Phone Tap: Sniff My Dogs Rear

In your Phone Tap, Jeff's calling a dog sitter and seeing how far he can go to make him regret ever doing a favor for his neighbor!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's time for your phone tap. And today we call
a guy who's pet sitting for a family while they're
off on vacation. And it's not just any vacation. They're
out in the Caribbean. And you know what's the cool
thing about working in radio is I can snap my
fingers and boom fake waves. I'm out the ocean right now.

(00:28):
I feel like you're straight off. I'm trying to make
it a little bit more exotic sounding than this. Okay
you can Okay, too many waves? How did I get?
Why did I book hurricane season? That was terrible? But no,
this guy is pet sitting for the family, dog named Milo,

(00:50):
and he's never met me. But I'm gonna say that
I'm the husband and I need him to do something
for us while we're away. And that's something is going
to make him feel very, very uncomfortable. And we'll see
if I can make him do it. In your phone
tap right now. Yeah, I'm gonna have one more Penia

(01:14):
Colada and then I'll come on the jet skis.

Speaker 2 (01:17):
Okay, mom, Oh yeah, hello.

Speaker 1 (01:23):
Hey, Hey is this John?

Speaker 2 (01:26):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:27):
Hey, it's Chris, Sophie's husband.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
Oh yeah, hi.

Speaker 1 (01:32):
Yah, Hey, sorry, I know we haven't met before, but
she said that you're the one that's dog sitting for
us while we're on vacation.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Yeah. How is the vacation?

Speaker 1 (01:42):
It's great. I'm just an island by living the island life,
you know.

Speaker 2 (01:50):
Yeah, man, that sounds fun.

Speaker 1 (01:51):
Yeah. So the reason I'm Colin. I just had a
quick question about Milo. How's he doing? By the way,
he's good. Have you been given him his medication?

Speaker 2 (02:03):
Yep, every day, twice a day.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
Great, Thank you for doing that. By the way.

Speaker 2 (02:08):
Oh yeah, no problem.

Speaker 1 (02:09):
I actually just got an email from our vet that
said Milo may not need it anymore, and if that's
the case, he shouldn't take it if he's fully recovered.

Speaker 2 (02:20):
Oh okay, well should I not give give it to him?

Speaker 1 (02:25):
Well, I'm not really sure. They said that there is
a way to check though. So is he in the
room with you right now? Maybe?

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Yeah, he's right here, lying down by the cash.

Speaker 1 (02:37):
Oh okay, cool. So I need you to just go
over to him and lift up his tail and sniff underneath.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
Uh what Yeah?

Speaker 1 (02:50):
I needed to pick his tail up and smell his backside.

Speaker 2 (02:55):
Oh you want me to smell your dog's butt?

Speaker 1 (02:59):
Correct? Sorry? Is our connection not good? I am on
an island out in the Caribbean. I don't know if
I mentioned that.

Speaker 2 (03:07):
No, No, I just you said you want me to
lift your you want me to smell your dogs.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
But yeah, because the vet says that if it smells
like spearmint, then we're all good spear man. M Yeah,
they just need to know if we keep going with
the medication or not. So I just need you to
take a big whiff and let me know what it
smells like.

Speaker 2 (03:26):
Uh. Yeah, I don't. I'm sorry, I don't.

Speaker 1 (03:31):
I don't.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
I don't feel comfortable with Uh can you just can
we just wait until you kind of get back.

Speaker 1 (03:37):
Well, no, we can't wait because we're not coming back
for another five days. And the vet said if he
has too much medication, it could be harmful. So I
need you to start sniffing rear. Is there a problem?

Speaker 2 (03:48):
And no, I I just can I can I talk
to Sophie please for a second, honey.

Speaker 1 (03:54):
Hold on, Sorry, the dog sitters being he's being difficult.

Speaker 2 (03:57):
This is just kind of like way over my pay grade,
my job description.

Speaker 1 (04:03):
Look, it's not that weird. Didn't you have a roommate
in college? We all did it?

Speaker 2 (04:07):
What?

Speaker 1 (04:09):
What? Oh? You want to make me the weird one.
Just smell my dog's butt. It's for his health. I
thought you cared about animals. Isn't that why you do this?

Speaker 2 (04:20):
No, I definitely I do, But I just I just
can't bring Can't we just bring him? Can I bring
him over to the vet? No?

Speaker 1 (04:28):
They'll charge me like four hundred dollars extra for that,
and then I have to take that out of your pay.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
Uh. Just get sniffing, you know that's kind of kind
of ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (04:38):
But you're delaying this call costs me a lot of money.
So just please and make sure you don't fake it either,
because I have cameras in the house. Okay, Okay, he's stalling, Sweetie.
I'm sorry there, all right, go ahead, I'm here, buddy.

(05:02):
Oh my god, did you do it?

Speaker 2 (05:07):
Yeah? And it doesn't smell like anything like definitely not
fearmid You actually did it?

Speaker 1 (05:15):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (05:16):
I did it and it was horrible.

Speaker 1 (05:17):
Oh. You know who's gonna be so happy to hear
that is your coworker, j.

Speaker 2 (05:24):
What are you talking about? Man?

Speaker 1 (05:26):
I mean, I'm not Sophie's husband, dude. My name's Jeff
from a radio show called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
What it's a prank call? You made me? What Jay
wanted to play a prank on you?

Speaker 2 (05:39):
You made me Smith his dogs.

Speaker 1 (05:40):
But oh my god, dude, what's.

Speaker 2 (05:46):
Not staring at me like right now? It's scaring like
I did, like I violated this. I'm sorry, my Milo,
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Oh yeah. Also, the vet said that his breath that
should smell like watermelon, So could you French kiss him
real quick and just make sure. Yeah, wake up every
morning with poom tabs. Weekday mornings on the twenties, Brooke
and Jeffrey in the Morning