March 4, 2021 • 33 mins
Hugh Jackman may want to tune in this week to hear the fabulous Joan confess to her treasured granddaughter Noa - about finagling a meeting with her future husband, how to dress for a date, and who the current love of her life is...
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Ellen, how did your morning go? Today? Like every other morning,
I have to put a face on because I can't
let your girls see me without my face. I just
have to tell you that my bill at Macy's for
the makeup for the Today Show was two hundred and
seventy eight dollars. Peter was gonna die when he saw
(00:24):
the bill. To eight dollars were ellipsick, I said, Peter,
I needed a limp pencil, I needed eyebrow pencils. I
needed mascara. Did you tell him you were only on
the Today Show once in a lifetime, the first time
I called it the first time I'm on the Today Show. Okay,
you're very optimistic. Who are we going to hear today? Today,
we're going to hear from Joan, the grandmother, and know
(00:47):
with the granddaughter it should be fun and they just
love each other. They're the best of friends. I can't
wait to get started. Here. We have Joan Mendelssohn. She's
(01:07):
eighty seven years old, full of sass. Yeah, the shame
that she's twenty five. Who asked you how old I was?
I just thought it was important that people know how
much of a life you've lived and how much knowledge
you'll have to share with the world. That's the end
of Hugh Jackman for me. Now we know as I
made these seven thanks. No. It is my most beautiful granddaughter.
(01:30):
She's wonderful and she has a terrific personality and happy
to say she has my hair, gorgeous long blonde brown hair.
Did I do good? Sweet? Huh? You did great? Grandma?
What would you say? Was kind of a moment that
(01:52):
defined our relationship. Oh, I was thrilled because and I
didn't have to speak to your mother. I had you
is perfect, perfect, Sorry, Susan. My grandmother and I have
been super close for a very long time. I think
(02:13):
that we started to reach an exceptionally close level when
she realized that I could have a glass of wine
with her, and that's when she really introduced me to
her world. Right, Grandma, that's it. The only reason for
having the children in the first place was to have
the grandchildren in the second place, so I could get
(02:35):
rid of the children and just be with my grandkids,
the divine. I love them madly. We have a wonderful
time together. My daughter is okay too. You know. As
a kid, she was always there at all of my performances,
and as I've gotten older, you know, I go to
(02:55):
her for dinner once a week. My friends are absolutely
obsessed with my grandmother. So one time, a couple of
friends and I were meeting up for drinks and we
stopped at a couple of different rooftop bars. They all
had insane lines. So I was like, you know what,
my grandma lives across the street. Let's just go grab
a drink at her apartment. And we walked in and
(03:15):
she immediately start sharing her stories and her jokes. And
they look at me, They're like, why wasn't this plan
a She's amazing and I want to hang out with
her all the time. You know, with a parent, I
tend to be a little more reserved with sharing information.
But my grandma, you tell her anything, she forgets it.
So I can kind of just tell her anything anything
I want. You're so lucky. I can't. I don't even
(03:37):
know who you off hav and say, what are we
doing here? Ge? No? She what don't we like to
polish nails? We polish nails, We eat together, We miss
everybody up together. We planned how to get rid of
a bunch of the kids that we don't like together.
(03:59):
We very close. We are very close. I love the relationship.
I love the way that girl loves her grandmother and
the way the grandmother loves her. Yeah. But but but
this grandmother is a funny lady. She's got a good
sense to human To me that you know how important
it's that to humor is absolutely and I love. And
(04:19):
she said, we get rid of the door. It's are
you kidding? I would never say that about my daugh
It's they killmate. That's a funny way to think. I'd say,
you have kids, so when you forget your kids? Remark
you which When we gave my mother a ninety five
birthday party at my niece's house. The next day I
call her and say, Mom, how do you like the party?
(04:41):
She says, what party? It's his mom, the main ballroom
of the Plaza hotel. You you don't remember that party
in one top of the line. She didn't remembers. So
I figured I might as well make a nice party,
let her be happy, let her think it really were
to all. That's right, that's right, Okay, I've just been
(05:05):
handled the part titles and here we go Part one.
Hugh Jackman, is that a grandchild? I want you to
give me one of your elaborate stories that you usually
come up with. Oh you want me to lie? Yes, okay.
(05:26):
Oh I got up this morning. I guess who was
lying next to me? Who? Hugh Jackman? How did assist that?
What do you guys do? Why would I tell you that?
You're busy body? And I'm not answering any more of
those questions. Get a life. I don't have a life.
My life is you. Why don't you tell us a
(05:53):
true story? Now? How about the time you actually met
Paul Newman? I bumped ginches car. Yeah, what happens? He
read to the house in my neighborhood? And what you do?
He stopped the one stop sign in to day. But
and I was madly in love with him always. I
would have to give Hugh Jackman up for him, I
(06:14):
really would. But what happened? Graham? He stopped at the
stop sign, and what I ran into his car. It
was a perfect meeting, and he was so sweet. I
thought he would immediately fall madly in love with me
and get rid of his wife. I mean, well, what's
the point of talking about it? Gone? My one chance
(06:38):
at glory missed? It's okay, now you have Hugh Jackmen
to think about. That's true. I want to make something
very clear. I know he's married and has several children,
maybe five. I don't want him on a permanent basis.
I want his wife to understand that as well. I
(06:59):
just want to borrow him, and when I'm finished with him,
I'm gonna send him back to his wife if he
wants to go. I don't want anything permanent. Did you
tell him this when you met him? She did truly
get to meet him once. I think his wife was there.
Maybe he's laughing in the pics there, so maybe I
(07:20):
did tell him the woman has a fantastic fantasy life.
I'll tell you that. I can't wait till i'm eighty seven.
I've was eighty seven. I don't have things happening. Jackman
in the bed next to me. I let Paul Noman
have to be perfectly honest. His eyes were beautiful, but
(07:40):
I was taller. No, he's not so short. I like
short man. I don't think it's relative right right for me. Listen,
now she's got it's no guide from Bridgeton. Did you
all see him? It's no Renee Page jan Page. Oh yes,
Oh he's beauty. Oh my god, so she can give
(08:02):
up Hugh Jack. Mit, She'll have this new guy now
he's mine, is mine, he is gorgeous. Listen, at this age,
a D seven is not that far from nineties. And
that's how you live when you get to our rage.
A lot of n ands oil in the head, can't
wait in the body. Next up Part two, Ironing and crying, well, crying,
(08:27):
I know, ironing. I don't do so, Grahams. But I
want to go back to college with you. Yes. Tell
me about when you met aunt Lane, Auntie Lane. I
decided to come in as a freshman because I didn't
want to be in the sophomore dorm. So I came
(08:48):
in and there in the launchry room was Auntie Lane.
She's my friend for a hundred years, ironing and crying,
and I said, what's the matter with you? I have
to leave, I shaid, he just got here. What do
you have to leave? Because there are no Jewish people
(09:09):
with my dormitory. I said, I'm Jewish. Well, I was
exhibit A. She dragged me out. I met her parents
and she said, she's jealoush's Jewish. I can stay and
that was it. They let her stay ironing and crying.
(09:29):
She's been doing that for the last fifty six years. So, Grandma,
do you remember this at all? My freshman year of college,
I'm sitting in my dorm room and I got a
call for my high school ex boyfriend. Haven't spoken to
him in a while. I'm like, what's up? He goes,
You're never going to believe who I just bumped into
(09:50):
in the hallways of Baruk. Who your grandma? What the
hell was my grandma doing at school? He's like, she's
trying to figure out how she could sign up for
some art classes. Grandma, do you remember that at all? Yes?
I do. Indeed, I don't believe she ever found the
art classes, but they were. Now she's just to go
get her. You know, that's my motto, you want to
(10:13):
go for it. There were no no Jewish girl sea.
Oh you know that's surprising. Listen, You find Jews wherever
you go. They just have a way of getting in somehow,
I don't know it. And once they get in, they
never leave you alone. Your friends for life. Yeah, but
when I went to college, you know, they were no Jewish.
(10:33):
They were I had my roommate and one other girl,
and that was it. So I went to Syracuse London
Jewish girls with Syracuse. But do you know what, who cares?
My daughter went to American University and she pledged a
sorority that was very Southern. And I was speaking to
my son and he says, you know, mom, we're gonna
have to change our name to Culpepper, right, But do
(10:58):
you know what are You'm all young college kids. You go,
you have fun, I love each other and whatever. And
she had investigated. She wouldn't know to tell you the truth.
But UCAN is a business school. You're not gonna find
Arcolan in the business school. But okay, she didn't know.
She went and she said met somebody thought that was fine.
She does her thing and everybody seems to know her
(11:19):
and love her. And I'm trying to save her little footsteps. Okay,
Part three is up next. Dumbo an Elephant? Grandma? What
was dating like back in the day? Like me, when
I go on a date, I wear jeans and a
T shirt. What would you wear? First of all, nobody
(11:40):
wore jeans. It was still such thing as jeans. People
didn't walk around in jeans. They walked around and skirts
with matching sweaters. It was an ensemble, my dear, And
you looked elegant, well as elegant as a kid could look.
And you wore Bobby's socks and loafers. Did you ever
(12:03):
go out for dinner? No, you did not go to dinner.
That course money. You have to understand. This was right
after the depression. People didn't have money. If you were
going out with somebody wealthy, which I was not, that's
a different circumstances. No, nobody took you out to dinners.
You want to tell us how you and Papa Matt
(12:24):
I finagled it. That's how I got him. Yeah, tell
us he was every girl's dream. He was his nice
Jewish boy and six ft tall and he was about
a hundred and thirty pounds. All the girls loved him. Well,
that's all I had to hear that he now became
(12:46):
a challenge, and I knew this was it. He used
to go off campus every weekend to see another girlfriend,
and I knew where he was going. And one day
he was sitting at coffee shop and I sat right
behind him. He had his hands on his head. I said,
(13:08):
I always thought you were thinking deep thoughts, but now
I know you're nursing a hangover. Well, he said, who
are you? And I told him, and he said, what
is it your business? I said, everything you do is
my business. That was it. After that, it was made
(13:30):
in heaven. He never went off campus again because I
never went off campus again. And I snagged him and
I was not sorry from the first to the day
he died. He was the love of my life. Oh
I miss him. M hmmm, I really do miss him.
(13:53):
So when you and Papa started dating, what kind of
dates did you guys go on? We went dancing. There
was a play surround the corner on Marshall Street where
they had a jukebox and if you had the money,
you could put five cents in and you would have
five songs. I don't think they served alcohol. I'm sure
(14:14):
they did not. There was coke or whatever, and we
had that and everyone was there, all your friends when
they are dancing, and we had a very innocent, very
nice time. Why don't you tell us a little bit
about what he looked like and what your mother said
about it? Oh uh, Glee. Well, you see, he could
(14:36):
fly because his ears were flapping. So I told my
mother how madly in love I was with this guy,
and my mother said, you're madly in love with me.
Looks like dumbbo And I realized she was right. But
I could help that look, and so I did. I
went with him to the barber and I said, listen,
(14:57):
the ears on the side of the head. We can't
cut them off. Let's let the hair grow all around it,
so there'll be no space between the ear and the head.
And that's what we did. He had a full head
of hair, all curly, and it was not shaved, because
in those days the guys used to have their heads
very very short, like a Scott. Yeah, I said, he's
(15:21):
very handsome. Mother, you don't see it, No, she said,
I think he's quite ugly. Well, it took her a while,
but once I got rid of the ears sticking out,
with the hair growing, he was stunning, wasn't he studying?
He was? You picked a good one, you know what.
Of all the podcasts we've heard, she's the only grandmother
(15:45):
that said, you know, I missed Papa. But it was
so nice. She says, I missed him. There was a
nice love affair. Look how nice you mentioned him out.
She made his hair grow over the ears. We all
do things to make them better looking. Well, that's it.
We all have a vision. At once we get the guy,
we start to mold them into that vision. That's it.
(16:07):
Never happens, but we keep trying. Okay, Allen, it's time
for commercial. Nikki is scratching at the door. Gotta get
the dog out. Okay, Crumpet, tell us here comes apart
(16:29):
four marriage and money. Let's see how this is handled
in this marriage. I know how it's handled in my house. So, Grandma,
what was Papa like as a husband and a father?
It was very faithful. It was a different era. I
guess his word was his bond. He was honorable, He
(16:53):
was wonderfull, he really was. He was a pain in
the ass as well, by the way that would be expected.
But he was a very good husband. I think, a
very good father, though I suspect that if he wasn't
as good a father as he should have been, it
was because of the gulf that was his downfall. And
(17:15):
he was very good at He was a wonderful athlete.
And Grandma, how did you used to know when Papa
was mad at you picture in the refrige. You know
that my sister aunt Myra, and she was a spy
for me, and when I was in trouble with Grandpa,
she would call me up and say, your pictures in
(17:36):
the refrigerator. But if things got really bad, then my
picture was in the freezer. And if it was in
the freezer and face down, I should look for another boyfriend.
Because this was over. So tell me about your first job.
I'm curious how did that figure into your marriage. I
(17:58):
worked privately with two students, both of them were deaf.
One student, Richard Mead, who was the first deaf student
to be accepted by m I t he was brilliant.
I worked with them at school and then their parents
was so pleased with the results of my work that
(18:19):
they asked me if I would work every day privately,
which I did, and I made in those days a
lot of money because I worked by the hour. Today
they would stone me. I gave all of my money
to my husband and he said, how much do you
need to live on and run the house and so
(18:41):
and so forth. I said, I think forty dollars a
week will do it, and he gave me forty dollars
and he took several hundred dollars of my money, our money,
my money, and he put it in the bank in
a saving account. But he did do that to save
(19:03):
money for the two of you and your families and
your lives together. He wasn't taking it for himself. Oh no,
of course not. No, no, no, no no. He wasn't
taking my money and going out on the town. No, no, no,
it was a different time. I gave him the money.
Some guys would have just gone and blown the money.
(19:24):
But he was so honorable and so trustworthy. So did
Papa support the fact that you were working that he
appreciate it? Are you kidding? He almost killed me when
I stopped working. I was making more money than he was.
So what should I look for in a man? First
(19:45):
of all, make sure that he's a challenge and everyone
wants him. That's very important. He's got to have something special.
Can't be just an ambishi kid that slumps along. It
be wonderful if he had a lovely imagination. You make
the decision. Don't leave it up to the guy, because
(20:07):
they never make decisions, and they're usually wrong if they
make them, so forget that. But he has to be smart.
He doesn't have to be wealthy. The rest will come
if he's intelligent, and he has to love you more
than you love him. That would be very helpful. So
what would you wish for me when I get married
one day? What do I wish for you? Well? Happiness,
(20:30):
of course, health, happiness, a lot of love of course,
babies that's to be expected. How many babies do you want?
A hundred? You're not going to have a hundred, trust me.
How many do you want? As many as I can handle? Three? Four? Well,
(20:51):
please start now, because I'm not getting any younger. You
could have a baby now, you know. I wouldn't care.
I don't think I'm going to have a baby right now.
Oh ratch, Grandma? Why do you think of Adam? My boyfriends?
How how do you think? I did? I think he's
lovely and he loves you two pieces, which is so nice.
(21:13):
It's so nice. So you like having him around? Of
course I picked someone that you're okay with. Yeah, anyone
that makes you happy. I would be happy with what
he happens to be a very exceptionally wonderful boy. And
don't lose some where you're out, You're out of the will.
Too bad for you. Grandma already have your whole will
on the wall. Because she asked me for a favor,
(21:35):
and I said, well, if I'm gonna do this, you
have to sign this that says Grandma's will, Noah gets everything.
And she signed it, and that's hanging up in our kitchen,
so I don't know if you've got me out of there.
You know, it's so funny. She said something that my
mother used to say to me. She said, you know,
(21:58):
it's nice to have a love relationship, but the man
should always love you a little bit more. And she's right, absolutely,
But I'm just telling you younger girls, marriage is like
a game. You have to know how to play it right,
how to play up to your husband, how not to
play up the oven when give and take. It's a
(22:19):
whole philosophy of how to be married. Yeah, but you
know that ends at a certain point where because once
you got the power, you got the power. You know,
they should have a cause how to be married. There's
little things in marriage that we all old women would
come in with and you'd see it worked out. Make
(22:40):
sure they love you more. Okay, Rida, it's time to
go to a commercial. I hate to switch gears like this,
but who's paying the bills? I'm not gonna be you
and I next up Part five The Gramercy Grandma. I
(23:05):
wonder what this could mean. Grandma, tell us about how
you ended up living in the Grammercy Park Hotel. Oh,
my husband was a lawyer. One of his clients are
owned the hotel, and one day he came back from
Manhattan and he looked so upset. Apparently a couple of
kids were hassling him. They threw his glasses on the
(23:28):
floor and they stepped on them, and he said, you
know what, let's stay there during the week and we'll
go home on the weekends. And that's what we planned
on doing. And then he said, you know what, let's
just stay here and we'll sell our house, which is
what we did, and that's how we got to be
(23:48):
at the Gramercy Park Hotel forever and ever. Yeah, so,
the original owner and management wasn't what it is now,
and when these new owners took over, they turned the
Grammercy Hard Hotel into what it is today. It's this
super hip hotel where all the celebrities stay. And so
my four ft eight grandmother, who was best friends with
(24:09):
all of the doormen there, would come home every day
and they'd let her know who was there weekly i'd
get a call. No, uh, do you know who bouncy is, Grandma?
Remember when Bouncy was in your hotel? Yeah? Who was bouncy?
Bouncy is Beyonce Um a famous singer, Beyonce Bouncy. Nah huh.
(24:29):
And tall sports guys would be staying in the hotel,
she would go knock on their shoulder. You're very tall?
Like yes. So, my cousins and I actually decided to
make an instagram about her life. The Grammarcy Grandma is
what we called it. It didn't start out as a
Hugh Jackman fan page, but it slowly but surely turned
(24:51):
into that did I show it? I've showed you before? Yes?
Did I like it? I think you did? I think
you did. Do we charge? We don't large for Oh
too bad? Oh? You know why relate to her? Because
she said she's four ft in and I was like
four ft nine. My god. We could be a team,
(25:12):
the two of us. But she's killed. I get her.
I get the little lady. Oh she's adorable, she's absolutely
I just see her as like a senior citizen Eloise
at the Grammasee Park Hotel. You know what she she'd
be my competition because people see me, they said, oh,
Dr Roof. They all think I'm Dr Ruth Westimer. She
(25:35):
knows a lot about sex. What I forgot about sex,
you could write a book about, you know, Rita. When
I was much younger, I looked like Beverly Sills. And
I was in the Russian tea room one day and
a couple was sitting at a table near us, and
they kept on staring over, and my sister was with me,
and she said to me, they think of Beverly Sills.
(25:58):
She says, watch and she turns around and she says,
you know, Beverly, we have a lot of things to do.
She says, let's get going. So we go out, and
she went one way. I went the other way, and
I got into a cab and the cab driver he
turned around and he smiled at me, you know, and
he says, I know who you are. He says, but
(26:19):
I know better than to ask. So when I got
out and he says, I can't help it. Can I
have your autograph? I said sure, and he handed me
a piece of paper and I said, you're a terrific driver.
With all my best wishes, Ellen Grodsky, No, I told
you the one minute. The lady, I says, walk into
the subway. Oh, Dr Ruth, Doctor Ruth. I said, no,
(26:42):
I'm not Dr Ruth. Yes you are. I would need
an autograph, and I said, I have no paper and pencil.
She said, bleak lay here. She goes into the supermarket
right there, and I started walking towards the subway and
she comes and she's this is a gods on the strength,
Dr Ruth. I gotta paper. I gotta paper. So I thingured,
oh my god, And if I don't say I'm doctor,
She's going to be so upset. So true enough, I
(27:05):
wrote Dr Ruth west time and she goes running in
the street. I got her autography so I didn't a
miss for she was so happy. Okay, Ruda, this is it.
This is the end, part six, and it's evolving. We
all have to evolve. Let's see how she evolves. I
(27:31):
love that word evolving. Grandma, being a woman when you
were growing up is very different from what being a
woman is like now. What differences do you really see
in that? And what would you have preferred? Women are
their own people, and they do their own thing, and
(27:51):
they make a living, and they go home from work
and they don't expect that somebody is going to be
there cooking for them. Your life is harder then my
life was. We had roles to play, and we understood
what those roles were, and we brought into those roles
(28:11):
and it made our lives easier because we knew what
we were supposed to do. But isn't it kind of
special that I don't have to live by those roles?
I can be whatever it is that I want to be.
It's only special if you wanted to be, if you
buy into it, it's special. What were you like as
(28:34):
a mother? I don't think I was a great mother.
I kind of let them do their own thing most
of the time because I had trust in them. But
you'd have to have the kids said, I don't know,
I have no idea, and you better say the right thing. Kids?
Where are? How do you think you are as a
grandma better than I was as a mother? My little
(28:58):
mushy baby girl, Oh, musty musty grandma. Yeah? So what
makes a good grandmother? I think being a grandmother gives
you a perspective and sense of time. You do not
have infinite number of years, and that this is like
(29:18):
a gift that you get. Whatever you did wrong, you
can make up for with these kids, and it's fun.
How do you think our relationship has evolved now that
I'm an adult. It doesn't evolve now that you're an adult.
It evolves from the moment you opened your eyes. It's
a growing thing. It's like a plant. Can you nurture
(29:40):
it and you water it, and you careful it and
you love it. That's how it works. So your grandkid,
so me, Ben Hank, Sophie, Michael, Annie, Aman's a test, Ruby, Margie.
Do you think that our values and ideas about how
to live life match your own? Well exceed my own? Actually?
(30:01):
Not just magic seed? Because you're very close to one another.
You care about one another. Perfect You guys make me cry.
We love you. Have we surprised you in any way?
(30:22):
Grahams No. I mean I expected you to be good people,
honorable people, and you are and that's all I ask
of you. I mean, you love each other and you
show it, and that's the best thing I can ask.
(30:43):
I just know that all of you make me happy. Well,
you make all of us happy. Gee, you know the
highlight of our week every week is walking through your door,
hearing your stories. Having a drink with you, and we
all feel so lucky to have the chance to spend
all this time with you. Why do you read the
(31:09):
papers obituaries? Tear them out and leave them around the
house for me and my mother to see. Oh, because
there are certain that are very nice obituaries. And then
I can decide which one I want. I am gonna
underline some of them too. By the way, So when
Ruth Bader Ginsburg passed away and you said, I want
(31:29):
this one, she was Supreme Court justice, and you read
it word for word, and you said, don't change a thing,
just the name. Why not? Who's gonna remember? Oh, she's
a riot? She is so funny. I think that people
of a certain age have a preoccupation with deaths. You
(31:53):
know what it is there? And I'm ninety. Now, if
you live to ninety, that was a good old age,
and them ninety, I say, I don't know where did
ninety years go? And I like to impress upon everybody,
no matter what the ages. When you get to ninety,
you look back and say, how fast I got to nine? Yes, yes,
(32:16):
I agree. So every day is a gift and and
and don't let anything pass you by because I don't
want to say when I get older, I'm sorry. I
didn't do this. Taken everything you possibly can. I agree.
You gotta live life to the fullest. Every minute counts.
And this podcast, I hope all the grandmother to bring
(32:40):
the myths to Chump to all the grandkids. Live life,
enjoy life, be kind and loving to each other. Remember
you want everybody to say, I miss you, girls, Ray,
I miss you, I miss you. When I don't talk
to you for one day, call your grandmother. As a
duction of I Heart Radio and Superb Entertainment. The hosts
(33:04):
of the show are me Rina Kay and me Ellen Bernstein.
Grodsky created by Meryl Poster, produced and directed by Anna Stump,
with producer abuzafar An, associate producer Emily Maronoff, managing producer
Lindsay Hoffman, and executive producers are Merral Poster, Nikki I
(33:28):
Tore and Mangesh Haatika Door music and mastering by Hamilton
Lighthouser and Anna Stump. Listen, just listen to me. I'm
an old grandmother, So tell everybody you know you've got
to listen to Coy your grandmother
Ellen, how did your morning go? Today? Like every other morning,
I have to put a face on because I can't
let your girls see me without my face. I just
have to tell you that my bill at Macy's for
the makeup for the Today Show was two hundred and
seventy eight dollars. Peter was gonna die when he saw
(00:24):
the bill. To eight dollars were ellipsick, I said, Peter,
I needed a limp pencil, I needed eyebrow pencils. I
needed mascara. Did you tell him you were only on
the Today Show once in a lifetime, the first time
I called it the first time I'm on the Today Show. Okay,
you're very optimistic. Who are we going to hear today? Today,
we're going to hear from Joan, the grandmother, and know
(00:47):
with the granddaughter it should be fun and they just
love each other. They're the best of friends. I can't
wait to get started. Here. We have Joan Mendelssohn. She's
(01:07):
eighty seven years old, full of sass. Yeah, the shame
that she's twenty five. Who asked you how old I was?
I just thought it was important that people know how
much of a life you've lived and how much knowledge
you'll have to share with the world. That's the end
of Hugh Jackman for me. Now we know as I
made these seven thanks. No. It is my most beautiful granddaughter.
(01:30):
She's wonderful and she has a terrific personality and happy
to say she has my hair, gorgeous long blonde brown hair.
Did I do good? Sweet? Huh? You did great? Grandma?
What would you say? Was kind of a moment that
(01:52):
defined our relationship. Oh, I was thrilled because and I
didn't have to speak to your mother. I had you
is perfect, perfect, Sorry, Susan. My grandmother and I have
been super close for a very long time. I think
(02:13):
that we started to reach an exceptionally close level when
she realized that I could have a glass of wine
with her, and that's when she really introduced me to
her world. Right, Grandma, that's it. The only reason for
having the children in the first place was to have
the grandchildren in the second place, so I could get
(02:35):
rid of the children and just be with my grandkids,
the divine. I love them madly. We have a wonderful
time together. My daughter is okay too. You know. As
a kid, she was always there at all of my performances,
and as I've gotten older, you know, I go to
(02:55):
her for dinner once a week. My friends are absolutely
obsessed with my grandmother. So one time, a couple of
friends and I were meeting up for drinks and we
stopped at a couple of different rooftop bars. They all
had insane lines. So I was like, you know what,
my grandma lives across the street. Let's just go grab
a drink at her apartment. And we walked in and
(03:15):
she immediately start sharing her stories and her jokes. And
they look at me, They're like, why wasn't this plan
a She's amazing and I want to hang out with
her all the time. You know, with a parent, I
tend to be a little more reserved with sharing information.
But my grandma, you tell her anything, she forgets it.
So I can kind of just tell her anything anything
I want. You're so lucky. I can't. I don't even
(03:37):
know who you off hav and say, what are we
doing here? Ge? No? She what don't we like to
polish nails? We polish nails, We eat together, We miss
everybody up together. We planned how to get rid of
a bunch of the kids that we don't like together.
(03:59):
We very close. We are very close. I love the relationship.
I love the way that girl loves her grandmother and
the way the grandmother loves her. Yeah. But but but
this grandmother is a funny lady. She's got a good
sense to human To me that you know how important
it's that to humor is absolutely and I love. And
(04:19):
she said, we get rid of the door. It's are
you kidding? I would never say that about my daugh
It's they killmate. That's a funny way to think. I'd say,
you have kids, so when you forget your kids? Remark
you which When we gave my mother a ninety five
birthday party at my niece's house. The next day I
call her and say, Mom, how do you like the party?
(04:41):
She says, what party? It's his mom, the main ballroom
of the Plaza hotel. You you don't remember that party
in one top of the line. She didn't remembers. So
I figured I might as well make a nice party,
let her be happy, let her think it really were
to all. That's right, that's right, Okay, I've just been
(05:05):
handled the part titles and here we go Part one.
Hugh Jackman, is that a grandchild? I want you to
give me one of your elaborate stories that you usually
come up with. Oh you want me to lie? Yes, okay.
(05:26):
Oh I got up this morning. I guess who was
lying next to me? Who? Hugh Jackman? How did assist that?
What do you guys do? Why would I tell you that?
You're busy body? And I'm not answering any more of
those questions. Get a life. I don't have a life.
My life is you. Why don't you tell us a
(05:53):
true story? Now? How about the time you actually met
Paul Newman? I bumped ginches car. Yeah, what happens? He
read to the house in my neighborhood? And what you do?
He stopped the one stop sign in to day. But
and I was madly in love with him always. I
would have to give Hugh Jackman up for him, I
(06:14):
really would. But what happened? Graham? He stopped at the
stop sign, and what I ran into his car. It
was a perfect meeting, and he was so sweet. I
thought he would immediately fall madly in love with me
and get rid of his wife. I mean, well, what's
the point of talking about it? Gone? My one chance
(06:38):
at glory missed? It's okay, now you have Hugh Jackmen
to think about. That's true. I want to make something
very clear. I know he's married and has several children,
maybe five. I don't want him on a permanent basis.
I want his wife to understand that as well. I
(06:59):
just want to borrow him, and when I'm finished with him,
I'm gonna send him back to his wife if he
wants to go. I don't want anything permanent. Did you
tell him this when you met him? She did truly
get to meet him once. I think his wife was there.
Maybe he's laughing in the pics there, so maybe I
(07:20):
did tell him the woman has a fantastic fantasy life.
I'll tell you that. I can't wait till i'm eighty seven.
I've was eighty seven. I don't have things happening. Jackman
in the bed next to me. I let Paul Noman
have to be perfectly honest. His eyes were beautiful, but
(07:40):
I was taller. No, he's not so short. I like
short man. I don't think it's relative right right for me. Listen,
now she's got it's no guide from Bridgeton. Did you
all see him? It's no Renee Page jan Page. Oh yes,
Oh he's beauty. Oh my god, so she can give
(08:02):
up Hugh Jack. Mit, She'll have this new guy now
he's mine, is mine, he is gorgeous. Listen, at this age,
a D seven is not that far from nineties. And
that's how you live when you get to our rage.
A lot of n ands oil in the head, can't
wait in the body. Next up Part two, Ironing and crying, well, crying,
(08:27):
I know, ironing. I don't do so, Grahams. But I
want to go back to college with you. Yes. Tell
me about when you met aunt Lane, Auntie Lane. I
decided to come in as a freshman because I didn't
want to be in the sophomore dorm. So I came
(08:48):
in and there in the launchry room was Auntie Lane.
She's my friend for a hundred years, ironing and crying,
and I said, what's the matter with you? I have
to leave, I shaid, he just got here. What do
you have to leave? Because there are no Jewish people
(09:09):
with my dormitory. I said, I'm Jewish. Well, I was
exhibit A. She dragged me out. I met her parents
and she said, she's jealoush's Jewish. I can stay and
that was it. They let her stay ironing and crying.
(09:29):
She's been doing that for the last fifty six years. So, Grandma,
do you remember this at all? My freshman year of college,
I'm sitting in my dorm room and I got a
call for my high school ex boyfriend. Haven't spoken to
him in a while. I'm like, what's up? He goes,
You're never going to believe who I just bumped into
(09:50):
in the hallways of Baruk. Who your grandma? What the
hell was my grandma doing at school? He's like, she's
trying to figure out how she could sign up for
some art classes. Grandma, do you remember that at all? Yes?
I do. Indeed, I don't believe she ever found the
art classes, but they were. Now she's just to go
get her. You know, that's my motto, you want to
(10:13):
go for it. There were no no Jewish girl sea.
Oh you know that's surprising. Listen, You find Jews wherever
you go. They just have a way of getting in somehow,
I don't know it. And once they get in, they
never leave you alone. Your friends for life. Yeah, but
when I went to college, you know, they were no Jewish.
(10:33):
They were I had my roommate and one other girl,
and that was it. So I went to Syracuse London
Jewish girls with Syracuse. But do you know what, who cares?
My daughter went to American University and she pledged a
sorority that was very Southern. And I was speaking to
my son and he says, you know, mom, we're gonna
have to change our name to Culpepper, right, But do
(10:58):
you know what are You'm all young college kids. You go,
you have fun, I love each other and whatever. And
she had investigated. She wouldn't know to tell you the truth.
But UCAN is a business school. You're not gonna find
Arcolan in the business school. But okay, she didn't know.
She went and she said met somebody thought that was fine.
She does her thing and everybody seems to know her
(11:19):
and love her. And I'm trying to save her little footsteps. Okay,
Part three is up next. Dumbo an Elephant? Grandma? What
was dating like back in the day? Like me, when
I go on a date, I wear jeans and a
T shirt. What would you wear? First of all, nobody
(11:40):
wore jeans. It was still such thing as jeans. People
didn't walk around in jeans. They walked around and skirts
with matching sweaters. It was an ensemble, my dear, And
you looked elegant, well as elegant as a kid could look.
And you wore Bobby's socks and loafers. Did you ever
(12:03):
go out for dinner? No, you did not go to dinner.
That course money. You have to understand. This was right
after the depression. People didn't have money. If you were
going out with somebody wealthy, which I was not, that's
a different circumstances. No, nobody took you out to dinners.
You want to tell us how you and Papa Matt
(12:24):
I finagled it. That's how I got him. Yeah, tell
us he was every girl's dream. He was his nice
Jewish boy and six ft tall and he was about
a hundred and thirty pounds. All the girls loved him. Well,
that's all I had to hear that he now became
(12:46):
a challenge, and I knew this was it. He used
to go off campus every weekend to see another girlfriend,
and I knew where he was going. And one day
he was sitting at coffee shop and I sat right
behind him. He had his hands on his head. I said,
(13:08):
I always thought you were thinking deep thoughts, but now
I know you're nursing a hangover. Well, he said, who
are you? And I told him, and he said, what
is it your business? I said, everything you do is
my business. That was it. After that, it was made
(13:30):
in heaven. He never went off campus again because I
never went off campus again. And I snagged him and
I was not sorry from the first to the day
he died. He was the love of my life. Oh
I miss him. M hmmm, I really do miss him.
(13:53):
So when you and Papa started dating, what kind of
dates did you guys go on? We went dancing. There
was a play surround the corner on Marshall Street where
they had a jukebox and if you had the money,
you could put five cents in and you would have
five songs. I don't think they served alcohol. I'm sure
(14:14):
they did not. There was coke or whatever, and we
had that and everyone was there, all your friends when
they are dancing, and we had a very innocent, very
nice time. Why don't you tell us a little bit
about what he looked like and what your mother said
about it? Oh uh, Glee. Well, you see, he could
(14:36):
fly because his ears were flapping. So I told my
mother how madly in love I was with this guy,
and my mother said, you're madly in love with me.
Looks like dumbbo And I realized she was right. But
I could help that look, and so I did. I
went with him to the barber and I said, listen,
(14:57):
the ears on the side of the head. We can't
cut them off. Let's let the hair grow all around it,
so there'll be no space between the ear and the head.
And that's what we did. He had a full head
of hair, all curly, and it was not shaved, because
in those days the guys used to have their heads
very very short, like a Scott. Yeah, I said, he's
(15:21):
very handsome. Mother, you don't see it, No, she said,
I think he's quite ugly. Well, it took her a while,
but once I got rid of the ears sticking out,
with the hair growing, he was stunning, wasn't he studying?
He was? You picked a good one, you know what.
Of all the podcasts we've heard, she's the only grandmother
(15:45):
that said, you know, I missed Papa. But it was
so nice. She says, I missed him. There was a
nice love affair. Look how nice you mentioned him out.
She made his hair grow over the ears. We all
do things to make them better looking. Well, that's it.
We all have a vision. At once we get the guy,
we start to mold them into that vision. That's it.
(16:07):
Never happens, but we keep trying. Okay, Allen, it's time
for commercial. Nikki is scratching at the door. Gotta get
the dog out. Okay, Crumpet, tell us here comes apart
(16:29):
four marriage and money. Let's see how this is handled
in this marriage. I know how it's handled in my house. So, Grandma,
what was Papa like as a husband and a father?
It was very faithful. It was a different era. I
guess his word was his bond. He was honorable, He
(16:53):
was wonderfull, he really was. He was a pain in
the ass as well, by the way that would be expected.
But he was a very good husband. I think, a
very good father, though I suspect that if he wasn't
as good a father as he should have been, it
was because of the gulf that was his downfall. And
(17:15):
he was very good at He was a wonderful athlete.
And Grandma, how did you used to know when Papa
was mad at you picture in the refrige. You know
that my sister aunt Myra, and she was a spy
for me, and when I was in trouble with Grandpa,
she would call me up and say, your pictures in
(17:36):
the refrigerator. But if things got really bad, then my
picture was in the freezer. And if it was in
the freezer and face down, I should look for another boyfriend.
Because this was over. So tell me about your first job.
I'm curious how did that figure into your marriage. I
(17:58):
worked privately with two students, both of them were deaf.
One student, Richard Mead, who was the first deaf student
to be accepted by m I t he was brilliant.
I worked with them at school and then their parents
was so pleased with the results of my work that
(18:19):
they asked me if I would work every day privately,
which I did, and I made in those days a
lot of money because I worked by the hour. Today
they would stone me. I gave all of my money
to my husband and he said, how much do you
need to live on and run the house and so
(18:41):
and so forth. I said, I think forty dollars a
week will do it, and he gave me forty dollars
and he took several hundred dollars of my money, our money,
my money, and he put it in the bank in
a saving account. But he did do that to save
(19:03):
money for the two of you and your families and
your lives together. He wasn't taking it for himself. Oh no,
of course not. No, no, no, no no. He wasn't
taking my money and going out on the town. No, no, no,
it was a different time. I gave him the money.
Some guys would have just gone and blown the money.
(19:24):
But he was so honorable and so trustworthy. So did
Papa support the fact that you were working that he
appreciate it? Are you kidding? He almost killed me when
I stopped working. I was making more money than he was.
So what should I look for in a man? First
(19:45):
of all, make sure that he's a challenge and everyone
wants him. That's very important. He's got to have something special.
Can't be just an ambishi kid that slumps along. It
be wonderful if he had a lovely imagination. You make
the decision. Don't leave it up to the guy, because
(20:07):
they never make decisions, and they're usually wrong if they
make them, so forget that. But he has to be smart.
He doesn't have to be wealthy. The rest will come
if he's intelligent, and he has to love you more
than you love him. That would be very helpful. So
what would you wish for me when I get married
one day? What do I wish for you? Well? Happiness,
(20:30):
of course, health, happiness, a lot of love of course,
babies that's to be expected. How many babies do you want?
A hundred? You're not going to have a hundred, trust me.
How many do you want? As many as I can handle? Three? Four? Well,
(20:51):
please start now, because I'm not getting any younger. You
could have a baby now, you know. I wouldn't care.
I don't think I'm going to have a baby right now.
Oh ratch, Grandma? Why do you think of Adam? My boyfriends?
How how do you think? I did? I think he's
lovely and he loves you two pieces, which is so nice.
(21:13):
It's so nice. So you like having him around? Of
course I picked someone that you're okay with. Yeah, anyone
that makes you happy. I would be happy with what
he happens to be a very exceptionally wonderful boy. And
don't lose some where you're out, You're out of the will.
Too bad for you. Grandma already have your whole will
on the wall. Because she asked me for a favor,
(21:35):
and I said, well, if I'm gonna do this, you
have to sign this that says Grandma's will, Noah gets everything.
And she signed it, and that's hanging up in our kitchen,
so I don't know if you've got me out of there.
You know, it's so funny. She said something that my
mother used to say to me. She said, you know,
(21:58):
it's nice to have a love relationship, but the man
should always love you a little bit more. And she's right, absolutely,
But I'm just telling you younger girls, marriage is like
a game. You have to know how to play it right,
how to play up to your husband, how not to
play up the oven when give and take. It's a
(22:19):
whole philosophy of how to be married. Yeah, but you
know that ends at a certain point where because once
you got the power, you got the power. You know,
they should have a cause how to be married. There's
little things in marriage that we all old women would
come in with and you'd see it worked out. Make
(22:40):
sure they love you more. Okay, Rida, it's time to
go to a commercial. I hate to switch gears like this,
but who's paying the bills? I'm not gonna be you
and I next up Part five The Gramercy Grandma. I
(23:05):
wonder what this could mean. Grandma, tell us about how
you ended up living in the Grammercy Park Hotel. Oh,
my husband was a lawyer. One of his clients are
owned the hotel, and one day he came back from
Manhattan and he looked so upset. Apparently a couple of
kids were hassling him. They threw his glasses on the
(23:28):
floor and they stepped on them, and he said, you
know what, let's stay there during the week and we'll
go home on the weekends. And that's what we planned
on doing. And then he said, you know what, let's
just stay here and we'll sell our house, which is
what we did, and that's how we got to be
(23:48):
at the Gramercy Park Hotel forever and ever. Yeah, so,
the original owner and management wasn't what it is now,
and when these new owners took over, they turned the
Grammercy Hard Hotel into what it is today. It's this
super hip hotel where all the celebrities stay. And so
my four ft eight grandmother, who was best friends with
(24:09):
all of the doormen there, would come home every day
and they'd let her know who was there weekly i'd
get a call. No, uh, do you know who bouncy is, Grandma?
Remember when Bouncy was in your hotel? Yeah? Who was bouncy?
Bouncy is Beyonce Um a famous singer, Beyonce Bouncy. Nah huh.
(24:29):
And tall sports guys would be staying in the hotel,
she would go knock on their shoulder. You're very tall?
Like yes. So, my cousins and I actually decided to
make an instagram about her life. The Grammarcy Grandma is
what we called it. It didn't start out as a
Hugh Jackman fan page, but it slowly but surely turned
(24:51):
into that did I show it? I've showed you before? Yes?
Did I like it? I think you did? I think
you did. Do we charge? We don't large for Oh
too bad? Oh? You know why relate to her? Because
she said she's four ft in and I was like
four ft nine. My god. We could be a team,
(25:12):
the two of us. But she's killed. I get her.
I get the little lady. Oh she's adorable, she's absolutely
I just see her as like a senior citizen Eloise
at the Grammasee Park Hotel. You know what she she'd
be my competition because people see me, they said, oh,
Dr Roof. They all think I'm Dr Ruth Westimer. She
(25:35):
knows a lot about sex. What I forgot about sex,
you could write a book about, you know, Rita. When
I was much younger, I looked like Beverly Sills. And
I was in the Russian tea room one day and
a couple was sitting at a table near us, and
they kept on staring over, and my sister was with me,
and she said to me, they think of Beverly Sills.
(25:58):
She says, watch and she turns around and she says,
you know, Beverly, we have a lot of things to do.
She says, let's get going. So we go out, and
she went one way. I went the other way, and
I got into a cab and the cab driver he
turned around and he smiled at me, you know, and
he says, I know who you are. He says, but
(26:19):
I know better than to ask. So when I got
out and he says, I can't help it. Can I
have your autograph? I said sure, and he handed me
a piece of paper and I said, you're a terrific driver.
With all my best wishes, Ellen Grodsky, No, I told
you the one minute. The lady, I says, walk into
the subway. Oh, Dr Ruth, Doctor Ruth. I said, no,
(26:42):
I'm not Dr Ruth. Yes you are. I would need
an autograph, and I said, I have no paper and pencil.
She said, bleak lay here. She goes into the supermarket
right there, and I started walking towards the subway and
she comes and she's this is a gods on the strength,
Dr Ruth. I gotta paper. I gotta paper. So I thingured,
oh my god, And if I don't say I'm doctor,
She's going to be so upset. So true enough, I
(27:05):
wrote Dr Ruth west time and she goes running in
the street. I got her autography so I didn't a
miss for she was so happy. Okay, Ruda, this is it.
This is the end, part six, and it's evolving. We
all have to evolve. Let's see how she evolves. I
(27:31):
love that word evolving. Grandma, being a woman when you
were growing up is very different from what being a
woman is like now. What differences do you really see
in that? And what would you have preferred? Women are
their own people, and they do their own thing, and
(27:51):
they make a living, and they go home from work
and they don't expect that somebody is going to be
there cooking for them. Your life is harder then my
life was. We had roles to play, and we understood
what those roles were, and we brought into those roles
(28:11):
and it made our lives easier because we knew what
we were supposed to do. But isn't it kind of
special that I don't have to live by those roles?
I can be whatever it is that I want to be.
It's only special if you wanted to be, if you
buy into it, it's special. What were you like as
(28:34):
a mother? I don't think I was a great mother.
I kind of let them do their own thing most
of the time because I had trust in them. But
you'd have to have the kids said, I don't know,
I have no idea, and you better say the right thing. Kids?
Where are? How do you think you are as a
grandma better than I was as a mother? My little
(28:58):
mushy baby girl, Oh, musty musty grandma. Yeah? So what
makes a good grandmother? I think being a grandmother gives
you a perspective and sense of time. You do not
have infinite number of years, and that this is like
(29:18):
a gift that you get. Whatever you did wrong, you
can make up for with these kids, and it's fun.
How do you think our relationship has evolved now that
I'm an adult. It doesn't evolve now that you're an adult.
It evolves from the moment you opened your eyes. It's
a growing thing. It's like a plant. Can you nurture
(29:40):
it and you water it, and you careful it and
you love it. That's how it works. So your grandkid,
so me, Ben Hank, Sophie, Michael, Annie, Aman's a test, Ruby, Margie.
Do you think that our values and ideas about how
to live life match your own? Well exceed my own? Actually?
(30:01):
Not just magic seed? Because you're very close to one another.
You care about one another. Perfect You guys make me cry.
We love you. Have we surprised you in any way?
(30:22):
Grahams No. I mean I expected you to be good people,
honorable people, and you are and that's all I ask
of you. I mean, you love each other and you
show it, and that's the best thing I can ask.
(30:43):
I just know that all of you make me happy. Well,
you make all of us happy. Gee, you know the
highlight of our week every week is walking through your door,
hearing your stories. Having a drink with you, and we
all feel so lucky to have the chance to spend
all this time with you. Why do you read the
(31:09):
papers obituaries? Tear them out and leave them around the
house for me and my mother to see. Oh, because
there are certain that are very nice obituaries. And then
I can decide which one I want. I am gonna
underline some of them too. By the way, So when
Ruth Bader Ginsburg passed away and you said, I want
(31:29):
this one, she was Supreme Court justice, and you read
it word for word, and you said, don't change a thing,
just the name. Why not? Who's gonna remember? Oh, she's
a riot? She is so funny. I think that people
of a certain age have a preoccupation with deaths. You
(31:53):
know what it is there? And I'm ninety. Now, if
you live to ninety, that was a good old age,
and them ninety, I say, I don't know where did
ninety years go? And I like to impress upon everybody,
no matter what the ages. When you get to ninety,
you look back and say, how fast I got to nine? Yes, yes,
(32:16):
I agree. So every day is a gift and and
and don't let anything pass you by because I don't
want to say when I get older, I'm sorry. I
didn't do this. Taken everything you possibly can. I agree.
You gotta live life to the fullest. Every minute counts.
And this podcast, I hope all the grandmother to bring
(32:40):
the myths to Chump to all the grandkids. Live life,
enjoy life, be kind and loving to each other. Remember
you want everybody to say, I miss you, girls, Ray,
I miss you, I miss you. When I don't talk
to you for one day, call your grandmother. As a
duction of I Heart Radio and Superb Entertainment. The hosts
(33:04):
of the show are me Rina Kay and me Ellen Bernstein.
Grodsky created by Meryl Poster, produced and directed by Anna Stump,
with producer abuzafar An, associate producer Emily Maronoff, managing producer
Lindsay Hoffman, and executive producers are Merral Poster, Nikki I
(33:28):
Tore and Mangesh Haatika Door music and mastering by Hamilton
Lighthouser and Anna Stump. Listen, just listen to me. I'm
an old grandmother, So tell everybody you know you've got
to listen to Coy your grandmother
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