September 13, 2024 • 4 mins
Daily Dad Jokes (14 Sep 2024)
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Jokes sourced and curated from reddit.com/r/dadjokes.
Joke credits: hacksawjim89, lilxandrews, TacosAreJustice, Ryde29, naveird, plumbermat, danuser8, J_for_Jules, Left-Distribution-13, Soggy_Pie2349, truthhurts2222222, CalottoFantasy5, , Sir_Pluses, AndrewMacSydney, Highway2207, postingsomethinghere, dis907kid, Masselein, MohiFlaz
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
How do we know that Mike Tyson isn't very religious?
He punches people in the faith.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Did you know that being blind makes you curious? It
made Stevie wonder.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
What do you call a teacher who won't far it
in public a private tutor?
Speaker 2 (00:33):
What do you call a large group of Karens a
homeowner's association?
Speaker 1 (00:39):
What game do most of us play during working hours?
Call of duty?
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Just so everyone is clear, I'm going to put on
my glasses.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
What do you call a cow that's talking milkshake?
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I have a friend who writes music about sewing machines.
He's a singer songwriter, or so it seems.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
A photon chicks into a hotel. The bellhop asks, can
I help you with your luggage? The photon replies, no,
thinks I'm traveling light.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
I just caught a glimpse of my wife wearing her
sexy underwear. This can only mean one thing. Today is
laundry day.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
I once dated a woman I met on a ferris wheel.
The relationship went nowhere though we were just going in circles.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
The Dalai Lama hates paying by cash. He never gets
any change back, as change must come from within.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Laughter continues Shortly after this brief ad break, what do
you call a knight who out of the blue resorts
to boxing for money? Surprise fighter?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I see, said the blind man as he picked up
his hammer and saw.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
How does Harry Potter treat his mosquito bites with quidditch?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I found out what's wrong with me brain? On the
left side, nothing is right and nothing is left on
the right.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
If you're writing an article about vision, be sure to
cite your sources.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
What sound does a cow with an impressive jawl? I
make you? I'm Bob Jeffy.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
And I'm Montgomery Jones.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Stay tuned until the end of the episode for a
bonus joke. We're on a mission to spread the laughs
and groans far and wide, so please share one of
these jokes with your family and friends today.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Looking for more dad joke humor to share, then subscribe
to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly roundup
of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for you
to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign up today.
Check the sign up link in the show notes page
or visit Daily dadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad Jokes
(04:01):
Podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes
page for social media links and Joe credits. This show
was recorded in front of a canned studio audience. I
was pulled over by a cop driving an electric vehicle.
I was charged
How do we know that Mike Tyson isn't very religious?
He punches people in the faith.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Did you know that being blind makes you curious? It
made Stevie wonder.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
What do you call a teacher who won't far it
in public a private tutor?
Speaker 2 (00:33):
What do you call a large group of Karens a
homeowner's association?
Speaker 1 (00:39):
What game do most of us play during working hours?
Call of duty?
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Just so everyone is clear, I'm going to put on
my glasses.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
What do you call a cow that's talking milkshake?
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I have a friend who writes music about sewing machines.
He's a singer songwriter, or so it seems.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
A photon chicks into a hotel. The bellhop asks, can
I help you with your luggage? The photon replies, no,
thinks I'm traveling light.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
I just caught a glimpse of my wife wearing her
sexy underwear. This can only mean one thing. Today is
laundry day.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
I once dated a woman I met on a ferris wheel.
The relationship went nowhere though we were just going in circles.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
The Dalai Lama hates paying by cash. He never gets
any change back, as change must come from within.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Laughter continues Shortly after this brief ad break, what do
you call a knight who out of the blue resorts
to boxing for money? Surprise fighter?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I see, said the blind man as he picked up
his hammer and saw.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
How does Harry Potter treat his mosquito bites with quidditch?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I found out what's wrong with me brain? On the
left side, nothing is right and nothing is left on
the right.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
If you're writing an article about vision, be sure to
cite your sources.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
What sound does a cow with an impressive jawl? I
make you? I'm Bob Jeffy.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
And I'm Montgomery Jones.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Stay tuned until the end of the episode for a
bonus joke. We're on a mission to spread the laughs
and groans far and wide, so please share one of
these jokes with your family and friends today.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Looking for more dad joke humor to share, then subscribe
to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly roundup
of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for you
to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign up today.
Check the sign up link in the show notes page
or visit Daily dadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad Jokes
(04:01):
Podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes
page for social media links and Joe credits. This show
was recorded in front of a canned studio audience. I
was pulled over by a cop driving an electric vehicle.
I was charged
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