Phone Tap: Ping Pong Mortgage

Today’s Phone Tap victim is really close to purchasing his first home, so it’s really important he finalizes his mortgage paperwork. Unfortunately, Jose is his mortgage officer and it’s EVEN MORE important that he break a world record.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
If anyone listening has gone through their first home purchase,

(00:02):
you know, can be a really stressful situation.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Oh man, you need a lot of money for that,
So I gave up.

Speaker 3 (00:08):
There's so much.

Speaker 1 (00:09):
Paperwork, and maybe you won't get the house.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
Maybe we won't get the house.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Especially tough when the mortgage company's dragging their feet on
it and it's coming down to the last day to
get everything all wrapped up. Oh well, that's what happened
to one guy. He only had twenty four hours left
to close on his brand new house, and thankfully his
best friend contacted us to prank, because you know who
wouldn't want an extremely distracted jose Bolanos in charge of

(00:36):
your homemade.

Speaker 4 (00:37):
I can help.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
You're gonna make him cry.

Speaker 1 (00:40):
That's your phone tap right now?

Speaker 2 (00:42):
Another Hello? Hey, Hey is this breast.

Speaker 3 (00:52):
Yeah, we did.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Hi. My name's Grayson. I'm calling for mortgage.

Speaker 3 (00:57):
Oh hi, Hi.

Speaker 2 (01:00):
I was going over your file, Brett, and it looks
like everything's in order on our end, so good luck.

Speaker 3 (01:07):
I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
Excuse me, Yeah, I was sorry, Like I was saying,
it looks like looks like we got all your documents.

Speaker 4 (01:14):
I'm gonna pass this on to the processor.

Speaker 3 (01:17):
Excuse me, I'm sorry, what is that annoyed?

Speaker 4 (01:19):
What say that again?

Speaker 3 (01:22):
Something's going on in the background and you kind of
sound out of breath.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
Oh oh yeah that Oh.

Speaker 3 (01:28):
Yeah, what is that? It's a little distracting.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
Yeah, I'm I'm.

Speaker 4 (01:32):
Working from home today. I'm trying to set up againness
world record for the most I'm sorry for the most
amount of time hitting a ping pong ball against the wall.
But I know it's pretty ambitious. But you're in good hands.

Speaker 2 (01:46):
Don't worry.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
Wait a minute.

Speaker 4 (01:47):
I've been using my other hand to check all your documents.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
No, this is very important to me. This is gonna
be my first home purchase. I need you to double
check everything.

Speaker 4 (01:55):
And we are so proud of you here, thank you
for choosing. But no, I totally I checked everything.

Speaker 2 (02:04):
I think I did what No, you think.

Speaker 3 (02:06):
I got it all? This is ridiculous. This is my
first home and I need somebody that's gonna give some
attention to it. Not somebody that's trying to break a
ping pong ball record. That is idiotic.

Speaker 4 (02:17):
You're in luck, Brett, because you came to the best
guy here, and if anything goes wrong, I can check it.
In fourteen hours and fifty three minutes once I'm done with.

Speaker 3 (02:28):
This fourteen hours. No, I need I close on this
house tomorrow. I need to talk to somebody who can
do this for me.

Speaker 4 (02:36):
Listen, you don't have to trust me. I should totally
do my job and also, in the meantime, I'm gonna
crush a world record at the same time. If anything,
you should be impressed.

Speaker 3 (02:49):
I can't believe what I'm hearing right now. I'm not impressed.
I'm getting kissed. To be totally honest.

Speaker 4 (02:54):
Well, are you saying that I'm not doing my job
because I.

Speaker 2 (02:57):
Am I'm here?

Speaker 3 (02:59):
Well, yeah, that's kind of what I'm saying. I need
to speak with a supervisor or someone else, or anyone else. Really?

Speaker 4 (03:05):
Oh no, no, what's Oh my god?

Speaker 3 (03:11):
What is going on?

Speaker 5 (03:13):
I lost it?

Speaker 4 (03:14):
I lost it because of you?

Speaker 5 (03:16):
Are you your KIDDI ins I couldn't keep focused.

Speaker 2 (03:18):
Why do you do that to be freends.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
I didn't do anything. You called me halfway through trying
to set some dumb world record when you should have
been working on my mortgage.

Speaker 4 (03:26):
Well you don't think I feel bad enough. I just
wasted the last nine minutes of my life.

Speaker 3 (03:31):
You're only nine minutes into the record.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
Yeah, I think maybe eight.

Speaker 3 (03:36):
Why would you call me nine minutes in?

Speaker 5 (03:38):
Well, I got bored.

Speaker 4 (03:39):
What else am I going to do during a fifteen
hour old record?

Speaker 3 (03:43):
You could be working on my house?

Speaker 4 (03:44):
Okay, starting over?

Speaker 3 (03:46):
But no, no, don't start over.

Speaker 4 (03:49):
Well, haven't keep going?

Speaker 1 (03:50):
How else?

Speaker 5 (03:51):
No? How else?

Speaker 2 (03:51):
Can I tell you?

Speaker 4 (03:52):
This is a frank phone call? Brent's idiot?

Speaker 2 (03:56):
What I lost it again?

Speaker 5 (03:59):
Stop about one frank phone call, This brank phone call,
the one you're currently in, Because this is actually Jose
from the Ratio show Brick and Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 1 (04:10):
We're doing a phone tap on you.

Speaker 3 (04:11):
Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (04:14):
Your buddy Darren set you up.

Speaker 3 (04:16):
Man.

Speaker 2 (04:16):
He said you were super stressed. You're waiting on your
first ever mortgage to be accepted, so he knew you
were like prime and ready for a phone tab.

Speaker 3 (04:24):
Yeah, and it's stressful enough without talking to some idiot
playing ping pong.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Dude, it's totally a sound effect, like I can there
it is.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
I was getting so angry.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
What, dude, you don't trust me. I can't do a
mortgage in one hand and crush them Ginness records with another.
You have no faith, my friend.

Speaker 3 (04:42):
Apparently nothing, We'll come.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
Join Ping Pong mortgage. Oh wait, I'm sorry, IM back
up again. Can I call you back in fifteen hours Bretton,
I'll just put you on hold, just down the line, okay.

Speaker 1 (04:56):
Oh I think he hung up.

Speaker 4 (04:57):
Oh I missed the ball again.

Speaker 3 (04:59):
What the heck? Weak up every morning with phone taps
weekday mornings on the twenties Brooke and Jeffrey in the
Morning