that is a
very very powerful position to be in. And his rap
sheet showed there's a bit of irony here that he
could get you to super stardom. His rap sheet, however,

(15:36):
also showed that after he does whatever it is that
he does to get you there, the other side of
that heel comes fast and it goes down. Be it
having to find a spiritual connection with the creator, be
it spending time in prison, or be it no longer

(16:00):
being with us.

Speaker 1 (16:03):
There's a statement that is the fate of every successful
person person. I know you're talking about Mace, You're talking
about Big and.

Speaker 2 (16:11):
Mace, Big, Craig, Matt Loom. I could go on. If
I had enough time to sit here and think we could,
we could do quite the list.

Speaker 1 (16:20):
I think there's an important thing I want to share.
I learned this from once upon a time. I was engaged,
big surprise and not big on marriage. But did happen?
And my ex fiance told me something that I still remember,
and she said, the woman that marries for money earns
every penny. So that's kind of like a I think

(16:45):
there's a parallel there for a person who is looking
for an opportunity or that's a way of explaining a
power dynamic. So I think that that is just a
little nugget that you might be able to carry with you.
But but yeah, I want to be very clear, In
no way is this a defense of anybody.

Speaker 2 (17:11):
Well, look, let's be let's be more clear than that
this is absolutely not a defensive Diddy. Disgusting is where
I'll start. Yeah, we could do a whole episode on that.
And I don't I hear this a lot, right, I have,
I have a daughter, I have sisters, I have a mother.
But that's kind of true for everyone. So that doesn't
make me more qualified to be upset or more qualified

(17:32):
to have a position weak coward. I mean, we could
go on. The question just came up with regard to
the seeming silence from people who we feel like may
have witnessed or been around or some of this stuff.
I think people are afraid to invite scrutiny onto themselves,

(17:55):
and we have to be conscious about creating a society
where the only people that can have an opinion adverse
to what they saw are those who have never done
anything wrong. It's a dangerous society to create because what
you end up with is silence when everyone should be
in an uproar.

Speaker 1 (18:15):
Well, maybe you are without sin and you can throw
the first stone, or maybe you have lots of sins
and therefore you don't pick up any Either way, I'd
love to hear from you. Reach out using the red
microphone talkback feature on the iHeartRadio app, or of course,
you can reach out to me. I am on all
social media at Rams's Jah.

Speaker 2 (18:36):
I am the very very flawed and I am definitely
not without sin, but I am q Ward on social media.

Speaker 1 (18:43):
And let's keep having this conversation and until we do peace.
This has been a production of the Black Information Network.
Today's show is produced by Chris Thompson. Have some thoughts
you'd like to share, use the red microphone talkback feature
on the iHeartRadio app. While you're there, be sure to
hit subscribing downblow all of our episodes. I'm your host,
ramses Jah on all social media. Join us tomorrow as

(19:05):
we share our news with our voice from our perspective
right here on the Black Information Network Daily Podcast
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