Loser Line (3/24/25)

Don't give that creep at the bar your number! Slip him the Loser Line number instead and we'll play his awful voicemail on the air!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
What's up with you? Wait a minute, is this the
right number?

Speaker 2 (00:04):
It's the loser line.

Speaker 3 (00:06):
Goody, just call me back if you haven't heard the
loser line before. It works like this. Let's say someone
approaches you while you're out at the club and uses
this charming pickup line on you. Excuse me? Are you
a magician? Because every time I look at you, where'd
my pants go? Whatever you do? Was this the urge

(00:28):
to David blade on him and freezes privates in a
block of ice for forty eight straight hours instead to
tell him you would love to examine his magic wand
in private. And that's when you abra could dab on
him and given the number to the loser line. So
hopefully he leaves you an awkward voicemail that we can
play on the air. Voicemails like this one.

Speaker 2 (00:49):
Yeah, Hey, Becky, this is listen. In regards to the
March Madness bracket, I was more than happy to fill
that out for you. And uh, let's just say that
you're going to win. This is a foregone conclusion. Having
said that, when you win, I just want to let
you know that I will be expecting compensation. And I

(01:13):
think sixty percent is more than fair. Okay, so I
will be expecting my competition fee after the championship, so
please get your mindset aligned to make that happen. And
congratulations in advance. All right, we'll be in touchas.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
Oh God advanced. He knows.

Speaker 4 (01:33):
It's always the experts who do so well in those
bracket pools.

Speaker 3 (01:36):
Yeah, literally, the experts never do it.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
Right, dude.

Speaker 4 (01:39):
In our family pool, it's always a kid that wins. Yeah,
that hands down, there's no questions.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
And our friendipal's always the wives that win.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
Yes, really nevers on studying right.

Speaker 5 (01:50):
The message, Hey Jack or whatever your name is, the
woman who owns the doc that your horny ac doc
humping at the dog part, I just thought you should
know that I'm taking my dog to the vet because
she now has some sort of war or something like
some kind of canine d D. So you should probably

(02:12):
find out what other dogs that he's been trying to
get with, because there may be some sort of epidemic
of dog herpes or whatever this gross thing is.

Speaker 1 (02:21):
Just stay out of the dog party. I don't know,
is it your friend vets? I have not heard her
talk about dog herpies.

Speaker 2 (02:31):
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (02:32):
It's not a big topic the conversationies, how do.

Speaker 3 (02:35):
I know that her dog didn't give it to his
dog at the dog park? See this is why I
always have my dog Bagel wear a diaper whenever he's
at the park. I see total safety and protection every
single time, because he's a wanted Pup's an will be dry.
That's likes it that way.

Speaker 2 (02:53):
Wrap.

Speaker 3 (02:54):
There you go, And speaking of going viral for all
the wrong reasons, good transition. Have you seen our YouTube page?
All of your favorite segments are on there, Awkward Tuesday,
second Date updates, and our phone taps, possibly even our
featured loser line clip of the week. Plus you don't

(03:15):
know And as a bonus, you get to see what
we look like without filters for once, and once you do,
you will understand how the term face for radio finally
came about. There is no cure for ugly and we
are proof. Now let's move on, get back to the clips.

Speaker 1 (03:34):
Hi, I'm I'm looking for Kelly. This is the guy
you kissed on Saint Patrick's Day. I was wearing the
kiss me I am Irish t shirt. I feel like
I need to come clean about something. I'm I'm not
really Irish it's not like you can take the kiss back,

(03:55):
and I'm glad you can't because it was awesome. By
the way. I pride myself on being an honest, hand
up guy, and you did give me your number, and
I'd hate to start off a relationship on a lie.
So I hope you can call me back. I just
know that I'm not really Irish, and I apologize for

(04:19):
deceiving you. I hope you can forgive me, and I'd
like to make it up to you sometime.

Speaker 3 (04:26):
That guy's going to rotten hell for sure. Deranged, twisted
liars like this that give dating a bad name for everybody,
that non Irish scum.

Speaker 4 (04:36):
I didn't know you had so much passion about it. Yeah,
I was feeling like that was the only kiss he
got all night, and he was shocked that his T
shirt actually works.

Speaker 3 (04:43):
I think you know exactly what I was thinking, same thing. Yeah,
down with the total psychopath. Report him to Dateline, have
Chris Hansen.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
Deal with him.

Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (04:52):
I would love to see Chris Hansen be like, so
you claimed you were Irish, your ancestry and me report.

Speaker 2 (05:01):
To run get him.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
He's Italian.

Speaker 5 (05:08):
Next message, this is we matched on the dating apps.

Speaker 2 (05:14):
I guess a little bit about me.

Speaker 1 (05:16):
I'm recently divorced.

Speaker 5 (05:18):
I do have a pigmy horse named Rudy, and I
like to take.

Speaker 2 (05:23):
Him to the carnival. He really enjoys it.

Speaker 1 (05:28):
I'm active in the swinging community.

Speaker 2 (05:30):
And what else? What else? I guess I like crosswords.
I think I'm kind of boring.

Speaker 5 (05:41):
I still have a hotmail account, so read into that.

Speaker 3 (05:44):
What you will Hotmail.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
I'm worried.

Speaker 3 (05:52):
Is she actually part of like a swing club that
like now.

Speaker 4 (05:55):
Swings dance either, it's exactly what we think. I don't
think she's practiced over the years of how to work
it into a conversation. Yeah, because that is not an
easy thing to drop. No, you might as well just
included with all the other regularly.

Speaker 3 (06:10):
Yeah, but the hotmail thing is a dead giveaway. You
see hotmail at the end of an email, you know
they get nasked. Yeah, that really is Remember you can
listen to Loser Line regularly at this time every week,
and make sure you subscribe to the Brook and Jeffrey
TikTok and to our YouTube page. You can hear all
of your favorite Loser lines right there. We got a
phone tap coming up right after this

Speaker 4 (06:31):
Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.