June 12, 2024 • 4 mins
Daily Dad Jokes (13 Jun 2024)
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Jokes sourced and curated from reddit.com/r/dadjokes. Joke credits: RoboticWarfare, God-2008, ddodd69, RoboticWarfare, StockInitial4460, houndoom92, KSJXVI, SelfishMentor, PutSimply1, Masselein, PutSimply1, mal221, , Remarkable_Age4838, Far-Device-9391, TheTrueMupster, ddodd69, Masselein, Man-e-questions
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Which nation has the longest sleeping hours Hibernation.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
What's the most unhonessed company? Disney? They're a lion came.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
I recently took a pull I saw that one hundred
percent of the people in the tent were angry when
it collapsed.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Why did Soviet pilots fly their jets so fast? They
were afraid of stalin.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
I just burned two thousand calories in twenty minutes. I
forgot to take the brownies out of the oven.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Never glue a piranha to a boomerang. It'll come back
to bite you.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
My wife wanted to change clothes right before we were
about to leave. I said, absolutely not. I would look
ridiculous in your dress.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
I was recently diagnosed with narcolepsy, but it's really not
a big deal. I'm not losing any sleep over it.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
The word incorrectly is spelled incorrectly.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
No one knows where all the stray dogs in my
city come from. The police are appealing for leeds. We'll
return with more laughs following this short break.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
What do you call a flower that doesn't last very long?
A temporari lily?
Speaker 1 (02:15):
What do you call a sick bird breaking the law illegal.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
If ever attacked by a mob of clowns, go for
the juggler.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Why did the cyclops close his school because he only
had one pupil.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
I'm always cleaning up pairs of pants off the floor
of my house. I guess someone needs to pick up
the slack.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I went to a carpet place downtown to get new
carpet for my new house. By the time I got home,
they had already installed padding and wall to wall carpet.
I was floored. I'm Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones.
There's a bonus dad joke waiting for you at the
end of the episode. Let's spread some happiness or pain
(03:15):
with these jokes. Wishing you a great day, and I'll
be back with more jokes tomorrow. Thank you for tuning.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
In looking for the perfect Father's Day gift. We have
the official Daily Dad Jokes Podcast electronic joke button, now
available on Amazon, a massive five hundred preloaded dad jokes
guaranteed to make you laugh and groan. Check the show
notes page for the link. The Daily Dad Jokes podcast
(03:46):
is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes page
for social media links and joke credits. This show was
recorded in front of a canned studio audience. What do
you call a plate of food in space? A satellite
dish
Which nation has the longest sleeping hours Hibernation.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
What's the most unhonessed company? Disney? They're a lion came.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
I recently took a pull I saw that one hundred
percent of the people in the tent were angry when
it collapsed.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Why did Soviet pilots fly their jets so fast? They
were afraid of stalin.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
I just burned two thousand calories in twenty minutes. I
forgot to take the brownies out of the oven.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Never glue a piranha to a boomerang. It'll come back
to bite you.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
My wife wanted to change clothes right before we were
about to leave. I said, absolutely not. I would look
ridiculous in your dress.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
I was recently diagnosed with narcolepsy, but it's really not
a big deal. I'm not losing any sleep over it.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
The word incorrectly is spelled incorrectly.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
No one knows where all the stray dogs in my
city come from. The police are appealing for leeds. We'll
return with more laughs following this short break.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
What do you call a flower that doesn't last very long?
A temporari lily?
Speaker 1 (02:15):
What do you call a sick bird breaking the law illegal.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
If ever attacked by a mob of clowns, go for
the juggler.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Why did the cyclops close his school because he only
had one pupil.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
I'm always cleaning up pairs of pants off the floor
of my house. I guess someone needs to pick up
the slack.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I went to a carpet place downtown to get new
carpet for my new house. By the time I got home,
they had already installed padding and wall to wall carpet.
I was floored. I'm Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones.
There's a bonus dad joke waiting for you at the
end of the episode. Let's spread some happiness or pain
(03:15):
with these jokes. Wishing you a great day, and I'll
be back with more jokes tomorrow. Thank you for tuning.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
In looking for the perfect Father's Day gift. We have
the official Daily Dad Jokes Podcast electronic joke button, now
available on Amazon, a massive five hundred preloaded dad jokes
guaranteed to make you laugh and groan. Check the show
notes page for the link. The Daily Dad Jokes podcast
(03:46):
is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes page
for social media links and joke credits. This show was
recorded in front of a canned studio audience. What do
you call a plate of food in space? A satellite
dish
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