February 1, 2023 • 40 mins
s mud good for the vocal chords? Is “opening night” as disgusting as it sounds? In this episode you'll learn about Human Musicals from comedian Avery Nusbaum and Bethelzda, a giant worm. PLUS, enjoy a special duet to celebrate our last episode before our host takes break to shed her exoskeleton! Theme song by Brooks Allison.
ABOUT SARAH SMALLWOOD PARSONS:
Sarah Smallwood Parsons is a queer comedian and artist in NYC, best known for hosting Characters Welcome (100k+ YouTube subscribers) and her viral video “The Song in Every Musical That No One Likes” (3M views). Check out her TV pilot Forgotten Animals and follow her everywhere @sarahsmallwoodparsons
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Behold. I am Bethelzda, a giant worm like creature that
lives at the bottom of a muddy hole. And this
is my podcast on the surface, where I try to
make sense of the world above with help from human
experts and my sidekick, a cool teen that fell down
(00:31):
my whole. Colteene, say something, I forget how to do math?
All right, we'll work on it, Colteine. Today's topic musical theater.
What is it? Why is it? Is it dangerous? Hopefully
we'll find out from our guest musical theater aficionado, Avery
(00:53):
nuts Bomb. Avery, thank you for being here in the whole.
Oh my goodness, it is a leisure to be here
with you both. Thank you for saying that. Yes, I
just love musical theater and I want to spread it
around the world and share it here with you today.
Oh wow, sounds like a disease. I'm excited. Some would say,
(01:15):
John would say a disease. Some say, oh my god,
And that is once on this island. Avery. Your voice
is beautiful. You have a voice of an angel. Thank
you so much. And your voice is also very unique.
Thank you very much. Dressy. You know I I've been
told I have a certain certain something certain flair in
(01:37):
my vocal tone anyway, every for for myself and my listeners. Okay,
in your own words, what would you say musical theater is?
So that is a loaded question, I will say at first,
and I will say this, when you have a spirit
that needs to be expressed, okay, and the only way
(02:00):
you can express it is not just through words. It
becomes a song. Okay, I'm familiar. I'm familiar with songs. Yes.
And then while you're expressing your emotional life through song,
you're also maybe doing a little tippity tap dance on
the side, tap dance. That's interesting. Yes, you're maybe doing
a jazz square and you are conveying a beautiful story
(02:25):
through the medium of song and dance. Let me tell
you most of those words, I have no idea what
they mean is my first time hearing them. But god,
I'm so glad you're here so you can figure this out. Okay, Okay, great,
let's uh should we hop into her? Oh? First off?
Soho sorry, let me introduce you to my sidekick slash hostage.
(02:47):
Cool teen. It's a cool teen that fell down my
whole Yeah, yeah, hi, Avery, we're so we're so happy
to be visited. Uh, you know, it gets pretty lonely
down here, but we may do also. But those as
far as up dancing goes, you know, you do typically
need feet to do it. But you know when I
tap on your big gelatinous skin and it kind of
(03:09):
jiggles in a way, that's tap dance. Okay, right, should
we've been doing a little tippy tab down here. That's nice? Yeah, yeah,
I like that. Have you have you ever seen musical
theater coot? Uh? Maybe you know. I didn't. I didn't
do a lot of arts and culture stuff, and I
could never audition for the school play because I was
(03:30):
way too cool for that. I was busy going to
my chess tournaments. So and chess is a very cool activity,
yes savory, yes, oh yeah. I definitely think they should
make a musical out of the Queen's Gambit. So there's
a chess musical out there, the Queen's Gambit. No idea
what that is, but it sounds pretty exciting. You know,
(03:52):
I've known some queen bees, for example, and they've put
me through a few gambits, if you know what I'm saying.
Not quite sure? Right, Well, then we're both confused and
you know what, it's a great equalizer. You know, why
don't we Why don't we hop into our first segment? Okay,
this first segment I'm calling what in the bud is this? Alright?
(04:15):
So here's how it works. Okay, Avery, I'm gonna present
you with some words related to a musical theater, Okay,
and then I'll take a guess at what they mean,
and then you can correct me if needed. Cool, very cool, absolutely, okay, great,
here we go. I'm excited. First word, scales Okay, now,
this one's easy. I think scales are the things that
(04:38):
have developed on my soft belly due to what I've
named mud burn. Is that the same thing for human
musical scales? So scales and musical theater actually have to
do with the sequence of notes that are basically I'll
think you a scale right now. I would love that.
(04:58):
M ah. So it's a sequence of notes in an order,
usually ascending, sometimes descending. But unfortunately there is no mud involved.
Unless it's a musical about mud wrestling. Probably there must
be something out there, see that's a musical I could
(05:18):
get into. I think little mud wrestling musical. I I
used to be on the mud wrestling team actually when
I was when I was cool teen's age, which in
warm years is like a month old. That was pretty good.
I miss it, really miss it. But those are there's
a there's a tear in your in your hole. You know,
I miss my missed my fellow grubs. You know, I
(05:40):
miss I missed the feeling of touch. If I'm being honest,
don't touch me, cool tine. That was an invitation. Okay, alright,
let's go into the second folk a word shoe we Okay,
So here we've got the opening night. Okay, So opening
night for me, it's the one night a year that
I opened and drained my slime pockets. Okay, I gotta
(06:01):
get those line baggage drained. That's opening night. Is that
the same thing for musicals? Well, I will say this,
a lot of musical theater people are very horny, So
I do think there is a lot of built up tension. Okay, right,
maybe on the opening night people are sort of releasing
their slime pockets as well. That's that's a lot of
(06:23):
if everybody's doing it, definitely. I I would like to say, though,
of course, opening night is when you've rehearsed for this
musical you're a performer, You've rehearsed, and now you're putting
on the show. Now the show is opening, there's an audience,
and it's the night of all nights to remember. Okay, okay,
let me review. Okay, So musical theater, Musical's right, it's
(06:46):
people expressing themselves through sean. It's a show. There's a
show involved. Absolutely everybody's emptying their shliine pockets and it's
a night you remember. Yes, it's exactly you've you've hit
the nail that I think you're you're almost ready to
be in a musical. I mean, talk about a dream
of mine. I don't know if you know I do
(07:07):
love to sing, but you know, I don't know if
anybody really wants to hear it. Oh I want to
hear it. Okay, Well, I feel put on the spot.
Maybe later we a little nervous. Let's just keep going
with this. Let's keep going with this. Brop. Okay, we
got um oh, we got Mattenee. I'm gonna say this
(07:28):
is like a really fancy matt Yes, uh so Mattenee.
So there's shows at night. Normally shows are at night
on on the Great Broadway. Wow, nighttime over here, we
do nothing because it's pitch black. So that's good to know.
Oh yes, you know, I could maybe get one of
my tech friends to bring you a spotlight or two
(07:49):
to help out. That would be amazing. I'll see what
I can do. Hold on, let me just write that down.
I'm gonna hold you to that. Maybe I won't let
you leave till you bring it, you know. No, no, no,
that's that's funny. But every crazy Yeah okay, um but
basically it's a show usually at two or three in
(08:11):
the afternoon. Okay, great, that makes it's sort of like
um my bathing schedule. You know. It's like once a
week whenever it rains. Sometimes it's at nights, sometimes it's
in a day. You know. Either way, I don't get
very clean. Oh I say, that's that's that's what the
smell is. Yeah, oh yeah, sorry if you didn't realize
that's the mud. It's a mixture of you know what.
(08:32):
You don't want to know what's in it. It's better
if you don't know. All right, let's keep going with
those folks up all right here we go, okay, okay, understudy.
I think that's what cool team has to do when
we drained my slime buckets. The cool Tine has to
study my under if you will, Is that right? Yeah?
I gotta make sure that nothing's wrong with it, no
(08:52):
growth snow, you know, additional parasites, etcetera. Sort of like
a summer job for Cootine. Yeah, but for no money
and for the foreseeable future. That's true. Wow, Wow, that
is a fate of sorts that I personally am excited
to hear about. Do you think do you think my
(09:13):
relationship with Cootine could be used for musical theater? Oh?
Absolutely absolutely. It's it reminds me of of Young Frankenstein
the musical okay, which is based on the movie Young Frankenstein.
No idea. Great, you've got this uh mad scientist who
I think you? You sort of reminded me of a
little bit. And then Coultine, you would be sort of
(09:35):
like Igor, who is the sort of henchman. Yeah, I
see it. I haven't been able to stand up straight
since I fell down this hole, so I do see
myself playing that role. That's true. You gotta kind of
crouch down in case anybody throws anything in here. You know,
you gotta be in running position. Short of all the time.
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Coutine almost gotta taken
(09:57):
out by an old swing set earlier today, I know.
And the saddest thing is I couldn't put it back together,
so it's just more sticks for Bethel's they which after
players stick games. Wow? Um well what was the word again? Oh? Sorry,
the word was understudy? Yes, understudy? Um, so, understudy is
(10:21):
basically where there's a lead or not, there are characters.
There are characters in a musical, yes, go on, and
basically people sometimes cover those roles just in case the
actor who's performing those roles get sick, go on vacation. Okay,
we get sick a lot down here, so that would
(10:42):
make sense. Oh absolutely, could you could both do with
some good understudies? Cool teen? I mean if another cool
teen falls down here or even are not cool teen,
you know, maybe they could help you pick up some
of the slack. Yeah yeah, maybe even they could fully
replace me and I could return to me. I think,
I think probably until you get me out of here,
you're gonna go anywhere my friends ship. Yes, and normally
(11:03):
the people return to the rules, yes, yes, yes, after
the understudy goes on. So even if you got a
day off, you'd still be down here. Okay, alright, I
like this out of that, Let's do the next book
a world. Okay, here we go. This is Oh, this
is a curtain call. A curtain call, I'm gonna say.
I'm gonna say this is like a really shifty secretive
(11:25):
phone call that happens behind a curtain. Cool team makes
a bunch of curtain calls on their on their cell
phone whenever they've got service, and minus the curtain, they
sort of just faced the wall and can kind of
hear everything they're saying. But is that a curtain call? Well,
let me see if I can put this into something
that makes a little bit more sense for you. Oh, perfect,
because I am a worm. Yes, and and you know
(11:48):
that I'm going to use you know, whole language. Okay,
So basically, you know the people in the show, they've
been doing their parts, so they've been going through the underground.
They've really been going through it. I used to go
through the underground when I was small enough to still
break the surface, but not anymore. Well, basically, they do
(12:10):
end up breaking the surface, and they end up coming
to the other side of the story. That is the
show interesting and now that they've reached the sunlight. Right,
they get accolades and people are waiting on the other
side to cheer them on. Great. I have to be
honest with you, I think that took away some of
(12:30):
my understanding. I feel slightly dumber about musical theater. But
you know what, it's not you. It's not you. It's
definitely me. You know, you're the expert. I'm the learner.
It's a teaching moment. But okay, I'll get it. Let's
still understanding communication styles of course. Yeah, okay, so this one,
this one is a leading role. So I'm gonna guess.
(12:53):
I'm gonna guess that's the first of many segments on
your Body, for example, have thirty two. So I'm gonna
go with the role that you lead with uh, you know,
it's it's a little close. You know, if if if
the if the show is a body of people, then
the person who's really the protagonist or the person who
(13:15):
um maybe sings the most, says the most. We follow
that character the most. You know, they're doing most of
the heavy lifting of the show. So it is the
role of the person to lead the rest of the body.
Avery they say, if you can't do teach and let
me tell you, based on your singing, you can do,
(13:36):
my friend, you can do by that, I mean, don't teach.
I'm just kidding. I'm just skidding with you. Avery, you
get it. Contine, do you have any musical theater related
vocab you want to patch by Avery? Yeah, I'm pretty
sure I know what this one is. I'm pretty sure
it's gonna you know, when a woman's body gets the
(13:58):
eggs ready. But a standing ovation, Oh yeah, yeah, So
a standing ovation in a musical theater is basically when
you know someone has done something so miraculous that the
audience is getting up on their feet and clapping and
giving that person the most amazing accolades, and it's like
(14:20):
a magical moment. So it's, you know, magical moment, not
far off from what you know. Let me ask, Let
me ask for someone like me or doesn't have hands,
what would be appropriate for me to do if I were,
you know, in the in the theater. And I love
what I shall. Well, I'm really loving the way that
your tail sort of curves. And I really think, sorry,
(14:45):
I mean, I don't is that overstepping to comment on
your physical form? No, thank you? I just I actually
might really love your hair. I just want to put
that out there. Thank you so much. Cooteene. Look away,
I'm looking away. I'm looking away, all right, now you
(15:05):
can look back, look back, because I need you to
understand and help with the clapping, because basically I would say,
move your tail up and down and then slap the
rest of your big body. Okay, so kind of like dish. Yes, oh,
can you just you're just getting a little bit of
slot that comes from the territory, right, But that's it,
(15:31):
that's it. Anything for the sake of theater. Absolutely all right, Coolteene,
you got any other vocab you want to go over? Yeah.
(15:54):
I once met a gruff woman named Peg and she
said she was a stage manager. So I'm assuming that
means lesbian. That's a good question. Yeah, yeah, you know
you're probably uh not wrong. Um no, um. Peg is
a dear friend of mine. You know Peg, I know Peg,
I know Peg. She's actually she's done Lion King, she's
(16:15):
done Wicked, she's done a Lad and she's really doing
the Disney circuit right now. And uh, she's pretty badass.
Stage managers are the glue that hold together the whole
entire show, okay, or the slime that holds my tail
in the muddy floor together. Yeah, yes, the gelatinous group,
if you will, I love it. Did I answer your
(16:38):
question anymore? Yeah? Okay. This is a combination of my
uncle and aunt's names Macbeth, mac and Beth. Yeah, that's
my uncle and my aunt serendipitous because Macbeth. It's an incredible,
incredible play written by, of course, the one and only Shakespeare,
(16:58):
William Shakespeare him sound so not not a musical, not
a musical, but see it. But how dare you bring
up anything that is not cool? Team? We're going to
talk about this later, but go ahead. I didn't know
that was the whole we're gonna talk about. We're gonna
talk about Eric. I'm sorry, all right, go ahead, Avery. Well,
I I do think there really should be a musical
(17:19):
version of every Shakespeare play. Unfortunately, I don't think there
is a Macbeth one. Well, hey, I mean, if we
get you and Peg and me and cool teen together,
I don't see where we couldn't make a all musicals
just saying all right, well, let me whip something up.
I can get a few sheet music, grab that spotlight
my friend. All right, but sure you were saying, uh no, basically, uh,
(17:40):
it's it's pretty cool that your aunt and uncle are
Mac Andbeth. I would I would also say be careful
because it is cursed. It's cursed, it's cursed. Then we
don't say that. Oh my god, the podcast just gonna fail.
I'm ruined. Oh gosh. Anyone who's listening, Um, just know
that it's we're just talking about the play and we
haven't performed it. Okay, so you think we're in the clear.
(18:04):
We're in the clear. All right, Thank worm, Thank worm.
We're in the clear. We say thank worm because you
know worms don't famously don't have a god. So thank worm. Alright.
I love it. Okay, I'll be honest, I feel like
I'm only halfway there. But that's all right, because we're
(18:24):
gonna pop into our next segment that I'm calling musical theater.
Musical theater. Okay, So Avery, here's how it works. Okay,
I'm gonna give you a series of scenarios okay, submitted
by myself Quotine in our listeners, and we want you
to say whether they are or are not musical theater. Cool,
(18:46):
very cool, Alright, let's get this going. Okay, let's do it.
Let's do it. Oh yeah, I love that voice. Alright, first, hup,
we got fiddler on the roof musical theater or not
musical theory at musical theater. Okay, absolutely great, checking that off.
All right, let's try this next one. A fiddler on
(19:08):
a roof musical theater. Musical theater really depends, really depends
on what on whether or not there is in fact
a spotlight on this fiddler on this roof. Okay, So
that's what distinguishes the musical theater fiddlers from the regular fiddlers,
because regular fiddlers, they're just doing it for ships and giggles. Yeah,
(19:33):
don't fucking swear on my show. Okay, don't swear on
my goddamn show. That's actually a game I like to
play when I hear a little kind of skirting noises
from over in the corner. I tried to guess whether
Bethelsa's having the ships or the giggles. That was pretty good,
Gold you know, like that one. Thank you, Just so
you know it's the shift. I rarely giggle unless we're
(19:54):
recording the podcast. Yeah, alright, let's let's go to this
next scenario already. All right, Okay, here we go, a
couple arguing in public musical theater or not musical theater.
If we're in tic tic boom, the musical musical theater.
If we're not tic tic booming, if we're not tictic booming,
(20:16):
not musical theater, not musical theater. Okay, great, alright, let's
go to this next one. We got when you put
a show on for your parents in your living room
musical theater, musical theater, musical theater. Wow, okay, you got
it right away. I had to jump in. Is just
something you've done, yes, when I was younger. Actually, I
(20:39):
used to stop Thanksgiving um every year and put on
a combination of any musical theater songs we wanted to
put on, normally from Wicked and normally the song what
is this feeling? Okay, I'm writing it down. I got
to write my mouth. Go ahead. Oh no, that's fine.
(20:59):
I also write it down for why isn't it cool?
Do you know what I can do it? Thank you
very much? Okay, it's pretty good. I'm pretty good in
my mouth. I can't wait to hear that voice. Then,
oh yeah, maybe I'm nervous alright, I don't make me sing. Well,
I'll be here with you, so don't even worry about it,
(21:22):
all right, I don't think about it. I don't think
about it. Yes, but I used to put on show
as musical theater. Let me ask, if you want to
write your own musical, what would it be called? That
is a great question, thank you. I'm tried my best.
I would have to say the title the musical would
be called Sparkly and Pink. The musical sparkling pink. You know,
(21:48):
sometimes I get sparkly and pink when the light hits
me just right, you know, I start a shimmer. It's
I look beautiful for about five seconds, and then it's
you know, back to worm. I'll have to come by
and then see that one time. Thank you. But what
would it be about sparkling pink? Um? I think it
would be uh an autobiographical uh story of my life
(22:11):
and how I've come into my own my own power
and uh. It would be um embracing femininity and also
understanding femininity in the context of stereotypes in the world. Listen,
I'm just a worm. But from where I'm squiggling, that
(22:32):
sounds like a great show. Thank you so much, i'd
get you free tickets. Of course. Well that'd be great.
You know, I can't escape the whole at the moment,
but once I do, you know, i'd be front row
ruining the view for everybody. Absolutely. All right, let's go.
Let let's go this next scenario. Let's see a really
crunchy leaf. Musical theater or not musical theater. I have
(22:55):
to tell you why I'm stumped on this one. I
really think, you know, at first, it's not musical theater, okay,
but then you know, if you start to see the
world in a sort of musical sort of way, the
crunch of a leaf could really be the percussion that
was needed for the day, an instrument of shorts, an
instrument um, sort of that extra flavor. You know, we
(23:17):
could probably put together. It's called an orchestra, right when
people play look at you? Yeah there, you know, I try.
I try. So maybe we can make an orchestra out
of all the garbage ship that's been thrown down here. Yeah,
I mean we got crunchy leaves, right, yeah, we got some.
We got a cool whip container. I bet when you
(23:39):
hit this is a nice noise. She ye oh yeah,
that's pretty nice. So yeah, I think I've been leaning
on what I think isn't half eaten hot pocket. Oh yeah,
that's my half eaten hot pocket. Sorry, I left it
on the chair. The chair made out of mud. Yes,
but that could be an instrument. It coold, Okay, Yeah,
I feel squishy sound. And when the mud leaks on
(24:02):
our collection of microwaves, it goes Oh yeah, I almost
forgot about our collection of microwaves. Yeah, that ding would
make for a good good orchestra section, the ding section.
I like that. Alright, let's see Okay, I gotta the
orchestra is down in a pit. Well, I feel seen.
(24:24):
I'm just gonna say it. I feel seen. Great, So
I could just be in the pit when I come
to your show. Oh my gosh, you know, I'm we'd
love to get you on. Maybe we can get you
on that cool webcam. I would love that. I'm gonna
start practicing. Alright, Okay, so I got I got two
more all let's see. Um Okay, a fart that started
a low pitch, it ends on a high note. Musical theater.
(24:47):
I'm not musical theater. Musical theater. Great, you're that one
seemed obvious. I'll just move right along. Here's my last one. Okay,
when a group of children come to the edge of
your whole and sing this song, don't go down into
that whole filled with mud and bugs and fowls. Don't
go down into that whole. There's a big, disgusting woman
(25:09):
worm down there. Musical theater or not musical theater. I'm
gonna say, the lyrics are a little bit far fetched. Um,
but musical theater. You know what I told him the
same thing. I said, the tunes pretty good. You gotta
work on the lyrics. It's just it's obvious, right it is.
Thank you for saying that. But musical theater. Musical theater. Okay, great,
(25:33):
Well that's all I got. Coutine. You've got any scenarios, yeah,
you know, unless they camp when everybody sings, I hope
you've had the time of your life and starts crying
and apologizes for how they've treated me. Is that musical theater? Oh?
Good one, That is a good one. And musical theater. Absolutely,
that is musical theater. That is probably one of the
(25:56):
most musical theater things you've said. Oh wow, I mean
I would love to watch it. Yes, I just I
just think about leaving. I did go to theater camp,
and I think about leaving this theater camp. Cotine, you
ran away from camp. That's how you fell in the whole. Yeah, wow,
tell us about theater camp. Well, um, you know, I
(26:16):
think about how we practically French kissed at the end
of camp after doing very much. What you said is
the French is a French kiss when you kiss with
a little mustache on. Uh, that's that's gonna be part
of it. Okay, great, especially if you're kissing Pierre Anitatomus
who was the French camper? All right he was? Um,
(26:41):
but yes, musical theater absolutely great. What else you got, Cotine? Uh?
What about rebooting some intellectual property from the Marvel Cinematic
universe in a really high value production that ends in
the deaths of multiple people? Is that musical theater? What
the fun? Did you just say? Yeah? What? I'm sorry?
(27:02):
Can you say it one more time? The whole thing? No?
Thank Cotine? What about no do it? What about when
you reboot intellectual property from the Marvel Cinematic universe in
a really kind intensity production that ends in the deaths
(27:23):
and injuries of multiple people? Is that musical theater, I'm
gonna have to say, um, unfortunately, yes, that is musical theater. Uh.
Spider Man the musical killed a few. Wow, spider Man.
That sounds like someone i'd be friends with. Warm and
spider Man. You know, wait, maybe if you bite me,
(27:46):
I'll get your magical wormpowers. Coltine, We've been over this.
I don't have teeth. Okay, damn it, We've tried. It
just ended up with me gumming your arm for like
an hour. Okay, Yes, it felt good though, Yeah, that's
why I never did it again. All Right, I have
another one. I have another one. Okay, great? What is it?
(28:07):
What about the racially driven gang wars of the nineteen
fifties is that musical theater? Wow? Um, this is above
my slimy head. Go ahead, avery, musical theater. Wow theater.
That also makes me think of there's a musical called
bugsy Malone, and that is twenties gangsters who shoot people,
(28:29):
but instead of shooting people with bullets, they shoot people
with pie. Well, so here's what I'm Here's what I'm
kind of getting about musical theater is that, as long
as it's got a musical element, pretty much anything can
be theater. Isn't that beautiful? That is so beautiful? Interesting? Interesting,
you know I'm doing Maybe, you know, maybe I can
(28:51):
have a show about a big worm that lives in
a hole in a cool teen that they have a
love hit relationship with. Yes, the advent terms of starting
a podcast. Honestly, that's not so different from the musical
I I said, I wanted to write. That's true. You know,
you're coming into your power, coming into that power. I
don't know what that means, but I like to out
of it. You got any you got any more scenario?
(29:14):
School team before we move on? Yeah, what about when
a group of children comes to the edge of the
hole and says, where are you? Where are you? Never mind?
We don't care God, the kids just come to the
hole and sing. It's like, I don't know who asked
him to. Yeah, but that group they have talent because
that song. I think their name was thin. Their name
(29:36):
was Search Party? Is that right? Or was it search
and Rescue something like that, something like that. Yeah, they
came in so briefly, you know, so so briefly, and
they were calling out to someone. I forget, I forget
the name. I don't know, but Oh was that was
that earlier today? Oh? Yeah, it happens all the time. Yeah,
(29:56):
because I think actually I saw them doing some jazz
squares while they were doing that. Oh wow, cool teen.
Maybe they're they're looking for you again, Maybe they maybe
they re up to the search. Maybe there's been uh
maybe one of our previous guests, you know, started a
little rumor that I was still a live down here,
and it gave some people hope, and they're finally gonna
come find me and escape me out of here. I
(30:18):
certainly hope not. I certainly hope not because I don't
want to be alone anymore. So you'd miss me? I mean,
I wouldn't I mean, and that I'd be furious you
left the whole without me. Yet, Well that's not what
you said. Would I have a vendetta? What you always say?
But just then, would I spend years training to go
(30:40):
to the surface and assassinate you? Yes, So if that's
what missing you is, then absolutely sure? Sure sure sure
you said that you'd be lonely. Fine, I miss you
a little bit. There we go. That's what I wanted
to hear. Don't make a thing out of it. Okay,
I'm looking away don't make a thing out of it,
or I won't let you play with the sticks. Deal.
(31:04):
But I'm I'm glad I witnessed that moment. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry you had to hear that. That was That
was fun. We try not to mix the personal with
the business. Yeah it's hard. You know, we're acquaintances, but
we also work together. Now show it's hard. I don't
overlap in the sections of our lives. Anyway. That was
my last That was my last great avery. I mean,
(31:26):
I think I've got a good grasp on musical theater
and I'm absolutely through. Oh my gosh, go tell all
your friends. I mean that, I'm so glad. I'm so glad.
Go tell all my what all of your friends, all
of your friends? What's a friend? It's um do you
know what? This were another for another time. I'll have
a friend expert come on, you know, for musical theater.
(31:49):
I don't want I don't want to burden you with
that question because it seems loaded. Alright, well, I'm excited.
(32:09):
Maybe we just hop into our third segment alright, which
I'm calling for those that gets her dirty. All right now,
for this segment, we're gonna do something different. I'm very
excited about it. Okay, so we're gonna take a brief break, right,
We're gonna stop recording. Then Avery and I are gonna
go rehearse what's called a musical duet, which I think
(32:33):
is a song with two people. Correct? Correct? Alright? Does
one person in a worm also work in this scenario?
It absolutely has to. Okay, great, I'm so excited. I'm nervous.
I'm so nervous to sing with you, Avery. Alright, so
we're gonna we're gonna stop recording, and then we'll be
right back. Alright, alright, we're back. Oh, Avery and I
(32:59):
have been. We're hear sing our little segmented booties off,
and I'm I'm really excited. Um uh, let's see, uh, cooteen,
do you wanna intro Avery and I in our song?
And now, creatures of the mud, put your appendages or
(33:19):
tails together for but fells of the muddy and avering
us bombed the pink and sparkly we go. I'm too excited.
Oh my gosh, sisters, sisters, there were never such devoting sisters.
I'm a giant worm down in a hole, that's true.
(33:42):
But pat doesn't stop me from loving you, carrying, sharing
every little thing that we are wearing. When a certain
gentelman arrived from Rome, she wore my extra skeleton and
ice dad home home games. Whoever, who is it? Together?
(34:05):
She slimmier than a suity hall. I can't help it.
Two different bodies, but both total hollies, you know. So
I'm a living feet dull. You are. Those who see
us always seem to want to get between us. Many
men have tried to let it it up, but no
(34:27):
one cap and the government tried to capture me to study.
Lord help the mister who humes between me and my sister,
and Lord help the sister who comes between me and
my man. You know. The other day two men approached
(34:49):
us and one said to me, what's happening to it?
Hell rude, I know. Then the other one threw a
net over me and tried to show me to the circus.
Da pickle, he sis not men? Who's there? Me? Sorry?
I just realized you aren't wearing any lipstick. Well, you know,
(35:09):
it's hard when you don't have any lips. You know.
They say the early bird gets the worm, but birds
tend to flee from her. It's my big personality. I've
got one. How can you tell which end of a
worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see
which end laughs? Um no, that's like really fucked up.
(35:38):
Oh types of weather. He sick together, she'll fry if
she's out in the sob do it? Do different monies?
Both total horties, you know. So I breathe through my skin.
That's true. When she's malting, people find me totally disgusted.
(36:01):
But under all that slimer all a sister ever needs.
Thank you for saying that. Nor help the lister who
blows between me and my sister, and Lord help the
sister who goes between me and my man. Sister, sisters
(36:35):
don't come between me and my man who I don't know.
I'm so good. That was exhilarating. Oh my gosh, I
mean we just bounced off each other. That was magic, Avery.
What was that thing we did? Were we sang notes
that sounded good together? It was harmonizing, harmonizing. Wow, I
(36:59):
love that. I love that very much. You're you're pretty good, Avery,
stob cool teen is watching. I'm just being honest. I'd
look away, but I honestly can't. I am enraptured by that. Performance.
You know, Avery, sometimes you know, if you want to
come back ever cool teen could have put their fingers
(37:21):
in their ears and close their eyes and uh, I
don't know, maybe we could do another type of do
it or something another. Forget it, never mind, forget it,
never mind, never mind. I didn't mean. I'm just kidding.
I'm kidding. We should keep our relationship professional for the
musicals we're gonna write. Absolutely, I'm not in the market
(37:42):
for anything other than a musical theater partner. Oh my god,
me either, yeah, me either. I love being Shingle, Yeah,
I love it. Yeah. Well, Avery, this was fantastic. Every
Is there anything you'd like to plug, anything you're working on,
anything at all. I'd love to plug my Instagram great, yes,
(38:03):
which is uh the Cosmic Dreamer Queen. And I'd also
like to plug that I'm writing a musical. Yes, I
am writing a musical. How dare you keep this from us?
And it is? Um I'll give you a little elevator
pitch about it. But it's basically about aliens who heard
(38:27):
music from the Golden Voyager and they don't like it,
so they come to Earth destroy Earth. That I get,
But then they hear musical theater and they fall in
love with earth music because of musical theater. Oh, please
let me audition, Please let me audition for an alien
please please, I beg you absolutely, just have your agent
(38:48):
call us and we will absolutely. Okay, great, my agent
is cool. Teen? Is that all right? Cool? Teen? We'll
we'll be in touch. All right. Well, we got to
discuss rates up top. You get nothing. I think that's
that's fair unbelievable. Well, folks, that is our episode, more specifically,
(39:08):
our last episode, at least for the time being, because
I have to shed my exoskeleton and it is very
complicated and painful and takes forever. Yeah, but hopefully we'll
be back soon. Oh yeah, it's a really dark time
when but fells to sheds exoskeleton. So if if anyone's
listening and you stumble upon a deep hole in the
(39:31):
woods near a camp that was supposed to be, you know,
a dump for bile hazards, please please please put a
really long ladder down. But if not, stay moddy, everybody. Sisters, sisters,
there were never such devoted sisters, never had to have
(39:54):
a chaperon. No, sir, I'm here to keep mid on
her here carrying, sharing every little thing that we are wearing.
When a certain gentleman a wrong from wrong, she wore
the dress and I stayed on
Behold. I am Bethelzda, a giant worm like creature that
lives at the bottom of a muddy hole. And this
is my podcast on the surface, where I try to
make sense of the world above with help from human
experts and my sidekick, a cool teen that fell down
(00:31):
my whole. Colteene, say something, I forget how to do math?
All right, we'll work on it, Colteine. Today's topic musical theater.
What is it? Why is it? Is it dangerous? Hopefully
we'll find out from our guest musical theater aficionado, Avery
(00:53):
nuts Bomb. Avery, thank you for being here in the whole.
Oh my goodness, it is a leisure to be here
with you both. Thank you for saying that. Yes, I
just love musical theater and I want to spread it
around the world and share it here with you today.
Oh wow, sounds like a disease. I'm excited. Some would say,
(01:15):
John would say a disease. Some say, oh my god,
And that is once on this island. Avery. Your voice
is beautiful. You have a voice of an angel. Thank
you so much. And your voice is also very unique.
Thank you very much. Dressy. You know I I've been
told I have a certain certain something certain flair in
(01:37):
my vocal tone anyway, every for for myself and my listeners. Okay,
in your own words, what would you say musical theater is?
So that is a loaded question, I will say at first,
and I will say this, when you have a spirit
that needs to be expressed, okay, and the only way
(02:00):
you can express it is not just through words. It
becomes a song. Okay, I'm familiar. I'm familiar with songs. Yes.
And then while you're expressing your emotional life through song,
you're also maybe doing a little tippity tap dance on
the side, tap dance. That's interesting. Yes, you're maybe doing
a jazz square and you are conveying a beautiful story
(02:25):
through the medium of song and dance. Let me tell
you most of those words, I have no idea what
they mean is my first time hearing them. But god,
I'm so glad you're here so you can figure this out. Okay, Okay, great,
let's uh should we hop into her? Oh? First off?
Soho sorry, let me introduce you to my sidekick slash hostage.
(02:47):
Cool teen. It's a cool teen that fell down my
whole Yeah, yeah, hi, Avery, we're so we're so happy
to be visited. Uh, you know, it gets pretty lonely
down here, but we may do also. But those as
far as up dancing goes, you know, you do typically
need feet to do it. But you know when I
tap on your big gelatinous skin and it kind of
(03:09):
jiggles in a way, that's tap dance. Okay, right, should
we've been doing a little tippy tab down here. That's nice? Yeah, yeah,
I like that. Have you have you ever seen musical
theater coot? Uh? Maybe you know. I didn't. I didn't
do a lot of arts and culture stuff, and I
could never audition for the school play because I was
(03:30):
way too cool for that. I was busy going to
my chess tournaments. So and chess is a very cool activity,
yes savory, yes, oh yeah. I definitely think they should
make a musical out of the Queen's Gambit. So there's
a chess musical out there, the Queen's Gambit. No idea
what that is, but it sounds pretty exciting. You know,
(03:52):
I've known some queen bees, for example, and they've put
me through a few gambits, if you know what I'm saying.
Not quite sure? Right, Well, then we're both confused and
you know what, it's a great equalizer. You know, why
don't we Why don't we hop into our first segment? Okay,
this first segment I'm calling what in the bud is this? Alright?
(04:15):
So here's how it works. Okay, Avery, I'm gonna present
you with some words related to a musical theater, Okay,
and then I'll take a guess at what they mean,
and then you can correct me if needed. Cool, very cool, absolutely, okay, great,
here we go. I'm excited. First word, scales Okay, now,
this one's easy. I think scales are the things that
(04:38):
have developed on my soft belly due to what I've
named mud burn. Is that the same thing for human
musical scales? So scales and musical theater actually have to
do with the sequence of notes that are basically I'll
think you a scale right now. I would love that.
(04:58):
M ah. So it's a sequence of notes in an order,
usually ascending, sometimes descending. But unfortunately there is no mud involved.
Unless it's a musical about mud wrestling. Probably there must
be something out there, see that's a musical I could
(05:18):
get into. I think little mud wrestling musical. I I
used to be on the mud wrestling team actually when
I was when I was cool teen's age, which in
warm years is like a month old. That was pretty good.
I miss it, really miss it. But those are there's
a there's a tear in your in your hole. You know,
I miss my missed my fellow grubs. You know, I
(05:40):
miss I missed the feeling of touch. If I'm being honest,
don't touch me, cool tine. That was an invitation. Okay, alright,
let's go into the second folk a word shoe we Okay,
So here we've got the opening night. Okay, So opening
night for me, it's the one night a year that
I opened and drained my slime pockets. Okay, I gotta
(06:01):
get those line baggage drained. That's opening night. Is that
the same thing for musicals? Well, I will say this,
a lot of musical theater people are very horny, So
I do think there is a lot of built up tension. Okay, right,
maybe on the opening night people are sort of releasing
their slime pockets as well. That's that's a lot of
(06:23):
if everybody's doing it, definitely. I I would like to say, though,
of course, opening night is when you've rehearsed for this
musical you're a performer, You've rehearsed, and now you're putting
on the show. Now the show is opening, there's an audience,
and it's the night of all nights to remember. Okay, okay,
let me review. Okay, So musical theater, Musical's right, it's
(06:46):
people expressing themselves through sean. It's a show. There's a
show involved. Absolutely everybody's emptying their shliine pockets and it's
a night you remember. Yes, it's exactly you've you've hit
the nail that I think you're you're almost ready to
be in a musical. I mean, talk about a dream
of mine. I don't know if you know I do
(07:07):
love to sing, but you know, I don't know if
anybody really wants to hear it. Oh I want to
hear it. Okay, Well, I feel put on the spot.
Maybe later we a little nervous. Let's just keep going
with this. Let's keep going with this. Brop. Okay, we
got um oh, we got Mattenee. I'm gonna say this
(07:28):
is like a really fancy matt Yes, uh so Mattenee.
So there's shows at night. Normally shows are at night
on on the Great Broadway. Wow, nighttime over here, we
do nothing because it's pitch black. So that's good to know.
Oh yes, you know, I could maybe get one of
my tech friends to bring you a spotlight or two
(07:49):
to help out. That would be amazing. I'll see what
I can do. Hold on, let me just write that down.
I'm gonna hold you to that. Maybe I won't let
you leave till you bring it, you know. No, no, no,
that's that's funny. But every crazy Yeah okay, um but
basically it's a show usually at two or three in
(08:11):
the afternoon. Okay, great, that makes it's sort of like
um my bathing schedule. You know. It's like once a
week whenever it rains. Sometimes it's at nights, sometimes it's
in a day. You know. Either way, I don't get
very clean. Oh I say, that's that's that's what the
smell is. Yeah, oh yeah, sorry if you didn't realize
that's the mud. It's a mixture of you know what.
(08:32):
You don't want to know what's in it. It's better
if you don't know. All right, let's keep going with
those folks up all right here we go, okay, okay, understudy.
I think that's what cool team has to do when
we drained my slime buckets. The cool Tine has to
study my under if you will, Is that right? Yeah?
I gotta make sure that nothing's wrong with it, no
(08:52):
growth snow, you know, additional parasites, etcetera. Sort of like
a summer job for Cootine. Yeah, but for no money
and for the foreseeable future. That's true. Wow, Wow, that
is a fate of sorts that I personally am excited
to hear about. Do you think do you think my
(09:13):
relationship with Cootine could be used for musical theater? Oh?
Absolutely absolutely. It's it reminds me of of Young Frankenstein
the musical okay, which is based on the movie Young Frankenstein.
No idea. Great, you've got this uh mad scientist who
I think you? You sort of reminded me of a
little bit. And then Coultine, you would be sort of
(09:35):
like Igor, who is the sort of henchman. Yeah, I
see it. I haven't been able to stand up straight
since I fell down this hole, so I do see
myself playing that role. That's true. You gotta kind of
crouch down in case anybody throws anything in here. You know,
you gotta be in running position. Short of all the time.
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Coutine almost gotta taken
(09:57):
out by an old swing set earlier today, I know.
And the saddest thing is I couldn't put it back together,
so it's just more sticks for Bethel's they which after
players stick games. Wow? Um well what was the word again? Oh? Sorry,
the word was understudy? Yes, understudy? Um, so, understudy is
(10:21):
basically where there's a lead or not, there are characters.
There are characters in a musical, yes, go on, and
basically people sometimes cover those roles just in case the
actor who's performing those roles get sick, go on vacation. Okay,
we get sick a lot down here, so that would
(10:42):
make sense. Oh absolutely, could you could both do with
some good understudies? Cool teen? I mean if another cool
teen falls down here or even are not cool teen,
you know, maybe they could help you pick up some
of the slack. Yeah yeah, maybe even they could fully
replace me and I could return to me. I think,
I think probably until you get me out of here,
you're gonna go anywhere my friends ship. Yes, and normally
(11:03):
the people return to the rules, yes, yes, yes, after
the understudy goes on. So even if you got a
day off, you'd still be down here. Okay, alright, I
like this out of that, Let's do the next book
a world. Okay, here we go. This is Oh, this
is a curtain call. A curtain call, I'm gonna say.
I'm gonna say this is like a really shifty secretive
(11:25):
phone call that happens behind a curtain. Cool team makes
a bunch of curtain calls on their on their cell
phone whenever they've got service, and minus the curtain, they
sort of just faced the wall and can kind of
hear everything they're saying. But is that a curtain call? Well,
let me see if I can put this into something
that makes a little bit more sense for you. Oh, perfect,
because I am a worm. Yes, and and you know
(11:48):
that I'm going to use you know, whole language. Okay,
So basically, you know the people in the show, they've
been doing their parts, so they've been going through the underground.
They've really been going through it. I used to go
through the underground when I was small enough to still
break the surface, but not anymore. Well, basically, they do
(12:10):
end up breaking the surface, and they end up coming
to the other side of the story. That is the
show interesting and now that they've reached the sunlight. Right,
they get accolades and people are waiting on the other
side to cheer them on. Great. I have to be
honest with you, I think that took away some of
(12:30):
my understanding. I feel slightly dumber about musical theater. But
you know what, it's not you. It's not you. It's
definitely me. You know, you're the expert. I'm the learner.
It's a teaching moment. But okay, I'll get it. Let's
still understanding communication styles of course. Yeah, okay, so this one,
this one is a leading role. So I'm gonna guess.
(12:53):
I'm gonna guess that's the first of many segments on
your Body, for example, have thirty two. So I'm gonna
go with the role that you lead with uh, you know,
it's it's a little close. You know, if if if
the if the show is a body of people, then
the person who's really the protagonist or the person who
(13:15):
um maybe sings the most, says the most. We follow
that character the most. You know, they're doing most of
the heavy lifting of the show. So it is the
role of the person to lead the rest of the body.
Avery they say, if you can't do teach and let
me tell you, based on your singing, you can do,
(13:36):
my friend, you can do by that, I mean, don't teach.
I'm just kidding. I'm just skidding with you. Avery, you
get it. Contine, do you have any musical theater related
vocab you want to patch by Avery? Yeah, I'm pretty
sure I know what this one is. I'm pretty sure
it's gonna you know, when a woman's body gets the
(13:58):
eggs ready. But a standing ovation, Oh yeah, yeah, So
a standing ovation in a musical theater is basically when
you know someone has done something so miraculous that the
audience is getting up on their feet and clapping and
giving that person the most amazing accolades, and it's like
(14:20):
a magical moment. So it's, you know, magical moment, not
far off from what you know. Let me ask, Let
me ask for someone like me or doesn't have hands,
what would be appropriate for me to do if I were,
you know, in the in the theater. And I love
what I shall. Well, I'm really loving the way that
your tail sort of curves. And I really think, sorry,
(14:45):
I mean, I don't is that overstepping to comment on
your physical form? No, thank you? I just I actually
might really love your hair. I just want to put
that out there. Thank you so much. Cooteene. Look away,
I'm looking away. I'm looking away, all right, now you
(15:05):
can look back, look back, because I need you to
understand and help with the clapping, because basically I would say,
move your tail up and down and then slap the
rest of your big body. Okay, so kind of like dish. Yes, oh,
can you just you're just getting a little bit of
slot that comes from the territory, right, But that's it,
(15:31):
that's it. Anything for the sake of theater. Absolutely all right, Coolteene,
you got any other vocab you want to go over? Yeah.
(15:54):
I once met a gruff woman named Peg and she
said she was a stage manager. So I'm assuming that
means lesbian. That's a good question. Yeah, yeah, you know
you're probably uh not wrong. Um no, um. Peg is
a dear friend of mine. You know Peg, I know Peg,
I know Peg. She's actually she's done Lion King, she's
(16:15):
done Wicked, she's done a Lad and she's really doing
the Disney circuit right now. And uh, she's pretty badass.
Stage managers are the glue that hold together the whole
entire show, okay, or the slime that holds my tail
in the muddy floor together. Yeah, yes, the gelatinous group,
if you will, I love it. Did I answer your
(16:38):
question anymore? Yeah? Okay. This is a combination of my
uncle and aunt's names Macbeth, mac and Beth. Yeah, that's
my uncle and my aunt serendipitous because Macbeth. It's an incredible,
incredible play written by, of course, the one and only Shakespeare,
(16:58):
William Shakespeare him sound so not not a musical, not
a musical, but see it. But how dare you bring
up anything that is not cool? Team? We're going to
talk about this later, but go ahead. I didn't know
that was the whole we're gonna talk about. We're gonna
talk about Eric. I'm sorry, all right, go ahead, Avery. Well,
I I do think there really should be a musical
(17:19):
version of every Shakespeare play. Unfortunately, I don't think there
is a Macbeth one. Well, hey, I mean, if we
get you and Peg and me and cool teen together,
I don't see where we couldn't make a all musicals
just saying all right, well, let me whip something up.
I can get a few sheet music, grab that spotlight
my friend. All right, but sure you were saying, uh no, basically, uh,
(17:40):
it's it's pretty cool that your aunt and uncle are
Mac Andbeth. I would I would also say be careful
because it is cursed. It's cursed, it's cursed. Then we
don't say that. Oh my god, the podcast just gonna fail.
I'm ruined. Oh gosh. Anyone who's listening, Um, just know
that it's we're just talking about the play and we
haven't performed it. Okay, so you think we're in the clear.
(18:04):
We're in the clear. All right, Thank worm, Thank worm.
We're in the clear. We say thank worm because you
know worms don't famously don't have a god. So thank worm. Alright.
I love it. Okay, I'll be honest, I feel like
I'm only halfway there. But that's all right, because we're
(18:24):
gonna pop into our next segment that I'm calling musical theater.
Musical theater. Okay, So Avery, here's how it works. Okay,
I'm gonna give you a series of scenarios okay, submitted
by myself Quotine in our listeners, and we want you
to say whether they are or are not musical theater. Cool,
(18:46):
very cool, Alright, let's get this going. Okay, let's do it.
Let's do it. Oh yeah, I love that voice. Alright, first, hup,
we got fiddler on the roof musical theater or not
musical theory at musical theater. Okay, absolutely great, checking that off.
All right, let's try this next one. A fiddler on
(19:08):
a roof musical theater. Musical theater really depends, really depends
on what on whether or not there is in fact
a spotlight on this fiddler on this roof. Okay, So
that's what distinguishes the musical theater fiddlers from the regular fiddlers,
because regular fiddlers, they're just doing it for ships and giggles. Yeah,
(19:33):
don't fucking swear on my show. Okay, don't swear on
my goddamn show. That's actually a game I like to
play when I hear a little kind of skirting noises
from over in the corner. I tried to guess whether
Bethelsa's having the ships or the giggles. That was pretty good,
Gold you know, like that one. Thank you, Just so
you know it's the shift. I rarely giggle unless we're
(19:54):
recording the podcast. Yeah, alright, let's let's go to this
next scenario already. All right, Okay, here we go, a
couple arguing in public musical theater or not musical theater.
If we're in tic tic boom, the musical musical theater.
If we're not tic tic booming, if we're not tictic booming,
(20:16):
not musical theater, not musical theater. Okay, great, alright, let's
go to this next one. We got when you put
a show on for your parents in your living room
musical theater, musical theater, musical theater. Wow, okay, you got
it right away. I had to jump in. Is just
something you've done, yes, when I was younger. Actually, I
(20:39):
used to stop Thanksgiving um every year and put on
a combination of any musical theater songs we wanted to
put on, normally from Wicked and normally the song what
is this feeling? Okay, I'm writing it down. I got
to write my mouth. Go ahead. Oh no, that's fine.
(20:59):
I also write it down for why isn't it cool?
Do you know what I can do it? Thank you
very much? Okay, it's pretty good. I'm pretty good in
my mouth. I can't wait to hear that voice. Then,
oh yeah, maybe I'm nervous alright, I don't make me sing. Well,
I'll be here with you, so don't even worry about it,
(21:22):
all right, I don't think about it. I don't think
about it. Yes, but I used to put on show
as musical theater. Let me ask, if you want to
write your own musical, what would it be called? That
is a great question, thank you. I'm tried my best.
I would have to say the title the musical would
be called Sparkly and Pink. The musical sparkling pink. You know,
(21:48):
sometimes I get sparkly and pink when the light hits
me just right, you know, I start a shimmer. It's
I look beautiful for about five seconds, and then it's
you know, back to worm. I'll have to come by
and then see that one time. Thank you. But what
would it be about sparkling pink? Um? I think it
would be uh an autobiographical uh story of my life
(22:11):
and how I've come into my own my own power
and uh. It would be um embracing femininity and also
understanding femininity in the context of stereotypes in the world. Listen,
I'm just a worm. But from where I'm squiggling, that
(22:32):
sounds like a great show. Thank you so much, i'd
get you free tickets. Of course. Well that'd be great.
You know, I can't escape the whole at the moment,
but once I do, you know, i'd be front row
ruining the view for everybody. Absolutely. All right, let's go.
Let let's go this next scenario. Let's see a really
crunchy leaf. Musical theater or not musical theater. I have
(22:55):
to tell you why I'm stumped on this one. I
really think, you know, at first, it's not musical theater, okay,
but then you know, if you start to see the
world in a sort of musical sort of way, the
crunch of a leaf could really be the percussion that
was needed for the day, an instrument of shorts, an
instrument um, sort of that extra flavor. You know, we
(23:17):
could probably put together. It's called an orchestra, right when
people play look at you? Yeah there, you know, I try.
I try. So maybe we can make an orchestra out
of all the garbage ship that's been thrown down here. Yeah,
I mean we got crunchy leaves, right, yeah, we got some.
We got a cool whip container. I bet when you
(23:39):
hit this is a nice noise. She ye oh yeah,
that's pretty nice. So yeah, I think I've been leaning
on what I think isn't half eaten hot pocket. Oh yeah,
that's my half eaten hot pocket. Sorry, I left it
on the chair. The chair made out of mud. Yes,
but that could be an instrument. It coold, Okay, Yeah,
I feel squishy sound. And when the mud leaks on
(24:02):
our collection of microwaves, it goes Oh yeah, I almost
forgot about our collection of microwaves. Yeah, that ding would
make for a good good orchestra section, the ding section.
I like that. Alright, let's see Okay, I gotta the
orchestra is down in a pit. Well, I feel seen.
(24:24):
I'm just gonna say it. I feel seen. Great, So
I could just be in the pit when I come
to your show. Oh my gosh, you know, I'm we'd
love to get you on. Maybe we can get you
on that cool webcam. I would love that. I'm gonna
start practicing. Alright, Okay, so I got I got two
more all let's see. Um Okay, a fart that started
a low pitch, it ends on a high note. Musical theater.
(24:47):
I'm not musical theater. Musical theater. Great, you're that one
seemed obvious. I'll just move right along. Here's my last one. Okay,
when a group of children come to the edge of
your whole and sing this song, don't go down into
that whole filled with mud and bugs and fowls. Don't
go down into that whole. There's a big, disgusting woman
(25:09):
worm down there. Musical theater or not musical theater. I'm
gonna say, the lyrics are a little bit far fetched. Um,
but musical theater. You know what I told him the
same thing. I said, the tunes pretty good. You gotta
work on the lyrics. It's just it's obvious, right it is.
Thank you for saying that. But musical theater. Musical theater. Okay, great,
(25:33):
Well that's all I got. Coutine. You've got any scenarios, yeah,
you know, unless they camp when everybody sings, I hope
you've had the time of your life and starts crying
and apologizes for how they've treated me. Is that musical theater? Oh?
Good one, That is a good one. And musical theater. Absolutely,
that is musical theater. That is probably one of the
(25:56):
most musical theater things you've said. Oh wow, I mean
I would love to watch it. Yes, I just I
just think about leaving. I did go to theater camp,
and I think about leaving this theater camp. Cotine, you
ran away from camp. That's how you fell in the whole. Yeah, wow,
tell us about theater camp. Well, um, you know, I
(26:16):
think about how we practically French kissed at the end
of camp after doing very much. What you said is
the French is a French kiss when you kiss with
a little mustache on. Uh, that's that's gonna be part
of it. Okay, great, especially if you're kissing Pierre Anitatomus
who was the French camper? All right he was? Um,
(26:41):
but yes, musical theater absolutely great. What else you got, Cotine? Uh?
What about rebooting some intellectual property from the Marvel Cinematic
universe in a really high value production that ends in
the deaths of multiple people? Is that musical theater? What
the fun? Did you just say? Yeah? What? I'm sorry?
(27:02):
Can you say it one more time? The whole thing? No?
Thank Cotine? What about no do it? What about when
you reboot intellectual property from the Marvel Cinematic universe in
a really kind intensity production that ends in the deaths
(27:23):
and injuries of multiple people? Is that musical theater, I'm
gonna have to say, um, unfortunately, yes, that is musical theater. Uh.
Spider Man the musical killed a few. Wow, spider Man.
That sounds like someone i'd be friends with. Warm and
spider Man. You know, wait, maybe if you bite me,
(27:46):
I'll get your magical wormpowers. Coltine, We've been over this.
I don't have teeth. Okay, damn it, We've tried. It
just ended up with me gumming your arm for like
an hour. Okay, Yes, it felt good though, Yeah, that's
why I never did it again. All Right, I have
another one. I have another one. Okay, great? What is it?
(28:07):
What about the racially driven gang wars of the nineteen
fifties is that musical theater? Wow? Um, this is above
my slimy head. Go ahead, avery, musical theater. Wow theater.
That also makes me think of there's a musical called
bugsy Malone, and that is twenties gangsters who shoot people,
(28:29):
but instead of shooting people with bullets, they shoot people
with pie. Well, so here's what I'm Here's what I'm
kind of getting about musical theater is that, as long
as it's got a musical element, pretty much anything can
be theater. Isn't that beautiful? That is so beautiful? Interesting? Interesting,
you know I'm doing Maybe, you know, maybe I can
(28:51):
have a show about a big worm that lives in
a hole in a cool teen that they have a
love hit relationship with. Yes, the advent terms of starting
a podcast. Honestly, that's not so different from the musical
I I said, I wanted to write. That's true. You know,
you're coming into your power, coming into that power. I
don't know what that means, but I like to out
of it. You got any you got any more scenario?
(29:14):
School team before we move on? Yeah, what about when
a group of children comes to the edge of the
hole and says, where are you? Where are you? Never mind?
We don't care God, the kids just come to the
hole and sing. It's like, I don't know who asked
him to. Yeah, but that group they have talent because
that song. I think their name was thin. Their name
(29:36):
was Search Party? Is that right? Or was it search
and Rescue something like that, something like that. Yeah, they
came in so briefly, you know, so so briefly, and
they were calling out to someone. I forget, I forget
the name. I don't know, but Oh was that was
that earlier today? Oh? Yeah, it happens all the time. Yeah,
(29:56):
because I think actually I saw them doing some jazz
squares while they were doing that. Oh wow, cool teen.
Maybe they're they're looking for you again, Maybe they maybe
they re up to the search. Maybe there's been uh
maybe one of our previous guests, you know, started a
little rumor that I was still a live down here,
and it gave some people hope, and they're finally gonna
come find me and escape me out of here. I
(30:18):
certainly hope not. I certainly hope not because I don't
want to be alone anymore. So you'd miss me? I mean,
I wouldn't I mean, and that I'd be furious you
left the whole without me. Yet, Well that's not what
you said. Would I have a vendetta? What you always say?
But just then, would I spend years training to go
(30:40):
to the surface and assassinate you? Yes, So if that's
what missing you is, then absolutely sure? Sure sure sure
you said that you'd be lonely. Fine, I miss you
a little bit. There we go. That's what I wanted
to hear. Don't make a thing out of it. Okay,
I'm looking away don't make a thing out of it,
or I won't let you play with the sticks. Deal.
(31:04):
But I'm I'm glad I witnessed that moment. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry you had to hear that. That was That
was fun. We try not to mix the personal with
the business. Yeah it's hard. You know, we're acquaintances, but
we also work together. Now show it's hard. I don't
overlap in the sections of our lives. Anyway. That was
my last That was my last great avery. I mean,
(31:26):
I think I've got a good grasp on musical theater
and I'm absolutely through. Oh my gosh, go tell all
your friends. I mean that, I'm so glad. I'm so glad.
Go tell all my what all of your friends, all
of your friends? What's a friend? It's um do you
know what? This were another for another time. I'll have
a friend expert come on, you know, for musical theater.
(31:49):
I don't want I don't want to burden you with
that question because it seems loaded. Alright, well, I'm excited.
(32:09):
Maybe we just hop into our third segment alright, which
I'm calling for those that gets her dirty. All right now,
for this segment, we're gonna do something different. I'm very
excited about it. Okay, so we're gonna take a brief break, right,
We're gonna stop recording. Then Avery and I are gonna
go rehearse what's called a musical duet, which I think
(32:33):
is a song with two people. Correct? Correct? Alright? Does
one person in a worm also work in this scenario?
It absolutely has to. Okay, great, I'm so excited. I'm nervous.
I'm so nervous to sing with you, Avery. Alright, so
we're gonna we're gonna stop recording, and then we'll be
right back. Alright, alright, we're back. Oh, Avery and I
(32:59):
have been. We're hear sing our little segmented booties off,
and I'm I'm really excited. Um uh, let's see, uh, cooteen,
do you wanna intro Avery and I in our song?
And now, creatures of the mud, put your appendages or
(33:19):
tails together for but fells of the muddy and avering
us bombed the pink and sparkly we go. I'm too excited.
Oh my gosh, sisters, sisters, there were never such devoting sisters.
I'm a giant worm down in a hole, that's true.
(33:42):
But pat doesn't stop me from loving you, carrying, sharing
every little thing that we are wearing. When a certain
gentelman arrived from Rome, she wore my extra skeleton and
ice dad home home games. Whoever, who is it? Together?
(34:05):
She slimmier than a suity hall. I can't help it.
Two different bodies, but both total hollies, you know. So
I'm a living feet dull. You are. Those who see
us always seem to want to get between us. Many
men have tried to let it it up, but no
(34:27):
one cap and the government tried to capture me to study.
Lord help the mister who humes between me and my sister,
and Lord help the sister who comes between me and
my man. You know. The other day two men approached
(34:49):
us and one said to me, what's happening to it?
Hell rude, I know. Then the other one threw a
net over me and tried to show me to the circus.
Da pickle, he sis not men? Who's there? Me? Sorry?
I just realized you aren't wearing any lipstick. Well, you know,
(35:09):
it's hard when you don't have any lips. You know.
They say the early bird gets the worm, but birds
tend to flee from her. It's my big personality. I've
got one. How can you tell which end of a
worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see
which end laughs? Um no, that's like really fucked up.
(35:38):
Oh types of weather. He sick together, she'll fry if
she's out in the sob do it? Do different monies?
Both total horties, you know. So I breathe through my skin.
That's true. When she's malting, people find me totally disgusted.
(36:01):
But under all that slimer all a sister ever needs.
Thank you for saying that. Nor help the lister who
blows between me and my sister, and Lord help the
sister who goes between me and my man. Sister, sisters
(36:35):
don't come between me and my man who I don't know.
I'm so good. That was exhilarating. Oh my gosh, I
mean we just bounced off each other. That was magic, Avery.
What was that thing we did? Were we sang notes
that sounded good together? It was harmonizing, harmonizing. Wow, I
(36:59):
love that. I love that very much. You're you're pretty good, Avery,
stob cool teen is watching. I'm just being honest. I'd
look away, but I honestly can't. I am enraptured by that. Performance.
You know, Avery, sometimes you know, if you want to
come back ever cool teen could have put their fingers
(37:21):
in their ears and close their eyes and uh, I
don't know, maybe we could do another type of do
it or something another. Forget it, never mind, forget it,
never mind, never mind. I didn't mean. I'm just kidding.
I'm kidding. We should keep our relationship professional for the
musicals we're gonna write. Absolutely, I'm not in the market
(37:42):
for anything other than a musical theater partner. Oh my god,
me either, yeah, me either. I love being Shingle, Yeah,
I love it. Yeah. Well, Avery, this was fantastic. Every
Is there anything you'd like to plug, anything you're working on,
anything at all. I'd love to plug my Instagram great, yes,
(38:03):
which is uh the Cosmic Dreamer Queen. And I'd also
like to plug that I'm writing a musical. Yes, I
am writing a musical. How dare you keep this from us?
And it is? Um I'll give you a little elevator
pitch about it. But it's basically about aliens who heard
(38:27):
music from the Golden Voyager and they don't like it,
so they come to Earth destroy Earth. That I get,
But then they hear musical theater and they fall in
love with earth music because of musical theater. Oh, please
let me audition, Please let me audition for an alien
please please, I beg you absolutely, just have your agent
(38:48):
call us and we will absolutely. Okay, great, my agent
is cool. Teen? Is that all right? Cool? Teen? We'll
we'll be in touch. All right. Well, we got to
discuss rates up top. You get nothing. I think that's
that's fair unbelievable. Well, folks, that is our episode, more specifically,
(39:08):
our last episode, at least for the time being, because
I have to shed my exoskeleton and it is very
complicated and painful and takes forever. Yeah, but hopefully we'll
be back soon. Oh yeah, it's a really dark time
when but fells to sheds exoskeleton. So if if anyone's
listening and you stumble upon a deep hole in the
(39:31):
woods near a camp that was supposed to be, you know,
a dump for bile hazards, please please please put a
really long ladder down. But if not, stay moddy, everybody. Sisters, sisters,
there were never such devoted sisters, never had to have
(39:54):
a chaperon. No, sir, I'm here to keep mid on
her here carrying, sharing every little thing that we are wearing.
When a certain gentleman a wrong from wrong, she wore
the dress and I stayed on
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