BONUS: Ask Abuelita!

Have you ever wanted dating advice directly from an Abuelita? Now's your chance! Tune in while Abuelita Liliana gives on-the-spot advice to our listeners after reading their questions. Have a question for Abuelita? DM us on Instagram @ datemyabuelitafirst. Besitos!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hello, everyone, It's Liliana from Date My Abuelita First. Now
with all my new NATO's, Natas and nitas on the show,
I am really touched at how they all put their
trust in me. Thank you for doing so. Awelita is
here to help you find love. Now. I may have
a lot of experience, but let's see how my experience

(00:27):
holds up when listeners right in with their dating questions.
Oh my goodness, and I have to give advice on
the spot. I can do that to our listeners. If
you've ever wanted advice directly from an abuelita like me,
well now it's your chance. Dm us with your dating
questions at Date my Abuelita First on Instagram and I

(00:50):
will select a few questions to answer. Now let's get
the advice trained Roland. Here we go again. The question
comes from Matthias. My girlfriend of six months is throwing
hints that she wants to move in together. It's more
than hints now because in the last couple of weeks

(01:11):
she started sending me listings on Zillow and Craigslist that
she likes. And while she has an outright said she
wants to move in, the writing is on the wall
for sure, and we've definitely talked about it casually before.
While I'm a little apprehensive to move in together, I
gotta say it would be nice that she lives a
bit far from me and we only get to really

(01:32):
see one another once a week, which doesn't feel like enough.
Despite wanting to see her more and see what it's
like to have that kind of intimacy, I don't know
if I'm ready to move in. I'm thirty seven and
I've never lived with a partner before. There's a lot
about the possibility that excites me and a lot that
makes me hesitant. I'm a little scared of losing my

(01:54):
autonomy and my alone time. I'm unsure when I'll know
if it's the right time or if I should just
go for it and see what happens. Another big factor
is I've lived in my current place for over ten
years and it's rent controlled. I live in a city
we're finding a good place to live at an affordable
price is really uncommon, But I know my girlfriend would

(02:17):
prefer to live in a different part of town. I
want us both to be happy. What should I factor
in and making such a big decision, and is it
too early. What do you mean too early? Are you
looking at the clock? If there's any clock that you
should be looking at right now, it's the fact that
you are thirty seven years old and there is no

(02:40):
more time to waste. You have heard those simple words
that everybody mentions, life is so short. In regards to
her looking for places on Zillow and Craigslist, I think
that's pretty cute. I think that shows her enthusiasm for
this relationship though it is six months old. Sometimes it

(03:01):
takes six years, sometimes it's never. But you have the
opportunity to do it now. Now you're apprehensive about a
couple of things, rent control, really, really, we're talking money already. No,
how about we just get it done now. Do you
have that kind of intimacy in order to fulfill this dream? Well?

(03:24):
Do you? You will not be questioning unless it was there.
You are excited about the possibility, But at the same time,
you're on that sense, a bit hesitant and a bit
scared you're going to lose your autonomy. You're alone time.
How about your togetherness? How about enjoying all that beautiful
life that you have with someone that you can truly

(03:47):
truly enjoy your life? With don't be so hesitant. If
you're asking questions is because you are ready for the answer.
You want someone to tell you what is right, and
Awilita is right. Here, make a chance, leap with great faith,
follow your heart. What can happen? It doesn't work, at

(04:08):
least you gave it your best shot. Are you ready
for another question? This one is from Rex. I was
talking to a super hot person on a dating apple.
Here we start with the hot one TVH. I was
looking for a fun, spicy encounter. They told me they

(04:31):
were going out of town, but with text. When they
got back, I thought, oh, yeah, right, no one ever
follows up. Well, to my surprise, when they got back,
they texted asking what I was up to over that weekend.
I invited them to hang out the next day, but
didn't hear back. The next day they texted saying they'd
been sick. Yeah, possible, but a bit sketchy. We made

(04:56):
plans to hang out the following weekend. Hang out arrived,
I hadn't heard from them and sent a text no answer.
The next day I received texts from them, but from
a new different number. Oh my goodness. They had gotten
a new phone and yeah, lost their contexts. Sure, they

(05:19):
were so sorry for ghosting, and that that hadn't been
their intention. I don't believe them throughout all of this.
My friends said, it seemed sus slash red flaggy, but
not totally out of the realm of possibilities, and I
could try one more time. I replied, nicely but succinctly.

(05:40):
I asked if they wanted to hang that week. They
said yes, excitedly, and we decided on a day. Well,
two hours later they texted again and said that they
actually weren't very available with the lame excuse, they had
so many opportunities to ghost. Why follow up after their
trip out of town? Why tell us they got a

(06:02):
new number? Why tell me they got a new phone.
I just wanted to f a blank si kay explanation,
exclamation exclamation, Well is their loss? Now? Tell me I
will need that. What was up with this person? And
how do I avoid situations like this moving forward? Well,

(06:22):
if you put yourself on the spot, take what comes
with it. Your first sentence to me said, you're looking
for a hot person to have a spicy encounter. Well
there was nothing serious there. You were not looking for
someone who was real and honest. No, and this person
they got the drift. They knew they could do whatever

(06:44):
they wanted, especially since you kept texting them. Once a
person ignores you the first time, do you really need
a second opportunity to be put down or abused or ignored?
This is how the relationship will continue. Your intentions are good,
but maybe your thoughts should be a bit more condensed

(07:07):
than saying, maybe I'm looking for something else. This person
did not want to connect with you. This person did
not have the time for you. This person did not
have the respect enough to tell you anything that was real.
There was no honesty, no truth, and you accepted it.
And remember that in the process of it all. You

(07:28):
can ask a million friends how they feel about the
situation that you are going through, but they are all
talking about their own life experiences. Now Awilita is telling
you about a whole world of experiences and giving you
the best advice I can so that you can find
that goodness, that humbleness, that kindness, that light that will

(07:52):
shine in your life. So move on, find reality and
stick with it. When MISA artists don't forget to listen
to date my Awilita first on Thursdays and while you're listening.
Don't forget to click that subscribe button. Come on, do
it now. Find us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

(08:16):
or wherever it is that you listen to your favorite
shows like Date My Awilita, First Love You Miss Mitos
Mitas mtis And if you have a burning question that
is keeping you guessing, well don't guess anymore. You know
that Awealita has your back all the way dm us
at Date My a Wilita first on Instagram and we'll

(08:37):
work on getting this answered for you. I'm a real,
real Awilita and I've got all the advice in the world.
You all