Phone Tap: Sausage Island Getaway

Brooke's calling a woman and telling her she won an island vacation to the Caribbean... just as long as she ditches her boyfriend for a beach full of hot singles.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Everyone knows. When you sign your iPhone agreement, or your
car insurance policy, or the expired lunch meat waiver at
the deli releasing them from all liability in case it
gets sick. You never read the fine print on those
things exactly. Who wants to read the boring legal crap?
And that couldn't be more true than when you enter

(00:23):
a contest. Oh yeah, you just fill out your form,
you submit it and hope you get picked.

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
Well, today we call a woman who already knows that
she got selected as the grand prize winner for a
free vacation. She already knows that, but now she's gonna
find out all the tiny little details she didn't pay
attention to when she signed up. It's your phone tap
right now on the twenties.

Speaker 2 (00:52):
Hello, Hey, this is Dana from Sales Resort. Oh hi, hi,
Ark said he spoke with you a few days ago
and confirmed you were our grand prize winner. Congratulations, Yes,
oh my gosh, thank you. I'm so excited.

Speaker 3 (01:11):
I bet it's a phenomenal prize.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
Four day, three nights day airfare, all inclusive food and drink.

Speaker 3 (01:18):
Oh, you're just gonna have to pay one hundred dollars
a day for Wi Fi. Really, I'm just kidding, I
just kidding.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
Oh yeah, but we are so excited to have you
plus one guest visit our little slice of paradise. Yes, yes,
I'm so pumped. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:36):
Good. And speaking of your plus one, who were you
thinking of taking.

Speaker 2 (01:40):
I'm gonna bring my boyfriend Jared. Oh yeah, I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
That's not allowed.

Speaker 2 (01:49):
Wait what's not allowed? So? I don't know if you
read the rules of the contest before you signed up,
but everyone who wins has to be considered available if
you know what I mean available? Do you mean like single? Yeah, no,
boyfriend's girlfriends, fiancees, or married couples allowed. So why do
you have another like fun girlfriend who might be down

(02:10):
to clown?

Speaker 3 (02:11):
Wait?

Speaker 2 (02:12):
Wait wait wait wait, No, I don't I don't think
it said anything about that. It definitely did, because the
entire contest was based around the reality show we produce
here called Sausage Island.

Speaker 3 (02:24):
I'm sure you've seen it.

Speaker 2 (02:26):
No, I definitely have not seen that.

Speaker 3 (02:29):
It's a spinoff from the Lazy River of Lust. You've
heard of that that's super fun? No, I don't know.
The best episode was the five People, One Inner tube.
I mean, they weren't even near a river, and they
definitely weren't being lazy.

Speaker 2 (02:43):
I don't really watch reality TV.

Speaker 3 (02:45):
No between you and me, I was jealous of that
inner tube.

Speaker 2 (02:49):
Yeah. So I just didn't know any of this. Like
I was just told I want a contest and it
was a vacation for two people, like one, it wasn't
about singles. I mean, most people know the resort is
all about paradise and random hookups.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
And you know, of course, no, you don't listen.

Speaker 2 (03:08):
Listen, listen, I hear you, and you don't have to
do stuff. But I want to bring my boyfriends. That
was the whole thing. Like I signed up for this
thinking this would be a great trip for my boyfriend
and I. If you do that, you are gonna have
to wear a T shirt that says prude Alert what
just so everybody knows, and you're not gonna be able
to take it off even when you swim. That's insane.

(03:29):
That's completely insane. I'm just saying bringing a significant other
here would like kill the mood, and then no one's
gonna enjoy the horizontal refreshment lounge.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
No what the horizontal refreshment lounge.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
Is that really the name of one of your restaurants.
Oh yeah, So look, this is what I would do
if I were you, I would really just consider breaking
up with your boyfriend for a couple of weeks.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
Are a couple of weeks?

Speaker 2 (03:53):
I am not interested in any of this.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
Are you sure?

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Because you are really going to want to play this
fun resort game called assault with a Friendly Weapon? Ah?

Speaker 3 (04:03):
No?

Speaker 2 (04:04):
Okay, well you could try my favorite bungalow rodeo.

Speaker 3 (04:08):
What ew got to work late yesterday thanks to that one.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
If this is really what's happening, I might have to
turn down the trip.

Speaker 3 (04:16):
What you have a free trip?

Speaker 2 (04:18):
I know, but it sounds like this whole thing is
just an invitation to hook up with random people and
that is not me.

Speaker 3 (04:24):
Well, I guess we'll just give it to your boyfriend.

Speaker 2 (04:26):
Then, when we were on the phone with him earlier
and he was all about being single, I'm sorry you
were talking with Jared. I mean he emailed us not
about the trip, more about doing a prank phone call
on you. What prank phone call?

Speaker 3 (04:43):
Yeah, it's all a joke. This is Brooke from the
radio show Broke and Jeffrey in the.

Speaker 2 (04:46):
Oh Oh My God.

Speaker 3 (04:47):
For doing a phone tap on you. But you really
did win the trip.

Speaker 2 (04:51):
Jared wrote us and said he's so excited about taking
the trip with you, so you don't have to be.

Speaker 3 (04:56):
Single after all.

Speaker 1 (04:57):
Yay, good man.

Speaker 2 (04:59):
If you we were all for this, this really could
have backfired on Jared right. Wake up every morning with
phone taps weekday mornings all the twenties, Brooke and Jeffrey
in the morning,