Phone Tap: Weefi Violation

In today’s Phone Tap we’re calling a guy who frequently travels for business and little does he know, we’ve been tracking what’s been going on in his hotel room and he’s NOT gonna be happy with our new rules for his stays!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Have you guys heard about how hotels are putting in
this new thing called we fi?

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Oh yeah, but you.

Speaker 1 (00:07):
Know about that? No, not wi fi. We Fi is
the new censor that they're putting in shower drains to
tell if the guests are going to the bathroom in there.
You know, we fie. You haven't heard of it?

Speaker 2 (00:22):
You better not pee in the shower.

Speaker 1 (00:25):
Maybe maybe it's not a new thing yet, but we
tell a frequent business traveler that it is real and
we know what he's been doing in their topic in
your phone tap right now? Hello, good morning? Am I
speaking with mister Phil.

Speaker 2 (00:47):
This is him? Who's this? Hi?

Speaker 1 (00:49):
I'm calling from the Fremont Hotel. I'm the manager here,
munch Nutley. Okay, you stayed with us last week, correct?

Speaker 2 (01:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:01):
Yeah, And while we do appreciate your patronage, I need
to let you know that you will not be allowed
back in the hotel or any of our residences throughout
the country.

Speaker 2 (01:11):
What.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
Oh, are you surprised by that?

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Yeah? Yeah, why I stay with you all the time.

Speaker 1 (01:19):
I know that we actually notice you're a gold member,
so that will be taken away from you as well.

Speaker 2 (01:24):
No wait, wait, wait, wait, why I didn't do anything.
I come in, I stay for a little bit, I leave.

Speaker 1 (01:29):
Okay, I think we know that's not one hundred percent true.

Speaker 2 (01:33):
It's here, that is true, guy, I do it for business.
I come in, I come to different states, I stay
for a bit.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
Okay. Just hearing the sound of your voice, it sounds
like you're getting defensive.

Speaker 2 (01:43):
Yeah, I'm frustrated because there's no reason why you should
be doing this.

Speaker 1 (01:47):
Well, there is a reason, because you peede in our shower.
Why sir, listen, we.

Speaker 2 (01:52):
Have proof proof that the shower.

Speaker 1 (01:57):
For the last sixty days our hotel has actually been
running our e Go Clean initiative program where all of
our showers have been equipped with Wi Fi sensors. Wi
Fi sensor certain not Wi Fi Wi Fi as in
we tracking your pee?

Speaker 2 (02:12):
What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 (02:14):
Their discrete sensors placed into the drains that monitor for
certain non sterile fluids. It tracks if any of the
guests pee in the showers during their stay. Yours went
off three separate times.

Speaker 2 (02:29):
I don't care what it did. It wasn't me. You show. Okay,
that's fine.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
Let's take a look at your Wi Fi log.

Speaker 2 (02:35):
So are you kidding me?

Speaker 1 (02:37):
So Saturday at seven forty two am, also at ten
sixteen pm, and the next morning on Sunday another golden
dusting showed up at eight forty seven am.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
Another golden dusting. Yes, no, this is this is absurd.

Speaker 1 (02:53):
It is absurd because this is not your house, is it. Mister?

Speaker 2 (02:57):
Oh my god, how would you like it if I.

Speaker 1 (02:59):
Went to your place and I went and peed all
over your shower three times tomorrow?

Speaker 2 (03:04):
I don't think I would know.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
Well, you would know because you'd have to let me in,
Like we let you into our lovely room and you
desecrated it.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
I wouldn't have followed you into the shower.

Speaker 1 (03:16):
Okay, sir, your argument is frankly nonsensical and completely irrelevant.
For now you are banned from all properties. And now, yes,
if you do try to book with us again, anybody
at guest services will know that you are yellow flagged.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
So yellow flag yellow. That's a low yellow flag. That
is that a p joke?

Speaker 1 (03:38):
No, that's just the normal warning color we use. Sounds
like maybe you're subconscious picked up.

Speaker 2 (03:44):
On it though, Oh my god, this country is going down.

Speaker 1 (03:48):
Well, it might have something to do with the things
that people are doing in the bathroom. So if you
have a problem, you probably need to look in the mirror.

Speaker 2 (03:55):
No, I'm not trying to book with you ever. Again,
thank you very much much for your pillows and your
dust might blanket.

Speaker 1 (04:04):
So now now you're just lashing out at me because
you know that it's true, and.

Speaker 2 (04:07):
You, Hey, buddy, you've got an awful job. You know that.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Yeah, dealing with trash like you, it is pretty awful.

Speaker 2 (04:14):
So wait, you're the manager, You're you're a manager, and
you're talking to me like this.

Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well I'm just I'm talking to you the way that
you're talking to me.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
So yeah, but I'm not the manager of a company.

Speaker 1 (04:25):
Well you know, I'm just trying to manage this conversation
where you've desecrated our lovely bathrooms.

Speaker 2 (04:30):
Oh my god, I hope people come and piss all
over your mattress. I hope everywhere in your hotel.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
I mean, considering your history, you probably already have.

Speaker 2 (04:42):
I hope I hope you your pants when you go
to bed at night.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
I hope that you pee yourself when you find out
that this is actually a prank call and you're on
the radio right now, so.

Speaker 2 (04:52):
This no, No, I hope you get on a prank calling.

Speaker 1 (04:55):
You're like, I'm serious, seriously telling you that you're on
the radio, serious on the on the Yeah, you're on
a show called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. My
name is jeff I'm doing a phone tap on you.

Speaker 2 (05:09):
Dude.

Speaker 1 (05:09):
Your wife, Dixie set you up for it.

Speaker 2 (05:11):
Stupid wife.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
She told us that you do it sometimes at the
shower at home. She suspected that you do it when
you're on the road traveling too.

Speaker 2 (05:23):
Oh my god, I do I pee in every shower
I get a chance. You admit it, Yeah, I admit it.
I think everybody's peeing in the shower.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
Well, we know for sure. My co host Brook is
so at least you have a little.

Speaker 2 (05:35):
Company, whoever that is. She's a fine person. Get a
ring wake up. Every morning was phone taps weekday mornings
on the twenties Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.