Phone Tap: Hans Needs A Wingman

Today’s Phone Tap victim knows he’s getting a new coworker moving from Germany, and Jose's calling to introduce himself and get him to spill where all the HOT LADIES are in the office…

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
In today's phone Tap, we call a guy who works
for a big corporation because one of his coworker buddies
wanted to play a joke and they told him they
just hired someone from Germany to be on their team.
And before he moves, he needs to ask a few
questions on the business side.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
Okay, that makes sense.

Speaker 1 (00:18):
But our own resident German, Hans Glooberg, has different intentions. Hello,
he needs to get down to business with the local ladies.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
Y'all. We're going to get to the business visiting, and.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
He needs an American man to show him the way.
Get your phone tap right now.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Hello, Guten tag. Hello is this mass.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
Ah, Yes, this is Matthew.

Speaker 2 (00:47):
Oh hello Massieu. I am Hans. I am the new employee.

Speaker 3 (00:51):
Oh right, you're the new guy. Yeah, Dave said you
were gonna call very good.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Well, actually I do have a question. What did It's
not necessarily about the business.

Speaker 3 (01:03):
Oh okay, I am.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
Wondering are you single?

Speaker 1 (01:09):
What?

Speaker 2 (01:11):
I am just curious, like, do you have a special
fraud line or you know, I do not know your preference.
Maybe you have a boy line.

Speaker 3 (01:19):
Perhaps No, I I'm single.

Speaker 2 (01:27):
Do not worry. No, I am not trying to make
the romantic time.

Speaker 3 (01:30):
On you wait what, I.

Speaker 2 (01:32):
Am due to the country and I am looking to
find some beautiful women for myself. Oh yeah, and I
want to know how does it work?

Speaker 3 (01:43):
How does it work to do what like find a
beautiful woman?

Speaker 2 (01:47):
Yeah, I've seen in you know, the American movies about
buying a drinking to impress the women.

Speaker 3 (01:53):
Yeah, yeah, you can do that here, but in Germany
this is.

Speaker 2 (01:58):
A little different. See we're talking to her about her
body and her masculine hands and how many callises she
can count on one, two, us three? Ooh, that one
counts as too, one is growing on another one.

Speaker 3 (02:15):
Yeah. I don't know if the women over here would
like that.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
Honestly, that is interesting to me. Why why not the
you know hunt callis pick up line? Oh like your calige, go,
you look very bumpy.

Speaker 3 (02:31):
Honestly, talking about women's bodies isn't the best idea over here?

Speaker 2 (02:37):
I have seen in the American TV shows. Yeah, they
do the pickup of the women. It is very similar
to Germany, but we do the cows.

Speaker 3 (02:46):
Well, were you talking about cows?

Speaker 2 (02:49):
You know, like you talk to the woman and asking
how many of the cows can she lift.

Speaker 3 (02:55):
Yeah, no, that's not really a thing here.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Really, or in Germany. The more cows a woman can
throw over her shoulders, the more suitors will line up
or down the corn.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
Now, oh my goodness, Well you've got some different customs
over there, don't you.

Speaker 2 (03:11):
Oh yeah, it's like a cream cheese festival. It gets crazy.
You guys have the cream cheese festivals.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
Yeah, I can't see we do.

Speaker 2 (03:21):
Oh my goodness. You'll never know what's going to happen
at the cream cheese festival. Yeah. One time I left
and I let us just say there were no cream
cheese left. Hants ate it all.

Speaker 3 (03:33):
Yeah, I don't know if that's going to help you.
I'd say just try to be yourself and make a
connection with them.

Speaker 2 (03:40):
Perhaps I can use the help of my new friend you, Matthew,
you want to be wing man.

Speaker 3 (03:46):
Look at that we are at lunchtime. I'm sorry, I've
got to end this call.

Speaker 2 (03:51):
Oh perfect, is lunch for me too? You can go
do the meat cute? Yeah, what it's a meat cute
when you bump into somebody random. You know, you don't
I don't know you, you don't know me? Whoopsie daisies right
in Germany. It's not meat cute, it's cute meat. You
just bring fresh meat to your fraud line and it
is so cute and the women love it. Would you

(04:14):
like a spleen from the cow?

Speaker 3 (04:17):
That's different.

Speaker 2 (04:18):
That is how my grandparents got married. He gave her
a cow spleen. Oh wow, it's very cute, exactly how
it is saying. Sometimes you have a steak. Maybe next
time you come in and you have an appendix from
a rabbit.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
Like I said, it's lunchtime, I got run.

Speaker 2 (04:35):
Oh yeah, that sounds like a plan. Dave said that
we should meet up for the prank phone call anyway,
and for lunch as well. How are you saying two birds,
one bird with stones one bird?

Speaker 3 (04:47):
I'm sorry, what did Dave say the pranking of the
phone call?

Speaker 2 (04:51):
What because your cogger? Dave said, you, man, this is
actually Hosea from Brikin Jeffrey in the morning. We're doing
a phone tap. Yeah, man, Dave said, you guys hired
a new guy from Germany and you haven't.

Speaker 3 (05:05):
Met him yet.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
Well, well, what cut of meat will you bring for
the ladies?

Speaker 3 (05:11):
Oh man, oh, I am not getting into this.

Speaker 2 (05:15):
I highly recommend some type of honey badger bladder.

Speaker 3 (05:19):
Excellent, excellent, lady. I'll probably see you guys on the
flip side.

Speaker 2 (05:25):
Okay, I'll see you at work. I love you for
head cases.

Speaker 1 (05:28):
Yeah yeah, bye baby.

Speaker 2 (05:32):
The week up every morning was fum taps weekday mornings
on the Twenties Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning